Transcription
Today I'm going to talk about a book called The 48 Laws of Power. This book is very famous among politicians, prisoners in the USA, celebrities such as 50 Cent, and people who are in power. I hesitated quite a lot if I should share this book with you or not because the book is manipulative to me. Some of the laws mentioned there are unethical and I personally don't recommend applying them. But this doesn't mean that they will not be applied against you by others. So, I'm going to share only certain laws that I believe can benefit you and help you stay protected when these laws are applied against you.
Law number one, never outshine your master. While you try to impress the people above you, don't show your talents too much. This can make your superiors feel insecure and they'll find ways to replace you. For example, let's say you are 20 years old and have a new job where you have a team leader who is 40 years old. After several months, you realize that you know more than your team leader and have great ideas about your team or department. In this situation, never show your superiority because people in power never want to look powerless and weak. Your superior knowledge is a threat to your team leader and his position. He might smile at your face and act like he likes what you do, but be sure that in the first opportunity, he will replace you with a less intelligent person. Always know your limits and if you want to implement your ideas then do it in a way that makes your superiors look good and smart even if you know that they're not. In this way you will get their support and they won't see you as a threat. If you look carefully, you might also remember some friends around you who did not obey this law and faced difficulties, such as a smart schoolmate who always showed off his knowledge and tried to look smarter than the teacher, but somehow always struggled to get a good grade from that teacher.
Law number two, never put too much trust in friends. Learn how to use enemies. The key to power is the ability to judge who is the best person to help your interests in all situations. Keep friends for friendship, but work with skilled and competent people, especially when it comes to doing serious business. Always stay away from your friends and instead hire a former enemy. The enemy will be more loyal than a friend because he has a lot to prove to you. The author says you should fear more from friends than from enemies. Friends are more likely to envy and betray you, and they limit your power since it's harder to keep a professional distance. Friends are not always honest and they don't express their feelings openly and it's hard to read their intentions. In general, people love to think that they have achieved something by themselves. That is why your friend can easily ignore all the favors you've done for him as a friend and start to think that he has achieved everything by himself.
Law number four, always say less than necessary. The more you say, the less impressive and in control you seem to be, and the higher the chance that you'd say something foolish. Powerful people tend to say little. This makes them impressive and intimidating because you can't guess what they're thinking, especially when it comes to negotiation in interviews. Always pay attention to yourself so that you don't say more than necessary because it will start working against you. If you are against a strong negotiator, you'll see that he does not speak a lot. He will shortly express his point and then will stay silent so that you start talking. Silence is painful. It makes you feel uncomfortable. For example, I'm sure you've noticed that when you're having a conversation with someone, there comes a moment both of you stop talking and you experience strange silence. It feels awkward, doesn't it? When this happens, you just want to say something so that this awkward moment disappears. Sometimes you even say something unrelated in order to kill the silence and keep the conversation going. As a result, you may end up saying things that you shouldn't say or reveal too much information and lose your power in the negotiation.
Law number nine, win through your actions, never through your arguments. It's much more powerful to get others to agree with you through your actions without saying a word. Always demonstrate instead of trying to convince someone with your words. Famous sculptor and architect Michelangelo was working on a sculpture. And when he was about to finish, the arrogant city mayor walked inside and said, "You've done a good job, but the nose is too big." Michelangelo knew that the nose was perfect. It was just the perspective where Sodorini was standing. But instead of arguing with him, he started hitting the nose slowly. He wasn't changing the nose. He was making some of the remaining dust fall. While doing this, Michelangelo said, "Okay, go look from there and tell me if it's okay now." So, Dorini looked and said, "Yes, it looks great now." Every argument won through words lasts only a short period of time and creates resentment on the other side. So, win through your actions, never through arguments.
Law 10, infection. Avoid the unhappy and unlucky. You can die from someone else's misery. Emotional states are as infectious as disease. You may feel you are helping the drowning man, but you are only speeding up your own disaster. The unfortunate sometimes draw misfortune on themselves. They will also draw it on you. You may feel like you are helping that friend who constantly goes to jail or breaks simple rules, but you are getting infected. Associate with the happy and fortunate instead.
Law 13. When asking for help, appeal to people's self-interest, never to their mercy or gratitude. If you need help from someone, don't bother to remind him of the things you did for him in the past. He will find a way to ignore you. Instead, uncover something in your request that will benefit him and emphasize it with big, bold letters. He'll respond enthusiastically when he sees something to be gained for himself. When I was starting to create these videos, I approached people and asked for their feedback. One day, I called a friend and asked if he could meet me for 10 minutes to give me feedback. As soon as I called him, he started to make excuses and said that he was tired. Once I heard this, I knew that I had to change my approach. So, I cut his sentence off and said, "Okay, okay, no problem. We can check it out later. By the way, I heard you're planning to buy an investment property. Do you want to meet me for a coffee? I can give you some advice because I just recently bought an investment property for myself." He stayed silent for a few seconds and then asked a few questions about the flat. After a few hours, we met for coffee. I told him everything I knew and in the end I asked if he could give me feedback right then. Of course, he said yes and gave me his feedback. Now, you might call this manipulation, but I call it asking things the right way. We humans are selfish by nature. Whether you accept it or not, this is the fact. Whatever we do, our mind always asks this question. What's in it for me? If there is nothing to be gained, then we don't take action. Pay special attention to this law, especially when it comes to asking for help from a person who is more experienced or knowledgeable than you. These people don't want to waste their time. So, first research their business and see in which areas you can help them or what kind of problem you can solve for them and offer your solution first in return for what you want from them.
Law 28. Enter action with boldness. If you're unsure about your action, don't attempt it. Your doubts and hesitations will infect your execution. Timidity is dangerous. If you must do something, then better to do it with boldness. Any mistakes you commit through boldness are easily corrected with more boldness. Everyone admires the bold. No one honors the timid. A few years ago, one of my friends was invited for an interview for a position that he did not know much about. Surprisingly, he passed the interview and got the job. And when I asked how he did it, he said that there were several questions that he couldn't answer, but he always showed can do mentality and told the interviewer that he would learn anything needed and be the best performer in the department. Several months later, when he was having coffee with the hiring manager, he said, "The only reason I hired you was because of your courage and boldness. Otherwise, you had very few qualifications for the position. Most people in your place wouldn't even dare come to the interview."
Law 36. Disdain things you cannot have. Ignoring them is the best revenge. By acknowledging a problem, you give it existence. The more attention you pay to your enemy, the stronger you make him. And a small mistake is often made worse and more visible when you try to fix it. It is sometimes best to leave things alone. If there is something you want but can't have, simply disregard it. The less interest you show, the more superior you seem. By acknowledging your enemies, even if only to fight with them, you open yourself to their influence. By ignoring them, you cancel them out. This unsettles and infuriates them. But since they have no dealings with you, there's nothing they can do.
Law 40, despise the free lunch. What is offered for free is dangerous. It usually involves either a trick or a hidden obligation. It's also often wise to pay the full price. By paying your own way, you will stay clear of gratitude, guilt, and deceit. Free is one of the most expensive words you can hear. Whenever you hear something is free, be very careful. Free is almost never free. There's always a price hidden behind it. For example, when you wait in line for 1 hour to get a $2 product, do you really think that you got it for free? You just paid for it with one hour of your time. Do you really think that your 1 hour is worth $2? Or do you really believe that free shipping is free? It's never free. It's just hidden in the price you pay.
Law 41. Avoid stepping into a great man's shoes. What happens first always appears better and more original than what comes after. If you succeed a great man or have a famous parent, you'll have to accomplish double their achievements to outshine them. Establish your own name and identity by changing the course. For example, let's say you start a new job and find out that the person who is working in that position before you started was one of the best employees in the company. Can you realize how hard it would be for you to succeed in that position? The previous person has already set a high standard and expectations and people will expect the same from you. If you want to be successful in that position, you will have to produce twice the results of the previous employee in order to be noticed or you must create your own way so that they don't compare you with the previous employee. Most probably you will not be able to do the first option as a newcomer. So the best way is to create your own way and distinguish yourself. But be careful when you do that because the past often has valuable elements and it would be foolish to reject everything in order to distinguish yourself.
Law 45. Preach the need for change, but never reform too much at once. Everyone understands the need for change in the abstract, but people are creatures of habit and they love doing the things they used to do. Too much innovation is traumatic and will lead to anger and opposition. If you are new to a position of power or trying to build power, always respect the old way of doing things. If change is necessary, make it feel like a gentle improvement to the past.
Law 46. Never appear too perfect. People absolutely hate it when they see that you are better than them. Appearing better than others is always dangerous, but the most dangerous of all is to appear to have no faults or weaknesses. Envy creates silent enemies. It's smart to occasionally display defects in order to deflect envy. Only a minority can succeed at the game of life, and that minority inevitably arouses the envy of those around them. Once you succeed, the people to fear the most are those in your own circle, the friends and acquaintances you have left behind.