Transcription
Last question, how do I know if my partner is a narcissist? It's the wrong question. It doesn't matter. Everything we just talked about negates all the labels we throw at people. Avoidant, narcissist, self-centered. I don't care what you want to label them as.
The only question that matters is, do they care about putting in the work of humility and mutual respect and consideration? Do they care about honoring your boundaries? Do they care about what you need to experience closeness? If the answer is no, you can label them as whatever you want. Here's a label for them: not a great fit for you. Right? Right.
When we're on our own healing journey, we don't need to judge other people. We don't need to make them suffer so that they better understand our pain. We can more easily see them for who they are deep inside, which is sometimes someone who is scared and unhealed, and that's why they do the things that they do. And we can have empathy and compassion for what they went through. That doesn't mean we need to step into their life and become a punching bag and allow them to project all their unhealed trauma onto us.