Transcription
The number seven, it's a sacred number. Can be a mystical number. It even shows up in the seven chakras. Even though I know there's way more than seven, but traditionally we know seven, seven days of the week, seven deadly sins. It's also said to be lucky number seven. And yes, people talk about the body regenerating every seven years.
But for highly sensitive empaths like you and me, these cycles are lived and felt in a very particular and maybe peculiar way. And I've got a little theory behind them that I came up with that I thought you might find a little interesting. This isn't a theory for everyone, but you can see it more of a map for people who do feel everything more deeply and who might feel like they are on the fringe of society, living outside of the box. Maybe you can even sense the undercurrent of these seven-year cycles in your own life. I, for one, do. I just completed the end of the seventh cycle.
These seven-year chapters are not just changes of age. They're initiations. Each one carves into us, shaping our sense of safety, creativity, love, power, and awakening. So, in this video, I'm going to walk you through the seven seven-year cycles of life. Not as a philosophy, not even as a psychology, but I guess more as a lived experience for myself and maybe for you too. So by the end, you might recognize your own story written in these cycles. And I want you to understand these cycles. These cycles aren't done in a linear way, but we're looking at each cycle as a spiral, as it's getting more inward. Okay? As we are getting more inward to ourselves.
And this first one that I'll talk about is from when you were born to the age seven, of course. And we can call this the rooting years because this is the time in our lives that is said to be when the framework of our psyche is laid down. We are the most impressionable during this time, and it's also when our attachment style is created. And since I'm calling it the rooting years, yes, our foundations, our roots. But we can also attach this time in our lives to the energy center of the root chakra, cuz this is the energy of safety and security. During this phase, we determine if the world is a safe place to live or if we need to be more cautious. Moving forward, this energy is always being challenged. Our sense of groundedness and safety is a home base for everything. And this is why I see a lot of the inner child work that we do is going to bring us back to sometime between the ages of zero and seven as a core memory that continues to play out in our current realities of feeling safe, of feeling secure. And this we will see show up as it relates to our fears of failure, fear of abandonment, and fear of rejection. This is also a time that if you grew up in poverty or scarcity of any sort, it's likely that it's going to be carried with you in the following cycles until you've reached the heaviest dark night of the soul. We'll get to that one later. Any limitations that you face during these years is being subconsciously programmed into you, which you'll see limiting your future growth until you've managed to uncover them in later years. I see this time as when our natural talents are observed and depending on how well they're nurtured and explored will depend on how well you're able to integrate the challenges of these upcoming cycles. Someone who had a love for painting and art, but instead was forced into hockey, they might experience a different outcome in terms of their own individuation in the cycles to come versus someone who loved to play music and was supported in this endeavor. It's likely that they're going to hold a stronger foundation for overcoming personal limitations in the years to come. This is what we can see as a protective factor that is being rooted in those early years.
Ages 7 to 14, we can call the shaping years. So, if you imagine you're a tree and you've just built the roots, well, now it's time to shape yourself. Like, how's it looking up there? And these are those awkward years, the puberty years, the years when we're no longer a baby and we're not yet a grown-up. But for the most part, we've established a view of the world we live in based on the opportunities that we've been given so far. And this is the energy center of the sacral chakra, the point where our creativity has been explored. We know more or less what our strengths are and what our weaknesses are. This is also the sexual center. As we get closer to the end of this cycle, we may have been exposed to certain sexual advances, interests, and for the most part, not in an appropriate way. And let me tell you, this is especially detrimental for those who are sensitive, naive, vulnerable to needing external acceptance and validation. So this might create a warped sense of how we get validation not just for sensitive girls but also for sensitive boys. Bullying, not fitting in seems to be even more pronounced in this cycle, and thus the energy center becomes more cautious than it is playful. There is very much a need to belong and be accepted. The awareness that one is different in some way comes to light. But it's still not certain in what way. The fear is being challenged instead of building trust. Codependency is setting in as a learned behavior, as is the fawning and people-pleasing that start to show up during this time. And that anxious attachment style is likely to be the most dominant. And not only that, the general anxiety that one feels has surfaced. And it's likely that it's going to be seen in the cycles to come. A saving grace, a saving grace moving forward will be the ability to hang on to and commit to one's creative talents and interests. Again, is your protective factor in place to get you through the rest of these cycles or has it been diminished? When our inner child work goes back to the ages between 7 to 14, it is to address self-confidence, self-esteem, self-worth. Feelings of doubt and anxiety become more rooted in this cycle. And if not supported, it's going to carry on through the following cycles. The truth is that it's highly unlikely that our doubts and worries are ever understood. And if tended to, would be with dismissal and invalidating experiences. "Don't think that way. Don't feel that way. Why would you feel that way? You have no reason to worry or to doubt yourself." "Oh, we all doubt ourselves. Get over yourself." This is the cycle when we learn about true compassion or we don't. And when we go back, it's always what we wished someone would have listened, understood, or just been present with us without fixing anything, without dismissing it with a joke or a laugh or a distraction to a treat or a fun activity. And of course, if that's what happened, then moving forward, that's the way you'll end up treating yourself and probably your own kids, too.
Then we get into what I call the storm years, ages 14 to 21. This is when one's personal power and freedom, individuation is launched. If one hasn't secured their sense of safety in the world, then there's not going to be much of personal power felt. This is the energy center of self-esteem, confidence, and independence. Creativity still plays a very important role during this cycle, and it's going to lead one toward empowerment of thyself even in the face of insecurity, adversity, anxiety. Creativity is what helps the individuation process along. As it was difficult in the last seven years, all that codependency that might have been learned in the last cycle may now start to grow as one looks to relationships for validation and acceptance. Love and belonging is as important to those in this time of their lives as it is to building their self-esteem. If the sensitive person takes whatever love and belonging they can get in the cycle, it will set for a pattern in the following seven-year cycle. But if they can release this need, they might be saved from the codependency of relationships. But instead, they might find themselves pursuing validation and acceptance from a career where they might find themselves overinvested as a way to prove themselves worthy. This can also be the first cycle where that dark night of the soul might appear. It can be a very dark, depressing, even morbid time that's characterized by disconnection with society, with the self, self-harming behaviors, and even ongoing projection of harm from family members unconsciously taking place, only to really be discovered as how harmful all that really was in the next cycle. Core memories that are found in this age are anger, frustration, and feeling overwhelmed. Many sensitive people will stuff down the feelings of anger and frustration. And even if expressed, they're going to be chastised for it. So, you quickly learn that anger and frustration get you nowhere. And instead, you internalize that anger and frustration into yourself, leaving you feeling overwhelmed with so many emotions. It's probably also the time when the body starts to gain a lot of tension and discomfort, and chronic pain starts to set in. And because you got this overwhelming of emotions that are not allowed to be expressed and it's too much, this is what leads to that dark time. And now holding on to such a low vibrational feeling with no outlet but back into yourself leads to a lot of self-destructive behaviors. It can be a very confusing time.
And so then we get into the searching years, which is 21 to 28. A surge for meaning of life is sought after here. This is where we are challenging the norms that we were raised with. We're even challenging our present relationships with our parents, with our friends, with our siblings. From the ages of 21 to 28 is when the heart is open to marriage, relationships, settling down, and long-term commitments. If the sensitive person is immersed in work instead, then relationships will take a back seat and not be as important. But this might also be the years when the creativity is really lost. And it's not to say the creativity is lost. It might just not be fueled from inward motivation, but the craving to view aesthetically pleasing beauty, music is still very much at the forefront of their existence. Because remember, this is where the searching is happening. Literature, poetry, and it might be the first time that you come across your first spiritual text that starts to change the trajectory of your life. There is this desire that comes at the end of the cycle for balance, meaning, wholeness, and meaningful relationships. Which is why there might be a complete overhaul in this area. And that anger and frustration from the previous cycle may now have been completely silenced. So much so that you pride yourself on not being an angry person. You look down on people who get angry and you can't understand why they get so upset about things. You see it as a weakness.
So now we go into the illusion years. This cycle has emerged to a very clear lack of personal boundaries. Boundaries are not even something that this cycle is aware of. But if not caught on soon, it's going to show itself in the next cycle. If one starts to get a sense here that something is missing, then they'll find themselves speaking out more. It might not always go the best, but a certain level of confidence with their voice has been found. And maybe too, that anger is starting to come to the surface. They may have chosen a life with someone who seems to check all the boxes, but people-pleasing tendencies are still quite prevalent because remember, there's an extreme lack of boundaries. And despite all that knowledge that they've gained up until this point, it's still mostly very innocent. They find themselves agreeing to things that deep down go against their values. There is an illusion of safety and security during this time, but they're still pretty reckless in their choices and decisions when it comes to friends and relationships. They might be excelling at work, but they're too, they're too advanced for their own good. And likely they're still settling in roles that they're soon going to outgrow. So this is when your pride, your codependency, your numbing has all come full tilt. You're fully in the illusion. You can't even see it. You think everyone else is the problem, or you don't see any problems at all.
Then we come to the awakening years, age 35 to 42. This is by far the most predominant cycle of seeing things for what they really are. They start to open up, see their own blind spots, but maybe still question themselves. They know this whole time they have chosen a path that was to impress others, to please others, or to even help and be of service to others, when their own creative interests and talents take that back seat. They will often go on a deep spiritual journey. At this time, they might have experienced something called a kundalini awakening and go through another dark night of the soul. This might also be a time when spiritual psychosis or spiritual bypassing, spiritual ego all come to the surface. Unbeknownst to them, of course, that that's what that is. They might take a huge leap of faith in some way to really pursue their creative endeavors, really go full force into it for once and for all, especially with all this energy that they're generating on this spiritual awakening.
Then we come to this last cycle. I mean, of course, there's going to be some more, but in this video, as I'm talking about the seven cycles, which I will call the Phoenix years. And keep in mind, that last cycle had a very dark night of the soul, but this one, well, that's why it's called the Phoenix years for a reason. For many sensitive people, depending on the trajectory of their life, this will prove to be the most transformational and awakening period so far. And like I said, it's going to come with another dark night that is even heavier than the previous cycle, but not too different from their first one back in the third cycle of life from when they were around 14 to 21. This is because there's going to be another period of recklessness, self-harm in some way, and possibly a resurgence of codependent patterns. But by the end of this cycle, most have come to a state of resolve. And if not in this cycle, then for sure by the next, ages 49 to 56, and even later bloomers may find this in 56 to 63. Because it's very possible that this 42 to 49 year cycle can drag on into another one or two cycles and another 7 to 14 years, depending on one's capabilities to escape that last dark night. As noted, it is the heaviest and most debilitating that not many can recover from successfully. These Phoenix years, you are rising from the ashes, from nothing to wow, something pretty great.
So, of course, our lives don't all unfold the same. It's moving in this spiral. It's going to circle back through a lot of familiar themes, old wounds, and hidden truths. But each time, I hope we're able to return with more strength, more wisdom, and more awareness. So for highly sensitive empathic souls, these cycles carry even deeper significance because I believe that those who are capable of the most profound life transformations are those empathic souls because they have seen so much darkness and experienced so much devastation and suffering that the only way to really awaken and see the true light is to have gone through such despair and darkness. Each stage is testing our resilience. It's testing our ability to be vulnerable, not only with others, but with ourselves. And it's really revealing over time who we truly are. You know, we're writing our own story. We're not following a story that was written by someone else. And so over time, it's this path of reclaiming our gifts, reclaiming our creativity, our compassion, our intuition, our authentic real self who's there all along. We just kind of, you know, went off track from time to time. Overall, it's simply the rhythm of our own growth. You can see it as a cosmic map that's guiding you back home to yourself.
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