Transcription
When you see marriages in which women actually make more money than their husbands, there's a higher chance of divorce. There are all these other awful things that are associated with it that I discuss in the book. Yeah.
Like there's more and more common cheating on the male part. Yeah. No, it's becoming more common. One in seven marriages are actually women are primary bread winners now. And also they're kicking ass in college in a way men are. Men have checked out. Yeah.
You know, there's you talk about what's the word I don't know for like marrying up. Hypergamy. Exactly. I was testing you. Um, hypergamy, which is the the square root of the hypotenuse, by the way, for kids who are watching this doing their geometry homework. No, hypergamy is um involved here because um the more men check out as far as academia, yeah. They graduate much less, much fewer men now. Yeah.
I mean, men are the ones who need affirmative action now in in in college. I mean, women can't find guys to marry up to. Exactly. Uh, there's a stat that we keep called the unemployed. But the definition of unemployed is you don't have a job, but you're looking for one. There's another stat which has, I don't remember the number, but it's an astoundingly high number, like 7 million. Yeah. That's not unemployed. It's not working and not looking. Right. Not working and not looking. And it's something like seven million men in this country. 11 million unfiltered. Very content to stay home with the Xbox. Yep. Yeah. That's not attractive to a woman. No.
Women do like achievement. You know, they like, you know, it's and it's not just the money. It's also just feeling like this person has ambition. They're moving towards something. They have joy in their life. If you, I imagine if you are sitting in front of a screen all day playing video games, online betting, you have no goals, you don't get, you know, dressed. Um, I don't imagine some light to be very happy. And so if you're dating, I mean, someone like that's probably not even dating, but if they were, you don't really have as much to talk about.
But so many women are going out with guys like that. Is that because there's just nobody else? I think so. I think it may be some cases those women may feel like they can help this person or want to, but in time, I really think that just leads to resentment over time. Or it's because like the messaging from society is, you know, women are doing so great, that's okay, you can be the primary bread winner, you can take care of this man, he doesn't need to take care of you. That's sexist if you want a man to take care of you. I see a lot of that in young women. I feel really badly for them because I, I don't see that ending well. Because especially as you, if you as women continue succeeding in life, which you likely will, because like you said, women are doing so well occupationally and in education and they're outgraduating men. And if you're with a guy like this who, if he's struggling with his mental health, say he has low testosterone, say he's got um, say he's watching porn every day, multiple times a day, so he has no motivation to do anything sexual or otherwise. I mean, that's not going to be a very good future for either of you.
I have seen in more than one movie. I can't think of what they are now. Um, not big movies, but movies where there was this plot point where there's a couple and the hus, I think it's usually they're married. He's um, he's not really working because he wants to make his dream of being in the band work. Mhm. He's got a band. Mhm. And he's mad at the wife who's like hawking him to like, get off your ass and get a job, do something. That you don't believe in me. Yeah. You know, the band. The band's going to work, man. We're good. And you know, if they put it in movies, I always feel like it must be true. That's how I know everything about children. I don't have children. I work very hard to never be around a child. But I see what it looks like from every single movie and television show and it always looks the same, like a nightmare. Like a total nightmare where the kids don't respect the parents. They're yelling at them. They're cursing at them. They're doing things where I, they would just my mother would just [ __ ] kill me. You know? Yeah. Um, so it must be true. And I feel like this must be true because they keep putting this into movies.
Well, at least that guy in the movie has a band, right? At least he's working towards something. He's not just sitting around like, well, doom scrolling all day long. I feel like a band may be even worse because it gives you hope. The false. Yeah. It gives you hope. And you know your band is not, you could. Yes. Anything could happen.
But you know, the other thing I would say is because there are fewer viable bachelors for women, there comes a point where a woman, if she does want to have kids, she has to choose. Either I have to pick from the the available pool, which may mean I'm, I'm gonna be with a guy whom I'm not, it's not really ideal, but I can have a child with him. Or she can go on her own. And I talk about reproductive technology in the book and how it gives this false premise of like, I think if people want to do IVF, they want to freeze their eggs, that's perfectly fine, that's their choice. But I think it's important for people to be aware of what do these technologies actually involve. The fact that they do not have a 100% success rate. And I think also young women are taught to ignore biology or that they can somehow override their biology, which is not true. And so this is what you have happening where women will get into, you know, their late 30s or into their even early 40s and be surprised when their fertility is not the same. Because they were aware of this and now now they're trying to find a partner. So this is where you see also in the culture where I think women get shamed for that. But I don't think it's necessarily their fault. It's like society's telling them you have all the time in the world. Starting at at teenage years when you're on the birth control pill and you're put on the pill, say for other reasons than being sexually active, you, you there's this illusion that women have as much time as they want. And then they get to this point where if they haven't found someone now, that single motherhood by choice is becoming more popular where women can, like I did as an experiment, you can go on the internet and buy, I didn't use it, but you can buy sperm on the internet and impregnate yourself and have a baby on your own. And so this is what I see happening that that both sexes are going to continue bifurcating. And instead of saying, hey, let's try to make things work and find solutions that are actually solving this problem of people not pairing up, we're seeing women going this direction of saying, we don't need men. In fact, having a boyfriend is embarrassing or whatever. And I'm going to have a baby on my own with technology. Embarrassing. And men are saying, I'm going to get me a sex robot and uh, be done with dating.
Having a boyfriend is not embarrassing. It is gay. It's very gay. It's terminally online, as you said. You saw that? I loved it. Yeah. Yeah. No, it's very gay to have a boyfriend these days. I, I think so. I mean, I mean that in a positive way, but.
But, you know, can I say something that I think would be encouraging because we're talking about a lot of things that are, you know, frankly discouraging, but we're honest. That's honesty is always better than non-honesty. But, uh, for all the women in in their 30s who are like, and I've just seen so many freakouts like, "Oh my god, I'm 30. Oh gosh, call 911. Really, I'm 70. Shut the [ __ ] up." And they're very hard. And they're and they're freaked out about this thing with about the. And what it is, as you said, the pool, the pool of people who are going to be attracted to you. When you go when you delve down into it because I think we often have thoughts and we del don't delve down why are we having these thoughts, why are you freaking out about 30? Okay, let's look at it. What it really is, is you are worried that this pool of prospective applicants to be your Easter egg soulmate that you find this perfect person that you're going to hook up, match up with and live happily ever after with, this pool is diminishing because you're getting older.
Now, I guess at some point that does happen, but I'm just here to tell you from a man talking to other men, okay, and as one with no dog in this fight, cuz never had kids, never been married. Okay, I know how men think about this and I know who they marry. So, if you're 30, don't worry about it. That's when it begins to be attractive for most successful men to even consider you. Because when they get married, they're not necessarily looking for the hottest chick they ever had. It's a life experience. They're looking for someone who's not going to be an [ __ ] every day. Not just, you know, just to be a [ __ ] nudge about every stupid thing. Somebody you can have a conversation with. Someone who, if you're stuck in the airport for four hours, is not going to be, "What is the plane gonna leave?" I don't know, [ __ ] I'm not the pilot either. Read a [ __ ] book. Okay? And that doesn't even begin in the 20s. Okay? So, calm down. You're just at the beginning of when the people who you might want to marry, uh, the successful, look up to people.
Now, the problem with that, you were talking about, you know, your sperm and or not your sperm and not my sperm, just sperm in general. Let's get that clear. Uh, but um, I've seen this happen a lot. The the women who are ready to marry in their 30s when their fertility isn't the greatest are marrying guys in their 50s. Cuz that's not like too old, right? But it's successful. Yeah. And it's like not a age gap that makes people go, "How dare.