Cultivating Herbal Habits for Lasting Change with Selima Harleston Lust

Welcome to the Virtual Herbalism Conference. I'm your host, Lindsey Feldpausch. In this session, I'm so excited to welcome Selima Harleston Lust. Selima is a Clinical Herbalist and Co-Founder of Iwilla Remedy, and she's one of our Lead Herbalist Educators here at the Herbal Academy, where she has contributed to a number of courses and teachings for The Herbarium, our vast database of herbal information.

In this conversation today on Cultivating Herbal Habits for Lasting Change, we are going to explore how small, consistent herbal practices can help anchor transformation over time, from the herbs that support daily balance to the mindset shifts that make new herbal practices sustainable. Selima will share her wisdom on how to weave herbalism into the daily rhythms of life. Selima, thank you for being here with us today.

Thank you. I'm happy to be back. This is exciting. Really excited for our conversation. It is going to be a good one. I am sure of that, Selima. Will you start off by telling us what it means to you to cultivate herbal habits for lasting change, personally and in your work with clients?

Yeah, that's great. That's a great way to kick it off. If you live enough life, I think that people realize that not much gets accomplished without some level of consistency. It's not that health is something to accomplish or a goal to meet or achieve, but I think that there's a continuum of our well-being, and we can always be moving in that direction. And so cultivating habits for lasting change in the direction of supporting my optimal well-being, for me means to some degree, taking the path of least resistance. And so I think about different... Everyone has a different lifestyle. Everyone has different routines, different habits. We're all consistent in some ways. And so when I'm thinking about myself or I'm thinking about a client, I'm thinking about what's my avenue in that's going to be the path of least resistance for you. My habit for myself is the path of least resistance for me. One of those habits is to make a daily mug. It's not even a mug. I mean, this is a whole tumbler of infusions because I know it can be overwhelming when people are reading about dosages and it says you need to drink 2-3 cups a day. So people might assume, well, I need to make 2-3 cups a day. And it's like, no, you can just make one and have the commitment be to finish it by the end of the day. And so anytime I'm working with someone, I'm listening closely to figure out what is my entry point so that it doesn't feel like there's too much resistance. Because there's always some path of least resistance where we can infuse herbs into the habits that they already have, the lifestyle that they're already living, where it doesn't feel like another huge task on the to-do list. I think this is one of the key components of being a successful clinical herbalist. If you have a client that shows up and you hand them 12 different things to do, you overwhelm them with expectations, then that feels unachievable and everybody walks away feeling overwhelmed. We definitely want to explore that path of least resistance with clients and ourselves for sure.

As herbalists, This herbal journey starts off with excitement, but the struggle with consistency is real, again, personally as well as for clients. What do you think leads to the sustainability of habits surrounding herbal practices?

I do think the ease of being able to insert something into your already established habits. I think sometimes I help people reframe when they say they're not consistent. I'm like, but we are. We show up to our professions. We show up for our children, for family members. There are ways in which everyone shows up consistently in their own lives every single day. And so this is an opportunity to say, can I just transfer a little bit of that energy that we're so easy to extend outward? Can we pour that back into yourself? And it's like when we really quantify how much time we have, how much time we do other things, do things for other people, it becomes something to reflect on when we are resistant to doing a little bit for ourselves that has a lasting impact. These things will make us feel better and more equipped to show up and support our families, all of the obligations that we tend to if we just spend a little bit of time for us. I think it becomes a much deeper conversation that people can reflect on. It's like, I can give this gift to myself.

Selima, I feel like that is such a huge insight. It does feel true, at least in my life experience. It's so much easier to show up for others than create lasting change in ourselves. I feel like what you were speaking towards of incorporating into our daily lives is that habit-stacking idea, right? We can bring something into a routine that's already there and established to support change. How do you define lasting change? Is this a shift in daily practice or is it mindset or a deeper alignment?

That's good. What comes to mind is that moment of lasting change is when we stop negotiating with ourselves. And this is when people really have to be aware of what they're thinking about and as they're thinking it, because we all have those moments where the excuses start to pour in. It's like, I've been good on my infusions every day, and then suddenly it's a Tuesday, and suddenly you don't have time. It's really paying attention to that internal conversation and that dialog, and to recognize that you're still negotiating with yourself on if this is something that you really want to integrate into your life and that you really want to embody. And it's okay to be in that season of negotiation. I think it's important to just recognize it because then when we can recognize it and when we're aware of how we allow other things to come in and take the place of the change and the habits that we're trying to reach for, then we can have a deeper conversation with ourselves and we can say, you know what? No, this is really important to me, and I'm going to push through this moment of negotiation where I would usually talk myself out of it, and now I'm going to talk myself into it. And that can go on. I think that the whole idea that it takes, I don't know, 30 days or 90 days to build a habit is BS. It takes as long as it takes for you to stop that mental negotiation. And once you've stopped, then you're locked in because you're not thinking about it anymore. You're not thinking about it anymore, it's already embodied, it's integrated, and it's like, then onto the next thing that you want to incorporate.

That feels so simple. It's like, okay, really? Just make the choice to no longer negotiate and habits become easy. I recently listened to someone speaking about habits and making change where they spoke to the sincerity of your intention. If you truly want to change or if there is a sincerity behind the motivation, it's easier. How do you feel like intention or the mindset influence the success of that habit or herbal routine?

Yeah, I think intention is at the heart of it. I think that people need to have a really strong and grounded intention that's rooted in themselves and not in someone else or in seeking validation. I think the reason why it has to be sincere, and I like that language, is because people will realize if you were doing it for someone else or because you wanted someone to see that you were doing it, whatever the reasons are, if it's outside of you, if it's not sincere, and let's say you accomplish it for a moment, you'll fall right back. You'll fall right back into the old ways because it wasn't sincere, because it wasn't about making a change because you feel like you need to make this change and you want to make this change because you want to see yourself grow and develop in a new way. It was because you wanted something outside of you. And that's never going to be fulfilling. At the end of the day, it's not going to be fulfilling. People might not notice or people may say for a moment, oh, great job. And then there's still going to be that emptiness inside. And so I think, too, sometimes an intention like, I'm going to do this for my kids. I think it can take people so far. But once it starts to get hard and you're negotiating again, there has to be something that is underneath there for you so that you keep going. And the ripple effect is that it does have an improvement on your relationships or whatever else people want to influence or make changes in their own life. It will have that ripple effect of good, but it has to start with you. And then I also think—I have a lot of thoughts about this. I also think that it helps us question our worthiness. Do we feel worthy and deserving of becoming the version of myself that I see in my mind's eye? Do we feel worthy and deserving of that? And so a lot gets uncovered, I think, when the intention isn't sincere. And if we can take some time and have some spaciousness to actually reflect on the why, why it wasn't sincere, strip away those layers. And I think people can actually get to a very sincere intention, and then they can move forward and sustain it.

That is so powerful. Selima, I feel like I can see a path being developed just from these few answers you've provided us already. I want to hear from you, how do you guide people to the path of choosing herbal practices that align with the intention and the sincerity of the practices they want to incorporate into their lifestyle rather than that idea of forcing a fit into a new routine?

Yeah, I think you have to listen really closely to people. I think that we have a really good advantage being herbalists, that we work on the fringes of health care, where people really have to volunteer to see us. They have to go through extra layers of effort to seek us out, to pay for our services because it's not usually insurance based. And so already in that, there's an opening that says there's some willingness because you're here. You wouldn't see me if you weren't open to some degree, and so I think I listen carefully for that. And usually people are at a stage, a high level of frustration because of what they're experiencing in their bodies and perhaps because of what they've experienced with our medical care system. So that openness and then that frustration, I think there's already some natural willpower. I'm willing to do the things that are required of me to transform my wellbeing, just to move towards the optimal end, wherever we are in that spectrum, move towards the more optimal end. I try to remember that, keep that rooted in the work of what they're telling me their intention is. And think about this is how far I know our work can go because I'm not going to make tea for you, you know. Willpower can get people so far. And so my goal is to try to get people where they feel that they're having a transformation. Because once you feel it, we can talk about herbs all day. But if people don't feel it and they don't have that story and they don't have that hope, then they'll stay where they are. But I'm like, once I know that they're feeling the shifts and it changes, then I know that they're going to keep going. At this point, I've forgotten the question. It's really how you guide people down the path to align the practice with their lifestyle rather than forcing it. I think that the thing that really struck true to me in what you're saying is the motivation has already been cultivated in even just getting to you. It's all about building that motivation. I don't know about you, Selima, but for me, in my clinical practice, I feel like it's always majority chronic degenerative illnesses. People are not feeling good, and that motivation, that push, is what we need to build on to create change.

I also want to add that I think there's always some re-education around expectations, too. Because people—and I know what it's like having experienced chronic pain, too, that it's just like, when you are in pain, the last thing you want to hear is that this is going to take a while. But it's true. I'm very visual, so I tend to also think about where people are on this spectrum of well-being and how much of a depleted state that they're in so that I can help them manage their expectations. An example of that, I had a client, she's literally been on antibiotics for years because of chronic UTIs, a daily antibiotic for years. Having that deep conversation, that truthful conversation about it's going to take a while because you're still on this antibiotic, and it's okay because it's what's keeping you somewhat stable. But no, understand the drawbacks of being on that and the effects that it has, the real effects it has had on your gut microbiome and on your total health, so it's going to take a while. And I think that also people sometimes... We know... Why we don't know as much about our bodies, and we know so much about so many other things that we get in primary and secondary education. It's ridiculous because if people really understood more of the physiology, then some of their expectations would be accurate in terms of when they should expect to feel change, expect to feel measurement of improvement. I think people... We don't feel red blood cells getting glycosylated with the sugar. We don't feel that. So as we're working on lowering your A1c, you're not necessarily going to feel that either. So there's this element of trusting that your body knows exactly what to do. And over time, you will start to feel the signs of improvement. I think that that brings forth the idea of education in regards to the shifts that herbs make versus pharmaceuticals, too. Because I think that we do have this society that is really looking towards, oh, I take a pill and I am better, which is typically not as realistic as it may sound.

Yeah, and the re-education around that. There has to be greater amounts of effort and energy put into shifting with herbs and lifestyle changes. Yeah, I think that brings up another point I was thinking when it comes to helping people make those changes, it's also recognizing you're going to have to do something differently. So there is a level of pushing, too. It's like, yes, we're going to find the path of least resistance, and we're going to work with what your lifestyle already dictates, but there is going to have to be an additional level of effort because we are creating change. You know what I mean? Change requires change. And so if people can get over—again, it's that mental negotiation—if people can get over the humps of this being hard. Everything that we do for the first time, for the first couple of times, it's hard, and then we grow accustomed to it. And so I think there is that level of, you do hard things every day. We really do. We do hard things every single day. And so I'm asking you to do something that's a little bit hard right now to remember to take these things today and every day. It's a little bit hard right now, but eventually it won't be hard. Just like the first time you were at this new job, it was hard. And it may have been hard for a year, but you did it. I believe we can do hard things, absolutely. But I also think that as herbalists, part of our goal is providing some practical and simple and approachable ways to incorporate herbs into our daily routines and reducing the overwhelm that can come along with that.

Selima, can you speak to some practical ways that you incorporate herbs into your lifestyle or your clients' lifestyles and what that looks like?

I am a tea girly, so I do. I make a daily infusion every day. I rarely miss a day. Even when we travel, I'll have it with me because I found that for me, that's the easiest way to make sure that I'm spending time with the plants, but also that I'm maintaining my well-being in the way that I want to feel, and I'm staying grounded and supported, and just have that support throughout the day. I think that there can also be a level of batching. I know exactly how long it takes me to make 100 capsules. So we make our own capsules. And capsule machines are easy to find now. So it makes 100 at a time. It takes me six minutes. So I know that if I put on the show or I put on an interview, I will just make the capsules that I know I'm going to want. It's thinking about how can I reduce the friction of when life gets busy? Because I know it's going to get busy, and I know there's going to be moments where I'm going to feel like I don't have the time to do this. But if it's already prepped and prepared, it's already ready, then I don't have that resistance. And so I may spend an afternoon. I just did it last weekend, spend an afternoon—not a whole afternoon, like an hour—making hundreds of capsules so that for the next 30 days, next 45 days, it's done. It's not something that I have to think about. I think when it comes to tinctures, if it's time to strain, I'll keep them. There's one by the night stand, there's one in the car, there's one in my bag so that it's within reach when I know that I want it and when I need it. I do think herbalism does teach us a lot about preparedness and how to have the preparations on hand when we need it. And so we're not scrambling. And I've been in those moments where I'm like, we have hundreds of plants downstairs, but they weren't in a preparation that I needed when our son had croup. It's just like, oh, right. The tincture should be made because also these smalls, that's an easier preparation or the syrup should be made. And that really just taught me a big lesson around just have it already prepared in the form that you like it and ready for when you need it so you can reach for it.

I absolutely love creating herbal products as well. I think that it is part of the maker side, that crafting, that kitchen herbalism that can feel like a really beautiful, nourishing thing that you're doing for your future self.

Yes, and it is. It is for the future self. It's like carrying an umbrella. It's cloudy, carry an umbrella in case it rains, where I feel like if I have my preparations ready, then they're right there when I need it. Not that I'm calling in illness, but it's like we're in human bodies that have limitations. When it's ready, it's right there. I feel like there are so many preparations that I've made, too, that I'm like, I don't know if I'm ever going to need this, but it's fun to make. It's like that wild lettuce tincture that took two days. Like, simmer it down, get the resin. And, you know, it's almost gone. So it's just like it's right there. I think that there's an intuitive level around that, too, when you start playing with plants and your intuition is saying, just go make this thing. Then before you know it, three months later, you need it. I've absolutely experienced that in my own life and apothecary, Selima.

I want to talk more about herbs. What particular herbs are you using to support consistency, motivation, self-awareness in building lasting habit changes?

But they all do that. They all do that. I think there's... You know what I'm working with right now, although not today? Linden. I've been drinking a lot of linden lately. It's so delicious. It really feels good on my nervous system since I let go of coffee. I had to let go of coffee, and so I feel like my nervous system is resetting in a way, and it feels really good. And linden has been really supportive to that. But I do think, I think all plants have so many different gifts that they can teach us. It's just that level of, I want to say, belief. I think if people can be open enough to think that there's more than a physical therapeutic benefit from working with a plant, then those gifts will start to rise to the surface for them, too. But I think the practice of working with them every day for me, that's a part of my spiritual practice as well. I don't know. I think that there's always something that people can learn. They all help in some way. I like to introduce nutritive tonics in that overnight infusion way, particularly nettle, as that guiding baseline herbal intervention for clients? Do you do anything like that? I think that I really rely on the tonics, the nutritives, especially when people are on a lot of medications, and it requires a lot a lot more research. It requires a lot more research to make sure that there's no herb-drug interactions. Then I think people can feel really good shifts when we support their nutrition with plants. I think that they'll feel their energy go up. I think they'll just start feeling relief without it feeling like a strong force on the body. Milky oats always screams out. I was fortunate enough to make maybe about three gallons of tincture and glycerite, and that's lasted a pretty long time. I'll often give people milky oats. And then burdock stands out a lot, too, for that grounding and that rooting and that clearing. You can warn people with burdock. It's like, well, you're going to feel some things. I don't want to say too much, but you're going to feel some things. You might feel some of that—I like that word biliousness, emotionally rising to the surface. Then it'll lighten, it'll clear. Tend to ask people about their relationships with anger before offering burdock, or we'll find out. I actually think of you with burdock, Selima, because of your burdock hot chocolate recipe that is so good.

Thank you. What do you think about developing a relationship with herbs and these building habit changes? Obviously, it's all about connection with the plant, right? Do you feel like this can help people stay consistent in their practice?

I think it can. I think that people, if they just view herbs as supplements, then it feels very sterile and very disconnected. But I think if we can open ourselves up to the idea that we can have a relationship with plants in the same way that we have with human friends and with animal friends, I think that just creates a door for deeper transformation. I think people only need one good experience. If you spend a concerted amount of time with a single plant, don't make any other changes. Just your own little experiment, your own little child, don't do anything else. We just work with one plant every day for two, three months. It's helpful if people journal. You can be your own documentarian in your own life. You can't help but notice shifts and changes that have to be attributed to your relationship that you're establishing with yourself. You're really deepening your relationship with yourself, with the plant as a guide is how I see it. And so I think when people have that one story that's deeply meaningful to them, then you're an herbalist. You know what I mean? You're a plant lover for life because you can never forget that. I can never forget my experiences when working with an individual plant at a time, just how much personal growth happened in that season. But I do, I definitely think that that enhances the work. But I also think this is where it goes back to the conversation that you're having with a person and really listening to what they're open to and what their belief system is. Because even if we're just viewing them, if a person is just viewing them as a supplement to support their physical well-being, it's like, okay, I'm going to let the plant take it from there. I'm going to let the plant take it from there. But usually, People feel enough of a shift, and they're like, oh, there's something here. There's something deeper here. Then there are lots of really amazing plants, like milky oats. I love to offer people mimosa that if they're really going through emotionally challenging times, you can't help but feel better using mimosa. Not too much. It makes me a little bit stimulated. I don't know about you, but I microdose mimosa, and it's just like, wow. That's amazing. I've had people who have never worked with plants before, and I've offered them a mimosa tincture, and they're like, okay, you're on to something. The first time I ever took mimosa flower, it was very early on in my days of studying herbalism, and I was in a mood. I just was not feeling it, like anything. My teacher offered me one drop of mimosa flower, and I felt like I had taken Felix Felicis, the potion from Harry Potter. It just immediately uplifted this beautiful state of acceptance and love. The flower is this uplifting, very ethereal, almost heady feeling, while the bark is more downward energy. It feels like it grounds you into your body, which can be uncomfortable for some people who don't live in their bodies, and I have seen that firsthand. But yeah, mimosa is just such a beautiful and powerful herb, and I love working with it. I absolutely think that it is one of the herbs that has helped me deepen my relationship to self, which is something that I loved that you just shared, Selima. That's such an important point to bring forth.

Yeah, that's what I think that the plants are helping us do. When I say plants helped me save my life, it's like they help me deepen my relationship with myself. They help me feel safe in my body. They help me slow down. They help me not feel like I have to do everything myself. I feel so deeply supported by whatever you want to call it, God, source, universe, be all, whatever. We don't make trees. There's something that unifies and connects us. And working with plants has deepened that so much. It's like, we are truly so supported. And when people learn about how much well-being is available to us through herbalism, that's mind-blowing. It's literally mind-blowing the number of plants that we have available to us that support us from head to toe, in and out, and they're right outside. I love that so much. I feel like you have really, obviously, shown a light on the ways that herbs can support positive, healthy changes in our lives. I really feel like the negotiation, like stop negotiating with yourself is such a key piece. I want to hear on the other end, when we fall off our routines, which life is a roller coaster. It happens. How do you encourage people to return to the practice without feeling that guilt or shame feeling of, oh, we fell off again?

Just let that go. It's like, I'm looking at the fall leaves, the leaves falling from the trees, and it's like, the tree is not yelling at the leaves. Nature has so many different kind of lessons for us when we observe it, too, that it's like, there's no guilt or shame from plants about needing to go dormant and honor their seasons and honor the shifts that need to be made. And so I follow up, too. I try to do weekly family infusions. So I'll make a half a gallon of infusion that we all drink throughout the week. And I'm on it. I'll be on it for like a year. And then, like, I don't feel like it anymore. And then it's just like, no, it's got to come back around. Just get back on it and make it. It's not... Because the friction isn't that the doing it is hard, it's the making the time to do it and remembering that when we're all drinking our infusions, the energy in the house is so much better. Everyone's mood is so much better. Sleep is so much better. Now he's in school, he doesn't come back with all the stuff. So I think it's really remembering how much support that we do get from these habits and these practices and thinking, I'm going to return to that. I'm going to return to that. Because sometimes, and then sometimes practices shift and change, and sometimes plants shift and change. Nettle was my homie pre-pregnancy—this was 10 years ago. I drank nettle every single day. And I don't know what shifted or changed, but after that, I was like, I can't rock with nettle as much anymore. And not being able to identify what happened other than my whole body changed because you give birth. Just that little thing. But there's also seasons like that, too, where a plant is just ebbing and flowing with your particular season. So I think we just have to extend ourselves grace and remember that the trees are not beating up the leaves for falling.

That's really a beautiful way to put that, Selima. So next time I'm feeling that feeling, of like, ugh, I'm going to think about the trees and the leaves. But the whole thing is that we're trying to build lasting change to cultivate wellness for ourselves. And we are tracking that progress. In our days, in our diaries, in our lives. So what ways do you see that lasting change is being measured through progress and these habit changes and shifts?

I think the biggest way that's probably more subtle is actually our responses, our daily reactions and our daily responses. If we would tend to be in a situation and want to cuss them out, and we don't, it's huge. Even not having the feeling of wanting to tell a person about themselves, that is improvement. That is a shift in change. I think people really need to pay attention to their responses and if they're feeling less reactive. But some of the things that I do, especially when I'm negotiating on a habit change, I keep a whiteboard calendar. And Tammy and I both do. In our bedroom, she has one, I have one, and we'll write down—while I'm building the habit—I will write down every day this is what I did. Because I know that if I don't write it down, well, I didn't do it. Because I'm honest with myself. I'm honest with myself, so I will view that. I'm like, No. So while I'm in that negotiation where it's not really embodied yet, I will use that as a self-accountability tool. And then overall, people can measure progress. You really have to tune in with your body. Do you feel less slow? Do you feel more energy? How is your sleep? You can also write down how you feel along with that calendar as well. But for me, I needed the whiteboard calendar because I needed to see it. So it's like I open my eyes and there it is. And if I haven't written it, then I haven't done it. And then that's my internal motivation to get back into it because you said this is important to you. And I know my why. I know why this is important to me. So just get back and do it. The times in my life where I have cultivated great change, it has always been through accountability with writing, where it's keeping track. It's a big deal because it recommits you every time you're writing, every time you're checking off that box. Did I exercise today? It's huge.

I also think that these consistent herbal or just lifestyle shifts or practices that we cultivate uncover some of the emotional imbalances that are at the root cause of the original issues. Do you see that, Selima?

Yeah, it's true. I see this a lot. It's in my belief system, because everyone may not agree, and that's totally fine, because we don't all need to believe the same thing. But I do think that there is a resonance with that internal conversation and our physical well-being. And what are we holding internally? What is our inner dialog and illnesses expressing that or the physical body expressing how we deeply feel inside? And so I think that a part lot of people's healing journey, mine included, is I'm going to do all of the outside things. I'm going to work on working out. I'm going to eat better. I'm going to develop a meditation practice. I'm going to work inside out, and I'm going to try to support myself on a physical level, which I really think is important because it helps to strengthen us and helps us find some level of relief from pain where we can then do the deeper work. I've felt, and I could just talk about myself, my own healing journey where it's like I did all the external things, and herbalism was a huge part of that as well. But I really think that they softened me to do that inner work while I was physically strengthening my body because I would not have been able to contend with the childhood work that I needed to do without both, but I find that naturally the inner work becomes the next step. We're doing all the right things. We're doing all the right things, and we are feeling some improvement, but we still don't feel peace. We still don't have peace. We don't feel like we can access joy. Then the next invitation, the next door to walk through is that whatever is weighing our hearts down. I think plants are really amazing allies for that, especially if we've already done so much to support our physical bodies, and we have developed some healthier habits in terms of food and lifestyle, and we have our herbal practice, the next right thing is to get the inside right. And that's when I really see people experience shifts in their well-being, where they're having more honest conversations with themselves because they have the strength to, and they have the spaciousness to, as well. So sometimes the first step is, I know that in working with someone, I know you need relief, or I know you are extremely fatigued at levels that people can't even fathom. So I know you need more energy, but at some point we are going to have to do—this is going to come up, that inner healing work is going to come up, too. So I just try to meet people where they are, meet people where they are, but knowing the inner work is coming right around the bend. But if you've already done so much to strengthen and support yourself, then you're ready for it. And then I see myself as a part of a care team. So I'm not a therapist. I do do a lot of work with people, but the larger part of the team does need to be when that trauma, when those emotional wounds rise to the surface, you do need to have someone on your team to help you navigate that as well.

I think that's really important, Selima, the strengthening of the physical body to offer that inner work, because I think the inner work without it being done, that's where resistance and self-sabotage comes from when we're trying to make these changes.

Yeah, I think that's such a really good point because I remember watching a movie—I'm not going to remember the name of it, but it was about a swimmer. And in the movie, I remember that it depicted through flashbacks of this swimmer's childhood trauma rising to the surface. And it was like, that was the thing that was holding her back from accomplishing this massive feat that she wanted to do with swimming. And I thought that it just depicted real life really well, how there's always going to be these subconscious—until they're conscious—subconscious records. My wife calls them underthoughts. We can just think about the stories. And I like using the word story here because we can change it. Whatever in our backgrounds or our childhoods or however we learn to perceive ourselves or to think about ourselves, whatever shaped that, whatever those first records were, they're an undercurrent for our everyday current lives. And they can have a real profound impact on whether or not we become who we know we can become. And so until we tend to that, and it requires some slowing down, it might require our support from additional people so that we learn how to self-reflect, learn how to navigate emotions, learn how to feel safe inside of our bodies, safe with new emotions without bypassing to other ones. It's really an internal process, but there's so much help and support all over for being able to do this inner work. But when we really become aware of those underthoughts—those subconscious beliefs that we hold about ourselves—then we can change them. Then we can make a direct connection to, oh, this is what I think about me because of what happened or because of circumstances. And then, and this is why I behave the way I do. Now I'm aware. So the next time I'm in a particular situation that would trigger this default pattern, I can change it. I can choose in that moment to have a different reaction or have a different response. But I think until people do that inner healing work, it's always going to feel like I don't know, just very reactionary and not very intentional behavior that, to what you said earlier, that's in alignment with your future self, who you know you can become, regardless of what life may have shown you or told you before. Because it's just a story that can change.

I love that you brought up story. I feel like that is such a huge component of shifting our lives. Dev psychology is something that I am a fan of when it's utilizing story, basically the story of your life and sometimes interweaving mythology or fairy tales, just basically the story of these archetypes that we can see ourselves in to cultivate change or to develop strength. But really shifting that story is such a huge part. I do feel like herbs, even on a cellular level, can help us shift the story of our lives. I feel like people think, probably, we sound crazy for saying that, right? But it's true. And that's where it goes back to, it's like, you just need that one experience with a plant. And then you'll completely understand what we're talking about. I have a John the Conqueror root right here that I always have when I'm doing speaking engagements or talking, and it's like, it offers me strength. Even just in the name, but also knowing the lore behind it. It offers me strength, and so I keep it nearby. But I think people just have to be open enough to allow a shift like that and sometimes—well, not sometimes, all the time—think that plants, developing a relationship with plants is safer than developing relationships with other humans. That is especially because all of our wounds, our whole experience is relational. So all of our wounds come at the hands of other people. So if we want to be less reactionary, we want to establish a sense of belonging with other humans, if we want to to build up more trust, all the things that we want are also going to require us to be interacting with humans. So I think plants do a really good job at helping us remember our safety again, and that that safety really comes inside. And when I trust self, I feel like I'm operating within integrity within myself. I can trust my intuition, I can trust my body's responses when I'm in interactions, I can trust that inner voice, then we don't have to worry so much about other people because we trust ourselves and how we will interact and how we'll show up in those dynamics. Plants do a really good job with that.

I love that. I think that trust is such a huge component. And literally, plants, phytomolecularly, they interact with our cells, they shift our DNA. They have not only this science-based determinable impacts, but they do have the energetic side, too. I mean that energetically, more so the energies that the plants hold that they can imprint onto us. Rose is for love for a reason, because rose holds the capacity for love. It has something that has been utilized and the story told of rose for hundreds of years, thousands. We look back to the ancient egyptians and the utilization of rose. I mean, it is there for a reason. So the story about plants and the stories that we tell ourselves, it's all intertwined. I think that it's such a beautiful way to work with plants. I think when people start diving into this, too, and they start reading the different emotional experiences that people have with plants, to your point, there's a reason why we all have similar experiences with a particular plant. And I remember we collectively, inside of my Herbal Medicine for the Soul Course, decided to work with tulsi. And it was on purpose of, like, don't do any research, don't do any research. Let's just all work with it for a month. And it was so delightful and surprising—surprising, but not really, but really delightful to hear that everyone had similar experiences and the emotional shifts that took place. It's just like, what is that? Of course, there's consciousness, but there's consciousness in everything that is alive, and plants are alive. I believe that that recognition can help us to believe in the ability for plants to help us make lasting changes in our life.

Selima, my final question for you is, do you have one herbal practice that has been transformative for you? I know you've talked a lot about your tea and your infusion, so that might be it. But I would love for you to speak a little bit towards this embodied lasting change in herbal practice in your own life.

Yeah, of course, it is my daily infusion. But also what came to mind is I'll meditate with plants. There's an exercise, I call it guided writing. I got that from my spiritual mentor, where you get into your calm state and just have a pen and paper, pencil and paper ready, and I will sit with the plant in my hands. Maybe it'll be kind of like Q&A. I'm asking a question and just writing down. It's just stream of conscious, whatever comes out and really trusting that. And I think that's a really beautiful connection that we can make with individual plants. You really have to be non-judgmental. It depends on people's senses. You can hear a voice from it. I think it just helps me feel supported. It helps me feel like I'm not alone because none of us are alone. But sometimes our human experience, even though there's eight billion people on the planet, sometimes our human experience can make us feel like we are alone and that we don't have a sense of belonging or community or no one understands what we're going through, even though we really all are very similar. I think knowing that there's this support in other realms is really helpful for me to show up in this one. That's so Piscean to say, too. Talking about different realms, but the plant realm really helps me feel grounded in my humanity. It helps me feel more compassionate for people too, and I think having direct messages or direct conversations with plants is just a tender way to experience them.

That's beautiful, Selima. I feel like we are all here because herbalism has greatly impacted and shifted our lives. We wouldn't be sitting here having this conversation. Our listeners would not be here diving into this beautiful topic with us if it was not the case. I think we're in good company there. Selima, I'm so grateful for this talk you have provided us today. Can you tell our audience where they can find you out in the world and learn more from you and the work that you do?

Yeah. IwillaRemedy. Com is our website, and @iwillaremedy on all of the platforms. We're really ramping up our YouTube, so go subscribe on our YouTube channel, which is @iwillaremedy. People, they can set up free calls if they ever want to connect with me just to ask questions or to figure out the different types of programs that I offer. I always let people sign up for a free call. We can see if we vibe. Got to do a vibe check. You can reach out in the DM. Sometimes I miss them, so it's never personal, but I'm pretty accessible.

I will also put in a plug for all of the amazing teachings that you have provided in various Herbal Academy courses, as well as The Herbarium. You have done some really incredible teachings. I know you're part of our Kids Course. You just were cultivating The Menopause Intensive in The Herbarium. Are there any other courses, Selima, that you want to share about your work?

The kids course, menopause, which is amazing. They're all amazing. And the oils course.

Thank you again, Selima. This has been so much fun. I always love listening to your wisdom shares, and I'm grateful for your time and teachings today.

Thank you. This was a lot of fun. Thank you so much for having me.