Taming the Alpha | A Thrilling Werewolf Shifter Romance Audiobook

Prologue.

I killed my mother. Inadvertently, of course. I'm not a monster. My mother died shortly after giving birth to me. As per my gift given to me by the moon goddess, I drained the life out of her as I took my first breath. I was given the gift of black magic. Magic means I can manipulate the physical world around me in various ways. Black means that I have to drain energy from other life forms to have the power to make the magic work. What should have been a blessing was a curse.

Not only did I drain the life out of my mother while she birthed me, but my father lost the will to live shortly after his mate perished. My gift didn't resurface for six more years after the death of my mother. At the time, my mother's death was attributed to natural causes. People die, it happens, and the rest of the pack moved on with their lives. My grandmother assumed responsibility for me and took care of me in our pack, Crimson Shadow.

6 years after my cursed birth, I was playing with the alpha son, the future alpha of Crimson Shadow, Kilmore. We were playing tag, and I was it. He was fast, and as an unranked wolf, I was unable to keep up with him. I reached an arm out to him, willing him to slow down. I suddenly felt a massive influx of power. It ran through my blood like electricity, cackling and begging to be exerted onto something. My own fascination with the feeling was quickly replaced with fear as I heard the young alpha cry out in pain. To my shock, his arm had blackened and withered right in front of my eyes. I screamed as did he.

Traumatic story short, the alpha blamed me for his son's missing arm and kicked me out of the pack, stating that I was too much of a hazard to be allowed around the pack members. At 6 years old, I became a rebel. Luckily, my grandmother didn't hesitate to leave the pack with me, abandoning everything she had ever known.

That same grandmother, 10 years later, is currently on her deathbed. Sitting at her side on a chair next to the bed, I held her hand as she lay peacefully on the bed, a small smile playing on her face. "It's time, Nyx," my grandmother gently said, stroking my hand with her thumb in an affectionate gesture. Tears filled my eyes. You could hold on a little bit longer, Grahams. I pleaded with her helplessly. She smiled sadly and shook her head weakly. I have been waiting for this day since your grandfather passed away two decades ago. I'm sick and weak. The moon goddess is calling to me. I can feel it. You sound crazy, Grahams. I informed her honestly, tears spilling out of my eyes. That's because I am child. Her tone was playful, even though her hands were shaking slightly. It's my time to join my mate and my daughter. I sobbed, not caring how petulant I sounded. I don't know what to do without you. I'll be so lonely, I begged her to see it from my point of view. Graham smiled gently at me, always keeping her spirits up, no matter the situation. Even on her deathbed, she held no anger or negativity. You'll find your mate someday, child. You'll never know loneliness after that. Her gaze grew distant as she recalled memories of my grandfather. She had told me so many stories from when they were young. They had met when they were both 17, and it was love at first sight.

I made one last attempt to change her mind. I can use my gift to heal you, GS. I can go drain the life from a few trees, and we can try. Her stern voice interrupted me. Ona, you have no business meddling in the natural circle of life. Dying from old age is not the worst way to go. You know, she said her spirits lifted. She was excited to be reunited with her family. Then let the old age naturally take your life. Why do I have to be the one to end it? I begged, not wanting to drain the life out of the woman who raised me. I'm in pain, Onixa. I would like to go peacefully on my own terms. Her eyes turned glossy, even though the small smile never left her face. When you meet your mate, you will understand the compulsion to follow them wherever they go, even if it's into the dark. My face scrunched up, but I didn't respond. Who was I to argue with a woman on her deathbed? It's time, Nyx. Do not worry, child. I wouldn't be leaving you if I didn't know you would be okay. She stroked the side of my face gently with her wrinkled hand as she wisely spoke. I nodded, accepting defeat. I didn't see her reasoning, but I couldn't deny her dying wish. I threw my arms around her, making her chuckle. My tears wetted her gray hair as my face burrowed into her neck. Be strong, Nyx, through everything you will endure. Always be strong. More importantly, be kind. It is the only thing that doesn't make us complete beasts. Despite what you may think about your gift, I know you are blessed by the moon goddess and are pure at heart. Don't ever let your soul turn rotten, she advised me, and I pulled away, nodding. I would remember those words for as long as I live. Goodbye, Grams, I whispered, pain clouding my voice. Her smile didn't falter. It's not goodbye forever, child. Just for now. I will see you again sooner than you think. Her tone was ominous, but I ignored it, knowing that it was just crazy lady on her deathbed talk. "When I die, use the power you withdrew to turn me into a cherry tree seed." She requested, and I nodded, unquestioning. As wise as she is, she is also quite unusual. Do not despair, child. Returning to my Edmmond is all I have desired for years. You are giving me the greatest gift. She wiped the tears from my cheeks. I was too choked up to speak, so I nodded once again. I kissed her forehead and she closed her eyes, smiling slightly. I held my hand over her heart and drained the life from it, causing a rush of power to wash over my body. Anytime I took the life force of something, it ran through my body powerfully. She took her last breath and I never had more energy running through me. Following her request, I used my magic to turn her into a cherry tree seed. I waved my hand over her body expertly, black fog expelling from my hands as I did so, physical evidence of my magic taking effect. Soon, her body was replaced by a tiny seed. I planted it outside of the cabin we had resided in for the last decade. I watered it every day without fail. That is, I did until the day I met my mate.

Chapter 1.

I'm right here, Nyx. What are you blind? Gradon teased me, making me roll my eyes. No, but you're invisible, I retorted. He loved using his gift to annoy me. We were currently engaged in a battle of chip throwing, and he was being a cheater. It's not my fault you're too much of a coward to use your gift. Gradon smirked as she reappeared next to me and crumbled a Dorito on top of my head. I shrieked and tried hitting him, but he effortlessly dodged me, popping a chip into his mouth this time as opposed to my hair. I am not a coward. I grumbled at him as I tried getting the Dorito residue out of my hair. I just don't see the point in taking the life out of some poor plant just so I can throw a chip at you. You're really immature. You know that. Gradon shrugged, eating another chip. Don't start something you can't finish, babe. I rolled my eyes.

I met Gray about three months after my grandmother's death. To be more precise, I almost took him down about 3 months ago after my grandmother's death. He is also a rogue and was wandering through the woods when he came upon my cabin. He hadn't known I was home and came barging in like he owned the place. I was upstairs when I heard him enter, and I had drained the life from a poor nearby succulent so I could have the energy to hurt the intruder. I didn't ever want to kill a rogue, so I typically just used enough magic to knock them out and then move their unconscious forms far away. Even though I had heard someone enter the house, I was surprised when I didn't see anyone. I could, however, smell another wolf scent. What are the odds that the first cabin in the forest I break into belongs to the prettiest rogue I've ever seen? I heard the deep voice from behind me and spun around. Nobody was there. I twisted my hands in a circular motion, using the succulents life force to generate an energy ball. I threw it in the general direction from which I heard the voice and luckily I hit the intruder square in the chest. A. The man suddenly appeared and collapsed on the floor as he took the full force of the photon blast. "Okay, okay, I surrender, freaky witch lady. I'll gladly exit the residence and will never return." He promised, and I narrowed my eyes at him, unsure if I could trust him or not. I was way too trusting of a person, and I let the stranger leave after he promised that he would never return. He showed up at my door the next day.

Ever since that day four years ago, we've been best friends. He moved into the cabin and was technologically skilled enough to set up a TV that had all sorts of shows I had never been exposed to before. Gradon loved being able to teach me things about life, society, packs, and everything. He was 20 at the time and had turned rogue once his former alpha started running the pack in a way he didn't respect. I tried to ask him more about it, but he didn't like talking much about his old pack.

I was yanked out of my flashbacks when Gradon threw yet another Dorito at me. I tried to dodge it but failed, getting hit with it square in the eye. "Ouch!" I yelled as I clutched my eye. It didn't actually hurt, but I knew it would activate Gradon's natural protective instincts over me. "Ny, I'm sorry. Let me see." Gray rushed towards me in panic, and when he was close enough, I grabbed the bag from his hands and dumped the whole thing on top of his head. Gradon growled in annoyance as orange powder covered his head, shoulders, and face. You pretend to be innocent, but you're just as manipulative as everybody else, you little minks." I laughed as I took in the side of him. Even in Dorito residue, he looked as attractive as ever. With his dirty blonde hair and tan muscles, I wasn't sure anything could make him unappealing. Suddenly, his usually hazel eyes darkened. He took one step towards me, his eyes blazing in an emotion I didn't recognize. My breath hitched in my throat. I'm going to go shower, he muttered and stalked into his room, making me shrug. Don't start something you can't finish. I sang out mockingly after him, mimicking his earlier words. He snarled at me in response, closing the door behind him. Jeez, he was so worked up over Doritos. I followed his lead and went to take a shower myself so I could wash the cheddar dust out of my hair. Once I finished showering, I got dressed in jean shorts and a white strapless top. I brushed my wet hair as I stared at my somewhat fogged reflection in the mirror. My electric blue eyes stood out against my pale skin and my dark black hair. A few freckles littered my nose and upper cheeks half-hazardly. Hey Nyx, let's go into town tonight. Yeah, there's something I want to talk to you about. Gray's voice called out from behind my bedroom door. "Okay," I yelled back, even though I didn't know what he possibly wanted to talk to me about. There wasn't a single thing I didn't know about him. I wasn't going to argue, though. I loved going into the human towns. They were always brimming with vitality and excitement. It was also one of the only times I got to interact with other people besides Gradon. It was lonely at times living as a rogue. I put tan sandals on and went downstairs to where Gray was waiting. He wore a white t-shirt and casual jeans, looking effortlessly attractive. My eyes went over his form appreciatively. "My eyes are up here, Nicks gray teased, making my cheeks flush. I was merely admiring what a good job the moon goddess did at giving you the gift of extreme ugliness," I retorted, smirking. "Your sense says otherwise, little wolf." Gray's voice deepened and I cocked my head. "What do you mean?" I asked confused. Gray chuckled lowly. "You have a lot to learn, Nyx?" I rolled my eyes. "I'm 20 now. I'm not a kid, you know," I whed, sounding not very grown up at all. "I know," he whispered, his eyes darkening as he looked me over. "Nick's eyes suddenly, his head jerked up." "Somebody is here." I frowned. I didn't hear anything. I could only smell the delicious scent of vanilla and pine. Rogues? I asked, alerted. His face was confused as he strained to listen. I don't think so. There's someone yelling out orders, and rogues don't take orders. My heart fell. It had to be a group of wolves from a pack, meaning they would likely harm us. We need to leave now. Gray grabbed my hand and I jerked it away. No, I'm not leaving here. I stubbornly told him. This cabin was significant to me. My grandmother was literally growing right outside. Onixa, we're leaving. He snarled at me, daring me to challenge him. I sighed, but relented. I wasn't really an argumentative person, and he had never led me astray before. I grabbed the hand he outstretched to me, and we headed for the back door. "No," he whispered. "You're going to need to summon as much energy as you can if we want to get out of here alive." I nodded, even though I didn't know what he was referring to. It must have been a decent number of wolves if he was scared. We had taken on a few groups of rogues together before, and he always did so without hesitation or fear. He was a strong wolf, and he loved to release his aggression on other wolves. I never took a life during those encounters, but Gradon always finished the fight. Sigh men. We stepped out of the house, and I gasped when I saw that about 20 wolves had us surrounded. Should we take care of them, Alpha? A muscular man turned to another man, presumably the alpha, and asked for his permission. I looked at the man who was deciding our fate, and I was shocked when I met brilliant green eyes, so bright that they shocked me to my core. The green eyes were attached to a tall, muscular man with brown hair and tanned skin. He was without a doubt the most attractive person I had ever seen in my whole life. I took a step towards him out of instinct, not understanding why I felt so drawn to him. The delicious scent swirled around me. The greeneyed man smirked knowingly when I took the step towards him. It felt like I was possessed. Gray grabbed my wrist and hissed at me. What do you think you're doing, Nyx? She's coming to her mate. The man arrogantly spoke victoriously smirking and outstretching his arms. Presumably for me to go into mate. Gradon roared. "Oh no, chapter 2." "Did I stutter, pup?" the man asked rhetorically, his voice dripping in annoyance. "Yes, my mate." as in, "If you don't take your hands off of my mate, I will end you where you stand." The man's tone was casual, and his face almost looked bored, if not slightly irritated, that he had to deal with the minor inconvenience. Gradon ground his teeth. "She's not going anywhere with you, Brute." Nevertheless, Gray released my wrist, but stood in front of me protectively, sinking into a fighting stance. His eyes were dark, and I had only seen him this angry a few other times while facing off against other rogues. The man raised an eyebrow, seeming almost amused. "You dare to challenge an alpha pup?" Grdon snarled at being called a pup. It must have been a derogatory term to wolves, because I could see that it only fueled his fury. My stomach turned at the man's words. An alpha, just like the alpha that had kicked me out of the pack 14 years ago. The man turned his gaze onto me, suddenly piercing his eyes into my soul with concern. You're distressing my mate, pup. If the next step you take isn't away from her, it will be the last step you ever take. The alpha promised, never removing his gaze from mine. His attitude was so blasé, it almost scared me more than if you were livid and seething. I'm not scared of you. Gray spoke calmly and his body shook as he resisted the urge to shift into his wolf. The alpha smiled emotionlessly. You should be. With that, the apathetic alpha began walking towards Gradon and me. I stood too frozen to move or react. Gradon, however, was more than ready for the alpha's advancements towards us. He snarled and shifted into his wolf. Gradon was huge for an unranked wolf, at least from what I had seen when we came across other rogues. The alpha grinned evily, seemingly pleased that he successfully baited Gradon into shifting. He continued walking towards the wolf as his men hung back. I suspected he gave them the order not to interfere. The alpha was still wearing his black slacks and a navy blue button-up, and he even rolled the sleeves up so that they were just underneath his elbow. Why wasn't he shifting? Stop! I cried out as they nearly collided, finally finding my voice. They both hesitated before turning towards me. "Please don't hurt each other," I begged, not wanting to witness any conflict. The alpha spoke up first. He challenged me, little one. "I will deal with him quickly out of respect for you." My mouth dropped open. "He wouldn't actually harm Gradon, would he? How aggressive do these alphas actually get?" "Please don't," I whimpered, my voice cracking. As strong as Gray is, he was no match for an alpha. For the first time, I thought I saw an emotion in the alpha's eyes. Pity. Oh, little one. There's so much you have to learn about Pax. His tone wasn't condescending or patronizing, simply speaking his words as fact. Gradon snarled, making me break eye contact with the alpha. You see, love, he wants to be put in his place for you, and I'm happy to oblige. I'm nothing if not reasonable. the alpha drilly said, and a few of his men's mouths quirked up into a smile. They appreciated their alpha's strange sense of humor. Nobody is getting hurt today, I harshly responded, my voice strengthening with resolve, his perfect eyebrow raised, as did a corner of his mouth as he gave me a crooked smile. Feisty, I like it. Unfortunately, I'm still going to deal with your little boyfriend. At his words, I lifted my arms from my sides, extracting energy from all of the surrounding grass. Knowing I would need way more of an energy bank for what I had planned, I also took the life force of a few nearby trees. Even though they can't really feel emotions like humans, I always feel guilty for taking from them for my own selfish purposes. The influx of energy was so great that my body was levitating as black energy coursed through my veins, urging me to expel it. I hovered about 6 ft off the ground, my arms still raised at my sides, and felt the energy cackling all around me. The alpha's men looked at me in shock, their mouth agape, while the alpha looked pleased. Not letting myself dissect the nuances behind the alpha's visage, I released all of the energy in the form of a thick black fog, obscuring the vision of all of the parties involved. I dashed in the opposite direction into the woods, hoping that Gradon would act quickly and follow. He knew these parts better than the alpha and his men. I was sure of it. As I sprinted into the woods, I looked backwards occasionally to see if Gradon was close behind. Suddenly, I was yanked behind a tree. I yelped, but exhaled when suddenly Gradon appeared. Nyx, you scared me. I didn't know if you followed. I struggled to catch my breath. Partially from the running and partially because he scared the life out of me. Onixa, you can't go back with that alpha. He's bad news. His cousin is the blood alpha. Gradon insisted, panic lacing his tone. My mouth dropped open as I gasped. The blood alpha was known for leaving brutal warnings for any rogues who crossed into his territory. All rogues knew to stay away from Bloodlake territory and away from the unclaimed territory around Red Crescent, where the Reaper was known to be active, even though he hadn't been seen for almost a year. Many rogues were terrified that the cloaked figure would reappear and start taking out rogues at alarming rates again. Just because his cousin is bad doesn't mean that he's like that. I frowned at Gradon. Yes, it does. And if you weren't so naive, you would see that. Gradon snapped at me. I blinked back tears as I stepped back, pulling my hand away from Gradon. His face instantly softened. "Hey, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. I just don't want you to get hurt, Nyx. You haven't been in a pack in almost 15 years. You don't know what kind of messed up stuff happens in them." I glared back at him. We rarely fought, but when we did, the fights were intense. I'm not a kid. Great on. You don't get to choose what I do or who I do it with. Ona, I'm trying to protect you. You have no idea what kind of sick, demented things packs do. And alphas are the worst of them all. The blood alpha harmed his mate so badly she went into a coma. By the end of his tirade, he was shouting. I winced at his words. He is not his cousin. He could be better. Gradon shook his head in disgust. Theren and Cayenne are cursed. Misfortune follows them everywhere. Tears pulled in my eyes. Like me, I choked out. His eyes widened in realization at what he said. "No, Nyx, that's not what I meant. I was Jew." "Stop," I whispered. "I need to be alone. Don't follow me." I retreated away from him, sprinting deeper into the forest. I wasn't worried about the alpha and his men finding Gradon. He could always turn invisible and escape. I wondered why he didn't do that when they first came and why he felt the need to challenge the alpha. The forest was utterly silent, and I was thankful to be alone with my thoughts. Grahams had always insisted that I would be so full of joy once I found my mate, but all I felt was anxiety over what was to come. My mate seemed so mysterious, as if he had no emotions, and that scared me. I'm an emotional person and I don't know what I'm supposed to do with a mate that has as many emotions as a slice of bread. Not only that, but I cringed when thinking of how he was related to the blood alpha. Despite defending him to Gradon, I was concerned that he may have been right. How could someone be about such a monster be good? Would he hurt me just as Grayon claimed the blood alpha hurt his mate? Come here often? A recognizable bored tone suddenly filled my ears. I cringed as I turned to face my mate, the alpha.

Chapter 3.

The alpha was leaning against a tree, his arms folded across his chest. His eyes lazily went over my form, making me feel acutely aware of the fact that I was only wearing shorts and a strapless shirt. His eyebrows raised in amusement. "Do you talk?" he asked sarcastically. "Yes, I talk," I spat back at him. "I'm not an imbecile." His mouth widened into a grin at my words. "Cute attitude, little one, but I'm afraid it's time for you to come back with me." "No," I immediately responded and took a step back. "No," he questioned in amusement, his crooked grin only getting bigger. "I'm not going with you, I firmly told him. We were both adults here. I was sure we could reasonably discuss this." The alpha laughed. As entertaining as this has been, and trust me when I say it has been very entertaining, I'm bringing you back with me to my pack. I took another step back, but this time he unpropped himself off the tree and took a step closer. I wasn't asking, little one. And I wasn't asking for permission, big one. I mockingly threw back in his face. His eyes flashed dangerously, making my heart stop in my chest. No, you weren't," he mused, watching me like a predator, focusing on its prey. "But regardless, you're coming with me. We can work out the details later, but this part is non-negotiable." "You don't want to do this," I warned him as he took another step towards me. "I don't want to hurt you." I could hear the pleading in my own voice. Surprisingly, the alpha laughed. "You couldn't hurt me if you tried, love." I narrowed my eyes at him. What an arrogant man. I would show him exactly just how much I can and will hurt him. I extracted energy from a nearby tree, leaving it decaying. I rolled it into a black energy blast and launched it at him. To my surprise, instead of hitting him squarely in the stomach, he merely waved his hand, and a white veil of some kind blocked the energy, making it disperse upon contact. "What was that?" I demanded and withdrew more energy from surrounding plants. The alpha grinned, amused by the situation. Your gift is cute, little one. Powerful, even. Unfortunately, you haven't been alive long enough, nor practiced enough for it to outmatch mine. My eyes widened. What was his gift? I rolled the energy into another ball. To my surprise, he mimicked my actions, but his movements created a whitish ball. Apart from the colors, the other difference was that I had to generate energy by withdrawing it from other life sources whereas he could create it. I told you little one, you're not well practiced enough. Don't fret. I can help train you. He grinned victoriously as he sent the ball at me and I flinched, expecting it to knock me out. Shockingly, the ball dispersed as it was about to hit me, and the fog wrapped around me like a blanket. I tried moving, but it held me back. TSK, tsk, tsk. The alpha smirked at me as he approached me. My efforts to escape were feudal. I couldn't even move my arms enough to withdraw energy from something. I told you I wasn't asking love. My eyes widened as the fog suddenly shifted, concentrating around my wrists like handcuffs. Thankfully, I could now move my legs at least. When I tried stepping back, the alpha was next to me in lightning speed. How is it possible to move that fast? If you stop squirming, I can release the restraints. The alpha promised, but the glint in his eyes was so wicked. I knew he was in complete control. I nodded, knowing I was too scared of him to try running again. His mouth curled into a beused smile, but the foggy restraints dissipated as promised. Thank you, I muttered, looking down, careful to avoid his piercing eyes. Suddenly, he burst out laughing. I stared at him in confusion. What was wrong with this man? I restrain you, and you're thanking me. I shrugged. You were the one who took them off. His lips quirked up in an amused grin as he suddenly reached over and picked me up, cradling me in his arms. "You're so plackable and timid, little one," I scoffed. "I am no such thing. I really was, though. It wasn't in me to be aggressive or doineering. I assume it has to do with the guilt I live with every day. The alpha shrugged. No need to be defensive, love. It's adorable. It certainly pleases my wolf greatly. Why didn't you shift earlier with greaton? I suddenly asked him. Surprisingly, his usually calm demeanor hardened. I could have handled him with my bare hands. I didn't need to shift into my wolf. He's an unranked rogue. likely never trained properly. I'm an alpha and have trained my whole life to be one. Not only that, but it's wired in my DNA. I come from a long line of alphas. My heart quickened at his mention of being related to alphas. The blood alpha, I whispered. The alpha nodded in confirmation, continuing to walk us through the woods. I wanted to walk myself, but I was too scared to contradict him. I am related to him. Yes, our mothers were twins. Are you close with him? I asked quietly, my heart beating fast, as I hoped he would say now. Yes, immensely. Both him and his mate are very dear to me. The alpha responded as he got a far away look in his eyes. My heart quickened once more, and I was positive it would leap out of my chest at any minute. Little one, are you all right? You look as though you've seen a ghost, the alpha asked, concern etched into his face. I nodded wordlessly. Ah, is this about the blood alpha little one? Don't worry, I'll protect you. He teased me. Suddenly, the overwhelming urge to speak overcame me. I heard how harmoniz so bad Lisha went into Tokoma. I blurted out. The alpha's eyes darkened in anger. Do not speak on things you do not know about, little one. Did he? I quietly asked, my curiosity getting the better of me. He went silent for a few moments. Yes, it's true. But there is more to that relationship than meets the eye. They are no ordinary alpha and Luna. Poor girl, I murmured against the alpha. I felt sick to my stomach thinking about all of the pain that the blood alpha must put her through. The alpha chuckled as if he knew something I didn't. Do not fear for the blood Luna's safety, little one. She is more than capable of holding her own. I snorted against the blood alpha. Unlikely. Despite my opinion on the matter, I decided to drop it, seeing that the topic of the blood alpha and his mate was a sensitive subject with him. I wondered what happened there. Are you Theren or Cynan? I asked suddenly remembering Gradon's earlier words. Theren, Alpha of Blue Moon, he proudly spoke and my mouth dropped open. They were the biggest pack on the continent. I know, impressive, right? The smirked at me and his carefree attitude made me laugh. He was nothing like my old alpha from what I remember. And he was nothing like what Gradon had told me about alphas. How did you find me? I quietly asked, not wanting to anger him with all my questions. We were looking for someone and came across your cabin. We thought that the person may have been staying there. Instead, I found something much more valuable. He smoothly spoke, effectively making a blush rise to my cheeks. We have to go back, I suddenly said, twisting in his arms. Calm down, little one. We don't need to go back to your cabin. I promise you I have more than enough money to buy you whatever you need for my house. Theren soothed me. My grandmother, I blurted out. For once, I managed to surprise and confuse him. There was nobody home, little one. My men searched the whole house and surrounding woods. I realized my mistake. Uh, the thing is I sort of used magic to turn my grandmother's passed on form into a tree and I sort of need to take care of the tree because I would feel if my grandmother was gone twice because of me, I explained. He looked at me as if I had grown a second head. Thankfully, he kept the questions minimal and pretended like he didn't think I belonged in an asylum. What tree? I will have some of my men retrieve it and bring it to my territory. He spoke as if it were an everyday conversation, and for once I was glad for his expressionless face. It's a small cherry tree right in the front. Please make them be careful with it, I begged him, knowing I sounded absolutely bonkers. To his credit, he remained composed. Of course, I will have my men be careful with your grandmother tree. No harm will come to it, he promised, and I smiled gratefully. Gradon was wrong. The was nothing like the blood alpha. Or so I thought.

Chapter 4.

I can walk on my own, you know, I told Thein, who hadn't released me from his grip since he first picked me up. He looked down at me in amusement, his mouth quirking to the side. Yes, Onixa, I do know. Did you know that you're far too slow and we won't cover enough ground if you walk yourself? I huffed at him. Okay, rude. I'm not a completely incompetent wolf. I've survived as a rogue for like a decade and a half. His striking green eyes softened. I know, little one. I'm sorry you had to live this life. While we're on the topic, though, why did you become a rogue? I'm assuming since you were so young, it wasn't your choice. I cringed at the memory of what happened to Kilmore's arm. I don't want to talk about it, I mumbled. Curiosity deepened in his gaze, but suddenly he jerked his head to the side and stared into the distance. "What are you looking at?" I asked him, confused by his behavior. There's someone coming. Not one of my men. A rogue. Likely Theren didn't sound worried, only vexed, as if a rogue was just a slight irritant rather than a legitimate threat. He set me on my feet. Don't move. I'm going to go neutralize the threat. You're leaving me alone? I asked slightly panicked. Despite my gift, I always felt anxious being alone in the woods. I knew that I wasn't a very strong wolf, and it would be easy for someone to incapacitate me if they caught me off guard. The gave his signature crooked smile. Don't worry, little wolf. This won't take long. Plus, my men are stationed all throughout the woods. You'll be safe, I promise. I nodded, but felt uneasy. The sprinted into the distance. As a rogue, I knew what kinds of things went down in the woods. Rogue onrogue conflict was common, but I also knew that the Reaper could always come too. His attacks on rogues were always brutal. I came across the aftermath of it while traveling through the woods with Gradon. Gradon, in particular, had a vendetta against the Reaper. He wouldn't tell me why, but anytime he was brought up, Gradon would get incredibly angry and distant. I stood in place, looking around the woods, not wanting a wolf to sneak up on me while Theen was gone. Despite what Gradon said about him, I felt undeniably safe when I was with the possibly because of the mate Bond, but also possibly because I couldn't think of any wolf that would be strong enough to take him on. He exuded power and strength. Suddenly, I felt a hand grasp my shoulder. I jumped and was about to scream when a hand was placed over my mouth. Relax, Nyx. It's just me. I was relieved to hear Gradon's voice. Stop doing that. You're going to give me a heart attack. I whispered, yelling at him. I knew if the heard me, he would come running back. Sorry, sorry. I just had to apologize for what I said earlier. You know that's not what I meant. I don't think that misfortune follows you, Onixa. My issue is with the Kynan, not you, he said, and grabbed the side of my face so that I was looking at him. His thumb stroked my cheek. It was a familiar gesture that had been comforting over the years. I nodded. I'm not mad about the comment anymore. I just don't understand why you hate them so much. The blood alpha. Sure, I guess he's bad, but you haven't seen the way Theren is with me. He's gentle and sweet. Not at all a deranged, power- hungry alpha. Gray continued, stroking my cheek. Oh, Nyx, I know that's what you truly believe, but I have been around more alphas than you, and believe me when I say that they are all the same. full of rage, jealousy, and most of all, aggression. You dislike conflict, he pointed out. I frowned. He wasn't wrong. I cried when I saw him take down a rogue for the first time, even though the rogue was trying to harm us. Since then, he has always waited for me to leave before he finishes a fight. Nyx, we can run east and stay in uncharted territory. There won't be too many rogues, and you don't have to go with the you have options here. Gray pleaded and his hand dropped from my cheek and grasped my wrist. "Let's go before Theren gets back." "I'm beginning to think you don't want that arm." Theren's bored voice called out from a few yards away. Gray's eyes didn't leave mine. "Back off, The Onixa is an adult. She can choose who she goes with." My eyes darted back and forth between the two men. I hated making choices. Being indecisive was one of my most significant weaknesses. She is going with her mate. That is final. The voice was cold, calm, and calculated. If you try to stop me from taking what's mine, I will make you suffer a fate worse than death. I passed out. I woke up to the sound of Theren and Gradon arguing. My head was swimming as I struggled to follow the conversation. She can't handle aggression, you idiot. She hasn't been exposed to the same kind of brutality that you packs live by. Great on hist. She will learn. Theren bluntly said it is her destiny. No, it is her choice. Made bond or not, she will always be able to make her own choices. Gray argued. I don't disagree, pup. I have no desire to control her or do anything to her against her will. The only flaw in your logic is that she does want me. She will always want me. It's not some adolescent crush like you have. This is a mating bond, pup. You will understand once you find yours. Until then, stay out of my way or I promise you that I will end you. The only reason you're alive right now is because I don't want to upset Onixa. The spoke, but I could hear the threat in his tone. You're confident because of the mating bond. Alpha Grace sneered at him. But she was starting to fall for me even without some weird magic moon goddess nonsense. She is forced to be attracted to you. I don't need her to be forced. I could tell how smug he was, even with my eyes closed. Oh, yeah. She's awake now and eavesdropping. Let's ask her. The didn't sound any less confident, despite Gray's comment about me falling for him. Wait a minute. Oh, great. Busted.

Chapter 5.

I opened my eyes and smiled sheepishly at the two men who were staring expectantly at me. Hey guys, is anyone hungry? I'm kind of hungry right now. I could really go for a burger, maybe some pizza, boo. Or maybe a mate. I know you were listening in on the conversation, and I know you're trying to change the subject. You're not getting out of this. Darren plainly spoke, his eyes not giving away any emotion. And how would you know that? I scoffed, raising my eyebrows. Gradon interjected. Oh, did he not tell you? Alphas can read their mates's mind. So, he's been listening in on your thoughts this whole time. What? I shrieked, thinking of all of the thoughts I had about how attractive Theren is and how much I dislike his cousin. Little one, it's not like that. I have tuned into your thoughts a couple times, but I promise I'm not just constantly listening in on what you're thinking. I just wanted to make sure you were doing okay, there explained and glared at Gradon for exposing him. Well, stop, I exclaimed, panicked and feeling very violated. I have personal thoughts, things I don't want you to know. Theren frowned at this and was about to respond when Gradon jumped in. You can block out his thoughts. Just imagine a wall around your mind closing him out. You know an awful lot about Alpha's rogue. What pack were you originally from? Theren asked suspiciously. That's none of your business. Grace spat out venomously. I did as Gray instructed and felt a pressure I didn't notice until it had dissipated. Can you still hear my thoughts? I asked the tentatively. No, he grumbled and continued to look at Gray as if he would rip off his head at any moment. But Nyx, you can't keep trying to distract us. You need to choose who you'll be going with. Gray pointed out, folding his arms and staring at me seriously. I almost didn't recognize him like this. He was usually so full of laughter and jokes. Can't you come to Theren's territory, too? I pleaded with Gradon and reached out to grab his hand. "No," Gray harshly snarled, making me flinch. "I never want to be a part of a pack again. If you saw the brutality of packs, you would understand." "He's my mate," I whispered. "I have to go with him." "Ona, you don't have to do anything." "Why do you have to go with him?" "Because some controlling goddess decided you should be linked with him forever. We have something between us, even without some unnatural mating bond. Something real. I know you feel it, too. I smelt your interest before Theen came crashing in. Come on, Nyx. You could never be an Alpha's mate. You're far too pure, Gray insisted, his eyes searching mine for any sign of agreement. Okay, I've let this go on long enough, Theren stepped in. This isn't Twilight. There is no love triangle. Ona is mine and mine alone. There is no doubt about that. Whatever you had with her before ended the minute I set my eyes on her. If you don't accept that, then I will accept your defeat. The expression was neutral, but I could see his eyes blazing with fury. I wondered how close his wolf was to surfacing. Something told me there was a reason why Theen wasn't shifting around me. Trying to distract him so he didn't try to harm Gradon. I blurted out, "Eclipse." Both of the men looked at me in confusion. Did she hit her head? Theren asked Gradon. Gradon opened his mouth to respond when I interrupted, desperate to cool the tension in the air. You said Twilight. But the love triangle between Edward, Bella, and Jacob isn't really prominent until Eclipse, the third book in the saga. In Twilight, Jacob isn't even really in the book. And then Edward leaves for most of the second. So, it's actually not until eclipse that that the interrupted my babbling by holding up his hand. For some reason, he looked so dominating doing that that I instantly stopped speaking and waited for his following command. Where did that come from? I knew that wasn't me, so it had to be my wolf wanting me to follow Theren's orders. Ona, enough rambling, please. I'm not going to harm the pup unless he tries to stop you from coming with me. Theren was calm, but his threat was clear. Gradon snarled. You'll regret it if you call me pup one more time. Theren gave a cold smile. I would love to see you try, pup. Gradon started shaking so badly with anger that I was sure that he would shift. Theren grinned when he effectively provoked Gray and cracked his knuckles in anticipation. Stop. If you two don't knock it off, I'm not going with either one of you. I scolded them, trying to sound serious. In reality, I knew my threat had little to no merit. They could both easily overpower me and take me with them, but hopefully my threat would come across as serious regardless. Theren chuckled. You're coming with me, little one, whether I deal with this smut or not. We are mates. I know you may not fully understand what that means now, but you will soon. The placed a large hand on the side of my face and stroked my cheek with his thumb. I felt as though I was under a spell as I stared into his vibrant green eyes and felt an electric sensation where his skin touched mine. After a few moments, I heard a cough. Are you done making puppy dog eyes at each other yet? Regardless of what you say, the choice is really up to Ona. Do you want to go with him, Nyx? Gray spoke, making me jump away from the touch. Yes, I answered firmly. He's my mate. But that doesn't mean I don't want you in my life, Gray. I want you to come too, I pleaded. No. Gradon firmly responded. Once you see how alphas truly are, you'll regret choosing him. I'll be there when you realize it. Goodbye, Nyx. I'll see you soon. With that, he disappeared, turning invisible and going who knows where. The grinned. Now that that's all sorted out, it's time for you to come home, little one. The drive back was pretty uneventful. One of his men drove us back in a black SUV and the drive lasted a few hours. Thankfully, the didn't make any attempt to touch me or talk to me and instead left me alone with my thoughts. My head felt like it was going to explode with all of the thoughts in my mind running rampant. Were packs really that bad if Gray was so opposed to going to one? If alphas really were so horrible, then why has Theen been nothing but delicate with me the entire time? But then again, how could Theren defend someone who abused his mate? I understand that it's his cousin, but harming someone so severely that they go into a coma is inexcusable,

especially if it's your mate. Did the plan on hurting me, too? I mentally asked myself that final question as we pulled into the driveway of a large mansion. My heart started beating wildly from the anxiety I felt. Would I have to share a room with Aaron once we were alone? Did he plan on hurting me just like the blood alpha? My anxiety felt so intense that I almost couldn't breathe.

"Ona, what's wrong?" Theren asked, panicked. His eyes searched over my body, looking for wounds. When he didn't find any, he reached over to my side of the car and pulled me into his lap. The person driving the vehicle got out without saying a word. I assumed Theren held me as I hyperventilated, trying to calm myself down. Did I make a huge mistake by going with him instead of Gradon?

"Shu, it's okay, little one. You're safe. Don't be scared," he soothed me, rubbing circles on my back.

I've lived isolated in the forest for most of my life. I finally spoke when I was calmed down enough. "This is all so overwhelming."

Theren looked at me with sympathy. "Oh, mate, it'll be okay. We will take it slow while you adjust to pack life. I promise you will like it here. I'll do whatever I can to make the transition easier, okay?"

"Whatever you ask for is yours. Even if I want my own room," I asked hopefully, not sure if he would agree to it.

He frowned and paused before answering. "My wolf would feel much more at ease if we were in the same room. But if it's what you want, I will not deny my mate."

"Thank you," I choked out, stunned by his kindness. He was nothing like the alphas that Gradon described. Theren was different.

"Anything for you, little mate," Theren mumbles into my hair and then presses his lips on my head. A jolt of electricity went through my body. Thankfully, he didn't try going any further and instead opened the car door and effortlessly got out, all while cradling me in his arms.

"I can walk myself," I echoed my words from earlier.

"They're inside."

"I know. I just like having you close. It puts me at ease." Nevertheless, he sat me gently down on my feet. Looking down, I realized my body was covered in dirt and grass stains. "Ew, I need a shower." I wrinkled my nose and Theren laughed.

"Let me show you to your room then," Theren said, grabbing my hand and guiding me into the mansion. When we walked in, my breath was taken away. It was incredibly modern and clean-looking, as if nobody had ever lived in it. "It's fancy. Are you rich?" I blatantly asked.

Theren laughed again. "You're so direct, little mate. Yes, I have money from various investments and property I own."

I nodded. I vaguely recall my old alpha having a large house as well. I couldn't remember what they called the building. He continued guiding me through the house and up a few sets of stairs until we reached the end of the hall.

"You will be staying here," Theren formally spoke and opened the door. When I walked in the room, I took a big inhale. "This is your room," I pointed out. "It smells too much like you to not be a room."

Theren flashed a guilty smile. "Sorry, mate. I promise I won't sleep in here with you, but it would calm my wolf down more if you stayed here. If you want another room, though, I can prepare a guest room."

"Oh, um..." I didn't quite understand why his wolf would feel better if I stayed in his room, but I agreed nonetheless.

"Okay, sure, fine. Since you won't be sleeping here, I guess it's not a problem. You're so agreeable, Onixa." Theren kissed my forehead, and it made me blush. I was worried I would get a wild mate that was hard to reign in.

I frowned. "I think all alphas would get calm mates. I would also find it hard to believe that anyone would stand up to an alpha, even if it was their mate. Alphas are pretty scary."

Theren laughed at my words, and I wasn't quite sure why. "You would be surprised. Also, you're going to be the Luna. You do not need to fear any alpha and may stand up to whoever you like, including myself. Don't worry, mate. You'll toughen up here. Now, go shower and go to sleep. We have a lot to do tomorrow."

I nodded and he kissed my cheek before saying good night. I showered and raided his closet for a pair of pajamas. I really did need to buy some clothes of my own. Before I fell asleep, one thought floated around my head. What if I didn't want to toughen up? I don't want to be one of those aggressive wolves that harm people for looking at them the wrong way. Is that what Theren wants me to be?

Chapter 6. I woke up momentarily panicking when I woke up in an unfamiliar room until I recalled the events of the previous day. Suddenly, three loud knocks on the door shook the whole bedroom. Frightened, I didn't make a sound until I heard a vaguely familiar voice call out, "Luna, are you safe?" Confused, I responded. "Um, yes." The same voice replied after a moment. "Okay, just checking." I could faintly hear his steps as he walked away from the door. What was that about?

I put on one of Theren's shirts and a pair of his sweatpants, rolling the waistband and ankle cuffs a few times until I wasn't swimming in them. Theren said he would buy me anything I needed for his territory, but until then, I was stuck in his huge loungewear. I wondered where he put my grandmother. Now technically dressed, I left the room where I ran right into a wall. Nay, a human.

"Oof." I instinctively brought my hand up to my forehead which collided with the man in front of me. "Goodness, are you okay?" the muscular man asked, concern etched on his face.

"My name is Nyx, not goodness," I said slightly dazed.

The man stared at me in a mixture of confusion and bewilderment. "I... what?"

"It's a joke, Hulk," I smiled, the disorientation wearing off slightly.

Hulk frowned. "What did you just call me?"

Now it was my turn to frown. "Hulk, aka Bruce Banner. From the Marvel Comics and Cinematic Universe." If he wasn't already confused, now he looked like the epitome of it.

"How hard did you hit your head?"

I sighed heavily. "Uncultured wolf. Forget it. Anyways, who are you and why are you standing outside of Theren's room?"

The man straightened up. "I am Leyon, Beta of Blue Moon. I was in the search party with Theren when he found you."

I frowned as I recalled him specifically asking if Theren should take care of Gradon and me. "You asked if you should harm me."

He winced as he recalled. "Technically, yes."

I raised my eyebrows. "And not technically."

"Also, yes," he answered without hesitation, making me laugh. "No harm, no foul." I shrugged and held out my fist for him to give me knuckles. He stared at my hand in confusion, and I withdrew it. What was wrong with these wolves? Hadn't they ever seen a movie before?

"Anyways, Theren regrets to inform you that he received an urgent call and has to deal with it immediately, and it may take all day to sort out. I will be guarding you for the day. So, if you want anything, just ask," Hulk said in an "I mean business" tone.

"Okay. Well, since you offered, I'll take chocolate chip pancakes," I responded without hesitation.

"What?"

He offered. He stared at me blankly for a few moments like he was analyzing me. "As you wish, Luna. I will have the chef prepare it immediately." I smiled. "Oh, and I want something else, too." He looked terrified by whatever I was going to request next. "Yes, Luna. Do you have a TV around here?"

So, anyways, when Thanos really beat up the Hulk, he was too scared to resurface even when Banner tried to call him, which is why he's only Bruce Banner for the rest of the movie. I explained the events in Infinity War.

Leon snorted. "And you compare me to him? I would never run from a fight, Luna."

"Luna," I mimicked his voice in an exaggerated, high-pitched tone. "I told you not to call me that." I ordered as I threw a pillow at him, and I told you that it was how I was raised. So, I will only call you Luna."

"Luna," he retorted for what was maybe the 10th time today. It was almost 8:00 p.m. and Theren had still not returned. We watched a few Marvel movies, all of which I had already seen, but Leon was a noob.

"When will Theren be back? It's night time," I whined to Leon. I couldn't deny that my wolf felt unsettled being far from her mate after just meeting him yesterday.

"He should be back soon," Leon replied, making me frown. He had been saying that for the past 2 hours. I had a lot of questions for Theren, and I was eager for him to return so he could answer them.

"What was the urgent call about?" I pestered Leon, even though I knew he wasn't a very chatty person. I was. And he was the only person around for me to talk to.

Leon hesitated. "I'm not sure if I'm supposed to tell you about that yet."

I frowned. "Does it have to do with why you were in the forest?" Leon didn't answer, confirming what I thought. "You said that it was a search party. What were you searching for?" I interrogated him.

The familiar, apathetic voice that I had been missing all day filled the room suddenly. "Not a what? A who?" I turned to the source of the voice. "Hi, Theren." I smiled at my mate, suddenly shy that he had overheard me harassing his beta.

"Little one," he nodded at me as he greeted me. He turned to Leon. "Leon, you may leave now. Thank you for watching her today." He politely thanked his beta, who nodded in response and left the room swiftly without saying anything else.

Theren sat next to me on the oversized leather couch, not touching me, which bothered me slightly. "Who are you looking for?" I asked, emboldened.

Theren didn't answer for a moment, but stared deeply into my eyes. "A very bad person." Even though he was technically answering my questions, he was also being intentionally vague.

"What did he do?" I pressed, desperate to sate my curiosity.

"He hurt someone very close to me," Theren answered slowly, pain clouding his eyes. I was almost deterred from pestering him, but not quite.

"Who?" I asked and decided that it would be my last question until I dropped it for now.

Theren paused before answering. "The Luna of Bloodlake." Out of instinct, my breath hitched in my throat at the mention of Bloodlake. The number one rule of being a rogue is always to steer clear of anyone or anything related to Bloodlake.

"I see," I responded after a minute in a soft tone. Theren had a sorrowful look on his face as he reached his hand out to cup my cheek. "Ona, please just give the blood alpha and Luna a chance. They're not bad people. You will see."

I narrowed my eyes. "I will see. What is that supposed to mean?"

"They're inside," and soothingly stroked my cheek with his thumb, sending chills down my spine. "We are very close. You will have to meet them eventually." I didn't plan on it, but I decided not to argue about it for now.

"Why are you looking for the guy that harmed the blood Luna instead of the blood alpha?" I questioned. Surely the alpha would want to be the one to seek revenge on the person who hurt his mate.

"He had to make a binding oath not to in order to save Aizio's life. I volunteered to be the one to go after him," Theren simply explained and I processed his words.

"You called the blood Luna by her name. Are you close?" I asked, implying that he had relations with her.

Theren looked confused as he answered. "I am, yes. Cayenne is my cousin. So his mate is my family as well now."

"Were you two involved?" I asked directly. His face contorted in disgust. "Ona, no. She's like a little sister to me. Also, do you really think kind and would have allowed me to live if anything happened between her and I?" he pointed out and I definitely thought it was a valid point. Gradon had told me that alphas were extremely possessive wolves.

"Okay. Okay. I was just wondering since you speak of her so highly," I said defensively. I couldn't help feeling jealous about the way Theren talked about the shewolf.

"If you met her, Nyx, you would understand the admiration. There's no need to be jealous though, love. You are my soulmate, the only person who completes me. Nobody could ever shine brighter than you in my eyes." The stare was so intense that I had to look away as a blush crept on my cheeks. "Um," I eloquently responded.

Theren changed the subject quick to avoid any awkwardness. "You should get to bed. You have training bright and early."

"Training?" I questioned.

"Yes, little one. Training. All of the wolves in my pack train, even the Luna. Especially the Luna, since it is vital that she knows how to protect herself and since she will have to fight other wolves," he explained and I nodded slowly. It made sense. I assumed he was talking about how there may be times when I'm left unguarded and someone might attack. Boy, was I wrong about that assumption.

Chapter 7. "Be gone. The power of the moon goddess compels you," I yelled as I held my fingers out in front of me in the shape of a cross, keeping my eyes shut.

"Stop being so dramatic, Onixa," Theren said in his typical dry tone, and I could almost hear his eyes rolling. "It's only 7:00 a.m. Usually, people begin training at 6:00 a.m. at the very latest."

"I don't want to train," I whined as I pried my eyes open to glare at my mate. Theren glared back at me, even though I could see the corners of his mouth fighting a smile. I don't recall asking if he wanted to or not. Stupid alpha. I groaned as I threw the covers back over my head.

"What can I say? I'm not really a morning person."

"Excuse me," Theren's voice was harsh, and I poked my head out of the covers to see if he was actually mad. Even though his eyes were narrowed, I could see traces of amusement in them. "How about a deal, little one?"

I narrowed my eyes in suspicion. "What kind of deal?"

His lips turned up in a mischievous grin. "You don't ever have to train. If you can land one punch on me."

"One punch?" I perked up at his offer. "That's all? That's too easy?"

Theren chuckled lowly. "Okay, mate. Let's see what you've got then."

"What now?" I asked, cocking my head to the side.

"Yep. Get up, little one. If I pin you without you landing a hit on me, then you have to go to training." His voice was slightly amused, as if he wasn't possibly entertaining the idea that I may be able to get a hit on him.

I shrugged. "Okay, just remember that you were the one who suggested this." The response was sarcastic.

"Yeah, okay, little one. Less talking, more punching." I rolled my eyes and swung my legs out of the bed. Theren's shirt went well over my thighs, so at least I wasn't too exposed. I really did need to get my own clothes, though. I squared up in a fighting stance I had seen Gradon do many times, and Theren's grin broadened, his white teeth glistening. Trying to have the upper hand by throwing the first punch, I swung my fist at him. He easily caught it and used it to pull me closer to him. He put his other arm around mine, so it was squeezed to my side. He didn't let go of my fist despite my squirming to get away.

"We should spar more often, little mate," Theren winked at me as he smiled victoriously.

"No fair," I whined, my struggling feudal. "I didn't stretch or eat breakfast and Mercury is in retrograde."

And he cut me off. "No excuses, love. What happened, too? That's too easy. Go get dressed. I had a pack member go shopping for you yesterday and get the essentials. After training, you can go into town and pick out whatever else you want, but there should be training clothes in the closet."

"There should be training clothes in the closet," I mocked his voice in a high-pitched tone to get on his nerves. He may be forcing me to attend training, but I wouldn't make it easy on him. Theren just rolled his eyes and released me from his grasp.

"Cute little one. It'll take more than childish mocking to get under my skin, I'm afraid." I mocked him again as I went into the closet, turning my back on him. Much to my dismay, he just laughed loudly. I got dressed in black leggings, a sports bra, a white tank top, and black and white running shoes. The outfit was a little bit too plain for my taste, but it would do for now. Theren looked at me appreciatively as I stepped out of the closet.

"Don't look so smug," I muttered as I put my dark hair up into a ponytail. My comment just made his smirk deepen.

"Let's go to the training center, little mate. You won't be training with the rest of the pack until after the mating ceremony." Theren grabbed my hand with his and guided me out of the room.

"Mating ceremony?" I repeated, dazed. This was all happening rather quickly.

"Mating ceremony," Theren confirmed as we exited the pack house. "Hopefully, I claim you. You become a part of Blue Moon and you are officially the Luna. Hopefully."

I frowned, looking up at him. Theren winced. "Ah, yes. Hopefully that's how the mating ceremony goes."

My confusion intensified. "What does that mean?"

Theren sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose as we continued to walk to the training center. His pack land was exceptionally green with soft grass underneath our footfall at every turn. "Onixa, let's discuss this later, okay? Just focus on your training and we will talk about it another time."

I narrowed my eyes. "That's real convenient of you, boss. But sure, let's talk about it later." I surprised myself by letting venom seep into my words. Theren also looked surprised. His usually emotionless face changed into one of shock as his eyebrows raised. "M. Okay, later then." Theren tried to prod conversation out of me for the rest of the walk, but I kept my responses short and polite, yet not inviting conversation. I could sense his frustration with me rising, but I was also frustrated. I hate feeling like something is being hidden from me.

We finally reached a large building which was almost empty inside besides a few mats, punching bags hung up, and targets scattered around. "Alpha," a female voice greeted Theren, and I almost had a heart attack at the sudden sound. I could have sworn we were alone, but the voice came from directly behind us.

"Clevette, hello," Theren politely responded as we turned around to look at the quiet woman who startled me. "Ona, this is my head warrior, Clevette. She leads the trainings when my gamma is occupied. After the pack leaders, she is the strongest wolf in Blue Moon. You are very lucky to learn from her."

I nodded, pushing the jealous thoughts out of my head as I inspected the shewolf in front of me. Her face displayed no signs of emotion as I made eye contact with her. She was tanned and had dark brown hair, only slightly lighter than mine. Her most defining feature was her muscular physique, which was prominent. She nodded once at me and slightly exposed her neck towards me, a sign of respect and submission.

"Okay, have fun with Clevette, little one. I'll be back to come get you in 2 hours or so." Theren kissed the top of my head and I looked up at him in betrayal. "You're leaving me?" I asked, panic seeping into my voice.

"Sure. It'll be okay, little mate." Theren bent down slightly so he was at eye level with me and grasped my shoulders. "You'll be safe with her. She's one of my most trusted wolves and one of the most confident. I can't stay."

"Why not?" I whimpered, not liking how weak I sounded, but also not liking the idea of being alone with this powerful woman who could likely snap me in half with one flick of her wrist.

"My wolf will be too upset by watching you fight someone and try to neutralize the threat. You don't want me to hurt Clevette, do you?" he asked rhetorically, and I sighed.

"Okay, fine. See you in 2 hours," I grumbled and he kissed my forehead one more time before ducking out.

"Mm. Hi," I said to Clevette once Theren was gone. She nodded once at me but didn't greet me further. I got the sense that she wasn't much of a talker.

"You have poor muscle definition." My mouth dropped open.

"Excuse me?"

Her dark eyebrows raised. "It's not meant to be an insult, just an observation. We'll have to increase your muscle mass if you want to stand a chance."

"Stand a chance against what?" I asked. Everyone made it sound like I was about to be in a war.

Confusion marred Clevette's face. "He didn't uh... never mind, Luna. Go run eight laps around the track and we'll see how well you do." Whatever Theren and his little pack were hiding from me, I would find out if it was the last thing I ever did.

Chapter 8. "Ugh. OMG," I grumbled.

"What was that, Ona?" Clevette flashed her canines at me as she stood over me. I closed my eyes, putting my arms over my head. My whole body was sore. I was positive that I would be entirely black and blue when I woke up in the morning. As it turned out, Clevette's method for training was to have me do a lot of workouts and then best me in hand-to-hand combat. Clevette was not only incredibly strong looking, but she was even stronger than she looked.

"Come on, Onixa. One more round," Clevette ordered.

"Can't I just forfeit?" I whined. I was sick of being repeatedly tossed around. It felt like someone had put me through a ringer.

"Really? This is supposed to be our Luna." A high-pitched voice I didn't recognize sneered. I opened my eyes to see a blonde girl with a small upturned nose looking down on me as I still lay on the training mat in pain.

"I will not allow you to disrespect her in front of me. Brenda, she may not be the Luna yet, but she is Alpha Theren's mate, which means I will defend her regardless." Clevette's voice issued a warning.

"From what I can tell based on the last sparring round, she'll never be able to be the Luna." Brenda laughed, sounding strangely victorious.

"Do not speak any more of this in front of her," Clevette hissed, taking a step towards Brenda. Brenda stepped back and looked at me, who looked back at her in confusion. Realization flashed on her face. "She doesn't know?" she asked, dumbfounded. Clevette just glared at her in silence, folding her muscular arms over her chest. It looked like she was mind-linking her in response. An evil grin spread across Brenda's face. She looked like every mean girl in every teen romance movie I had ever watched.

"Regardless of what Theren says, I think that his little mate should know that she won't be here next month." Clevette growled and leapt at Brenda, who didn't even attempt to get her off. She just continued to smirk at me as Clevette wrapped her hand around her neck. I got off the mat and bent down next to Brenda, who didn't look at all concerned by Clevette's hand around her neck.

"What are you talking about?"

Brenda's eyes flashed in a combination of victory and amusement. "What Theren didn't tell you is that you get to be challenged for the Luna position. The loser is exiled from the pack." My mouth slacked open in disbelief. How could he not tell me that? And from what I can see, I can tell that I'll be able to defeat you easily. And since we can't use our gifts, I'll get to do it with my bare hands, which will make it all the sweeter," Brenda said. Her voice still perky, although her face started turning red as Clevette squeezed tighter. My blood ran cold at her words. I looked at Clevette and her eyes were cast downward when I made eye contact with her, confirming that everything Brenda said was true.

"I need some air," I mumbled, standing up.

"Onixa, wait." Clevette's raspy voice stopped me in my tracks. "The said, 'You can't be on pack grounds without an escort. Just wait until he gets back and you can talk to him about this, please.'"

"Theren is the last person I want to talk to right now," my voice surprisingly guttural. I continued to walk away, but Clevette stopped me again. "I know I made it sound like a request, but it's not. I will not let you leave this training center until Theren is here." Clevette warned me.

"You don't have the choice," I responded stoically, feeling numb to the world. I withdrew energy from one of the plants near the door until it decayed and turned the energy in my hands until it was dark black. I sent the ball at Clevette, who had stood up and reached out towards me. Part of the ball wrapped itself around her wrists and ankles, and the rest of it went to Brenda, who was still sprawled on the ground. The dark matter went around her neck, pinning her to the ground. I sprinted out of the training center, ignoring the various bouts of pain that my exertion had brought on. Luckily, I didn't see anyone around. I was worried that Theren would have shown up already, but maybe he didn't have time to react to Clevette's mind link. I sprinted across the field and almost made it into the woods when a muscular man with light brown hair stopped me.

"I don't suppose you're Theren's runaway maid?"

"Nope. Don't know her," I responded as I quickly withdrew the life force from the grass on the ground, leaving a circle of dead grass around me. I threw the photon ball at the man who was no doubt a guard, and the energy clustered around his feet, holding him to the ground.

"Don't run, girl. You'll make my life and yours so much easier if you just stay here." The guard, rather than sounding worried, sounded vexed. I couldn't blame him. I was sure Theren would be irate that I got away.

"If I stay here, I won't be in this pack for long," I hissed in response, and he looked taken aback by my words. I continued sprinting into the woods, drawing energy from the various plants to create a fog that spread behind me, obscuring the vision of anyone who might be following me. When I was certain that no one would be able to trail me, I slowed down to a walk. I was panting while trying to catch my breath. God, I really am out of shape.

Suddenly, I heard twigs breaking to my right. When I didn't see anyone, I laughed. "Not funny, Gradon. How did you even know where I was?" I rolled my eyes, but was relieved that it was him and not some dangerous rogue. I waited for Gradon to materialize, but after a few moments of eerie silence, he didn't. "Gray, you're so irritating sometimes. I know it's you. Stop messing around. I have bad news I need to tell you about," I pleaded as my eyes searched through the heavy forestry, willing him to appear. When a couple more seconds went by, and Gradon was still nowhere to be seen, my heart began pounding furiously in my chest. I had seen enough horror movies to know that this is the part where the main character starts running, trips, and then the monster gets them.

"Whoever it is, I can promise you that you really don't want to start anything with me," I pleaded. And I knew that my voice sounded shaky and made my threat pathetic. "My mate is out here looking for me and he's a tremendous dude. Like really big. I'm pretty sure he can bench at least Sev." My voice was cut off when I felt a sharp blow to the back of my head. I nearly collapsed on the ground, but muscular arms caught me. I looked into the beautiful green eyes of the stranger who assaulted me. Despite the throbbing pain in my head, in a daze, one of my hands reached out and touched the face of the same guy who caused it.

"Pretty," I mumbled, my head still spinning. Looking back on this moment later, I realized I couldn't picture what he looked like. I just knew he was one of the most attractive people I had ever seen. My attacker flashed a brilliantly white grin. "Maybe I should startle pretty girls more often if this is how they respond," he chuckled, the sound making my heart beat faster. "Sleep now, Onixa. I promise that everything will be okay," the man promised. And I couldn't focus on what he was saying because I was too distracted by his beauty and my pain. I nodded in submission and closed my eyes. And you know what? He was right.

Chapter nine. "Aay!" I screamed as I awoke. Whoever says that they come out of a coma calmly is completely wrong because all I felt was fear when I woke up from mine. Adrenaline raced through my body as I frantically looked around the room, trying to understand where I was and what had happened. A figure quickly raced into the room, and in my confusion, I began screaming again until a hand was placed over my mouth. I concentrated hard to understand who the figure was, and when I felt the sparks, I knew.

"Theren," I said in relief. "Well, actually, try to speak." He still had his hand over my mouth which made it sort of hard to enunciate.

"If I take my hand off your mouth, will you scream again?" His mouth quirked to the side even though I could sense his anxiety. I shook my head and he started talking again. "What happened?" He asked, stroking my cheek with his hand. Subconsciously, I leaned into his hand.

My confusion deepened. "Shouldn't I be asking you that?"

Theren's eyebrows furrowed. "You don't remember where you've been or what happened to you?" My expression mirrored his confused visage as I tried to recall the last events I remembered. "The last thing I remember was I was training with with Clevette. I ran out, confronted the guard. Sorry, guard." My voice trailed off.

"Is that all you remember?" The distressed look deepened as shadows overtook his face. I concentrated harder even though the action made my head spin. "Oh goodness, I'm going to be sick." I leaned over the bed.

"Sick? What does that mean?" Theren began to ask, but my body answered his question before I could. My body shook as I continued to get sick over the side of the bed. To his credit, he didn't run out of the room gagging. Instead, he held my hair back as my body rejected everything in it, mostly fluids. When I was finished, I dry heaved for a couple more minutes as I tried to get my head to stop spinning. "It means to throw up," I answered, wiping my mouth when I was done. Theren looked bewildered, either impressed by the word or disturbed by what had just happened. Probably the latter, if I had to guess.

"What was that?" he asked, concern etched all over his face. It was bizarre to see any emotion on his typically stoic expression.

I shrugged. "I'm not sure. Shouldn't you know the answer to that since I'm the one who's been unconscious for who knows how long?"

Theren frowned. "You were missing for about 5 hours. My men and I searched every inch of the woods on our territory. And just when I was about to go into uncharted territory to look for you, my beta Leon said that when he was leaving the pack house, you were on the front porch."

"I was on the porch," I repeated slowly, trying to see if my memory would resurface.

Theren's frown deepened. "You don't remember how you got there? Ona, if you are trying to scare me to get back at me for not telling you about the Luna challenge, this is going too far."

I interrupted him angrily. "Are you accusing me of faking this?" Suddenly, a flashback overtook my mind. All I saw were piercing green eyes looking down at me as the man pulled me in closer.

"Ona, what do you remember? Who took you?" Theren shook my shoulders as he tried to pull me out of the memory. I shook my head trying to clear my mind. "I'm a man. He hit me. His eyes were so green. He picked me up, said that everything would be okay, but I wouldn't remember it." My voice trailed off as I couldn't remember anything that came after.

Theren's voice was low and when he spoke after a moment of silence. "Did he hurt you?"

I furrowed my brows. "Besides the initial blow, I don't think so. I remember feeling safe with him." I left out that I was extremely attracted to the man, not wanting to make Theren angrier.

"The pack doctor checked you over. Besides the injury on your head, he couldn't find any other signs of harm." Theren sounded stoic as usual, even though I could see his inner turmoil in his eyes.

"Why did he take me if he didn't hurt me and planned on returning me a few hours later?" I whispered in confusion. "Did... Did he hurt me in that way?" I choked out.

Theren's expression turned into a combination of shock and horror. "Oh, sweet little mate." Theren quickly climbed into the bed next to me and held my shaking frame to his chest. "No, he didn't. I would have been able to feel through the mate bond if someone had harmed you like that."

I exhaled in relief, trying to calm myself. "Then why would he take me? It doesn't make any sense."

Theren frowned, stroked my matted hair, and sighed. "The truth is, I don't really know. I would have expected someone who took you to have made demands and threatened your safety if I didn't comply. The fact that the individual responsible just returned you after a few hours leads me to believe that it may have been a warning."

"A warning for what?" I asked, confused.

"They're inside. It's a long story, Onixa." I just stared at him expectantly and he continued after a moment. "In summary, a bad man really hurt the blood alpha's mate and I've been searching for him ever since. He's very powerful and has a lot of connections, so I'm sure this incident has something to do with him."

I digested his words. "But why are you looking for the man instead of the blood alpha? I have a hard time believing that the blood alpha wouldn't want to get revenge for his mate himself."

"He made a very powerful oath not to in order to save his mate. Luckily, I made no such oath, so I offered to look for him myself," Theren explained, still stroking my hair.

"Is that why you were looking in the woods when you found me?" I asked, and Theren nodded. We sat in silence for a few minutes, and I'm sure he was struggling to find words, just as I was until I remembered.

"Why didn't you tell me about the challenge for the Luna position?" My tone was harsh and accusatory.

"They're inside. I know. I'm sorry, little one. I should have told you sooner. I was worried you would be overwhelmed with that knowledge and panic."

I snorted. "Oh, you think? Gee, I wonder why I would be worried about someone challenging me just so they could take my place with you." Theren chuckled at my word choice, but his eyes soon saddened. "In hindsight, it would have been more prudent to tell you initially. I just knew it would be hard for you to transition into pack life and I didn't want to make it more difficult for you. I promise I planned on telling you later today."

I considered his words and even though I was still upset he didn't tell me, I could see why he didn't. "That girl Brenda, she's going to challenge me. She confronted me about it and told me as much."

"Yes," Theren confirmed simply.

"Is she going to win?" I whispered, choking up. I didn't want to lose my mate, but I also didn't want to be exiled.

Theren winced and paused before answering, making my stomach turn. "She is a strong warrior. She has also been waiting for me to find my mate, knowing that she would challenge her. That doesn't mean you can't win. It just means that you will have to train harder than you ever have before. I can't guarantee any outcome, though." I appreciated his honesty, even though his remarks made my blood go cold.

"Why you? Why is she so obsessed with you? It seemed personal when she confronted me about it."

Theren hesitated, looking away from me. "Ona, please. We can talk about this once you've recovered from your attack. You've gone through enough today. Let's keep things light for now. Okay." I may have grown up relatively sheltered, but I was no idiot.

"I see you two are together." Theren searched my eyes, trying to decipher my emotions. Luckily for him, he did not attempt to lie. "Yes. Before meeting you, Brenda and I were intimate several times. Our relationship was purely physical and she knew this."

I laughed, catching him off guard. "That's just great. So, because of your past actions, I now have to fight for the right to keep you as my mate and more importantly to stay in this pack." My words dripped in venom. I rarely ever got this angry, but when I did, my inner darkness couldn't be contained.

"Onixa, I..." Theren started, but I was done listening. I had heard enough out of him for today. "Stop. Save it for someone who cares what you have to say. Maybe Brenda," I snidly responded, throwing the covers off me and untangling myself from Theren's arms.

"Where are you going?"

"There are guards posted all around the pack house. You won't be able to leave," Theren warned.

"I'm going to see my grandmother. She won't believe this," I muttered. Theren looked confused for a moment until he remembered. "Right, your grandmother. The tree. I'll take you there. You don't know where it is," Theren pointed out. I sighed, knowing he was right. "Fine, but just don't talk to me, please." Theren looked hurt, but nodded anyway. I got dressed and put on a pair of sneakers to get ready to see my grandma. We left the pack house, and Theren was right. There were five wolves posted around the outside of the pack house. That seemed slightly like overkill, but maybe it wasn't, considering whoever took me did so on Theren's territory and dropped me off on Theren's doorstep undetected. After walking for only a few minutes, we reached the cherry tree.

"Hi, Grandma," I mumbled, touching the bark affectionately.

"Does she respond?" Theren asked. He didn't sound sarcastic, but rather genuinely curious.

"No," I snorted. "It's a tree, Theren. Don't be ridiculous." I sat down with my back against the tree and closed my eyes. I always felt most at peace when surrounded by nature and a sense of warmth always emanated from the cherry tree. Theren sat about 2 ft away from me and remained quiet while I meditated. When I was calm enough to talk to him, I did.

"You know," I spoke softly, catching him off guard, as he probably thought I would ignore him for the rest of the night. "I was so excited to find my mate. My grandmother always told me about how magical and surreal it feels to be with them. How it feels like your soul is complete."

"Nyx, I know that you're upset. Heck, I would be upset if you had been with someone before meeting me. But it doesn't change anything between us. Being with someone is just physical sometimes, and that's all it was between Brenda and I. I'm still your mate, whether you like it or not," the concluded. And by the time he was done, I was already shaking in anger again.

"So much for the meditation. But because of your actions, she is now challenging me for you. I didn't ask for this. I didn't even ever want to be Luna. All I wanted was to meet my mate, continue living in the woods, and have a simple life, maybe have some pups down the road. Instead, I'm thrown into this nightmare where now I have to fight some girl just to keep my mate and my home. I didn't want this." I cried out in anger, and I felt the need to take my anger out on Theren. My eyes blackened. I stood and lifted my arms, withdrawing the energy from the grass underneath me. Except it didn't work. Confused, I tried to take the energy from a nearby pine tree. That didn't work either.

"No, no, no," I whispered, falling to my knees and clutching my head. Theren rushed over to me, bending down next to me. "What's going on?" Panic seeped through his voice. I sobbed so hard my entire body was convulsing.

"It's gone. My gift is gone." At least now we knew why I had been taken.

Chapter 10. "I choked, desperately trying to inhale air as I felt like I was on the verge of passing out. After what felt like forever, Clevette finally released the hold she had on me. "I'll give you a 2-minute break and then we're going again." I coughed in response, clutching my shoulder and rubbing it tenderly. Clevette definitely did not take it easy on me. I didn't think it would bruise, but it certainly hurt. Clevette tossed me my water bottle as she stood above me since I continued lying on the ground. "Okay, break is over," she said after I sipped my water. Rolling my eyes, I mumbled that she definitely didn't even give me a minute-long break, but whatever. Clevette stood in a fighting stance, and I sighed as I mimicked her. We had been going at it for nearly 3 hours now. We stood staring at each other for a few seconds before, as always, she threw herself into my arms. She always made the first move. She said that the most vigorous defense is a potent offense. I wasn't sure if that's how the saying goes, but considering I could rarely get a hit on her, it was hard to argue with her. By some miracle, I was able to sidestep her as she charged at me. I quickly kicked at her leg while she was behind me, but as soon as I kicked, she turned and grabbed my leg. She pulled my leg hard enough for my other leg to go into the air, sending me falling to the ground. Clevette quickly moved on top of me, pinning me to the floor by my wrists. Darn, I cursed. It's not like I was genuinely expecting a different outcome, honestly. Clevette had pinned me in every match for as long as I had been training with her, which was now a week.

"Not your worst sparring, Onixa." Clevette's mouth turned up in what I would have called a smile if I didn't know that she wouldn't smile. "That's the first time you haven't let my first hit land. That means we're making progress." Clevette got off of me and I stood up with her, rubbing my wrists where her grip had restrained me.

"Oh yeah, excellent progress. I went from being pinned right away to being pinned almost right away. Someone get me a medal," I sarcastically responded.

Clevette frowned at me. "You can't give up. Ona, you've been putting a lot of work in this last week. The outcome of the Luna challenge is not set in stone yet." She was right about my putting in a lot of work. Ever since I had lost my gift a week ago, I threw myself into training. Not only because if I lost the Luna challenge, I would be exiled, but also because even if by some miracle I won it, I would have to learn how to defend myself without my magic. Despite Theren and his men's investigations, nobody had any concrete explanation for how my gift could vanish. It's not like I was going to wait in bed and cry every night until my gift magically reappeared. I may be down, but I'm not that down. I made a non-committal noise in response to her attempt at reassurance. Clevette and I both knew that I didn't stand a chance at beating Brenda. Brenda wasn't even abnormally strong for a shewolf. I was just significantly under average due to my lack of training as a rogue. I immensely regret always turning Gradon down when he tried to teach me how to fight. Until now, I always considered myself somewhat of a pacifist, but I suppose that since I'll be trying to win a challenge against another person in 3 weeks, that label no longer applies.

"Miss me?" I heard a deep voice question from behind me.

"Theren?" I breathed out. I would never get used to how quickly and quietly he could appear.

"I miss being around someone who isn't trying to beat me up," I joked as I turned around to look at him. The electric green eyes narrowed as he put his arms around me. "Is Clevette being too rough with you again, little one?" I rolled my eyes as Clevette scoffed as she was almost out of the training room door.

"No, we both unanimously answered my overprotective mate." When I had finished one particularly tough training session with Clevette, there was fury at the amount of bruises scattered around my body. I tried reassuring him that it was fine and I was okay, but he was shaking in anger and nearly shifted in his bedroom. My next training session, Clevette was considerably more gentle. And even though she didn't say anything to me, I knew that Theren had spoken to her.

Later that night, Theren had

inspected my skin for new bruises, and when he didn't find any, he gently kissed the old ones that were nearly healed. I shivered as I remembered his lips on my skin.

"Cold little one," the whispered in my ear when he felt my shiver. I shook my head, glad that my face was pressed to his chest so he couldn't see me blushing furiously.

"I'm sorry I was late picking you up. I had to make a phone call."

"To who?" I questioned, my curiosity peeking. I pulled away to look at him when he didn't immediately answer. Theren kissed my forehead.

"Don't worry about it, little one. We can talk about it tonight. I don't want you to spend all of today worrying about it."

"Why would I worry about it?" I asked, my stomach nodding with anxiety. Laughing, Theren affectionately twirled a piece of my hair from my ponytail.

"Because you worry about everything. Don't worry, it's not bad news." I narrowed my eyes at him, but decided to drop it. If it wasn't bad news, then I really had no reason to worry about it and could wait until tonight to hear it.

We left the training center and he had his large hand wrapped around mine. This had quickly become a tradition during the last week. The sparks I felt from touching his skin made getting beaten up at training almost worth it.

"Theren, we should talk about the Luna challenge," I finally said after we walked in silence back to his house.

"What would you like to talk about specifically?" Theren answered coolly, even though I could feel his gaze on me as he gauged my emotions.

"Let's not kid ourselves. We both know that Brenda is going to defeat me easily. Even a pup from this pack could beat me in a fight." I spoke earnestly, but made sure my voice didn't shake. I wanted him to talk freely about the situation and not worry about sparing my feelings.

Theren frowned and stopped walking. Still holding my hand, he pulled me in front of him and cupped my cheeks.

"Ona, please don't think so negatively. The fight isn't for another 3 weeks. You never know what could happen in between now and then."

I glared at him. "So, he decided to spare my feelings after all. 3 weeks isn't enough time to beat someone who's been training for their whole life."

Theren stared at me for a few moments before abruptly picking me up into his arms bridal style. My face contorted in confusion.

"Theren, what are you doing?" I yelled as he began sprinting. Due to his alpha speed, we quickly reached his house, but he didn't set me down until we were in his bathroom. He faced me to the mirror and I could see my confused expression and his, which as always expressed no emotion.

"Care to explain what we're doing, Theren?" He didn't speak, but instead took off my tank top, leaving me feeling exposed in only a sports bra. I glared at him.

"Shouldn't you be doing this in the bedroom?"

Theren's mouth twisted into a crooked smile as his eyes glinted with amusement. "Don't tempt me, little one. Stay focused."

"I don't even know what I'm supposed to be focusing on," I whined. "You just took my top off without any explanation, dude."

Theren growled lowly and playfully nipped my ear. "Don't call your alpha and mate, dude. Or else I'll take off your pants next, little mate." My eyes widened as I nodded, but I couldn't help but partially want that to happen.

Theren grabbed my wrist from behind me and extended my arm so that it was perfectly horizontal. "Look how much muscle you've gained just in the last week of training," he said proudly. I tilted my head and flexed in the mirror. Upon further inspection, he was right. I had gotten much more tone since I arrived. I wasn't muscular by any means, but I definitely had gained a slight definition.

"I can promise you that despite your different pasts, you are currently working 10 times as hard as Brenda is. She underestimates you and she's not training as hard because of it. Don't give up, little mate. It's not over until it's over." Theren squeezed my shoulders affectionately and kissed the back of my head.

I turned to him and stared into his green eyes, which the longer I stared at them, the darker they got until they were nearly black. We both leaned in and my breathing got shaky. Right when I was positive we were about to kiss, he abruptly pulled away.

"Drat," he mumbled as he got the same faraway look in his eyes as he did when he was mind linking someone. "I'm sorry, little one. The guards on territory patrol think that they caught the scent of a rogue near the outskirts of our border. And I'm going to go check it out. Leon is downstairs and he'll guard you while I'm gone."

"Do you have to go?" I complained, not wanting him to leave me again already, no matter how clingy that was. Theren chuckled.

"Yes, Nyx. Don't worry, I won't be long. Go downstairs, get some food, and hang out with Leon. I'll be back before you know it." He kissed my forehead one last time before ducking out quickly. I sighed, but decided to do as he said and go downstairs to see Leon. Before leaving, I showered and changed out of my sweaty training clothes.

When I was leaving the room, I was surprised to see someone just on the other side of the door.

"Brenda, what do you want?" I asked, irritated by her very presence alone.

"Watch the way you talk to me, pup." Brenda's small upturned nose crinkled in disgust. "I just came to tell you how excited I am to defeat you in just 3 weeks." I rolled my eyes and pushed past her so I could find Leon. To my surprise, she actually had the nerve to grab me by my bicep and squeeze it so tightly I was sure it would bruise.

"I said, 'Watch yourself.'" She hissed at me and threw me to the ground and I hit my head on the wall in the process. With her words, she walked away and tears welled up in my eyes. After that interaction, the last thing I wanted to do was talk to anyone, so I retreated into Theren's room and locked the door behind me.

Theren was right about him not being long and came back in under an hour. Leon said, "You never went downstairs. Are you hungry, little mate?" he asked as he sat next to me on the bed. I shook my head.

"Is something wrong?" he asked, concern etched in his tone. I saw his eyes run over my body as he inspected me. His gaze fell on my arm where a dark bruise in the shape of fingers lay.

"Is that from training?" Theren frowned. "I told you to go easy on you." I smiled weakly, not wanting him to know about Brenda. The last thing I wanted was for Brenda to accuse me of being a coward and hiding behind my mate.

"It's okay. I just bruise easily." I lied and kissed his cheek to ease his concern. It worked and his posture relaxed.

"Theren, you please tell me what the call was about. It's stressing me out." I begged. And even though I wasn't too worried about the call, I wanted to distract him from the bruise. Theren grinned.

"We're having visitors tomorrow."

"Visitors?" I repeated. "Who?" Theren had told me that he wanted to wait until the challenge was out of the way before anyone from neighboring packs visited.

The blood alpha and his mate.

Chapter 11.

I tossed and turned throughout the night, unable to get a restful sleep, knowing that the blood alpha and his mate would arrive in the morning. The lucky bastard, slept like a baby. He certainly wasn't as nervous as I was. When I asked why they were coming, he responded, "For training." I didn't want the blood alpha to train me. I did not doubt that he wouldn't be scared of Theren and would hurt me during training. Hell, he may even accidentally harm me. They don't call him the blood alpha for no reason.

Theren woke up at about 6, and after being awake for 2 hours, I began to think about the various ways the blood alpha could harm me. Even though Theren reassured me that Kynan wouldn't ever hurt his cousin's mate, I had my doubts.

"How long have you been awake, little one?" Theren asked suspiciously, most likely eyeing the dark circles under my eyes.

"Not long," I lied and gave him a fake, reassuring smile. He didn't buy it, seeing right through me as always.

"Oh, love, I told you not to worry. The blood alpha wouldn't ever bring harm to you." Theren reassured me once again, cupping my cheek. "In fact, you will be the safest person in the world if you are in the company of the blood alpha and his mate."

"Tell me more about his mate," I urged. Theren was pensive.

"It's hard to find the words to describe Arieio. I think it would be easier for you to just see her in action. I promise you'll get a good sense of her personality within the first 5 minutes of meeting her," Theren promised. "But you should know that she can't talk. So, if she's quiet, don't take it personally."

I frowned. "Can't talk?" The nodded. "Her tongue was taken by a rogue when she was young." My mouth dropped. "That's so sad. Poor girl. And now she's made it to the most intense man on the continent. That's got to be hard for her."

Theren laughed. "Oh, little one. The blood Luna is anything but a poor girl. Don't worry about the blood alpha and her. Even if the blood alpha wanted to harm her, I'm not sure he could."

I frowned. "What the hell does that mean?"

"I assume because the mate bond wouldn't allow him to hurt her. But if that was true, then how could the whipping rumor be true?"

"Little mate, please do not worry. You will meet them soon, and you'll feel silly for worrying about Arriio," Theren insisted, and I hesitated before nodding. If Theren wasn't worried about the girl, then I supposed he had good reason. Maybe the blood alpha had a heart after all.

"Now go get ready. They'll be here in an hour. They're early risers and left early this morning," Theren commanded me and I nodded. I put on jeans and a flowy white blouse, hoping this wouldn't be a formal occasion. Luckily, Theren wore his typical slacks and button-down shirt, which he rolled up to his elbows. My hair wouldn't cooperate today, so I put the black curly tendrils in a bun, ignoring the stray pieces that framed my face.

"Your beauty is unrivaled," Theren murmured suddenly behind me. I jumped, still not used to how quickly alphas can move.

"It was truly unfair," I blushed from his compliment. "You have to say that you're my mate," I argued to get on his nerves. He rolled his eyes.

"I can assure you that the moon goddess knew better than to match me with an unattractive wolf." He smirked and winked at me, the cocky little troublemaker. I laughed and swatted at his chest, but he caught my hand.

Theren pulled me in close. Suddenly, the ambience of the room went from joking to intensely serious as Theren's expression hardened. His eyes darkened. Not willing to let another mind link interrupt the moment, Theren swiftly grabbed me by the chin and jerked my head up. He bent down and his mouth was on mine. I kissed back without hesitation, although I must admit the spark between us was nearly as intense as being struck by lightning or sticking a fork in an electrical outlet. His hand moved from my chin to the back of my neck, and I got on my tiptoes so he wouldn't have to lean as far down, even though I was only about 10 inches shorter. Sensing what I was trying to do, Theren, in control as always, lifted me so that my legs were wrapped around his waist. He never broke the kiss, and our tongues and lips moved perfectly in sync. Theren growled against my mouth, and then, much to my discontent, pulled away and set me down.

"If the blood alpha didn't just cross into my territory, we would have been doing that the rest of the day." I nodded, trying to catch my breath. Theren tweaked my nose.

"You look lovely flushed, little mate." He winked at me and turned to leave his bedroom, leaving me stunned. He was so absolutely enchanting in everything he did and said that I often found myself frozen, trying to gather my thoughts. When I had calmed down slightly, I followed after him. He was slouching against a pillar near the front door.

"What took you so long?" He smirked at me. I just glared at him. Now was not the time to address his cockiness. It was though the time to panic about the blood alpha. Even thinking his name sent a shiver of terror through my body.

"I can hear your heartbeat quicken, little mate," Theren murmured as he crossed the distance between us and wrapped his arms around me. "I hope that's not in fear of the blood alpha." Hearing his name aloud sent my heart racing even faster. Theren's mouth quirked into a crooked smile as he confirmed his own theory.

Before he could make a witty comment about it, the wrapped knocks resounded throughout the house.

"Fuck," I whispered. "Quiet enough so only Theren could hear me." He chuckled lowly.

"It's unlocked, cousin," Theren called out, and I watched in horror as the door knob slowly turned like I was in a horror film. Two figures stepped through the door, followed by three others. The two that entered first were clearly the blood alpha and Luna. Power radiated so strongly around both of them that I nearly thought I would pass out. I had never felt anything like that in my life. My wolf was practically begging me to get on my knees and bear my neck in submission. Theren, who stood next to me, squeezed my hand, which sent my wolf back under the surface of my consciousness.

"It's rude not to open the door for your guests," a tall man with a thick beard and long curly hair that fell to his shoulders chastised the blood alpha. His voice was so deep and rough that it sounded borderline animalistic. More frightening than his voice, his stature was immense. Theren was muscular, but this guy's muscles had muscles. Every slight movement sent ripples through his muscles, and I doubted he was even flexing. I was so shocked by his voice and hair that I almost didn't even notice. He wasn't wearing a shirt, only dark jeans and no shoes.

"I seem to recall that you're comfortable breaking down my door," Theren responded coolly. "Opening it should be much easier for you." Theren's words made the figure next to the blood alpha smirk.

I looked closer at the female. The blood Luna, no doubt. I was shocked by her physical appearance. She was tiny. Even though anyone would look small compared to the blood alpha, she looked small even compared to me. Even more shocking, her face was covered in scars. The most noticeable one went from the top of her eyebrow and went straight down her eye until about an inch and a half below it. The eye with the scar was completely white, which sent chills down my body. Did the blood alpha do that to her? Her hair was so blonde it was borderline silver, matching the eye that wasn't scarred. She wore a dark brown fur cloak, black leggings, and boots. Everything except for her head was covered. When I was done looking at her attire, I looked back at her face and saw that her gaze was on my mate. She had what I could only describe as a mischievous glint in her eye.

"Little one, do me a favor and go stand by the wall to your left."

"Okay," Theren asked me, his eyes matching the blood Luna's. I looked at him in confusion, but I did as he said and stood a few feet away from him. When I reached the wall, to my shock, the girl pulled a knife out of seemingly nowhere and sent it faster than humanly possible at my mate. I didn't even have time to scream. It happened so fast. Theren lifted his hand at the knife and used his magic to stop it just as the blade was about to pierce his palm. I exhaled, not realizing I had been holding my breath. My relief was short-lived as I saw Theren use his magic to turn the knife around and send it right back at the blood alpha's mate. My jaw dropped. The blood alpha would surely harm us all for Theren's actions. The knife was thrown so quickly that I was positive it would impale the girl in her face. However, she merely swiped the knife away before it sank into her as if it were a pesky mosquito.

"What the heck?" I looked at the blood alpha to gauge his reaction, but he looked disinterested in the scene in front of him, even though his mate was being attacked in front of his very eyes. Theren chuckled.

"Always a lovely greeting from you, Arriio," he said, and the girl winked in response.

"My confusion had never reached higher levels. You can come back, Nyx. Being near me is no longer a safety risk." Theren smirked at me and held his arm out for me to go in. Of course, I shakily walked over to him and he wrapped his arm around me and pulled me closer to him.

"Kynan Arriio, meet my mate, Onixa."

Chapter 12.

The Luna nodded her head once at me after Theren's introduction, and I gave her and Alpha Kynan a weak smile. The alpha stepped towards me and reached out his oversized hand. I shook it despite the fear that made my chest tighten. Unlike Theren's, the blood alpha's hands were calloused and rough. After I shook his hand, I shrank back closer to Theren, who tightened his arms around me. The blood alphas were looking at each other with a distant look in their eyes, showing that they were probably mind linking each other. Finally, Alpha Kynan spoke to Theren. He told him that Arriio wants to go for a walk with me alone. I felt my heart drop to the floor as my stomach tightened. What are the odds I walk away from this meeting unharmed? She seemed to have a penchant for throwing knives, and unlike Theren, there was no way I would be able to stop them from reaching me.

I could feel Theren shrug. "That sounds good to me. Ona, would you like that?" What was I supposed to say no with the two most powerful people I had ever met staring at me expectantly? As if reading my mind, Theren mind linked me. "You don't have to say yes. I can come up with an excuse to get you out of it if you're too scared." I considered his offer, but ultimately decided against it. After all, I'd better get used to the Bloodlake leaders since they would be around a while. Despite how skilled she was at wielding knives, did Theren trust the Luna enough to let us leave the pack house alone with no guards?

"No guards?" I turned in Theren's arms and asked in surprise, keeping my voice quiet. His smile turned up coyly.

"You won't need them, love," he answered for me, making me frown. How could he trust this girl so much? She looked like she was even younger than I. Theren tweaked my nose and gave me a not so subtle nudge towards the bloodlake members.

"Arriio and Kynan got the far away look in their eyes for a second longer, and then I could see Kynan visibly relax." "Alex, you're going with the females," he commanded, his deep voice nearly making the ground vibrate. An enormous man with dark blonde hair nodded in confirmation. To my surprise, he was nearly as big as Kynan. Jesus, how hard do the people in Bloodlake train? All of them appeared to be in peak physical condition. Even though I felt better about a guard coming with us, the man looked almost as intimidating as the blood alpha.

I turned to look back at Theren who gave me a reassuring smile and mind linked me. "Don't worry, little one. Arriio and Alex won't let any harm come to you. I trust them just as much as I trust my Beta and Gamma." Oh, Theren. He misunderstood my apprehension. I wasn't worried about external threats. I was concerned about the Bloodlake members. They looked so intimidating and unfriendly. Regardless of my anxiety, I knew I had to go. I wanted to make Theren proud.

I turned back to the Blood Lake members and saw the Luna give the alpha a passionate kiss. As bizarre as it sounds, I could swear I felt the room getting warmer. They finally broke apart and I could feel myself blushing. Their interactions were so intense, powerful.

"Be back by noon," Alpha Kynan commanded gruffly, and my wolf, no longer feeling the touch, could not resist the command of the blood alpha. To my horror, the Luna rolled her eyes. By God, did she have a death wish? I kept my eyes downcast in submission and subconsciously bared my neck.

"Go ahead and lead the way, Onixa. You probably know the territory better than Arriio or I," the buff blonde guy suggested. His voice wasn't nearly as horse as Alpha Kynan's. Maybe he wasn't as mean as he looked. I was surprised by his suggestion, but nodded anyway. I guided them out of the pack house and towards a field of dandelions and sunflowers that I had found while exploring with Leon before. We walked in silence for a while before Alex spoke again.

"So, what pack were you from?" he asked, keeping his tone light.

"I cringed. I was a rogue."

"Uh, the shameful rogue admission to the Luna and beta of a pack that was known to be ruthless towards rogues. And by brutal, I mean they didn't hesitate to deal with them harshly. You weren't originally from a pack?" Alex pressed and it began to feel like more of an interrogation than us casually chatting. Arriio of course stayed silent, but I could tell she was interested in the conversation.

"I don't talk about that," I flatly stated, letting ice creep into my tone. "Take the hint."

"Okay. Okay," he stated, holding his hands up as if I were going to attack him, as if he could break me like a twig. "Arriio told me to ask you, so don't get mad at me." I instantly felt bad for letting myself get harsh. That isn't me. Only a few minutes around Blood Lake and I was acting like an uncivilized savage. I smiled at Alex.

"I'm not mad and I really wasn't. I just don't talk about it. I'm sure there are plenty of things you wouldn't prefer to talk to me about, which I understand." Alex was silent for a moment, and I was worried that I had offended him until he spoke up again.

"Arriio said that you can ask her anything and she'll tell you about it." Alex spoke slowly as if he couldn't believe he was actually saying it. My eyebrows raised in surprise.

"Oh no, I couldn't do that and I really couldn't because I like my head being attached to my body because I'm quirky like that." Alex encouraged me.

"Arriio will tell you anything you want to know. That is quite an offer from the blood Luna." I considered his point. Well, he was right about it being an interesting offer. I doubt she opened up to many people, which made me suspicious of why she was opening up to me. Gradon always told me so many rumors about the Blood Lake Alpha and Luna, and I couldn't deny my curiosity, especially about one event in particular, the well, you know how when I decided to just spit it out and instantly regretted saying what I said next, the rumor about the punishment. My eyes widened.

"Holy cow. This is how it ends for me. You can't just bring up someone's mate punishing them, Onixa." Then again, maybe she would tell me it was just a silly rumor spread by jealous wolves. After all, it didn't look like Alpha Kynan was violent towards her. Quite the opposite, actually.

"Arriio offered to take the punishment for someone else." Alex emphasized the last two words for some unclear reason, and the alpha had to follow through or he would seem weak. I was surprised by the admission. I surely had thought that they would say it was made up. Who would allow their mate to be mistreated like that? Despite how little I knew Arriio, she did not seem like the type of wolf to back down from a fight. So, I told her that I disagreed with that. Alex gave some explanation for why alphas have to assert their dominance in packs, but it honestly still made no sense to me. I couldn't ever imagine Theren harming me in any way. Even if I tried to take a punishment for someone else, there was no way he would allow that. He barely even lets people touch me in training.

"We're here," I said in relief, glad for the distraction. The last thing I wanted to do was get into an ethics debate with members of the Blood Lake Pack. I looked at the sunflowers and dandelions and smiled.

"You like flowers?" Alex asked as if I had just told him I drink a quart of gasoline every day. My grin widened at the beta. Who doesn't like flowers? Surely, even the most intense of wolves couldn't deny how happy flowers make people. He opened his mouth, but quickly shut it when the Luna glared at him. Instead, he surprised me by asking an unrelated random question.

"Arriio wants to know why you're scared of Alpha Kynan." I choked on the air in surprise.

"Oh. Um," and continued speaking when he reassured me that it was okay to say whatever I wanted to. "Well, for one, the rumor about the punishment. Two, because Bloodlake kills a lot of rogues. Three, have you seen him? He's enormous." I laughed awkwardly when Arriio's expression darkened, and Alex looked guilty.

"What was that about?" Before I could ask, the two wolves immediately looked alert. The Luna surveyed the field, and I could see her back straighten in preparation. Preparation for what?

"Luna. Alex began, his eyes widening. Arriio pulled a knife out of Madair again, and I knew that I was so totally screwed.

Chapter 13.

To my surprise, the blood Luna didn't even look at me. She and Alex made eye contact and he nodded at her.

"Onixa, you need to get down on the ground. Keep your head low. We're under a chemical attack," Alex commanded. And I quickly dropped to the floor. Even though I couldn't see anything, despite the air looking slightly more cloudy, suddenly I felt burning in my nostrils and tried to inhale as little as possible. Out of nowhere, seven men wearing gas masks began to form a circle around Alex, Arriio, and me. The blood Luna didn't hesitate to throw the knife in her hand at one of them, and then quickly summoned another one, which went into another masked man. To my disbelief, Alex's whole arm turned into metal. He punched the man in front of him with tremendous force, and I heard the sound of his body hitting the ground. As for me, I felt debilitated entirely by whatever chemical they sprayed into the air. I was now coughing and could barely move except to writhe in pain. It felt like I was suffocating. Alex didn't look like he was doing too well either. After he took down the man, he began to cough and I could see his face scabbing. He began to fight another man and sent one punch to his face with enough force that his opponent collapsed. Arriio, however, looked to be resisting the chemical better, presumably because she is an alpha. She stabbed yet another masked man and made it look effortless. Unfortunately, five more men took the places of the ones who had fallen. Alex swayed slightly before falling to his knees. Blood poured out of his nose. I felt a wetness under my eyes. And to my surprise, it was blood that was seeping out of my eye sockets. Well, I guess this is how it ends. The chemical was making my thoughts extremely hazy as I could only focus on the pain. I watched Arriio take down man after man, and at one point, I thought I saw her strike a fatal blow to a man in a hazmat suit with a backpack on. It was hard to tell what was real and what wasn't, especially since I could feel myself slipping in and out of consciousness. Arriio was covered in blood. When she began to walk towards me, I wanted to scream in fear, but found myself unable to. Instead of harming me, she picked me up and ran a few yards. Immediately, I found myself able to breathe in again without pain. Arriio dropped me on the ground and ran back into the foggy air where she helped Alex off his feet and supported his weight as they walked. When they got back to where I was standing, I could see Alex breathe in deeply with relief. His scabbing began to heal. The Luna bent down to where I was on the ground and grabbed my face. She tilted it, inspecting me for injuries, I suppose. She then grabbed my hands, which were covered in blisters from whatever chemical had been used. She grunted, but didn't seem too concerned, so I figured I shouldn't be either. To my horror, I saw blood dripping out of her nose.

"Arriio," I coughed, my chest still hurting. "Your nose?" She looked at me in confusion, but put her hand up to her nose and looked at the blood. She just shrugged, seeming uninterested and unbothered. Alex appeared to be doing fine, too.

"We have to go back and tell Kynan and Theren." Arriio whipped her head back to look at Alex and glared at him. Their eyes went glossy and it seemed they were arguing over a mind link.

"Let's go then," Alex said, motioning towards me. "When I tried to stand up, my legs felt like jelly and I just crumpled to the ground. Here, I got you." Alex picked me up and cradled me. Arriio took the lead, taking us back to the pack house, and I subconsciously noted that it was interesting that she remembered her way back.

When we reached the pack house, the blood alpha and the other bloodlake wolves stood up from their various seats in the living room.

"What happened?" Alpha Kynan growled and stalked towards us. He grabbed Arriio roughly by the shoulders and examined her. He then ripped off her fur cloak and checked for any other injuries. Theren was in front of me in no time, and Alex handed me over to him. He was not nearly as rough as Alpha Kynan and when he examined me for injuries. He frowned when he saw my blistered hands and wiped the dried blood from under my eyes.

"Are you okay, little one?" he murmured, inhaling my scent deeply, and I felt him visibly relax after. I just nodded, not trusting my voice yet. That chemical really did a number on me.

"Alex, what happened?" Theren asked, repeating the blood alpha's earlier question.

"Wolfsbane gas. We were attacked by 15 men. None got away," Alex answered, cringing.

Alpha Kynan roared. The sound sending echoes throughout the house. "This pack isn't safe. Arriio, you're coming back to Blood Lake with me." Arriio's face instantly darkened, and she snarled at him. My mouth nearly fell to the floor. Oh boy, they're inside. Arriio sank into a fighting stance. As she clenched her fists, I couldn't help but notice how strong she is. Since Alpha Kynan took off her cloak and left her in a cropped tank top, I could see her body much more clearly. Her abs were clearly defined, and if I counted correctly, she had an eight-pack. What kind of training did she do? Alpha Kynan's eyes darkened, and I'll be damned if he didn't square up to fight his mate. Arriio summoned a knife and threw it at her mate without hesitating for a second. The action was so quick, I would have missed it if I blinked. Her actions seemingly pissed him off more, but he flicked the knife away without a second thought. I assumed he would just be taking defensive measures against his mate, but I was proved wrong by what he did next. I saw his wrist flick and a ball of fire appeared in his hand. His gift was fire. I couldn't explain it, but this somehow made perfect sense to him. To my shock, he threw the ball of fire at his mate. I exhaled in relief when she lifted her leg up and swung it in a wide arc at the fire, extinguishing it. Arriio crossed the distance between them and threw a punch at Kynan, who dodged it and threw one back at her side. Arriio blocked it and twisted his wrist. I nearly threw up at the sound. I had heard way too many bones break today. He didn't seem bothered by the injury and just threw a punch with his other hand at her jaw, which she ducked from and swept her leg at his feet, trying to take him off balance. He stumbled slightly, but instead used her position to stomp on her ankle, which also snapped.

"Theren, aren't you going to do something?" I whispered in a panic, trying to understand why he was letting them fight. He shrugged, looking bored.

"Just enjoy the show, little one." I was shocked by his blasé attitude towards the violence, but I couldn't peel my eyes away. Arriio got up slightly unbalanced from her ankle, but threw yet another punch at the blood alpha. She was somewhat too slow, and he caught her by her fist. He twisted her around so that she had her arm pinned behind her back, and she was facing away from Kynan. Her eyes were glowing silver, which I assumed meant her wolf was at the surface. Alpha Kynan's eyes were pitch black. She did a front flip to get out of Alpha Kynan's grip, and I flinched when I heard her shoulder pop loudly as it did a 360° rotation. Now, a few feet away from Kynan, her canines lowered as she grabbed her shoulder and jerked it, re-breaking the bones so they would heal properly. I had never seen anything like her in my life. She summoned a small, thin blade and sent it into her mate, who growled as he removed it from his abdomen. It healed almost as soon as he pulled it out.

"That is enough, Arriio," he snarled at her and I cowered closer to Theren, clutching his shirt tighter. He squeezed me in reassurance. He stalked towards her and wrapped his arms around her. This must have caught her off guard because she was a few moments too slow to react. She kicked and thrashed in his grip, but he tightened his arms around her and maneuvered her so that he was cradling her. When Arriio continued to struggle, the blood alpha's canines descended. They were monstrous. He sank them into Arriio's neck, whose body relaxed after. He didn't remove them from her neck. He kept them there as he walked them up the pack house stairs and out of sight.

"Anyways, what would you like for dinner, love?" Theren asked me apathetically.

Chapter 14.

"Is he going to hurt her?" I asked Theren, blinking up at him in complete shock. He was acting like he didn't just witness an alpha and his Luna fighting. Theren did an awkward cough laugh with an amused twinkle in his eyes.

"They didn't go up there to fight, little one." My mouth made an O shape as I caught on to what he was implying. I must have been blushing, but I suppose Theren decided to take pity on me and not comment on it.

"She killed so many people," I whispered to Theren in a hushed tone as my arms tightened around him. Theren winced.

"Yes, it was necessary. I would have done the same."

"You don't get it, Theren. She killed the wolves like it was nothing. I saw her take someone down without hesitation," I insisted, not sure if he was quite grasping the severity of what I was trying to tell him.

"Ah, yes. That is her go-to move," Theren said disinterestedly, and my mouth went agape. At my expression, he sighed. "Look, little one. I'm sorry you had to see that because I know violence upsets you, but I can't say I'm sorry it went down like that. I owe Arriio immensely for all she's doing for us."

"All she's doing for us?" I questioned.

"Of course, she's the one training you for the challenge. That's why Kynan is so on edge. He's leaving his mate here so she can train you," he explained. I winced. Oh, frick. I really needed to catch my assumptions better next time. I had assumed that Alpha Kynan was the one who was here to train me.

"Don't worry," Theren said, tucking my hair behind my ear. "She won't be as tough with you as she was with Kynan." I was about to ask him if he was sure about that because anyone who could break an alpha's wrist and stab him without flinching surely has no boundaries when a knock on the front door interrupted.

"Come in," Theren called out and moved us to sit on one of the couches in the living room, orienting me so I was sitting up in his lap. A small elderly man walked through the doors and approached us.

"Alpha Luna," he murmured and ducked his head in submission. "Technically, I wasn't the Luna yet, hopefully. But I didn't have the heart to correct the old man. He was so cute and looked like a baby turtle."

"Onixa, this is the best pack healer in North America, Milo." Theren grinned at the old man who returned a toothy smile.

"What do we have here?" Milo asked, inspecting my hands as he squinted. "Wolfsbane exposure. It doesn't look like it penetrated deep into the skin, so I'm assuming it was a low concentration. Perhaps in gas form." Milo's warm, wrinkled hands were incredibly soft and felt nice, even on my tender flesh.

"Correct as always, Milo," Theren confirmed. "What can you do about it?" Milo made an unintelligible comment as he sorted through his leather bag. He pulled out a tiny mason jar containing a green substance. He opened the jar and rubbed a small amount on my hands. Instantly, the blisters began to shrink and the skin burned less.

"Very good," Theren muttered with a smile. "Just put it on again at night and you'll be good as new," Luna. I nodded and couldn't help but giggle at the cute little man. Strange but adorable.

"Thank you, Milo. It was a pleasure as always." Theren nodded at him and he scurried out of the door like a little mouse. When he was gone, Theren chuckled.

"He's a little odd, but I've known him since I was a child and he's healed me more times than I can count." I was about to ask more questions about healers when Alpha Kynan and Arriio descended from the staircase. As they got closer, I could see the fresh bite marks on her neck, with some even having a tiny bit of blood left over.

"My apologies for threatening to take Arriio back," Alpha Kynan gruffly stated. "Of course, it would be her honor to train your future, Luna." He always sounded so serious, and I wasn't sure if he meant his words or not. Theren, however, seemed to believe he was being genuine.

"No worries, cousin," Theren said. Alpha Kynan's gaze shifted to me and I instantly stiffened and subconsciously cringed back into Theren.

"Are you okay?"

"Yes," I said, hoping he got the answer he wanted. Thankfully, his attention turned back to Theren.

"Theren, you should have a pack doctor check her out just in case," Kynan suggested, and my heart warmed slightly at his words. Despite the rumors I've heard about the blood alpha, he didn't seem to be so bad. After all, it seemed like his mate had initiated the violence that ensued. Theren looked irritated at being told how to care for me, and it showed in his rolling eyes.

"I did while you and your mate were occupied."

"Occupied?" I frowned, unsure what he meant, but the discomfort in his tone made me realize he wasn't happy.

"I got a healing salve from my pack's best healer," Theren elaborated. "Her hands are good as new." Kynan didn't respond. Instead, he looked at his mate irritately. She glared at him and he glared back as their eyes went glossy. Theren noticed as well and called them out.

"Seriously, are you guys already arguing again?" Kynan shifted his glare to Theren, and I couldn't help the giggle that escaped my mouth. That wolf's pain must have gone to my head because I would never dare to do that under normal circumstances.

"Is something funny, little wolf?" Alpha Kynan asked me, his eyes softening slightly. Digging myself into a deeper hole, I responded, "Actually, yes."

"What Theren said was funny because you do both argue a lot from what I can tell." And may the moon goddess help me because I giggled once more. I saw Alpha Kynan's lips turn upward for a millisecond, something I never thought I would see in my lifetime.

"Yes, I do suppose we fight a lot." I had to bite my lip from laughing again. What a bizarre couple those two are. Strangely, I could see how it worked. Imagining the blood alpha with any other girl was a terrifying thought.

"Oh, but when I say that, you threatened to rip my spine out and beat me with it," Theren scoffed, but I could tell he was amused. The wheels in my brain started spinning.

"I mean, logistically, is that even possible?" I asked Kynan for confirmation, and to my disappointment, it wasn't really that feasible.

"Seriously, what were you guys arguing about?" Theren intrusively asked and played with a piece of my hair.

"God, Theren, you can't just ask alpha mates who try to fight each other what they're arguing about. It's rude."

"Training," Alpha Kynan answered, making my ears perk up in interest. "My mate seems to think that it would be prudent to train her starting now."

"No," Theren immediately rejected the idea, which made Arriio send him daggers with her eyes.

"Why?" I whined. I wasn't particularly a fan of training. Still, I couldn't deny the incredible opportunity of getting to train with the blood Luna, especially after seeing how effortlessly she could take down enemies.

"Onixa," Theren said sternly, "My full name, and I knew he was about to lay into me. In case you forgot, you were nearly poisoned to death a few hours ago. You are not doing anything remotely active until tomorrow at the earliest, and that's only if the pack doctor clears you." I glared at him. What a fun sponge.

"Don't start with me on this, Onixa. This is not a battle you will win," Theren said, and the warning was clear. I had never heard him sound so stern, so I decided not to push him on the issue. His eyes softened when I nodded, and he squeezed my hand.

"Who's hungry?" he asked. The rest of the night went by surprisingly smoothly. The Blue Moon and Bloodlake wolves meshed surprisingly well, and it actually appeared that they knew each other well. I thought it was sweet and when I told Theren so, he rolled his eyes at me but agreed. The only issue was the gamma of Bloodlake, Lucian. He was nearly as big as Alpha Kynan and just as serious. At least Kynan attempted to talk to me. Lucian rarely spoke, even to the bloodlake wolves. I had to admit, I felt much better with the bloodlake wolves around than I thought. I had assumed all of them were bloodthirsty, but the only one who really initiated any violence so far was Arriio. She was also incredibly stoic and obviously didn't talk, but I could see a slight softness present only when she was touching Kynan. Obviously, I would never tell her that because I prefer my heart to be an internal organ rather than an external one.

"I like them," I told Theren as I crawled into bed for the night once the festivities were over. "They're nice."

"Did I or did I not tell you not to worry?" Theren teased me and tweaked my nose.

"You did, however, neglect to tell me that the alpha and Luna almost fight each other every hour." I couldn't help but smile. It wasn't funny as they were arguing due to the sheer intensity they could both possess, but they always seemed to come to some agreement. Theren shrugged.

"It's way more fun when you see it the first time."

"How did they meet?" I asked, but my eyes were heavy with drowsiness. Theren chuckled as he pulled me onto his bare chest.

"I'll tell you about it another time, little one. You should go to sleep. I'm sure Arriio will be waking you up bright and early for training." I grumbled.

"Yeah, cuz I love being woken up at the crack of dawn to have my ass kicked." Despite my trepidation about the approaching training session, I couldn't deny that after meeting the fiery competent Luna, I slept much better with renewed hope that I wouldn't be harmed in the challenge.

Chapter 15.

I woke up to a sharp hit on the head. "Uggh," I groaned and grabbed my face, still too sleepy to open my eyes.

"If you don't open your eyes in the next 2 seconds, the next hit is going directly into your kidney." A feminine voice that I didn't recognize filled my head. My eyes instantly opened and I was confused.

"When Arriio stood above me. How are you in my head?" I asked, my brain still fuzzy.

"The old healer guy made some potion that makes me able to mind link with you and a separate one for the rest of the pack," Arriio explained.

"Why did you have to hit me to wake me up?" I grumbled. "Uh, good morning, Onixa. How did you sleep? Would have sufficed." One side of Arriio's mouth quirked up into a smile.

"Get ready for training. If you're not down in 5 minutes, I'll keep that in mind when we're sparring." With those words, she left the room. Did she threaten me? I quickly got up to get dressed, not willing to risk making the blood Luna angry. As I was putting my hair up into a bun, there appeared behind

"Where's the fire?" he asked sarcastically, referring to my frantic dressing.

"It'll be under my ass if I don't meet the blood Luna downstairs in a minute," I told Theren as I quickly tied my running shoes.

Theren frowned. "You have no reason to fear Arriio. She wouldn't harm you. She knows I would kill her."

I snorted. Good luck dealing with the blood alpha.

He roughly grabbed my shoulder and spun me around, so I was pinned to his chest. "I do not fear the blood alpha or Luna. Regardless, neither of them will hurt you. Ariseio knows how precious you are to me. She'll be gentle," Theen promised, and gave a quick kiss on my head.

I nodded, but I wasn't sure if I agreed. Theren didn't see her fight without hesitation. "Seriously, Onixa, I will never let someone harm you." Theren's voice was distinctly deeper, and his green eyes were glowing bright.

"Fine, but I shouldn't be late," I said breathlessly. "I had never seen him so intense before." His gaze burned through me for a few seconds longer before he released me from his grasp.

I went downstairs where Arriio was standing with Alex, leaving Theren behind. "Is the blood alpha coming?" I asked.

She shook her head. He had already left with the blood like wolves. Alex is just staying to babysit.

I scoffed before responding through the mind link. "I find it hard to believe that you need a babysitter."

Arriio cracked a brief smile, but her eyes held a mischievous glint. "Try telling that to Cynan."

I rolled my eyes as I smiled. Yeah, right. He was the last person in the world I would ever start an argument with.

Alex interjected. "What is Arrizio telling you? Did she call me a glorified babysitter?"

I couldn't hold my giggle in. "Seriously, Luna?" Alex whined. "I'm the beta of Bloodlake. You got to stop telling people that I'm a babysitter."

Aio smirked but said nothing else. She started to head out the door. We walked in silence towards the training center.

"Luna, can I ask something?" I finally asked.

"Please stop calling me Luna. If you manage not to get killed during the challenge, you'll be a Luna, too. It's Aizio," she demanded. "But yes, ask."

"Did you really take down all of those wolves in the field?" I asked, my voice lowering. I had to make sure that it wasn't my wolf's bane contaminated mind hallucinating it.

"Yes," she answered.

"How? How are you so strong?" I questioned, my curiosity deepening.

She sighed and didn't answer for a minute. "That's a long story, Onixa. We'll talk about it another time. Let's say I'm not a normal Luna."

"Is that why people call you an alpha?" I mumbled and she abruptly stopped walking to look at me.

"Something like that," she muttered before picking up her pace and walking faster. I could tell she didn't feel like talking about it, but luckily I specialize in asking intrusive questions.

"Have you ever accidentally hurt someone because you didn't realize your strength?" I asked quietly, having flashbacks to dissolving Kilmore's entire arm.

"No," she answered without doubt or hesitation. "Everyone I've hurt, it's because I wanted to." I winced, not wanting to know how many people she's actually caused harm to. I felt nauseated thinking about the way she took down people yesterday.

"Are you asking because you have?" Alex asked, and I almost forgot he was trailing behind us, listening to our conversation. My heartbeat quickened. He couldn't possibly know about what I did to Kilmore.

"No," I answered, and I knew I responded too quickly.

"My mistake," Alex muttered, backing off.

"Oh, goody. We're here." I sighed in relief. I pushed open the doors to the training center where Clevette was punching the crap out of a punching bag. She looked up as we walked in and wiped the sweat off her forehead as she headed towards us. When she reached us, I introduced her to Arriio and Alex.

"It's an honor to meet you, Luna." Clovette tilted her neck in submission. Arisio nodded at her. Both her and Clovette's eyes went glossy, so I assumed they were mind-linging.

"Onixa, dear normal warm-up," Clovette commanded. I internally groaned. That meant a 5mile jog around the indoor track, 500 crunches, and 300 push-ups. Nevertheless, I shrugged off my jacket and began running.

To my surprise, Alex joined me. "Don't tell me you like to run," I groaned at him.

He snorted. "We're moving so slowly. It's basically walking at this point."

"Hey," I protested. "I'm just warming up." He laughed and jogged faster so that he was a little bit ahead of me. I scowled, knowing he was doing that so I would feel challenged and try to catch up, proving a point. Obviously, I'm easily manipulated because I played into it anyway and ran faster until he was by my side. We stayed at that pace for a while and even though it was harder, it wasn't unbearable.

While we ran, Arriio and Clovette stretched and took turns holding the punching bag with one of them hitting it. I wouldn't be surprised if they became best friends. Clovette was also exceptionally intense. However, it seemed like Clevette was more controlled. Arriio just screams chaos.

When I finished the 5 miles with Alex, we lay on the ground and did the crunches. I could tell that this was a baby workout for him. He didn't even break a sweat. I wasn't surprised by that. When we arrived in the training center, he took off his hoodie and revealed a literal eightpack.

By the time I was finished with the push-ups, I felt like I was dying. I groaned as I lay face down on the ground.

"Get up," I heard's voice resonating in my mind. "I want to see you spar with Clovette."

Clovette, dressed in running shorts and a tank top, looked as menacing as ever. Her dark brown hair was pulled back into one long French braid, and her quad muscles flexed threateningly as she walked near me. I got up off the ground and stood across from Clovette. Arriio folded her arms across her chest. She didn't remove her black cloak, making her look all the more intimidating. Her face showed no emotion while Alex's eyebrows were furrowed as he looked on with interest.

I sighed, already knowing I was about to get my butt kicked in front of the Luna and Beta of Bloodlake. Nevertheless, I still got into my fighting stance as Clevette did the same. Clevette made the first move and swung her right fist at me. Jumping backwards, I narrowly dodged it. She sent a kick towards my torso, which I pushed away using my hands. As soon as both of her feet were back on the ground, she sent another punch at me, which connected with my jaw. I had the feeling she was holding back because it didn't even hurt that badly. However, it did distract me enough that she was able to knock me off my feet and pin me.

I groaned as I hit the floor and Clevette rolled off of me. I stared up at Arriio, whose eyes were narrowed. She looked back and forth from me to Clevette. When she looked at Clevette, her eyes glossed over. "Of course, I went easy on her," Clovette answered a mind link I didn't hear. "He would kill me if I harmed her. He's already punished me once for being too rough."

Arisio looked back at me. "Do you have a problem if you get injured while training with me?"

I gulped. "No, Luna."

She smiled, a chaotic glint in her eye that made my stomach turn. "Very well, then. I'll let know that we'll be doing this my way from now on." She must have told Clovette because protested, "Luna, with all due respect, therein is quite overprotective of his mate. I'm not sure you want to put that to the test."

Arisio's smile faltered as she began minding with Clovette once again. Neither of them spoke aloud, indicating that they were probably arguing over the mind link. I looked at Alex, who shrugged. He was probably used to the blood Luna starting arguments. She didn't seem like the type to hold back her opinion, which was admirable.

"Okay, Onixa. The Luna will train you as she sees fit," Clovette agreed hesitantly. I grinned. Despite being terrified of Aizio, I knew that she was the most capable fighter in the world. And if I wanted to have the chance to destroy Brenda, I would need her to be completely unfiltered and unrestrained.

Alex cracked his neck and stretched his arm across his chest as he walked towards Arriio. Arriio removed her cloak, revealing a black sports bra that matched her black leggings. She haphazardly pulled her long platinum hair back into a ponytail. She cracked her knuckles as she and Alex stood across from each other. Alex glinted with excitement in his eyes, and I felt worried for the blood Luna. I was sure that her beta would not harm her, but he did look like he could easily crush her. That's no insult to the Luna. In fact, she is quite muscular herself. She also has defined abs, and even her arms looked formidable. However, Alex is just four times her size.

"Three," Alex began counting, and I saw Arriio's canines drop as she smiled threateningly at him. "Two." Alex sank lower into his fighting stance and his body tensed, revealing even more muscle definition. "One."

Chapter 16. Without hesitating, Arriio leapt at Alex and punched him squarely in the jaw. I flinched at the sound her fist connecting with his face made. Even more unnerving, her face was aloof, as if she didn't just punch a beta right in the head. Alex growled and threw a punch back with such ferocity that I was sure it would send her flying through the air. However, Arisio sidestepped it as if Alex were a child. The beta's eyes darkened and his canines descended as he said in a growly voice, "It's unfortunate for you that Kynan isn't here to reprimand me for beating the crap out of his mate."

My jaw dropped. He just threatened the blood Luna as if he were merely stating what the weather outside was like. Aizio grinned in response. Despite grins usually looking friendly, hers just looked like she was ready to overpower him. Alex sent a punch into her stomach, which the Luna blocked with ease. However, it looked like most of her force was concentrated on keeping his fist at bay because she didn't do anything to stop him from kicking her ankle. She fell to the ground and her ankle was twisted at an angle that made me look away. The bone appeared to be nearly ready to break through the skin. Even though Arriio was clearly incapacitated, Alex was cruel in sitting on her torso and reaching to pin her arms down as if she had any chance of getting back up. Before he could restrain her arms, she swiftly poked his eyes with her fingers. I gasped as Alex groaned and immediately covered his eyes with his hands. Arisio used this as an opportunity to punch his chest. And despite the fact that the beta looked like the Hulk, the force from the punch pushed him off of her as if he were a rag doll. Ariseio jumped off the ground from her back and adjusted her ankle so that it was facing normally. Alex was still recovering from the assault on his eyes and Arriio kicked him in the ribs with her injured foot. He stumbled over and Arriio put the final blow in when she gently shoved him to the ground and pinned him.

"Poor Alex," he groaned. "I'll get you next time, Arriio. Count on it."

As Arriio turned towards me, I was sure that I was as pale as a ghost. Watching the sheer intensity they used against each other was overwhelming. When she asked me what I learned, I told her that she fights hard. I mean, who tries poking out their beta's eyes during a friendly match of sparring? Alex thanked me for taking his side inadvertently. But the Luna mind linked me. "It's not fighting dirty. It's using every weapon in your arsenal. You'd be foolish to think that in your battle, the female won't do whatever it takes to end you." Her tone was so resolute that it made my heart sink to the bottom of my stomach. She wasn't wrong. I had witnessed Brenda's cruelty firsthand and had no doubt she would do anything to destroy me.

The Luna held out a knife, which I took with much apprehension. "Let's spar."

"I want you to do whatever it takes to hurt me," she said, making my jaw drop once more. "First of all, I had seen the way she spars, and I quite happen to like my eyes being fully functional. Secondly, it wasn't fair for me to have a weapon when she didn't."

"Luna, with all due respect, I can't stab you," I mumbled. "The last thing I need is the blood alpha putting my head on a stick."

"No, you can't. But you should try," she ordered. Every word she spoke was factual, leaving no room for subjectivity or objections. I tried to plead my case to Alex, but before he could back me up, Arriio ripped the knife out of my hand, and I braced for the sparring I was sure to get. However, she just turned the knife on herself while rolling her eyes and cut into her flesh on her face. I covered my mouth in shock. Is she out of her mind? However, just as quickly as she had injured herself, the wound closed, and I commented on her being insane, which she merely shrugged off. She had a mischievously dangerous glint in her eye that I had only ever seen before in Theron. The Luna seemed pretty indestructible, so I took the knife with renewed faith that I wouldn't be able to hurt her even if I stabbed her in the heart. "Seriously, Onixa, nothing is off limits. I'll be disappointed if you don't hurt me," she said apathetically. Yep, she's psychotic.

Alex counted down and when he said go, I waited for her first move. It didn't come. Arriio mind linked me and advised me to attack first for the element of surprise. I lunged immediately after she told me, and the Luna dodged it effortlessly. "Faster attacks. Be decisive. Don't overthink. If even one of your motions is hesitant, you're dead," Arriio deadpanned. And I almost snorted aloud. Yeah, right. Me, not overthink. Arriio kicked powerfully at my hand, which both disarmed the knife from my hand while making my wrist snap back unnaturally. I hissed at the pain, but decided to take a page out of Luna's handbook and keep on punching after being wounded. Unfortunately, she grabbed my fist in midair, and before I knew it, my arm was twisted behind my back. "Boom! You're dead!" She snarled venomously and my wolf is infuriated momentarily. I tried punching her more, but she clearly has the upper hand and pins me after bruising my ribs and ankle during her assaults. "Boom! Dead." Her voice taunts me once more. And for the first time, I think about hurting the blood Luna. The training was no doubt a failure, and I walked away with substantial injuries that I swore to myself Theren would never find out about.

Arriio and I chatted about a multitude of subjects such as Theren and Grayson on the way back. After having seen how durable the blood Luna is, I felt much more comfortable around her, well aware that she wasn't the sensitive type, nor the type to cry to the blood alpha if something went wrong. When we got to the pack house, we were still on the topic of Gradon. It reminded me that I need to try to reach out to him, see if he's okay. I felt consumed with guilt for being so self-involved with the challenge that I didn't put much thought into my old friend.

My nightmares became a reality when Arizio crashed into my least favorite pack member. Brenda ricocheted off of Arriio as if she were a bouncy ball thrown against a brick wall. Brenda scowled from the floor and before looking up says in her trademark voice, "Watch where you're going."

"Oh." Brenda got up and looked Arriio up and down before turning to me. "I see you finally found someone creepy enough to be friends with you." Uh oh. X2. Ariseio had nearly overpowered Alex, and that was somewhat of a friendly interaction. My heartbeat quickened as I imagined how Arriio would respond to such disrespect. I looked down in shame at the pack member who berated both me and the foreign Luna. Brenda kept pressing on, trying to get a reaction from me forio, but I couldn't say. "It's unfortunate that she'll be all alone once I beat you in 3 weeks. Who are you anyways?" She questioned, her eyes narrowing at the blood Luna.

Aizio smiles, and her eyes are a glow with that violent, mischievous trademark associated with her and Theren. Ariseio must not be the quick to anger type because she said nothing. "Hello, I asked you a question," Brenda commanded, solidifying her death sentence by waving her hand in front of the blood Luna as if she were an invalid. Arriio caught Brenda's hand swiftly without hesitation. She also did not hesitate to squeeze, her grip firm and unyielding. When I thought the encounter was over, Arriio broke Brenda's wrist. Brenda screamed, but Arriio's grip didn't loosen. Arriio held her neck with one hand and her other hand was casually hanging by her side. Arriio must have told her of her identity because Brenda went from blood red to ghastly white. "I'm sorry, Luna," she choked out in between gasps. The blood Luna snared and my heart almost jumps out of my chest as I see her glowing silver eyes and long canines. She looked more wolf than human in that moment. And that very image of her would be the star of my nightmares for many nights thereafter. Brenda was crying and Arriio finally let go of her grip, allowing her to leave the kitchen in a tearful frenzy.

When Arriio questioned why I let her speak to me like that, I couldn't help but flood the floodgates of emotions as I told her about Brenda previously hurting me when the wasn't around. When the Luna reassured me that she would make sure Brenda was dealt with by the end of the challenge, I couldn't help the sinking feeling in my stomach as I recalled the repulsion I felt even watching Arriio subdue my rival. That sinking feeling stayed with me for the rest of the day, even when Alex watched Marvel movies with Arriio and me. I showered before Theren arrived for dinner, being sure to cover the bruises when I were dressed.

At dinner, the listened closely to my account of what happened at the training. He looked impassive and I couldn't detect any emotion on his face. We bid Arriio and Alex good night who went to their guest bedrooms.

Back in Theren's bedroom, I sighed as I sat on the corner of his bed. He had just gotten out of the shower and a pair of sweatpants hung lowly on his hips. It took everything in me not to look at the sight of his defined muscles as he walked towards where I was located on the bed. My cheeks burned as I saw the look in his eye, one of knowing. The corner of his mouth was turned up into a slight cocky smile.

"You know, little one," Theren casually said as he tucked a piece of hair behind my ear, standing up in front of me. "What do they say about staring?"

"That mischievous look in his eye, the exact copy of the one that Arriio possesses, makes his green eyes glow." I gulped, feeling uneasy in front of him. I inadvertently scooted away from the edge of the bed, further from where he stood. His raw power made my wolf feel ready to bolt at any moment. His actions only made his dangerous smirk deepen and I truly felt vulnerable in that moment.

"They say," he drawled and my breathing hitched as he reached his hand out to my face. "It's very rude." He caressed my cheek before moving his hand to the side of my neck. It sent a chill down my spine and Theren growled lowly as his eyes continued to glow into the brightest green the first had ever seen. He bent down and pressed a chased kiss against my lips. I made a noise of disappointment and I could feel his cocky grin widen as he went in for another kiss. The kiss deepened as I opened my mouth and he flicked his tongue inside. He growled and grabbed my wrist, pulling me closer into him. This wouldn't have particularly been a problem, except it was the wrist that I'm pretty sure Arriio sprained. I couldn't help the yelp of pain that escaped my mouth. He swiftly pulled away in concern.

"I'm sorry. Was I too rough?" he asked as he released my wrist.

I shook my head, answering too quickly. "No, you just surprised me as all." He narrowed his eyes, but before he could read too much into it, I captured his lips with mine, and we began kissing again, though I was careful to keep my injured wrist away. With my uninjured hand, I took this opportunity to feel his muscles beneath it. I could feel every groove in between the harsh abdominal lines. Growling, he too used this as an opportunity to explore my torso. When he reached my ribs, I hissed in pain. He pulled away once more and I looked at him in guilt.

"You're hurt," he snarled, and it wasn't a question.

"Physically, yes. Technically, yes," I began, but before I could defend Ario, he transformed his hand so that he had claws. Swiftly and in one motion, he shredded my shirt down the middle, leaving me in only a bra. I would have been self-conscious, but his blackened eyes narrowed in on the dark purple bruises around my rib cage. He snarled again viciously, but gently grabbed my wrist, and when my face contorted in pain, it confirmed that he knew it was also injured.

"Arriio," Theren hissed, his eyes flashing dangerously, he stood up, his frame slightly shaking.

"Theren, please," I started, but his canines descended, and a pointed look from him shut me up. He stalked towards the door, and I hurly got off the bed and chased after him. When I grabbed his hand when he was about to open the door, he turned around, and the malicious look in his eyes made my blood run cold.

"Stay here," he commanded so dominantly. My wolf had no choice but to instantaneously submit and go back to the bed and watch helplessly as the went out the door to confrontio presumably and it was all my fault.

Chapter 17. By the time the got back, my anxiety was so bad I thought I was going to faint. He walked into the room, his hand covering one side of his abdomen. I immediately saw the blood seeping out from where his hand was placed.

"Oh my god," I cried out as I rushed to him. He didn't stop me as I removed his hand, uncovering his wound. My stomach lurched as I saw a deep gash that was slightly green.

"What happened?" I questioned, and his eyes met mine cooly.

"The blood Luna happened," he muttered as he went into the bathroom and returned a minute later with a wet towel, alcohol, and gauze.

"Is she okay?" My heartbeat raced.

The paused. "She's fine. I deserve this to be fully honest."

"You attacked her," I stated. Theren just nodded. I growled. "You can't harm the person who's trying to save my life."

Theren sighed as he held the wet towel on his wound, cleaning up the blood. "I know. I regret it. I shouldn't have let my wolf take over like that. I'm still getting used to the mate bond," he admitted.

I looked at him in sympathy. I hadn't really considered that he must be feeling all kinds of internal struggle due to the bond. "Well," I finally spoke. "I'm glad she taught your lesson."

Theren snorted. "I can always count on the blood Luna to put me in my place." Something about his words made my stomach turn. As he cleaned and dressed his wounds, and even right up until the moment I fell asleep, I couldn't help but feel unnerved about a wolf that didn't hesitate to fight an alpha.

From the moment I woke up, I knew that the blood Luna was going to make me regret not being ready. I had slept in far too long. I could tell as soon as I awoke. She had warned me that if I was late to training, she would make me regret it. I quickly got dressed and headed downstairs to find her. When I got to the living room, both the beta of Bloodlake and Blue Moon were sitting on the couch watching some action movie I didn't recognize.

"Good morning, sleeping beauty," Alex said, looking towards me with a smirk. Leon, as always, was quiet.

"This isn't funny, Alex." I hissed as I grabbed the remote and turned off the television, making both of them groan. "The blood Luna is going to be mad at me."

"Chill out, Nyx." Alex rolled his eyes. "I'm training you today."

I frowned. "Where's Arriio? And my mate," I thought silently.

"She and the alpha went hunting," Leon answered. My frown deepened as I tried to mask my jealousy.

"Don't look so disappointed," Alex teased me. "I know I'm not Aizio, but it's not like I'm incapable of training you." I sighed partially in relief. I doubted that Alex would be as aggressive as Aizio, despite his intimidating physique.

"Would you like to eat something before training, Onixa?" Leon asked respectfully, already rising to go to the kitchen.

I gazed. "No thanks. I don't feel like vomiting on the training mat," so I didn't vomit, but I no doubt left gallons of sweat on the floor even now as I lay on my back, groaning.

"Get up, Onixa." Alex ordered. "I barely even touched you."

I rolled my eyes as I pushed myself off the ground, wiping sweat off my brow. "Say that to my ribs that I'm pretty sure you knocked out of place."

"Would you like me to call the pack doctor?" Leon questioned seriously as he watched from the side. He had been mostly quiet throughout training, just throwing in a couple of helpful tips every now and again.

"No, I'm fine," I sighed. And I really was. Alex was more careful than Aizio, although that's not really saying much. He was mindful not to pull too powerful a hit, even though all of them landed on me with ease.

"You ready to get your ass handed to you again?" Alex taunted me, a smile playing on his mouth.

"How much longer do we have to do this?" I complained. We had been training for almost 2 hours.

Alex shrugged. "We're building up your stamina. As soon as you can train for 2 hours without collapsing from exhaustion, I'll feel better about releasing you into the challenge."

I snorted. "Speaking of challenge, when are you going to start training me to fight in wolf form? It's not like we'll be fighting as humans in the challenge."

"Your human side is weaker than your wolf side," Alex explained as he handed me a towel to remove the sweat. The jerk wasn't even slightly out of breath. "We need to strengthen your human side before anything else."

We sparred for about 20 more minutes before Alex ended the training. I must admit, he was excellent at teaching how to fight. Patient, calm, and controlled.

"Thank you for training me today, Alex," I said as we walked back to the pack house. "I really appreciate everything you andio are doing." To my surprise, Alex's fists clenched and his jaw tightened as he nodded.

"Is something wrong?" I asked, my brows furrowed.

Alex ground his teeth. "I just wish your mate," he said the last word bitterly, "was as appreciative as you." Uh, he must have witnessed the andio's fight. I winced. "I'm sorry. I swear I didn't tell him anything and I really did try."

Alex cut me off. "I know, Onixa. Seeing Aizio attacked just it," he struggled to find the words, but Leon jumped in. "Wolves, especially ranked wolves, are extremely protective over their lunas. In many ways, more protective than they are over their alphas. The same way wolves are protective of their mates," Leon quietly explained. Alex nodded appreciatively towards Leyon for verbalizing what he couldn't.

"The Luna has the same pull to our wolves as the moon. And our wolves live and die by the moon," Alex said the last part with intensity as his eyes glowed. I nodded, but to be honest, I didn't really understand the draw of the Luna because I hadn't been in a pack in over a decade. I wondered if Blue Moon wolves would speak about me with the same reverence as Alex does about Arriio.

"The way you care for her is really admirable," I told Alex, and he gave me a small smile. As we approached the pack house, I couldn't help the nagging feeling that the moon goddess had made a mistake by thinking I could be a Luna.

Leon, Alex, and I had been eating lunch when Theren and Orio finally returned. They walked into the kitchen, and I was surprised to hear the blood Luna genuinely laughing. I hadn't considered she was capable of doing something so normal. I immediately noticed the blood that was splattered on Theren's clothing. I assumed there was blood on Ario's clothes, but I couldn't be sure because she was dressed in black as per usual.

"Looks like you two had fun," Alex said, also noting the blood spatter. "Kill anything good?"

The shrugged apathetically. "A couple rogues here and there. Nothing too terribly interesting." My heart fell to my toes. He was out killing rogues. Likely rogues that hadn't done anything wrong either. This may make me naive, but I didn't see why he and Arriio had to go out of their way to kill people who weren't bothering them. If I weren't mated to an alpha, that could have easily been me being slaughtered. The glanced at me as if he heard my thoughts, but didn't say anything. I didn't understand how he could be such a heartless killer. I expected this forio, but I thought the was different. Gray's words about alphas rang through my mind with renewed clarity.

I excused myself to go shower, leaving most of my lunch untouched. It was hard to have an appetite after picturing him ruthlessly fighting someone. When I got out of the shower and put on a white flowery sundress, the was lying on the bed, also freshly showered and wearing clean clothing.

"You're upset that I killed rogues," Theren stated, still staring at the ceiling. "There was no point in denying it."

"Yes," I said stiffly. I didn't want to argue, but I also wasn't going to abandon my morals.

"It's the way it has to be, Onixa." There said, rising from the bed and cupping my face with his hand. I removed it, not too gently. "You don't have to seek out people to kill. That sounds like mental illness to me," I hissed. His eyes widened, probably in shock from my harsh tone. "Ona, you have to understand how many pack members rogues have killed in the past. Me killing them before they have the chance to kill my family is a preventative action and one I will not apologize for."

I narrowed my eyes. "No, I guess it would be too much to expect an alpha not to be a bloodthirsty killer." The eyebrows raised. "You haven't been in a pack. You don't understand how far an alpha will go to protect his pack. Everything I do is to keep them and you safe. There is nothing I wouldn't do to protect my mate." My heart involuntarily clenched at his words. He spoke with such intensity that it made my cheeks burn.

"I just I don't like people being killed," there inside as he pulled me into a hug. "I know. And I love your compassion, little one, but this is something you will just have to adapt to. You two will have blood on your hands after the challenge." I cringed thinking of the way Brenda looked after Arriio's confrontation with her. I couldn't imagine doing that to someone, no matter how much of a jerk they are to me.

"How was training today?" He changed the subject and spoke in a casual tone.

I sighed and decided to let this argument end for now. "It was good. Alex is a really good instructor."

"Glad to hear it, little one." Therein ruffled my hair and I searched his face to see if he was upset about me being trained. There were a few new bruises I was sure he could see.

"You're not mad," I questioned hesitantly. The frowned. "No, Arriio is right. You need to win the challenge by whatever means necessary. I regret my outburst last night, but I'm thankful that it has allowed me to see the error in my ways." I smiled. "One day, I might be able to kick your butt, alpha," I teased him. He chuckled lowly as he said. "Nothing would make me happier than that, little one." The bent down to kiss me, but before his lips could touch mine, I heard a loud knock on the door. I frowned. "Who is that?" I questioned. Any of the blue moon wolves would walk into the pack house. They didn't need to knock. Theen grinned. "Some visitors. I think you'll like one of them a great deal." I cocked my head to the side, but the just grabbed my hand and led me downstairs where I could see Leon, Alex, and Orio talking to two people. As we got closer, I recognized one of them as Lucian, the gamma of Blood Lake. But I had never seen the female who stood next to him. The green-eyed red-haired girl grinned so big when she saw me that I could nearly see her guns. Theren put his hand on the small of my back as he introduced me to the attractive female. "Ona, this is Gwendalyn, a Reizio friend. She'll be staying here for the rest of the week."

Wendalyn's grin didn't falter as she shook my hand. Her green eyes were a glow with both curiosity and excitement. "Arriio best friend," she corrected, humor lacing her tone. "It's nice to finally meet you, Onixa."

Chapter 18. I smiled as I shook her hand. "The wasn't exaggerating. You're gorgeous." The fiery red head grinned. And something about her seemed extremely genuine, like she was actually a nice person, not someone who is just pretending to be nice because I'm an alpha's mate. It was refreshing. I couldn't help the blush that spread across my face.

"Stop hitting on the mate, Gwendalin." I was surprised to hear Leon scoff at her. Leon never backtalked to anybody. Scratch that. He hardly talks to anyone, period. He rolls his eyes in annoyance, much less.

"Sorry, Beta." Gwendalin said without missing a beat. "Is someone a little upset no one is flirting with you?" I pressed my lips together, trying not to laugh aloud.

"Jesus, Gwen," Alex sighed in exasperation, as if he were used to having to rain in his friend. "You're a guest. Please mind your manners."

Gwyn rolled her eyes at the buff male and snorted. "Oh, but Arriio can break Son's jaw in the living room," she challenged him. I mean, a valid point in my opinion, although I wasn't sure how she knew about that, unless Arriio had been talking to her. However, Arriio didn't seem like one who cared to gossip that much. I was shocked when Leon taunted Gwendalin by challenging her to break his. The smirk on his face said that he was well aware that it would be a failed endeavor.

"Goddess, what is wrong with all of these wolves always trying to fight each other?" Theren was undisturbed as he apathetically said, "If you guys feel the need to fight, please do it outside. I just had the house remodeled."

Gwen's eyes lit up. "I could use a little bit of training. The car ride was so long, my legs were beginning to atrophy," she complained. The gamma of Blood Lake rolled his eyes and quietly pointed out that she could have taken a turn driving. My mouth curled into a smile. He didn't really ever say that much when he was here with Kynanne, with the exception of a couple of cutting retorts that always made me laugh. I looked him over, noticing that his beard was fuller than it was the last time I had seen him, even though only a few days had gone by since Kynan and his men left. If my eyes didn't deceive me, he even looked more buff than the last time I had seen him, which was saying something. The guy looked like he popped steroids with his cocoa puffs every morning.

Gwen suggested going to the training center, and I internally cringed. Not only had Alex completely exhausted my body during training this morning, but I was wearing a sundress that was certainly not very practical for training. Even Gwen wasn't wearing typical training gear. She wore tight black jeans, a low cut lacy red tank top, and black stilettos. She looked so hardcore yet girly at the same time. I couldn't help but feel inadequate in her company. I wondered if she had a mate. Lucian didn't seem to like her very much, so I would assume they were not mates.

"You're welcome to go. I would join, but I have paperwork to deal with," Theren said, and I wondered what sorts of responsibilities he had as an alpha. He always seemed to be working, and I never really knew what he was up to.

"What do you say, Ona?" Gwen asked, her green eyes gleaming.

"Um," I hesitated. Training with four Bloodlake Pack members was somewhat intimidating.

"Sensing my trepidation," Alex coaxed. "You wouldn't have to actually train or anything. You could just watch and jump in if you wanted to. You already met your training requirement for the day. I'm sure Arriio wouldn't mind if you just observed." Arriio didn't say anything as she flicked a piece of lint off her cloak sleeve. She either wasn't listening or was mind linking someone else. It was always hard to tell with the mysterious Luna.

"Come on, Gwen begged. It'll be fun. I'm dying to get to know the future Luna of Blue Moon." Okay, I acquiesced only because I knew she wouldn't accept no for an answer. Her brilliant smile at my answer soothed whatever doubts I had about attending. She squealed and Leon winced.

"Are you sure you're part wolf and not part B banshee?" He grumbled. Gwyn narrowed her eyes and pulled out a knife that must have been tucked into the waist of her pants. "If you ruin my mood, then I won't hesitate to ruin your face," she warned. But the smirk on her face told me that she wasn't actually serious about threatening the beta, unlike Arriio stoic threats.

Theren just sighed in mild annoyance. "Gwendalyn. What part about not spilling blood on my new carpet was unclear?"

By the time we got to the training center, my stomach was hurting from laughing so hard. Gwen was incredibly sharp tonged and quickwitted, which made for perfect jokes that landed every time. Despite how happy a person she seemed to be, I couldn't help but feel sorry for her about her deceased mate. She seemed to be highly unbothered by the whole situation, even making a couple of jokes about how she's bagged two betas, a highly impressive feat, she joked cockily. I couldn't deny my surprise when she told me about her and Leon's hookup. He never really struck me as the hookup type, especially with someone so outgoing and eccentric.

Gwen opened the doors to the training center like she owned the place, and we walked in, her heels clicking along the lenolium floors. She immediately went over to the corner of the room that had punching bags, targets, and human-like target dummies. I had never really paid much attention to that section since all of my training so far had just been hand-to-hand combat. The boys went to work on the punching bags and seemed comfortable enough with each other, cracking jokes left and right. I sat down on the floor and watched as Arriio and Gwen took turns throwing knives that Arriio manifested into the target dummies. It didn't take long before two of them had knives deeply embedded in every inch of them. I watched in fascination as the two schwolves stood before me. With Arriio, her motions were clean, precise, and quick. She didn't hesitate before throwing and never failed to hit wherever she was aiming. Gwen, however, was much more chaotic. Her movements were harsh, jerky, and erratic. She was almost as good at aiming as Arriio, even though some of her throws were slightly off. And when they were, Gwyn never failed to curse out the knife in a flurry of swear words that made Arriio laugh and Leon's skull. Even the boys stopped their brutality against the punching bags to watch the two deadly females. I couldn't help the smile that crossed my face as I noticed that Leon's eyes never left Gwen.

When the two targets had not a single inch left of space to be penetrated with a knife, Gwen turned towards me. "Come help us piss off Theren by running all of his dummies."

"M," I think between the two of you, you guys have that covered. I laughed as I deflected her offer.

Gwen pouted. "Come on, Nyx. It'll be fun. Quality bonding time." I hesitated and Arriio mind linked me. "If you come learn how to throw knives, then I'll excuse you from training tomorrow." She bartered. No getting my butt kicked and getting to sleep in. "Count me in." I laughed as I got up from the floor and smoothed my dress.

"Knife?" Gwen offered and held out a knife, which I accepted. "Whiskey." She pulled a flask out of her back pocket. My eyes widened. "No, thank you." She shrugged. "Suit yourself. It makes your aim better." She took a large swig of the alcohol without flinching and passed it to Arriio, who also drank from it.

"Alcoholics," Alex muttered. "Hand it over," he commanded, and Gwen's eyes twinkled mischievously as he also drank the alcohol. Leyon rolled his eyes, but couldn't quite suppress his smile. Even Lucian, who always seemed generally unamused, chuckled at their antics. Alex passed the flask back to Gwen, who chugged the remainder of its contents and hap-hazardly threw the empty container at Leyon, who caught it and scowled.

"Okay, so stand here," Gwen ordered and grabbed my arm until I was standing in the exact location she wanted. "Left foot in front. Grip the blade like so." She demonstrated with her own knife. "Okay, good. Now, put the blade slightly over your shoulder. And when you throw it, make sure to flick your wrist slightly or the blade won't embed in the dummy. For clarification, I mean the target dummy, not the beta dummy on your left." I giggled, and even Arriio snorted at Gwen's comment about Leyon. Gwen and Leyon clearly still had feelings for each other. The tension was thick enough to, well, cut through it with a knife.

"Anytime you want to put down your little knives and spar, I'll be ready, pup. We'll see if you're so sharp tongue then," Leon smirked, letting his canines drop slightly. Gwyn gave an identical smirk, her eyes darkening. "Stop hitting on me, dog. I'm trying to train your future, Luna. I need to focus. And you drank 10 ounces of alcohol, too."

"What? Help your focus?" Leon snorted, his canines descending even further. Gwen was about to shoot back with an equally snarky comment. I'm sure when I decided to disrupt their squabbbling before a full-on brawl happened, not even hours after Gwendalyn arrived, I threw the knife hard into the target dummy, making sure to do as Gwen instructed. To my surprise, the knife actually hit the dummy right in the shoulder. It wasn't the heart, but it at least landed. Gwen examined the dummy and grinned. "Not bad, little wolf. I'm a pretty good teacher, if I do say so myself."

"Don't release the knife so soon. Please wait until it's a little bit lower so you can hit the torso," Azizio offered no words of praise, only instructions. I nodded and took another knife that she offered me. I tried again, and this time the knife hit the dummy slightly lower, but still to the side. Arriio once more corrected my form, and I did as she said for the next throw, which was more centered, but the knife had barely gone into the dummy.

"Please throw harder, Onixa. Remember, the goal is to disfigure the dummies so badly the bans us from his training center," Gwen encouraged with a wink. After a couple more throws, I finally started getting decent at getting somewhat close to the mark.

"Good job, Nyx. We may make a professional out of you yet," Gwen laughed, and I smiled, but it didn't quite reach my ears. The rest of the night was pretty ordinary. We had dinner, which mostly consisted of Gwen saying something outlandish, Leon chastising her, and then Alex trying to diffuse the situation. I was utterly exhausted by the time Theren and I got into bed, my muscles aching all over. Theren offered to give me a massage, which I gratefully accepted. "Thank the goddess that Arriio gave me tomorrow off because I wasn't sure I would be able to move any limbs tomorrow."

"I wish you were there," I mumbled as I told Theren about how good I had gotten at knife throwing.

Theren sighed. "I know. I'm sorry, little one. I know that we haven't spent much time together lately. Things are just a little crazy right now."

"Crazy how?" I asked, groaning as he massaged deeply into my upper back.

Theren hesitated. "Just busy. There are territory issues with Red Crescent that I'm trying to help Kynan figure out. Not to mention, I'm quite preoccupied with trying to track Wilton, who seems to just barely slip through my fingers anytime I get close." I sighed as I flipped over onto my back and looked up at him. "I get that. I really do. I know it has to be hard running a pack, but" his head tilted to the side and he cupped my face gently. "What's bothering you, little one?" I looked to the side, too shy to meet his concerned eyes. "It's just I don't know. It doesn't seem like we've spent much time together. It's just we're mates and I feel like I don't even really know that much about you." I couldn't help the yawn that escaped me. And the laughed gently as he turned out the light. "Don't worry, little mate. Once some of the chaos dies down," his voice trailed

off. And I knew by chaos that he meant when the challenge was over. Things are just messy right now. It'll get better. Don't worry about it. He kissed my forehead, wrapping me tight in his large arms, and most of my worries melted away as I gratefully accepted the peace that came with slumber.

Chapter 19.

I woke up to my bed shaking as if someone was jumping on it. "Wake up. Wake up. Wake up." A female voice cheerfully ordered, and I opened one eye to see Gwen jumping on the bed next to where I was sleeping. "Jeez, Gwen, it's my day off. Let me sleep in," I begged, putting the pillow over my head to block out the light from the windows that she opened.

"Uggh. It's 10:00 a.m. If you round that, it's basically noon." Gwen groaned, flopping on the bed. "I'm bored. Arriio is who knows where. Alex is training Blle, and I'm all alone in this huge house."

"Go annoy Leon," I grumbled, not motivated enough to face her.

Gwen gasped. "Onixa, you are such a grouch in the morning."

I made a non-committal noise, already ready to go back to bed.

"Would you get out of bed if I told you that the is letting us go into the human town and go shopping?"

I threw the pillow to the side and sat upright. "Really? Shopping? I love shopping." I squealed in excitement. "I haven't been to the human city in forever."

Gwen made an equally elated noise and said, "Let's get ready. Arisio will come with us once she gets back."

I scoffed. "Areio shopping? Has she even ever been around humans before?"

Gwen laughed. "Of course she has. I think she avoids them as much as possible, but we've gone into the city a few times with Alpha Kynan. Now that I mention it, I'm not sure Kynan would be too pleased, so make sure lover boy doesn't mention it to him."

I got out of bed and Gwen followed me to my closet. Well, Theren's closet, which he had filled with clothes bought for me. Gwen made herself at home, rummaging through the drawers and hangers. "Ugh, I wish you lived in Blood Lake with me," she said, holding up a light pink dress. "I can't really share clothes with Arriio, you know, but with her whole goth brooding wardrobe, that is seriously depressing."

I laughed. "You can borrow whatever you want." Theren actually got everything for me when I arrived. He didn't give me the chance to pack up all of my old clothes before leaving.

Gwen whistled lowly as she pulled a long tight red gown out of the closet. "Theren has good taste."

I shrugged. "Yeah, he does," I said, choosing my own outfit, a green and white plaid skirt paired with a green cropped button-up sweater.

After getting dressed, I went into the bathroom to do my hair and makeup with Gwen following me in there and sitting up on the counter. While I did my light makeup, Gwen complained about Leyon, how much he got on her nerves, how much she wants to punch him to see the look on his face. I pointed out that her intense feelings of annoyance are just symptoms of a crush.

Gwen scoffed. "I do not have a crush on that insufferable little."

I raised my eyebrow at her as I paused from putting on my mascara. "You had enough of a crush on him to dash."

Gwen interrupted, rolling her eyes. "Yeah, yeah, I know how it looks."

I shrugged, going back to focusing on my makeup. "He likes you. I haven't seen him with, well, any emotions before you came."

Gwen scoffed, but I could see the small smile that crossed her face before she extinguished it.

Gwen and I ate brunch with Alex after getting ready, and the conversation consisted of Gwen arguing with Alex on whether he could or couldn't come shopping with us. "You're even more crazy than I thought if you think I'm not coming to guard you in a foreign territory," Alex argued through bites of waffle.

"You're the crazy one if you think I'm going to let you ruin girl bonding time with your negative energy," Gwen retorted, her own mouth full of chocolate chip pancake.

"Negative energy? What the hell are you even talking about, woman?" Alex demanded, completely befuddled.

Gwen was about to respond when the front door slammed open. A few moments later, Arizio walked into the kitchen alone. "Isn't there with you?" Alex asked her as she rummaged through the fridge.

Arriio mind linked all of us to include us in the conversation. "I was. He just went upstairs to change and shower, I think."

"Did he tell you about our shopping date?" Gwen asked excitedly, her enthusiasm palpable.

Arisio scowled as she took out raw eggs, kale, and a few fruits from the fridge. "I think I'm sick. Sorry. Maybe we can go next week."

Gwen rolled her eyes. "One, you never get sick. Two, you know damn well I'm leaving in two days. Three, well, I don't have a third thing to say, but you know how much I love shopping, so if you take this away from me, then I won't give you the present I brought for you."

Arriio's eyebrows furrowed as she threw the food into a blender. "What present?"

"Well, I had a feeling you would try to ruin mine and Onyx's fun. So, until you agree to go, I'm holding your mask hostage," Gwen stated gleefully as if she wasn't blackmailing the Luna.

"You brought my mask?" Arriio smiled as she blended her drink.

"Yes, and I can't believe you forgot it," Gwen smirked. "It's mine until you go with us."

Arriio just scowled, but I could tell she was relenting.

"And I'm coming, too," Alex interjected, his voice serious.

"Arrest Gwen," she wheezed. "Tell him he's going to ruin girl time if he comes."

Arriio sighed, staring back and forth between the two wolves. Theren suddenly walked into the kitchen and declared, "Beta, let the girls have their alone time. They'll be fine."

Alex's face was bewildered. "Alpha, you've got to be kidding. This is how every Loon abduction story starts."

Theren snorted, "You watch too many movies. I am more than positive that Arriio is capable of defending you both and they aren't even at risk. They're going into a human town. It is unlikely they will run into any werewolves."

Alex's mouth tightened into a straight line and he stalked out of the kitchen without another word.

"Told you," Gwen said, shoveling another bite of food into her mouth. "Negative energy."

Arisio shrugged and drank her disgusting smoothie before telling us that she was going to change into civilian clothing, which made Gwen cackle. Gwen followed after her, bugging her to let her do her hair and makeup. Theren took a seat on the stool next to me.

"You look lovely, little one. Green looks exquisite on you."

A blush spread across my cheeks, and he took a piece of bacon off my plate. "I can't believe you're letting us go into the human town without a guard," I say, surprised. Gray had been so convinced that alphas were overbearing and possessive.

Theren shrugged, gulping orange juice from my cup. "If that makes you nervous, you're more than welcome to take Leon or Alex."

I shook my head quickly. "No, it's fine. I... I'm just surprised as all."

Theren searched my face, trying to decipher my emotion. "Arriio is more than capable of protecting you. Wendalin 2 is far more lethal than you may realize. She's just not as open about it as Arriio."

I nodded pensively as Theren continued speaking. "Also, it's not like you're walking through the woods alone at night. You'll be going to a mall filled with humans. Nobody would be bold enough to attack you in front of all of the humans."

"Makes sense. Alex had just made me paranoid for no reason."

"Speaking of shopping," Theren continued, "I realize I've been a terrible mate in not making sure that you've had adequate accommodations and necessary products while being here."

I was about to protest that there's nothing else I needed that he hadn't already given when I was distracted by him pulling something out of his back pocket, a wallet. "Here, take this," he said, handing me a heavy black card he pulled from the leather wallet. "Before you ask, no, there's no limit," he winked wickedly.

"I can't spend your money," I say in surprise. "I have a card from Gray."

Theren interrupts with an abrupt snarl. "That rogue is not your mate. I am. It's my duty. No, my pleasure, my privilege, to provide for my mate."

I nodded in shock, closing my hand around the heavy credit card. "Thank you," I say, and kiss his cheek in appreciation.

"No thank you," he argues and gently grabs my chin and pulls me in for a deep kiss.

"Gross. People eat here, you know." Gwen's voice interrupts.

Chapter 20.

After a brief argument over who is going to drive one of the many expensive sports cars, Arriio climbed into the driver's seat, smiling victoriously. Gwen was grumbling as she got into the passenger seat. "Fine, but I'm driving for the ride back." I climbed into the back seat, admiring the red leather seats that contrasted beautifully with the sleek black exterior.

"I may have to convince Cayenne to get me one of these," Arizio muttered in appreciation when the car started without the engine making any sound besides a soft murmur.

"Tell him to get me one, too. While he's at it," Gwen chipped in, laughing as she ran her hand over the leather.

"Ona, you know the would get you whatever car you want, right? You should totally take advantage of that."

"I... um... I scratched my head embarrassed. I uh don't know how to drive. You know what with being rogue and all?"

"Wait, but you've been to human towns before. How'd you get there?" Gwen inquired, turning around in her seat to look at me as Arriio drove out of the territory, listening to the online GPS's directions.

"My friend Gray always drove us," I answered.

"Oh, your friend, huh?" Gwen asked as she wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.

"God, Gwen, not everyone thinks about mating 24/7," Arriio rolled her eyes.

"Oh, come on, Onixa. You're telling me you've never had some spontaneous fun with this gray guy?" Gwen insisted.

My cheeks burned. "No, Gwendalin. Gosh, it was never like that."

Her eyebrow raised as her mouth quirked to the side. "What? Is he some kind of gremlin?" she asked.

I laughed. "No, he's pretty attractive. Very muscular. Seems like your type, actually." I subtly alluded to her attraction to Leon.

She snorts. "Well, if he ever decides to rejoin civilization, you give him my number. Not everyone is opposed to spontaneous adventures."

"For goodness sake, Gwen," Arisio chastises her, but I can see her smile.

"I'm just saying," Gwen defends herself and puts her hands up.

"Were you born a rogue?" she asks a minute later.

"No," I surprised myself by answering. "I was born into a pack. It uh didn't work out."

"Theren says, 'You've been rogue for a long time.'" Arisio points out. "'How old were you when you left your pack?'"

"'I could feel this turning into an interrogation, so I decided to shut it down.'" "'Young?'"

"'Hey, how much longer until we get there?'"

Neither Gwen nor Arriio brought up the rogue thing for the rest of the ride, and I could feel the knot in my stomach loosen by the time we pulled into the parking lot.

"Okay, Arriio, quick reminder. No knives, no breaking a guy's hand for talking to you, and absolutely no showing your half-cut tongue to anyone to freak them out when they try talking to you," Gwen instructs as Arriio rolls her eyes. "Do not roll your eyes at me, ma'am. You have done all of those things before. Ona, you seem like a normal human being, unlike the Grinch over here, so I'm assuming I don't need to tell you how to act in public." Gwen asked, and Arriio flipped her off.

I would say that in her civilian clothes, which consisted of leggings, an oversized black hoodie, and running shoes, she looked much less intimidating. If it weren't for the large scar that ran down her eyebrow to the bottom of her cheek, and her one white eyeball, she would actually fit in fine in human society. She even wore her long whitish hair down, not pulled back or braided.

"I can handle myself. Thank you, Gwendalin."

I laughed. "However, I do have one mandatory job for you," Gwen stated, and I raised an eyebrow. "You have to help me pick out clothes for Arriio since there's no chance she chooses anything for herself."

Arriio scowled. "Hello, I'm right here, and I don't need more clothes."

Gwen scoffed. "Oh, honey, I've seen your closet, and you're in serious need of a fashion intervention."

Arriio just glared at her as we stepped into the mall. Her nose crinkled. "Humans smell weird," she said after noticing the curious look on my face. "My sense of smell must not be as advanced as hers because I had no idea what she was talking about."

Gwen dragged us inside an upscale clothing store and immediately started tearing through the racks, sometimes pulling off an article of clothing and keeping it, and other times gagging and putting it back. Gwen was entirely in control as she flew through the store, sometimes putting stuff in my arms, sometimes in Arriio's, which was always met with a scowl and string of swear words. I tried picking something out for myself, but Gwen slapped it out of my hands and said, "That is so last season, Onixa. How could you?" with a mortified expression on her face.

After I could barely hold everything she handed me, she told a sales associate to open three of the largest fitting rooms they have. The lady smiled broadly, no doubt with dollar signs in her eyes. Gwen shoved Arriio into one, and Arriio angrily said, "I am the blood Luna. You cannot force me into these ridiculous garments."

"Blah blah blah. Pull rank on someone who cares, Arriio." Gwen rolled her eyes as she closed the door to Arriio's changing room in her face. "Oh, and don't forget to show me everything you try on, hot stuff. Can't wait."

I could hear Arriio punch the wall angrily in the dressing room, which sent Gwen and me into a splitting laughter. I went into the dressing room, looking at the garments Gwen picked out for me, and I must say, she had impeccable taste. The one thing that surprised me was a low cut tight gown with blue stones decorating the bodice. I decided to save that one for last, instead putting on a two-piece set, a blue skirt, and a matching cropped tank top. When I was dressed, I went out into the hallway with the other dressing rooms, and soon after, Gwen and Arriio both stepped out. Gwen was wearing tight black leather pants and a form-fitting red top that laced up in the front. My mouth dropped when I saw Arriio. Gwen had put her in a short black mini dress. "Classic, simple."

"Arriio's face was one of disgust. 'Gwen, under what circumstances would I ever wear this?' Arriio said, repulsed."

"Gwen shrugged. 'You never know.' She grinned wickedly, and before anyone knew what was happening, she pulled out her cell phone and snapped a quick picture. 'I think Cayenne would appreciate it, that's for sure.'"

Arriio snarled. "Gwendalyn Parker, I will tear your throat out if you send that to him."

Gwen tilted her head to the side. "How would you do that when I'm already safe in my dressing room?" She quickly bolted back into the room, locking the door behind her. Arriio swore at her before looking at me.

"You look lovely, Ona," she said, a small smile on her face and my mouth went dry. "I certainly never expected a compliment from her." She turned around, ready to go back into her dressing room, and I mind linked her, "Luna, for what it's worth. I think you look beautiful in the dress."

"I appreciate the compliment, Onixa, but let's be honest, my scars make it almost impossible for me to look anything but monstrous in clothes like these," she quietly responded from behind her dressing room door.

Back in my own room, I pensively thought as I got into the next outfit. "I've never once thought you look monstrous. The scars are badass and so are you." I admit to her.

Arriio didn't respond, nor did I expect her to. It did, however, surprise me, for I never considered that the blood Luna may have insecurities. Everything about her seemed so confident, so self-assured, I just assumed she knew how amazing she was. We continued trying on outfits, and Arriio gradually looked less uncomfortable with each mini fashion show. Gwen's control freakness made her style immaculate for all of us, and I didn't even want to know how she accurately guessed sizes for all of us.

I got to the last outfit, the gown. I couldn't deny that it was gorgeous. One of the most beautiful articles of clothing I've ever seen. The price tag, however, knocked the wind out of me. I went out into the hallway where Gwen and Arriio were already waiting in dresses of their own. Gwen wore a simple, sexy dark green gown and Arriio a deep red, the color of blood.

"Wow, Onixa. I don't suppose Theron is willing to share you with me," Gwen's eyes bulged out of her head.

I laughed. "No, I don't think he'd go for that."

"Why'd you choose a gown for me anyways? This is way too fancy to actually wear to anything."

"Your mating ceremony," Arriio answered, looking at my gown. "The Lunis of Blue Moon wear blue gowns when their mating bond is complete. It's tradition."

"How do you know that?" I asked Arriio in surprise.

"Kynan told me about some of the different packs' mating traditions when we were preparing for our own," Arisio said, and her eyes got a far away look in them.

"Well," Gwen interjected, "Theren told me to make sure you got an appropriate gown for it before we left."

I smiled softly, trying not to think about the odds that I would never get to wear the dress. We paid for the clothing and visited a few other stores, repeating the process.

"Gwen," I wheezed. "This is far more exhausting than any training. Please tell me we're all done here."

"One more stop," Gwyn pleaded before dragging us into a lingerie store.

"You've got to be joking," I groaned, and Arriio made a noise in agreement.

"Oh, come on, you guys. You both have mates. This is like the most fun part of having a mate."

Arriio scoffed. "Oh, and am I to be under the assumption that you won't be purchasing anything for your little beta boyfriend?"

Gwen tilted her head to the side. "Don't be ridiculous, Sizio. There's no way he'd fit into any of the panties or bras here."

I giggled, but Arriio just rolled her eyes. "Gwen, since you seem to think you know best what Onixa and I should wear, why don't you pick out our items for us, and we can sit down and watch the bags," Arriio suggested, and I nodded way too excitedly.

Gwen sighed. "Fine. It's a blessing and a curse to be the least fashion challenged out of you lot."

Arriio and I sat down on a nearby couch while Gwen sifted through all of the items, having two salespersons following her and collecting things as she went along. Arriio groaned when Gwen held up a lingerie set that didn't even look like there was enough fabric to be put on a body. Gwen just smirked and threw it into what I assumed was the Arriio pile based on her reaction. Finally, we paid and left the store and began walking out to the parking lot.

"Well, hello ladies." A male voice spoke from behind us. Immediately, the three of us turned around.

"It's just a human," Arriio spoke, unbothered, and she and Gwen turned back around.

"You interested, cutie?" The man, no older than 25, said. He wasn't the ugliest guy I had ever seen, but he was definitely not comparable to my mate.

"Definitely not," I muttered, turning back around, and Gwen laughed. The guy continued to walk behind us and Gwen angrily turned back around. "Piss off, ugly. We're tens. You're clear, too. Maybe three at best. Do the math yourself. Yeah." She gave a patronizing smile.

The guy swore and lunged at Gwen. My adrenaline pumping. I jumped in front of her and swung at the man, punching him right along his cheekbone. I could hear some of his teeth shattering in his mouth. "Oops. I hadn't realized humans were quite so delicate." The guy stared up at me, crumpled on the ground in confusion. "What the hell?" he asked, teeth falling out of his mouth along with a stream of blood. "No means no. Dish a bag," I hissed and bent down to smack his jaw one more time to make sure he got the message.

"I went back to join Gwen and Arriio, both of whom were grinning from ear to ear at me. We were almost to the car and kept walking."

"What did I tell you?" Gwen said as she climbed into the front seat of the car. "Negative energy everywhere."

Chapter 21.

Bane's POV.

"Don't worry, we're almost back. Your mate is asleep in the back seat. I'm not sure I can stop Gwen from smacking her awake. The lack of attention is killing her," Arriio mind linked me in response to my inquiry about their location.

"Tell Walin that I will tell Leon that she's been talking about him non-stop the whole time she's been here," I threaten, only half-kidding. I pace anxiously in the garage, waiting for them to return. Despite my indifferent attitude about their little trip, I couldn't deny that releasing Onixa into the wild made me more than apprehensive. Which is why I had pack members scattered through the mall watching the girls just in case anything went wrong. I'm assuming since I didn't get an angry mind link from, she had no idea that my pack members were keeping tabs on them.

After what seems like hours, they finally pull into the garage, and I can't help the slight exhale that escapes me as my wolf relaxes for the first time in hours. I can see my mate sleeping in the back seat as Gwen and Arriio get out of the car, popping the trunk to reveal a copious amount of bags.

"If you tell Leon I was talking about him, I will end you," Gwen threatened, whispering so she didn't wake up my sleeping nicks.

"Duly noted," I mock salute and she flips me off. "So polite, that young lady." I quietly unbuckle Onyx's seat belt and scoop her into my arms gently, careful not to wake her. When I bring her close to my chest, her small fists clench around my shirt, and she breathes in deeply, but her slow heartbeat tells me she's still asleep. I head into the house after Arriio and Gwen. And before I go upstairs, Gwen tells me with a wicked grin, "I charged everything to your card. Hope that's not a problem."

"I'll see you in court," I sarcastically mutter, too preoccupied with getting my mate into her bed to deal with Gwen's antics. She knows it's nearly impossible to make me lose my cool, but if she didn't spend every minute trying. I didn't mind, to be honest. I found her frustration quite amusing.

When we reach our room, I hold her to my chest with one arm and use the other one to pull down the covers to tuck her in properly. When I pull the covers over her, I see her hand reaching out as she's still fully asleep. I grin like a damn idiot as I slide in next to her, and she sighs contentedly as she places her head on my chest and her arm haphazardly thrown over my abdomen. I run my hand through her hair as she rests, kissing her head every few minutes softly.

After about an hour, I feel her begin to stir as she awakens. She opens her wide blue eyes and the first thing she does is smile. Suddenly, her smile faltered and she looked around in confusion. "I just had the weirdest dream that I went shopping with the blood Luna and Gwen."

I chuckled. "I'm afraid whatever tortures they subjected you to did in fact happen. You fell asleep in the car, I carried you up here. I didn't want to disturb you."

"Oh," she said, her cheeks painted with the lovely blush I love to see. "And even more love to cause."

"Are you hungry?" I asked, unable to suppress my primal need to provide for her, to care for her. She put her head back on my chest and wrapped her arm around me once more. "Maybe we could just stay like this a little bit longer."

I grinned widely, knowing she couldn't see the idiotic look on my face.

"So, we're walking, right?" Gwen starts the story for what must have been the hundredth or hundredth and one time. "And this human has the nerve to try swinging on me, right? Mind you, Arriio and I had already worked out who would be the one who would get to break his face. So imagine my shock when Onixa, tiny little Onixa, leaps in front of me like Superman, like this." Gwen, drunkenly, may I add, jumped to the side, sloshing some of her drink onto my new rug, which makes me sigh. "She punches him in the face. No hesitation. Not a single given." Gwen laughs as do Arriio, Alex, Lucian, Leon, and Jackson. "And I can literally hear like half his teeth shatter, right? And this crazy still isn't done with him yet."

Ona groans, pressing herself closer into me, my arm wrapped protectively around her, though nothing could protect my mate from the banshee in front of me. "And then she goes, 'No means no, douchebag.' Pow!" Gran made punching sound effects as she fell to the floor and fought the invisible assailant. We all laughed at her antics, except for Onixa, who covered her blushing face with her hands. "Oh my gosh, I'm begging you, Gwen. Stop telling this story," my poor little mate pleaded.

Snorting, Gwen responded, "No way, Buttercup. That was way too legendary." "Pow!" "Haha!" Gwen laughed at herself, still throwing punches at the air, and tears were streaming down her face.

"Control your woman," I tease Leon through our mind link. He rolls his eyes and responds, "No, thank you, Alpha. I will respectfully decline that offer and let you handle it." It seems I made a mistake in assuming that Arriio would be the bodyguard for the trip. I chuckle as I pin Kenix's burning cheek, and she swats my hand away, but not before granting me a sheepish smile.

"Maybe you should be training me, Nicks," Alex says as he howls in laughter. Arriio chokes on her drink, coughing through her laughter. What truly surprised me was Arriio's good mood, although Cayenne did happen to mention her little alcohol problem, and I told him I would be a good influence on her. Unfortunately, my good influence was canceled out by Hurricane Gwen. Nick's face palmed and hit her face in my shirt. "I will never live that down."

"Absolutely not," Leon agreed with a laugh, setting his nearly empty bottle down. I did not doubt that Gwen was responsible for getting him drunk.

"I can't wait until you and the have pups, and we can tell them about how their mother assaulted a human." I can feel Onyx's cheeks burning a hole in my shirt, but I can also feel her smile as I wrap both arms around her tightly. Pictures of tiny pups, a combination of me and my better half, flooded my mind. and it took nearly all of my self-control not to whisk her away upstairs to get started.

Now, when I refocused my attention, I saw Arriio discard an empty bottle to the side and grab another unopened one. Whatever smile she had had a few moments earlier was long gone. "I'm going to bed." "Good night, everyone," she curtly said, turning abruptly around with the bottle clutched so tightly that her knuckles were paper white.

"Boo!" Gwen wheezed, stomping her foot. "It's only midnight. You're such a boor."

Arriio flipped her off, not turning around as she went upstairs. Nobody else seemed bothered by her sudden departure, but it bothered me for some reason. I muttered, realizing our mistake. Leon mentioned pups, having no clue what Luna was struggling with. Although Arriio never mentioned it to me, Cenne had informed me of their inability to conceive, although he didn't tell me any details. In addition to finding Wilton, retrieving Onixa's gift, and ensuring Onixa wins her challenge, I added one more task to my list. Helping the blood Luna and Alpha Procure.

Chapter 22.

My head smacked against the training floor, making my skull vibrate. "Come on, Nyx. Is that the best you can do?" Gwen antagonistically asked, proudly putting her foot on my chest.

I frowned. "I was just warming up."

Laughing, Gwen extended her hand out to me, which I accepted as she pulled me back up. "We've been training for an hour. I'm pretty sure that's enough warm-up time."

"Rematch," I scowled as I grabbed the back of my head and stretched out my neck, ignoring the throbbing in the back of my head.

"I'm almost starting to feel bad," Gwen teased, and I knew she really didn't. We sank into fighting positions, and Gwyn playfully snapped her canines at me, making me roll my eyes. Arisio mind linked me, telling me that her left side was unguarded and to keep a solid defense while attacking her left. I nodded slightly in acknowledgement, and Gwen quickly blocked it using the form that Arriio had taught me. I kicked at Gwen's left, hitting her right in the rib cage.

"Ona! Ouch!" Gwen groaned, clutching her side. "I thought we were friends."

I smiled, knowing that she had done the same to me in our first match. I went for her left again, but Gwen had changed her guarding focus to her left and blocked it. She threw a punch at my face, which I ducked from, as her punches were much slower than the ones I had grown accustomed to receiving from Alex and Arriio. Deciding to adjust, I threw a punch to Gwen's right, and she doubled over in pain. Not wasting a minute, I tackled her, sending both of us crashing to the floor, Gwen underneath me. She struggled to get me off, but I was already on top of her and held her hands down.

"Huh? Got you, you red-headed demon," I laughed in a combination of relief and excitement.

"Get off me, jerk. You broke one of my ribs. You totally owe me a drink after this," Gwen wheezed, the sore loser she is. I laughed as I got off the ground, smiling as Arriio told me, "Good job, and that I was making good progress." I could tell that Arriio was pleased I was able to take down Gwen. Gwen scowled at me as she looked at the dark bruise on her rib cage. I doubted anything was broken. She was just being dramatic.

"Sitting during training, that's at least 20 laps," I heard Sion's voice from behind us and the three of us whipped our heads to look at the alpha. Arisio leapt off her place on the floor, sprinting towards the alpha. I half expected her to attack him, so I was surprised when she jumped into his arms, wrapping her arms and legs around her mate. Kynan caught her effortlessly, chuckling slightly. A deep rumble that I was surprised came out from him as he always seemed so stoic.

"Party's over," Gwen whispered to me, jerking her head towards the alpha. I could hear him talking to her, but couldn't quite make out what was being said. Gwen must have been able to as we got closer because she said, "Kynan, don't you know it's rude to comment on a girl's weight."

Kynan rolled his eyes, but there was an amused twinkle in his eye. "Don't start with me, Gwendalin." He turned to me and formally said, "Ona, it's nice to see you again."

I smiled and nodded respectfully, "Alpha Kynan."

He smiled back and wrapped his arms around his much smaller mate. "Let's go get some food in you, pup." I was surprised that Arriio didn't look mad that he called her a pup, and she didn't look like she wanted to rip his head off. All of the times I heard the word being said in between Blue Moon members, it always sounded like an insult. But if there was one thing in the world I didn't understand, it was the blood alpha and Luna.

The hand was resting on my thigh throughout lunch, and it sent little bolts of electricity through my body. No doubt from the mate bond. It was all I could focus on as Gwen complained about the training even as she and Kynan began arguing. I did however notice that Arriio was careful to push the food around her plate, making it look like she had eaten more than she really had. Alpha Kynan was right to have commented about the weight she had lost, and I felt guilty for not seeing it sooner. They excused themselves from the table, and Kynan carried Arriio upstairs, peppering kisses along her face the whole time. Whatever Gradon thought he had known about the blood alpha and Luna was entirely off. Despite the time I had seen them fight each other, Alpha Kynan was nothing but gentle to his mate.

"Onixa?" Theren asked, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Huh?" I asked, not having heard what he said prior.

"I asked if you wanted to go tonight."

At the confused look on my face, he elaborated. "To the human club. Gwen wants to make it an outing with all of us."

"Oh, right," I say, even though I hadn't been listening to the conversation leading up to it. "Of course, that sounds fun."

Gwen squealed and Leon winced. "Yay. This is going to be a blast. Can I do your makeup? Please let me pick out your outfit. Maybe something a little classy. Wait, no. Definitely sexy." Gwen wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.

Theren rolled his eyes. "Later. I need a moment with my mate."

Worry flooded my body, scared that he was mad at me for something. "Are you mad at me?" I blurted out as soon as we arrived at his room.

He raised an eyebrow. "Did you do something to make me mad?"

"No," I defensively answered. "You just said you wanted to talk."

Theren chuckled. "Is it a crime to want a moment alone with my mate?"

"Of course not," I exhaled in relief. "But I do have to ask, what had you so distracted you were able to tune out Gwendalyn's incessant rambling during lunch?"

He cocked his head to the side. I winced, thinking of the blood Luna. "Arriio Alpha Kynan pointed out that she lost weight. Did you notice that she hardly has been touching her food?"

Theren stared at me for a moment and sat on the bed, patting the spot next to him, a gesture indicating that I should sit, which I did. "Arriio has been through a lot as you know." I nodded at Theren's words. "The Wilton incident that people often vaguely reference what she went through. Many people wouldn't have survived. She's traumatized in many ways that I don't think Kynan or even she realizes. She's strong, no doubt, but after what happened to her, anyone would be traumatized. Of course, it doesn't help that she blames herself for not being able to have a pup."

"I interrupt Theren. 'What do you mean she's not able to have a pup?' I ask in confusion. 'The moon goddess basically guarantees that wolves, especially Lunas, can have children with their mates.'"

Theren winced, "Don't tell anyone about this, Onixa. They really don't want anyone to know but the Luna is unable to conceive due to injuries sustained."

I gasp, covering my mouth with my hand. "I had no idea. That must be devastating for them. I feel terrible."

Theren pulled me into his arms. "Oh, little one. I know it's a horrible situation. Unfortunately, it's one between them and them alone. I've recommended healers, but it doesn't look good. I'm still looking into ways to help," but his voice trailed off, and I could hear the helplessness in his voice. "I've also been looking into how to get your gift back, but I've looked through the archives, spoken with the elders, but nobody has ever heard of someone losing their gift." He ran a hand through his disheveled hair in distress.

"Is that why you've been so busy lately?" I ask in sympathy, and he nods, closing his eyes. "I can see the dark circles under his eyes. It's not your job to bear the burden of everyone else," I mumble, and we crawl under the covers. "I'm sorry. I didn't realize. You must feel like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders," I say sympathetically, stroking his hair soothingly. And he relaxes under my touch.

"That's what being an alpha is, Onixa. It's my responsibility to take care of those around me. It's my nature."

"I don't want you to keep all of this to yourself," I tell him, "I'm your mate. Your burdens are just as much mine as they are yours."

Theren kisses my forehead. "It's okay, Ona. I've been the alpha a long time. I'm used to this. All I need from you is for you to feel happy, safe. That's all I need." He repeats. We stay silent for a while and I look at him realizing by his deep breathing, closed eyes, and slightly open mouth that he fell asleep. I smile slightly at how peaceful he looks. But I can't help the guilt I feel over his anxieties. Whatever happens, we will get through it together. Even if I never got my gift back, the thought was enough to shatter my heart into a billion pieces.

Chapter 23.

I wasn't asleep when Gwen knocked on the door loudly. "Come on, Onixa. We have to start getting ready." Theren however immediately bolted upright at the loud sound.

"She'll be out in a minute, Gwendalin," Theren calls out annoyed. "I'm going to kill Gwen one of these days if Kynan doesn't beat me to it," he muttered irately.

"I heard that," Gwen yelled back, but I could hear her walking away for the time being. I got out of bed, but Theren stopped me, grabbing my hand.

"Wait, there's something I want to give you." I tilted my head to the side as he leans over, reaching for something in the bedside table drawer. "Close your eyes," he instructs me and I oblige. "Pull your hair up," and I do. I can feel him putting a necklace around my neck. My neck suddenly feeling heavier. I open my eyes to see a large sparkling blue gemstone adorning my neck.

"Theren," I whisper, picking it up with my hand and admiring it. "This is too much. I can't accept this."

Theren smiled. "It looks lovely on you, Ona. I had it handmade for you after I found you. I've been waiting for the right time to give it to you."

"It's beautiful," I say breathlessly.

"Not nearly as beautiful as the person wearing it," Theren contradicts, placing a kiss along my collarbone, sending shocks through my body. I throw my arms around his neck. "Thank you," I say as I kiss him. He deepens the kiss, pulling me in, pressing me closer to him, and I can feel the outline of his chest.

Another loud knock on the door interrupts us, and Theren groans. "The prospect of killing her looks better every day."

While Gwen wrestles with Arriio's hair, I can't help but admire the necklace Theren gifted me. When Gwen saw it, her mouth dropped. "Maybe I should be going after alphas instead of betas," she remarked, which sent us into a splitting laughter.

"Hey Nyx, be a dear and hand me my purse, would you?" Gwen asks, and I nod, retrieving it for her. She rummaged through it before pulling out a bottle of alcohol, and I rolled my eyes. Alex had been right when he called them alcoholics. Gwen chugged from it before handing it to Arriio, who did the same.

"Drink," Gwen ordered, giving me the bottle. I took it, but cringed. "Come on, Onixa. We're going out. Should at least pregame."

I groan, knowing she won't let me leave the house until my blood is replaced with alcohol. "For the record, I totally realize you're peer pressuring me into this," I say as I unscrew the cap.

Gwen grins mischievously as I bring the bottle to my lips. I drink and start coughing after I swallow the liquid that feels like it is burning a hole in my throat. "That's terrible. Why would anyone voluntarily drink that?" I sputter.

Gwen snorts and says, "You'll find out soon enough, baby. Keep drinking. I'm watching you," she warns. I roll my eyes, but keep drinking anyway. Not appreciating the taste one bit. She was right, though. After a few more swigs, drinking it became much easier, and I liked the warm feeling in my chest.

Arriio leaves us in the bathroom to get dressed, and Gwen adjusts the small gemmed clips she put in my hair earlier. She leans back, admiring her work. "Theren better apologize for saying he wants to kill me after seeing how good you look." I snorted, but she's right. I do look amazing. I wore a short blue dress, silver heels, and Gwen put glittery eye makeup on me expertly. Slightly off balance, I walked into the main section of the bedroom where Arriio was staring at her reflection. In the black mini dress, she looked stunning.

"Wow," I say, unable to find the words. "You look wow." What I really wanted to say was that she looked unbelievably powerful. Even in a dress and heels, she seemed absolutely lethal. The heels made her leg muscles look even more defined, and the dress showed off her toned arms. She really did look like a Luna should.

She thanked me with a smile, and Gwen came in whistling. "Damn, that's my hot Luna." She hyped her up.

Arisio rolled her eyes. "We better get going. They've been waiting downstairs for us forever."

Gwen scoffed. "When we look this good, we're allowed to be as late as we want. Plus, Onixa and I need to finish the bottle." Gwen held up the little bit of alcohol that was left from the second bottle she had procured.

Arriio left, and Gwen and I finished the bottle, giggling the whole time, completely tipsy. When we finished, we left the hallway where Kynan and Arriio were embracing each other. My mate snapped his head up, his bright green eyes meeting mine. The moment was ruined when Gwen said to Kynan and Arriio, "Down boy. Not until after we get back and definitely not in the hallway."

"You look absolutely exquisite, little one," Theren told me as we were snuggled up in the backseat of the car, Leon driving.

"I might consider not killing Gwendalyn," I laugh and say, "She said you might say that."

"Of course she did," Theren rolled his eyes. I giggle, completely tipsy, and Theren seems completely amused as we pull into the parking lot. We head inside the club where loud music is playing and humans are dancing. Not a single care in the world.

"Do you want something to drink, love?" Theren asks, his hand on my lower back. I nod and he guides us to the bar. We sit at the bar top laughing as Leon complains about how much uglier human girls are than she-wolves. "Seriously," he complains. "I could snap them in half without even trying."

"Maybe they're into that," I joke with a giggle, and Leon looks bewildered by my teasing. Alpha Kynan, Arriio, Gwen, and Alex entered the club, and the humans stared at them completely mystified. No doubt, seeing their unnatural beauty and sensing the aura of power that radiated from them. After they all got drinks, Theren guided us to a private section of the club where huge couches were stationed and a waitress stood along the edge, ready to fetch whatever we needed.

"Can we dance?" I begged Theren and he nodded, laughing. We went to the dance floor where we spent the next hour dancing, and I felt completely free. Even Theren had his typical stoic mask down and was grinning from ear to ear, laughing as he spun me into his arms. Gwen, who had been dancing with a human boy, was interrupted when Leon angrily stalked over to her, and I barely heard him over the music when he told the human boy to leave. The human boy nodded and scurried away, and Gwen smirked at Leon as she danced with him, looking pleased by his protective nature. She winked at me when she caught me staring, blushing. I turned to look at Arriio and Kynan, but they were no longer sitting in their position on the couch where they had been, as Theren would say, together. I looked around the club, but they weren't dancing either. Theren had a distant look on his face, and I realized he was mind linking someone. Theren froze, and Leon immediately joined his side, pulling Gwen along with him.

"Gwen, stay here and guard Onixa," Theren ordered. And Alex suddenly joined us. Alex and Leon turned, heading for the door, and I grabbed Theren's hand. "What's going on?" I asked, panic seeping into my body.

"Stay here with Gwen. She'll keep you safe," was all Theren said, and he ran out of the club in front of Leon and Alex. Gwen dragged me into the private section of the bar, and I saw her hitch her dress up slightly, revealing a sheathed knife on her thigh, which she removed and concealed. Her eyes were searching the club, examining everyone, looking for even one person to look slightly out of place. However, nobody approached us, and I asked in fear, "What's happening?"

Gwen didn't look away from the scene as she answered, "Wilton."

Ice coated my veins. Despite not knowing that much about him, if he was capable of hurting the blood Luna, that made him one of the most dangerous people I didn't even know. We continued to wait and I fidgeted in anxiety. Finally, Arriio stalked into the club, shoving through the different throngs of people to get to us. Her face is blank, but she doesn't look distressed.

"Let's go," she says as she reaches us, and Gwen asks quietly, "Did you catch him?"

A smile so grim it makes my heart drop spread across Arriio's face as she said, "We got him." Arisio rushed us into the car and broke every driving rule as she sped us all the way back to Blue Moon. The whole time I had only one thought, one prayer to the moon goddess. I prayed that by catching Wilton,

Arriio would find the peace she deserves.

Chapter 24.

Arriio practically flew out of the car, and she was inside the pack prison before Gwen or I could even get out of the vehicle. Gwen unbuckled her seat belt, and we rushed out of the car to follow Arriio in when Alex and Leyon stopped us.

"Apologies, the alphas have restricted access to the prison during this time." Leon spoke formally.

"Forget that." Gwen snarled, trying to push past him. Leon restrained her, wrapping his arms around her.

"Let go of me." Gwen hissed, still struggling in Lyon's grasp. "That man is the reason I lost my mate. I want to see him face justice."

"I'm under orders from my alpha to keep both of you away from the prison. We're going back to the pack house. Whether I have to drag you there myself or not." Leon's voice was resolute, not leaving any room for arguments.

"You're not going to want to see what's going on in there." Anyway, Alex muttered quietly to me, and as if on cue, I heard a scream from the building, and I was inclined to agree with him. If Wilton was the reason the blood Luna and Alpha could not conceive, I did not doubt that the interrogation would be intense.

"Fine, let me go. I'll behave," Gwen promised and stopped squirming in Lyon's arms. Leon released her, and immediately she spun around, punching him in the jaw. He groaned, grabbing his face, and Gwen was sprinting to the entrance. She almost made it, but Leon tackled her before she could reach the door. He pinned her to the ground, and she struggled to get out from underneath him.

"Stop fighting me," he roared. So much authority in his voice, it almost made me drop to my knees. Gwen whimpered from underneath him, her body relaxing. I was surprised when Leon leaned his head down and kissed her. I was even more surprised when Gwen kissed him back.

"Let's go back," Alex muttered to me, and I nodded, pulling my eyes away from the situation. Alex hopped in the car and drove us back to the pack house in silence.

When we arrived, Jackson and Lucian were pacing in the living room. "Is it true? They really have Wilton." Lucian asked, and Alex nodded. The gamas visibly relaxed, and we all took a seat in the living room.

"If she kills him, she'll become the alpha." Lucian pointed out.

"I know," Alex simply stated, and I gasped.

"What do you mean, become the alpha? The alpha of what?" I asked in confusion.

Alex sighed. "Wilton is technically the alpha of the Red Crescent Pack, where Arisio was originally the gamma until she became the Luna of Blood Lake." My mouth dropped slightly open. It shouldn't have surprised me that the dangerous female had been a gamma, but it did. What he said next surprised me even more. "Wilton is her birth father. She is the heir to the Red Crescent Pack. When she kills Wilton, she will undergo the alpha transition," Alex explained.

I gasped. The person who had been training me had been an alpha by birthright, which undoubtedly explained her raw power and strength. "When she becomes the alpha, how much stronger will she be?" None of them had an answer.

I tossed and turned, unable to sleep that night. By morning, they still hadn't returned. I knew that I was safe with Alex and Jackson guarding my door, as they said they were under strict orders from Theren not to leave me unguarded until he returned. His protectiveness over me warmed my heart, and I longed to have him back with me already.

After I had showered and dressed, I exited the room, almost crashing into the beta and gamma. We headed downstairs, where Gwen and Leyon were eating breakfast. Gwen's hair was a mess.

"Hey girl," Gwen said, her mouth full of food.

"Looks like you had a fun night," I laughed, dodging a piece of fruit that Gwen had thrown at me.

"You look like crap," she said delicately.

"Couldn't sleep." I just shook my head, reaching for the cereal.

"Shouldn't they be back by now?" I asked. It was Leon who finally answered me.

"Uh, the Luna is going through the alpha transformation. It could take a while."

"What does it entail?" I asked out of curiosity, taking a seat next to Gwen. This time it was Lucian who answered me.

"It's not an easy process. Her wolf will be in control for a while, fighting for dominance. It will be painful for her as she struggles with the influx of power."

"You seem to know a lot about it," Gwen points out. He looked away, but the conversation was interrupted when we heard the front door open. We all rushed to see them arrive. Alpha Kynan was carrying Orrizio's limp body, and she was wrapped in a shirt.

"My mate followed close behind," his eyes surrounded by dark circles.

"Is she okay?" we all asked, trying to catch a glimpse of the Luna, but he kept her concealed. He nodded, offering no words as he carried her away up the staircase. Theren pulled me into his arms, surprising me with how tightly he held me.

"I missed you," he whispered into my ear. "You look exhausted." I frowned as I pulled away, examining the bags under his eyes.

"You should get some rest." He nodded, and I squealed as he picked me up and threw me over his shoulder and started heading for the stairs.

"Nice to see you, too, Theren," Gwyn called out from behind us, but he ignored her, continuing his pursuit of his bedroom. He threw me on his bed, and I was surprised to see how dark his eyes were.

"Are you okay, Theren?" I asked in concern. He didn't answer as he stripped down to his boxers and climbed into bed with me, wrapping his arms around me. We stayed like that for a few moments before he finally spoke.

"It was a long night. The alpha transition is difficult. It brought up some bad memories as well." He shrugged off my concern, closing his eyes.

"From your transition?" I asked quietly, and his eyes shot open. He nodded. "I was alone for mine. I was 16 years old and my father hadn't prepared me for it because I wasn't supposed to take over for a few more years. I didn't realize what was happening to me, why I couldn't control my shifting or my wolf. When I finally woke up, I learned that my parents had been slaughtered, and I was now responsible for an entire pack." His voice was soft, and I could see the pain in his eyes.

"I'm so sorry you went through that alone," I whispered, and his arms tightened around me.

"It was a long time ago. I'll be able to sleep knowing that my parents' murderer is dead now." He closed his eyes, and after a few moments of silence, he let out a soft snore. My mind was reeling. I hadn't known that Wilton had also been responsible for his parents' death, since he had only told me that they were murdered, but not by whom. I couldn't believe how much pain Wilton had inflicted on so many people I care about. I suddenly no longer felt guilty about whatever interrogation that Arriio had put him through. I fell asleep after a while, too, comforted by the proximity of my mate.

When I woke up, I saw Theren looking through his drawers, a towel slung low on his hips. I continued to watch him, appreciating how his muscles flexed with any slight movement, unable to believe that the moon goddess had blessed me with such an attractive mate.

"I can feel you staring, little one," Theren said, his back still turned towards me. My face flushed, and I pulled the blanket over my face.

"I don't know what you're talking about. I'm still asleep." Theren laughed, and a moment later pulled the comforter down. He had already dressed himself, and I was relieved that he looked much better than he had a few hours ago. His dark circles were long gone, and his eyes were back to their glowing green.

"We should go downstairs. Kynan and Arriio should be back any minute now," he said, running his hand through my hair.

"Where did they go?" I asked as I got out of bed.

"Arriio now has a lot of power running through her. She needed an outlet for that much strength, her and Kynan left to try and get some of that aggression out," Theren explained as we left his room. "She'll be even more aggressive than usual."

I asked in surprise, slightly terrified for myself. Theren laughed at the look on my face as he squeezed my hand. "Don't worry, little one. She probably won't be the one actually sparring with you for a while until she learns how to control her strength. It would be dangerous for her to fight a wolf with the way she is now, unless that wolf is within her relative strength level." I nodded, not taking offense at his words. Ariseio already had the capacity to defeat me before she was an alpha. Now, there was absolutely no way she would be able to stop herself from overpowering me.

Finally, Gwen called out once we were downstairs. She was sitting with Alex and Lucian. All of the testosterone in the room was starting to suffocate me. Lucian and Alex rolled their eyes.

"Are you sure you're not just bored since I sent Leon away on border patrol?" Theren asked, smirking at her knowingly. Gwen just threw the remote at him, which he caught with a laugh.

Suddenly, we heard the door open, and Gwen stood up, rushing to Kynan and Arriio. Alex and I followed after her, my curiosity burning.

"Holy crap," Gwen said when she saw the Luna, and she took the words right out of my mouth. My mouth dropped as I saw Reio. She wore her typical leggings and sports bra, but her skin was no longer adorned with scars or bite marks. Even the scar that had run down her eye was no longer present, and both of her eyes were a bright silver. Even beyond the wounds, she looked absolutely radiant. It looked like there was a faint glow around her. She smiled, although it seemed like one more out of discomfort than anything, and it didn't escape my notice that Kynan shifted their stance so that he was standing slightly in front of her in protection.

Theren spoke from behind me. "Kynan, do you still plan on leaving tonight?" Kynan nodded after looking at Arriio.

"Yes, Alex, Gwen, and I will be leaving shortly." Gwen scowled as she said, "Damn it. I was hoping the whole alpha transformation thing would be enough to extend my stay."

"You're more than welcome to stay if you want," Gwendalin there and said as he wrapped his arms around me. "I'm sure my beta would be more than pleased with that." Gwen glared at him, and Kynan diffused the situation.

"I would like to have my weapons master back to training my pack."

"Theren's weapons master?" I heard a voice ask softly, and I was surprised to see that it was Arisio who spoke. Holy crap. She was able to talk now. The alpha transformation had completely healed her. All of our mouths dropped, and once again Kynan stepped in.

"Gwen recently got the position. Since she has the second best aim in the pack and you have another position, she was the best candidate."

"Damn straight," Gwyn puffed her chest out proudly. "Sexiest weapons master there ever was, if I do say so myself."

My mind was still reeling from all of the recent developments. "What is your position now? Do we call you Alpha or Luna?" I asked curiously. Nobody was able to answer that.

Chapter 25.

"You're going easy on her," Arriio called out, pausing from her assault on the punching bag. It certainly didn't feel like Lucian had been going easy on me during the training. I had been pinned numerous times and hit even more. However, he didn't seem to be as rough as Alex had been.

I groaned. "Say that to my bloody lip and bruised ribs." Lucian held out his hand, pulling me up from the ground.

"Sorry," he apologized lowly. "I didn't mean to hurt you. You're just so delicate." I shrugged, surprised by his sincerity.

"It's okay. I'm used to it by now." A week had gone by since Kynan, Alex, and Gwen left Blue Moon. Arisio had been pushing me harder than ever before, and my body had definitely been paying the price, even though Lucian was not as rough as Arriio would have preferred.

"You two keep sparring for a while. I have to go." Arriio abruptly left the training center.

"Where'd she go?" I asked Lucian, whom I had grown significantly closer to over the past week. He seemed much more gentle than his bloodlike counterparts.

"Her wolf needed to be let out. She's just going to go for a run," Lucian answered. "We can end training now if you want. We've been at it for 5 hours. I'm sure you could use a break." I smiled gratefully, bending down to pick up my water bottle, ignoring the soreness of my muscles as I did so.

"Let's get out of here then. It's a nice day outside." Lucian nodded, following me outside. Instead of going back to the pack house, I walked to the field of flowers that had become my favorite place in Blue Moon. I plopped down on the ground, hissing in pain.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Lucian asked, sitting across from me.

"I'll be fine. The training is just a lot," I admitted. "It's starting to take a toll on me." Lucian nodded in understanding.

"Do you feel ready for the challenge?" I sighed. "I'm not sure. Arisio seems to be confident that Brenda won't be as prepared as I am. And Theren, he asks..." I wse. "Theren doesn't like to talk about it, which is so frustrating. You know, he acts like I'm not about to either kill someone or get killed." The truth is Theren and I had been going through a rough patch over the last week. He was hardly present, always busy with packing stuff or with Arriio, the latter of which had begun to invoke deep feelings of jealousy in me.

"Have you come to terms with it?" Lucian asked, his voice soft.

"Killing someone?" I flinched and looked down at a flower I had picked from the ground. "If I'm being honest, no. It doesn't feel right having to kill someone, even if they want to kill me. It feels wrong. It's not me."

"So don't," Lucian simply says, and it feels like his hazel eyes are burning through my soul.

"I don't have a choice."

"There's always a choice," he replies softly.

"Not with this." The andio say, "I start, but he interrupts."

"The andio only know violence."

"There are other ways of life than simply killing your enemies," Lucian responds. And I'm surprised that he doesn't hold their views. "If you get the sheolf to submit, you've won the challenge. Taking her life is optional."

"While it is true that most challenges end in the death of a wolf, that's only because they don't want someone who wants their maid alive."

My mouth dropped. "Are you saying I shouldn't kill her?" I asked.

Lucian shrugged. "I'm saying if you take a life, you're the one who has to live with that."

"Notio, not the not me."

"You. If your wolf is okay with the shewolf submission, and you don't want to kill her, then don't. It's up to you. You're not like most bloodlike wolves," I remark.

Lucian shrugged. "I'm not from Blood Lake originally. In the pack I grew up in, we favored peace over war. Always strive to reduce death instead of perpetuating it."

"What pack are you from?" I asked out of curiosity.

"Windalker. It's unlikely you've ever heard of it. The pack became extinct many years ago," Lucian said, and he looked away, but the sadness in his eyes was obvious. I couldn't help pressing him for more information. I was intrigued by his origins.

"What happened to it?"

Lucian sighed. "It's a long story, the typical story for how packs crumble. A group of rogues attacked the Alpha and Luna, killing them, leaving the pack in devastation and chaos. While the pack mourned the loss of their Luna and Alpha, the rogues were able to release prisoners from the prison. Once the prisoners were released, they wreaked havoc on the pack, slaughtering every wolf in sight. Only a few wolves survived, including the son of the Luna and Alpha, who the remaining wind walkers protected with their life in order for him to escape."

"Where's he now?"

"The son?" I asked, completely immersed in his story. Lucian gave a small, sad smile. "I am the son of the alpha and Luna of the Windwalk pack."

I gasped. "You... You're an alpha?" He nodded, looking at a flower he picked from the ground.

"By blood? Yes. I was 14 when my pack was slaughtered. The wind walkers that survived took me to Blood Lake. Kynan was a new alpha, barely an adult himself. Bloodlake and Windalk were close in proximity and longtime allies, especially since Windwalk was anti-war and didn't have bad blood with any of the packs, including Sons. Alpha Kenan took us in, allowing us to join Blood Lake. I'll never forget the kindness he granted us that day. I owe him my life."

"Why are you only the gamma then?" I questioned. "Surely if you have alpha blood, you're strong enough to be the beta. No offense to Alex."

Lucian side-sighed. "I don't like pack politics. I wouldn't even be the gamma if it weren't for Kynan asking me to step up after all of the turmoil his pack leaders went through a few months ago. He needed strong wolves and knew that I would be more than capable of handling the gamma duties. Most bloodlake wolves don't know my true origins."

We sat in silence before I finally spoke. "So why are you telling me all of this, even if many of your own packmates don't know?"

"I know how you feel," Lucian quietly said, "feeling out of place in your pack. Feeling like things like violence are out of your control. I want you to know that it doesn't always have to be like that. When you become Luna, you don't have to be like that." I hadn't realized that tears were falling from my eyes until Lucian reached over to wipe them from my face.

"Don't cry, Nyx."

"Here, let me cheer you up." I looked at him in curiosity. He held his hand over a patch of grass, and suddenly a bright red poppy sprang from the ground. He picked it and handed it to me.

"How do you do that?" I gasped, looking at the flower, completely amazed and entranced by its beauty.

"It's my gift," Lucian replied, and his eyes were bright with a happiness I hadn't ever seen in him before.

"It's beautiful," I murmured. "My grandmother would have loved it. She appreciated nature more than anyone I've ever met. From a young age, she always taught me to value it, to revere it above all else."

"I miss her a lot," I admit, and wiped more stray tears from my face.

"Shoo, please don't cry, Nyx," Lucian begged.

"I didn't know." I smiled slightly. "They're not sad tears. The flower is beautiful, Lucian. Thank you."

"I'm glad. I'm glad to know that there are wolves out there like you." Lucian smiled as he stood up, offering his hand for me to take. "Let's get you back to the pack house. I'm sure your maid is looking for you." I was sure he wasn't, but I took his hand anyway, taking the poppy with me.

Just as I suspected, Theren was gone for the rest of the day, not arriving back at the pack house until late.

"Hey, little one," Theren said casually as he walked into his bedroom. "Sorry, I was so late tonight. I was..."

"I don't care," I interrupted, my voice sounding strangely harsh and not at all like my own. "It's not like I've been waiting up for you or anything." Theren looked shocked by my outburst.

"Onixa, I don't care about Arriio!" I yelled, and I knew I was about to have severe word vomit, but I couldn't stop the flow of anger I felt towards my mate. "You're supposed to be my mate, not hers. Mine. I could potentially die in a week. And instead of spending my last few days with my mate, he's off doing goddess knows what, leaving me all alone." Theren's mouth was hanging open by the time I was done yelling.

"Little one. I'm so sorry," he begins to say, but I'm sick of hearing his empty words.

"Get out," I say quietly.

"Onixa," he starts, a completely broken look on his face. I could feel the mate bond tugging on me, begging me to be with him, to forgive him.

"I want to be alone tonight, Alpha Theren," I say formally, and his face falls, sending daggers into my heart. "That shouldn't be much of a problem, considering you seem to love being away from me so much." I know my words were harsh, but when his mouth tightens into a flatline and he turns around to leave, I desperately want him to protest, to beg for my forgiveness, to insist on letting him stay.

"Good night, Ona," he says quietly, and leaves the room, closing the door behind him. I shoved my face into the pillow and cried myself to sleep that night, unable to shake the feeling that I am completely, utterly alone.

Chapter 26.

I woke up feeling frustrated, like I wanted to punch something. I pulled on my training clothes, and I could see from outside the window that the sun had barely begun to rise. When I was finally downstairs, I cringed at Theren sleeping on the couch. There had to have been a billion empty rooms in the house. He could have at least slept in one of those, especially since I was not ready to deal with him yet.

As if sensing my presence, Theren bolted upright as he woke up. "Ona, you're up early," he said as he gathered his bearings. "I can make you something to eat. Maybe pancakes, waffles."

"Whatever you want," he offered.

"Not hungry," I muttered. "Which room is Lucian staying in?"

"Third floor, second door on the right," Theren answered, his eyebrows raised. "Why do you want to know where Lucian is?"

"Training," I mumbled, already turning away from him and heading back upstairs. I followed Theren's directions and knocked on the door. After a minute, Lucian answered, his light brown hair disheveled, only wearing flannel pajama pants. I tried not to stare at his enormous chest.

"Ona?"

"Did you need something?" Lucian asked, an eyebrow cocked up.

"Oh, right. Sorry," I apologized. "I was wondering if you would maybe want to start training. I know it's a little early and I completely understand if you'd like to sleep in. I mean, who wouldn't? I couldn't sleep and so I thought maybe if we..." Lucian cut me off with a deep chuckle.

"Relax, motor mouth. Just give me a second. I'll be downstairs in a minute." I nodded, smiling slightly as I turned around and headed back downstairs where Theren was pacing, although he stopped when he saw me.

"I took the day off. I thought maybe we could spend some time together," he said, his eyes pleading to make amends with me.

"Sorry, I have training," I shrugged him off, looking to the side awkwardly. "Maybe Arriio wants to hang out with you." Theren, running his hand through his hair in exasperation. "Ona, it's not what you think. I promise that I do not have feelings for the blood Luna. You're my mate. I would never." He stopped speaking when Lucian reached the bottom of the staircase, his hair pulled into a man bun. He reminded me of Thor from the Marvel movies.

"Lucian, let's go," I said, thankful that he arrived at the perfect time.

"Are you sure?" Lucian asks, looking at Theren, who's glowering at him. "If you want to go train with Alpha Theren, I don't mind."

"Theren's busy," I said shortly, pulling Lucian's hand and practically dragging him outside, leaving Theren standing alone.

"Jesus, Onixa," Lucian said, and pulled on my wrist, stopping me. "What the hell is going on? You hate training."

"Not today, I don't," I muttered and continued my speedwalking to the training center. We reached the building in record time, and I sat on the floor stretching my legs out, wincing as I tried to ease the soreness from the previous day.

"What's got you down, blue eyes?" Lucian asked me as he stretched across from me. I rolled my eyes at the nickname, but it did make me crack a smile.

"It's nothing."

"If it makes you upset, it's not nothing," he says, and he makes everything sound so simple. I sighed as I switched legs. "It feels wrong to say bad things about my mate."

Lucian shrugged. "You don't have to tell me if you don't want to, but bottling your emotions up is just begging for an outburst of epic proportions."

"He's just..." I struggled to find the words. "I feel so distant from him. And it's like, why the hell does my mate feel like the person I know least in the world? Do you think he's pushing me away?" I asked, and I realized that Lucian had become the neutral friend I desperately needed. There was no way I could talk to Arriio, Gwen, Clevette, or Leon about this.

Sighing, Lucian finally answered. "I know this probably isn't the answer you want to hear, but you just need to talk to him, Nyx. If he's pushing you away, he probably has his reasons. You'll only know if you ask. He's probably just stressed."

"Not too stressed to talk to Arriio," I muttered, even though I knew how petty I sounded. Lucian narrowed his eyes at me.

"That's what this is about. You think there's something between the andio?" I didn't answer, and Lucian started laughing.

"Don't laugh at me," I whined.

"I'm I'm sorry, Ona," Lucian said through his laughter as he tried keeping a straight face. His laughter was friendly. It sounded like the wind chimes that used to hang outside my grandmother's cabin.

"It's not that much of a stretch," I pointed out. "They're together all of the time."

Lucian rolled his eyes. "Ona, you know Theren would never cheat on you, and Arriia would never cheat on Kynan."

I sighed and looked away. "I know that logically. I just don't like how much time they spend together. Like he's her priority. I know it sounds selfish. I just want to be his priority."

"Hey, look at me," Lucian said, and my eyes snapped back to his tan face. "I don't think you're being selfish. I think you're lonely."

"That's an understatement," I mumbled, trying not to cry, thinking about last night.

"Ona, talk to him," Lucian pleaded. "Don't just ignore him. It'll only deepen the divide between you two. I'm sure if he knew how you were feeling, he would try harder."

"I just don't understand why he has to try so hard to like me," I whispered, and I couldn't help the tears that fell my face.

"Oh, Onixa," Lucian said as he pulled me into a hug. "Let's not train today. Okay. Want to go to the flower field again? Maybe that would cheer you up." I nodded, and Lucian said, "Good girl. Now wipe your tears, or no more poppies for you." I giggled as Lucian grew a cactus.

"Really? A cactus?" I was promised poppies.

"What do you have against cacti?" Lucian asked, offended. I shrugged.

"Too prickly."

"I'll have you know, my dear Onyxa, that cacti are arguably the best plants to own. Low maintenance, available in all shapes and sizes. Best of all," Lucian's voice trailed off as his hand hovered over the small cacti. Instantly, small pink and yellow flowers bloomed from it. I gasped.

"I didn't know they did that." Lucian smiled at the plant. "The desert isn't always the best place for all flora, but the cactus thrives in the right environment. Enjoys the heat, doesn't despair from it."

"Are you thriving in Blood Lake?" I asked softly. He gave me a half-hearted smile.

"I survive," he said.

"Don't you want more than that?" I asked, knowing I was being far too intrusive. Lucian side-sighed. "There's not much more out there for me. My mate, she passed when the rogues attacked. We were young, but our wolves recognized it. My wolf felt it when she died." I grabbed his hand and squeezed tightly.

"I'm sorry, Lucian."

"So, to answer your question, do I want more than to survive? Maybe, but for now, surviving is enough," he answered and flicked his hand. In the direction he waved to, half of the field turned from sunflowers to poppies.

"You have the coolest gift ever," I said in awe. "I used to use my gift to make flowers, too." Lucian's head cocked to the side.

"Your gift used to." I winced, knowing now I would have to explain my loss.

"My gift was black magic. I know it sounds evil, but I wouldn't. I didn't use it for bad things."

"I didn't think you did," Lucian said gently. "It got taken away. When I was kidnapped, which sounds scarier than it actually was, you know, considering I can't actually remember any of it." I tried making a joke out of it, but failed miserably.

Lucian frowned. "I'm sorry you went through that, Ona. Losing your gift. I'm sure that was horrible." I hesitated before speaking. "I think I think part of me blames Theren. I felt much safer as a rogue than I do here. I had everything I wanted as a rogue. Freedom, my gift."

"You had a boyfriend," Lucian said in surprise. I glared at him.

"Gradon was not my boyfriend. We were just friends."

"But you wanted to be more," Lucian grinned, and I scowled.

"Being nosy is a horribly unattractive trait," I teased him, and he snorted.

"You are literally the most nosy person I've ever met in my whole life."

"Watch your mouth, or I'll turn the flowers you're sitting on into cacti," he warned, but couldn't keep a straight face as he did so. I laughed, and he joined me. And soon we were both laughing hysterically in the field of flowers. And as we freely rolled around laughing in the poppies, I felt my heart begin to mend.

Chapter 27.

"Are you ready to stop being a coward and confront your mate?" Lucian finally asks after we've spent hours basking in the sun. I sigh, never wanting this moment to end. I feel perfectly content, surrounded by nature, letting the sun warm the coldest parts of my soul.

"I guess so." Lucian gets up from where he was lying on the ground, extending a hand for me to take, which I accept. He uses too much strength, and I collide with his chest.

"Sorry," he mutters, stepping back and yanking his hand away from me like I had electrocuted him.

"You destroyed the flowers," I point to an area of the field with smushed poppies showing an outline of his body. Lucian laughs, and with a wave of his hand, the poppies are upright, leaning towards the sun. A photo tropism, he had called it. When flowers lean towards the sun, leaving the darkness behind them.

"So sensitive about your puppies," Lucian teased me, and I scoffed.

"You kill enough plants in your lifetime, and you'll start feeling guilty too," I say in reference to my gift, but for the first time, I feel optimistic that I'll be okay without it. As Lucian says about the flowers, they lean towards happiness and away from sadness.

We walked in silence back to the pack house, and halfway back, I asked quietly, "Do you think it would be better if werewolves didn't have mates? You know, like humans, they just fall in love with whoever they want, and it's their choice."

Lucian side-sighed. "I don't know how to answer that. Ona, part of me says no. I don't think that would be better. I think if I had gotten a fair chance with my mate, I would be the happiest man alive. Having your other half, who wouldn't want that? But other times, when I can't sleep at night, feeling so lonely, so haunted by my dad's empty space, I wish I would be able to move on. Forget the past as easily as humans do."

"Don't Don't take your mate for granted, Onixa. If I just had one more day with mine," Lucian swallows loudly, and I can see tears welling back.

"You deserve more than just surviving, Lucian," I whisper as I grab his hand tightly. "Your mate would have wanted you to be happy, to move on."

Lucian gives me a half smile. "I know she would have. She was the most kind person on earth. Never had any ill will towards anyone. She would have made for an excellent Luna, had her life not been stolen from her."

"I'm so sorry, Lucian," I say hoarsely. And I don't know what else to say besides that. To have your mate, your family taken from you so young.

"Lou," he said, and I cocked my head to the side at Windalker. "They called me Lou. I thought I would never want to hear that name again, but you remind me a lot of the people there." I grin as we approach the pack house.

"Well, Lou, how good are you at cooking?" I'm starving.

"This is the best mac and cheese ever." I groan as I eat my second bowl.

"It's craft mac and cheese from the box, Nyx," Lou rolled his eyes. "Yeah, but after eating your failed attempt at a grilled cheese sandwich, this tastes like the finest cuisine in Blue Moon." I bring my hand to my mouth, giving a chef's kiss.

"Hey, I tried," Lucian said defensively. "I didn't see you in the kitchen trying to make anything either, Gordon Ramsay."

"Fine, fine. Next lunch. Prepare for your mind to be blown," I say, making an explosion sound as I push my hands out from my head. Lou rolled his eyes.

"I'll remember that, Nyx. Or should I call you Rachel Ray?" I smack him upside the head, and he laughs, readjusting his man bun.

"Can I braid your hair?" I plead.

"Absolutely not," he deadpans.

"Oh, come on. I'm going through a really rough time right now, and I think if you would just let me braid your hair, then it may actually take away some of my sadness. In fact, I recently read a research paper about how braiding hair leads to low..." Lou interrupted.

"Jesus, Onixa, fine. If it gets you to shut up, then you can braid my hair." I squeal, clapping my hands together.

"Go over to the couch and sit on the floor," I order, and he obeys, rolling his eyes. He sits on the floor in front of the couch, his back resting against it. I kneel on the couch behind him and undo his bun.

"Why do bloodlike men have so much hair?" I mutter, raking my fingers through his light brown hair. Lou laughed.

"Hey, now, it's better than Son's mop of a head." I laugh.

"I don't know. I kind of like the long hair. Has anyone ever told you that you look like Thor?"

"I have no idea what that means," he says. "Seriously."

"Ouch." He groans as I yank through a knot. "Oops. Sorry, Lou. In my defense, you should have brushed your hair this morning." I cringe as I run my fingers through another knot.

"I wasn't aware I would be harassed into having my hair braided," he muttered quietly as I began the braiding process. When I finished, I turned him around so he was facing me.

"Ooh, you look like such a pretty princess," I coo, reaching for the braid, and he gently smacks my hand away.

"I'm going to remember this moment the next time we're training, and then we'll see who the real princess is." He rolls his eyes, but the smile on his face contradicts his irate words.

"I think you'll always be the prettiest princess, Lou. I wouldn't worry about me taking your crown." I shrug, and he reaches for a pillow, hitting me in the head with it.

"Oh, you little..." I'm about to grab a pillow off the couch when I hear the front door open. Theren walked through the front door, followed by Arriio.

"You've got to be kidding me," I whisper to myself in disbelief.

"Onixa," Theren says, and starts walking over to me, but I avoid him, heading for the stairs.

"Ona, please don't be upset. Theren and I were just..." I heard Arriio's voice say as she takes a step towards me, blocking the staircase. My voice is deadly quiet.

"No offense, Luna, but you are the last person in the world I want to talk about my mate with." For the first time, I think I see hurt flash across her face, and it's almost enough to make me apologize on the spot. But then I think of all the times Theren leaves in the early hours of the morning to be with her, and all I can see is red.

"Excuse me," I say as I walk around her, going upstairs. Unlike last night, Theren is unwilling to leave me alone, and I can hear him following close behind me.

"If you want your room, I'll stay somewhere else," I hiss spitefully at Theren as he closes the door behind him.

"Don't do this, Onixa," he says, his eyes dark and wild. I can hear panic coating every word. "Please just hear me out, okay? If you still want to be left alone afterwards, I'll give you your space. I promise." I'm about to shoot him down again when I think of Lou's words.

"Fine." Theren sits on the side of the bed and asks, "Come sit with me."

"I'll stand," I say numbly, crossing my arms over my chest.

"Uh, right. Okay, that's fine," Theren says quickly. And I can see his leg bouncing nervously. "Let me start from the beginning, okay? Don't get mad when I talk about Arriio. I just need you to hear me out to know where I'm coming from." I nod silently, confirming that I'll hear him out.

"I met Arriio last year in the woods. She was escaping Kynan. Actually," he laughs at the memory, and I can't help but smile, which crosses my face before I remember that I'm supposed to be mad and wipe it off. "I remember thinking, 'Dear Goddess, Kynan is going to have his hands full with this one.' She tried killing me. Do you know that? The first time she saw me, she pulled a knife and hurled it at me with no questions asked, no hesitation. Obviously, I took her back to Blue Moon with me. Of course, I didn't tell her that Kynan is my cousin because I knew she'd make me imprison her until he arrived. A nightmare. The next day, Kynan shows up to collect her, and I can immediately see the chemistry between them. The spark. The mate bond is stronger with those two than I've ever seen in my life. Even as she was trying to kill him, I could see it. Could see why the moon goddess had matched them together. Their anger, it burns hot, even hotter together. It was incredible to witness, even though I was worried about their future. I mean, how were they supposed to recover from their tumultuous start? Kynan had Arriio imprisoned for a month before she escaped. I warned him not to do that, that it would make her hate him and he would never be able to win her back. Of course, because it's Kynan, he didn't listen to me and just did what he wanted anyway. But they did recover from that. From all of the horrible things they did to each other at the beginning. Against all odds, they got through it. Kynan was happier than I had ever seen him. He would call me on the phone to tell me about whatever amazing thing Arriio had done that day. For the first time since his parents died, I saw that light in his eyes again, and I could see him begin to become whole. They were going to complete the blood ceremony the night that Wilton had kidnapped her. Kynan almost went insane looking for her. And when Wilton tricked him into thinking she was dead, I saw a part of him die. That was a dark week for Blood Lake for me. The man who had killed my parents had Arriio, the one person who had made Kynan human again. Once Kynan had found her alive, I vowed to myself that I would do whatever it took to see Wilton to ensure that Kynan and Arriio could live a happy, peaceful life together. But Wilton was an infestation, a plague. Kynan told me of Arriio's nightmares. Brutal dreams that ended with her being pregnant and losing a pup. Traumatic dreams that left her shaking in fear every morning. When she arrived here, the dreams didn't stop. I could hear her scream in the middle of the night, some nights even throwing up for hours. I tried to help her out by taking her hunting every morning. She needs violence as a release, and I could see her gradually starting to get a little bit better. The screams became further and fewer in between at night. This last week has been harder on her. The alpha transition is terrifying, especially going through it alone. Her mind is in complete chaos right now. And and I remember what that was like to feel like your body isn't your own. To not understand your strength, your power, to be at war with yourself 24/7. So, I've tried to be there to help her since she has been here for you. If I hadn't asked her to stay to help train you, she would be with her mate right now. And I do not doubt that the transition would be easier for her if her mate were around. But because with you, Onixa, I'm selfish. I'm keeping her from her mate so that she can be here with you. I'm so sorry that I've been distant lately, and I'm even more sorry that it has you doubting my feelings for you. I think I don't know how to be a good mate. I know that I spread myself thin. Try to be there for everyone all at once. Forget to be with what? No. Who makes me happy? Forget that my mate is my sole purpose for being alive. The source of my happiness, the light of my life." Theren says, and I can hear his voice crack. "Ona, I'm so sorry I hurt your feelings, that I wasn't able to see how upset you were sooner. I'm not the best with reading other people's emotions." He scratches his head uncomfortably. "I can do better. I know I can. Just please give me a chance. I will do anything to make you happy," he pleaded. I can feel myself tremble slightly, my emotions hitting me hard. Theren is at my side in an instant, picking me up and carrying me to the bed where he sits down, but doesn't stop cradling me even as I begin to cry.

"Shh, little one," he soothes me, holding me tighter. "Sorry, I don't know why I'm crying so much lately," I apologize through tears. And Theren wipes away the water with the pad of his thumb.

"Oh, Onixa, you don't have to apologize for anything at all," Theren murmurs. "Just talk to me, okay? What can I do?"

"I thought..." I start. And I hate how small and weak my voice sounds. "I thought when I got a mate, everything would immediately fall into place. You know, my grandmother always talked about her mate like... like he hung the moon and the stars. She told me I would never feel alone once I found him. It feels like since you found me, all I've done is feel alone. I understand you wanting to be there for Arriio. I really do, but I need you too," I whimper, completely baring my soul to my other half.

"Little one, there's..." as he tightens his arms around me, rocking me slightly. "I promise you'll never feel alone again, okay? For as long as I live, I'll be there. Whenever you need me, no matter what." I finally was able to calm myself, stop the tears, and slowly relax into my mate, trying to convince myself to trust him, that everything would be okay. I didn't know what I would do if it weren't.

Chapter 28.

I couldn't sleep. Who would be able to fill my position? I was about to get either killed or possibly kill someone. The anxiety over the threat left my stomach in knots. Not even having Theren hold me through the night was enough to quell my fears. I could barely stop my hands from shaking as I pulled on a pair of black leggings and a black crop top, trying to channel some of Arriio's intensity.

"How do you feel?" Theren asked quietly from behind me as I braided my hair in the mirror. My hands were shaking too badly to make tight braids, and I made a frustrated sound as I decided to leave them loose.

"How do you think I feel?" I muttered sourly.

"They're inside."

"I know, little one. I know. I'm so sorry. It'll be over soon." Hopefully, he doesn't mean my life, I thought bitterly to myself as we went downstairs where Arriio and Lou were sitting, eating breakfast. Arriio didn't look up, her concentration fully on her smoothie. Lou looked at me in curiosity.

"I have to go help set everything up for the challenge," Theren apologized. "I'll see you there, okay? I won't be able to talk to you because, well, you'll see."

"You'll do great, little one," he said as he pressed his lips against my forehead. "Everything will be fine. See you soon." With those words, he left the pack house, and I realized that it could potentially be the last time I ever felt the touch of my mate. Everything I do could technically be the last time I do it. And the thought made my stomach plummet.

I ate a bowl of cereal, barely able to swallow, and everything tasted like dirt. Lucian went to sit on the couch and called me over. I went over to him, my legs feeling like jelly.

"Sit down. I'll fix your braid," Lou said quietly. At the look of confusion on my face, he said, "My mom taught me how to braid hair. Said my mate would appreciate it." I nodded, swallowing thickly. His hands were gentle as he undid my messy braid and replaced it with a much tighter one. Arriio sat across from me as he continued working on my hair. Her face was completely blank, a serious mask that sent chills down my spine. She really is the most lethal wolf I have ever met. Attack first, she

reminded me, repeating the exact words she had beaten into me over the last few weeks. "After you first injure her, do it again. Don't wait for her to strike back. Go for the throat. If she's protecting heavily there, which I'm assuming she will be, go for the legs. Incapacitate her quickly, however you can. If you get injured, don't show any pain. Don't show any fear. It'll just encourage her wolf, and the next attack will be more brutal and assured than the last."

I nod, completely numb. Lou reassuringly squeezes my shoulder. I heard a knock at the door and Arriio practically sprinted to answer it. Alpha Kynan and Alex came for the challenge and were going to take Arriio back to Blood Lake later that night. Arriio threw herself into Tina's waiting arms and they shared a passionate kiss as Alex greeted me. "Onixa," he said, no traces of humor or friendliness in his tone as he grasped the seriousness of today.

We wasted no time with pleasantries as we started heading for the clearing that Arriio showed me beforehand where we had been training me in wolf form. I wanted to throw up from the sheer number of people from the pack gathered. I couldn't even see the center where I would be fighting Brenda. As we got closer, Arriio said quietly, "Pick your head up, shoulders back. No fear." Easy for her to say. As she pulled up her black mask, revealing only her eyes beneath her dark fur cloak, she looked downright scary, even more so with the blood alpha at her side. Looking as threatening as ever, only wearing a pair of worn jeans. His muscular chest and back were covered in tribal tattoos, which only made him look all the more dangerous.

Wolves parted as Alpha Kynan and Arriio walked in front of Alex, Lou, and me. Power swirled around them with such ferocity that a few wolves were unable to help themselves from falling to their knees in submission. As we got closer to the center, I was surprised to see Leyon standing next to Theren, who had silver chains wrapped around himself, tethered to the ground. "Oh my god," I whispered in concern for my mate. Arise's voice penetrated my mind. "It's so he can't interfere with the challenge. His wolf will be going crazy trying to save you. The silver chains will stop him." My mouth went dry as I responded. "And if the chains aren't enough," gave a half smile. "Kynan and I will restrain him if necessary." I nodded weakly, meeting Theen's apologetic gaze. I looked away, unable to see my mate so helpless. Brenda stood on the other side of the clearing, her eyes burning through me.

Leyon's booming voice echoed through the clearing, commanding all of the attention of the wolves. "As you all know, we are here today for a Luna challenge. Brenda Lockheed has challenged Onixa Knight, Theren's mate." He emphasized the last word, making Brenda skull for the Luna position. "Once the challenge begins, no wolves are allowed to interfere regardless of what happens. The challenge will only end once either Wolf submits or is incapacitated. If there are no questions from either challenging wolves, please step to the center of the clearing and we will begin." Brenda and I silently stepped to the center a few feet away from each other. Her eyes were emotionless and I hoped mine mimicked hers.

"Wolves shift," Leon ordered. We both shifted into our wolves, and I tried not to notice that her tan wolf was slightly larger than my black one. Arriio had warned me that she might be and not to let that get to me. I felt reassured that Arriio, one of the most petite females I've ever met, had taken down so many larger wolves. "When I say begin, there is no turning back. And the challenge has officially commenced," Leon declared, and his voice was the only sound I could hear. "10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, begin."

As soon as he said the word, I launched myself at Brenda, who, as Arriio predicted, was unprepared for the immediate attack. I was able to latch my teeth onto her shoulder before she shook me off, and I snapped my canines again in the same area, but she was better prepared now, dodging the bite. We continued snapping at each other for a while, and as Lou advised, I let my wolf take over, controlling every attack and every defense. I couldn't deny that we were evenly matched. Every time I was able to sink my teeth into her, she was able to do the same to me. She had been able to rip out a piece of my leg, an injury that had begun to slow my attacks, making me slightly off balance. I could see why Arriio had pushed for such brutal training, why she had no qualms with sending me back to the bloodied and bruised. It had made me stronger, more capable, more resilient. Brenda didn't seem accustomed to such brutality. She had wailed loudly when I had torn out a chunk from her neck and had begun to sway. Like Arriio taught me, I showed no mercy, using her unsteadiness against her. I pounced, and she was too slow to defend herself. My wolf was on top of hers. My canines latched around her throat. I could have torn it out right then and there. I would have, but I stopped when I heard another whine from her. Her eyes had closed and her wolf stopped struggling from underneath me. Her neck extended, the ultimate sign of submission.

"Brenda, if you are submitting to Onixa, you need to shift into human form," Leon stated clearly. And in the next instant, she was back in her naked human form. I still had my teeth in her neck. I hesitated, feeling at war with myself. Arzio told me to kill her no matter what. But then I remembered Lucian, how he showed me that I didn't have to be a brutal monster, how I could be different. I wasn't a Reeio and I never would be. I didn't even want to be. I realized as I shifted back into my human form. Nudity was a non-issue, especially among werewolves, so I didn't feel embarrassed. My primary emotion, as stupid as it sounds, was concern for Brenda, who had blood seeping from her neck at an alarming rate. Nobody moved until Leon's voice bellowed. "Onixa Knight is the winner of the Luna challenge. Brenda Lockheed, if you survive, you will live the rest of your days as a rogue, forever banished from the blue moon pack and territory."

My eyes never left Brenda's bloodied body, twisted at an unnatural angle, even as a blanket was wrapped around me, arms wrapped around me. Theren, I continued staring at Brenda as nobody made a move to help her. I was going to go up to her when Arizio's voice resounded through my head. "Last lesson, Onixa." Arriio was suddenly in front of Brenda, leaning over the picture of death in all black. I didn't see her following action, unable to make myself scream, even as I saw Arriio carelessly discard Brenda's heart to the side.

Chapter 29.

Dinner was awkward to say the least. I felt unnerved by the way visions of Arriio holding the bloody heart continued to flash through my mind. "That is the alpha that wolves cower at the mere mention of. I had seen glimpses of her viciousness before, but never so brutal. So gruesome."

"So when will you two love birds have your mating ceremony?" Alex asked casually, breaking the silence. I looked at my plate, which was the last thing on my mind. "Soon," Theren answered shortly, and I was glad he didn't seem keen on talking about it. "He's here," Arriio suddenly says, standing up. Kynan is by her side in an instant, wrapping his tattooed arms around her protectively. "Who's here?" he asked calmly, but I could sense his trepidation. "The invisible rogue that attacked me in the woods," Arriio hissed, and my heart almost dropped to the bottom of my stomach as Kynan shouted, "The what? The invisible rogue?"

"I question. No, no, no. It couldn't be. I hadn't seen him in months." Arriio sprints outside, all of us following her. I see her summon a whip, randomly lashing out. Suddenly, I see Gradon's body on the ground with deep cuts throughout his body. "Huh? Got you, you little son of a-" Arriio begins to say, but my eyes meet his. "Gray," I whisper in disbelief.

"You know this person?" Alex asks me in surprise. I nod desperately. "He's my best friend. We were rogues together." Theren's grip around my waist tightens as Ken calmly states, "If he harmed my mate, he will face consequences." My mouth drops open. "You can't hurt him. He's basically my brother. You can't hurt him. It was just a misunderstanding, I'm sure. I promise." Arisio laughs, but it contains no humor, and her eyes are pitch black, something I hadn't seen from her before, and to be honest, it rattled me. "He told me to rot in hell. I don't think there's much to misunderstand about that." I take a step towards Arriio to explain, to make amends. Kynan shifts Arriio behind him, and Lucian and Alex are instantly at his sides. Their eyes blink. "Please, Arrio, if you attacked him, then he was just defending himself. He wouldn't just attack you for no reason," I plead, begging her to see it from my point of view. Gradon had been my only friend for many years, my only confidant after my grandmother died. Arriio raises an eyebrow, and I can see Gradon struggle in the whip's hold. "Actually, I was just minding my business when he stabbed me. Unprovoked, might I add. Oh, sorry. Both times he stabbed me. Unprovoked," Aizio clarifies and Kynan snarls.

"It was not unprovoked. Gray roared. You killed my mate." My mouth dropped open. Gradon never mentioned that he had a mate, much less that she was dead. "Ona Arizio isn't who you think she is. She's the reaper," Gray hissed. I gasp as I look at Arriio who looks indifferent. Bored almost. She was the wolf whom rogues told horror stories about, the boogeyman parents used to scare their children into behaving. And she had been under the same roof as me for the last month. "Is Is that true?" I ask, hoping she denies his accusations. "You're the one who kills all of the rogues, innocent or not?" Arriio gives a half-hearted shrug, entirely apathetic for the implications. "You saw her rip the heart out of the she-wolf that challenged you," Gray insisted. "She had submitted and the reaper still ruthlessly killed her. How can you be friends with someone like that?" I wailed as I look at Arriio who looks unconcerned. "You didn't have to kill Brenda. She had already submitted. There was no reason to take a life." Arriio gives me a patronizing smile that makes me feel two inches tall. "Ona, there's a lot you don't understand." I scoff. I can't believe her. She pointlessly took someone's life just because she could. And I was the unreasonable one. "What? Because I'm not a brutal fighter. I couldn't possibly understand." Kynan growls venomously at me. "Watch it, little wolf," he warns. The raised one of his hands. "I think we should all take a step back here. There's no need to escalate this. Let's calm down before making any hasty decisions." How could he so calmly refer to their killing Gray as a hasty decision? I'm not going to let them hurt Grayon. You know how important he is to me. I glare at him. I didn't doubt that had I never met Gray, another rogue probably would have killed me or worse. My words unknowingly infuriate Arriio. "You knew he was the one who did this to me?" She pulls open her cloak and I gasp when I see a nasty gash over her chest. "And you didn't tell me?"

"I wasn't sure," Theren muttered. And that was when everything went wrong. Kynan yelled at the before he shifted into his wolf. and Theren pushed me back out of the crossfire as I cried out, launching himself into the air, turning into his own wolf. Kynan and Theren clash, and my brain can't even make sense of how fast their attacks are. A flurry of snarls and snaps. They were attacking with such brutality that one misplaced bite could easily kill the other. I take a step towards Arriio. All I want to do is end the fighting and all of the pointless violence in which no one wins. I'm surprised when Alex snarls at me, shifting into his wolf. Leon launches himself at Alex, letting his wolf side take over. Soon, everyone was fighting, even Lucian, whom I had grown to see as a close friend, was snapping his canines at Jackson as if he wanted to harm him. I hadn't wanted this. All I wanted was to stop the violence, stop the death. But I couldn't just let Arriio kill the only family I had left. The person who had filled the gap in my whole life left by my grandmother. I see Arriio and Gray fight. And I know he's no match for the brutal female, whether she was injured or not. Her attacks were too precise, too clean. "No!" I cry out, but the sound is lost in all of the snarls and growls. I desperately try to use my gift to no avail. I see Arzio pin gray to the ground, drawing a knife with a smile that fills me with profound rage. Rage so deep, so intense, it's like something inside of me snaps. I can feel power coursing through my veins as I raise my hand, instantly darkening the ground underneath our feet. In a desperate attempt to save my only true friend, I use every ounce of energy to form a black ball of energy, launching it at Arriio. It hits her in the side and she's thrown off gray with a scream that breaks through the chaos. Immediately, the fighting ceases. Everyone turns into their human form and Kynan is the first to see Arriio, picking her up in his arms effortlessly as she examines her side, which is so dark from the bruise that it looks black. The bloodlike wolves looked at me in rightful accusation.

"Leave," Theren commands, his voice booming in the night. "Not without the rogue." Kynan growls animalistically. The turned to look at me and all I could do was hope. Hope that he understood that I had to protect the only aspect of my former life. "Not an option. You're on my territory. He's my prisoner. This isn't a fight you'll win, Kynan. Don't make me call my warriors," Theren says. And despite his aggressive tone, I can sense underlying pleading. Everyone holds their breath, waiting for an order for an attack. "Don't do this. We can all go our separate ways, unharmed," Theren says, and Arriio scoffs. I wailed, feeling guilty for her wound, but not guilty enough to abandon my friend. "You're lucky we're on your territory, Kynan finally hisses. You're even luckier you were my family." I cringe at his use of the past tense. Theren gives a curt nod and understanding. "Jackson, go get their belongings and bring them to their cars." I exhale in relief as they finally pile into the cars. Not a single word said, only stern glares passed among us. When they're gone, Theren tells Leyon and Jackson to take Gradon to the prison and lock him up. I flinch, but I know that it's where Gray is safest for now. "Thank you," I say to Theren gratefully. I know that he has given up a lot for me to keep great on, and that meant the world to me. He didn't look at me for the rest of the night.

Chapter 30.

Two years earlier. "Gray," I call out into the woods. He had been gone for hours, and he usually always made sure he was home by dusk. The sun was low, almost lost in the night completely. I go deeper in the woods, ignoring Gray's past warnings to never stray from our cabin. "There are far worse nightmares out in the woods than you're ready for," he had said. "Gray." I call out again and my initial annoyance at his tardiness turned into concern. "This isn't funny. I'm worried." I heard someone walking through the thick brush and exhaled in relief as I turned to face gray. "Thank the goddess. What have you been doing?" My heart stops beating when I see that it isn't grayed on at all, but an unfamiliar rogue. He's not the ugliest guy I've ever seen. Tall, muscular, and with big blue eyes. "Oh, sorry. I apologize. I thought you were someone else." He grins, flashing his canines wickedly. "I can be whoever you want me to be, darling." "Um, no thanks," I quickly say. "My um friend is looking for me. He'll be here any minute." The rogue looks around the surrounding forest. "I don't see him anywhere. And if I recall, you were the one shouting his name. I don't think he's looking for you, D." I take a step back in fear, not liking the sinister look in his dark eyes. His grin widened at my actions. "Run if you want, darling. You won't be able to escape me." "I don't want to hurt you," I warn, and he howls in laughter. "You couldn't if you tried," he promised. I raise my hands, draining a nearby tree of its life force, creating a ball of energy. "Please leave," I plead. I don't want to hurt him, regardless of what his skis he is. He raises his hands in surrender, backing away slowly. I exhale in relief as his figure disappears in the woods. I turn away, allowing the energy to dissipate into the air. When I turn back in the direction of the cabin, I shriek in surprise as the rogue is standing face to face with me. He shoves me to the ground, pouncing on me like I'm his prey, and uses one of his hands to pin mine to the ground above my head. And I'm unable to use my gift. I struggle from underneath him, but he's twice my size and far too heavy for me to throw him off. "So beautiful," he whispers, using his free hand to trace the side of my face. When his finger gets close to my mouth, I snap at him, managing to bite his finger. He hisses in pain, withdrawing it, but he only looks amused. "You're lucky I love a fighter." I sob as he kisses my cheek and down my neck. His hand grabs my thigh and I'm helpless, unable to stop his hand from roaming higher. Suddenly, the pressure from his heavy body disappears, and I hear a loud growl. My sobs of fear turn to relief when I see Gradon's wolf on top of the rogue, his teeth latched deep around his neck. His wolf turns to look back at me, growling and jerking his head to the side, warning me to look away. I shift my gaze away from them, flinching as I hear the rogue's screams and the sound of tearing flesh. I hear Gradon's footsteps get closer to me. He shifted back into his human form. I'm still sobbing as Gradon gently picks me up off the forest floor, cradling me to his chest. "I am so sorry," I cry. "I shouldn't have left the cabin." "Shush," Gray soothes me. "Let's get you back home, Nyx. It's not your fault. I love you."

Present day. "Go fish," Gradon says through the thick silver bars that separate us. "You're totally cheating," I mutter, taking another card from the pile on the damp prison floor. Gradon snorts. "You're such a sore loser, Nicks. Always have been." "And you've always been a cheater," I argue. Gray rolled his eyes. "How can I cheat? I'm literally locked in a cell. If anything, you're probably cheating." I shrug. "I don't know how, but I know you are." Gray scoffs. "Whatever. I'm sick of this stupid game anyways." "We could play solitire or maybe war," I suggest. "We've already played both of those today. I'm sick of card games," Gray groans. "I went, 'I know. I'm sorry. I know this isn't ideal.'" Gray glances at the silver chains that restrain him and burn through his skin. "Obviously," he says drily. "I promise I'll get the to release you soon. I swear. I just need more time." Gradon scoffs. "I tried to kill the Luna of blood like twice. There's no way he's going to let me out of here." Sighing, I put the cards back in the box. "Well, can you blame him? Arrio is like his best friend. Or was, I guess." I frown. Gradon leans back against the dirty wall, pressing his feet against the bars. The cell certainly was not roomy. "No, I actually see why he has to keep me locked up, which is how I know that he will never let me go. I just need some time." I hesitate. "You know, you know things aren't great between us right now." "No. I thought you spent all of your time in a dark cellar with me for the last month because things were going great between you and your mate," Grace sarcastically responded. His tone softens when he sees the hurt look on my face. "Look, Nyx, I'm sorry that I'm the reason you and your mate aren't getting along. I really didn't know that's how that night was going to turn out. If I did, I never would have shown up." "Why did you?" I question. "Why were you spending so much time around Blue Moon, especially with the person you tried to kill still around?" Gray sighed. "I already told you. I just wanted to make sure you were okay after the challenge. You took quite a few bad hits. I just wanted to make sure you were doing okay. Plus, I didn't trust the Reaper around you." "She hasn't ever hurt me," I say, but then quickly correct myself. "Well, not outside of training, at least." "She would have if she knew you as a rogue," Gray argued. "She has no problem with killing. You saw how little she cared. Even when you confronted her about killing my mate," I wailed, remembering Arriio's blank face that night when I asked if she was the one mercilessly slaughtering rogues. I heard footsteps coming down the hallway and Leon walked towards where I was sitting on the floor. "Luna, it's time to leave," he said stiffly. Leon was infuriated by my decision to defend Gray and it had driven a wedge between us. I nod, getting up off the ground. "See you tomorrow, Gray," I say, and he smiles. "I'm counting on it. I have nothing else to do." Leon walks in front of me, guiding me back to the pack house. Today was the first day that the had allowed me to see Gradon unsupervised. Not that he had been supervising me because that would have meant spending time around me, something he avoided. And I didn't blame him for it. I felt consumed by guilt that he was now fighting with the only family he had left. The only thing that kept me grounded, unyielding, was knowing that Gray was still alive. I knew Leon blamed me for worsening tensions between us and Bloodlake, but what was I supposed to do? Stand idly by while Arriio stabbed my only family left. I didn't want to fight with Theren anymore. But the separation between us made me feel a million miles away from him. When we returned to the pack house, I decided to take the risk of rejection and went to his office where he had been spending most of his time over the past month. I knocked on the door. "Come in," he called absent-mindedly, and I opened the door. He looked up from the mountain of papers on his desk in surprise. "Hi," I quietly say, suddenly regretting reaching out. "Hi, Onixa," he said, quirking an eyebrow up. "Do you need something? I'm working." I nervously fiddle with my sleeve. "Um, no, I guess not. I just wanted to talk. Can it wait? They're inside. I have a lot of paperwork to deal with right now." I nod. "Willis, you come back to our room tonight?" The stares at me, his face revealing no emotion. "Maybe. I might have too much to do. I'll try." "You said that last night," I mutter. "I had a lot of work last night, too." They're in dead pants and I cringe. "Right. Sorry. I'll leave you alone," I mumble, quickly, leaving his office, closing the door behind me. I go up to our room, throwing myself on the mountain of pillows, unable to stop the sobs that rack me. Everything had turned into such a huge mess so quickly, and I didn't know how to fix it without having to sacrifice my best friend. Eventually, I can calm myself down enough to fall asleep. Halfway through the night, I awaken to Theren pulling me into his arms. "They feel like ice against my warm skin." "I promised you I'd be there for you," Theren whispered. "That you wouldn't feel alone again. I won't go back on my word." I relax into his arms, his words unknowingly releasing a deep tension in my muscles. And in that moment, it felt like everything was going to be okay.

Chapter 31.

"Tell me about her," I finally gained the courage to ask and Gradon sized from behind the bars that separate us. "I don't like talking about it, Nyx. There's a reason I didn't tell you about her before," Gradon warned, and his eyes flashed in pain. "Please," I ask quietly. "I want to know about her. Maybe it'll help you to talk about it." Gradon closes his eyes, swallowing thickly. "Her name was Avalon. I met her in the woods when I left my original pack. She was a rogue. Had been her whole life. Her parents were kicked out of their pack long ago, so she was born into it. She was looking for berries when I saw her humming a tune I didn't recognize. Her voice was like warm honey. Her scent drove my wolf insane, and I knew right away who she was to me. I nearly scared the hell out of her when I wrapped my arms around her. In hindsight, not a good idea to sneak up on an unsuspecting she-wolf. She stomped on my foot." Gradon laughed slightly. "Of course, she too felt the mate bond between us. I took her home with me that day after we gathered all of her items from her house. The mate bond is a hard thing to fight. Impossible even. She was beautiful, of course, but her soul was the most remarkable aspect of her. Very kind, generous, soft. We fell in love quickly, and she often told me it felt like she was in a fairy tale. One night, she made us dinner, lit candles, the whole thing. She was so nervous she knocked a glass of water on me. When she got a towel to help dry me off, she told me she was with Pup." Gradon's voice cracked, and I inhaled sharply. I was ecstatic, obviously. We stayed up all night talking about names, arguing about what gender we thought the pup would be, and even debating what to paint the nursery. She was so convinced it was a boy, but I knew it would have been a girl, my princess. Two weeks later, she went into the woods to find berries. During her pregnancy, she couldn't eat enough of them. I offered to get them for her, but she refused, saying she was going crazy being inside for so long. told me she would be right back. Shortly after, I felt the bond snap, and I lost the other half of my soul. I tore through the woods and found her with a knife in her neck. No doubt the work of the Reaper. I had come across plenty of bodies just like hers before I met her, and I could smell her scent faintly in the body." Gradon has tears streaming down his face. "I thought it was safe," he whispered. "We moved far away from where the Reaper was known to frequent. I hadn't known that she had been pushing deeper into the woods, each time going further than the last." I wiped the tears off my face, my hands trembling slightly. "Gray." Gradon took a shaky breath. "Arrio is not the person you thought you knew. She killed my mate and my unborn pup. I had to try to kill her for my mate, for my pup. Thinking about getting my revenge was the only thing that stopped me from taking my own life. Until I met you, of course, and you brought light into my darkest days. Reminded me how good people can be." I gulped. "Gradon, I don't blame you at all for what you did. If Theren knew, I'm sure he would understand." Gradon snarled harshly, making me flinch. "Theren is the last person who would understand. He would have put the knife in my mate's neck just as quickly as the Reaper." I grimace. "No, he wouldn't. He wouldn't hurt a helpless she-wolf. Arisia would, but he's different." Gray scoffed. "All of those alphas are exactly the same. Wake up, Ona. Your mate is just as ruthless as the rest of them. Don't be stupid." Cringing, I lean away from the bars. "You're wrong. The moon goddess would not give me such a cruel mate." Gradon leaned forward, his eyes glowing dangerously. "So ask him. Ask him if he's ever killed a rogue she-wolf without reason. Then you'll learn just how horrible your mate truly is." "You're wrong," I shake my head slightly. "I should go," I say abruptly as I get up off the ground. "No, don't go, Nicks," Great on side. "I'm sorry. I know you can't handle facing the truth of the monster in your bed." "That's not an apology," I hiss, leaving him in the cellar alone.

"You're not focusing, Onixa." Theren says, and I growl in frustration. "I'm trying," I say defensively as the black mist from my magic dissipates into nothing. "Magic used to be so easy for me." The rubbed his chin pensively. "Maybe when you got your gift back, it reset everything you know how to do and your body is relearning how to use it." I considered his words, thinking that was a good enough explanation. It did feel like I was a young pup again, desperately trying to contain the power and manipulate it to my will. "You have to focus. Guide the magic with intention," Theron instructed. He twirled his finger in the air slowly and shaped the gray mist into two wolves that ran through the air. He flicked his hand and they disappeared. "Wow," I exhaled. Until times like these, I had always forgotten just how powerful my mate truly is, his skill being much more developed than mine. "Try again," there uninstructed, standing still in the clearing. "Imagine your magic as an extension of yourself. You are in complete control of it. It will do your bidding if you are confident in your choices." For the last hour, we had been trying to do one of his favorite uses of magic, using the mist to restrain someone from moving. I sighed, draining the life force from nearby trees. The grass underneath me already dead. I held my palms out, moving the magic towards him, the black fog swirling around his ankles and crawling up his legs. He took a step forward immediately, causing the fog to dissipate into the air. I groaned and he sighed. "You're distracted," he muttered. "What's on your mind, Ona?" I scratched my head awkwardly. "I don't suppose you've considered letting Gradon go?" The stilled, his eyes gazing at me intensely. "Absolutely not. He is a traitor. He tried to kill the person who killed his mate." I defended him in exasperation. "Anyone would have done what he did. He tried to kill Aluna Onixa." The voice was sharp, making me flinch. "Do you realize how serious of a crime that is? Regardless of his reasoning, he committed an act of war against Bloodlake. By allowing him to live, I committed an act of war against Bloodlake." "That's not fair," I cry out. "Arriio can't just go around killing whoever she wants and then declaring war on those who seek retribution. How can you not see how wrong that is?" "It's not my job to determine the morality behind Arriio actions there," he hisses. "If I release Gradon, they will declare war on Blue Moon. I will not put the lives of my pack members in jeopardy for a rogue, no matter what he is to you." "If you hate rogues so much, you never should have taken me," I snarl. "You could have left me alone. I never wanted this, any of this." Theren looks like a wounded puppy as his eyes soften. "You don't mean that, Ona. We're mates. We are meant to be together." "No mate of mine would keep the most important person in my life locked up until the end of time," I say. "You are lucky I didn't let the blood Luna kill him that night." Darren growls. "I cannot believe how ungrateful you are being. I have put the future of my pack at risk by straining my relation with Bloodlake." "They have been our allies since the dawn of time." "They are tyrannical," I shout. "You let them terrorize innocent people in the name of peace. It is a gross abuse of power and it will never end." "We are wolves. Onixa." Theren shouts back and I cower, having never been yelled at by him before. "We kill. It is what we do. You have no understanding of our kind." The turns his back on me, taking a step towards the pack house. "Would it even matter to you if I told you that she killed his mate when she was with Pup?" I ask quietly and he pauses for a moment and I know he heard me. He didn't say a word as he went into the pack house telling me everything I needed to know about my mate.

Chapter 32.

Theren and I didn't talk for the entire week. We stayed out of each other's way during the day and at night he did not return to his room nor did I ask him to. During the day, I mostly kept to myself, taking books from the library and bringing them to the field of flowers to read or visiting Gradon. Our long-standing minor dispute finally resolved. He was right about the about all of the alphas. I only wish I had seen it sooner. I basked in the warmth of the sun, a book on my lap, and plucked the petals off a poppy that Lou had once grown for me. Longing for the familiar face and kind words of the wolf, I sent him a text risking rejection. Despite how close we were while he was staying in Blue Moon, he had fought against us in the scuffle, and I wasn't sure if he hated me as much as his alphas surely did. I sent him a simple, "hey," and he responded almost immediately. "Nyx, how are you?" I exhaled in relief at his casual, caring response. "Doing okay, all things considered. How are you?" I reply quickly, drumming my fingers nervously along the side of the book while I wait for his reply. "I am well. I miss you," he responds, and I grin widely, laughing for the first time in a week as I feel a huge weight lift off my shoulders and the sun starts to feel a little warmer. "I miss you, too. I don't suppose you'll be taking a trip down to Blue Moon anytime soon?" I ask, already knowing how ridiculous that sounds. "Unfortunately, not, Nyx. I'm not sure things will ever blow over. It's bad here," he says, and I frown, asking him what he meant. "The blood alpha and Luna are upset, to put it lightly," he responds and I wailed. "Do you think they will declare war?" I ask and hope I'm not crossing a boundary. "He is their gamma after all." "I don't know, Nyx. Is the rogue still imprisoned?" he asks and I toss my phone to the side wondering if Kynan or Arriio told him to ask. I didn't think Lucian would double-cross me, but I cannot clearly judge character. Alphas especially. How could I be so dumb, so naive? The had always been out hunting rogues, and I had deluded myself into thinking they may have been dangerous, but Gradon had always known otherwise. But how do I get myself out of this mess? At this point, I couldn't see Theren and me having any future together. Our values were clearly misaligned, and we could barely even look at each other anymore. We would never be able to see eye to eye on this, and there is just no way I can let Gradon rot in prison while I dally around in the flowers. Do I tell him that I reject the mating bond and I want him to let Gradon and me leave? Is that what I want, even if he were to agree to it? I couldn't imagine that he would willingly let me go. Not after everything we have been through. If he lets us go, he could always just tell the blood alphas that he killed Gradon and I left him. They would have no way of knowing. Am I able to let go of my mate? Do I even want to? Sure, we have our fights, but don't all mates fight? Surely, our fights were no worse than Kynan and Arriio's. I mean, he punished her for her actions. I thought back to my Graham's last conversation with me in which she promised that when I found my mate, I would never feel alone. But since meeting Theen, all I have felt is crushing loneliness. Not the kind of alone that is comfortable, but the kind where you feel like you're invisible to everyone in the outside world. But I have been pushing Theren away. Sure, he may be doing the same to me. I'm sure we could come to a compromise, some agreement that would make both of us happy, and we could move on with the rest of our lives together. He hadn't even marked me yet, which is no doubt the longest any Luna has gone without being marked. Luna, the word nearly made Bal rise in my throat. I never wanted this. I never wanted to be part of a pack, much less lead one. If Arrio was the kind of person made to be a Luna, I knew for a fact that I certainly am not a Luna, nor do I want to be. But the thought of leaving Theren felt like a knife wrenching in my gut. I couldn't reject the mate bond, no matter how seemingly mismatched we were. Mates are a gift from the moon goddess, and to reject one would be wrong. I was so lost in my internal monologue, I didn't hear the person who snuck up behind me and knocked me out. I woke up in a bed, completely confused and with a wicked migraine. I groaned as I rubbed the back of my head, feeling the dried blood matting my hair. I tried to use my magic but was unable to. No doubt given a dose of wolfsbane. I looked around the room, taking in my surroundings. The walls were painted light blue, and the bed I was on had silky white sheets. The bed, mind you, I was chained to with a rope around my ankle. The rope around my ankle was connected to the bed post, but it was long enough that I could get out of the bed and walk around the room. I looked in the closet, which was filled with both men's and women's clothing. Weirdly enough, all of the female outfits looked exactly like things I myself would have picked out. I looked out the window to see a heavily wooded forest, reminding me of the view from the cabin I once shared with Gray. The sun was setting and the sky was a beautiful lilac color, so enchanting I almost forgot I was taken. "We're like that, you know, the kind of people who take the time to watch the sunset." I whipped around as I turned to look at the speaker and likely my captor. "I know you. You took me before, didn't you?" I stammered out as I looked into his piercing green eyes. The man winced and scratched the back of his head awkwardly. "As much as I wanted to loathe him, I couldn't deny that he was one of the most attractive men I had ever seen. Tall, muscular, tan, and with messy brown hair. "I'm I'm sorry we have to keep meeting like this. I really hate how I've had to do this." I scoff, surprisingly bold for someone who is imprisoned. "Have to. You didn't have to take me, much less hurt me." The man flinched. "I had to get you here somehow. You wouldn't have gone willingly. For what it's worth, I am sorry about your head. I already had a healer look at it, and you'll be fine within a few days." He took a step towards me, and I took one back like two magnets with the same pole pointed at each other. "You don't have to be scared of me," he pleaded and I scoffed. "Oh, that's just rich coming from my captor," I say. and he continues taking steps towards me until my back is against the wall. My breaths are shallow and when he lifts his hand, I flinch, closing my eyes, waiting for the attack. A moment passes and I open my eyes. He withdrew his hand. "I wouldn't hurt you, Onixa," he insists. "You're my mate."

Chapter 33.

For a minute, I'm stunned into silence. Then I can't help the laughter that escapes my mouth. The man looks at me like I have lost my mind, which I suppose I may have. "This is just great," I say through my unstoppable laughter. "I got taken by an actual crazy person. This is just wonderful." The man says calmly, and I have to shift my eyes away because his gaze is intense. "Ona, I am not crazy. We are mates." "No," I say slowly like he's an idiot, which he clearly is. "Theren is my mate." The man sighs and rolls his eyes. "I know that is what you believe, Onixa, but it isn't the truth. We are mates. Haven't you wondered why you and Theren don't get along? Why you feel like the moon goddess made a mistake in making you mates?" I inhale sharply as he raises his hand once more, but he merely brushes his hand across my forehead, tucking my hair behind my ear. As he does so, his touch sends a strange current through my body. "Aren't you wondering why your body responds like that to my touch? Do you deny your attraction to me, mate?" He asks softly, and he dares to sound hurt. I use all of my strength to shove him backwards by the shoulders. "Do not call me mate, you psychopath," I hiss, and he just looks at me with those eyes I have the insane urge to ignore. He turns around and I call out, "Wait." "Just let me go," I say as he turns back around to face me. "We clearly are not mates, and you clearly need help. We can find you a good therapist." He shakes his head sadly. "Soon you will see, Onixa. We are mates, but do not worry, little wolf. I will give you time to come to terms with this." I can't help the rage that flows through me. And this man makes me far angrier than Theren ever had, inspiring a fire so deep inside myself, I may as well have burned alive. I grab a vase off the bedside table and throw it at the back of his head as he is about to leave the room. It smacks against his skull, and I can see blood flow from his head as the glass shatters. But he doesn't look mad as he turns around one final time before leaving. "I deserve that," he says quietly, leaving me in the corner of the room, confused, scared, and utterly alone. I pace around the room as much as I can with my ankle still roped to the bed, and consider how to get out of this. I don't have access to my magic, but I had been without it for months. Surely I could come up with another way. Ironic as it is, part of me wished Arriio were here. As intense as she is, I had no doubt she would have handled the kidnapper and escaped. Probably even having extra time to stop for a snack. What would Arriio do? Summon a weapon and act decisively, that's for sure. However, I had no weapons on hand. And even if I did, I wasn't sure I could use one effectively. I stared at the shattered glass on the floor and I smiled, almost hearing Arriio's voice yelling at me to use the glass as a weapon. I pick up a long, sharp shard of the shattered vase and hide it under my pillow. I sit on the bed, my back resting against the headboard, and think about my next move. He was a big man, and I wouldn't be able to subdue him by raw force alone. He didn't even flinch when I broke a vase on his head. No, I would have to play this smart if I wanted a chance at getting out alive. I felt slightly emboldened by the fact that he thought we were mates. I doubt he would hurt someone whom he thought was his soulmate, but who can predict a person's actions. However, I could use his delusion against him. I've seen plenty of Criminal Minds episodes, and I knew that I had to play into his delusion, make him trust me, think that I'm buying into all of this nonsense. Then, when he least expects it, I stab him with the glass. Despite his delusion, I still cringed at the thought of having to hurt him. But I have to. I won't be the dumb girl in a horror movie who only slightly wounds the villain before leaving only to have him come back still alive and even more dangerous. Yes. Yes, I would play the role he wanted me to. A loving mate, one who accepts her fate. Surely then he would trust me and let his guard down. A small voice in the back of my head, against my will, considered his words. Could we actually be mates? It would explain the sparks when he touched me, but that could be some kind of illusion, some game he was playing at. Is that even something that could be faked? My train of thought was interrupted when the door knob started to turn slowly, and my heart was nearly beating out of my chest, and I fought the urge to throw up from anxiety. I forced

My shaking to stop and wiped all of the emotion off my face as I had seen Arriio do countless times. Not that she ever really had any feelings to begin with.

He regards me tentatively, clearly expecting another outburst. He raises both hands in surrender. "I just want to talk. Please, Onixa, just hear me out."

I give him a short nod and he continues. "I know it sounds crazy because you met the first, but we are mates. The moon goddess made a mistake by pairing you with the for I am your true mate. I had her blessing to take you from him so you could be with your rightful other half."

I stay quiet as if considering what he is thinking. Obviously, he hasn't been taking his medications because you can't just talk to a goddess. Much less would she give someone permission to take someone else. Clearly, he's delusional. But I remain calm.

"If we are mates, why take me? Why not just do things the normal way? You know, dinner and a movie. Not a concussion and imprisonment," I say, because I do not want to come off as eager or he will certainly realize what I am up to.

He sighs and his face is full of despair. "You wouldn't have come willingly. You are too blinded by Theren for now at least. I deeply regret how I've handled this, and you have no idea how much it pains me to hurt you. I know how confused you must be, and I'm sorry. I don't expect you to accept me right away, nor understand this."

Despite his eccentric behavior, his words sound genuine and sincerely apologetic. "You didn't have to knock me out," I said quietly. "I would have listened to you, tried to understand."

He grabs my hand, and it takes everything in me not to yank it away. "I should have known," he said, his tone just as quiet as mine. and I tried to meet his intense gaze. "You are much better than the wolves of Blue Moon. More rational, considerate. I'm sorry for doubting your kindness, little wolf. I should know that your goodness and kindness are endless."

"Endless," I repeat. "That's a quote."

He looks surprised. "Uh, yes. Yes, it is. You're very well, Reed."

I see. I shrug. "I grew up isolated. I made do with what I had," I say.

"And it's an accusation." For now, he is the one trapping me. His eyes shine in sadness. "I promise, little wolf, once things are better between us. You will have your freedom. More freedom than you could have hoped for in Blue Moon. I I'm sorry it has to be this way for now. I don't I don't like seeing you despair."

I'm surprised when he releases my hand and begins to leave. "Wait," I call out and he turns around. "I don't know your name."

His eyes dare to be hopeful. "An island of ignorance in the midst of dark seas. Fine. My name is Fineian."

Chapter 34.

I'm restless, unable to sleep that night, half expecting Fineian to show up, and the thought makes me clutch the shard of glass for some semblance of control over a situation that is so so clearly out of my control. Once the sun began to peek through the windows, I knew it was only a matter of time before he came back, turning my stomach in a combination of fear and anxiety.

Sure enough, I heard a soft knock at the door. "Come in," I quietly say, although I'm sure he would have anyway. "It's not like kidnappers are known for abiding by boundaries."

The door opens slowly, and he looks nervous as he walks in, holding a tray of food and beverages. I raise an eyebrow at the large assortment of breakfast foods. He scratches his head awkwardly as he places the food on the bed. "I um didn't know what you liked, so I just made everything."

I nod, surprised by his thoughtfulness until I remember that I'm chained to the bed like a wild animal. I hesitate as I pick up the fork. "I didn't poison or drug it or anything," he quickly says. "I can eat some of it first if you don't believe me."

Shaking my head, I spear a piece of fruit. "It It's okay. I believe you," I say quietly. And for some odd reason, I really do. He seemed nervous, shy, and awkward. If it had not happened to me, I never would have believed that he was capable of kidnapping someone.

He exhales in relief. "Good. Okay, that's good."

I eat in silence, realizing that I haven't eaten in a while. "Do you like it? I can get you something else if you want," he offers timidly.

I gulp the orange juice nervously. "No, the food is lovely. Thank you."

"I um brought you a book," he says, his voice soft as he pulls out a thick book.

"A tale of two cities?" I question, inspecting the cover. It's worn like it's been well-loved and well read. I flip through it and see that there are notes in the margins, words underlined, and some pages folded at the corner.

"Yeah. Uh, I'm sorry it's not in the best condition," he frowns, looking at it.

I shrug. "I do the same thing to mine. It makes rereading them better."

He looks at me, his eyes widening slightly. "Yes, I know exactly what you mean."

"Have you read it?"

"No," I murmur, putting it to the side. "Never got around to it. Although now I suppose I have nothing but time on my hands."

Fine winces at my words. "This This is just temporary, Onixa. I promise you that much. I just need you to understand this first."

"What exactly am I supposed to understand, Finineian?" I question, my voice dangerously low. "You've taken me twice, dropped the mate bomb on me, and for some reason, give me food and books. What exactly do you want from me?"

"All I want is you," he whispers. "A future with you as mates. I know. I know that I haven't exactly given us a very good meet cute, as they say. But we are perfect for each other. Ona, you're my other half."

I stare at him, looking for signs of deception, but finding none. Unnerving because that means he fully believes in his delusions.

"Are you going to take my gift away again?" I ask quietly, and I can't help my voice from cracking pathetically.

His face twists into sadness. "Oh, Onixa, I am so sorry I had to do that the first time. I didn't have a choice. Never again." His hand reaches out for mine, and I fight the urge to pull away, despite the warmth that stems from his touch.

"There is always a choice," I say, echoing what Lou had told me what felt like an age ago.

His thumb strokes my hand. "If if you knew why I did it, you would understand. I know you would because you are my soulmate."

"So tell me," I suggest.

He sighed deeply. "You have no idea how badly I want to. But I can't not yet. Soon I swear to you."

"So what next?" I ask calmly, though I feel anything but. "You just keep me here, chained to the bed until your moon goddess tells you it's okay to give me back my free will."

Fine flinches. "We both know as soon as I untie you, you're going to run back to Theren. I can't let you do that."

"Please," I whimper, deciding maybe appealing to his emotions is my best chance. "Just untie me. I won't run. The rope is just bothering my skin."

A lame excuse, and we both know it, but it seems to do the trick. He moves to the bed post and pulls out a knife. I flinch, but he soothingly says, "I'm just going to cut it off. I promise I won't hurt you."

I nod, trying to stop my shaking. He grabs my ankle gently and swiftly cuts the rope. He puts the knife back into his back pocket and holds both hands out. "See, I'm not going to hurt you. I released your restraints and now we can start to mend things between us."

Delusional. Absolutely bonkers to think that by releasing me from the trap he put me in, he was doing a favor for us.

"I'll run you a bath," he mutters. "Sorry, I should have offered sooner." He goes into the bathroom and I hear the faucet run. I decide not to run because he is obviously expecting me to. He looks surprised when he returns to find me in the same position he left me in.

"There's um clothes in the closet for you," he nods to the closet. "If you don't like them, I can always get you more. I uh wasn't sure what you liked."

I nod, waiting for him to leave, but he continues to stare at me with those piercing emerald eyes. I gasp, horror flooding through my body. "You're not expecting. I mean, you're not going to."

He looks at me in confusion before realization sets in. "Oh no." He curses under his breath as his eyes widen in shock. "I mean, sorry, no, I'll leave you be." He quickly exits the room and I exhale in relief. I mean, seriously, what is wrong with this guy? He is the worst captor ever.

Rumaging through the drawers and the closet, I pick out a pair of jeans and a white blouse. I'm relieved when all of the undergarments are modest, stylishly so. I would have had a meltdown if I found any inappropriate lingerie. I bring the clothes into the bathroom, locking the door behind me, even though for some reason I know that Finine wouldn't intrude.

I stop the water from running, and I can smell the lavender scented bubble bath he poured in the tub. I almost want to laugh at how much he used. There are nearly as many bubbles as there is water. He clearly had no idea what he was doing, but he tried. Tried to make something to bring me comfort and happiness. I would have been less confused about this situation if he had just treated me differently, but here we are.

I sink into the tub, thankful for the warmth it brings. After a while, I could feel my muscles begin to relax. I examined the bottles on the side of the tub, and he has thought of absolutely everything, including a conditioner specifically designed for curly hair. What kind of captor puts this much detail into their captor's comfort? Surely, he had no plans to hurt me if he had invested so much in trying to make me stay. More than that, he wanted me to want to stay of my own volition. Yeah, right. He's out of his mind if he thinks I'm going to fall victim to whatever delusion he's trying to inspire in me.

"Ona, are you okay in there?" I hear his voice call out anxiously, and it's muffled. He had even waited outside the bedroom door. Wow, he was really trying to play the role of a kind captor.

"I'm fine," I call out. "Be out in a minute." When I get out, I'm going to make my move. I brought the shard of glass into the bathroom with me, and he would have no idea it was coming.

I drained the tub and dried myself off. I looked through the cupboards where there were all types of hair and skincare products imaginable. "Weird," I whisper. After drying myself off, I get dressed, tucking the shard of glass into my waistband, as I had seen Gwen do with countless weapons. I suddenly longed for her to be here, even Arriio. As much as I couldn't stand her, they would have been able to get out of this. They would have been strong, unyielding, fearless.

I take a deep breath as I open the bathroom door, and as I suspected, he is not in the bedroom. I sit on the corner of the bed, lying in wait. Sure enough, after a few minutes, there's a tentative knock on the door.

"You can come in," I call out, my heart beating erratically. I desperately hoped he wouldn't be able to hear, but it was impossible to tell since I had no idea what his actual strength level was. He enters the room, looking at me cautiously, but his eyes twinkle in something I don't recognize.

"You look lovely, Onixa. Bathing can do that." I try to sound casual, but there's a strain in my voice. If he hears it, he does not indicate as he gestures to the spot on the bed next to me. "May I?" he asks.

"It's your room," I say with a tight smile.

"I had it painted before you came," he said quietly as he looked at the walls. "They were white before."

"Thought if it looked like a hospital, it would freak you out."

"You thought the walls would be what freaked me out?" I asked, and I can't help but giggle. "You tied me to a bed, and you thought the walls would be what I was concerned with."

Fine gives a breathless, nervous chuckle. "You're right. I suppose that does sound silly, doesn't it?"

My eyes wander to his neck, and I see a long scar running down it. "May I?" I ask, curious about it.

He nods, extending his neck to give me a better look. The scar is puffed up slightly, and I can't even see the entirety of it as it runs past his shirt collar. I shakily reach out my hand, and he does not attempt to stop me as I pull down the collar. I was right. The scar runs deep.

"How?" I asked, surprising myself by actually caring about the explanation. He sighs. "It was a long time ago. Let's just say not all rogues are as gentle as you."

"Sorry," I say quietly. "It looks like it hurt."

"And I am sorry for what I'm about to do."

He shrugs. "It's not your fault, Ona. I'm just thankful I have lived long enough to meet my mate. Not all wolves are as lucky as I."

"How are you so sure?" I asked, shifting slightly on the bed so I could reach the glass more easily. "How are you so sure we are mates?"

"How are you so sure we aren't?" he counters, raising an eyebrow. "We fit together perfectly. Our interests, our personalities, they blend seamlessly. Your hand," he grabs one of my hands, encasing it in his. "Fits perfectly in mine."

"I'm scared," I whisper, which is true, but not for the reason he thinks.

"I know," he says softly and pulls me into his arms. "I haven't given you any reason to trust me or even like me for that matter."

I can't stop a tear that falls from my eye. "I'm so sorry," I think to him, hoping the moon goddess forgives me for what I'm about to do. Without him noticing, I clutch the glass shard in my hand so tightly I can feel the glass cutting into my palm. I quickly raise the shard and bring it down, intending to stop him.

Suddenly, before I know what even happened, I'm pinned to the bed on my back. Fine holds the glass in his hand. "I wish you hadn't done that," he mutters. My eyes are saucers as he gets off of me, and I'm waiting for him to take action. He gives me a sad look, but doesn't say anything as he leaves the room, closing the door behind him.

I run to the door, trying to open it, but he's locked me inside. Pounding on the door, I can't stop the sobs that rack my body. "Let me out! I screamed through tears as I continue to bang on the door, even kicking it a few times to no avail. You can't keep me in here forever." I sob as I beat my fists against the door so angrily I can feel one of my knuckles shatter. But my words were a lie. He could keep me here forever. And there was nothing I could do about it.

Chapter 35.

I awoke to the sounds of birds chirping outside. The sound was so familiar that for a brief moment, I almost thought I was back in the cabin with Gray until the events of the previous night came crashing over me like a tidal wave. Confused, I remembered that I had fallen asleep on the floor by the door last night. Now I was placed in the bed, tucked in. The hand I cut on the glass and hurt while I was pounding against the door was bandaged. Even more confusing, I didn't have one leg roped to the bed.

I swung my legs over the side of the bed and stood up, my legs wobbling slightly. I went to the door, turning the knob slowly. To my surprise, the door wasn't locked, and I quietly took a step into the hallway and peered my head around the corner. I didn't see anyone, so I continued walking through the house, which resembled more of a cabin. The walls and floor were made of wood, the ladder covered with soft rugs. There were pictures on the walls and I didn't waste time examining them, though I did notice that Finineian was in a few of them.

Leaving the cabin proved more difficult than I initially thought, as there was a series of hallways with what seemed like hundreds of doors. I wondered if Fineian lived here with others, as it seemed way too big a house for just one person. I turned another corner and crashed into a girl about my age. She had short blonde hair and bright blue eyes. I grabbed her hand and whispered intensely, "Come on, we have to go. There isn't much time."

She looked at me in surprise. "Hurry," I hissed. "A psychopath took me. We can leave before he comes back." Her eyes flashed in recognition, sending terror through my spine as she giggled. "I told him that taking you was a bad idea. But did he listen?" "Of course not."

"No, no, no," I whispered in horror as I yanked my hand away and started to back up slowly.

"I won't hurt you," the girl said. "We just want to talk."

I collided into a wall that sent electricity through my body. No, not a wall, Finineian. "Ona, I see you met my sister," he said smoothly as I jumped away from him. "Calia, leave us for a minute." The blonde girl glares at him and turns away, but before leaving us in the hallway mutters, "Told you taking her wasn't the right way to go."

Fine rolls his eyes, but they soften as his gaze falls on me. "How is your hand? Why did you leave the door unlocked?" I ask directly to the point as I narrow my eyes and cross my arms.

He sighs. "I don't want you to be a prisoner here, Onixa."

"So, you're letting me go?" I say in surprise.

"Well, not yet," he says slowly and I scoff.

"I just want to talk. Just hear us out and if you still want to go, I'll let you. That's all." I clarify. "I listen to you talk and then I can leave."

He nods solemnly. "I won't stop you from leaving. You have your magic back. You could leave now if you wanted to. I'm just asking you to hear me out."

"I don't owe you anything," I say, my voice hard, emotionless. I don't recognize it as my own.

"No, you certainly don't," he agrees. My eyes narrow further as I examine his face for any signs of deception. Surely, he wouldn't just let me go. Not after all of the hassle of getting me here. I should turn around and sprint for the door, using my magic to stop everyone in my way. But the pleading look on his face stops me. Plus, he said he would let me go if I listened. And I at least want to know why he took me and why he thinks we're mates.

"Fine," I say hesitantly. "But I'm leaving right after."

He exhales in relief, nodding. "Come, let's go downstairs. There are some people I want you to meet." After seeing the look on my face, he elaborates. "They will help it all make sense. I promise."

He leads the way, easily navigating the corridors. We finally reach the front of the cabin where a group of four wolves is sitting in the living room with the blonde girl I ran into earlier. "Onixa, this is my family," Fineian says with pride. "You already met Kalia. Sitting next to her is Astra, a girl with pinstraight dark hair nods once, her face serious, though Kalia is smiling. Astra is Willis's mate, a guy with short black hair waves, his expression friendly. The two serious looking twins are Ronin and Dean." The two males looked almost exactly alike with shaggy blonde hair and bright blue eyes, but one of them had a long scar running down the side of his face.

The one with the scar scoffs. "Who are you calling serious looking? I'm the most attractive person here."

Calia snorts. "I'd take row over you any day." The corner of the other twin's mouth turned up slightly at that, but he said nothing.

Fine interjected. "Please, guys, focus for one second, would you?" His tone is somewhat annoyed, but anyone could see the affection he felt for the wolves. "Onixen needs to hear about what we do here."

One of my eyebrows quirked up and all of their faces became solemn at his words. "I guess I'll start the story from the start," Fineian says, his voice much clearer and confident than it was when it was just us. He takes a seat on the arm of a reclining chair as he talks, but I stay standing in the entry, ready to bolt immediately if necessary.

"Kalia and I were born as rogues. Our parents fled a tyrannical alpha, deciding that even living in the wild was safer than living under his rule. Despite their best attempts to lay low and avoid dangerous rogues, they were eventually killed when we were in our teens. Despite how difficult some rogues may be, we met friendly ones throughout our youth. People like us, people who didn't want to live under the control of alphas who just wanted to be free. Upon their death, I realized that I wanted to create a safe place, a space where rogues could live without fearing for their lives every second. Most rogues don't live more than a few years in the wild. You know, the life expectancy is low. One of the worst aspects of being a rogue is that wolves often sacrifice years of their lives just for the chance to avoid living under the oppressive rule of alphas and packs. So, I spent years building this house, a house big enough to fit entire families of rogues. Kalia and I would run into rogues and invite them to stay under our protection. Some declined, but others, like everyone in the room, decided to stay. Today, we house 50 rogues. They are bound by no rules except not to harm innocents and most importantly to look after one another. Despite the dangers of being a rogue, we have found strength in numbers, in looking out for one another. Rogues who may have turned aggressive or violent due to years of living in fear and solitude now have a place to live in peace, a family. You were a rogue, Onixa," he says as he turns to me. "You know how dangerous it is to be alone. We fight that. Fight for each other. Stay," he insists. "Help us find the lone rogues. Bring them here. Protect them. All we want is peace, safety. You would never have to deal with pack politics with alphas." He says that last word scornfully.

I stand in shock considering his words. So Kalia asks finally, none of them daring to break the silence besides her. "What do you say? Stay or go?"

Chapter 36.

The members of his pack or whatever stared at me expectantly. Fine realized my gaze was focused on them and must have known how uncomfortable I felt answering in front of them because he told them to give us a minute alone. They clear out and once we're alone, I give him my answer.

"Look, I appreciate what you do here," I tell him earnestly. "I think it's great that you made a safe space for rogues and give them a home."

He gives me a sad smile, already knowing from my tone what my answer is going to be. "But I can't stay here," I continue. "I have a pack, a mate. I can't give all of that up no matter how much I respect what you do."

He flinched at the word mate, but nods and wipes all of the emotion off his face as he speaks. "Very well. I understand. I'll take you back right away if you wish."

"I can find my way back. You can let me go alone."

"Absolutely not," he says seriously. "Firstly, you have no idea where we are. You wouldn't be able to find your way back. Secondly, I'm not going to let you go into the woods alone unprotected."

I nod knowing he's not going to let it go. And honestly, that was probably a good thing because I don't have a great sense of direction and make a hobby out of being taken. He doesn't make eye contact with me as we walk through the doors of the house. He walks by my side and says nothing as we continue to walk away from what he hoped would be our future. I turn around to look one last time at the house, but to my surprise, it's disappeared. There's only a large empty clearing of grass.

"Where did it go?" I ask in surprise.

"It's enchanted to hide once you leave the borders of the house," he answers, still not looking at me.

"Enchanted. How?" I ask out of curiosity.

"I can't answer that in case you run back and tell Faren about this," he says quietly. After a moment, I swallow thickly. "I wouldn't do that because you know he would destroy us all for daring to live as rogues."

Fine scoffs. "I don't answer because we both know he would." And the thought makes me ashamed to have someone so cruel as my mate.

We plunged deeper into the forest, taking random turns, and I realized that Finineian was right. There was no way I would have been able to navigate the woods by myself, and probably would have accidentally ended up crossing into another Pack land.

"There aren't many rogues out here," I note after we'd been walking uninterrupted for about an hour.

"We've recruited most of the rogues in the area. The rest have been killed by the Reaper," he says scornfully.

"The Reaper?" I echo.

"She's never found her home," he asks, making eye contact with me for the first time since I told him I wanted to leave. "Oh, shoot. I had forgotten that all rogues just assumed the Reaper was male, as I had done before figuring out their true identity."

"She or he?" I try shrugging indifferently. "It could be a girl. You never know."

He stops, grabbing at my wrist, so I'm pulled near him. "Do you know who the Reaper is?" he asks intensely.

I gulp, unsure of what to say. "No," I choke out.

His green eyes narrow. "You know something?"

I shake my head furiously and he pleads. "Please, if you know something, tell me. Not just for me, for the safety of my family. I can't keep them safe from the Reaper if I don't know who it is."

"You have to promise not to go after her," I say finally.

Shaking his head, he says. "I can't promise that."

"You have to or I won't tell you," I beg.

"She will kill you if you try to attack her."

He scoffs. "I'm not scared of the reaper."

"Then you are a fool," I chastise him. "She is lethal in every sense of the word. She will kill without mercy, and she is the strongest wolf alive. She will destroy you and everyone you know if you go after her," I warn and I am absolutely sure of my words.

"Okay. Okay," he says, "I swear to the moon goddess that I will not pursue her. I just want to know her identity to keep my family safe. I swear to the moon goddess cannot be broken."

So I nod slowly. He's right. He can't protect his pack if he doesn't know what or who to look for.

"The alpha of Blood Lake," I say finally.

"Kynan?" he asks in surprise. "I thought you said the Reaper was a girl."

I shake my head slowly. "You don't get it. His maid is an alpha. She's strong, deadly. You can't win against her," I warn him. "She's more cruel than Cynan."

"Don't approach her."

He nods. "I won't. I promised you I wouldn't and I wouldn't put my family in danger by having them go after her if she's as dangerous as you say."

I exhale in relief. "Good. Just keep your pack away from Blood Lake and they'll be okay."

He nods again deep in thought and removes his hand from my wrist, leaving it feeling cold as soon as his touch is gone. We continue to walk, and after a while, I begin to recognize some of the area.

"We're about half a mile away from the border," Fineian says, his voice slightly strained. "I can't take you any further without the wolves patrolling to smell me."

I smile slightly. He really was letting me go. "Thank you," I say quietly. "For letting me go."

He nods silently, and I can't read the expression on his face. He no longer looked at me with the adoring expression he had when we were at his home. In a moment of equal parts boldness and hesitation, I grab his hand, unable to see him so distraught, even if he is a delusional captor.

"You'll be a good mate to someone someday, Finineian," I say genuinely, and I mean every word. "You're a great guy and have a huge heart. I'm I'm sorry for hurting you. I just have to go back." My voice cracks slightly.

He shakes his head sadly. "You are my true mate, Ona. I wish I wish you could see it. But since you can't and don't want to be with me, I won't force you. If you ever change your mind about joining our cause, follow the North Star. You'll find us. I will never stop waiting for you," he whispers, and my eyes water.

"Goodbye, Finineian," I say softly, squeezing his hand one last time before pulling my hand away. I walk towards the border of Blue Moon. I don't turn back, but I can feel his eyes burning a hole through me.

Chapter 37.

I continue to walk down the vaguely familiar path, and soon enough, I see a wolf I recognize from seeing around the pack house. Olivar, I think I remember his name being. He squints as if he can't believe what he's seeing.

"Onixa, is that you?" he calls out, rushing towards me. Nodding, I stand still as he approaches, scanning my body for any wounds.

"Are you injured?" Olivar asks frantically, his eyes dark.

I shake my head and he exhales in relief. "Thank the goddess for that. I mind linked the I found you. He's going to meet us at the infirmary. He wants you checked out immediately."

"I said, 'I'm fine'," I lash out for some reason angry.

Olivar looks taken aback. "I know, Luna. It's just a precaution."

"Sorry," I mutter and he guides us towards the infirmary. I don't know what's gotten into me.

We approach the building where I can see the pacing anxiously, running a hand through his thick hair. When he sees us, he rushes up to me and throws his arms around me.

"Ona," he chokes out, his voice full of emotion. "You're here. You're safe." He sniffs my neck, my hair, and pulls away. His eyes scanning me for wounds, just as Olivar had done. A primal urge to check the Luna for injuries. "Your hand?" he grabs my hand gently. "It's wrapped. What happened?"

I gulp. "I don't remember."

"You don't remember anything at all?" he asks in surprise.

"No," I whisper. "It's the same person from last time, isn't it?"

The snarls angrily, though I know it's not anger towards me. His eyes darken and I can see his body shaking. "Let's go get you checked out," he mutters, his voice gravelly. He picks me up, cradling me gently in his arms, carrying me into the building.

We go to a sterilized room where a healer is waiting. Then places me on the corner of the bed, stepping away as the healer comes closer. "Hi, Onixa," he says, his tone light and gentle like he doesn't want to scare me. "My name is Daily. I'm just going to do a few tests and make sure you're healthy. Would that be all right?"

I nod, feeling hollow, and he gives me an encouraging smile. The watches with sharp eyes, his arms folded over his chest, his face unreadable. The healer unwraps my hand, exposing the cut I received from the glass, which was nearly healed over by now. He used an alcohol pad to clean it, redressing it when it dried. "I don't think the hand wound will be an issue. It should heal over completely within the next few days. Doesn't look like it was done with silver or wolfsbane, so it shouldn't scar either," he smiled and I nodded. He took a vial of blood to test and excused himself from the room.

"How are you feeling?" Theren asked and grabs my hand. The same hand I used to comfort Fineian.

"Fine," I say blankly. "I don't think I was harmed."

His eyes narrow. "They didn't take you for no reason. Is your magic gone?" I drain the life from a nearby plant, holding my free hand with my palm facing up, forming a small black ball of magic.

"Good," he exhales in relief. "Are you sure you can't remember anything about your kidnapping?"

I shake my head and he sighs. "Nothing at all. What's the last thing you remember?"

I squint like I'm trying to recall. "I was sitting in the flower field. Everything went black and then when I woke up, I was outside of the territory. I kept walking and Olivar found me."

The listens intently to my story, which was technically all true, with the omission of a few minor details. Minor details I couldn't afford to tell. The Vine was right. They would rip apart all of his wolves if he knew.

"I'm so glad whoever took you returned you back to me," he said. He squeezed my hand, and I could see his eyes full of worry. "You've been gone for 3 days, but I promise you, Ona, I was looking for you. you the whole time."

"You don't look like you've slept a wink," I noted. His hair was disheveled, and his usually clean shaven face had the beginnings of a beard. What was most noticeable were the dark circles under his eyes, so deeply purple and puffy.

"You should go to sleep."

Theren shakes his head. "Not yet."

As if on cue, the healer comes back into the room. "Her blood tested negative for drugs and wolf's bane. Everything seems to be normal."

"Then why can't she remember?" The grinds his teeth together, his hands shaking.

Daily frowns. "I'm not sure. Unless someone has some kind of mind control or memory altering gift they used on her, she should be able to remember."

Theren nods. "That's a dangerous gift," he mutters. "And if that's how they're wiping your memory, there's a chance we'll never find out what happened."

I exhale in relief at that. and Theren must have seen it as a sign of anxiety because his hand tightens around mine. "Don't worry, little one. I won't give up until we catch whoever did this to you," he reassures me.

Daily excuses himself and shortly after there's a knock at the door. "Come in," the calls out, and two males and a female enter the room.

"Ona, these are the best trackers in Blue Moon."

"Trackers?" I question in fear.

The nods. "I smelled an unfamiliar wolf on you. No doubt the person who took you. If they get his scent, they'll be able to go back to where Olivar found you and track the wolf."

I nod numbly. "Please, please don't catch his scent," I silently prayed. Despite Fine and taking me, I didn't want him or his rogues caught. He wasn't a danger to anyone, just a poor soul who wanted to protect innocent rogues. And in that moment, I completely understood him.

The three wolves took turns sniffing me, focusing heavily on the hand and wrist that Finineian had touched. After they're finished, The asks, "Did you catch a strong enough scent?"

The female nods. "We did. We shouldn't have any issue tracking him."

I gasp slightly, and they all grin victoriously. "Let's leave before the scent gets cold."

They're in command and they nod. "You can't," I cry out and they look at me in shock.

"I mean, it's too dangerous."

"Don't worry, little one," Theren reassures me. "I'll take a few warriors with us. Don't doubt our strength. We're stronger than you know."

"That's what I'm afraid of."

I nod and Theren kisses my forehead before saying goodbye. Leon and Jackson arrive at Theren's orders to guard me. He and the trackers leave and Leon and Jackson walk me back to the pack house. As we walk to Theron's home, my eyes are fixated on the sunset.

Chapter 38.

"You're going to wear a hole into the carpet," Leon warns. And I momentarily stop my pacing.

"Shouldn't they be back by now?" I ask, as the sun had already begun to rise in Theren, and his trackers were still gone.

Leon looks at me in pity. "Don't worry, Onixa. They'll be fine. Whoever took you will be brought to justice. Do you remember anything yet?"

I shake my head, continuing to pace, completely useless. All I could do was hope that whatever Finineian had done to hide the cabin was still intact and Theren didn't discover it. I briefly wondered if I should feel guilty for hoping that my kidnapper would not be found. Was I betraying the pack, my mate? But it would be worse if Theren had known the truth behind why I was taken. If he knew that there was a group of rogues banding together, he would certainly view that as a threat to his pack. I didn't want to think about what he would do to Finine if he knew of his delusions.

My heart nearly pounded out of my chest as the front door opened and Theren stepped through, looking even more exhausted than the last time I had seen him. His eyes searched until they met mine, and he immediately stalked over, pulling me into a tight hug that nearly knocked the wind out of me.

"I'm sorry," he breathed. "You didn't find him?" I asked in surprise, pulling away.

He shook his head ruefully. "I'm not sure what happened. We had such a strong scent and we followed it north for a while until we reached a clearing. My breathing halted and the track went cold out of nowhere. It's possible it started raining in the area and washed away their scent."

"That's too bad," I murmur, trying to sound disappointed.

Leon walks over to Theren and they share a look, no doubt having a private conversation with their minds. "I'm going to help Jackson with training the juniors," Leon mutters, dismissing himself, but not before turning to me. "I'm sorry we failed you, Onixa," he whispered, his eyes shining in regret, and it sent pangs through my chest.

"He blames himself," therein says quietly once he leaves, "for not being there when he took you."

I shake my head in disbelief. "You don't believe that, do you? That Leon is to blame."

"Of course not," Theren says softly. "It's my fault for leaving you unguarded."

Nodding, I bring my hand up to his face, gently running my thumb over the dark circle under his eye. "You should get some rest."

Theren shakes his head, and his eyelashes flutter as he struggles to keep his eyes open. "I have too much to do today."

"You're leaving me alone?" I ask in a combination of surprise and disappointment.

Theren snorts. "Of course not. I'm not letting you out of my sight for a long time." He kisses my forehead. "I can work from my office. Join me."

Nodding, I accept the hand he extends as he guides us to his office where he collapses into the oversized chair. He uncaps a pen and begins to go through the stack of papers scattered on his desk. Bookshelves line the walls with thick embroidered spines of books neatly stacked.

"Have you read all of these?" I ask I run my hand along them. They feel cold.

"No," the admits not looking up from his papers. As my hand runs along the cool spines, it stops on one that feels warmer than the others. I remove the dark green book and read the title, which is written in elegant gold lettering, The Gifts and the Curses of the Moon. Taking a seat on the floor, I cross my legs and put the heavy book in my lap, flipping it open to the first page. I frown, noting that previous pages had been torn out. The first page starts mid-sentence, and for thousands of years, they argued over the gifts. The moon goddess believed all of her gifts were merciful blessings bestowed upon the wolves. But he disagreed. He could see how some gifts tormented the wolves and felt as though they were cursed for possessing them. Some had too much power, too much power for any mortal to possess, and it nearly drove them mad. But there was nothing he could do for the moon goddess knew that the gifts were necessary.

"Who is he?" I mutter to myself.

"H?" he asks, still engaged with his paperwork. "Nothing. Sorry." I apologize, continuing to skim through the pages, unable to find who the he referenced was. I read through more of the book, which detailed how gifts were mainly unique, except for a few gifts, such as healing or those with the sight. Some gifts were similar, such as those with elemental powers. Like Alpha Kynan, I thought to myself, who seemed to be able to control flames as well as induce them spontaneously completely. The book discusses how some people are gifted with the ability to partially control the elements, such as being able to control flames that already exist or only being able to manipulate already existing water. The highest degree by the moon goddess blesses those who can both create and manipulate the element. So Alpha Kynan was powerful partially because he was blessed by the moon goddess or perhaps he was already powerful because of his blessings. The gifts are bestowed as a reflection of the wolf. None is given randomly. The healers are caretakers, gentle and kind. So they are given a gift that allows them to help others. Alphas are typically endowed with powerful offensive gifts designed to aid them in battle. I nearly choked as I read the following line. Those with dark gifts are tainted, cursed by their rotten souls and hearts.

"No," I whisper. "That couldn't be true. I would never use my gift to harm. I wasn't a monster. I didn't have a rotten soul. Or did I? Was I truly destined to become the monster the moon goddess suspected?"

"None is given randomly." I reread. "Maybe I do have a dark heart. The gifts are bestowed as a reflection of the wolf. Do I have the same darkness that fuels my magic lurking deep in my bones, flowing through my blood?"

"You destroyed Kilmore's arm, nearly hurting him." My subconscious reminded me that was an accident. I was 6 years old and I didn't know what I was doing.

"You could have hurt Azizio with your magic." My vicious subconscious threw back. "You wanted to hurt her so badly. Your magic resurfaced. Your black magic is a reflection of your anger. It's a reflection of you."

Chapter 39.

I continued to pour over the book, but I found no more mention of whoever the he initially referenced was.

"Hey, Theren," I get off the floor. The book clutched tightly in my arms. "Do you mind if I borrow this book?"

His eyes are still focused on his paperwork, his eyebrows furrowed. "Of course not, Onixa. What's mine is yours," he says, waving his hand dismissively.

"Do you have a seer in your pack?" I ask quietly after a moment. I read about those gifted with sight in the book I held. Apparently, they had varying degrees of clairvoyance, intuition, and precognition.

That catches Theren's attention, he sighs, putting down the pen and looking at me skeptically through thick lashes. "We do. A very old, very senile one. But yes, she does have the sight," he says slowly. "Why do you ask?"

"Can I see her?" I ask quietly, hesitating to ask in fear of being told no.

Theren analyzes my face. "Why?"

I shrug. "I just have a few questions. Maybe she can help with the mystery," I add, though I don't plan on asking about who did it.

The snorts. "I doubt it. She's very old. Her mind is starting to slip. She only speaks in riddles or unclear statements. Talking to her is far more trouble than she's worth, and you're not likely to get any useful information."

"Can I just try?" I ask, my voice soft.

"Please," the considers, rubbing his jaw. "I don't see the harm in that. Would you mind if Leon took you? Or I could go with you tomorrow."

"Leon is fine," I say. Probably too quickly. He nods and his eyes glaze over momentarily as he mindlinks him. "He'll be here soon," Theren says, his attention going back to the papers.

I nod, mumbling a quick thanks as I leave his office, unsure why I feel anxious to meet the seer. In truth, I want to ask her about my darkness. If, as the book says, I will truly become as dark as my gift suggests. I want to ask her if it's possible to have two mates. While I mostly believed Finineian was merely delusional, I couldn't help the nagging feeling that there was more to the story. I mean, there had to be some reason why I felt sparks when our skin touched.

I went downstairs where Leon was already waiting. "You got here fast," I noted.

He nodded. "Theren said you wanted to go see Ethel."

"Hoping to learn your future, little wolf," he asks teasingly.

I give a forced laugh. "Something like that."

"You think she's crazy, too?"

Shrugging, he guides the way as we leave the house. "Not sure I believe in all that prophecy stuff. Seems a little far-fetched, but wolves are given the gift of sight," I point out. "Surely they do have some kind"

Of clairvoyance, some kind of otherworldly knowledge. Leon nodded slowly. I don't deny that they know things, things that are impossible to know. But sight is a cursed thing. Those gifted with it are always driven to madness. Far too young, he shudders. I wouldn't wish that gift on my worst enemy.

"You think her gift drove her to madness?" I asked in surprise, and he nodded.

"Why would a gift do that?" Leon mulled over. "It can't be easy," he said quietly. "Knowing what makes the fabric of the universe. Knowledge can be a curse too, Onixa."

"That much knowledge consumes them."

"Do you think other gifts can consume people?" I asked quietly.

His head snapped up, looking right through me. "You think your black magic will consume you?" he stated. "And it's not a question."

"Is that silly?" I asked. "I can feel the darkness deep, deep inside me. I know it can tear through me if I let it."

"It's something you should talk to your mate about," he said gently, giving me a knowing look. "We're here."

Windchimes lined along the balcony roof sing softly as a gentle breeze ruffles them. The yellow house is tiny, and exotic plants are potted haphazardly on nearly every inch of the ground, leaving only a thin trail of open ground leading to the bright red door.

"Do you want to go alone?" Leon asked quietly, his voice joining the soft breeze as one.

I nodded, taking a tentative step forward. And if it weren't insane, I would have thought that the plants shifted slightly away from me as I went down the path.

"It's the wind, Donixa. Don't be insane," I tell myself. But the flowers are growing away from the path when they used to topple over it nearly.

"I'll be right outside," Leon calls out. "Yell if you need me."

I take a deep breath, finally reaching the apple red door. I knock gently, and the door is immediately opened. A petite, white-haired lady answers with a grin.

"Onixa night, you're finally here," she says excitedly, and her soft, wrinkly hand grabs mine as she yanks me inside with a surprising amount of force. "I made banana bread and mint tea."

She pulls me into the overcrowded kitchen where she all but shoves me into a slight chair. I nearly moan at the smell of the treat.

"Those are my favorite," I whisper. "My Grahams always baked banana bread on Sundays and we ate it after tending to the garden, washing it down with mint tea."

She gives a sly grin. "I know."

I stare at her in amazement, and she gestures to the spread. "Please help yourself."

Her eyes are a pale gray, almost as white as her hair. I hesitantly take a slice, and she pours me a cup of tea from an antique pot with delicate flowers intricately painted along the bottom. She tilts her head to the side, her eyes gazing intensely into mine.

"You're surprised I seem to be in my right mind."

"I choke on the bread."

"I didn't think you were crazy," I quickly say.

"Oh, I am," she says with a small laugh. "Leonardo Arsen is correct in his assertion that my mind has begun to slip. I'm not nearly the same seer I was decades ago."

Taking a sip from the tea, my hands tremble slightly, unnerved by the woman sitting across from me.

"You're worried about your darkness," she says quietly, and my heart stops. "There are dark, dark forces at work within yourself."

"What do you mean?" I stammer out, and the wind chimes frantically bang against each other outside, no longer lightly twinkling. Pale eyes burn through me. "You have black magic coursing through your blood. But you already knew that. You're worried it will one day consume you."

"Will I sit?" I ask, my mouth dry, even though I finished my tea.

She shakes her head. "You're asking the wrong questions, Onixanite. Only you can decide if the darkness will overpower the light."

"Mates," I blurt out, desperate for her to stop looking at me with an intensity so fierce I fear I may pass out. "Is it possible to have two?"

"There is only one," she says slowly.

And I exhale in relief, though it is short-lived. "That will stop the darkness."

I clench my cup tightly. "That doesn't answer my question."

She laughs, and it's a warm sound that reminds me of my grandmother. "Some things even I do not know."

"Ona, what do you mean one will stop the darkness?" I ask quietly. "You said that the darkness will be my choice."

She reaches her hand out, clasping it in mine. "You are your other half, Onyx and Knight. Their darkness is as much theirs as it is yours. Choose growth," she advises.

Her hand suddenly squeezes mine tightly. "There is dust. Dust and the sun. The sun will always rise after the moon and the moon will always chase after it. Like a cat and mouse, they will never stop. Two tides pulling in opposite directions. The seams of the universe will split and she will stop the tides, but the earth will be wet with the blood of the white wolf. Death. Death. Death. Three deaths. One rebirth. Death. Death. Death. Three deaths, one rebirth."

She chants, her eyes glowing a bright white. I reach across the table, shaking her until she stops the chant, and she gasps deeply, her eyes returning to normal.

"My apologies, Onixa. I don't know what came over me." She apologizes, smiling as she pours more tea as if nothing happened.

"What was that?" I ask, my body trembling with fear and adrenaline.

"I feel power," she laughs, waving her hand. "It happens sometimes. As I said, my mind has devolved into madness." Ethel freezes. "You should go. Your mate is waiting for you."

I nod, too stunned to argue, to ask more questions. I'm not even sure I wanted to know the answers anymore. She practically shoves me out the door, but not before saying, "Gradon Clauss is the beginning."

"Wait," I say as I'm pushed on the other side of the doorway. "What does Gradon have to do with this?"

She shakes her head sadly. "He is the beginning." Ethel whispers and slams the door in my face.

Leon waits on the other side of the path, his arms crossed and eyebrows raised. I try not to notice that all of the flowers that once bloomed so brightly along the path have blackened.

Chapter 40.

"Well, I'm sorry that the visit to the seer was a disappointment," he said as we got into bed. "Can't say I'm surprised. She's been a little uh unwell even since my parents were in power."

I hadn't told him about what the seer said. I couldn't bring myself to tell him about the prophecy. The way her white eyes lit up as she told me about the three deaths. It would have been even more dangerous to mention that she had brought up Gradon's name. Tomorrow I will see him, try to get some information out of him if he even knows what she is talking about. But she had known. She had known about the banana bread, about the tea. She saw my darkness. Despite Theren and Lyon's warning, I had not a single doubt that the seer was in her right mind. And whatever cryptic things she said would come to fruition. It wasn't a matter of if, but when.

"There's something I want to talk to you about," Theren says, grabbing my hands in his, and my blood freezes. Did he know I was lying? I had been lying so much about Fineian and now about the seer, it was hard to keep track.

"Oh," I say, trying to sound casual.

"The mating gathering is in 3 days," he tells me. "Sorry, I forgot to bring it up sooner. It slipped my mind between the challenge and your..." His voice trailed off, "kidnapping."

"What's a mating gathering?" I asked, confused. I never heard the phrase before.

Theren frowns. "Oh, right. My apologies. I forgot that you haven't grown up in a pack and don't know about some of the traditions. Every year, unmated wolves of 18 years and older from every pack meet on a different territory each year. It's supposed to help mates find each other faster in case they belong to other packs."

"Do rogues go?" I asked nervously.

"No, the snares. Packs only." I can't help my face from falling, though I'm glad I will not be seeing Fineian. "That's sad. What about the wolves made it to rogues?"

The pack is quiet. "If you hadn't stumbled on me in the woods, we may never have met," I point it out. "Maybe sometime they'll let rogues go."

Theren obviously disagrees, but doesn't argue with me, knowing that rogue rights are a sensitive subject between us.

"There's something else about the mating gathering," he says slowly, tentatively, nervously. "We will need to be mated by then."

My blood pressure is still rising. "Um, like fully mated?" I choke out.

"Not if you don't want to," he says, but frowns as he says so. "Wolves will question why you aren't at least marked by me."

I squirm anxiously. "3 days," I slowly say. "That's not much time."

The pack leader's tone is somewhat annoyed. "It's been months since I found you, Onixa. Most alphas and lunis complete their mating within the day." My tone hardens. "Maybe if I didn't have to prepare for a month to beat someone half to death, our relationship could have progressed a little better."

Theren freezes. "Say what you really want to say, Onixa?" he purrs, his voice cold and cruel.

"I'm saying," I snap, equally frosty, "that it's your fault. I'm not ready. I'm not going to get marked by you just because you have some kind of deadline. That's not very romantic, now is it?"

"I won't force you," Theren says coldly, his words clipped. "But you will be marked come the mating gathering."

"Then get ready for the fight of your life," I say, my voice deadly calm. I drain the life from the plant on the side table, throwing a black ball of energy at the ceiling light, which shatters the bulb, leaving us in complete darkness. "Good night, mate," I whisper harshly and drift into a restful slumber.

"I don't know, Onixa. She sounds crazy." Gradon dismisses my story about the seer.

"She's not crazy," I frown. "Did you miss the part about the banana bread and mint tea?"

Gray's eyes soften, and I can barely see them in the dim prison lighting. "She reminds you of Grahams. You're letting that cloud your judgment."

"She knew your first and last name," I point out. "How would she know that?"

Gradon sighs, tapping his fingers on the bars that separate us. "I'm not doubting that she has the sight. I'm doubting her random blatherings. What does that even mean? The beginning of what?"

I rub my eyes. "I was hoping you could tell me," I mutter in disappointment.

"I hate to break it to you, Nyx. He laughs without humor, but I'm not the beginning of anything. I'm going to die in this cell. There isn't anything I can begin."

Frowning, I reach for his hand. It's cold, far too cold, and my stomach turns as it reminds me of a corpse. "Don't say that," I plead.

He raises an eyebrow. "Why not? What is there said about it?" I avert my gaze as I recall the outburst Theren had when I suggested it. He's thinking about it.

"I see," I muse as I lie. "You're a terrible liar."

Gray laughs. "It's fine, Onixa. I've already made my peace with it. I just wish they would kill me already so I can join my mate and pup in the afterlife."

My hand trembles in his much larger one. "You don't mean that," I whisper, tears threatening to overspill.

Gradon shakes his head, looking at me in pity. "Sympathy. This is no life to live, Onixa. Wolves are not meant to be kept in silver chains and a cage. Theren will never let me out, and I have no desire to continue to stay in here for another 60 or so years."

"He'll let you out eventually," I say, my voice small, unsure.

"Bloodlake will never forget," he says softly, closing his eyes. "They will declare war if they find out I've been released, no matter how many years go by. Theren is aware of this, and so am I. Make your peace with it, Nyx. I already have."

His face is hollowed, and he doesn't look like the same man I had known over the years. He was broken, completely, utterly shattered.

"I won't let you die in here," I whisper. "I'm going to get you out tomorrow."

His eyes snap open. "You can't. Theren won't let me out. Even if somehow you manage to let me go, it doesn't change anything. I have nowhere to go. Just let me die, Onixa," he pleads, his eyes begging me to end his suffering.

My voice lowers. "There's a group of rogues I met. You'll follow the North Star. They will take you in. They're a peaceful group of rogues. They harbor other rogues and offer them a safe space. You'll be happy there," I insist, and I know it to be true. Gray would find purpose in helping wolves just like him, like us.

His eyes narrow suspiciously. "And how do you plan on getting me out?"

I look around, making sure there are no guards around, which there aren't as Leon was standing outside. "I'll use my magic to break through. I know I can do it. I'll make sure you leave the territory safely. I can use my magic to temporarily subdue anyone we may cross."

For the first time since he's been imprisoned, I see a flash of hope cross his face. "Are you coming, too?"

I shake my head ruefully. "I can't. I have a mate, a life here. I can't leave it behind. But you," I squeeze his hand in reassurance, "have the chance for a new life, a new start."

He shakes his head in disbelief. "How will I know when I'm there?"

"You'll reach an empty clearing. There's a man there. Fine. Call out his name. Tell him I sent you. He'll take you in," I say, confident that Finineian would not turn away any rogue, much less one so important to me.

I hear the heavy doors swing open and Leon walks in. "Time's up, Onixa. We should be going. Dinner is in an hour."

I nod to him, squeezing Gray's hand once more. "Goodbye, Gray. I'll see you tomorrow," I tell him. The double meaning clear. This would work. It had to.

Chapter 41.

I was thankful that Theren kept his distance the rest of the day, no doubt, still angered by our fight the previous night. What did he expect? How else was I supposed to respond to an ultimatum about something as sensitive as mating? He just said it so casually. "We will be mated in three days time," as if I had no choice in the matter. The very memory of it made me angry enough to feel the darkness bubbling inside of me, threatening to spill over like a pot of boiling water. Maybe I was just a ticking time bomb. One wrong move and I would explode, destroying everything in my wake.

"No, no," I tell myself as I crawl into bed alone. "I am not the darkness inside of me." The book was wrong. The moon goddess had made a mistake, thinking the black magic was a reflection of me.

When I awake, I'm surprised that Theren is asleep next to me. He must have come while I was sleeping, as was the case with most nights, as he typically stayed up late working.

"Good morning, mate?" he says, his eyes fluttering open.

"Change your mind about the marking yet? Change your mind about releasing Gradon?" I ask sweetly, and he rolls his eyes.

He sighs as he tucks my hair behind my ears. "Only bad things will happen if he is released. Ona, I promise you that."

I shrug. "We'll see about that, mate."

Theren's promise not to let me out of his sight after my kidnapping was short-lived, as expected. He spent most of the day hidden away in his office, which was fine with me. I spent part of the day with Gradon in the prison to keep up appearances. It would have been suspicious if I hadn't visited him like I did every day, and I wanted to keep the illusion that everything was normal. I went to the field of flowers, which this time Theren ordered Leon and Jackson to accompany me, which was to be expected after the last time I was left alone. They paced, bored, as I calmly continued reading the book about gifts. I finished the section on the biological aspects of gifts and learned that some had a hereditary component. For example, healers and seers would typically have other healers and seers in their bloodline. I worried that my gift would be hereditary, that someday my children would struggle with the darkness, obliterating everything in their path. But most of the gifts would skip generations, ensuring that no two wolves, with some exceptions, would have the same powers at the same time. I wondered who in my lineage had been afflicted with the darkness and if they let it consume them or if they chose growth as the seer said, whatever the hell that meant.

After dinner, I excused myself to bed early, claiming I felt exhausted. Nobody batted an eye. Not that they really ever seemed to notice or care if I was around or not. I put on black clothing and snuck out of the pack house, hoping that Theren wouldn't come to bed until late as he usually did. The longer it took him to notice I was gone, the better. Quietly and sneakily, I walked to the prison, avoiding anyone walking near my path. It felt like my senses had been reborn, and I felt optimistic about Gradon's escape. When I arrived at the prison, a guard was stationed at the door.

"Ona," he said in surprise. "I recognized him from some of my visits. Theren didn't mention you were visiting the rogue tonight."

I gave him an apologetic smile, draining the life from the grass underneath me. And before he realized what was going on, I used my magic to knock him unconscious, something I had practiced on myself earlier in the day, siphoning energy from all of the nearby grass and trees. I walked inside the prison, feeling the magic burning through me like electricity. I felt alive. It had been a long time since I took that much life, but I knew I would need all of my strength to break Gray's chains, especially when considering they were made of silver and lined with wolf's bane to make sure he couldn't use his gift. A smart move on Theren's part because the escape would have been much easier if Gray could turn invisible. I ran into the jail, knocking out another guard whom I came across, apologizing as I did so. Gray was standing, pacing in his cell when I got there. I could tell he hadn't slept the night before, too restless about his impending escape. I used part of the energy to shatter the bars entirely, and I was surprised by how effortless it was. I was more powerful than I, or anyone for that matter, gave me credit for. I merely hadn't tapped into that strength before. Doing the same to his chains, I grab Gray by the wrist.

"We need to hurry," I say as he nods. "It won't be long until Theren notices I'm gone or someone finds the guard I knocked out outside."

We sprint out of the jail, and I can tell that the wolf's bane and silver have weakened him. He's not nearly as fast as he once was. We're almost to the edge of the territory, and I made sure we didn't exit through a heavily guarded area. So, imagine my surprise when I see a figure leaning casually against a tree. A white ball of magic formed in his palm just as he had looked the day we met.

When I saw him in the forest. "Come here often?" he had said, "You know," he says lazily, meeting my horrified eyes, "I keep cameras in all of the cells. Cameras with a microphone, might I add."

"No," I whisper, stepping in front of Gray. "Don't do this, Theren," I warn.

His grin is cruel, sadistic. "Don't do what? Don't let you release my prisoner. How dare I?" he says sarcastically, tossing the ball of magic into his other hand, which he catches effortlessly.

I drain the life from a tree, replenishing my black magic. I form a ball of my own, holding it out in front of me. "I don't want to knock you out, but I will," I say, unable to stop my voice from trembling slightly.

My words make Theren's grin widen. "You have no idea how to wield the magic you possess, little one," he snarls, and I flinch at the harshness in his tone. "You may have dark forces on your side, but you lack experience."

I don't give him the chance to attack first. I throw the photon ball at him, which he deflects, throwing his own at me, but I duck, shoving Gradon out of the way, who crumpled to the ground. Too much wolf's bane in him to stand upright, draining the life from the grass beneath his feet. I use the energy to create tendrils of black smoke that wrap around his feet. White mist surrounds his hands, and he forms them into shards, sending them into my magic, breaking it easily. He forms more balls, throwing them at me one after another, and I can only dodge so many until one hits me in the stomach, and I can feel nearly all of my ribs break. Not even in my training with Arriio had I withstood such a brutal injury, and I fall to my knees, unable to catch my breath as I feel his magical mist enter my body through my mouth and nose, paralyzing me. I'm helpless as he leans over Gradon, grabbing him roughly by the tattered shirt.

"Please," I beg through gasps. "Don't do this, Theren. I'll let you mark me, anything you want. Just don't do this."

His face is blank as he shoves his hand through Gray's chest, twisting as he grabs his heart and throws it to the side, as Arriio had done to Brenda. I scream.

"You know why you can't control your magic, Onixa?" he asks coldly as he lets Gray's lifeless, limp body crumple to the floor. "You fight the darkness instead of using it."

And that's when I explode. Darkness shatters whatever magic he put in me to paralyze me. Every tree, every plant within a 5m radius dies instantly, and black magic crackles around me like a fire that cannot be put out. It swirls around my arms, around my legs, even seeping out of my eyes to relieve my body from the raw power I now possess. I threw all of it at my mate. The magic flies through the air, crumpling into an awkward pile after hitting a tree which breaks in half. I float to him instantly, the darkness carrying me. Theren is unconscious.

"You destroyed the last of the light in my life," I say numbly to his sleeping, oblivious body. I go to Gradon. Bloody, broken Gradon, the last of the light, the beginning. I close his eyelids gently, saying a prayer as I do so, hoping he is at peace with his mate and child. No tears fall from my eyes. The darkness won't allow it. Gradon was the beginning. The beginning of the darkness. I followed the North Star.

Chapter 42.

I stumbled through the woods. The darkness wrapped around me like a cloak, the North Star and the moon lighting the way. I don't run into any rogues, for which I am thankful, as I'm unsure of my mental stability and wouldn't put it past the darkness to obliterate anything in my path. Images of Gray flash through my mind against my will, no matter how hard I try to block them out. Gray, standing in my kitchen the day after we met, after I told him to leave me alone. Gray, looking half decomposed in the jail cell, his skin tone matching his name. Gray putting his hand over my eyes during the scary parts of movies because he knew I didn't like seeing blood. Gray lying crumpled on the floor of the woods, covered in blood. His eyes were a blank slate. The night is cold. The wind cuts through me like a knife, and the darkness does nothing to warm me as cold water droplets begin to assault my skin. I deserve the cold. After hours of walking in the pouring rain with harsh winds freezing the water in my hair solid, I finally reached the edge of the clearing and I crumpled to the ground, whatever edge the darkness had given me long gone as the emptiness consumed me.

"Finine," I whisper, my throat dry and voice coarse. "Fine." Curling into a ball, stray tears freeze on my face, forming icicles around my eyes that I don't bother to wipe away.

"Onixa," I hear him yell, and he sounds far away. Warm hands grab my face, but all I can see is the darkness. He picks me up, holding me close to his warm body, but it's not enough to stop my body from racking with shivers. He's sprinting, and I hear muffled sounds as he runs upstairs. People are talking to him, but he ignores them, and I can't make out what anyone is saying.

"Gradon is gone."

I hear water running, and I'm still in his arms. "Onixa, Onixa, can you tell me what happened?" he desperately asks, but I'm too retreated into my mind, separate from the physical world. I can faintly feel his warm hands wiping away the ice on my eyes and hear him pleading for me to say something, anything. His body was still warm when I closed his eyelids. Did anyone hear the prayer?

Fine's warmth is replaced by soft, feminine hands that strip the clothes that are frozen solid off my body. The warmth returns as the gentle hands submerge me in water so scalding against my icy skin that it feels like I'm being burnt alive. I thrash, sending water flying out of the tub. But the hands restrain me, keeping me in the water that does nothing to melt the ice around my heart. It should have been me. My body is shaking with sobs, and I can hear someone wailing, a primal, heartbroken sound. The hands dump water over my head, and a soft feminine voice tries to soothe me. Once the water is lukewarm, I can feel myself being lifted from the tub and I begin to feel my body again. There's excruciating pain in my chest, and I remember the magic crushing my rib cage. Theren. I should have stopped him when I had the chance. His eyes were cruel, calculating as he hurt. He had done it because he knew how much it would hurt me, my punishment.

When the hands are replaced with silk sheets, I immediately lean over the side of the bed and vomit. A different set of hands holds my hair back as everything is expelled from my body. The hurling sending even more pain through my ribs. I taste blood and hear someone yelling for a healer. I scream when I smell someone unfamiliar's hands that try to inspect my stomach.

"Onixa, stop," I hear Finnian plead, and for a moment I freeze. But when I feel the foreign hands, I start screaming and thrashing. They must have been told to back off because the hands don't try touching me again. Someone is still wailing, but I am still somehow able to fall asleep, and I awaken after I have only dreamed of a broken heart. I'm not sure how many times I woke up after the bloody heart to throw up each time with large hands rubbing my back softly and holding my hair back. The cycle goes on. I don't know for how long, but I only see darkness for long enough that the next time my eyes open, I can see clearly again.

Fine is pacing, his green eyes snapping up when he realizes I'm awake. His hair is messy, his eyes bloodshot, and dark circles encircle them.

"Onixa," he says in relief, and he's immediately at my side, kneeling next to the bed as he clutches my cold hand. I wonder how cold Gradon's body is. Will anyone bury him? The thought fills me with nausea, but I'm unable to throw anything up as I dry heave. Only blood is coughed up onto the clean floor. The vomit from the previous night gone.

"All of your ribs are broken," Finine says softly as his hand gently rubs circles on my back. "You need to let the healer help you."

I shake my head, thrashing in his arms that try to restrain me. "I don't want to see the healer. I want to feel the pain. The only reminder I have left that it wasn't a nightmare."

"Okay. Okay," Fine acquiesces, desperate to stop my body from shaking and fighting him. "Can you tell me what happened to you, Ona?"

"He's gone," I whisper in agony, tears streaming down my face. "He killed him."

"Who's gone? Onixa?" Fine asks softly, like I'm glass and he's scared of shattering me.

"He killed him," I repeat in horror. And Fineian's eyes are green just like Theren's. I shove him away, sending a searing pain through my chest. "Get away from me," I cry, and all I can see when I look at him is Theren. "You fight the darkness," he had said, his hands covered in blood.

"Onixa," he says, his face filled with confusion. His arms held up in a non-threatening manner. "You're safe. I won't hurt you."

"You lack experience." He already knew he was going to hurt Gradon, and there was nothing I could do about it.

"Get out," I say, my voice raspy. "His eyes are green."

"Ona, I just want to help you," he pleads. Green eyes. The small tree in the side of the room dies, and the darkness swirls around me as I scream, "You killed him! Get away from me!" And my screams turn to sobs. The leaves and I throw my magic at the window, sending shards of glass flying, and I'm thankful when one of them pierces my cheek, the blood pouring down the side of my face. Gradon is gone. Nothing else matters.

Chapter 43.

The next few days pass by an agonizing slowness. For the first day, I stood by the window, watching the sun rise and set as wolves came and left the house throughout the day. Some of them looked curiously up at me, but quickly looked away like they had orders to leave me alone. After the first day, when Finineian came in and saw me standing on the shattered glass by the window, he cleaned the glass, brought in a chair, and placed it facing the window. He brought me food throughout the days, none of which I touched. The idea of eating making me nauseated. He begged for me to eat something, anything, but I ignored him. His sister, Kalia, came into the room a few times, no doubt sent by Finineian to try to get me to eat something, to say something. I ignored her, too. Even one of the rogues, Dean, the twin with the scar, came in with a glass of water and threatened to pour it down my throat if I didn't drink it myself.

"You know how many girls would kill to have me threatening them?" he boasted, and it was the first time I cracked a smile since Gray's death. I drank the water, and he sat on the floor next to me for a while, telling me about the hottest girls in the house and which ones he had successfully impressed. He reminded me of Gwen, and I was thankful for the distraction that he was the only one who didn't seem interested in what happened to me or at least was smart enough not to ask.

On the seventh day since Gray's death, I woke up in the chair just as the sun began to rise. A blanket wrapped around my shoulders and another on my legs that wasn't there when I went to sleep. A soft knock rapped on the door, and I didn't take my eyes off the sunset.

"I brought you breakfast and tea," Fineian said softly from behind me. I ignored him, not turning away from the window. The morning air was crisp and cool.

"You have to eat, Onixa," he pleaded. "Just one bite and I'll leave you alone."

"Not hungry," I say, my voice raspy.

He sighs and turns the chair away from the window, making me scowl. "I'm taking you back to Blue Moon."

Dread fills me. "No," I shout in horror. "I won't go back there."

"You're dying, Ona," he shouts back, making me flinch. He hadn't ever raised his voice at me before. "You haven't eaten in a week. You're wasting away right in front of me." He grabs my wrist, holding it up for me to see. Skin is pulled tight, barely covering the bone, and I avert my gaze. "I don't care if it takes you going back to Theren for you to be healthy again, but I won't let you sit here and waste away," he threatens.

"Don't say that name to me ever again," I hiss, yanking my wrist out of his grasp.

His eyes soften. "What happened, Onixa? Please, just tell me and I'll help you."

I laugh humorlessly. "You can't help. He's already gone."

Fine's face contorts in confusion. "Theren isn't gone."

"No, I'm not that lucky," I say bitterly, wrapping the blanket tighter around me, his eyes darken. "What did he do?" he snarls, his hands shaking in anger.

"He killed him," I say, my voice trembling. "He killed who, Onixa?"

"Gradon," I whisper. "He killed Gray."

His hand clasps mine. "Who's Gray?" he asks, his voice soft.

I swallow thickly. "He was my best friend." His gaze softens as he looks at me in sympathy. "I'm so sorry, Ona."

I get up, turning the chair back to the window, and Finineian sits on the floor next to me. "Do you want to talk about it?" he asks gently.

"No, you can't just stay locked in here forever. What's the problem, Finineian?" I asked Dr. My voice dripping in sarcasm. "I thought this is what you wanted. A prisoner."

He sighs. "I just want you to eat something and see a healer. Hurting yourself won't bring him back."

I ignore him, staring at the orange sky.

"Why did you wake me up so early?" Gray grumbled, still wearing his pajamas.

I grinned, crawling through my window and onto the roof with a blanket in my hands. "Come on," I say excitedly, waving him to follow me. He barely fits through the small window, cursing the day I was born as he does so. I lay down the blanket, sitting down and stretching my legs out, and Gradon does the same. The sun had just begun to rise, and the sky was a flurry of orange, pink, and yellow.

"Look how pretty it is," I smile at the sky.

"Very pretty," he agrees. But when I turn to look at him, his gaze is focused intensely on me.

"Onixa?" Finineian's voice snaps me out of my memory.

"Huh," I mumbled distractedly.

"I told you that if you don't eat voluntarily, a healer will come to sedate you and put in IV drip," Fineian says, his eyes pleading to cooperate. I glare at him and accept the plate he holds out.

"Good girl," he says in approval as I take a bite, though the fruit tastes like ashes in my mouth. He hands me a cup of tea, and I take a few sips even though it has grown cold.

"More," he orders, looking pointedly at the food. I roll my eyes, taking another bite. "If you finish half of it, we can take a walk through the gardens," he bargains, and I perk up slightly.

"Gardens?" I ask, and he nods, smiling slightly. "Ronin has quite the affinity for gardening. He loves those plants more than anything," he laughs.

I take a few more bites, but I feel sick from eating after my stomach was empty for so long. Fine seems to understand because he takes the plate and doesn't badger me to eat more.

"Get dressed and we'll go."

"Okay," Finine says softly, tucking a strand of hair behind my ear before he leaves the room. I get out of the chair, wincing slightly as the movement hurts my ribs. I could have used my magic to heal them, but the pain is a welcome feeling, my punishment. Throwing on the first articles of clothing I see in the closet, I go into the bathroom and stare at the mirror. I hold a hand up, making sure my reflection is really me. I don't recognize myself. My cheekbones jut out sharply, my face hollowed. My eyes, which are usually a bright blue, appear pale and lifeless. Even my collar bones protrude from my chest, and I can see what Fineian meant. I looked like a corpse. Breathing in deeply, I try to shove the image of Gray's dead body out of my mind. I go back into the closet, finding an oversized hoodie, which based on the smell, belonged to Finine. I pulled it over me, drowning in it, but desperate to hide my emaciated body.

"You fight the darkness instead of using it."

"Stop," I say aloud, rubbing my temples. "I want it all to stop."

"Onixa?" Fine calls out from behind the door. "Are you okay in there?"

I don't answer and go to the door. Stepping through where Finineian is waiting. I don't argue when he takes my hand in his and he starts guiding us through the maze of hallways. We pass by a few wolves who greet Fineian and look at me with interest but say nothing, and my eyes are trained on the floor.

"Well, well, well," I hear a familiar voice say. "The prettiest princess in the castle decides to join us peasants."

"Shut up, Dean," Fine says annoyed. But I smile faintly at the scarred male.

"Worried I'll steal your girl, Finley?" he jests, his eyes alight with mischief, but soften as they rest on me. "You look good, Onixa. It's nice to see you out and about. I mean it." He's obviously lying since I look a day away from death, but I nod anyway.

"Leave us alone, Dean," Fine tells him, rolling his eyes. "We're going to the garden."

"You know you're banned from there." Dean scoffs, crossing his arms. "You set one fire accidentally, mind you, and suddenly you're public enemy number one." I giggle slightly, and they look at me in surprise.

"Uh, well, take it up with Ronin. My hands are tied here," Finineian says after the shock wears off.

"You bet your ass I will," Dean promises. "I'll see you around, Donixa," he says with a wink. Yep, definitely a male Gwendalin.

We go outside through a side exit, and I'm thankful that the gardens are empty with no one in sight. Bright exotic plants go on for what seems like miles, and I'm surprised that I hadn't seen them before in the clearing. We walk through the gardens, my hand still in Finine's. I stop at a patch of colorful orchids. Hard to take care of, and I'm impressed by Ronin for growing them so beautifully.

"Are they your favorite?" Fine asks softly as we look at the flowers.

I shake my head. "Not mine. They were my grandmother's. Proof of the moon goddess, she would say." He smiles at that.

"What is your favorite flower then?"

"Poppies," I tell him, and think of all of the times Lou had grown them for me when I felt down. I suddenly wished he were here. He would know what to do, what to say. And the moon goddess knows I could use a friend in this eternal darkness.

Chapter 44.

Finineian and I continued to walk the gardens for a while, and I evaded most of the conversation he tried to make. I didn't feel comfortable with him, and I wasn't ready to open up, especially when he asked about that night. When we got to a garden of red roses, my vision turned murky, and all I could see was a red haze. The flowers turned into blood, and I saw Gradon's heart ripped from his body. I couldn't help throwing up everything I had eaten for breakfast all over the roses. Finine held my hair back immediately as I hunched over, expelling everything from my stomach. Soon, my heaving turned to coughing.

"Sorry," I muttered, and Finineian held out a handkerchief for me to wipe with. I had a fleeting thought that he expected it and was prepared.

"Don't apologize." Fine looked at me with sympathy, his hand reaching for my face, and I flinched. He withdrew his hand. "Although Ronin may not be as forgiving as I," Fineian changed the subject quickly with an apologetic smile. "He's quite protective over his garden. Dean learned that the hard way. It's how he got the scar on his face." I fought back a smile. I had assumed Dean got the scar in a dangerous battle, not because he ruined someone's flowers.

"We can go back inside if you want. Kalia is worried. Wants to see you," he says softly.

I cringe. I was in no condition to be talking to other people. I couldn't even look at flowers without projectile vomiting.

"Or not," he quickly says, "I can tell her to give you space for a while." Nodding, I exhale in relief. I could only imagine how disappointed Gray would be in me if he saw what I had been reduced to, a shell of a person. But it didn't matter because he wasn't here, and I wouldn't ever get to hear his sarcastic, teasing comments ever again.

"Would you like to watch a movie or something?" Finineian suggested. "I could clear everyone out of the movie room and we could watch something."

I nod. Fine guides us back inside the house, and I continued to be amazed by the size. I couldn't believe he had built it himself. The interior was cozy with flowers on every table and vibrant rugs scattered haphazardly. It was so different from the Blue Moon pack house, which was cold, silver, and everything immaculately placed. We go to a dimly lit room with a giant television screen and oversized recliners. There was even a popcorn machine in the corner. Fine gestured to the recliners. "Sit in whichever one you prefer. I'll leave once I put something on for you."

I nod, and he turns on the screen and uses a remote. "We have all of the streaming services. Is there something in particular you want to watch?"

"New girl," I say quietly.

"What?" Fine looks confused.

"That's what I want to watch," I clarify, and Finineian looks relieved. Maybe because I talked, perhaps because he thought I would never repeat anything. "It's on Netflix." He uses the remote to go to the Netflix app and searches for it.

"Do you have a specific episode in mind or should I just play it from the beginning?"

"The beginning," I answer. I had already seen every episode a million times, but it was a small comfort from my old life.

"Gray," I whisper, stepping into his room. He is immediately alert, almost jumping out of bed.

"Ona, are you okay?"

I look down. "I can't sleep."

Gray sighs, looking at his alarm clock. "It's 2:00 a.m., Nyx."

"Sorry," I apologize, and I'm ready to turn away when he speaks again. "Wait," he calls out. "I'll meet you in the living room in a few minutes."

I can't help but smile as I go to the living room, making a quick stop in the kitchen for ice cream and two spoons. Plopping down on the couch, I turn on the television and put on my favorite show. A few minutes later, Gray emerges from his room wearing only a pair of plaid pajama pants. He sits down next to me, putting a thick yellow blanket over my legs. He takes the ice cream from my hands, eating a spoonful for himself. He groans as he looks at the television. "New girl again? Don't you ever get sick of the show?"

Grinning, I answer, "Nope."

He sighs. "You're lucky I love you, Onixa."

I hear Finineian's voice say, "Sorry, I apologize mechanically."

"What did you say?" His voice is hesitant. I wonder if he knew why I kept zoning out. He always had to say my name a few times to snap me back into reality. Lately, my mind has been constantly replaying old memories with Gray. I wondered if, like New Girl, it was a comfort thing for me.

"I just asked if I could get you something to drink. Maybe something to eat if you're up for it," he offered, and I could tell he wanted me to say yes.

"Okay," I agree. And he asks what I like to eat. "I'm not picky." He's about to leave when I remembered to tell him that I'm a vegetarian.

"Of course you are," he said as he exhaled, but it didn't seem like it was an annoyance, but rather like he should have already known that, or maybe that he had already expected it.

"Vine leaves," and I stare at the screen, still on the homepage. I hesitate. What am I waiting for? Surely I can manage to turn on a show for myself. It had been so long since I had independence that I nearly felt handicapped. I get up and grab the remote, and suddenly I see someone in the corner of my eye. I jump, startled. I exhale when I realize that it's just Finian holding a cup and a small plate with fruit, crackers, and cheese.

"Sorry," I apologize. "It's just it was on the home screen and I wanted to turn it on so I just got up to get the remote and stop."

Fine says quietly. He looks heartbroken as he sets a plate down on a side table next to my seat. "Please, Onixa. You have absolutely nothing to apologize for. You don't have to justify everything you do to me ever."

I nod, and he takes the remote from my hand and turns it on for me. He turns around and starts heading for the door.

"Wait," I say before I can stop myself. "You can stay."

for a while. I mean, if you want. Obviously, you don't have to do anything you don't want to, but just in case if you felt pressured or had other things to do or he cuts me off with a laugh.

I see you suffer from the same word vomit affliction I do. I smile slightly at that, remembering how one of the first things I thought about him was goddess. This kidnapper certainly talks a lot. Do you mind if I sit in the seat next to you? he asks hesitantly, nervously. I shake my head.

We watch New Girl for a while and I eat some of the food and drink the water. I can see Finn and Sneak looks at me when he thinks I'm not looking. Maybe he's worried I'll throw up and ruin his carpet. When the first episode is finished, Fineian asks, "So, when do the angry guy in the flannel shirts and the girl with bangs and weird dresses get together?" I nearly took on my water. You've seen this before. I accuse him. He laughs. It's obvious. They try too hard to make it seem like they hate each other. They do hate each other. I insist. Well, at first at least. It's a slow burn romance. Enemies to lovers. It's only like the best kind of love story. He raises his eyebrows and opens his mouth to say something, but shuts it immediately.

We continue to watch the show, and it still works like a security blanket for me. I immediately fell back into the comfort of the familiar show. So comfortable, in fact, I dozed off at some point. I woke up, blinking my eyes as I tried to remember where I was. Right. Fine and new girl. Only Finian wasn't anywhere around. For some reason, I panicked. Had the killed him, too? Stretching my legs, I got up, leaving the television room. Hearing people talking and laughing, I followed the noise. Finineian, Calia, Dean, and the other wolves I met were sitting at the table eating a meal. As soon as I walked in, their heads snapped up to look at me. They looked at Fineian like they wanted to make sure it was okay to say something. I'm sure he told them to stay away.

"Onixa?" Fine smiles. "I didn't want to wake you up, but you're more than welcome to join us for dinner." I'm about to decline when Kalia says, "I made pasta. I'll be really hurt if you don't at least try it." "She's very sensitive," Dean warns, and Kalia throws a dinner roll at him, hitting him in the face. Dean grabs one of his own, winding his arm up, ready to launch it at her. "Dean, Calia, please," Fine size. "You're not exactly making dinner with us look pleasant." I gulp, suppressing memories of the food fights great on and I used to have. The day Theren took me, we were throwing Doritos at each other. He even crumbled one on my head. "Don't start something you can't finish, babe," he had said.

"Onixa," Finineian said softly, like he always did when he was trying to pull me out of my subconscious. So much for suppressing my memories. The wolves at the table looked at me with pity, even the scary looking girl with dark hair. I wondered if Fineian had warned them about my condition. I fought the bow rising in my throat as I swallowed nervously. "Pasta sounds good," I say quietly, my volume barely louder than a whisper. Fine immediately jumps out of his seat and moves a chair next to him, which I take a seat in. I look down at my hands as he fixes me a small plate. There's an awkward silence as I take a bite of the pasta, but everything still tastes like sod in my mouth.

"Do you like it?" Kalia asks hopefully. "Cal, give her a moment to breathe, would you?" The twin without the scar, Ronin, softly reprimands her. "Yeah, plus it's not like she's going to tell you your cooking sucks when she barely knows you," Dean adds. Calia glares at him. "My cooking does not suck. Thank you very much." Dean shrugs. "Guess you'll never know if she thinks that or not." "It's good," I interject quietly. "Thank you." Calia smiles. "Told you, dickhead." Fine gives her a pointed look and she amends her statement. "Sorry, Dean."

"They're so easily confused. No one would blame you if you ever mixed up the two, Onixa." The corner of my mouth curls up into a half smile. "I'll keep that in mind." Vinnie invisibly relaxes, though I hadn't noticed before that he was tense. Perhaps he always assumed I was constantly on the verge of a mental breakdown, which, in his defense, I had been since we first met. The wolves continue their conversation, which was interrupted by a previous argument about whether they should paint the walls or not. I learned a lot about them from the argument. Kalia and Dean were the major players, always on opposite sides, and I wasn't sure if it was because they genuinely had conflicting beliefs or if they just wanted to disagree with whatever the other person said. Finian would step in when it got too heated, dissolving the tension. Ronin didn't say much of anything at all, but would laugh when Calia would make a personal dig at his twin. Astra and Willis, the mates, seemed to be having their own separate conversations entirely in their minds based on their glossy eyes, which were constantly focused on each other. The way they looked at each other sent pangs through my heart. I always thought that's what it would be like when I found my mate. Constantly focused on each other, looking at the other person like they're all you see. Instead, my mate killed my best friend. Tore his heart out of his body without hesitation, tossing it to the side like it meant nothing.

"You fight the darkness instead of using it." The glass cup I was holding slipped out of my hand, shattering as it collided with the table, sending glass and water flying. It seemed like I took most of the glass, shards embedded in my forearm. Blood trickled out of the wounds, and I gagged. "You fight the darkness instead of using it." Fine swore under his breath, picking me up with inhuman speed and carrying me into the kitchen, putting me down in front of a trash can, which I threw up into until visions of a dead Gradon stopped assaulting my mind. Fine held my hair back, rubbing circles on my back like he had done the night I returned. When I finished, I looked at the wolves sitting at the table. I expected them to be disgusted, but they just looked at me in pity. "I'm so sorry," I whisper tearfully and quickly leave the room, blood still pouring out of my arm.

"Ona, wait," Fine calls after me, but I don't stop, ashamed of my weakness. "Told you your food sucks," I hear Dean whisper.

Chapter 45.

Throwing myself face first on the bed, I can't help the tears that flow freely from my eyes. At this point, I'm not sure if it's from Gradon's death, the glass stuck in my arm, my broken ribs, or a combination of all three. Probably the latter. A soft knock hits my door, which I ignore. The last thing I want right now is Fineian cuddling me, telling me it will all be okay. It will never be okay again. The knocking persists. "Go away, Fineian," I say through sobs. "It's me," a voice says gently. "Ronin." My tears stop abruptly from my confusion. I get out of bed, ignoring the pain shooting through my chest and arm. I open the door and Ronin is standing holding up a medical bag. "Do you mind if I take a look at your arm? I'm a healer," he says quietly, shyly. I shake my head, opening the door. I sit in the chair by the window I shattered, and Ronin takes the second chair that Fineian would sit in. Ronin holds my wrist gently, looking at my bloody arm. He opens the bag and pulls out a pair of tweezers. "This may hurt a little bit," he apologizes. He uses the tweezers to remove the chunks of glass and I wince slightly.

"No one is mad at you, you know," he says quietly. "They understand this situation." I swallow. "Did Fineian tell you all about?" I can't bring myself to say it out loud. He hesitates, pulling out another piece of glass. "Not the details, just the gist," he reassures me. "We were there when he found you outside." I flinch. I barely remembered that night. The darkness had nearly completely taken over. His voice is shaky as he says, "I thought you were gone when I first saw you in Fineian's arms. Your skin was blue."

"Later that night, Fineian asked me to take a look at your ribs. He thought they may have been broken, but when I tried to heal them, you started screaming and punched me in the face while you were thrashing." He laughed slightly. "Sorry, I went." "I I don't really remember that night." "Well," he shrugs. "Like I said, no one blames you for anything." Guilt reverberates through me. I had much to be blamed for. Starting with Gradon's death. "Maybe you should," I mutter. Ronin takes an alcohol pad and rubs it on my arm, wiping up the blood in the process and apologizing when I flinch. "You shouldn't blame yourself," Ronin says quietly after a moment. "I've been down that path. You can't save everybody."

"Ona," Ronin hovers his hand over my arm, and I can feel it tingle as skin patches over the cuts. He was a full-fledged healer, a rarity among wolves. Many had an affinity for bandaging and knew which herbs to use, but very rarely could they use their gift to heal wounds quickly. Grahams was a healer, too, and I was used to the strange sensation. "I should take a look at your ribs, too," Ronin insists. I shake my head. "They're fine." A lie. Ronin raises an eyebrow. "You heal at the rate of a normal wolf. I saw how destroyed they were that night. It looked like your chest was collapsing in on itself. I can't imagine what could cause that much force." His voice trails off. "I know what you're doing." "I don't know what you're talking about," I deny it. He looks at me, sympathy present in his gaze. "You're punishing yourself for that night. You think you'll feel better if you repent through pain, but you're wrong."

I can't help breaking down. All I do these days is cry. I don't know how to get over this. I sob and Ronin wraps his arms around me. I stain his shirt with my tears. I pull away when I'm calmed down. "Time," he says softly. "I know it's cliche. The whole time heals all wounds, saying, but it's true. Every day will get a little bit better. It'll always hurt you, but one day you'll realize that the pain isn't debilitating anymore like it used to be." He hands me a tissue to blow my nose into. "You've lost someone close to you," I observe. He gives a sad smile and he gets a far away look on his face for a moment. "That's how I know it won't last forever. No matter how hard it is, you just have to keep it moving. Getting out of bed every day, even when you just want to waste away. Seek comfort in those around you," he advises, and I look down.

As if guessing my thoughts, he says gently. "We are here for you. Onixa. Kalia asked Fineian about you every day you were in here. Dean fought Fine and Tooth and Nailed to let him come in because he thought he might cheer you up." I smiled slightly, but he continues speaking. "Willis Astra and I kept our distance because truthfully we were scared of upsetting you more. But we fixed up a makeshift home theater for you because Fineian said you like movies. We thought you might want somewhere to go for a distraction once you felt up to it." My mouth drops open, completely shocked and touched by the sentiment. "But why? You all don't even know me." He smiles kindly and squeezes my hand. "Because you're Finian's mate," he says, and I went. "That again, but more importantly, because you're one of us. Not just because you're a rogue at heart, but because you're driven by your desire to help others." Words completely escape me and I suddenly can't remember a single word in the English language or any other language for that matter.

"So, how about you take the first step towards healing and let me fix your ribs." Ronin leaves after healing my crushed rib cage and I'm thankful he didn't ask how it happened. Some things are just too painful to say out loud. I take a shower and get dressed in pajama pants and another one of Fineian's hoodies. The other one somewhere in the home theater. The home theater they made for me. I couldn't believe that people I didn't even know would try so hard to make me happy, that they immediately accepted me for who I am. The feeling was foreign, unfamiliar. There was another knock at the door and I told them they could come in. It was Fineian.

"Hey," he said sitting on the corner of the bed. "How are you feeling?" "Ronin said he healed the cuts and breaks." I nod. "He's very kind to me, unjustly so, in a way I didn't deserve." I don't answer his question regarding how I am because the answer is depressing and obvious. "You sound surprised," Fineian states. I shrug. How do I explain why I'm surprised by kindness? It's not like the Blue Moon wolves were terrible towards me, except Brenda. But their kindness felt forced, as if it were an obligation to Theren rather than a genuine desire to see me happy. I hadn't been able to connect with any of them, and I knew it was because I was too different by no fault of their own. We were raised differently with a different set of ethics and morals.

Finian's gaze goes to my hoodie. His hoodie. "Sorry," I immediately apologize. "I should have asked before taking your clothes. I just found it in the closet and I get cold kind of easily, but I should have." Finian cuts me off. "I already told you that you don't have to apologize for anything or explain yourself. I just like seeing you in my clothes, that's all." I gulp, my cheeks burning. I hadn't really considered the implications of wearing something that belonged to him, the message that it may send. His eyes widen. "I shouldn't have said that," he muttered. "You should go to sleep. You've had a long day." I nod and he says good night before leaving the room.

An hour goes by and I can't sleep. Being in the room reminds me too much of the night I came here of the night Grayon died. I see the window and think about the times that Gray and I would wake up early to watch the sunset. The bed I lie on right now is the same bed I slept in plagued by nightmares of Gradon's heart. I feel trapped in this room and I long for the outside where the air is crisp and I have no traumas associated with it. But I'm in control of my life now. I can do as I please. I don't need to ask anyone for permission to go outside. I get out of bed and quietly make my way through the twisting hallways until I find the back door to the garden. Lying down on my back, I stare up at the stars and the moon, and I feel free, connected to my wolf to myself. Dozing off, I awaken when Finineian brings out a pillow and blankets. He gently lifts my head, placing a pillow underneath it and blankets over my body. I'm grateful when he doesn't question why I'm doing this and leaves me alone. I wake up again and I look back at the house. A light is on in one of the higher windows and I see the outline of Fineian's body undoubtedly watching over me. And that's where I sleep the next few nights, enjoying the peacefulness of the outdoors. My connection to nature, the only thing that hasn't been destroyed by that night. Sometimes when I wake up throughout the night, I look back at the house and there's always someone watching through a window. Usually Fineian, but sometimes Dean or Ronin are there watching over me. And those nights, I didn't have any nightmares.

Chapter 46.

For the next few days, I worked alongside Ronin in his garden. I apologized for the roses I hurled over, but Ronin brushed them off and said he didn't much care for roses anyway, and I was inclined to agree. He steered me clear of any more red flowers, and we spent the days kneeling over sunflowers, daisies, and yellow poppies. Wiping a bead of sweat off my forehead, I patted the soil gently around the bright yellow flower, coating the gardening gloves and dirt in the process. My jeans were also stained with mud on my kneecaps from all the hours spent kneeling over the plant plots. Ronan finished planting his own flower next to it, spraying it lightly with water.

"You're excellent with flowers, Onyx," Ronan praised, inspecting the ones I planted. "It's nice having someone here to help with the gardening." I shrug. "You seem to have built a fine garden already." He stands up, taking off his gloves and looking around the vast gardens that surround us. "Didn't have any interest in gardening until I met my mate. You would have loved her," he said wistfully, his eyes glazing over as he looked down at the freshly planted flowers. He told me a few days ago about his mate, who was murdered years before he met Fineian. The story was similar, too similar to Grace and had sent me into hysterics, which freaked Ronan out, who then called Fineian, who also freaked out and panicked. Ronan came to the porch later that night to apologize, and I apologized for being so sensitive. He had said he was the same way once his mate died, and the mere sight of flowers sent him into a rage at first. I had asked why he chose to garden if the flowers reminded him of her death. And he only corrected my statement by saying, "They stopped reminding me of her death and started reminding me of her." His statement perplexed me, as I didn't understand how he could separate his mate from her death. with Gradon. His death was so closely linked to my memories of him that any flashbacks sent me spiraling.

"Sorry," Ronin apologized after noticing I zoned out. Fine's friends had begun to see when I was on the brink of collapse and often tried to steer me away from whatever memories I brought up. I felt impossibly guilty for the burden I had become to them and felt even more guilty when they treated me with extreme kindness. "I shouldn't have brought her up." I smile slightly, pushing down my nausea. "It's okay. She sounds lovely." Ronan's face lights up. "She was. You should have seen the way that she would annoy Dean. She was always the first to call him out on whatever dumb idea he had or whatever joke he made. I've never seen someone get under Dean's skin like that until Finineian found us and we met Kalia. Kalia, Finny and Spitfire of a sister, is always eager to argue or fight with Dean. During their arguments, Ronan always stared at Calia in admiration, and I suspected he had a thing for her."

"Is that why you like Calia?" I asked softly, curiously. His eyebrows raise. "You think I love her?" he questions, surprised. I shrug. "I thought you might have a thing for her." Ronan sighs, folding the gloves neatly as we walked to the outdoor sink. "I like her a lot, and besides Dean, she's probably the other person closest to me. But not like that. I couldn't. Not after June," he said his deceased mate's name with sadness. "You have to understand, OnXa, my other half passed after I had already fallen in love with her. There is no one in the world who could compare to her, who could light up my life like she did. Not Calia, not anyone." His words hit me like a brick. I longed for a love like that. And now that I want to murder my mate, I would never get it.

"Aren't you lonely?" I asked quietly as we wash the dirt off our hands and arms. He looks away. "In some ways, the loneliness is better than being with someone who I wouldn't love. And there just isn't enough love left in my heart for anyone but June." I swallow, drying my hands off. My heart broke for Ronin, the most compassionate person I have ever met, who condemned himself to a lifetime of loneliness. I wondered if I was doomed to a similar fate.

"Did you love the?" Ronan asked suddenly as we walk past the poppies, and I abruptly stop walking, and he stops with me. I consider his words, staring at the flowers. "No," I answer finally. "I may have if we spent more time together." I bend over, touching one of the yellow petals, feeling its smoothness and letting it soothe me. He was handsome, charming, disarmingly so, I reluctantly admit he was the most charming man I had ever met, though the sample size was low enough as it was. He was poised, calm, and always knew what to say to people, making him extremely likable to everyone. I'm not sure anyone had a single negative thing to say about him. But I never felt like I knew him. I continue with the sudden realization. "Slept next to him for months and I felt like I didn't know the first thing about him. At first, I thought he was just keeping his distance because he was worried to get close in case if I lost the challenge. But even after, he was always gone. claiming he had work or whatever. I think he was afraid the mask would drop."

"The mask?" Ronan asks, bending down next to me. I nod numbly. "I didn't realize until too late that his kindness was a mask for who he really is. You You should have seen his face after he" I shuddered at the memory, chills running through my body despite the intense sunlight beating down on us. "I've never seen someone so cold. After he did it, he looked happy like it was a relief for him." I swallow the bile rising in my throat at the memory. I had only ever seen one other person look that stoic and possibly happy after killing Arriio.

"Finine isn't like that, you know," Ronin says quietly after a moment. "His kindness, it's genuine. The mask you saw on the you won't find it on Finine. He really cares for you." I ignore that statement. The last thing I wanted to think about was Finine's feelings for me, especially when we were able to coexist as friends, if you could even call it that. Ronin continues, "I can't imagine what it was like to go through that with the someone you thought you would be spending the rest of your life with. I saw the look on your face with I told you about June," he says gently. "But it doesn't have to be like that with you. Fine would be everything wasn't. Not a day would go by where you didn't feel loved." My hands start shaking. "Stop," I say harshly, getting up from the ground and walking away, leaving him leaning over the poppies. I couldn't ever think about Fineian that way. My mate had betrayed me in the worst way possible. And despite Finian's hospitality, I would never be able to open myself up to anyone. Not ever again. The used my feelings for Greyon against me in the most cruel and manipulative way. He knew that killing Gray would hurt me and that's why he did it. The punishment that continues to punish.

I walked out of the garden, going away from the house and into the woods. I couldn't get the picture of Theren's face after he killed Gray out of my head. "You fight the darkness instead of using it." A branch underneath my foot tripped me while I was distracted by the flashback, and I fell to the ground, my head colliding with the floor of the forest. I could see Gradon's corpse a few feet away, his body mangled and bloody. I reached out for him. I had to help him. His eyes turned to me and they were completely white. "Help me, Onexa!" he gasped, grabbing the gaping hole in his chest, blood covering his hands. Scrambling off the ground, I stumbled to Gradon, my vision blurred. I could faintly feel blood dripping down the side of my face. Suddenly, there were two Graysons, both bloody and pleading for me to hurry. I took shaky steps forward until I collided with a tree. My ears started ringing as blood ran down my face, obscuring my vision. My head was spinning and as a reflex, I threw up. When I picked my head back up, Gradon was gone. I frowned. "Gradon?" I called out, swiveling my head to look for him. He couldn't have gone far. Not when he was that injured. Leaves crunched from behind me. I turned around and exhaled in relief when I saw Gray.

"Gradon." "Thank God," I said, throwing my arms around him. He was no longer bloodied, his clothes untattered and clean. Gradon was calm. "Ona, I'm not." "We have to go," I interrupted him, pulling away to grab his wrist. "Theren could still be around. We have to get you to Fineian before he sees you." Gray was resistant to my tugging and he stayed rooted to the ground. "What are you doing, Gray?" I frantically pulled on his wrist, but he didn't budge. "We have to get out of here now or Theren will kill you." He looked at me sadly, his hazel eyes filled with pain. For some reason, they looked green today. No flecks of brown. "Ona, I'm not grayed on." I laugh. "Now isn't the time for pranks, Gray. We have to get out of here. Don't worry. Fine will take care of you. I promise Theron won't find you. Fine can protect you." Gray grabs my hand gently. "Ona, I am Fineian." I shake my head slowly. "No, no," I whisper. Gray's face contorts and suddenly Finine is the one holding my hand. "Where did he go?" I ask frantically looking around. "He was just here." He fine grabs the side of my face, forcing me to stare into his green eyes. He wipes some of the blood off my face with his hand. "You hit your head," he mutters. "We have to take you to Ronin." My head is still spinning. "But Gray, Onixa, Gradon is gone," Fineian says gently, his gaze pained. "He died over a week ago. You hit your head. You're hallucinating." My vision is blurry and I stumble. Fine catches me, swooping me up into his arms. The abrupt motion makes my nausea amplify tenfold. Fine swears and holds me to the side while I throw up all over the ground, holding my hair back as he does so. When I'm done, Fineian swiftly walks us back to his home, carefully holding me so the jostling wouldn't make me ill.

"He's really gone, isn't he?" I ask quietly, my heart squeezing. He looks down at me in sympathy. "I'm so sorry, Onexa," he says as he squeezes me tighter. I bury my face into his chest as uncontrollable sobs rack my body.

Chapter 47.

"You're all healed, Onixa. Just try to take it easy, okay? I can heal the physical trauma from where you hit your head, but you may still feel the aftermath of the concussion," Ronin says from beside the cot I'm sitting on. Fine, who is observing from across the small infirmary room in silence, leaves the room, motioning for Ronin to follow him into the hallway. I can't make out all of the conversation, only a few words here and there, such as concussion, memory loss, hallucinations, and one that feels like a knife in my chest. Graed on. Whatever Ronin told Finine, he was displeased by it. He looked agitated as he threw the door back open, but his eyes softened as he looked at me. "How's your head?" he asks, sitting in the chair next to me. "Fine," I shrug. "I feel dumb. I just tripped. It's not a big deal." Fine hesitates. "Are you seeing things you shouldn't be?" Flinching, I recall how I had thought that Fineian was great on. "I'm so sorry about that. I'm not sure what got into me," I begin to apologize, but Fineian cuts me off. "Hey, don't worry about it," Finian says, clasping my hand reassuringly. "You have nothing to apologize for except for being the reason is dead," I think to myself bitterly.

"Ronin, he thinks you should talk to someone," Fineian says, and I can tell that he's trying to keep his tone light about what you're going through. He said, "Your condition will get worse if you keep ignoring it." My eyebrows pull together. "What? Like a therapist?" Fine chuckles slightly. "Not exactly. We're a little short on people with psychology degrees. Reason being that we're rogues in the middle of nowhere. But I think you could benefit from talking to Kalia and Astra about it." "Why them?" I ask in confusion. Out of all of their little band of rogues, Astra seemed like the least likely person to help talk through what happened to me. Not that she appeared mean, just distant and aloof. "Not unlike the Kalia has a certain gift that helps her decipher emotions," he says, leaning forward, his eyebrows furrowed. "Astra, she went through something traumatic as well when she was much, much younger. I think that they could really help you open up."

"No," I say quickly. "I mean, no, thank you. I don't want to do that. Not at all." Fine in sighs and looks at me sadly. "You can't keep this inside you, Onixa. Just give them a chance, okay? If you hate it, I'll never make you talk to them again, and I'll let it go." I'm tempted to say no, but something on his face makes me reconsider. "Okay," I agree slowly. "But you promise you won't bring it up again if I do it?" Fine exhales in relief. "Yes, Onixa, I promise. I think this will be good for you." He squeezes my hand reassuringly and smiles, and I feel my cheeks warm as butterflies fill my stomach. What the heck? Butterflies. I ripped my hand away in surprise. Finian may be attractive, but it was the first thing I noticed when he helped me escape, but I certainly did not have feelings for him, regardless of how nice he may or may not be. "Um," I say eloquently, trying to clear my head. "So, when do I have to talk to them?"

"You can go clean up and change first," Fineian says with an easygoing smile. "Then meet them in the library. Do you remember where that is?" I nod. I had been there a few times to select additional reading material. I still hadn't been able to bring myself to read a tale of two cities yet. For some reason, I felt too scared to open it and read all of his annotations. "Here," Finineian stretches out his hand, an offering. "Let me walk you back to your room." I hesitate before taking his hand. "It's just a hand, Onixa. Just take the stupid hand," I tell myself as I take the hand, ignoring the electricity I feel from our touch. Once we get to the room, I pause at the door.

"Is something wrong?" Ona Finian asks me in concern. "Um, I don't want to stay in this room anymore," I say quietly. "It reminds me too much of the night I came here and therefore too much of great." At Fineian's sad look, I quickly add on to my original statement. "It's not that I don't like the room. Really, I think you did a great job decorating it, and I don't even necessarily hate the color you chose. It's just that I" To my relief, Fineian cuts off my incessant rambling. "Hey," he says softly, and I flinch as he cups my cheek with his hand. I hate that I don't hate the way it feels. "I told you that you don't ever have to justify yourself to me. I'll move all of your stuff to a different room. It's no problem at all really." I smile ruefully. He's sweet, much too sweet, and for some reason it freaks me out. "Just wait out here, okay? I'll get you some fresh clothes and I'll take you to a different bathroom." Fine smiles at me before going into the room. He returns a few moments later, clothes clutched in his arms.

"Can Can I have one of your hoodies?" I ask shyly. His eyes widen and I quickly go back on my request. "Air. Never mind. It's actually a little too warm outside for that. I mean, seriously, is anyone focusing on global warming these days? For one, I'm concerned about the polar bears. Did you know that?" Vine's hand covers my mouth and I gulp. "Ona, it's fine." He laughs and his green eyes are glowing in happiness. "I have more in my room. I was going to take you there anyways to wash up." I nod, my eyes as big as the moon as he removes his hand. To my surprise, the journey to his room was a short one. He's staying right next to me. In hindsight, it shouldn't be that surprising given his clinginess. My mouth drops as he opens the door, and we step inside. Intricate trees are painted along the walls, so detailed that I can see every swirl on the bark, every vein on the green leaves. The ceiling is what truly impresses me. It's black, but bright stars are painted all over, and it looks exactly like the night sky I've been staring at for the last few nights.

"Did you paint this yourself?" I ask in surprise, running my hand along the wall. "It looks so lifelike." Fine nods, a small smile gracing his face. "I did. It took weeks, but I like the way it turned out." My throat suddenly feels dry. "Why?" I whisper. "Why did you paint it like this?" His eyes soften as he looks at the painted walls. "Do you really have to ask, Ona?" he asks quietly. I freeze. "I don't know what you mean." "You're my other half. You know why I painted it like this?" "I have to shower," I blurt out, and run into the bathroom, locking it behind me, though I doubt he would have followed me. Something about Finine gets under my skin. It's unnatural the way he seems to know me. I shower quickly using his shampoo and body wash, and I'm overwhelmed by the smell of him. It's nearly intoxicating. I dry off using a clean towel from the cabinet and get dressed, pulling on clothes Finine picked out. When I leave the bathroom, I'm surprised to see that Finine is lying on his bed. I thought he would have gone. He sits up holding out a navy blue sweatshirt. Hesitantly, I walk towards the bed and take it out of his hands. Fine stares at me intensely.

"What?" I say defensively as I pull on the hoodie, letting it fall to right above my knees. "You smell like me," he remarks quietly, his face unreadable. "Oh, I realize now. Sorry, it's just that." Fine abruptly stands up and both of his hands move to the side of my face. I feel frozen, trapped in his gaze. I take a shallow breath. Is he going to kiss me? Even worse, did I want him to? "Ona, I know you aren't ready for this for me, but when you are," he pulls me in for a hug, and I'm so surprised. I don't pull away. "I'll be here. I'll always be here." He pulls back after a minute, and I don't know what to say, so I decide to keep my mouth closed before I start babbling incessantly.

"Are you ready to meet up with Kalia and Astra?" he asks. And I'm glad he didn't say anything else related to his emotions. I nod and we leave his room heading for the library. I'm thankful that he's taking me because I realize now that I would have had a difficult time finding it. "Why did you design the house like this?" I asked curiously. "The hallways are so confusing." "That's precisely why I designed the house like this," Finian explains. "It would make it hard for an intruder to find whatever or whoever they're looking for. Not to mention, it would take them a while for them to find an exit." "Spoken like a true protector," I tease, earning a boisterous laugh from him. "Fair enough," he admits, and a lovely blush spreads across his cheeks. We reach the door of the library. "I'll be in the movie room if you want to see me after you talk with Kalia and Astra." I nod, opening the door. The two women are sitting on the floor laughing about something when I walk in and stop when they see me.

"Hey, Nyx," Kalia greets me with a smile. "Hi," I say quietly and sit on the floor across from them. "So Finineian roped you guys into being therapists for the day." "For the time being, you must address me as Dr. Phil," Kalia laughs, flipping her short blonde hair. Astra rolls her dark eyes. "He's not even a real doctor." "Neither am I," Kalia scoffs, elbowing her. "Okay, Onixa, let's get started. How are you feeling right now?" I blink. Astra stares at me, her eyes burning through me. She's the most intense person I've ever met. "Um, fine."

"You're confused," Kalia murmurs, her head cocked to the side as she examines me. "Let's start there. What are you confused about?" "What's your gift?" I ask, answering her question with a question. "I can tell how people are feeling. Read their emotions," Calia explains and pauses. "But even now that I answered your question, you're still confused. What are you confused about, Onixa?" Stammering, I say. "Um, I don't know." Astra's eyes are still focused on me like a hawk. "It's Finineian, isn't it? You're confused about your feelings for Finian," she says, her voice smooth. "No," I quickly deny it. "I already know that I don't have any feelings for him." Calia grabs my hand. "Physical contact will help me better read you," she mutters, and closes her eyes momentarily before opening them. "Tell me about your friend, Gradon." My heart drops and I yank my hand away. "I can't talk about that," I hiss. "You need to," Astra says bluntly, and I can see her fists tightening. "It's the only way to work through trauma." If she didn't scare me so much, I might have asked her what exactly happened to her.

"Close your eyes," Kalia instructs gently, and I hesitate, but ultimately close them. Her warm hand grabs my much cooler one once again. "Tell me something about Gray, Onixa. How did you meet?" The memory of Gradon coming into my home comes back with a vengeance. "What are the odds that the first cabin in the forest I break into belongs to the prettiest rogue I've ever seen?" He broke into my cabin. I stammer out. "I told him to leave and not come back, but he showed up the next day and never left." "How did you feel about him, Onixa?" Kalia asks and her voice is calm, soothing. It sounds like she's a million miles away. "I loved him," I choked out and I could feel tears streaming down my face. "He was my best friend, my only friend. His face was the only one I saw for years."

"Why don't you tell me about the night you came here, Onixa?" Kalia asks, and her thumb strokes my hand softly. "My ribs were shattered. I was so focused on Gradon, I couldn't even hear the bones crack. His magic paralyzed me, but I could still feel the way my bone splinters dug into my heart. Please," I begged him. "But I could tell even from that moment that there was no chance for Gray. I had never seen eyes that cold, that emotionless. Don't do this, Theren. I'll let you mark me, anything you want. Just don't do this. It was desperate. I knew it. But I would have done anything to save Gray, given Theren whatever he wanted. Part of me still hoped that Theren wouldn't do it. Where mates, he can't just kill my best friend in front of me so heartlessly. Mates don't do that." I hadn't spoken out loud, too terrorized by the flashback. But Kalia coaxed me gently. "It's okay, Onixa. Astra and I are here. You're safe. You are not in Blue Moon. You're safe. Deep in the woods, far away from that place." Breathing in deeply, I try to get the words out through sobs. "I begged him not to. I told him I would let him mark me. You have to know that I would have done anything," I cry out, begging them to understand that I never wanted any of this.

"I know you would have, Onixa," Astra says, and I'm momentarily caught off guard by the softness of her voice. "Can you tell us what happened next? Remember, nobody can hurt you here. It's safe to tell us." "Theren didn't hesitate to shove his hand into Gradon's chest. It's almost like my pleading made him angrier as if it was what put him over the edge. Gradon inhaled sharply, and I realized in agony that it was the last breath he would ever take. There were no emotions on Theren's face as he sharply twisted his hand and pulled out a bloody heart. I was screaming. It was so loud it felt like my throat ruptured. Great on." I scream and suddenly it feels like I can't breathe. There's too much magic. There's magic and it's suffocating me. I start hyperventilating, but my ribs are broken and my lungs are punctured. I hear Astra say, but I'm still paralyzed and I can't move. Can't breathe. "You know why you can't control your magic?" The sne is bloody. Gradon crumples to the ground. His eyes are frozen in his last emotion. Fear. He knew what was coming and I couldn't stop it. "You fight the darkness instead of using it." I'm clutching at my throat, gasping for air. My eyes are open, but all I see is darkness. I think I'm still calling out for grade on when I pass out.

Chapter 48.

Blinking. My eyes open. I see stars. Literally, I see actual stars. I'm outside. My eyes blink a few more times and I squint. No, I realize I'm inside Finineian's bedroom. I sit up quickly, jumping when I see Finineian sitting in a chair in the corner. "What happened?" I ask, groaning as I rub my temples. It feels like someone hit me over the head with a baseball bat repeatedly. Fine gets out of his chair and sits on the edge of the bed, his eyebrows pulled together. "What's the last thing you remember?" Frowning, I struggled to recollect what happened. I was in Fineian's room. We went to the library to see Kalia and Astra. We talked about Gray. I don't know what happened. I groan again as I feel a searing pain in my head. I was talking about Gradon. I don't know what happened after that. Fine looks at me in sympathy and takes my hand.

"Astra thinks you had a panic attack and passed out. She said it looked like you couldn't breathe. She called for Ronin and me once you and Calia were unconscious." Panic floods me. "Oh my god, my gift!" I gasp. "Did I hurt her?" "What?" he asks in confusion before his eyes flash in recognition. "You didn't use your gift against her. Her gift is the reason she passed out. She woke up already and I spoke with her. She said she said your emotions were too intense and it knocked her out. She could feel what you were feeling and when you had the panic attack," his voice trails off and he looks away. I get up off the bed and tell Fineian I have to go apologize to her. "Where is she?" "Maybe you should take it easy for a while," Fine suggests looking at me in concern. "I'm not sure if it's a good idea for you to see her right now. Not after what happened the last time." My eyes widen. "I won't hurt her, Fineian. I wouldn't do that. I swear it was just an accident. I didn't mean to." Fine cuts me off. "It's not Calia I'm worried about. I shouldn't have forced you to talk to them. I shouldn't have pushed for it, Onixa. I'm so sorry." I shrug. "It probably would have happened sooner or later."

Suddenly, the overwhelming urge to laugh overtakes me. And soon, I'm doubled over as giggles spill from my lips. "Oh my god, I am such a disaster," I say, laughing so hard that tears start to form in my eyes. "Ona, maybe you should." I can't even imagine what Gray would say if he saw me like this. I snort. Actually, no, I can. He would be like, "Nick's baby, you're being a drama queen. Not even I care about what happened that much, and I'm the one who died." Dot. I feel slightly delirious, but for some reason, thinking of Gradon's reaction makes me laugh unbearably hard. I'm actually going crazy. "He wouldn't want you to torment yourself like this," Fine gently claims. "He sounds like he was a really good guy. I wish I got the chance to meet him." My smile fades as the reality of the situation sets back in. "He was," I say softly, and Fineian gives me an encouraging smile. "You would have liked him. You both complain a lot about new girl." Fine laughs gently. I can see he had excellent taste as well. I look out the window and see that the sun is setting. He liked sunsets, too, more than sunrises, that's for sure. He wasn't overly thrilled when I would wake him up at the crack of dawn to watch the sun rise. But we never missed a sunset, I tell him for some reason. It hurts less than I thought it would. "Keep focusing on the good memories, Onixa," Finineian says, and squeezes my hand reassuringly. "It's how he would want you to remember him." I smile sadly, and I realize that he's right. Replaying his death in my mind on a loop is doing more harm than good, and it's clearly a trigger for my anxiety. I know one day

I'll have to confront the memory, but today is not the day. Why don't we go outside and watch the sunset?

Fine suggests. I could round up some food and tea and we could sit in the garden.

Ronin says, "You both have made excellent progress on it."

I nod. That's fine, but I should really go talk to Kalia. I feel awful about this. Fine looks hesitant, but agrees to take me to her.

We go to the infirmary and I can hear Kalia's laughter before we even reach the door. "I told you that you're too ugly for her. Maybe next time you hit on a girl, put a paper bag over your head." Kalia's voice reverberates throughout the hallway.

"Told you she was fine," Fine mutters under his breath to me as he rolls his eyes.

We walk through the door and Kalia is sitting up on the cot, Ronan on one side and Dean on the other. "Onixa." Dean grins. "Is Finine finally done keeping you all to himself?"

"Dean Fineian warns, but I can see him blush." Kalia throws her head back and laughs. "Look, Ro, he looks as red as the tomatoes you plant."

Ronan stifles a laugh and wisely chooses to change the subject. "How are you feeling, Onixa? When you passed out, I checked you for injuries, but didn't find anything physical."

"I'm fine," I reassured him. "I just came to um..." Kalia quickly figures out why I'm here. "Ronin. Ronin's ugly brother."

"My ugly brother, can you get out and leave us alone for a minute?"

Ronin smiles slightly while Fineian rolls his eyes and Dean grumbles something incoherently as they leave the room. Fine hesitates before closing the door. "Just yell if you need something, Onixa. I'll be right outside." He flashes a quick smile before shutting the door behind him.

"God, he's so whipped," Calia laughs once the room is cleared. "I've never seen someone hover so much."

I smile slightly. "It's kind of nice," I surprise myself by saying, "to have someone care that much. I... I'm not used to it."

"He's a good guy, Onixa," Kalia says, her voice uncharacteristically serious. She pauses. "He's not, you know."

"I know," I say quietly. I decide to change the subject as I'm not comfortable talking about her brother with her. "Anyways, I just wanted to check in on you. And you know, I'm sorry. So, so sorry about this. I swear I didn't know."

"Ona, shut up," Kalia giggles. "I'm perfectly fine. Really? I wasn't even out for that long."

I sit down next to her in Ronan's former seat. "I just feel bad. I didn't mean to drag you into my mess."

Kalia shrugs. "It's my fault for being so nosy. I pushed Finny in to let me talk to you. I thought I could help. I didn't realize you were uh such a disaster."

I smile slightly in a weird way. "I think it did help. Reliving through the whole memory completely like that. When... when I think of it in fragments, it catches me off guard. I think... I think talking it through made it less terrifying."

Kalia's eyebrows pull together and she looks like something is bothering her. "What is it?" I ask.

Kalia tugs on the bottom of her shirt anxiously. "When I was, you know, using my gift. Your emotions were bad." I frown, not understanding. "Obviously, no. Not just like sad bad like bad bad." She hesitates. "I could feel your rage. Honestly, Nyx, it was scary. I've never felt so much darkness."

"What was that?" My heart races. She could sense the darkness in me, just like the seer had. It wasn't just my imagination. The darkness was there and it was real.

"You can't say anything about it to anyone, especially not Fine."

"Okay," I quickly tell her, grabbing her wrist.

"I won't, Onixa. I promise," Calia swears. Her eyes big and I release her hand apologetically.

"It's my gift," I whisper in case Finineian is listening through the door. "I was cursed with it by the moon goddess. The darkness, it latches onto me when I use it."

To my surprise, Kalia laughs. "Ona, you aren't cursed by the moon goddess because you're evil. You're given a dangerous gift because she trusts that you'll wield it with caution."

"You think so?" I ask in surprise. The seer made it sound like the gift would consume me if I gave into the darkness.

"I know," So Calia reassures me. "Really?"

"I think you should talk to Finineian about this. He would know."

I tilt my head to the side. "What do you mean he would know?"

Calia winks. "Ask him yourself." Little Nyx as if on cue. There's a knock on the door. "Ona." Fine's voice calls out. "You'll miss the sunset."

Kalia's nose wrinkles. "Don't tell me Finine roped you into one of his sunset adventures. You give into one sunset and then he'll wake you up every morning at the crack of dawn for a sunrise and it's a neverending cycle of no sleep."

My heart nearly stops. "He... He does that?" I choke out. "No, no, he couldn't be like that. Like me."

"What? Wake everyone up just because the sky is freaking pink?" She snorts. "He does it all the time. Don't worry, though. If you really hate waking up that early, I doubt he'd make you do it. Don't think he'd ever tell you no," she teases.

I shake my head. "No, it's not that. I do like them. I just... I didn't know he did that, too."

Calia grimaces. "Mates are the worst." Cringing at the word, I get up and go to the door where Finineian is pacing anxiously in the hallway.

"What you got in there?" I ask, pointing to the basket in his hands.

He looks up at me and smiles, his eyes twinkling. "Food. I thought you might like a picnic in the garden." Now that he mentions it, I actually am starving.

He leads us out to the garden, stopping in his room on the way out to grab a blanket. We go out to the garden and Fineian lays the blanket down. We sit down and he opens up the wicker basket. The first thing he pulls out is a bottle of wine.

"I'm not 21 yet, silly," I giggle.

Fine laughs. "You've never drank before?" My smile falters at the memory of drinking in the club with the... "No, no, can't think about that night because if I think about that night." "No, I have," I force a fake smile. "Just thought you might want to know that you're plying someone underage with alcohol."

"I hope there aren't any police around," he jokes, chuckling slightly. "You don't have to drink it if you don't want to, obviously. I don't know. I just thought maybe it might help you feel a little better."

My eyebrows raise. "Aren't people supposed to not drink away their pain?"

Fine shrugs. "I haven't had any issue with it before." He winks and keeps pulling food out of the picnic basket until it's empty. "All vegetarian, of course," he reassures me. He produces two wine glasses and opens the bottle, pouring one for himself. "Would you like a glass? I'm willing to risk the jail time if you are," he says with a smile.

I laugh. "Fine, one glass." We sip the wine as we dig into the food and watch the sunset. My thoughts are entirely occupied by Kalia's obscure comment about Finineian understanding the darkness.

"Can I ask you a question?" I ask nervously as I eat a grape and take a big gulp of the wine.

"Anything?" He smiles as he stretches his long legs out on the blanket. "I mean, seriously, how can someone have such long legs? It's so unfair that guys get to be so tall. Like, who wouldn't want to be over 6 ft? Not that I disliked his height. I mean, what girl doesn't like tall guys? Not that I like Finineian. Not in that way, obviously."

"Ona, your question," he prompts me, yanking me out of my off-topic stream of thoughts.

"Right. Um, I was just wondering." I take another drink, trying to find the courage to ask, "What's your gift?" I blurt out.

Fine's eyes widen and he takes another drink, his Adam's apple bobbing. "Oh, God. I'm so sorry," I immediately apologize. "I know it's rude to ask, but you know, it's just that I feel like I don't really know that much about you when you seem to know a lot about me. And I mean a lot. Like seriously, if you can read minds or manipulate them or something, I should definitely get to know you because that would be really..."

Fine's voice cuts me off. "No, it's fine. You're my mate. I don't mind telling you about it, but don't freak out, okay?"

My heart races. "Why would I freak out?"

Fine winces. "It's not the most friendly gift. Just know that I never use it on people, okay?" I swallow nervously and nod. "What is it?"

"It's easier if I just show you," he mutters. He picks a nearby flower, holding it in his palm. "Don't be scared, Ona. I promise I wouldn't ever use it to hurt you." His words scare me even more. What the hell was he going to do?

The petals on the flower sway slightly in the wind and Fineian winces again. And a moment later, the entire flower is reduced to dust.

Chapter 49.

Fine had dissolved the entire flower into dust. I stared at the dust settled in his palm until the wind picked up and the dust swirled out of his palm and into the air, never to be seen again.

"I... You... What?" I say incoherently, completely dumbstruck.

Fine wipes his hand off on his shoulder. "Kalia calls it dusting. Kind of an inside joke." But yeah, I'm sure my mouth dropped open and I was almost on the ground.

"You can just turn things into dust."

Fine nods. "Even people?" Fine looks away. "Yeah, I did it once accidentally when I was younger. Kalia and I came across a rogue when we were outside playing and it just happened out of instinct. Maybe it was the first time I used it." I was speechless, but weirdly enough, I wasn't scared. Calia was right. He did understand the darkness just as well as I did.

"On... Finian," said worriedly, "I meant it when I said I don't use it on people."

I shake my head in disbelief. "No, I know. I believe you. Something similar happened to me when I was young, too. Killmore." The reason I had been kicked out of Crimson Shadow.

"We aren't our gifts, you know," Finineian says quietly as he takes my hand in his much warmer one. "The ability to destroy doesn't mean we have to. I know you don't want to hurt anyone. I don't either." I stared into his green eyes, and I couldn't believe how much of me he sees. I feel understood in a way I didn't know was possible. The sun had finally set and the only light came from the moon, which was bright enough that I could see enough to really see how attractive he is. He looked adorable in his green flannel and jeans, and his light brown hair was slightly tousled in a handsome way. My heart pounds in my chest when he leans in, and his lips are mere inches away from mine.

"Wait," I stammer out. "I can't do this, Finian. I'm so sorry. You're a really nice guy. Like seriously, the nicest guy I've ever met. And obviously you're attractive. Like super hot. But I just can't give you more. Not in the way you want. Not after, you know." I couldn't deny that I was attracted to Finian. Anyone would be. He had the purest heart out of anyone I know. Kidnapping aside. And even more significantly, he seemed to understand every part of my soul truly. But Theren had destroyed any chance I had at true love. As much as I hate him, he's my mate and therefore the only one that I would have been able to fall in love with. And when he ripped out Gradon's heart, he had ripped out mine as well. I wouldn't ever be able to trust someone again and wouldn't be able to love as freely as I once had.

Fine nods, withdrawing his hand and pulling away. "I understand," he says with a small smile. "I wouldn't ever, you know, want to pressure you." That makes my heart break even more. He's perfect. So perfect it makes my head spin. Theren and I had been fighting before I left about marking and he was so insistent on doing it and here Fineian was giving me all of the time I wanted.

"You should find someone else," I tell him. Even though the words make my stomach turn. "I can't love or trust anyone after him. But you're a great guy, Fineian. You would make another girl really happy. I know it."

He shakes his head slowly, his eyes piercing through me. "You know I can't do that, Onxa. There is nobody else I want. It's fine if you don't want to be with me. Really, it is. I can live with having you in my life as a friend. But make no mistake, there is nobody else I could ever want as much as I want you."

I gulp nervously, and there's another gust of wind, though that's only part of the reason why I shiver. "Come on, let's get you inside before it gets too cold," Fineian says, and begins to put the empty dishes back in the basket.

We go back into the house and I can hear yelling. Obviously, it's Kalia. "No, you chose the movie the last time. It's my turn!" She screeches and I hear a thud. "Ouch. Seriously, you brat. That hurt," Dean yells back.

Fine winces. "They're having a movie night. I know it doesn't seem that appealing given the company, namely Kalia and Dean, but would you want to join?" Still feeling guilty from rejecting him once tonight. I agree.

"Sure. Sounds fun," I say. And I'm rewarded with a breathtaking smile. I mean, seriously, this guy could be a model. He guides us to the movie room. The hallway's still too confusing for me to navigate. When we get there, Kalia and Dean are wrestling for the remote while Ronin tries to break them apart. Astra and Willis are snuggled up on one of the large recliners under a blanket.

Their fighting stops when we walk in. "Oh, hey, Onixa," Kalia grins at me. "You're just in time for movie night."

"We're watching killer clowns and evil babies," Dean says excitedly, getting off the ground and untangling himself from Calia.

"No, we aren't," Calia argues. "I told you that I want to watch Love in Paris."

"And I told you that sounds boring and terrible. I still haven't recovered from The Notebook," he shudders in disgust.

"You love The Notebook," Ronin contradicts quietly. "You cried for an hour."

Dean's eyes glaze over. "They died in each other's arms. What kind of monster wouldn't cry?"

"I didn't," Astra interjects and Willis laughs as he pulls her closer to him.

"My point exactly," Dean mutters and Kalia chucks the remote at him and it makes a horrible cracking sound as it hits his skull. "That's it. Fine. I hope you don't mind becoming an only child."

Fine in size as he rolls his eyes. "Just choose a movie, Dean. Kalia, stop being a brat and go sit down." Dean gives Kalia a victorious smirk and she scowls as she gets up and sits in one of the recliners. And Dean takes the one on the other side of Ronin.

"I doubt Onixa wants to watch a movie on killer clowns and babies," she says, looking at me hopefully.

"Only the clowns are killers. The babies are just evil," Dean points out and looks at me equally hopefully.

"You don't mind, right, Onixa?" Oh god, not a decision. I hate making those. "Um, whatever is fine," I say, already feeling bad for how much trouble I had caused since coming here.

Fine looks at me in concern and whispers. "Are you sure? We can watch the romance movie if you want. I can't imagine you'd want to watch a horror film."

"She said it was fine," Kasanova, relax," Dean grins wickedly. "And since your lovely sister so generously gave me the remote, I choose the killer clowns."

Fine rubs his temples, no doubt feeling a headache from the two wolves. "Fine. Killer clowns and evil babies it is." Kalia and Dean continue arguing as they turn on Netflix. And Ronin tries to suggest a movie that straddles the line between romance and gore. And then I realize that there's only one recliner left.

Finian must have sensed my anxiety because he quickly whispers, "Don't worry, I'll take the floor."

I frown. "Don't be ridiculous. I'm the guest. I'll take the floor."

Fine's eyes soften. "You're not a guest, Onixa. This is your home. I'm taking the floor. Please don't argue. I really don't mind."

I hesitate before saying, "We could just share." "I promise not to take up all the space," I joke nervously, though the idea of being that close to him makes my hands clammy.

His face lights up. "Perfect. I'll get a blanket for you." I sit down in the oversized recliner, thankful that there's so much space. Fine turns out the lights and returns with a blanket, lying down next to me. Despite how big the chair is, Finineian is huge and his shoulders and legs brush against mine as he puts the blanket over us.

Dean turns on the killer clown movie despite Kalia's protests and within the first two minutes someone gets decapitated. My stomach turns over and I try to shove out pictures of Gradon from my mind. It's just a movie. My skin tingles from where Finine is touching me and my heart races throughout the movie and it's not because of the evil babies. I sneak glances at Fineian throughout the film, noticing how he winces whenever something violent is occurring. He doesn't like the movie either. The soft glow from the television makes the planes of his face defined. And I'm so entranced by his beauty that I forget I'm staring until he looks at me in concern.

"Do you want to leave?" I shouldn't have let Dean put this on," he whispers low enough for only me to hear.

I shake my head, not wanting to cause a scene. Having Finian next to me made the movie less frightening. I realize, as crazy as it sounds, I can't help but feel safe with him, despite his dangerous gift. I almost exhale with relief when the movie is over.

"Thank God," Calia groans, echoing my thoughts. "That was the worst movie ever. I'm going to need to watch 6 hours of Family Guy just to fall asleep tonight."

Dean snorts. "How would you know? Your hands were covering your eyes the whole time."

Kalia glares at him. "Two words, paper, bag." They continue bickering while Finineian gets up and turns on the lights. And we all leave the room except for Kalia, Dean, and Ronin, who are arguing over whether to watch Family Guy or The Simpsons.

"Are you tired?" I can take you to bed," Finineian says as we stretch our legs, and I nod. He takes me back to the hallway with my room, and I hesitate.

"I can't sleep in there," I mumble.

Fine smiles sadly. "I know you can sleep in here. I already moved your stuff in," he says and opens the door to his bedroom. My eyes widen. "I can't stay in here. This is your room."

"I don't mind really. I know you like the walls. I'm sure you'd sleep better in it. Not to mention be safer than you are when you actually sleep outside," he says genuinely. He wasn't wrong. I enjoyed sleeping outside, but it was getting pretty cold. Plus, I felt guilty about having them watch over me.

"But where will you sleep?"

He shrugs. "There's plenty of empty rooms. I'll just stay in one of those. Seriously, it would make me more than happy to have you in here." His words make my heart squeeze. Goddess, he's so kind.

"Good night, Onixa," Finian whispers before kissing my forehead and closing the door before leaving.

That night, I go to sleep looking at the stars, but all I see is Fineian's face.

Chapter 50.

That night, I had no nightmares and woke up in the morning feeling for the first time in a while, okay? Like things might be fine. Almost as soon as I wake up, there's a knock on the door. I locked the door behind Fineian last night, so I got out of bed to let him in. When I open the door, Fineian stares at me, his eyes wide.

"What?" I say self-consciously and tug his oversized shirt I wore to sleep down a little more. Though it already almost reaches my knees.

"I um..." he says breathlessly. He shakes his head like he's trying to shake off a spell. "I wanted to take you somewhere today."

"Where?"

"It's a surprise. Just wear a swimsuit under your clothes. Okay. That's all I'm going to say about it," he says smiling so big his excitement is contagious.

I gasp. "We're going swimming. I love swimming."

Fine laughs as his eyes light up. "I'm glad. As soon as you're dressed and eat breakfast, we'll go."

"Okay," I squeal and accidentally shut the door in his face. What? It's not like I was going to let him watch me get dressed.

I go into the closet, which is now overflowing with both mine and Finineian's clothing. Unsurprisingly, I'm able to find a stack of bathing suits. I wondered if he picked out the clothing or if Kalia did because all of them are surprisingly tasteful. I decide on a light blue bikini that has silver flowers embroidered on it. I pull on a pair of blue shorts and a white tank top and continue digging around in Finian's drawers until I find another hoodie and put that on too, just in case it's still chilly outside. Once I'm dressed, I go downstairs to see Finineian, Calia, Dean, Ronin, Astra, and Willis sitting around the table eating breakfast.

Fine pulls out a seat next to him. "Come sit. Calia made pancakes." I sit next to him and I reach for the jug of orange juice, but Dean says, "I wouldn't drink that if I were you." I withdraw my hand. "What did you do to it?" I ask nervously.

Dean scoffs. "Must I be blamed for everything in this house? I didn't do anything to it. Kalia made it with rose oranges from scratch. Tastes terrible."

"Like you could do better," Kalia snaps at him.

"It's not that bad, Onixa." She takes a sip and grimaces. "Um, I think I'm fine with water," I quickly say, and Ronin chuckles as he hands me the water pitcher. "Good choice," Dean whispers to me loudly enough so Calia could hear and she scowls at him.

"So Fineian told me he's taking you to the lake today. I have to say I'm sad Finineian won't let us come. I don't want to miss out on seeing you in a bikini." My cheeks flush as I take a bite of a pancake and Fineian kicks Dean under the table. "It was supposed to be a surprise. Thank you very much, Dean," he mutters, rolling his eyes.

"Whoops," Dean says with his mouth full.

"You look well today, Onixa," Astra says, sounding surprised. My blush deepens. "Um, thanks."

"Your emotions," Kalia says suddenly, leaning forward. "They're nice today. You're happy." I shift uncomfortably in my chair.

"Jesus, Kell. If you're going to snoop on her emotions, at least have the decency to keep them to yourself," Ronin chastises her, but she's undeterred. "What? I said it's nice," she says defensively.

Fine rolls his eyes and stands up. "All right, that's enough. We're leaving. You guys are the worst." I get up and push my chair in, glad that Finineian was saving me from Kalia and Dean.

"Liar. I know your emotions, and I know that you love us," Kalia teases, waving her fork at him. "And you also, Levivve." Her voice is cut off when Ronin puts his hand on hers. "Don't," he says quietly, shaking his head.

"What? I was going to say pancakes," she winks and Dean laughs.

"I really, really hate you all," Finian groans and grabs my hand before leading us out the door, stopping only to catch a backpack that he slings over his shoulder. We start walking into the woods and I feel on edge, waiting for someone to jump out and attack us.

"Sorry about that," Vinnian says after a while of walking in silence. "I know Kalia is a lot." I smile. "It's okay. You guys are like a family. It's nice."

"Is she right?" Fine asks quietly after a moment. "Are you happy?" His question makes me think. "Am I happy? I don't think I'll ever be happy again," I answer honestly. "I think a part of me will always be broken inside. I don't think I could ever go back to the way I was before."

Fine looks pensive. "That doesn't have to be a bad thing, you know. Changing... it's good. Such is life."

"I didn't want anything to change," I admit. His jaw clenches. "You wanted to stay with the..." eyes widen. "No, I meant I didn't want anything to change from before. When I lived with Gradon as a rogue, the day found me. I thought it was going to be the happiest day of my life," I say as my throat tightens. "I mean, who doesn't look forward to meeting their mate?"

"Mates? They aren't all they're cracked up to be," I say drily with a small smile. I can tell that Fineian wants to say something about how we are mates, but thankfully he doesn't.

"For what it's worth. I am sorry he killed your friend. I wanted you to come back. Hell, I prayed for it. But I didn't want it to happen. Not the way it did," he says softly.

I swallow thickly. "It's not your fault. I'm lucky I had you to come to that night. I don't know where else I would have gone."

Fine. Ian looks at me sadly and squeezes my hand. "The night I found you was the scariest night of my life. I... I thought you were dead when I first saw you." His voice cracks and my heart wrenches. "Ronan had thought the same thing. You were covered in ice and weren't moving. I... I have never felt more terror than I did when I saw you like that."

"It feels like I did die that night," I say softly.

Fine stops walking abruptly and grabs me by the shoulders. "Don't say that, Ona. I promise I will do everything in my power so you feel alive." I smile slightly. He didn't understand how badly damaged I was now. Nothing more than a broken doll.

And that's when I see the lake. I gasp and run towards the edge of the water. "It's so clear," I say excitedly. The large stretch of water was a clear blue hue surrounded by a throng of green trees. "This place, it's beautiful, Finineian. Thank you for taking me here."

I look back at Fineian, who sets the backpack down with a wide grin. "I knew you'd love it. We've been coming here for years. We actually chose the location of the house because of its proximity to the lake."

I take off my shoes and dip a toe into the lake. "Hey, it's not too cold," I tell him, inhalation.

Fine laughs. "No, it's always perfect. You should feel it in the summer. Want to go for a swim?"

Nodding, I take off his hoodie, my tank top, and my shorts. I can feel Fineian's gaze on me, but I don't dare to look at him. I step into the lake, thankful for the gradual decline, so I don't have to jump in all at once. When the water is up to my shoulders, I turn back to look at Finine.

"Aren't you going to come in?" I ask when I see that he's still fully clothed.

Looking like he's yanked out of a trance, he shakes his head. "Right. Swimming," he mutters and takes off his shirt. I look away uncomfortably, but the image will be engraved in my memory of Finineian's defined abs. He looks like he was pulled out of ancient Greece.

Finine comes into the lake, and I try not to stare at his body, though I can still see how muscular he is through the clear water. "I squeal as something brushes against my foot. Oh my god, a fish just touched me," I say in panic as I look down and see a few tiny fish.

Fine laughs. "I thought you liked nature, Onixa," he teases me and swims near me. "That includes fish, you know."

I shudder. "They're scary," I mumble and Finineian laughs at my distress. "Uh, I won't let them hurt you, nicks," he coos. And suddenly, I'm being pulled into his arms. Electricity running down my spine at the contact. His eyes widen and I know he feels it too. I struggle out of his arms and he lets me go.

"Race you to the other side?" I say and start swimming to the other side of the lake before he responds.

"Cheater," I hear him laugh, but he starts swimming after me. It feels good to swim in the lake, and I can't believe how free I feel in the water. The sun feels a little warmer on my skin, and I'm surprised when I realize that in a way, Calio was right. There is still some happiness left inside me behind all of the darkness.

I feel my foot get yanked, and I'm pulled backwards. "Hey," I whine as Finineian swims past me and I hear him laugh in between strokes. I swim after him, but he beats me to the other side.

"You're one to talk about cheating," I grumble before ducking under the water and smoothing my hair back as I resurface. Water glistens in Fineian's hair, small drops falling down his face. In the sunlight, his eyes are a beautiful light green like a lime.

"Your eyes," I mumble and can't help myself from reaching out and cupping his face, running my thumb under his eye along his cheekbone. "I thought they were green."

He looks at me strangely. "They are green, Onixa."

I shake my head slightly. "No, I thought they were emerald green, like grass, like Theren's eyes." It's what I don't say, but he seems to know anyway.

"I'm not him, Onixa," he says gently, but his voice is firm. His skin feels like sparks against mine.

"If Gradon had gotten away," I say slowly, "I have to know before I do this. Would you have taken him in, protected him, given him a home?"

He looks at me in confusion. "Of course, I would have. How could you even ask me that, Onixa?"

I smashed my lips against his. Once his shock wore off, he kissed me back with intensity. His hands moved to my legs, and he lifted them, wrapping me around his waist, which was still underwater. His large hands rested on my back, pushing my torso so close to his that I could feel the outline of his abs. My hands moved to his hair, and I slit my tongue in his mouth. He groans slightly, his chest rumbling, and as I kiss him, it feels like he's breathing the life back into me. By the time I pull away, I'm gasping for air, and so is he.

"Listen, Onixa," he starts to say, but I don't want to talk about it. "Race you back to the other side?" I say, and throw myself in the other direction and start swimming.

"Oh my god, what have I done? I just kissed my kidnapper. Or a former kidnapper since I guess technically I came back to him. Was this Stockholm syndrome? If it was, was it really that terrible? The kiss was good. No, more than reasonable. It was perfect. Like everything is with Finineian, but I have a mate or had I guess I couldn't just be throwing myself at random guys who kidnapped me, no matter how godly their bodies are. And his tongue. No, no, no. This is crazy. It had only been 2 weeks since I left the rogue camp and now here I was making out with a guy I really don't know all that well. But you could. My subconscious contradicts me. It's not wrong. Fine had told me everything I wanted to know and didn't hide himself away like Theren. It boils down to me not deserving to be happy with anyone else. It's my fault Gradon died. To be anything but miserable after his death would be wrong on every level. So by the time I reach the other side of the lake, I decide not to let things go any further with Finine. It would be too easy to fall in love with him to be happy, and I don't deserve it. Fine doesn't deserve this."

Of course. Fine beats me to the other side. "Slowpoke," he teases me and pulls me into him. God, his skin feels good. Too good.

"Fine. Listen. I... I begin to say, but he silences me with his lips. And immediately my resolve to stay away from him falls apart. This kiss is even more intense than the last, as if he knows what I was planning on saying.

"Don't think, Onixa," he whispers against my mouth in between kisses. He didn't have to tell me twice. I shove thoughts of the rogue camp out of my brain and focus solely on how good he feels against me. I moan slightly and Fineian growls, his grip on my waist tightening. We kiss until my skin begins to prune up from the water. He groans when I pull away, which makes me laugh.

"We should take a break. My skin looks like my grams," I giggle and try pulling away from him, but his hands are like iron on me.

"I'm finding it exceptionally difficult to let you go," he whispers, his lips on my neck, and I shudder.

"It's pretty simple, actually," I say breathlessly. "You just have to remove your hands, and the rest comes easily." Fine chuckles, but acquiesces and releases his grip. We get out of the lake and sit on the grass until we're dry. I'm grateful he doesn't try to talk about the kiss, because I don't know what I would say. We pull back on our clothes and before we leave, I stare at the lake.

"I like it here," I say to him quietly and his arm wraps around me.

"We can come back whenever you want," he promises. And his face is so happy.

"I smile every day. He laughs every day if it's what will make you smile like that."

"Well, isn't this sweet?" The voice that haunts my nightmares sneers.

Chapter 51.

When I turn around, I see Theren standing with Lyon and 10 of his warriors. Theren's face is completely emotionless in his trademark bored expression. "Good to know you've missed me while you've been gone, mate," he says sardonically. And I can see his magic swirling around him in shades of white and gray.

Fine steps in front of me protectively, and Theren looks at him in disgust. "Let me guess, Finine, savior of the rogues, stealer of women."

"You're not taking her," Theren laughs starkly.

"She's not your mate, pup. She's mine," Fine says lowly.

I step out from behind Fineian. "You killed Gradon," I say contemptuously, and I can feel the darkness begging to be released just like it had that night. "You may be my mate, but I will never go back with you."

The narrows his eyes at me. "Ona, you don't want to do this. You know I can defeat you easily. Do us both a favor and come willingly so I don't hurt you."

My magic swirls around me, dark and deadly. I didn't even want to hold it back. "You can't hurt me ever again. Theren, you know why."

"Do tell Onixa," he purrs and his magic is just as present as mine. Although I know he's only showing it to frighten me, not because he can't control it. My lips curl into a cruel smile because I'm not fighting the darkness anymore. The grass around us instantly darkens and I hold my palms out, letting my magic suffocate all his wolves. Black fog covers them and before they can react, they pass out. At this point, my darkness is in complete control of my actions. Before, it was hard for me to wield it, requiring immense effort and focus. But now, it had a mind of its own.

Theren shields himself with his own magic and looks at his sleeping wolves in shock. "What have you done, Onixa?"

I laugh venomously and drain the life from more trees. And my magic is no longer swirling around me. It's everywhere. I can feel power. So much power coursing through me. I know I could defeat him without even trying.

"Isn't this what you wanted, honey?" I say sweetly, and black mist is coming out of my eyes to relieve the excess amount of power. "You wanted me to use the darkness, and now I am."

Theren sends shards of his magic at me, but the darkness takes care of it so I don't have to. Instantly, dissolving his magic like it was nothing more than smoke. "That's the best you can do, mate," I sneer and throw a ball of dark energy at him. His magic slices through it, and white mist collects around my feet. He's trying to paralyze me. "Not this time," I hiss, and my magic tears at his shield. I use his own move against him, and black mist gathers around him. Just like other knights, he's able to shatter it, but more black magic replaces whatever he breaks, and soon he's too enveloped by it to fight it. He falls to the ground, and he's completely paralyzed. My magic wrapped around him like a cocoon. Unlike his pack members, I don't want him asleep yet. The darkness wants to hurt him first. I'm not sure where it ends and where I begin, but we both want the same thing.

I walk over to Theren, whose eyes are frantic. I crouch down over his body. "What's wrong, Theren?" I coo, reaching my hand out to run a finger along his face. His eyes are terrified, and I relish it. "Don't like having to lay here, completely helpless. Tell me, how does it feel knowing that I could kill all of your men right in front of you, and there's nothing you could do to stop me?" I ease up on the magic blocking his mouth so he can respond.

"Ona, this isn't you," Darren pleads and he sounds pathetic.

I laugh darkly. "I remember me begging for Gradon's life like it was just yesterday. How quickly you forget what you did to me. Perhaps I will start with Leon before the rest of your men. Don't worry, I'll save you for last. I want you to watch as I drain the life from them." He begs for their lives, but I don't care. The darkness wants blood, and so do I. He has to pay for what he's done.

I lean over Leon's sleeping body, lifting him by the collar. "Should I rip out his heart?" I muse, and the darkness yells at me to stop. "A bit brutal for my taste, but you seem to be fond of this method, so perhaps I should give it a try."

"Please, Onixa," he begs. "I'll do anything you want." His words make me chuckle. "History really does repeat itself. You're right. I should rip out his heart. If anything, just to make this day perfectly symmetrical to that night."

"Ona, don't do this," I hear Finine say quietly, and his hand touches my shoulder. The darkness doesn't like it and throws him back, paralyzing him, too. "You don't have to do this, Ona."

"Yes, I do," I hiss and glare at him. "You know what he put me through. I won't be able to sleep at night until he's dead. But first, he will feel the same pain I do." I begin to drain the life from Lyon and it feels good. I block out Theron's protests and knowing I'm hurting him makes this feel so much sweeter. This was the first time I had ever stolen the life force from a person and it felt better than I could have ever imagined. The magic was sweeter, darker, and I liked it more than that. I needed it.

"On... Finineian," says softly, so soft it catches my attention. "I love you."

I stop draining Leon and whip my head around to look at Fineian. "What?" I ask, confused by his gentle words. The darkness is angry. It wants me to kill Finine right after I drain the energy from Lyon and Theren. But Fineian's words press pause on my pursuit of death and destruction.

"I love you, Ona. Please don't kill him. You won't be able to live with yourself if you do, and I can't live without you." His voice is calm, gentle.

"I... I shake my head trying to clear my thoughts. The darkness is pushing me to kill Leon. My mind feels foggy. No, I have to kill him. It's the only way I stop hurting."

"The pain won't go away if you kill him. Ona, it'll get worse. Killing him won't bring Gradon back. Just let go of the darkness. Okay, you're not thinking clearly," he coaxes me. "Look at Leon. Okay, Onixa. You don't want to hurt someone innocent." I look down at Lyon and he's barely breathing.

"Oh my god," I whisper, horrified. "The darkness dissipates around me." I release Fine, but Theren and his men are still trapped. "What have I done?"

Fine rushes over to me and pulls me into his arms. "Ona, my love, I need you to stay with me, okay? Use your magic to heal him, okay? Everything will be all right. I just need you to stay with me." Fineian lets me go and I lean over Lyon, willing my magic to heal him. Darkness swirls around him, but this time it's gentle. I hear him snore and I exhale in relief.

"I could have killed him," I choke out, mortified.

"Onixa, let me go," The calls out calmly. "Let's talk about this."

"Shut up," I yell back and paralyze his mouth. "If I hear him say one more word, the darkness will come back. And this time, I won't be able to hold it back. Maybe I should succumb to it. Let it kill him so I don't have to." He didn't have the darkness coursing through his blood when he killed Gradon. That was all him. All my mates.

Finian takes out his phone and calls someone. "Dean, come to the lake right away. Bring the others." He hangs up and I go over to Theren and lean over him. His eyes are resigned, defeated.

"I should kill you for what you did to Gray," I say lowly, and his eyes widen slightly. "If I was stronger, I would. I hope one day someone hurts you as badly as you hurt me. And I really should have killed him. Whatever stupid phrase they say about revenge being wrong is just that wrong. There would be no greater justice than to avenge my friend." I wave my hand over his face and he goes to sleep with the rest of his men. Before he does, his eyes are defeated, resigned, scared. I never thought I'd see the day an alpha coward in terror for me.

"What now?" I ask Fineian as I get up and stand next to him, looking at all of the bodies sleeping. My magic is still active in them, and more patches of grass die to keep it that way.

"Dean will come and erase their memories," he answers, and my eyebrows raise. "It's his gift. He can moderate memories. He doesn't use it often, but I think this is a suitable enough occasion."

"He did it to me the first time you took me, didn't he?" I ask quietly, and he hesitates before nodding. I should be mad, but I don't feel anything besides loathing for myself.

"I would have killed him if he didn't stop me," I state, my stomach turning. "I would have killed them all." I start crying, and Fineian pulls me into his arms. "Sure, it's okay, Onixa. Everything will be okay." Sobs rack my body and Finineian rubs my back soothingly until the others arrive.

"Holy heck, what the hell happened here?" Dean asks and I wse.

"I need you to go through their memories and wipe what happened here. Alter it so that they think they didn't find the cabin and decided to camp out here for the night," Fine instructs Dean, who looks bewildered. "That could take a while. How long until they wake up?" he asks.

Fine looks to me and I nod. "They'll stay asleep for as long as you need," Fineian tells him, and he sits next to the closest wolf, putting his hands on their head and closing his eyes.

Ronin, Kalia, Astra, and Willis walk over to Finine and me. "What happened?" Ronin asks quietly, and I cringe.

"Theren and his men showed up. He came for Onixa, and she stopped them," he says, neglecting to mention that I almost killed all of them.

Ronin nods. "Are there any I should check for injuries?"

"The one over there," I say and point to Leon. "I think I healed him, but..." my voice trails off in guilt.

Ronin smiles kindly. "I'll go take a look. It's no problem." He and Willis walk over to Leon, talking too quietly for me to hear them.

"Fine, go with them," Astra commands. Fine hesitates, looking at me conflicted. "She's fine," Astra says impatiently. "I'll look after her. Go." Finian nods once and goes over to Willis and Ronin.

"What happened, Onixa?" Astra asks quietly once he's gone.

"I almost killed them all," I admit shamefully. "Finian. He stopped me. It was almost too late."

Kalia shrugs. "You should have just killed them. It's not like Theren doesn't deserve it for what he did to you." My mouth drops open as Astra nods. "They don't deserve your kindness, Onixa."

I shake my head. "Theren doesn't. The others are innocent. I can't punish them for what Theren did."

"You feel guilty," Kalia says suddenly. "You regret hurting them." I nod and my eyes fill with tears.

"Oh, Nyx," Kalia says sympathetically, and pulls me in for a hug. "Don't feel guilty. Nobody died. They'll go back to Blue Moon tonight, none the wiser, about what happened. No damage done." She pauses. "You're scared. Why are you scared? Onixa, we'll protect you. No one will ever hurt you."

"It's not me I'm scared for," I say as I pull away. "You don't get it. I lost control. I could have murdered 12 people. Even worse, I wanted to if Fineian didn't stop me, but he did."

Astra interrupts. "So, let..."

It go. You can't beat yourself up for this. The put you through something traumatic. Your response to seeing him was completely understandable. Nobody blames you for it. Not Fineian, not me, nobody. I don't believe her. Fine probably hated me for what he saw. There's no doubt in my mind that I terrified him. He was good, pure, all the things I am not. I'm glad you got to confront him, Astra says to me, her voice tur. Not everyone is lucky enough to confront their demons like that. But she was wrong. My demon isn't The me.

Chapter 52.

All right, their memories are gone. When they wake up, they won't remember what happened, Dean says. And by now, the sun has long passed, leaving us in the blackness of the night. "I'm glad he finished because doing magic for that long had drained me of energy, not to mention that it was starting to give me a headache. I stopped siphoning energy, and my ears are ringing slightly. I had never used that much magic before. The darkness had abandoned me. As soon as I made the decision not to kill Theren or his men, it was gone. It felt alive, like it was responding to my emotions, or at least fueled by them. And as soon as Finine snapped me out of the trance, it was like he scared it away. Could this be what the seer meant? Only one will keep the darkness away, she had told me. Did that mean Theren would bring out the worst in me? The more I thought about it, the more I realized how right the seer may have been. Both times the darkness took control. It was with Theren. It went away because of Fineian. No, that couldn't be because she said two mates and only one would keep the darkness away. If I admit that Finineian is the one keeping it away, then I would also have to admit that he's my mate, which is not an option.

I groan, stumbling as I clutch my head, which is now dripping in sweat. Fine grabs my shoulders with both hands to study me. Can you walk? Fineian asks gently, searching my face in concern. I'm fine, I assure him, and he hesitantly removes his hands. But when I take a step forward, my legs wobble, and in one smooth movement, he sweeps me up into his arms. "Please don't argue," he says quietly as he follows behind the others as they head back to the cabin. "You're weak right now. Just let me take care of you." I nod because I'm not up for arguing, you know, since I almost just hurt a dozen people. I shudder. I'm just as bad as Theren. You're not like him, Finineian says suddenly, and I jump slightly in his arms, but they just tighten more. Can you read my mind? I ask in horror. I don't think I had spoken out loud. Fine laughs. What? You can read my mind. That's not fair. I tell him. I can't read yours. He laughs again. No, Onixa. I can't read your mind. Your face is like an open book. He hesitates, his brilliant smile faltering. When you think of him, you get a certain look. Like, you're terrified. I am like him. You know, I tell him lowly, so the others can't hear us, even though they're far ahead. I would have hurt them. I wanted to hurt them. Hurt people hurt people, Onixa. You hurt them, you healed them. There's no reason to dwell on it, he says, and gently kisses my forehead. But I'd wait a while before doing it again. Dean definitely will want to call in a few favors for this. I smile half-heartedly, and Finine continues walking us back to the house in silence. I feel insanely guilty for all of the havoc I have wreaked on these poor rogues who had been nothing but pleasant to them. I resolved to try to make it up to them, though I had no idea how I would go about doing that. I especially felt guilty about Dean, who looked extremely pale and weak after spending hours combing through their minds. Maybe I could convince Ronin to let him have access to the garden again, though I doubted he would go for it.

When we get back to the house, Fineian places me on the bed and runs a bath for me. "You should get some sleep once you're done with your bath," he says gently and kisses my forehead softly. "Good night, Onixa." He leaves the room, and as I take the bath, I close my eyes, but all I see is Leyon dying in my arms. No, Leon is being hurt by me in my arms. As much as I wanted to believe Finineian and that we were mates, it was just impossible to think, especially after tonight, it was no wonder the moon goddess had paired me with Thein. We had the same darkness. He didn't bother trying to control it. But Fineian had kept the darkness away. So, what if the seer was correct and there was one person who would keep it darkness at bay? I meant it when I told Fineian I wouldn't ever be able to love someone like that. I gasp, sitting upright as I recall something else the seer had told me. There is dust. Fine's gift was the ability to turn things into dust. When she said there was dust, could that have been in reference to Finineian? And was he part of whatever bizarre prophecy she described? I tried to recall the other thing she had said, something about a sun chasing after the moon. If Fineian was the dust, who were the sun and the moon? I wondered if that could be in reference to the and me with my dark magic and his light magic. But the prophecy also described a white wolf, and I couldn't recall seeing any wolf with white fur, though I also didn't know very many wolves to begin with. Three deaths, one rebirth. Gradon was one of the deaths, which meant there were two more people left to die, and my heart twisted at the idea of being faced with any more loss. When the water is cold, I get out and dry off wearing one of Finine's oversized shirts to bed. Before I go to sleep, I vow not to let anyone else die, regardless of what the prophecy states. Then I hadn't known that the prophecy and the fate of the wolves were already set in stone.

Fine. And I look over the lake, and I shiver as a gust of wind hits my flesh, still slightly wet from swimming, making the wind feel all the colder. Vine wraps his arms around me and I instantly feel warmer from his heat. "Thank you," I say with a smile, and he returns one of his own, and his gorgeousness nearly knocks the wind out of me. "I don't think I would ever get used to how beautiful he is." "Anything for you, my love," he says, and gently places a single chased kiss on my lips. "There is nothing in the world I wouldn't do for you." I throw my arms around him and kiss him so deeply that my brain feels like it's melting and the world around us collapses and all I think is him. Finley, the brightest light in my dark, dark world. Isn't this sweet? I hear Theren's voice sneeren is a foot away and his eyes are completely blink. The I I begin to say, but he cuts me off. He laughs coldly. You're what, Onixa? Uh, only someone like you would move on that quickly, you know. My eyes brim with tears and I'm paralyzed as Theren takes a step closer and leans over Finine, who's looking at me in terror. Ona, don't let him harm me. He pleads as Theron's hand rests over his chest. I want to stop him, but my magic has abandoned me, and I can't even reassure Fine or beg Theen to stop as my throat squeezes closed. She couldn't stop me from harming the first rogue. The says surprisingly gently to Finine, who flinches. She can't stop me from harming you either. And he shoves his hand through his chest, and Fineian's light is extinguished.

I wake up, gasping for air. I move my fingers to confirm that I'm not paralyzed and that it was just a dream. I have to check if Fineian is okay. I get out from under the covers, and cool air hits my skin. As I go to the door, I hesitate as my fist hovers a few inches away from Fineian's door in the room he was sleeping in across the hall. I didn't want to wake him up, but the dream felt so real. I had to check to make sure he was still alive. I knocked twice on his door, hoping he won't be too mad at me for waking him up. Though I suppose it wouldn't matter if he were already gone and Theren had gotten to him. I don't hear anything for a moment and immediately assume the worst. Oh my god. There must have been an issue with wiping Theren's memory. And he must have come here and found Finine. He could still be here. He could. The door opens, revealing a sleepy Finineian whose light brown hair is slightly messy and his eyes are partially closed, not yet fully open. He's only wearing a pair of boxers. Onixa? He asks in confusion, his voice raspy, and it makes my stomach flutter. Are you okay? Relief floods my body and I throw my arms around him. He stiffens in surprise before wrapping his large arms around me. You're alive, I choke out and tears fall from my eyes. He pulls away, looking at my face quizzically. Should I not be? He asks in confusion. I had a nightmare. Therein he my voice fades into nothing as I recall the way he tore out Fineian's heart just as he had done to Gradon. Fineian's eyes soften and he runs his thumb along my cheek, wiping away the tears. Don't cry, Onixa. I'm fine. It was just a nightmare. You're fine. He reassures me, pulling me in tighter and holding me closer. Sorry for waking you up. I apologize after a few moments of crying quietly in his arms and pull away once more to look at his face to really make sure that he was real and alive. I don't mind, he says, and with his following words, his voice lowers. You're always welcome to come to me, no matter the time. Involuntarily, goosebumps rise on my skin under the intensity of his gaze, and I'm at a loss for words. Let's get you back to bed, he says, taking my hand in his, and he walks us back to my room. No, his room that I stole from him. Oh, God, I have destroyed this man's life. He opens up the covers and once I'm inside, he places them over me, running his thumbs once more under my eyes to wipe the tears away. "You don't have to be scared," he says softly, and his eyes look unbearably sad. "No one will hurt you here." "It's not me I'm worried about," I say quietly, my heart-wrenching at the thought of losing him. "He couldn't be one of the wolves in the prophecy. He just couldn't." He smiles slightly. "No one will hurt me either, Onixa. I can take care of myself and you too. I would never understand his desire to take care of me, but it was growing increasingly difficult to resist. There's something impossibly addictive about having someone care for you so deeply. Someone who makes you feel like you're the only thing that matters. He turns to leave and when he's at the door, I can't stop myself from saying, "Wait." Fine turns back around and looks at me in concern. Do you not want to stay here? I can give you another room if you'd feel safer there, he offers. I shake my head slowly. I want to stay here, but I hesitate. His eyebrows furrow. What do you need, Onixa? He asks gently. You only have to ask. I'll give you whatever it is you desire. Can you stay with me? I blurt out. His eyes widen in surprise. You want me to stay here tonight? I can't believe I just asked that. I nod. You don't have to if you don't want to, I quickly say. I know it's super inconvenient, but I don't know. I just can't be alone right now. I don't want to be alone. I say the last part quietly. Fine nods in understanding. You're never an inconvenience, O Nixa. I don't mind at all. Whatever it takes, he assures me and walks over to a chair in the corner of the room and takes a seat. I frown. You can't sleep in a chair. He rolls his eyes and grins. Don't worry about me. Go to sleep. You still need to rest more. I try to fall asleep, but I end up tossing and turning for a few minutes. Too guilty to sleep. Finian, are you awake? I whisper. He laughs. Yes, Onixa. And he shouldn't be. Go to sleep. Do you want to come sleep in the bed? I have no idea how I was bold enough to ask that. He's quiet for a few moments before answering. You don't have to offer that, Onixa. I promise the chair is fine. I want you to. Oh my god, what am I saying? Once more. There's a silence and my heart pounds in my chest. Fine, he agrees. But only if you promise to keep your hands to yourself, he jokes and I laugh slightly, though my heart beats faster when he walks to the edge of the bed. He doesn't get under the covers and lies on top of them, crossing his arms over his chest and closing his eyes. "Won't you be cold without a blanket?" I ask, still feeling guilty for burdening him. He doesn't open his eyes as he responds. Go to bed, Onixa. I do as he says, and it's the most restful sleep I have ever had.

Chapter 53.

I wake up in pure horror. Well, that's not precisely true. Let me back up. When I first woke up, I was warm and not alone. Not only was I sharing the bed with Fineian, I was sharing the bed with Fineian. My head was lying on his chest, my arm draped around his torso, and my legs were tangled in his. So now you see why my morning begins in horror. Given the situation, one could understand my paralysis, and therefore my inability to untangle myself from a very warm, very kind Finley. His eyes were closed as I stared at him, and once again, I marveled at his sheer beauty unlike anything I had ever seen before. His face was perfectly chiseled, as was the rest of him. His hair was adorably messy with slightly curled ends. One strand was separated from the others, curling on his forehead. Before I think it through, I reached my hand up to put the strand of hair with the others. Fine catches my wrist with his hand, his eyes still closed. It's considered rude to stare, you know, he says with a smile. I jump, startled that he was awake. Oh, um, well, it's just that there's a piece of your hair on your forehead, separated from the others, and it shouldn't be away from its friends. It could have gotten lonely, you know. I nervously ramble, suddenly very conscious of the fact that I'm only wearing one of his shirts and a pair of panties. He chuckles lowly. Can't have that, can we? He agrees, and I shiver even though I'm uncomfortably warm. He still hasn't let go of my wrist, so I tug it away. I'll just um be taking this back now, I say nervously, and he finally releases his grip and opens his eyes. Dark, long eyelashes frame his eyes, and I'm amazed by how green they are, like spring. And then I remember that my limbs are intertwined with his. I scramble to untangle myself, my cheeks flushing as I tug the shirt down since it was previously hitched up to my waist. "Where's my apology?" Fine asks suddenly. I freeze on the side of the bed, his words stopping me from bolting to hide in the bathroom. What? His eyes are glowing with mischief, and his smile remains painstakingly beautiful. Well, for one, you promise to keep your hands to yourself. My face burns even hotter, and I'm sure I look like a tomato. Secondly, your snoring kept me up the whole night. He teases with a laugh, and I hit him with a pillow. I do not snore, I say defensively, but I can't help giggling. He seems so happy. It was infectious. He puts the pillow I hit him with behind his head, propping him up, and I try not to stare at his bare chest. "You're right," he says lowly. I must have been distracted by something else. His gaze lowers to my exposed leg, and I blurt out. I have to go to the bathroom, he laughs. Luckily, I thought of that when building this place and put in a bathroom or two. I groan in embarrassment before scurrying into the bathroom, and I can hear Finn and laughing from the bedroom. My suspicions were confirmed when I looked in the mirror, and my face was pink. My curly hair is even more untamed than usual, and I cringe as I realize that Finineian has seen me like this. Not that I care, obviously. I attempt to control my hair and brush my teeth before heading back into the room. Finian is looking out the window when I come out. It's a nice day outside, he notes, turning back to look at me. We could go for a walk. Not a good idea based on my last experience outside. I don't think so. I decline his offer. He won't come back, you know. Fine says gently. You don't know that. You can't stay in here forever. Can too. Cannot. I throw my arms up in frustration. Fine, one walk. And you're annoying, by the way. I pout and he chuckles as he walks up to me. Not nearly as annoying as you hugging the bed. He teases and tweaks my nose. I'll meet you downstairs. Okay. I nod and he kisses my forehead before leaving the room, shutting the door behind him.

Today I feel happy light like air. After getting dressed, I go downstairs where Kalia, Astra, Dean, and Willis are whispering conspiratorally. Dean and Kalia grin in evil unison as they look up at me. "Well, well, well, look who it is," Dean says and wiggles his eyebrows. "You know," Kalia told me the craziest thing. "Oh no," Kalia punches Dean. "I told you not to say anything." "What? We all would have found out eventually anyways." Dean whispers like I can't hear him. Nothing happened. Finian suddenly appears behind me, placing his hand on my lower back. Stop gossiping like school girls and eat your damn food. Astra and Willis chuckle as they eat a bite of their cereal. Dean scowls. I can't believe you kept this from me. Fine. I thought we were besties. Fine sigh. Dean for the last time shut up. Where's the better brother? he asks, turning to Kalia. Your words hurt, Finnegan, Dean says, waving his spoon. I thought it was Finley, I whisper to Finineian in confusion. Kalia interjects. Oh, it is. Dean only has two brain cells, though, and they very rarely interact. Ro is in the garden. Something about a chrysanthemum crisis. I'm surprised you can say a word with more than two syllables in it. Cal Dean snorts. We should go before they start throwing food. Fineian whispers to me and I nod in agreement. Once we're out of the house, Fineian apologizes. Sorry, Kalia saw me coming out of your room. I should have known she would blow it out of proportion. I kick a rock out of the trail path. It's fine. It's just Dean being Dean. I smile. It's hard to be mad at him. He was the first one to make me smile after Gray's death. Not to mention, he completely fixed the problem from yesterday. You seem okay today, Fineian says hesitantly. Everything all right? I know things happened yesterday that were not expected. Just making sure you're holding up okay. I smile at his nervousness in approaching the topic and his concern for me was heartwarming. I'm fine. Things they aren't so bad here after all. I don't think many people get to go on walks. I joke and nudge him with my shoulders. You're never going to let me live that down, are you? He laughs and takes his hand in mine. No, actually, I plan on, I start to say. But here's something to our right. Oh my god, he found us. I whisper in horror. Fine squeezes my hand. Just stay next to me. Okay. I'm sure it's nothing. We stay in place. Hello. Fine calls out. Is there someone out here? Fine. That's how every horror movie starts. I whisper. You shouldn't let the stranger know your location. Fineian laughs surprisingly at ease. Don't worry, my love. I won't let anything happen to you. I roll my eyes and I hear more leaves crunch. I can't believe this is how it ends, I whisper. I didn't even get to. A man steps out from a tree, probably only a few years older than me with dark blonde curly hair. He has dirt smudges on his face and his clothes are worn in some places, revealing holes. He holds his hands up. I don't want any problems, he says slowly, like he's anticipating us attacking. I didn't know this land was already claimed, I swear. What's your name? Fine asks gently, his eyes shining. The man hesitates before answering. I'm Hudson. Fine smiles, disarmingly kind. His gentle nature never ceases to leave me dumbfounded. Well, Hudson, you look like you're in desperate need of a good night's sleep and a shower, he adds on. How long have you been on the run? Hudson looked stunned. Um, I'm not sure. A few months, maybe. The last place I was living, a nearby pack took the land. I haven't been in one place for long since that. A look of pain flashes on his face as he mentions his former home. I wondered if it was the house he had grown up in, just ripped away from him by a greedy alpha. Come back to our home with us, Hudson. Fine. Offers. We have plenty of rooms. We host dozens of rogues at any given moment. We offer them a home, a permanent home. You'd be welcome to stay as long or as little as you'd like. He narrows his eyes in suspicion. What's the catch? No catch. You can come by, see if you like it, stay if you do, leave if you don't. If you stay, you can come and go as you please. The only rule is that you can't harm anyone while you're there. Not the rogues in the house. Not any rogues you may come across in the future. Fine explains. Hudson looks at Fineian in disbelief. Are you serious? You don't even know me. Fine shrugs. Our home was founded on the knowledge that not all rogues are bad and with the goal of helping those in need. You're in need of a home. Let us help you. Hudson's eyes are wide. Even though he's undoubtedly older than me, he looks like a small child. lost, scared, but hopeful. I don't know what to say, he says quietly. "Say yes," Fineian smiles, the corners of his eyes crinkling. Hudson nods slowly. "Okay, I guess there's no harm in checking it out." Fine looks elated as Hudson walks towards us and we head back to the house. "Sorry, what's your name?" Hudson asks nervously. "I'm Fineian." "This is Onixa," Finine says, squeezing my hand. I wave shily to the rogue. Fine chats excitedly with Hudson for the remainder of the short walk, looking incredibly animated as he describes the house. Hudson looks at him in wonder the whole time, like he can't believe he's real. Sometimes I can't believe it either. We reach the house and Hudson says, "I don't see anything." Fine grins. Look again. Hudson's mouth drops as he looks at the enormous house. Wow, you weren't kidding about the extra rooms. Fine laughs. No, we definitely have more than a few to spare. Luckily for Hudson, Calia and Dean are nowhere to be seen, saving him from witnessing one of their volatile and childish interactions. Fine gives him a tour while Hudson marvels at the home. Fine goes into our hallway and opens up a door a few rooms away from ours. You can have this room if you want to stay, Fineian says, looking at Hudson hopefully. And I realized then that Finineian wants these rogues to find him. He has the compulsive need to help them. It goes beyond just offering a place to stay. He offers them a home, another chance at life. My chest tightens. Hudson looks at the room, sits on the bed, and looks at Fineian completely bewildered. I I don't know how to thank you. Hudson chokes out emotionally. Fine grins, and his smile could light up the universe. No thanks necessary. I'll bring you by some clothes. We can take you to buy new things once you're settled in. There's toiletries and fresh towels in the bathroom. I'll put some clothes on your bed for you before you get out. Hudson looks completely stunned. I think I see him pinching himself. It's so good to have you here, Hudson. Finian says genuinely, and we leave the room, closing the door behind us. Fine goes back to his room and I follow him. He rummages through his drawers, pulling out all kinds of articles of clothing. You're giving him your clothes, I ask in surprise. He shrugs. Of course, they can be easily replaced. My heart swells, and I look at him like I'm truly seeing him for the first time. His kindness is not a mask. It's him. Why are you looking at me like that? Fine asks in amusement. If this is about the hoodies, I promise I have plenty left for you to commandeer. I laugh when he winks at me. It's not that. It's just the way you are with people. I like it. I like it a lot. I struggled to find the words, but there are no words that can express how great it is what he does for these people. And how about the way I am with you, Ona? He asks softly, setting the pile of clothes on the bed and taking my hands in his. My heartbeat quickens. I like that too. And this time when he kisses me, the is the last thing on my mind.

Chapter 54.

Vine eventually pulls away and I groan as he does so. He feels good, too good, too comforting. With the undoubtedly passion when we would kiss, but there was something missing. Whatever it was, I had it with Fineian. Fine laughs at my slight noise of protest and places a gentle kiss on my nose. I have to go give Hudson the clothes and talk to him a little more. Why don't you go get something to eat and go to the movie room? I can meet you in there soon, he suggests. I sigh. I should go help Ronin with his flower crisis. I can only imagine how stressed out he is right now. I giggle, accustomed by now to his quirks. Fine nods, the corner of his mouth turning up in amusement. Whatever you do, just don't make it worse. I'd hate for you to end up looking like Dean," he jokes, kissing me swiftly one more time before leaving his room. Once he leaves, it takes me a moment to clear my head. Finian is thoroughly intoxicating, and the more I wanted him, the more it scared me. The more I got to know him, the more I liked what I saw. And it was terrifying to feel that way about someone who isn't my mate. Something is seriously wrong with me. I go out back to the garden where I find Ronin kneeling over the patch of chrysanthemums, swearing under his breath. Need some help? I offer, sitting next to him. He jumps slightly at my sudden arrival and then exhales in relief. Onixa, thank the goddess you're here. Can you help me uproot them and spread them out? I planted them too close together and they're starting to block each other and die. It's a disaster of epic proportions, he groans, wiping sweat from his forehead with the back of his glove. Of course, this is a very important matter, I say seriously, trying to hold back my laughter. He did have gardening shears next to him, and Finineian had warned me about ending up like Dean. For a few minutes, we uproot the plants in silence, careful not to break off any of the roots. How are you doing today? Ronin breaks the silence to ask. I shrug, reaching for a spray bottle to loosen up the soil. Fine, Finineian. And I found a rogue, I say excitedly, remembering how happy Hudson was to have a home finally. He decided to stay. Fine is with him right now. Ronin grins. That's good. Fine smiles non-stop for days. Whenever he finds a rogue, not even Cal and Dean can piss him off for a good week or so. Laughing, I begin to replant one of the flowers. Yeah, he definitely was in a good mood. You smell like him, Ronin observes. My head snaps up to look at him. One corner of his mouth is slightly turned upward, and he gives me a knowing look. I groan, but I can't help my face from blushing. It I didn't. I struggle to defend myself. Ronin laughs. It's okay, Nyx. I won't hound you for details, though. You should probably have a better response prepared for when Kalia and Dean ask you about it. and they will ask," he warns. I groan, knowing he's right. Whatever was going on with Fineian, I had to figure out what the hell I'm doing before it gets too complicated. Do you like him? Ronin asks hesitantly. "I know what he's really asking, but I decide to feain ignorance." "Yeah, he's really nice," I say lightly, like I'm talking about an acquaintance. Ronin size, pausing from separating the roots to look at me. "You know what I mean, Onixa?" I consider his question. Do I like Finian? It wasn't too long ago that I told him I wouldn't ever be able to feel that way about anyone. But that was before the lake. Before I saw him with the rogue. Everything is different now. I'm different now. Yeah, I say quietly. I really do.

Once the monumental chrosanthemum crisis is solved, I go inside, seeking out Fineian's room so I can shower the dirt and sweat off of me. I eventually find the hallway and crash into someone as I turn the corner. Oh god, I'm so sorry. Hudson apologizes and I almost don't recognize him. There's no more dirt on his face and his blonde curls are now smoother. Oh, hey. I met you already. You're Fineian's mate, right? I blink twice. Um, I begin. Not really sure what to say to that. It's complicated. I decide on it and it sounds more like a question. His eyes widened slightly. Oh, sorry. I mean, I just assumed because you guys were holding hands and you know, because he talks about you non-stop. I can't stop a small smile tugging on my lips at that. How are you settling in? I ask him, changing the subject. Hudson's eyes fill with emotion. I can't thank you and Finineian enough. It's all Finine, I tell him honestly. Speaking of, do you know where he is? I ask curiously. Hudson nods. He asked me what my favorite foods were. Said he was going to go get groceries. I mean, seriously, how much nicer can this dude get? I laugh and something tugs on my heartstrings at his words. He would go grocery shopping to get Rogue's favorite foods. It's just so Finian. All right. Well, I have to go clean up. Do you need help finding anything? I offer, and he shakes his head. Fine gave me directions on how to get to the home theater. These hallways are pretty freaking confusing. I don't know how anyone manages to get around, he says. And I was inclined to agree. After telling him to let me know if he needs anything, I go into Finian's room and take a shower. Even though he gave me my own toiletries, I use his body wash, letting the smell of him comfort me. What? It smells good. I wrap a clean towel around me once I'm done and step out of the steam fil. I squeal in surprise when I see Fineian lying on the bed. His green eyes are wide and I'm suddenly very, very aware of the fact that I'm only in a towel. "You were supposed to be gone," I say in panic, pulling the towel tighter around me. Vine's eyes darken and my heart pounds furiously in my chest. He takes a deep breath, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment before reopening them. He gets up from the bed, taking slow steps towards me, and my breathing halts. He puts both of his hands on either side of my face and leans down. "Are you trying to torture me, Onxa?" he asks slowly. My eyes widen, and I remember that I used his soap. "Um, well, torture is a bit harsh of a word. I actually think that I just Finnian suddenly leans over, pressing his lips to mine, and I immediately kiss him back out of instinct, or maybe even just simple desire. This kiss isn't as gentle as the one we shared after finding Hudson. It's passionate, desperate. He wants me as much as I like him. Without thinking, I raise my arms to put them around his neck, forgetting about the towel until it starts to slip down. Finine catches it with one hand to hold it from falling and pulls his lips away from mine. His eyes are dark and his lips are swollen as I imagine mine are as well. Get dressed, he commands, his voice strained. I replace his hand with mine to hold up the towel, and he quickly leaves the room, leaving me gasping for air.

For the next week, Finian and I will start off sleeping in separate rooms. But around midnight, I always end up going to his room and crawling into bed next to him. The only way I found I can have a peaceful rest. Every morning, I wake up in his arms, and he always jokingly demands an apology for breaking my promise. During the day, I spend my time gardening with Ronin, watching movies with Hudson and sometimes the others, and reading in the library with Fineian, which is what I'm doing right now. How come you're here right now? I ask Finineian suddenly. He looks up from the book he's reading and blinks. H I mean, don't you have better things to do than sit here reading with me all day? I ask curiously, like, I don't know, paperwork or something. He raises his eyebrows, and I instantly know how ridiculous it sounds. Of course, he doesn't. I'm quite satisfied with spending my time with you, Onixa, he says, and his mouth quirks to the side in amusement. But thank you for your concern. My cheeks burn as we go back to reading our books in a comfortable silence. And later I finish the book, Weathering Heights. Well, that was depressing, I say as I close the book. Didn't like it, Fineian murmurs, glancing down at me. He's sitting in an armchair while I'm sprawled on the floor next to his chair. He always teased me for reading in uncomfortable positions, but in my opinion, it makes the book better. No, I like it. It's still depressing though, I tell him, sitting up. He laughs, closing his own book after folding the ear of one of the corners. I think it's meant to be romantic. I scoff, getting up to stretch my legs. Not much romantic about that. It's tragic, more like. Fine chuckles and pulls me into his lap. I'll remember to give you a happier book next time, one with a happy ending. Very kind of you, I laugh, leaning closer into him as his arms wrap tighter around me. My insides feel warm, mushy, and they have for the last week. It scared me, and I suddenly am reminded of the words he told me by the lake when I was in the middle of being consumed by the darkness. "Did you mean it?" I ask hesitantly, "What you said that day by the lake?" Fine's eyes flash in recognition. "You're asking if I love you," he states. I nod, feeling my stomach twist nervously. I do, he confirms, his face uncharacteristically serious. I'm not ready to say it back, but he seems to understand that and leans in and kisses me sweetly, gently. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same. He whispers against my mouth, and I recognize the quote from the book I just read. He had an affinity for quoting books, his mindabsorbing words like a sponge, making him incredibly fascinating to me because I have the memory of a carrot. I pull my lips away from his. Why do you think we're mates? I ask him, not to be cruel, but out of genuine curiosity. I hadn't asked him that since he kidnapped me, and he wouldn't tell me. Perhaps now he would. His eyes darken. You really want to know? I nod. Then I'll tell you everything.

Chapter 55.

Fine in size and stands up, still holding me in his arms. He sets me down in the chair and sits across from me. His unwillingness to hold me while he says this, as well as the somber look on his face, makes my stomach turn over with anxiety. I'll start from the beginning, he begins, clasping his hands together and twiddling his thumbs nervously. I had a dream one night about four months ago. Immediately, I knew it wasn't unlike any other dream. Despite being asleep, I was fully conscious. And then she appeared to me in the distorted dreamlike state. The moon goddess. He pauses, gauging my reaction, but I have none besides confusion. Strangely enough, I didn't doubt him. Not only did I firmly believe that Fineian wouldn't lie to me, but my Grams had told me that she could contact those who were moon blessed. And if anyone would be moon blessed, it would undoubtedly be Finine. At first, I was skeptical. But she knew things, things about me that would be otherwise impossible to understand. And so when she made her request, I had no choice but to listen. After all, she is my goddess, and to refuse her would be blasphemous. She told me that she had essential information regarding my mate, but that she couldn't stay in my dream for much longer, that she was weakened. She told me that to learn the information I would have to kidnap someone. I inhale sharply and Finnian winces. He was talking about me. The moon goddess has requested that he take me. Why? Obviously, she was talking about you. She described a girl with pale skin, raven hair, and eyes the color of the ocean. She warned me that you would be hard to take because the alpha of blue moon believed you to be his mate. But I am Theren's mate. Nothing makes sense anymore. I'm sure the dubious look on my face shows my confusion. And so for a few weeks, I lurked on the outskirts of Blue Moon looking for the girl. And then one day, I saw you. You were upset clearly, and I felt guilty when I had to subdue you. But I had seen your power in the forest while you were attacking blue moon guards who tried to stop you from leaving. And the moon goddess warned me that you would not come willingly. And so I knocked you out. Fine winces at this like the memory caused him pain. But you didn't pass out right away. I caught you in my arms and I felt sparks. I didn't think at that time you were my mate because my wolf didn't recognize you. But then you reached out like you were in a trance and stroked my face. You called me pretty. He smiled slightly at the memory though he looks a little green. All I could do was promise you that this next part wouldn't hurt because I knew that Dean would wipe your memory. And so I carried you here. But the whole time I couldn't stop staring at your sleeping face, worried about the injury on your head, the one I caused. But the moon goddess assured me that your pain would be temporary, that all of this was for the greater good. And when you woke up, I began the next step that the moon goddess commanded. She told me that you had to summon her using your gift. You thought I was crazy, obviously, because I took you and then wanted you to summon a god. You asked why the hottest guys are always the craziest. He laughs slightly, but I have no idea what he's talking about. This never happened. I had to threaten you. He cringes. To get you to summon her, I said horrible things that I didn't mean because I needed you to use your magic to summon the moon goddess so we could talk. And so you did as I said, and I will never forgive myself for the fear in your eyes when you looked at me. But you summoned her, and when she appeared, we were both in shock. I wasn't fully convinced at the time that I wasn't crazy, and you weren't either, rightfully so. And the moon goddess began to tell us everything. She told us that there is an enemy, another god, conspiring against her. That the other god, Helios, she called him, wanted her dead, and planned on using you as a weapon against him. To do that, he manipulated your mate, Bond, and gave it to The Alpha who doesn't worship the moon goddess and would do anything for power. She told us that we are true mates and faded to save her from Helios. And you accused me of somehow tricking you of showing you a hallucination of some kind. You really believe the and you were mates. But then the moon goddess told you stories of your grams, told you about the bedtime stories she would say to you at night. And then completely horrified, you believed her. And so did I. The moon goddess explained that part of a prophecy predicting her death had not yet happened and that we needed to stop it. The only way to do that, she said, was for you to transfer your magic to me. Nothing about what he's saying makes sense. This never happened. I can't transfer my magic to anyone, I say in confusion. There's much more I could have said, could have questioned, but that's the easiest lie to call him out on. He shakes his head. You can if it is voluntary. The moon goddess gave us a ritual to do that would transfer your power to me. She assured that it could always be undone and that when the time was right, it could be undone. She told us that for the next part of the prophecy, it was vital that you didn't have your gift. I could see how much it hurt you, the idea of losing it, but we both knew how necessary the sacrifice was to ensuring that the moon goddess would not fall victim to Helios. And so you transferred your gift to me and the moon goddess made the shocking order to make you go back to blue moon. She said it was essential to her plan that you and the continue with your lives, believing that the two of you were meant to be together, but you didn't want to leave. I didn't want you to leave. We had just discovered we were mates and the moon goddess was now instructing us to part from each other. She wouldn't say why, but she promised that all would be figured out in due time and that we would reunite. And the worst part, she told us that you couldn't remember any of this. She needed you to forget so that you could truly convince Theren that the two of you were mates. She was worried that if you remembered about this, you would somehow expose the truth. I wanted you to argue, to fight to remember, but you agreed with her. You said that you couldn't be trusted to hide such an important secret and asked that Dean wipe your memories of this. The moon goddess promised that if we stopped the prophecy of her death, she would grant us a vast land magically concealed so that only rogues would be able to enter the territory. No need to fear alphas or packs attacking. A promise of peace. As a sign of good faith, she concealed the house, this house, from any person with bad intentions and gave me the power to control who could see it or not. She promised that when the time was right, you and I would find each other again, be together at last, and then she left. I don't remember any of this. I stammer out. I want to believe him, but this was impossible. Fine nods. When she left, I tried to convince you not to forfeit your memory of this. I didn't want you to forget me, but you insisted. You said your grams would have wanted you to help the moon goddess and that if she believed the best way to help was by giving up your magic and forgetting you, you would do it. Before Dean wiped your memory, you kissed me. You promised to return to me. Said that this would be temporary, that you knew in your soul that I was your other half. Fine pauses, looking at me to see if I remember. I don't. And so Dean wiped your memory as promised. I gave you a dose of sleeping medication to make you unconscious while I took you back to the man my mate would be staying with for goddess knew how long and I let you go. Fine's voice cracks and his eyes fill with tears. I had to give up my mate to save the moon goddess to grant my family of rogue safety. I had to let her return to a man who by all intents and purposes is my enemy. And it was the hardest thing I've ever done. Tears streamed down Finineian's face, and I find it hard to believe he would be this emotional over a lie. And for the next month, I would use your magic to summon the moon goddess, and she would give me various tasks,

All of them seemingly useless. She was tracking things and people, but assured me that everything was happening as it was supposed to. She promised me that you were safe in the arms of my enemy.

And then one day she told me that it was safe to retrieve you, that the prophecy predicting her death had been avoided and you could return to me and we could begin our lives as mates. And so once again, I took you. I planned on telling you everything on having Dean return your memories. But then you looked at me like I was a monster, he winces. And in your eyes I was. I probably am a monster for taking you like some treasure. I wanted you to stay, but you were in love with the His voice cracks and I too flinch at his name. I wanted to be with you more than anything except for your happiness. And so I vowed that if you chose between Theren and me and picked Theen, I would let you go once more, no matter how much it killed me. I would learn to live without my maid if it meant she was happier with someone else. And then you chose Theren. And once again, I had to send you right back into the arms of my enemy.

Tears streamed down his face, and for some reason, mine, too. The week you were gone was the longest week of my life. I prayed that you would return, that something inside you would remember me. But I vowed not to force you to be with me. I had already caused enough damage by taking you. And so, every night, I looked at the moon and prayed.

But then you returned, and you were nearly dead. He makes a terrible noise in the back of his throat. All of those prayers I made were answered in the worst possible way. You were broken inside when you came back here. A shell of who you used to be. And I wanted to hurt Theren for what he did to you. You were destroyed. Too fragile for me to tell you all of this. Too broken to have your world shattered even more by learning that the man you were with for the last few months wasn't really your mate at all. And so I made another vow not to tell you until you were ready, until you were whole, even if it meant you thinking I was a lunatic for believing that we were meant to be mates. And now here we are, and I can see that you still believe that. He finishes looking at my doubtful expression with sadness.

Nothing he's saying makes sense. Surely, if his words were valid, I would remember. Someone can't just forget. But in a twisted way, it does make sense. All of the doubts I had about The Theren, wishing I had a different mate. The feelings I have for Fine. My memories, I say, my voice little more than a whisper. Can Dean bring them back? Fine nods. Tell him to give them back, I say, my voice strengthening. I have to know once and for all whether his words are valid. I want them now. Fine hesitates. Ona, are you sure you're ready to remember all of this? No. Yes. Finny engages my facial expression, which I try to keep flat. He doesn't need to know how deep my inner turmoil goes. Finally, he nods. "Then I'll go get him," he says, standing up and leaving the library. "My insides are a disaster. This couldn't be true. The had to be my mate. Everything I went through, it was for him." Nearly hurting Brenda and staying with him even though he was holding my only friend hostage.

Finian returns a few minutes later with an apologetic Dean. Onixa, I'm so sorry about this. I really didn't want to wipe your memories. I promise I wouldn't ever do it unless you had asked. Dean swears, his eyes full of remorse. Just bring them back. I choke out if they were even really there. Dean looks to Finineian, who nods curtly. Dean kneels in front of me and puts his hands on both sides of my face. For a moment, nothing happens. And then I remember everything. I remember how scared I was when Fineian threatened to do something to me if I didn't summon the Moon Goddess. I recall how confused I was when the Moon goddess explained that we were meant to be mates. I remember begging Fineian to let Dean wipe my memories. I remember kissing him softly, promising that we would be together again soon. I remember everything. He has not lied, not about anything. We are mates.

When Dean pulls his hands away, the onslaught of memory stops. I'm sobbing. "Dean, leave us," Finian commands, and Dean looks at me apologetically one more time before leaving. Fine crouches down across from me, his eyes full of emotion. "Ona, I We're really mates," I whisper, my voice cracking. Fine nods. I throw myself into his arms, and we're both crying. But this is not a time for sadness because we are soulmates.

Chapter 56. I'm not sure how much longer we'll stay like that, crying in each other's arms. But when the tears subside, the sun is setting. Just like the day transforms into the night, I too transform from this new insight. I had been right all along to suspect that the moon goddess would never pair me with someone as cruel as Theren. When I noticed that something was missing with Theren that I had with Fineian, it was a true mating bond. Finine is my true mate. My guilt for starting a physical relationship with Fineian dissolved once my memories reappeared. I had no reason to feel guilty for being with someone else, with my mate. Everything is as it should be, except for one thing. Wait, I say to Fineian as I pull away. What now? I mean, there's still a prophecy that the moon goddess gets killed. Surely, there is more to be done. Fine nods. We can summon the moon goddess again. She could answer any of your questions better than I could. Okay, let's go, I say, getting up and tugging his wrist. He frowns. Are you sure you want to do this right now? I mean, you just learned something that'll change the course of your life. This could always wait for another day until you've had more time to process things. Oh, Fineian always so concerned, caring everything is not. I shake my head. I won't be able to sleep if I don't. I have to know what's going on. I insist. Fine hesitates before nodding. All right, let's go somewhere nobody will disturb us. I'm not sure what he means, but he takes my hand and guides me outside the house. And the whole time I can only think about how right it is to be with him, like every cell in my body is finally relaxed, knowing my true fate. We walk past the garden and he pauses in front of an empty patch of land. He waves his hand and suddenly a small brick building appears. We go inside and I frown when I look at our surroundings. There are multiple cells equipped with silver chains. It's a prison. I tense up. Finian, what is this place? I ask nervously, withdrawing my hand from his. It's a building for safety, he emphasizes the word like he's trying to lessen my distress. I haven't used it. It's just in case we run into, well, a not so friendly rogue. His words relax me slightly. It made sense that he would need somewhere to hold a dangerous rogue. I was just glad he didn't lock me in here the first time he took me. And when I look closer at the room, I recognize it. This is where we summoned her the first time. I recall remembering the room from the memories Dean restored. Fine nods. I can hide it from the others while we summon her. If your concentration gets broken, the communication could be lost. I almost ask how we establish communication, but then I realize that I already have the memories from the first time we did this. We need blood, I say nervously, hoping he doesn't plan on using mine. Fine pulls out a letter opener from his pocket. He must have grabbed it from the library before we left and holds open his palm. Wait, I cry out. You can't just cut yourself. It'll hurt. Fineian smiles slightly. It's all right, Onexa. If you're that worried, I can have Ronin heal me once we're done. I hesitate, but he's already cut across his palm and blood instantly pours out. My stomach lurches at the sight of him injured. How quickly things can change. How quickly I can change. He holds out his palm and I dip one of my fingers into the pool of blood. I use his blood to draw the symbol of the moon goddess on the ground of the prison, a crescent moon with a five-point star hanging off the top. I go outside of the jail for a minute to drain some of the energy from the grass since I can't withdraw any energy from inside the prison, not through the thick brick walls and return a moment later. I send my magic into the bloody symbol and darkness swirls around the shape just as it had in my memories. And then she appears. She is covered in the darkness, but I can see the outline of her figure, and she is a beautiful sight to behold, nearly too attractive for the mortal eye. "My goddess," I say, and drop to my knees, my neck bent in submission. "Fine does the same." She smiles so brilliantly, I have to blink twice to ensure that I'm seeing things as they are. "My children, please rise. You are doing me a great service. You have no reason to kneel." Fine. and I get up and I can't stop myself from gawking at her. I had seen her in my memories, but they did not do her proper form any justice. You have both done perfectly in ensuring that Helios does not rise to power. You have both sacrificed much for me and it will not be forgotten, she says. And I look to Fineian, who's also looking at me, no doubt, thinking of what we gave up for her. Each other, will you grant us the enchanted lands now? Finian asks hesitantly. We have done as you asked. The moon goddess laughs slightly. I have not forgotten our deal. Finley Baricus, she says with a wink. And I realized that I hadn't even known his full name. There is still much to learn about my other half. But I still need one more favor, she says, and looks directly at me. Whatever it is, I'll do it, Fineian promises emphatically. And I know that it is true. Whatever he has to do to secure the land for his family, he will do it. Not from you, my son. She shakes her head slightly and her black eyes are on me and for some reason I feel unnerved by them. From your mate, I furrow my eyebrows. What is it you need from me? I ask carefully, not trying to offend the immortal. Her grin widens. Nothing you are incapable of and nothing you already don't want. She pauses and my anxiety grows. It cannot be good. I need you to kill Ariio Alolat, the Luna of Blood Lake. She says the words lightly like she is merely suggesting what television show to watch. She is thoroughly unbothered by requesting that I kill one of her children. I blink. I can't kill her. The moon goddess seems amused by this. You certainly can. I can see why you may think that given her strength, but rest assured, my sweet child, you are much stronger than she. It would be almost too easy for you to drain the life from her. My stomach twists at her words. Finley looks at her in shock, his mouth slightly agape. No, I say slowly. I mean that I won't kill her. Fine looks sharply at me. There is no doubt that he remembers me telling him that Aizio is the reaper. The moon goddess's eyes narrow slightly as her grin falters. Excuse me. I know that I should beg for forgiveness and promise to do her bidding. I should agree to kill Aizio. I should kill Aizio. She is the reason Gradon is dead. Beyond that, she is the reason many are dead. I will not take life from anyone, I say weakly. I am terrified of her, and I don't mean Arriio. Her eyes narrow further and the darkness that swirls around her is even more intense. Perhaps sensing my anxiety. You will because you must. Arisio is under Helios thumb. She will do his bidding and she will be the reason for my downfall. If you want to gain the protected lands, then you will kill the shewolf. Fine looks at me in shock. Perhaps he feels betrayed by my refusal. I can't blame him. He's dedicated his life to saving rogues. And now I am refusing to kill the destructor of rogues, the executive. I will not take life from anyone, I say, my voice strengthening with resolve. There is always a choice. There must be another way. There is no other way. The moon goddess hisses and her words cut through me like a blade, chilling me to my core. You must fulfill the prophecy by slaying her. Her face suddenly softens as does her voice. "I'm surprised by you, Onixa Knight," she says. And her voice is as sweet as honey. "I thought you were destined to be the protector of rogues." Arisio has killed over a thousand innocent wolves. "Does that not bother you?" It does. It does, and she knows it. But I would not be able to live with killing anyone, even the most cruel person I know. I am aware that it is wrong, but it is also who I am. It is my weakness and it always will be. The knew as much. The moon goddess smiles and it is an ugly sight. Perhaps you would reconsider if you knew that the killed the rogue because of his feelings for her. Her words are like a dagger to my heart. I'm not sure if they are true, but they hurt nonetheless. Fine's face twists at the moon goddess. That's enough. He snarls, sounding surprisingly harsh. I don't recognize him in that moment. We will find another way that doesn't involve my mate. We are done here. Fine quickly gets up and uses his hand to smudge the symbol made from his blood. As he does so, the moon goddess disappears with it, her face completely shocked as she dissipates. I want to cry, but there are no tears left in me. Her words leave me feeling hollow. Fineian wipes the blood onto his jeans and takes my face in his hands, forcing me to look up at him. Ona, I swear I had no idea she was going to ask you to do that. She's never mentioned it before. I swear. His words deeply perplex me. You aren't going to make me kill her. I ask in confusion. He looks at me as though he's surprised I'm asking. Of course not, Onxa. I wouldn't ever make you do something you didn't want to, especially killing someone else. Now I'm even more confused. You don't think she should die? What about all of the rogues she's killed? And what about your enchanted land? He kisses my forehead. Azio deserves to die more than anyone. But if she is to be slain, it will not be by your hand. I will find another way. I promise you. We walk back to his home. our home. In silence, I suddenly wished for my Grams, who would know exactly what to do. I felt deeply conflicted. If I kill Arriio, I will spend a lifetime thinking about how I drained the life from another person. If I kill Ariio, I will spend a lifetime in hiding from the blood alpha. And if the moon goddess wasn't lying, from Fen. But if I don't kill her, she will continue to kill more innocent people. If she is as much like Theen as I suspect, she won't be able to stop herself from doing it. If I don't kill her, Fine will never have his protected lands and will be forever bound to what little land he does have with the house. Would it be so bad to kill her if it meant creating peace for many? Fine would say no, and he would likely be right. Logically, I know killing Aizio is what I should do. But then I think back to Lucian. Lou would tell me that no peace could ever bloom in the soil of blood. He would tell me that there is always a choice. I don't know what the right choice is.

Chapter 57. The walk back to the house is a short one for which I am grateful. Summoning the moon goddess took more energy out of me than I anticipated, though I had a feeling it had more to do with what she said than the magical aspect. When we get back to Fineian's room, he leans over to kiss my cheek and bids me good night. Wait, I say in confusion as he turns to leave. Where are you going? He blinks. Um, to bed. I frown. You don't want to stay? He chuckles lowly. One has nothing to do with it, my lovely mate. My frown deepens. Well, I just figured that since we're mates, you were expecting to. His voice cuts off my statement. I expect nothing, Onixa. Besides you to get some rest, you look exhausted. I realize then that I'm going about this all wrong. My terrible fighting skills are the only thing worse than my skill with talking to males. Finine, will you stay with me tonight so I don't have to keep sneaking into your room? He looks surprised by my outright invitation, but I have no reason to be shy. Not anymore. I have waited for happiness for too long, and at some point it needs to become my responsibility to make it happen. He pauses, and for a moment, I'm worried he may say no. Do you still promise to keep your hands to yourself? He teases, a grin slowly spreading across his face. "No, good," he responds, laughing, though his eyes widen slightly at my brazeness. "You weren't holding to that promise very well." Anyways, I roll my eyes, but cross the room, so I'm standing in front of him. I take his hand, the one he cut for the summoning, and inspect the wound. It hasn't healed yet. I furrow my eyebrows. Go to Ronin so he can heal you, I demand. Fine. looks amused. It's just a cut, Onixa. I think I'll live, but it could get infected. What if a harmful bacteria gets into the wound while you're sleeping and when you wake up it's green and your eyes are yellow and you die within the hour? I panic, my voice rising slightly. I thought I already lost a mate. I could not lose another. Fine laughs, pulling my head into his chest. Is this what I have to look forward to for the rest of my life? He teases. And when I look up at him, his eyes are glowing in adoration. And I realize that he's right. We are to be together for the rest of our lives. And the thought of being with Finian forever is not so scary at all. In fact, I can't think of anything I want more. Please. I switch to pleading knowing that he won't tell me no. I don't understand why the sight of his hand bleeding is so troublesome to me, but it is. Fine, but the corners of his mouth are still turned upwards. Yes, dear," he replies slightly mockingly once again kissing my forehead before leaving. While he's gone, I take a bath once again using his soap. But this time, I needn't make any excuses as to why. Everything makes sense. Fine makes sense, and he is mine as I am his. That knowledge brings more color to my face, makes my eyes glow a little bit brighter, and when he returns, he looks nearly as happy as I feel. When he walks in, he freezes, staring intensely at me. I can't believe this is the sight I'll get to return to every night. There is no man more fortunate than I, not half as lucky nor blessed. His words make my cheeks flush, and when he strips to his boxers, it does nothing to stop the reening. Finian's beauty is something out of fairy tales, something I can hardly comprehend, but doesn't seem to be real anyway. He turns out the light and gets into bed next to me. The first time we have been under the covers together before falling asleep, and suddenly all of my bravado disappears, and I feel very, very nervous. Finine pulls me into his chest, and our limbs intertwine for the first time before we fall asleep, and not afterwards. I can hear his heart beating fast and I'm sure he can listen to mine. I say nothing. I don't know what I could say to explain my gratitude to him for all he has done for me, for his patience, for his kindness. If he is my other half, then I am a better person than I thought. The thought comforts me as I drift off into a blissful rest.

When I wake up, I can tell that I've slept in quite a bit. The sun is already shining through the windows. And when I look at the clock, I realize it's already afternoon. My dreams had been far too peaceful, too happy, and I did not doubt that Finine was the reason. Speaking of, I had no idea where he went. Waking up alone can be scary in our world. I relax when I see a note on the nightstand in Finineian's perfect flowy handwriting that reads, "My love, my other half, my Onixa. I sincerely apologize for having to leave this morning, so you must awaken alone. I promise this will be the second to last day you will ever wake up without me by your side, but I have a surprise planned, a date. Unfortunately, I will be away for most of the day to set it up. I made muffins for you when you wake up there on the counter in the kitchen. I told Dean that I would sick Ronin on him if he ate any of them, so there should be plenty. Be ready by 7. I love you always, Finineian." His words replace my insides with butterflies. He has told me twice before that he loves me, but seeing it written out so clearly on paper makes everything much more real. I read the note approximately 20 times before putting it in my dresser. I want to keep it forever. I still have a few more hours to get ready, and so I try to pass the time by reading the first book Fineian gave me, A Tale of Two Cities. But my heart still races and my fingers shake from nervousness at the idea of a date. And I find it hard to concentrate even though Finineian's annotations fascinate me. I don't even think I had ever been on a date before. Not really. Theren and I never went on one. And unless you count the lake visit with Finian as a date, this would be my first one. What do I even wear? How should I do my hair? Vineian hadn't provided any details about the occasion, and it gave me anxiety about wearing the wrong outfit. Everything has to go perfectly. My ruminations come to a halt when there's a knock on my door. I expect it to be Finineian, even though he said he would be away. So, I'm surprised to open the door and see Kalia and Astra standing there with bags in their hands. Kalia looks mortified as she looks at me. "Ona, what are you doing? Why haven't you started to get ready yet?" she asks in horror. Astra rolls her eyes at her. I look at the clock. Um, because I have two more hours, I say in confusion. Kalia groans. That's like 20 minutes in girl getting ready time. I hadn't realized there was a conversion factor. Astro mutters. You're fine, Onixa. We have plenty of time. Just go get in the shower and we'll set up. What are you guys doing here? I ask, still confused as they push past me into Fineian's room. Set up what? Calias squeals and Astro winces. You didn't think Finineian would take you on a date without telling us, did you? He recruited us to help you get ready. My heart warms. Of course he did. No doubt knowing how anxious I would be. How could someone like him be my other half? Today is a very important day. Calia says seriously, and Astra nods. I raise my eyebrows. You know it's my first date. No, because it's Kalia starts and Astra stomps on her foot, shaking her head, and Calia's eyes widen. Because it's your first date with Finian, she says quickly, and my eyes narrow in suspicion. Hurry up and go wash your hair. It looks like a rat's nest. I sigh, grumbling as I get in the shower, but I desour when I think about Finny and lovely, sweet Finley.

When I get out of the shower, Kalia gives me a silk robe to put on. You guys are really going all out. I laugh. Direct orders from your mate, Astra says seriously. And for once, I don't flinch when someone refers to Fineian as my mate. Kalia paints my nails while Astra blow dries my hair, brushing it out as she does so. Once they're both finished, Astra begins to straighten my hair while Kalia starts on my makeup. So, you know everything? Kalia asks excitedly as she powders my face. I cough as some gets in my nose, fighting the urge to sneeze. Yeah, I confirm, smiling slightly. Listen, I'm sorry about everything. You know, leaving the first time being the reason Theren tracked you all. Kalia waves her hand dismissively. No need to be sorry, Nyx. All great fairy tales have a few bumps in the road, a few monsters. It's what makes the happy ending so much more satisfying. Her words nearly bring tears to my eyes. And if I weren't scared of being yelled at for ruining my makeup, I may have cried. Could that really be what this is, a fairy tale? Am I finally getting my happy ending with my prince charming? When they're finished, my mouth drops open as I look in the mirror. They have completely transformed me into the princess Kalia believes I am. My black hair is entirely straight, and I'm surprised by how long it is once the curls are flattened. Kalia made my eye makeup neutral, which I was concerned about. Using only nude shadows and dark mascara. Don't cry. You'll ruin the makeup and I'll have to kill you. Astra says seriously, and it makes me laugh. Oh man, I'm ruining my makeup. Kalia wales and sure enough, tears are streaming down her face. Kalia, why are you so emotional? It's only a first date. I laugh. Kalia holds her eyes open as she fans them with her hand to keep the tears at bay because you two are finally together. All is right in the world. I get to see my big brother happy with the kindest girl I know. It's all I've ever wanted for him. Oh man, if Astra hadn't threatened me, I would definitely be crying, too. Go get dressed. We're running out of time. Astra orders. What should I wear? I ask, still unsure of what Fineian has planned. I tried getting answers out of them, but they wouldn't give any information up. Vinnian bought you a dress. We put it on the bed for you, Kalia says excitedly, and we go back into the bedroom where sure enough, there's a dress waiting. It's a beautiful green gown, exactly the color of Fineian's eyes, which makes me love it even more. It's almost casual, made of a thin cotton material with a low cut front and a high slit on the side. My mouth drops open. Fine. picked this. Calia laughs and Astra snorts. Well, we may have helped. And by helped, I mean we chose it and Finineian paid for it. It was a group effort, really. Dean drove. Oh, goddess. I have done nothing in my life to deserve them. To deserve Finineian. Whatever good karma I had racked up in a past life, I thanked my former self. I put on the dress almost as the clock hits 7. Kalia was right. Time is different when you're getting ready. Astra nearly breaks my foot as she shoves it into a high heeled shoe and Kalia paces around the room anxiously looking at her watch every few seconds. Once I have the shoes on, Kalia claps her hands together. All right, people. It's go time. She shouts and Astra and I both went. We go downstairs and Finineian is waiting, laughing with Ronin and Dean. His face immediately turns solemn when he sees me. Fine looks stunning in his clothing. a white dress shirt paired with khaki pants which is quite different from his usual attire of flannel shirts and jeans. His light brown hair is neat. All curls perfectly placed. He is the most gorgeous person I have ever seen and I smile slightly when I remember that my first word to him was pretty. I was right. Vine's Adam's apple bobs up and down and his eyes darken. I'm glad I'm wearing makeup otherwise I would look like an apple. Dean whistles lowly. "You sure you want Finnegan, Nicks?" Ronin punches him hard in the shoulder and Dean winces. "He meant to say that you look lovely," Ronan smiles warmly. Dean scowls, "I was getting to that part." "Lovely is an understatement," Finine says and quickly crosses the floor to me. "No words could possibly explain your beauty." Fine gently kisses my lips. "Hi," he murmurs against my mouth. "Hi, back," I whisper. not capable of more than a few words for the time being. Get out of here, you crazy kids. Kalia laughs. I better not see you guys until the morning. Her words make my face heat up and Fineian rolls his eyes. Don't listen to her. He whispers and takes my hand. We leave the house. Calia and Dean making kissing sounds the whole way out, much to my embarrassment.

As soon as we take a step outside, Fineian scoops me into his arms, making me yelp in surprise. I can walk, I insist. Not in those shoes, he laughs. And not in the woods. Plus, I could never pass up the chance to have you in my arms. While he carries me, I only stare at him. He has a perpetual smile on his face, showing his deep dimples that only make him more attractive. We're here, he says after walking in the woods for some time. I pull my gaze away from his face and gasp when I see what he's been doing all day. We're at the lake, but a different part of it than we went to last time. We're in a much more secluded section underneath a huge cliff that overlooks it. There's a blanket on the ground with a picnic basket on top of it. There are candles everywhere, but that's not the part that takes my breath away. He's covered the entire ground with puppies. Finny and you. I struggle to find the words. You did all of this for a first date? He grins, kissing my cheek. No, my love. I did this for you. I can't cry. I can't cry. I can't cry. Those are the words I repeat to myself as Finine sets me down on the blanket. I can't believe you did all of this for me, I whisper, my voice sounding wrong because I'm choked up. I had some help, he admits with a smile. I pledged my gardening services to Dean for a month so he would let me steal all of the puppies. He remembered. Of course, he remembered that puppies were my favorite. When he asked, we were in a completely different place. I was destroyed from losing Gradon, terrorized by Theren, and didn't know we were mates. But he did. I press my lips to his, and there is no sweeter taste. He pulls away much too quickly, and I groan, disgruntled. He laughs at my distress. Not yet. You need to eat first. He opens the picnic basket, pulling out copious amounts of food. When he retrieves a bottle of champagne and two glasses, I nearly laugh when I remember the last time he did that. It's a special occasion. I hope the police will understand. He jokes, popping the top off. We eat and we drink, talking, laughing, and everything in between. My heart has never felt so full, overflowing with love. Everything about his personality compliments mine perfectly, and I couldn't believe that there was ever a point in time when I thought Theon was my mate. I couldn't believe there was a time when I chose to forget him, to leave him behind. We watch the sunset, and when it's on the cusp of darkness, Finian takes his hand in mine after clearing the blanket of all of the plates and glasses. He looks nervous. Ona, I have loved you from the day I met you. The day I met you is the day I lost you, and I will never lose you again. I have never known someone so kind, so passionate, or so caring. Before I met you, I only saw the world in black and white. Now that I have you and have been fortunate enough to know you, everything is in every vivid color on the spectrum. Everything is brighter, cleaner, and clearer. And nothing is more clear than how much I love you and how I want to spend the rest of my life with you. He says these words seriously, looking at me with so much intensity that it sets my heart on fire. Fine. I I choke out, tears threatening to spill from my eyes. "Let me finish," he says, smiling nervously, his voice shaking slightly. He releases my hand. He gets on one knee. He reaches into his back pocket and I gasp. Fine opens the box, revealing a circular diamond ring. Onix a night, my mate, my other half, love of my life. Willis, you marry me. Sits back and sips tea. Okay, fine. It's alcohol. Mind your business.

Chapter 58. He has truly shocked me and everything makes sense now. Calia's eagerness, Finineian's nervousness. I promise this will be the second to last time you wake up alone. He was talking about our wedding day. My brain suddenly shuts down, only restarting when I remember that the question usually requires an answer. But we barely know each other. I stammer out, but his grin doesn't falter. Maybe he expected that I would have reservations. We are mates. I know that I love you, that I will love you until the day I die, and well into the afterlife. I do not need to know anything else, he answers resolutely. But but werewolves don't even get married, I say. And I know I'm grasping at straws when I'm really just trying to buy time. Fine laughs at this. You grew up on human television and movies, Onixa. Romance books and love songs. In many ways, you're more human than wolf. I want to show my love in a human way, not just wolf. His words have the impact they were intended to have. He truly does understand me better than anyone ever has, better than I even understand myself. And all everyone wants is someone who understands them, who sees them, their soul, and everything they are. And Finineian sees me. And I see him. Yes, I choke out and tears run down my face. Yes, I'll marry you. I throw my arms around him, half laughing, half crying. My emotions are all over the place, but the only thing sure about them is the love I have for Fineian. Fine pulls away from me, laughing breathlessly. He took the ring out of the velvet box and placed it on my finger. It fits perfectly. His hands shake as he does so. You'll have to forgive my unsteady hands. He apologizes. You gave me quite a scare. I laugh, still crying, and throw myself into his waiting arms once again. He puts his hands on my face and stares deeply into my eyes. "You are so beautiful," he whispers, and my lips meet his. Things get out of control from there. We kiss each other with so much intensity that the sparks between us could have burned down the entire forest. I wouldn't have cared if it did. My hands go to his hair and I shove my fingers through the curls and he groans slightly. Our lips are feverish against each other, our tongues flickering like the flames of the candles that surround us. I pull at his shirt, not caring when buttons fly in every direction, only caring about maximizing my contact with my mate. my mate and soon my husband. He is much more gentle with me than I am with him, carefully lifting my dress above my head and setting it down lightly next to us. His patience infuriates me. He laughs when I tug on his belt, willing it to come off. Patience, my love, he whispers into my ear, sending a chill down my spine. I have waited for you for so long. I will not rush this moment. And he has waited for me. He has waited for me when I had forgotten him when I shared my bed with another male. He has waited for me to heal from the wounds I received at the hands of that same male. Screw patience. Once he undo his belt, I rip it from the loops, throwing it carelessly to the side, which only makes him chuckle more. In one swift movement, he wraps his arms around my lower back and my neck, laying me gently on the blanket. I wrap my arms around his neck and my legs around his muscular back. I love you, I whisper in between kisses. I have never said anything truer. I loved you before you even knew my name, he replies and lightly undoes my breazir. And I will love you when we are old and gray until the sun stops shining. Perhaps not even then. He kisses my lips so softly. I wouldn't have even known they were touching were it not for the electricity I felt at the contact. My whole body felt as if it were being electrified. He continues to kiss me down my neck until he finds a spot so sensitive that I moan and arch my back until my chest is pressed to his. Do it, I whisper breathlessly. He pulls away, taking my face in his hands. Ona, are you sure? I'll only do it if you're sure, he says, and his voice is strained. His eyes are dark, and I realize that he's fighting back his wolf. The was going to mark me without my consent. Finine would rip himself away from me right now if I even hesitated. I want you too, I promise. And there is no doubt in my voice because I have no doubts. I want you, Finine, in every way. Then you shall have me, he says, his voice husky. He kisses the spot gently and once again I moan, which makes him growl against the base of my throat. I love you, he repeats softly before sinking his teeth into my neck. I cry out in pain, but it quickly turns into noises of pleasure. Suddenly, my mind is not my own. My spirit is not alone. I can sense his emotions so well that I can nearly read his thoughts. I can feel his heart and mind beat at the same tempo. And now we are truly mates in every sense of the word. His teeth remain in my neck as he gently pushes himself into me. But that pain doesn't last either. The pain never lasts long with Fineian.

When I wake up, I'm no longer outside. I'm in a bed. Fine's bed. Our bed. My eyes meet Fineian's concerned ones. Hey, I say weekly. Hey, he says, his eyes softening. You were out for a long time. Willis tells me it's normal for you to need rest after being marked. I look out the window and sure enough, the sun is already setting. I have been sleeping for almost an entire day. Drink this. Finineian instructs, handing me a glass of water from the nightstand. And take this, he hands me two pills, and I recognize them as painkillers. Why these? I ask curiously. My neck doesn't hurt at all from being marked. Fine looks away momentarily. Trust me, you'll want to take those. I shrug and do as he says. He takes the cup back once I finished drinking and as soon as his hands are freed, he tilts my head up and kisses me deeply. I pull away after a moment. I have to pee. I blurt out. Fine laughs, kissing my nose softly. I already told you I built bathrooms specifically for that purpose. I groan in embarrassment, quickly rushing out of bed. In my hurry, I nearly fall over when the simple act of standing up hurts my inner thighs. Oh, I say, my mouth forming an O-shape as I realize why he gave me the painkillers. Oh, indeed, he nods, smirking slightly. I throw a pillow at his face before wobbling into the bathroom. When I look in the mirror, I cannot believe how different I am from when I came here after that night. Everything has changed, and I more than most. When I return, Finineian is lying on the bed with his eyes closed, and I notice that he has dark circles underneath them. Have you slept yet? I ask in concern as I get into bed next to him. No, he admits, his cheeks blushing slightly. I was worried about you. Oh, Fineian, selfless to a fault. Go to sleep, I tell him. I'm pretty tired myself, even though I had slept all day. I can think of something better to do. He nips at my ear, making me squeal. After you've slept, I giggle and he playfully pouts as he pulls me into his arms and we both fall asleep like that.

My sleep is not restful. I am plagued by nightmares of my grandmother begging me to save her, of Gradon begging me to save him, and of the calling me a disgrace before ripping out Fineian's heart. When I wake up, I know what I have to do to move on and leave my past behind me. Truly, I sneak out of bed, silently, putting my clothes on, and Finineian is still asleep when I reach the door. I'm thankful now that he had waited to sleep because he won't be awake for what I do next. I tiptoe through the house, and since it is so late, nobody is awake. When I'm outside, I exhale in relief. Until I hear him, "You're leaving me?" Fine says, his voice full of anguish. I turn around to face my mate and now my fianceé. Not forever, I insist. And when I take a step toward him, he takes one back. Why? He asks, his eyes full of hurt. There's something I have to do, I say quietly. I can't explain it to him because it won't make sense. It doesn't even make sense to me. I walk until I'm face to face with him, and I rest my hand on his cheek. His eyes are full of tears, and his jaw is clenched. I promise you, Fineian, I will come back to you. I vow. The last time you promised that I didn't see you for months, he whispers, his face trembling slightly under my touch. I can feel his pain and anxiety through the bond. I can't marry you until I do this. I kiss his lips softly. I promise you this will be the last time we are ever apart. I'll be back before the sun rises. My heart breaks when I look at him. Promise me you won't forget, he says, his voice strained. I thought he was going to try to stop me. Perhaps he does understand. I promise I will never forget you again. I swear and I won't. He is my life. I would never forget again. He nods slightly. Be careful. I will. I promise. And I can't believe he's letting me go. The phrase, "If you love something, let it go," comes to mind. And if that is true, he loves me more than anyone has ever loved another. I walk away from her home and I feel his gaze on me until I am too deep in the trees to be in sight. I use my magic to conceal myself and as I travel through the forest, I am invisible to everyone and everything. When I reach the outskirts of Blue Moon, it is too easy to sneak past the guards. They don't even glance in my direction. I reach my destination. My grandmother's tree is just as healthy as it once was. And for a brief moment, I wonder if someone has been watering it. If anything, I'm surprised Theren hadn't chopped it down and used the wood in his fireplace. I use my magic to lift the tree from the ground, taking the roots with it. I was wondering when you would come back for it. The voice from my nightmare calls out. Only this is no nightmare. I turn to my former mate, draining the life from the grass, ready to attack. I hesitate when I see him. He has grown a beard and his hair is longer. Messier, for the first time since I met him, he looks unckempt. His magic slices through my darkness and I am fully exposed to him. Have you come to kill me? He asks, not sounding upset, only curious. I should, I say, keeping my voice steady. It's not like you don't deserve it. True, he surprises me by agreeing. Would you even stop me? I say, shocked by his cavalier attitude. No. His words chill me more than they would have if he had said yes. I don't recognize him at all. I shake off my surprise. I came here for one reason and one reason only. Unfortunately for you, I'm only here for my grandmother. No assassinations planned. Very unfortunate, he draws, and his face is somber. There is no hint of the arrogance that once graced his face and every movement. Are you going to stop me? I ask, my magic still crackling around me. He didn't remember the last time we fought each other and has no reason to believe that I could kill him where he stands. No, again, a monoselabic answer. His face is blank, devoid of any emotion. I use my magic

To carry the tree with me as I take a step back from him. Wait, he calls out just as I'm about to wrap myself in the darkness once more. Are you happy with him? His question shocks me. What? I ask, dumbfounded. How did he remember that day at the lake?

Darren's green eyes go from my neck to the ring that still sits on my finger, and where it will stay until the day I die. I realize then that he can probably also smell my scent, that it is mixed with another's. He knows I've been marked by someone else. Yes, I finally answer his question. I'm happy with him. Happy doesn't even begin to cover what I feel with Fineian, but I have no desire to kick a man while he's already down. I smell alcohol, and I know that he's been drinking. He only nods like he's unsurprised by my answer. I take another step away from him, waiting for him to stop me, but he doesn't. He is completely broken. And it's not nearly as satisfying as I thought it would be. Which is why I tell him what I say next.

"Warn Aario," I say, and his eyes widen slightly at her name. "The Moon Goddess was not lying at all. There are people conspiring against her. I don't know who, but she is in danger." I'm not entirely sure why I decided to warn him. Perhaps looking at the shell of the person he once was has made me feel something for him that I never thought I would. Compassion. Vengeance is not nearly as sweet as people paint it out to be. He nods, but I can see his fists clench. "Be well, Onixa." "You too," I say, and I'm not sure if I mean it. I wrap myself and the tree in darkness, leaving Theren behind me. It is all behind me now. I return home to my mate before the sun is up.

Chapter 59.

When I get back to our house, it's Dean who is the first to greet me. He throws open the door before I even have a chance to touch the handle, and I jump in surprise. My surprise only amplifies when he pulls me in for a tight hug, putting his chin on the top of my head. "You're in so much trouble," he whispers into my hair. "Is that Onixa? Is she back?" I hear Kalia call out, followed by the sound of footsteps. Dean pulls away only for Calia to take his place. "I'm going to kill you," she says, squeezing me tightly. "Can't breathe," I gasp through her iron grip. Kalia hugs me even tighter before finally releasing me. "Don't do that ever again," she says, and my eyes widen when I see that hers are filled with tears. "I won't," I say, shocked by their emotional reactions to my leaving. "How did you guys?"

Ronin walks up, his face unreadable. "We always have someone keeping watch at night in case any rogues stumble past the house and need shelter. I saw you leave," Dean says, his eyes sad. "I woke up Finineian to tell him and once he got back from chasing after you, he told us where you went." Kalia throws her arms up. "I mean, seriously, Onixa, what the hell were you thinking going back to him? What the hell were you thinking leaving us again?" I'm at a loss for words, shocked by these wolves' concern. I hadn't really expected them to notice, especially not to care this much.

"What Kalia means to say," Ronin says gently, "is that we were worried about you." "I'm sorry," I stutter, still shell-shocked. "I didn't know." "You didn't know what, Onixa?" Dean demands, sounding uncharacteristically upset. "That we care about you. You're a part of our family. You can't just be going on random trips alone in the middle of the night without telling us."

"Guys, lay off," Finian suddenly appears, his voice somber. "Can you leave us alone for a minute?" With one last disappointed look at me, they leave the room. And I wish they hadn't, because now I have to face Finineian. "Hi," I say awkwardly. "Hey," he says, his eyes softening. "Finian, listen. I'm so sorry," I begin my apology, but he pulls me into his arms and I immediately relax into them. For some reason, I start to cry. "Sure, it's okay, my love," he whispers, pressing his lips against my mark, making me whimper. "You're back now. That's all that matters." He strokes my hair and holds me in his arms until the crying stops. "Let's go run you a bath and we can talk about it." "Okay," he suggests, and I nod gratefully. Fine picks me up in his arms and carries me to our room. Once the bath is ready, and after he gently strips me and places me in the water, he sits on the floor, leaning back against the wall.

"I saw him," I blurt out after a few moments of silence. "Theren. He was there." Fineian's eyes widen. "Did you?" I shake my head. "Kill him?" "No, but he practically asked me to." Fine looks relieved by my answer, albeit slightly confused. "He asked you to kill him?" I sigh, closing my eyes and sinking deeper in the water. "It was bad, Fineian. He looked really bad. He was so broken. I don't understand it. I don't understand him." Fine contemplates my words. "Do you think he regrets what he did to your friend?" I shake my head again. "He didn't apologize for it or anything." "What did he say?" Finian asks, not sounding mad, just curious. "He knows about you," I say quietly, and his eyes widen more. "Well, not you specifically. He saw your mark, the ring. He knows I'm with someone else." "Was he mad? Did he try to hurt you?" Fine asks, and I can see his eyes search my body for injuries. "No, nothing like that," I quickly say and frown when I remember his reaction. "He wanted to know if I was happy with you. When I said I was, he looked relieved, like he accepted it. He told me to be well and then let me leave. Didn't try to stop me or anything." Fine shakes his head slowly in disbelief. "Onixa, it was too risky for you to go back there. I don't know why he didn't flip out at the mark, but he could have lost control and hurt you. He's already done that once. Please tell me you got whatever it is you went there for. I can't let you go again, especially not back to him." I nod. "I planted my grandmother in the garden before coming to the door, but that wasn't all I came back with. I hadn't realized it at the time, but I think a part of me was looking for closure with Theren. The way we left things the first time deeply wounded me, but after leaving this time, I could feel those wounds beginning to heal." "I thought it would feel better," I admit quietly to my mate. "I would have thought that seeing him so depressed and low would make me feel better about what happened with Gradon, but seeing him like that made me feel hollow." Fine looks at me in sympathy. "Revenge is ugly, Onixa. It darkens even the most pure of hearts. All you can do is live your life and live it well. What he did to your friend was cruel, unforgivable, but it sounds like he's already paying the price for it." I smile slightly at my other half. "Has anyone ever told you that you should start an advice column?" He laughs. "Maybe I'll get right on that after the wedding preparations are made." His words remind me of all we still have to do. "Speaking of, are we supposed to set a date for that?" I frown. Fine shrugs. "Why not next week?" My mouth drops open. "You just proposed two nights ago." His eyes glow in happiness. "So what? Everyone we love is already here. I know I told you that I would wait forever to make you mine if I had to, but now that I don't, I see no point in waiting to make it official. Life is short, Onixa. Any day I spend not being your husband is a day wasted," he says with a wink. I laugh. "Well, there's nothing more appealing than the idea of being your wife as well as mate. That's not enough time to plan a wedding." "Sure it is," he grins. "You haven't seen how productive Calia can be on coffee and a deadline." "This is crazy," I laugh, running my hand through my hair. "I can't believe this is all happening so fast." Finian moves to the edge of the tub and places both of his hands on the sides of my face. "Ona, there is nothing in the world that is going to stop me from marrying you, especially not wedding semantics. We're getting married next week and soon after that we're going on our honeymoon." My mouth drops open. "A honeymoon? Like out of the country?" I had never been anywhere but these woods. Fine laughs, kissing my temple. "Anywhere you'd like, my love. The further away from Dean, the better." "Surprise me," I say with a grin. "Somewhere warm. Oh, and with a beach." Fine nods seriously. "Got it. Sun, beach, and a bed big enough for me to." I giggle and splash him with the water. He laughs and playfully growls. "All right, that's enough bathing. I've got other plans for you today." "Other plans?" I squeak as he lifts me out of the bathtub and wraps a towel around me. "Of course, my darling fiance." He grins wickedly, carrying me into our bedroom. "We've got to start practicing for our honeymoon."

After spending much of the morning tangled in the sheets with my mate, I slept until the late afternoon. When I woke up alone, there was a note from Fineian reading: "My lovely kidnapper/mate/fiance, and everything in between, out with Calia and Dean running wedding errands. Apparently, Kalia has a notebook filled with decorating and dress ideas. Yes, it is as terrifying as it sounds and wants to get started planning right away. We'll be back in a few hours. Ronin mentioned finding a cherry tree in the garden that had appeared overnight. He wanted to know if you had anything to do with it. Avoid talking to him if he has gardening shears in his hand, especially if they're extra sharp. I love you always. You're equally lovely kidnapper/mate/fiance." I laugh at his letter, reading the last two words a few hundred times over, still unable to believe how lucky I am to be with my other half. After putting the note with the one he left me the morning of our engagement, I get dressed once again, choosing to wear one of his hoodies. I remembered when not too long ago, I hadn't understood why wearing his clothes and breathing in his scent had provided me with so much comfort. Everything has changed, and Finineian was right when he told me at the lake that change can be for the better. Change had been good for me. Fine is good for me, for my happiness, for my weary heart.

Once dressed, I go out to the garden where I see Ronin staring at the tree, completely perplexed. When I explain that it's my grandmother, he doesn't seem disturbed, only suggests that we move it somewhere with better lighting. When I use my magic to move it, he stares at me in shock. "Why have we been hunched over plants for hours when you could have just been doing that?" he teasingly asks. I grin at him, a smile so big it nearly hurts my cheeks because, Ro, some things are worth the extra time and care. After helping Ronin replant more poppies after Finn and commandeered all of them for the proposal, I go back inside to find my mate. When traveling through the hallways, I run into Hudson. "Hi, Onixa," he greets me with a smile. "Hi, Hudson," I say back, noticing that he appears to be wearing new attire. "Nice clothes. Dean and Kalia went shopping with me," Hudson informs me with a blush. "She went a little over the top." "Sounds like Calia," I agree with a laugh. Despite her extravagant tendencies, my heart warmed at the thought of her, all of my family. "Nice ring," Hudson says with a slight knowing smirk. "Looks like things weren't too complicated after all, huh?" I stare at the marvelous oval diamond with a grin. "No, everything is perfect."

Chapter 60.

The following six days fly by in the blink of an eye. Fine and Calia handle all of the wedding details, and Finineian tells me not to worry about any of it. I think he knew that I loathe making any decision and wouldn't want the pressure of having to make decisions for an entire wedding. So, they handle absolutely everything from dresses to decor to the music they're going to play. I hadn't even seen my dress yet. On that sixth night, Finineian returns from a long day away, finalizing wedding plans. I try to pull him into bed, but he laughs and resists my tugs. "Sorry, my love. You know that human custom says that we have to spend the night before the wedding apart. If we're going to do this, we'd better do it right." I pout. "You're really going to make me sleep alone because of a dumb human tradition?" Fine laughs again, pulling me into his arms for a tight hug. "It'll just make seeing you tomorrow all the more exciting, my love." I groan. "Uggh. If humans had mates, they wouldn't even suggest something so torturous." "It'll just be one night, my darling fiance," Fine chuckles. "I promise this will be the last night you'll ever spend without me. Go get some beauty rest." "Okay. Calia threatened to chop my balls off if you had dark circles under your eyes tomorrow." He kisses me good night before ducking out of the room.

I toss and turn for hours, too nervous to fall asleep. I groaned and got out of bed. Screw patience. I had wasted so many nights away from Fineian already. I would not throw another one away. When I sneak into his guest room and crawl into his bed, he doesn't send me away. He pulls me into his arms and holds me tightly, and sleep finds me almost instantly. I wasn't surprised when by the time I woke up, Fineian was gone. There was another note on the dresser, and I smiled, thinking of my collection of notes from my beautiful mate. "My mate, love of my life, and after today, my wife. I should be infuriated with you for sullying my honor by crawling into my bed before I properly wed you. But as I write this, you snore softly, and your little hands stretch out on my side of the bed, seeking me out, even in slumber. I suppose I can forgive this one indiscretion, if only because I have never seen someone more darling and beautiful. I would go on and on about how much I love you, but you'll have to wait until we vow to hear it. I'll see you soon, my love. For one last day, your fianceé." The note floods my heart with warmth, and I go into our room to put it with the others. When I get there, Kalia and Astra are already waiting. Kalia squeals when she sees me, pulling me into her arms. "I can't believe after today you'll officially be my sister." I laugh and my heart feels unbelievably full. I went from having nobody to having an entire family of my own. Even Astra seems like she's in a good mood. "Congratulations, Ona," she says with a small smile. "I can't think of any two people more perfect for each other. You make a beautiful couple." My cheeks reen as she pulls me in for a hug of her own. I'm not used to her showing any affection with anyone but Willis. "You guys are here early," I note as Kalia shoves me into the bathroom and turns on the shower. "Conversion factor," Astra says and rolls her eyes at Kalia. "We have a lot of work to do," Kalia says seriously and pulls out a clipboard. "Don't worry, I've scheduled everything." "Of course you have," I mutter before getting in the shower.

Once I'm out, Kalia and Astra begin the hours-long process of getting me ready. When they're finished, I gasp as I look in the mirror. They've completely transformed me. Kalia kept my makeup fairly neutral, but it looks stunning nonetheless. Astra put my hair in an intricate updo, even putting small blue flowers in the braids. "The flowers are beautiful, Astra," I tell her honestly. "They make me look like a woodland nymph." Astra shrugs. "It's your something blue. Ronin gave them to me and told me to put them in your hair. Said you would look beautiful." "He was right," I blush from her compliment. "Ronin is such a sweetheart." "You're something new is your dress," Calia informs me. "Speaking of, go put it on. It's hanging up on the door." I gulp nervously and get up to see the dress. My mouth drops when I see it. Kalia has chosen the perfect dress. It was a simple white gown, but it featured a gorgeous lace overlay with intricate floral patterns. The sleeves only featured lace, while the rest of the dress had lace on top of the flowing white satin. "Do you like it?" Kalia asks nervously. "I love it," I whisper, running my hand along the lace. "It's perfect." Kalia and Astra help me into the dress, buttoning it up at the back. Kalia starts crying, and Astra hands her a tissue. If I didn't know better, I would say that even Astra's eyes were lined with tears. Astra gently pins a veil of the same lace pattern back in my hair. "What's the something old?" I ask Kalia curiously. Kalia frowns. "He didn't tell you." "Tell me what?" I ask in confusion. Kalia takes my hand and runs her thumb over my engagement ring. "The ring?" she says softly. "It was our mother's." My hand covers my mouth. "Oh, Finineian," I wail, even though she herself has tears streaming down her face. "Calia, stop crying and go fix your makeup. We have to get ready, too," Astra says, but she definitely has tears of her own falling down her face. Kalia nods, blowing her nose with a tissue. "I can't help it. I can't believe this is really happening." "Neither could I."

Dean whistles as I walk downstairs with Astra and Kalia, the latter of whom has informed me that the wedding will be taking place outside. "You look stunning, Onixa," Ronan says, smiling at me from beside Dean. I blush. "Thanks, Ro. Your bridesmaid doesn't look too terrible herself," Willis adds, his gaze focused on Astra, who flips him off, but locks her arm in his. "If only we could say the same about the other one." Dean shakes his head sadly at Kalia, who wears a light green gown that matches Astras. With her blonde hair in loose curls and pearl clips pinning the front of her hair back, "She looks beautiful." "Shut up, Dean," Kalia says, rolling her eyes. "We both know that I'm hot as hell. Also, for the record, I'm the maid of honor." Dean scoffs as Kalia links her arms with Ronin, who wears the same outfit as the other men, a tan suit with a bow tie that matches her and Astra's dresses. "A self-appointed position, no doubt." I giggle. "He's not wrong. Kalia did appoint herself as my maid of honor, but I wouldn't have had it any other way." Kalia flips him off. "You're lucky we have to start walking or I'd give your scar a friend." My heart pounds as we walk outside just around the corner from the ceremony. I hear people chattering excitedly. Kalia told me that all of the rogues in the house were thrilled to go to a wedding, especially Finian's. Finian, my mate soon, my husband. Music starts and Ronin and Calia walk around the corner, their arms linked together as they walk down the aisle I can't yet see. Willis and Astra follow them, and my heart feels like it's going to jump out of my throat. Dean interlocks his arm with mine, my escort down the aisle. I didn't have a father, and when Kalia had asked me who I wanted to walk me down the aisle, I immediately thought of Dean. Dean, the hilarious and most times inappropriate wolf, whom I had come to love just as much as his brother. The wolf was the first person to make me smile when I was in the darkest place of my life. The wolf who had wiped my memories of Fineian when I asked and the one who gave them back just as easily. The reason we were here today. "Last chance to ditch Finnegan," Dean whispers as we wait to turn the corner. "I could treat you just as well if you can get past the scar." I laugh, but it sounds wrong because I'm so nervous my throat is closing. "Don't let me fall," I tell him, feeling my legs wobble. His eyes soften as his grip on my arm tightens. The only thing holding me upright. Then the part of the song that Kalia told us to turn the corner at begins, and I almost pass out as Dean takes the first step, pulling me along with him, and I lay my eyes on my mate.

Chapter 61

Finineian. The most beautiful man I had ever laid my eyes on. The man with the biggest heart who was now looking at me from the altar. The wedding decor was perfect. The guests, all of the rogues in the house, were sitting in white chairs with flowers along the back. The aisle was lined with blue and green flower petals covering nearly every inch. The altar where Fineian, Calia, Ronin, Astra, and Willis stand, looking at me with big smiles, had a delicate wooden white arch with poppies stuck in the intricate swirls. Dean takes another step, pulling me with him. If not for his arm, I would have collapsed. Even now, my knees shook with nervousness as I stared at my gorgeous mate. His curls were neatly styled, and he wore a tan suit with a white undershirt, just like the others, but he had a light green tie instead of a bow tie. It matched his eyes perfectly. His eyes, mind you, were filled with tears as Dean and I walked down the aisle. When I finally reach the end of the aisle, Dean squeezes my hand before taking his place behind Fineian in the center of the altar to officiate the wedding. Fineian apologized for being short on priests, but said that Dean would have to do. Fine takes my hands, and the sight of him, even with tears falling down his face, is so beautiful it makes my heart clench tightly. "Hi," he whispers, low enough for only me to hear. "Hi back," I whisper, amazed that I can even form words right now. He squeezes my hands, which tremble slightly. If not for Calia and Astra's threats, I know I would be crying too.

"Dearly beloved, dearly demented," Dean begins, his voice bellowing through the clearing. "We are gathered here today for the wedding of one Onixa Knight and Finnegan." Ronin coughs and shoots his twin a warning glare. "I mean Finley," Dean corrects with a dazzling smile. "Varicus. Today marks the most beautiful day in the history of his house because we get to witness the unification of the two most kind-hearted and beautiful people I know. All of us have been deeply affected because of the handsome," he winks at Fineian, who rolls his eyes, "groom standing before us. His generosity is only matched by his mate's and after today, his wife." Finine squeezes my hands again, looking at me with so much adoration in his eyes. I almost crumble underneath them. "It's rare that two people share a love like they do. Patient, kind, and beautiful. When a love like this exists, it must be cherished, revered above all else. I cannot imagine two people more suited for each other, more perfectly matched. Anyone would be so lucky to find someone who loves them the way these two love each other. Today only marks the day of marriage," Dean says, slightly choked up. "May today be the first of many days they share celebrating their love with those around them. To get to witness these two grow and love is a privilege. May they never stop being an example of everything beautiful about the world. Everything we should strive to be." Holding back tears has never been so hard as when Dean says these words, and as my mate smiles at me, I have never known so much happiness.

"The lovely couple would like to take a few minutes to say their vows before kissing," Dean says, and a few people in the crowd chuckle, and Kalia snorts. "Onixa, ladies first." I take a deep breath, and Finineian reassuringly squeezes my hand. I had spent hours trying to figure out what to say before deciding ultimately to wing it. When you love someone that much, the words come naturally, and they do. "As my mate often likes to remind me," I begin, and Fineian's eyes shine. "My first word to him was, 'Pretty.'" Fine chuckles, as do the people in the crowd. Dean nods in agreement. "And while it's true that Fineian is the most beautiful person I've ever laid my eyes on," I say, and Fineian winks at me. "He would only be half as beautiful if his heart were ugly. His physical beauty pales in comparison to the beauty of his heart. I have never met someone with a bigger heart, a kinder soul. There are days when I wake up unable to believe that I've been blessed with such a kind and patient partner. My grandmother once told me that once you find your mate, you will never know loneliness. And she was right. Fine has seen me at my worst, during the lowest points of my life." My voice cracks as I think of Gradon, and Finineian softly strokes my hand with his thumb, perfectly in tune with my soul. "But he was also the reason I got out of those dark days. Finine is the sun. Everything under his care blossoms, grows, and I have been lucky enough to be under his care during those dark times. He taught me what it truly means to love someone, to be patient, kind above all else, and have hope when things seem bleak. Every day, he shows me the value in being kind, and being a bright spot for everyone, no matter how dark their day may be. Being kind is a form of strength, never a weakness. There are no words to describe how much he means to me, to tell all he has done for me. He transformed the tatters of my old life into something beautiful, healing the wounds of my heart and replacing them with flowers. If I spend 100 years or a thousand with him, it will not have been enough. But being with him here and now is a good place to start. I love you," I tell him, and pull one of my hands away to wipe the tears from his face. "Always." Dean sniffles and Ronan's body quietly shakes from sobs.

"Groom, your vows," Dean prompts, his voice cracking. "The day I met my mate was the best and worst day of my life," Finian starts. "And I already know I'm going to cry. It was the best because finally my heart was completed and my soul wasn't alone anymore. It was also the worst because the day I found her was also the day I lost her. But it doesn't matter because I would have spent years waiting for her. However long it would have taken for just a fraction of the joy I feel today, it would have been worth the wait." Tears stream down my face, and all I can do is hope that Kalia had the foresight to make my makeup waterproof. "Ona likes to act like my kindness is akin only to me. But she couldn't be more wrong," he smiles slightly at me, and I cry harder. "Onixa has the purest heart I have ever seen because she has faced true darkness but does not yield to it. Every day she amazes me with her strength. To be strong when your entire world has fallen apart is a different kind of strength. It would have been easy for her to fall apart with it, but she pulled herself out of the depths of despair. And I know she would have done it with or without me. It would have been easy, too easy for her to give into the darkness, to choose the path of least resistance. But through everything, she has stayed in the light, choosing to treat people with absurd amounts of kindness, even those who don't deserve it." He says, "And I cry harder when I think of the so when she says things about my kindness, it's hard to believe that someone like her could see herself as anything but what she really is. My son, the light of my life, fosters beauty and growth with everything she touches. I will never stop being the man she sees. I will never stop trying to be someone worthy of her. For as long as we both shall live, I will never stop loving the woman who has shown me what true strength is. I vow only to give you books with happy endings. I vow to always treat you with the kindness you deserve. I vow to love you until the end of time." I try to swallow my sobs, but it does nothing to stop the tears that flow from my eyes. To have someone who has seen every aspect of myself and still loves me is nothing short of a miracle. "I love you, Ona," he says softly and wipes my tears as I had done for him, always. I hear the sniffles through the audience, especially from Kalia. Dean wipes his tears with the sleeve of his coat. "Calia, hand me the rings before I ball like a damn fool," he says, his voice croaky. Kalia hands him the box with our wedding rings, something Finineian has also taken care of. "Do you Finley Varicus Teixen Knight as your lawfully wedded wife in sickness and in health for as long as you both shall live?" he asks through sniffles. Fine grins at me. "Always a bright light in my days." "The son I do," he says, and I put the ring on his shaking finger. "And do you, Onixa Knight, take Finley Varicus as your lawfully wedded husband in sickness and in health for as long as you both shall live?" The most straightforward question of my life. "I do," I say, and my voice cracks as my mate slides the ring on my finger. Dean smiles victoriously. "Then get kissing."

"We do." Calia had made an enormous feast, something Dean complained about, but it didn't stop him from shoveling food into his mouth as we sat around a white-clothed round table. Fine and I sat next to each other, his hand not letting go of me for a minute. Ronin sat next to me and Kalia next to Finine. Astra was on Kalia's right, sitting on Willis's lap. Ronin was unfortunate enough to sit next to Dean, who was likely already drunk. We all had been downing champagne, my cheeks flushed from the alcohol I desperately needed to calm my nerves. Could you blame me? I'm married to the most perfect man on Earth. Married. Married to a man only found in fairy tales, making even the man I dreamed about marrying when I was younger look terrible in comparison. Everything I could ever want. Everything I could ever ask for. "Why are you looking at me like that, Mrs. Varicus?" Fine teases, squeezing my hand. I shake my head in disbelief, a grin on my face. "I just can't believe this is happening." He kisses my cheek. "I'll never stop thinking this is a dream. If it is, then I hope to never wake up." Dean snorts. "Honeymoon stage," he whispers to Ronin, who rolls his eyes. "Speaking of, where are you love birds going?" "Fiji," Finian answers smoothly, and I look at him in shock. "We leave in a week from tomorrow." Astra skulls and punches Willis. "You only took me to Canada. I don't even like the cold." Willis sighs and turns to Finineian. "Thanks for setting an impossibly high expectation for the rest of us mated males." "Fine," and I laugh. He really makes every other male look like a peasant. Dean stands up. "Time for speeches," he says, grinning evilly, and I groan. Dean hits his champagne glass with his knife and accidentally shatters it. "Whoops," he mutters. "Sorry, Finnegan." Finian sighs. All of the wolves turn to look at Dean sitting at their own tables. "We're going to take a few minutes to say a few words about the lovely wetted couple. Obviously, since I'm the officiant and also the most handsome, I'll go first." Fine sighs again. "Ona has had Finine by the balls since the day they met," Dean begins, and Kalia snorts while the others laugh. "It's a good thing she came along because Fineian was getting really naggy. Dean, wash your dishes after you use them. Dean, stop burning ants with a magnifying glass. Dean, stop." "The point, Dean," Finian says through laughter. "Get to it before we're all senile, please." "Oh, right. Sorry, Finnegan." He does a drunken mocking bow, making me giggle. "The point is, I have never seen my best friend more happy than he is with Onixa. I can't wait to spend more days hitting on Onixa to make him mad. And I can't wait for the day that there's little Finnick babies running around the cabin that call me Uncle Dean." "Finenix," I mouth to Finineian, who chuckles and shrugs. I didn't miss the way his eyes glowed when Dean mentioned us having children. "All right, that's enough out of you," Ronan mutters, standing up and putting his hand on Dean's shoulder before shoving him back in his chair. "My turn." My heartbeat quickens. I never heard Ronin say more than a few words at a time, and certainly not in front of a large crowd. "I don't really like talking, especially in front of people," Ronan says, echoing my thoughts. "But I would forever regret not taking a minute to share some thoughts about my two dearest friends." My heart squeezes at his kind words. "When Finineian told me that he found his mate, my first thought was a prayer, hoping that she was just as amazing as him, that she was worthy of such a kind male. And when I met her, I realized that she was." Ronin pauses to smile at me. "Onixa is the only person in the world that I could see with Fineian. And not just because she's the only one of you lot that helps with my garden." Ronin scowls, and some of the other wolves yell out apologies and laughter. "I have never seen two people so in sync with each other. Two people who love each other in such a beautiful way." Ronin's voice cracks. "When I lost my mate, I didn't think that kind of love existed anymore. Now I can see that it does. May they spend the rest of their days showing all of us what true love looks like." Ronin lifts his glass, and the rest of the wolves toast to his words. Kalia tries to make her speech next, but cries too hard to say much of anything, and Astra gets off of Willis's lap to comfort her. "I'd like to say something," Hudson says softly, standing up, and Fine grins at him. "When I first saw Finian and Onixa in the woods, I thought that they were angels," Hudson says, his eyes glassy. "And then the more I talked to them, the more I realized how right I was. They have completely saved my life. When they found me, I had nothing but the clothes on my back. I was utterly alone and had nowhere to go. Finian gave me a home, a family, a life. There's no way to pay him back for all he's done, all he's given me. Seeing him so happy with Onixa is proof that good people get what they deserve. I can't wait to see how they change the world." Hudson says, his eyes watering as he lifts his glass. Fine kisses me softly on the cheek as we toast. "I love you always," he says, using his mind-link to me for the first time. A few more of the wolves say a few words, and as they talk about how much Finineian has changed their life, and how thankful they are that he's found his mate, my heart feels like it may burst from how much happiness fills it. By the time they finish, the sun has begun to set, painting the sky a pink and orange hue. "We're like that, you know," he said to me when he kidnapped me the second time. "The kind of people who take the time to watch the sunset." I couldn't believe how much had changed since then. Now we're watching the sunset over our wedding. Family and friends surrounding us. "Time for the lovely couple to share their first dance," Kalia says excitedly, pulling Fineian and me to the center of the clearing. The wolves pushed all of the tables to the side and lit candles. Kalia begins the music, a slow song full of loving words. Fine wraps his arms around my waist and I put my arms around his neck as we dance slowly to the song. "I have to apologize," Fineian says suddenly as he stares deeply into my eyes. "Oh," I laugh. He nods seriously. "I haven't told you yet how beautiful you look." "Hmph," I say, pretending to think. "A shame you'll spend your first night as my husband sleeping on the couch." Fine laughs, nestling his face in my neck, sending chills through my body. "And despite that we have an audience, it feels like we're the only two people on Earth." "A well-deserved punishment," he agrees, kissing my neck softly. My husband, my mate, the man who pulled me out of the darkness and kept me in the light. For the rest of my life, I would never stop trying to make it up to him. "I wouldn't have changed a single thing," Fineian says to me through our mind-link, echoing my thoughts. "Every single moment brought us together. It was worth it all."

When the song ends, people whoop and cheer loudly before pulling each other onto the dance floor. "Finnegan, give my broken heart a sliver of that kindness everyone keeps talking about and let me dance with the prettiest girl in the world," Dean requests from next to us. Fineian sighs and looks at me apologetically. "Hand her over," Dean repeats, smirking arrogantly. Fineian sighs again and releases me from his grasp. "You better keep your hands in a respectable place or I'll dust you," Fine threatens, and I laugh. "Yeah. Yeah." Dean waves him off before grabbing my hand and pulling me into his chest. Kalia tugs on Finine, dancing goofily with him. "Well, Onixa, are you regretting your decision yet?" Dean says, his hands on my waist. "I'm willing to forgive you for marrying Fineian if you just give me a single kiss." Fine pauses his dancing with Kalia to growl at him. Dean and I laugh, still holding to that promise to annoy him for the rest of our lives. "Huh?" I giggle. Dean picks me up and spins me before planting a kiss on my cheek, making me squeal and wipe it off. It's too much fun to resist. Once the song ends, Dean begrudgingly passes me off to Ronin, who was much less affectionate with his dancing than his twin. For the next few hours, all of us dance to the music, drinking, only taking a break to cut the cake, which Dean used his piece to smash in Calia's face. Once everyone is tired to the point of nearly passing out, people come up to Finineian and me to thank us for the wedding and wish us a lifetime of happiness. Once everyone is back in the house and it's just Finineian, me, and the stars, he gently kisses me. "I love you," I tell him for the millionth time today. But his eyes glow with happiness just like they did the first time. "Always." "Always," he whispers against my mouth before whisking me into the house. Needless to say, I didn't make him sleep on the couch.

Chapter 62.

I woke up with a heart feeling just as full as it had been the night before. My mate and husband slept beside me, or rather underneath me peacefully. Not wishing to wake him after a particularly long night, I gently untangle myself, careful to listen to his unbroken deep breaths. I tiptoe into the closet, pulling on a pair of shorts and one of his hoodies. When I look back at the bed, I'm surprised to see that it's empty. The covers haphazardly thrown to the side. I yelp when an arm wraps around my waist and soft kisses fall on my shoulder. "You know, you don't have to sneak out of my bed anymore," I think it's quite common for married couples to share a bed," my mate says, smirking against my skin as his kisses move along my neck. I laugh, turning around to face him. "Don't do that. You nearly gave me a heart attack." Fineian joins my laughter. "Apologies, my wife, but I do wish you wouldn't so guiltily tiptoe around our room to avoid me." I smack his chest gently. "I wasn't avoiding you," I correct. "I just didn't want to wake you. Even though you don't seem to mind keeping me awake half the night with your loud snoring." Fine snorts and lightly blushes. "I don't snore." I smile. "I know, but I like the look on your face when I say you do." Fineian chuckles, pulling me into his arms. "So, is there a reason you felt the need to interrupt my snoring self? As far as I'm concerned, this is our temporary honeymoon, and I don't plan on letting you out of bed until our real one." I roll my eyes at his teasing. "I have to go help Ronin clean up the clearing. It's infringing on his garden, and we all know how that will end." "Uh," Fineian says, kissing my temple. "It would indeed be a shame if you spent all of our time in Fiji nursing a particularly nasty wound. I'd like to think that Ronin would be gentleman enough to heal it before you whisk me off into the sunset." I giggle, always enjoying jokes made about our family. "As that may be," Fine draws. "I'm going to enforce my authority as your husband and authority." I snort. "It's not much, but it's there," he teases as he tweaks my nose. "As I was saying, I'm going to have to enforce that authority and demand that you wait until after you eat breakfast to tackle the disaster outside." I hum. "You're really letting that power go to your head. What a megalomaniac you've become." "I'll try not to let it," he amends sarcastically. "But seriously, breakfast, no arguments, or I'll get Dean to set fire to the garden and tell Ronin it was you." I laugh. "I didn't realize I married such a master manipulator." Fine growls playfully and places one more kiss on my lips. "I'll see you downstairs in a minute."

I go downstairs to the kitchen where Dean sits at the table, leaning over a cup of coffee. "Hard night?" I tease when I notice the dark circles under his eyes and the slightly green tinge his pale face holds. Dean groans. "I knew that second bottle of tequila was a mistake. The first mistake of many that night." "Oh, get a little too swept up in the allure of weddings. Did we know?" I joke, pouring a cup of coffee for myself. Dean shakes his head in remorse. "They always get you that way." "Well, sit tight," I tell him, ruffling his hair. "I'll make some breakfast." Dean perks up at that. "You cook?" I shrug. "I've seen a lot of cooking shows. If that counts." Putting his face in his hands, Dean mumbles, "Maybe I should just take my chances with Kalia's abominations." "She tries to pass off his food." I smack the back of his head. "No more out of you or you'll have to make your own damn food. Apologies, Nicks." He grins childishly and watches as I get to work, making a plate of omelets for the always hungry gaggle of wolves that would undoubtedly appear at the smell of food. When I give Dean his omelette, he groans after taking the first bite. "Oh, Onixa baby. I always knew there was a reason I wanted you for myself besides annoying Finnegan." As if on cue, Finine and Kalia walk in. "Seriously, Dean? Not even 24 hours of being married and you're already making my wife cook for you." With his mouth full of food, Dean responds. "Finnegan, I will give you anything you want in return for you letting me keep her." Kalia snorts and I roll my eyes. "I think I'll have to pass on the offer. Thanks," Fine responds sarcastically and takes the plate of omelets from my hand and sets it on the table, pulling me into the chair next to him. Ronin walks in, still in his pajamas and blinking sleepily. "Ronin, you better get an omelette before I eat them all," Dean warns, already on his second one. Ronin hesitates. "Not hungry." "Kelly," I didn't make them. "Oh, in that case I'm starving," Ronan says, sitting down at the table and taking one for himself, smiling apologetically at Kalia. For the rest of breakfast, Fineian and I listen to Dean and Kalia's various arguments, most of which have to do with making a petition to ban Kalia from the kitchen for all of eternity. "I feel that now is a good time to apologize for involving you in all of this," Finny in mind links me with a wink. "I'm still wondering if it's worth it," I respond with a wink of my own. "Oh, great. Another Willis and Astra," Dean groans while watching Fineian and me talk to ourselves. "You love birds make me sick." "I think that's the tequila," I suggest, and Dean waves his fork at me. "You certainly didn't think they were sickening when you were talking about Finnick babies last night," Ronan says with a coy smile. "Ooh. Dibs on being their godparent," Kalia squeals. Dean blanches. "No freaking way. I've been there from the beginning. I'm going to be Dean Jr.'s godparent." Fine and I exchange a look and burst out laughing. This, of course, sends Dean and Calia into an argument over who our unborn unconceived child should be.

Named after. And even Ronin gets involved, saying he should get the honors because he knows that he would be the one getting stuck with changing the diapers. Idol failed to notice Finine's excitement through our bond during the conversation.

After spending most of the day helping Ronin clean up the clearing and using my magic to do it, Finine and I were sitting in the library reading after we watched the sunset. Fine sat in his armchair and I lay on the ground with my legs over his lap. I finish A Tale of Two Cities and tears line my eyes. "You lied?" I accuse him sitting upright. He pulls me into his lap. "Did I?" He asks beusedely. "What have I lied about, wife?" "You said you would only give me books with happy endings." I wave the book in the air. "This is certainly not a happy ending." Finian chuckles, kissing my eyebrow. "I think Darné and Lucy would disagree." I scoff. "Oh, and just forget Carton." Fine closes his book after dog earing the page he was on. "He died for a worthy cause. That makes the ending happy, never sad." I shake my head vehemently. "I think we need to work on your definition of a happy ending." "Are we having our first marriage spat?" Fine inquires, raising an eyebrow in amusement. "First of many," I tease and suddenly remember the conversation at breakfast. "I have a question." Fine sigh as he sets his book down. "I know I'm new at this husband thing, but even I know that when a girl says they have a question, it's never a good thing." "This morning at breakfast, what Dean and Kalia said," I say hesitantly, not sure how to ask. "Don't worry, Nyx. Obviously, Finn and Junior will have Ronin as a godparent. Picking anyone else would be seriously irresponsible," he jokes, still not grasping what I'm asking about. "Pups," I blurt out. "Would you want them?" Fine's eyes soften. "Of course, Onixa. Only if you do, obviously." "When?" I ask curiously. "Because you know we haven't been." Fine's eyes widen as he realizes what I'm implying. "Do you think that you're—" "No," I quickly say, and he looks disappointed by my answer, but it could always happen. As they say, it only takes one time. Fine kisses my cheek. "Ona, whether we have pups a year from now or 10 doesn't matter to me. I would be equally happy if you decided you didn't want any at all. All I need is you. The rest can sort itself out." "I do," I say softly. "Want them. A lot of them. Especially if they look like you." Vinian's eyes shine with tears as I feel happiness through our bond, and I know he was lying about being fine if I didn't want any. He leans in to kiss me when Astra bursts through the library door, nearly sending it off its hinges. "Finine, I need to talk to you." I don't know what it involves, but Fineian seems to as he nods in understanding. "Be right there," he tells Astra, who practically sprints out the door. "I'll be back in a few hours," he says, kissing my forehead as he gets up and puts me back in the armchair. "Keep my side of the bed worm, will you?" "Wait," I say, grabbing his hand. "Where are you going?" Finian smiles at me sadly. "I'm making sure our pups have a safe land to play in." He apologizes before quickly leaving, leaving me in complete shock. Had he made another deal with the moon goddess? One to grant him his enchanted lands without me having to kill anyone?

That night, I tried to sleep, but I'm restless, worried about Fineian. He hadn't returned yet. I decided to go looking for him, even though I had a feeling he wouldn't want me to. I check every room in the house without rogues staying in them, but still can't find him. I even checked the garden, but he's nowhere to be found. And then I remember the jail. I walk a little further, retracing the path we took to get there the first time. Eventually, I come across the small building. I hear noises coming from inside. "Turn around, Onixa." A voice in my head says, "Go back inside and go back to sleep. You don't want to know what's going on in there." I hesitate, my hand on the knob. I had a bad feeling about going inside, but something was drawing me in. Later, I realized that it was fate. When I open the door, I'm shocked by what I see. "Not what I see. A who?" My mate looks at me guilty. "Finian, why do you have the blood alpha locked in your cell?" Chapter 63. "Onixa, I can explain." Terror floods my body as I look at the blood alpha who's badly beaten and bloody, slumped in the corner of one of the cells. He's chained to the wall tightly in silver restraints. "Do you realize what you've done?" I hiss in fear. "The blood Luna will come after us." "Ona, it's the only way." Fine grabs my hands, his eyes pleading. "The moon goddess has promised that if we find a way to hold Arriio until the eclipse is over, she'll grant us our protected lands." "In case you didn't notice, that's not Arriio," I yell. Fine shakes his head slowly. "She will come for him. We told her to surrender herself for—" "Or what? You'll harm him?" "Fine. This isn't right." I speak slowly and "Arriia will come and she will destroy us for taking her mate. I wasn't necessarily a fan of Cynan, but he had been kind to me while visiting Blue Moon. He certainly didn't deserve to suffer." Fine grabs the side of my face. "Ona, I promise everything will be fine. I have help. You don't have to do a single thing. Just let us handle this." "You're crazy," I hiss. "Let Cayenne go right now. You will bring disaster on our doorstep if you don't." "Ona, please," Fine begs. "You have to understand why I'm doing this. We only have to hold him for tomorrow. Once Aizio surrenders herself and after the eclipse is over, we'll have Dean wipe their memories and we'll let them go. Nobody has to get hurt." "I gesture to Kynan. He already did." "Fine. Please," I say calmly, my eyes pleading for him to understand how bad an idea this is. "Please let him go. If you don't, you might as well start digging our graves right now." Fine shakes his head. "I can't, Donixa. For us, for our future." "You're crazy," I tell him. "I'm letting the blood alpha go before Arriio finds out we took him." I go to the cell, but it's locked. "Finian, give me the keys," I say calmly, but I'm shaking in fear. Fine looks at me, his eyes wide. I try to drain the life from outside of the prison, but the cement walls are too thick and I can't. And then I attack my husband. I swing at him, but he's fast, too fast, and too much stronger than me. He easily holds my wrists with one of his hands, and I hear his keys jingle. "No, no, no." He gently pushes me towards the cell, and when I whip my head around to look at him in terror, his eyes are conflicted, apologetic. I struggle in his grasp, but it's like iron as he opens the cell and nudges me in before releasing me and closing the gate behind me. He locks me in the cell with the blood alpha. "Fine." I whisper in disbelief. Fine looks at me guilty, his face full of remorse. "I'm so sorry, my love. I can't have you trying to free him. Not until the eclipse is over. I promise, Ona. Everything will be okay. He's chained up. He won't be able to hurt you in there." "Fine," I say calmly. Even though I feel anything but "you're not thinking clearly. You have to let us out." A tear slips out of the corner of Fineian's eyes. "I'm so sorry," he whispers, his voice cracking. And he turns around and leaves me alone with the blood alpha. I pace around the cell as much as I can, careful to avoid the blood alpha, who watches me curiously. I thought he was unconscious when Fineian and I were arguing, but once I was in the cell, his eyes opened. I go to the gate of the cell and reach my hands out to try tugging on it even though the bars look thick. "Don't," Kynan warns me, his voice quiet. I ignore him and pull on the bars and instantly searing pain fills my hands. I cry out in pain. "It's made out of silver," Kynan states, no inflection in his voice. I glare at him. "Obviously," Kynan says, "I tried to warn you." I ignore him, hitting the walls of the cell to no avail. Without my magic, I'm useless. "Who is that?" Kynan asks curiously. He doesn't seem bothered by the fact that all of his limbs are wrapped in silver chains, even though I can smell burnt flesh. "My mate," I spit out. Son's eyes flash in realization. And I think for a minute he may try telling me that Theren is my mate, but he doesn't. "Your mate locked you in a prison cell with a dangerous alpha?" he asks in shock. I glare at him. "Didn't you hurt your mate? Seems like you're not in the position to judge him." Kynan wisely doesn't respond. I sigh, sitting against the wall of the cell, as far away from Kynan as I can, even though he can't move much. Strangely, I wasn't scared of him. I didn't think he would hurt me. "Arriio, however, will slaughter everyone involved," Cayenne plainly states, echoing my thoughts. "I know," I whisper. "Can't you use your magic to get us out?" Cen asks, probably remembering that I have black magic from the time I used it to hurt his mate. I want to throttle him. "Don't you think I've already tried that?" I snap. "I can't drain anything outside of this room. There are always small life forms that I could drain the energy from. Bugs, microorganisms, but not enough for me to have enough magic to get us out." Kynan looks at me inquisitively. "You're different now." "Really? You're just as annoying as I remember," I hiss, not really sure why I'm trying to poke the bear. "What can I say? Being locked in a cell by your mate puts you in a foul mood." Kynan looks at me in appraisal. "I didn't say it was bad." I ignore him for the next few hours, but I can't tell how much time has gone by. There's no window in the cell, and I was sure that soon enough the eclipse would occur, which means Arriio is already on her war path. Fine returns a few hours later, bringing food for Cynan and me. Cayenne tears through his food, eating all of it immediately, and I can't get over how calm he seems to be about being imprisoned. "Eat, Onixa." Fine pleads when I don't touch the food. "I will when you let me out of here," I yell, and he flinches. He looks heartbroken. "Only a few more hours, my love." Tears spill out of my eyes. "Fine, please. I hope you'll forgive me for this someday," he whispers painfully before leaving again. None of us s would live long enough to see that day, especially since Arriio is coming. I sit back against the wall for the next few hours. Kynan dozes off completely relaxed. And why wouldn't he be? He knows just as well as I do that Arriio is capable of tearing all of us apart without a second thought. When he wakes up, he looks momentarily confused before remembering all that occurred. "Why does Arisio want to kill the moon goddess?" I ask him curiously. "Might as well get some answers before I die." Son's gaze turns pained for the first time, despite his burning flesh and multiple wounds. "She was promised pups if she does." I snort. "Killing a god seems an extreme price to pay for that." A shadow falls over Son's face. "You don't know, Arriio. There's nothing she wouldn't do for a pup of her own. No line she wouldn't cross. Nobody she wouldn't destroy." "Does it bother you?" I ask curiously "that your mate is a cruel monster who kills people just because she can." Kynan shrugs. "Not particularly." I snarl at him and his eyes soften as he looks at me for some reason. "For the record, I have tried to get her to stop killing rogues," he says quietly after a few moments. "I doubted that, though I didn't know what he would have to gain from lying about that. Seriously, I only support killing rogues if they cross into my territory," he states, "I've told her not to." "Something tells me that if you wanted to stop her from doing something, you would be able to," I retort. Kynan blinks twice and then erupts into laughter. "Oh, young wolf." Kynan shakes his head once he stops laughing. "You have so much left to learn." I glare at him, reminded of Arriio's words the night she tried to harm Gray. "There's a lot you don't understand. Why did she kill Brenda?" I ask suddenly and Son's eyes flash in recognition. "She had already submitted. There was no reason for her to do that." "Because she wanted to," Kynan says, and I noticed that his voice raised slightly at the end. "You're lying." I narrow my eyes. Kynan says, "Young wolf, you do not want to know. Trust me on this." Something in his voice makes me hesitate, but not enough to stop me. "Tell me." Kynan stares at me. "The sheolf suffered a fatal wound to her neck during the fight. She was about one more minute away from dying after she submitted." "I don't get it," I stammer out. "Brenda was bleeding a lot from her neck, but she was alive. She—" "We heard her heartbeat slowing down. Your weak hearing abilities wouldn't have been able to detect it, but we did. Arriio killed the sheolf so that you wouldn't have to live with knowing you killed someone. Arriio knew you couldn't handle it," he tells me. I shake my head slowly. "I—" "Arriio. She wouldn't." Cenne gives me a look I don't recognize. "She's not as unfeeling as she makes herself out to be. She's still a sociopath," I tell him "anyone who kills as much as she does has serious issues. I wondered what had happened to her to make her that way." Kynan size. "I know."

Chapter 64. About an hour later, I hear two people arguing outside the prison. One of them I realize is Finineian, though I can't make out what he's saying. The other voice is entirely foreign to me. "What are they saying?" I whisper to Kynan, whose eyes are focused. "Sh," he says, and I roll my eyes. Eventually, the fighting stops. "Who is Fineian arguing with?" I ask him once it's been silent for a while. Kynan looks annoyed. "Wilton's bratty son. He must have been working with your mate against Arriio." "Wilton's son? Wilton was the former alpha of Red Crescent before Arriio killed him. So, his son must be next in line for the position until Arriio deals with him as well. How would Finine even know him?" I ask in confusion. "He avoids Pax. I doubt he would have approached a future alpha." Kynan considers my question. "The moon goddess probably has been communicating with the two of them and brought them together to stop Arriio." "I'm sorry," I apologize lowly. "I knew that the moon goddess wanted Ariseio gone. She tried to get me to kill her myself a few weeks ago." Kynan looks at me blankly. "I said no," I say defensively, squirming under his intense stare. "Why?" Kynan asks curiously. "You would be able to end the entire Bloodlake situation easily with your dark gift if you wanted to." "Why indeed?" Ariseio certainly had given me more than enough reasons to take action and yet I couldn't bring myself to do it. I avoid his question. "What were they talking about?" I ask nervously. Kynan size. "Sebastian wants to end me now instead of waiting for the eclipse to start. Says that Arzia will be weakened if our bond is broken." "And what did Fineian say?" He looks thoughtful. "He said that nobody is going to die today. Seemed adamant about that." I exhale in relief. Maybe, just maybe, if Kynan weren't harmed, Arriio would have mercy. "Unlikely." Kynan looks at me curiously. "Your mate Finine. Do you love him more than you love Theren?" "Yes," I answer simply. Cynen looks disappointed by my answer. I'm guessing because Theren is his cousin. And then Sinon's eyes widen as he looks at me. His nostrils flare and his face suddenly looks anxious. "Ona, did you complete the mating bond with Fineian?" He asks slowly. I roll my eyes. "Yes, Durkquad. Not that it's any of your business. If this is about Theren, then you should know that." "It's not about Theren," he says harshly. "You have to get out of here right now." I look around the cell. "And not to be rude, but the whole point of Fineian locking me in a prison is so that I can't get out." "You have to get out of here now," Kynan hisses, his voice desperate. "Beg Finine. Do whatever you have to do. You can't be here." His words confuse me and quite honestly terrify me. He hadn't even looked this troubled when he was talking about his own death. I'm about to ask him what the hell is going on when I hear more shouting. "What are they saying?" I implore Kynan. His eyes darken. "Sebastian has decided to end me now. The eclipse just started. But Arriio—" "I start to say, but he cuts me off. "Ona, listen to me." He says seriously, his gaze intense, and I see worry woven in his expression. "Things are about to get bloody. If Arriio shows up and I'm already dead, tell her the name Draen." "Draen? What? Kynan, what are you even—" "She won't harm you if you tell her the name. Ona, promise me you'll remember the name." Kynan insists, his voice rising. He's really starting to freak me out, so I go along with it. "Okay, fine. I'll tell her the name, but you're not going to." The jail door slams open, and an angry-looking blonde guy with golden hair walks in. For some reason, he has a black symbol of some kind drawn on his face. He must be Sebastian. Fine follows close behind. "Sebastian, stop. We agreed that nobody gets hurt," he says calmly, but he looks worried. "The eclipse has begun, and Arriio isn't here yet. She's already gone to take care of Seline. I'm ending Kynan now," Sebastian snars. "Give me the keys." "No," Fineian says, his voice firm. Sebastian shrugs and stabs my mate with a dagger. I scream and Finine crumples to the ground, groaning. The dagger is embedded in the middle of his chest, and blood pours out like a river. The dagger is silver, and the smell of the wolf's bane coating, it made my nose burn. I can practically see the life draining out of him. Thanks to my dark gift, he's already almost gone. "Ona," Finny in mind links me, coughing up blood as he turns his head to face me. "I'm so sorry for all of this. I hope one day you can forgive me." Tears pour down my face. "Fine. It'll be okay. We can get Ronin here. He can heal you. He can." Fine smiles at me sadly, blood smeared on his lips. "I'm going to die. Ona, I can already see the light. It is a far, far better thing that I do than I have ever done. It is a far, far better rest that I go to than I have ever known." "No, no, no." I recognize the quote from the first book he gave me when he kidnapped me. I finished the book last night. "He died for a worthy cause." I start sobbing as Sebastian reaches into Finian's pocket and pulls out a ring of keys. "Ona, my love." Fine chokes on more blood and his eyes glaze over. "I won't be there to pull you out of the darkness again. You'll have to fight it alone. Promise me you won't go back to that dark place." I can hardly see through all of the tears and my throat tightens to the point of barely being able to breathe. "Fine, I can't do this without you," I sobb. Sebastian finally finds the right key and opens the door victoriously. Rage floods my body. He's killed my mate. I will make him pay. "I'm going to tear you apart," I tell Sebastian as he walks into the cell. I'm kneeling over on the ground, still in unfathomable pain, and Sebastian looks down at me. He snorts. "Your magic is worthless here, witch. Seline warned me you may try to drain my life and gave me a protective rune to paint on my skin." I lift my hand, trying to drain his life force, but he was right. Whatever symbol he painted rendered my magic useless. He snorts again in disgust and I leap off the ground and wrap my hands around his throat. I squeeze, but he easily throws me off. Throws me across the cell and my head smacks back hard into the concrete. Spots line my vision and I'm seeing double. I see Sebastian leaning over Kynan, punching him over and over again. "Who's your alpha now?" He snarls in between punches and then he pulls out a knife. He stabs Kynan once in the stomach, then another time. "I wonder if I make your death painful, Arriio will be able to tell," he muses. Kynan is silent, taking the punches and stabs. He makes eye contact with me, and I know he's reminding me to say the name to Arriio. I can feel Son's life force rapidly depleting. He doesn't have much life left in him. "Run," he mouths. I look out the gate. Sebastian has left it open. And I see my mate's lifeless body on the ground, his eyes frozen open, just like Gradons. It has to end here. Something inside of me snaps. The darkness takes complete control. I drain the life from myself. It hurts badly. I can feel myself begin to wither away, my strength and energy rapidly depleting as darkness swirls in my hands. I throw a ball of my own energy at Sebastian. It knocks him off his feet, and he groans in pain, now a few feet away from Kynan. I expend more of my energy, feeling weaker and weaker with each passing second. And then there's a flash of light, blinding and golden. It burns, burns my skin, and I realize that Sebastian has electrocuted me. Lightning crackles around his arms, concentrated at his hands as he stands up. I rise to my feet, swaying slightly from quite literally taking my own life. "You will pay for everything," I say softly. And I throw my dark magic at Sebastian as he throws his lightning at me. There's a stream of darkness that meets his light as our gifts fight against each other for power. They collide somewhere in the middle between us. Light against dark as energy shoots out of both of us. I'm draining too much of my own energy to keep the light at bay. With each second, our power collides, and I have to take more and more life out of myself. I look at Fineian's face one more time. And then I throw almost all of my life at his killer. There are only a few small, minuscule kernels of life left in me as my darkness overtakes Sebastian's light and delivers him a fatal blow. He dies instantly as the darkness wraps around his heart and pulls it out. It's a kindness he didn't deserve. "No." Cen bellows, tugging against the chains. I use one of my depleting kernels of life to break his chains. It didn't matter. I wouldn't be able to survive with so little life in me. I was nearly empty. Kynan rushes over, leaning over me. "Ona, what have you done?" He whispers in horror. I must be closer to death than I realized because I began to hallucinate that tears were coming out of his eyes. "Promise?" I choke out already beginning to fade away. "Promise that you'll stop Arriio from killing any more rogues. I don't want my death to be in vain." Kynan makes a horrible choking sound. One of his tears falls on my face and I realize that I haven't been hallucinating at all. "I swear my life on it," Kynan whispers, squeezing his eyes shut before opening them. I smile slightly, feeling comforted as the darkness begins to wrap around me, knowing that nobody else will suffer at the hands of the blood Luna. I throw the last kernel of my life at Kynanne, not to hurt him, but to heal him. He looks at me in horror, tears streaming down his face, and the darkness fully envelopes me as I die. The darkness does not scare me. It's a warm welcome embrace.

Chapter 65. Lucian POV. The seer is strange indeed. She would mumble words under her breath as we pushed through the woods after stepping through Alpha Kilmore's portal, sometimes wiping trickling blood from her nose. "Light meets dark," she whispers in horror, and her eyes glaze over. "She chose the darkness. She changed her mind." Alex gives me a look that says, "Don't ask." Yet he looks at the seer with admiration, catching her by the arm when she stumbles over her own feet, distracted by whatever it is she's seeing, and holds her upright until she shakes him off. Strange. Very strange. And then we stand in front of an empty clearing and Cotch halts. The warriors look at her in confusion and I wonder if she has led us into a trap. Arriio certainly didn't seem to trust the young sheolf. "Where's Kynan Cotran?" Alex asks, his voice gentle, like he didn't want to cause her any distress by asking. "It doesn't seem to matter because the seer looks deeply disturbed nonetheless." "It's over," she whispers, her eyes full of pain. "So sorry, young wolf." As she says those cryptic words, a large house suddenly appears in front of us. And two rogues look at us in shock. "Their smell," Alex says, recognition flashing across his face before he switches to a mind link with us. "They're the rogues that have been killing blood like wolves. Kill the girl before she can speak." Warriors pounce on the two rogues before they have a chance to react and tear them apart. And then a small blonde girl walks out of the door. She looks at the rogues and screams. The wolves move to pounce on her, but Alex yells, "Stop!" The wolves halt at his order. Without Kynan or Arriio around, Alex is at the top of the chain of command, and they listen to him like they would to their alphas. Alex stares at the blonde girl who runs to her deceased friends, crying over their bodies, his eyes wide. "Alex," I ask, waiting for him to command us to kill her. "She's my mate," Alex says, his voice barely above a whisper. And he gave the order to kill her friends. He takes long strides to get to her, but Cotch grabs him by the arm and whispers something to him, something that I can't hear. He looks at her briefly before nodding and continuing his pursuit of his mate. The blonde girl's head snaps up as the beta approaches her. She looks confused for a moment before her mouth drops open. "No," she snars. "No, I'll die before letting you drag me to your pack." And she pulls out a knife and holds it to her throat. Alex is quick to grab her by the wrist, and I wonder if Katrine had warned him, trying to stop more bloodshed. The blonde girl's eyes stare deeply into Alex's. "Your emotions," she whispers. "You're so relieved." "Happy?" Alex looks confused by her statement. "I've been looking for you for years." "Of course, I'm happy." And she drops her knife. The seer begins walking away from the scene, following whatever her sight tells her to. and I follow her, leaving the other wolves behind. The seer pauses and turns to look at me. "Lou," she says, using my nickname, despite my never having told her. "Don't follow me. You won't want to see this. Please go back to Alex." Her words send a shiver down my spine, making my blood run cold. "Cautin, what did you see?" "Turn back." "No." Cautron shakes her head sadly. "You should have listened. The way she speaks is odd, although I suppose that's her status as a seer. It would never fail to make the uncomfortable. The way she talks about the future like it's already happened. I follow her until we're outside of a small building, a little ways away from the weird disappearing house. I smell blood. "Lou, go back," Cautin says gently. "I promise you that Kynan is fine. That's all you need to know." No, no, no. It couldn't be. I push past the sear and into the prison. And I see Cen leaning over Onixa. On's lifeless body, what Cotchin was trying to protect me from seeing. "No," I whisper in disbelief and run to her. Her skin is pale and looks gray. Her dark hair spread around her like a halo. Even in death, she looked every bit like the angel she was in life. Kynan looks up at me, his eyes filled with tears. I had never seen him look so human. Only Onixa would be able to humanize the blood alpha like that. "She was pregnant," he whispers in horror, his voice cracking. He turns to look at one of the bodies. And in my pursuit of Onixa, I hadn't noticed that there were two other bodies on the ground. One belonged to Sebastian, the other to a male I hadn't ever seen, but he was the one Kynan was staring at. "They died not knowing that they were with Pup," Kynan says hollowily. and I realize why he was so upset by Onixa's death. He was thinking about Orrizio. Tears stream down my face as I look at Onixa, the last pure soul on the planet, ripped away far too young. She didn't deserve this. "I told her to leave," Cynen yells. And the room suddenly gets warmer as his heat floods. "I told her to leave," he repeats softly. Cayenne didn't say what I already knew, that Onixa died so that he could live. Onixa, selfless beyond measure, her beautiful heart second to none. I knew that about her right away. "There's always a choice." I had told her one time. "She made the wrong choice." Cautin joins us in leaning over the fallen angel. Her eyes filled with tears. "Sweet wolf, may you never know pain again," she whispers, caressing her face. We bury her with her grandmother, her grandmother. Onixa had told me about her grandmother who turned her into a tree, tried to explain why she did it, but she didn't need to. Not to me. I pull Onixa's cold body into my arms, carrying her like a small child. And that's all she was, a child, innocent beyond measure. I never wanted this for her. "The tree is outside. I'll take us there," Katrine says quietly. We follow Katrin into a garden and Kynan picks up a shovel and begins to dig her grave. He hasn't even asked about Arriio yet. Once the hole has been dug under the large cherry tree, I gently place her body in her final resting place. I grow poppies around her. "You promised me poppies." Cotch stifles a sob, her hand covering her mouth. Kynan looks like he's going to throw up. I feel like I'm back in Windalker once again, looking at a beautiful soul taken far too young, far too early. My vision blurs from the tears. Cautran gasps. "She— She chose." The cherry tree starts to wilt right before my eyes until it's blackened and drooping. The poppies have the same fate. I look down at Onixa and her face is no longer gray and pallet. The color has returned, her cheeks and lips pink. And I see her chest rise and fall as she begins to breathe again. "She chose to come back," Katran says in disbelief.

Onix's POV, I'm in complete darkness. And I've never felt more at home. "Ona," a familiar voice I've missed, dearly says. And I see my grandmother Grahams, I say, choking on sobs as I throw my arms around her. She laughs, hugging me back tightly. "I've missed you so much, Nyx." "I missed you," I whisper, breathing in the familiar scent of her. "You have no idea how much I've missed you." Gra pulls away, her eyes shining. "I'm so proud of you, my baby. You've kept your heart pure through it all, choosing kindness over cruelty at every turn. You've grown into a beautiful, strong woman. I couldn't be more proud." My heart warms from her compliments, but I look around and I still only see complete darkness. "Where's Fineian?" I ask her curiously. "He's—" My Graham's grins. "He's your mate. I met him already. Lovely young man. That Finley." "What?" I ask in confusion. "I don't understand." Graham's smile falters slightly. "We're in the in between right now. Fine. We decided it would be better if he crossed over before you got here." "Gra, what are you talking about?" Nothing makes sense. She looks at me sadly. "When he died, I was here waiting for him. We decided that he should cross over to the other side into the afterlife before you got here. It would be too hard for you to go back if you saw him here." "Go back." I repeat. Graham squeezes my hands. "Yes, Onixa. Your bloodlike friends are burying you under my tree right now. Do you know why I chose a cherry tree?" I shake my head. "It symbolizes rebirth. It's not time for you to go into the afterlife yet. You need to choose to go back into your world. And your black magic will drain the life from my tree. I was a healer in life. In combination with your gift and my tree, you will be able to siphon enough energy to come back to life." "No," I whisper in horror. "I'm dead for now," my grandmother corrects, cupping my cheek with her soft hands. "You have to go back, OnX. It's not your time yet." "No, no, no. I can't go back," I sobb, nearly choking on my own tears as my throat tightens. "There's nothing left for me there. I have nobody left. Please, Grahams. Let's go into the afterlife together," I beg. "I can't go back to that world. Not without Fineian." She shakes her head sadly. "You still have so much life left to live, Nyx. So much left to experience, to see. Your life hasn't begun yet." I sobb, my body shaking uncontrollably. "Remember what I told you the day I died, Onixa?" She says gently, stroking my cheek, and I cry harder. "Be strong. Dying is easy. Living is much harder. The other rogues need you. They will be there for you. They need you to be there for them. Things will fall apart without both you and your mate." My throat tightens so painfully I can't speak. "Live your life, Onixa." Grahams pleads. "Choose happiness. It's what your mate wants you to do. It's what Grey Dawn would have wanted. You'll be reunited with them when it's your time to go. Now is not that time." "I'm scared," I whisper. And I am. I'm so terrified to brave the world without Fineian by my side. To be truly alone. "I know," she says softly. "I know, baby." I sobb in her arms until she pulls away again. "It's time, Ona," she says gently. And I see a ball of light, the only light in the darkness. "You have to go back," she says, squeezing my hand one last time. "You'll make the world a better place. You'll save the next generation of rogues. Give them the peace you never got to experience. You'll learn to be happy, Nyx. But you have to choose to go back. Only you can make that decision." "I don't want to," I choke out. I just wanted to follow my mate into the dark. Never deal with the pain of living again. Graham smiles slightly. "You must. You're strong, Nyx. You will survive this. You will get your happy ending." The light gets brighter. "Willis. Willis. You tell Finian that I forgive him," I ask, my voice cracking. "That I'll see him again. That I'll love him always." My Graham kisses my cheek. "He knows, dear. He just wants you to be happy." Even without him, the light almost entirely takes over as if it knows that I'm getting closer to making a choice. There's always a choice. Lou had chosen to continue to live, to be strong, even after he lost his mate. Ronin and Gray, too. All of the men I had genuine friendships with and loved and admired had chosen life, even though they had every reason not to. I made my choice. "Goodbye, Grahams," I whisper. "I love you." Her smile is almost as bright as the light. "I love you, Nyx. I'm so proud." And then the light takes over and there's no more darkness.

Chapter 66. When I wake up, I see stars. But I'm not outside. I'm in the room that I used to share with my husband. Grief and pain hit me like a tidal wave, and I instantly regretted my decision to choose life. I have made the wrong choice. "Onixa," Ronan says in relief and I pull my eyes away from the stars to see him and Dean staring at me. They don't even know. "Fine," I try saying and immediately break down. Pain sobbs shaking my body. Dean sits on the bed and pulls me into his arms and I cry even harder. They don't know that their best friend is dead. It should have been me. "We know," Ronan says softly. "We know what happened." His words confuse me so much that my crying momentarily stops. "I— what? How?" "The blood alpha," Dean says, seeming surprised. "He let me look through his memories so we could see what happened." I didn't believe him, but his voice trails off. "Where? Where is Kalia?" I asked, hoping that they had broken the news to her so I didn't have to. I couldn't even say the words. Finineian is dead. "She found her mate," Ronan finally answers. "The beta of Blood Lake. We— I already told her." Calia and Alex. Weirdly, I could see it. They were both goofy, strong willed. They would be happy together. And I would be alone. "Astra and Willis?" I ask. Dean and Ronan looked to each other. "They were killed." I gasp. No, I didn't know them particularly well, but I didn't. Everything went wrong. "They—" Dean hesitates. "They were going out and killing Bloodlake Wolves. Son's memories confirmed it. Aster's gift allowed her to lure Bloodlake Wolves out, and Willis killed them." "Why?" I whisper. "Why would they do that?" "Aster was originally from Blood Lake. She was abused by a warrior there. And the alpha before Kynan didn't believe her when she told him she— she was young when the old alpha kicked her out. Kynan had no idea," Ronan says softly. "She wanted revenge. She was killing innocent wolves." It made me miss her less. "Did Fineian know?" I ask, unsure if I want to know the answer. Dean and Ronan shake their heads. "None of us did. We didn't know where they were going during the day. Didn't ask," Dean answers. I stare at the trees painted on the walls, the lump in my throat thick. "I have to bury him," I whisper, dreading seeing his body. Scared to see him again like that. No longer full of life, the kind twinkle in his eyes is permanently dead. Dean rubs my back. "We took care of it. We— We didn't want you to see him like that." I nod gratefully, tears streaming down my face. "Take me there." I look at my husband's freshly dug grave. Ronan had placed his rarest flowers over him. I asked them to leave me alone. I have no tears left. I am empty without my other half. I made the wrong choice. He had died trying to give me a better life, but there was no life without him. He abandoned me. I sit there for a while staring at his grave, replaying memories of him over and over in my head. "I love you always." Kalia sits next to me and wraps her arm around me. And we sit in silence, though I feel her body shake slightly as she cries over her brother. "I'm sorry," I choke out. "There are no words to express how sorry I am, how deeply my guilt and regret run." "Don't, Nyx," she says softly, wiping her tears. "It's not your fault, Finineian wouldn't want you to blame yourself. None of us do." "But it is my fault. My fault for not killing the blood Luna when Seline asked me to. If I did, we wouldn't be here right now." "I found my mate," Kalia says suddenly. And I know she's only trying to take my mind off of Finine, even for a brief moment. But thoughts of him would consume me forever. I force out a smile. "I don't mean it. I heard. Congratulations. Alex is a nice guy." Calia gets a dreamy look on her face. "A total hunk, right? He wants to take me back to Blood Lake with him. Could you imagine? Me, the beta female of a pack." She snorts like the idea is absurd. "I can stay," Kalia quickly says when she sees the look on my face. "Stay a while longer until—" "What?" This is what I want to ask. But don't no matter how much time passed, I would still feel this way. "No," I tell her. "You should be with your mate. Fine would have forced you to go." I almost smile at that. Fine had kidnapped me just to be with his mate. He would have wanted his sister to go with hers willingly. Calia looks relieved by my answer. I had a feeling that staying here would be too hard for her, a constant reminder of her deceased brother. "I'll come visit," she promises. "I'll come by all the time to make breakfast." "I think Dean would rather you not," I say drilly. But making fun of them is not half as funny as it was without Finny and slight chuckles and eye rolls. Calia laughs slightly. "Fine, no cooking, but I will come visit all of the time." I nod and Calia hugs me tightly before getting up. She pauses before leaving. "Ona," she says hesitantly. "I already lost my brother, my family. I don't want to lose you, too. Promise you'll be here when I come and visit." I swallow thickly. She could feel my emotions, feel my desire to be done with living already. "I promise," I say, and I'm not sure if I mean it. She squeezes my hand tightly before leaving. The sun begins to set, and I wonder if Fineian is watching it from wherever he is. He wouldn't miss a sunset. A few minutes later, I hear someone walking towards me. I look up and see the blood Luna. I look away just as quickly. "Thank you," she says, her voice softer than I've ever heard it. "For saving Kynan." "I don't want your gratitude," I say, feeling completely numb. Nothing would bring Fineian back. Arriio size. "I know." Part of me knows that the reason I saved Kynan was so that he could be happy with his mate and have the pups they so desperately wanted. Kynan, not as bad a guy as I thought. "Draen," I say suddenly, reminded of how desperately Kynan wanted me to remember the name. "What does that name mean?" Arriio doesn't seem surprised that I'm asking. And I wonder if Kynan told her that he told me to say it. Her demeanor gets nervous. "It's what we're going to name our first girl," she says, her eyes glazing over, imagining a future that I would never get. "Why did he tell me that name?" I ask, curious about why it would even matter if I told her. Arisio gets a panicked look in her eye before it goes away, and I wonder if I imagined it. She shrugs. "I would have known you were an ally to Kynan if you said the name. We were the only ones who knew it." That still doesn't explain why Kynan was so desperate to make sure Arriio didn't kill me. But I accept her explanation anyway, because I don't have it in me to argue with the person who has taken so much from me. She looks down at the grave, and I wonder if she knows that she's the reason he's down there. If she hadn't been terrorizing rogues, Fineian wouldn't have felt the need to do everything in his power to make his home safe. "I will kill you if you ever harm another rogue," I threatened Darkly. "I will drain the life from you and your entire pack. Even Kynan, I would stay alive solely to ensure that she doesn't." Arriio doesn't look outraged by this. I expect her to argue, but she looks sad. Sad and very tired indeed. She looks so much older than she is in that moment. I almost forget that she's younger than me. "I won't," she says. And for some reason, I believe her. Something in her eyes tells me that she means it. She takes a step back and I think she's about to leave when she quietly says, "If if you ever need somewhere to go, you'll have a home at Blood Lake." I dip my head slightly, but we both know I never will take her up on that. My home is here in the house Fineian built and died trying to protect. She leaves, but still my thoughts on my home remain. Perhaps this was always my purpose. Staying here to protect rogues, protect those who lost too much too early. I certainly have enough magic to conceal it, to defend it. and Arriio unintentionally planted a seed somewhere in my heart, a seed of purpose, reminding me of all the rogues that were still out there, needing a home, a family. Finine would have wanted me to continue his legacy, not let it fall apart after his death. "Hi, Onexa." A voice says quietly. I look up and see Lou. "Lou," I breathe. The first time I can breathe since Fineian died. He sits next to me and we look at the grave. He doesn't say anything. We both know what it feels like to lose our other half too soon. "When are you leaving?" I ask him. The gamma of Blood Lake could not stay here much longer. Lou shakes his head slightly. "I— I—"

Don't want to leave if it's all right with you, he says softly, his eyes troubled.

I frown. You want to stay here as a rogue?

Lou nods. I should have been a rogue the day my pack was destroyed. I understand him better than anyone else. Packs are like a toxic poison. Power and dominance taking precedence over peace and prosperity.

What do we do now? I ask, looking at my deceased husband's final resting place. There is no hate or anger in my heart. There is pain, yes, and there always will be. But there is still that seed of hope of wanting to make the world a better place that begs to be watered and nurtured.

The only thing we can do, he says softly. Lou holds his hand out and grows bright poppies over Finine's grave. We grow.

Epilog.

Ona. Where should I put the wood? Dean calls out sweating under the hot sun as he carries a huge log. I could have used my magic to help him, but this was way more entertaining. And for the record, Dean adds with a wink. I mean, the logwood, not my.

I roll my eyes. Yeah, I know what you meant, Dean. Put it with the others. I want this house built by next week, and we're behind on schedule.

Dean rolls his eyes and mutters something about me being a dictator, which makes Ronin smack him on the head. I look at the developing house proudly and grin. 10 years have gone by and since then we have found and provided shelter for so many rogues. The house Finine built was filled to the brim. So much so that we're building another one right next to it.

Finine. I think of him every day. See him in every rogue we save. Some days are more complex than others and I spend hours reading over the letters he used to leave for me. Most of them wrinkled from dried tears. There are days when I can't leave my bed, feeling his loss so intensely, it's like the day I lost him. The nights are even worse, and sometimes I wake up screaming, haunted by visions of my deceased mate. But he is always there. He holds me when I cry, grows poppies if the hugging isn't enough, which means our bedroom is often filled with them. And as time went by, the bedridden days and nightmare-filled nights got fewer and further in between. With every rogue we save, I feel a crack in my heart mend over.

A small hand tugs on my jeans. Mom, can Finnegan and I go play in the garden? Dileia asks, pouting slightly like I could ever tell her no. I ruffle her golden hair. Fine, but make sure that your brother doesn't step on any of them. You know, Uncle Ronin is protective over his garden. The truth is Ronin loved those two children as if they were his own. And the last time Finnegan trampled an entire patch of daisies, all Ronin did was laugh and chase him around the garden and be back for dinner.

I call out as she runs away, dragging her dark-haired brother along with her. Dileia and Finnegan, my children who have never known a day of pain, whom I hope will never have to see how truly dark the world outside our protected lands can become. My magic hides the land around us, constantly draining the life from plants that Lou regrows everyday. The sear from Blue Moon once advised me to choose growth, which I hadn't understood at the time, but now meant everything to me.

Speaking of Lou wraps his arm around my waist. The house is coming along nicely. No thanks to Dean's antics. He smiles, the corners of his eyes wrinkling. I sigh but relax in his touch. There's still so much to do. He kisses the top of my head. And it'll get done. We'll see to it. Where are the kids?

I giggle. Do you even have to ask? Maybe they'll tire themselves out enough before bed, L suggests hopefully. And we'll be able to go to bed early without story time.

Ah, yes. Story time. I tell them stories from my life, leaving out the gruesome details, but telling them the truth nonetheless. I tell them about a female alpha so brave, so fierce, so deadly on a battlefield. Wolves would pass down legends about her for centuries. And they do. I tell them about Aizio. I tell them about a rogue that dreamed of a better future. A better future where young pups wouldn't be scared to go into the woods and how he would have done anything to make it a reality. I tell them about Fineian. I tell them about an alpha that lost everything and everyone far too young. He had every reason to let his heart turn ugly and take it out on everyone else. He's the kindest person I know and it's why we got married and started a family. I tell them about their father. I tell them about Lou. I tell them about a rogue thrust into a world she didn't understand and how she had to grow up quickly to learn but never let the darkness take over. I tell them about me and so from my stories they learn to be brave, generous, resilient, strong. Above all, they learn to be kind. To never let their souls turn rotten no matter what adversity they face. There is always a choice to do good to be good. After all, compassion is the only thing that separates us from the beasts that lurk in the shadows of the.