you have to be what changes

As we're pushing towards the new year, I know many of us sort of have our intentions set. We understand at the very least that there are parts of us that need change, that we want to change, at least for our own betterment. And recently, I've been recognizing that many of the walls that we run into when it comes to our change only stem from us. Because our change is not marked by how we view circumstances, but how we view ourselves and how we conduct ourselves based off of what we view. All that to say, you have to be what changes. And it's always been us who has to change.

You know, they say nothing changes if nothing changes or if you keep using the same bricks, you keep building the same house. There's always an input value that must be changed and that input is always you. When is it not the energy that we give to a situation? When is it not the feelings we have about a situation? When is it not the thoughts that we have about any circumstance or situation in our life that truly governs it? Do we allow it to be governed by the way that it is or the way that we are?

And I think in addressing these questions, we have to understand that everything is always a result of the person looking. The observer always has an impact on the field. And I think in a real way, we have to learn to sort of be the observer. Be the observer enough to watch our own patterns in life and make real decisions. Not based off of solely just feeling or solely just thought, but everything that we are. But really giving ourselves a moment to occupy, a sensation to feel. Not necessarily quantifying or qualifying all of our thoughts based on [music] the words that we use. You know, learning to sort of be in the moment void of thought, I think, is is a is a a good way to get there.

You know, when we sort of open ourselves up to interpreting ourselves beyond thought, beyond words that we use, we recognize that there's so much more vastness to who we are than we are even able to articulate. And when we understand that the self is much bigger than whatever parts we have found or discovered currently, [music] we recognize that there's so much more left for us to explore and discover when it comes to ourselves. And we're doing ourselves a disservice if to not find the parts of ourselves that we could even love more.

I like to think of it like, you know, we're constantly building and expanding the puzzle that is us. And until we actually take the time to keep expanding the pieces, we won't see more of the picture. And I think that's why we think nothing changes when when we're not the one that changes because we haven't added any more foundation to our stability. We haven't cleared any more path for us to walk. We have to be the one that changes.

Not necessarily to say that we have to put overzealous effort into everything we do. I think that sometimes or at least in the modern day, we get it in our heads that we need to work and we value ourselves off our utility and how we appeal or or benefit others. And I don't mean that to say that we shouldn't work at all. I mean that to say that when it comes to our work, we tend to stress ourselves out. We tend to work outside of work in terms of the stress that we put on ourselves during and uh shortly after or maybe before. All I'm really saying is if we don't learn to value ourselves based off of anything other than the utility and the work that we put in, then we're not really working towards anything.

You know, I think if we're not really guaranting ourselves a space to occupy mentally, spiritually, physically, then all we're doing is using the space given to us by another. And I don't mean that to say that we're all like we're all under control, but to say at the very least, we have to learn to sort of appreciate our own contributions. Living life from our own standpoint, living life from our own point of view. I think that's really all there is to it.

When you sort of silence all the noise around you or rise above all the nonsense that's around us, um you recognize that you never really needed to give into the nonsense in the first place. And when I say nonsense, I really just mean any negativity or anything negative that doesn't really one benefit you or two is not honest enough to actually talk about your character. I think there's always an honesty aspect of self-development, self uh actualization. And I think that always comes with us just being present enough to recognize what's currently there and being present enough to allow it to sort of branch off and discover more and more.

One thing about the self or one thing about the mind or anything in regards to us is [snorts] once we become aware of one aspect of ourselves, one aspect of anything, we suddenly become more attuned to discover more and more aspects of what's close by. That's why I think it's always the most adjacent step that needs to be taken. The step that's within view, the step that you believe is there. And also recognizing that the first step reveals the second. When it comes to anything that we do, it's always successive action that brings us to whatever goal we have in mind. It's not one uh step towards our goal. It's not one huge leap to get to our our end goal. It's it's always the steps that you take along the path.

And I think in living in reference to the path or living your in reference to yourself or being present while you're on the path, it's also a beautiful uncovering too. Once you give yourself permission to sort of see all the beauty that's around you during your path, you learn that you should really appreciate each and every aspect that life has to offer you. You know, you recognize that this moment that you're in is never going to happen again. Never. So what's the point in not appreciating it for the space that it currently takes up rather than the space it doesn't?

I think we allow our gratitude to live in reference to each other. [music] We tend to be grateful for past circumstance in the present moment. And in that present moment when we're forgetting to be grateful for what's currently in our vicinity. And I don't mean that to say that we can't be grateful for what is already passed. But if we're going to be grateful for anything, it should be for how we are now in result of that past thing. And learning how to ground our gratitude in the present moment so we actually can continue to move forward and act upon that gratitude in a way that benefits us.

To say that we need to be the one who change or the thing that changes is recognizing that there is no such thing as external change in a real sense. There's always an internal aspect to the external world. And I think until we acknowledge that within ourselves, we won't really be able to branch into anything new. It's always about us discovering new potentials and possibilities for [music] ourselves and if not discovering them, embracing them. You have to recognize that what's stagnant is dead in a lot in a lot of ways. And our natural state has always been change. Even if we feel like we've been stagnant for a while, there are definitely things that have changed. Even if it's just in reference to this time that's passed.

And I think if we are going to live in a reference point because that's the way that our society is set up, that's the way we've been taught to think, then why not reference ourselves to the good aspects that are within our character? Why not focus on the good that we can actually produce within ourselves? And I don't mean that to say, you know, uh, every single thing in the world is peace and love. Everything in the world is as you view it. We all have different perspectives. We all are allowed to view things in different ways. I think that's the beauty of individualism. However, in recognizing that you have the potential and ability to think anything [music] that you want. I think it's just about making sure you're being present enough to choose the things that actually serve you.

And I don't mean that to say ignore everything that you've done wrong or immoral things or anything like that. I think all of these things too should be paid attention to. But I think that when it comes to ourselves and comes to us actually changing, it's always about the present intention that we have. And when that present intention is gone, typically the intention for everything is gone. And I think it's just about holding ourselves one accountable and taking our time with ourselves. Change takes time. It really does. And I hate to put our us on the scale of time [snorts] because time is is a madeup thing that we've used to to help things make sense. But in saying that change takes times, it's really to say that we have to be our own friend while we're walking our path. We need to be there for ourselves while we're on our own path and cheer for ourselves and pick ourselves up when we fall. If we never give ourselves a chance to actually walk the path with support, then we're never ever going to feel supported by what's outside of us.

It's about recognizing that you are going to be with you 100% of the time. And any circumstance that you're involved in, you're involved in. As long as you have yourself, you have somebody. And in being able to give yourself even a tiniest fraction of support, grace, gratitude, forgiveness, love, we're able to bridge new gaps into things that we have yet to do.

I think it's important to recognize too that there are so many unknown aspects to the world that we live in. Everything's an unknown. We don't know what's going to happen in the next second. And I think that's a beautiful aspect, too. And I think in embracing this unknown, we still get to embrace our unknownness in a way and recognize that we can make our own contributions to the life that we live in ways that have not been done before.

Sometimes I think we or at least this is a thought that I had the other day is the reason that things feel so stagnant and cyclic is because I've been acting the same way or I've been conducting myself doing the same things and I can be the change to that. I don't have to do the same thing every single day. I don't. And in giving yourself at least that sort of freedom and peace of mind, you recognize that you don't have to do anything in reference to the familiarity of it.

I think that most great discoveries don't happen in comfort. They happen in discomfort. They happen in the unknown. They happen in people's ability to address the possibility of them not knowing what not knowing. I guess anything. I was about to say, well, we currently know, but that doesn't make sense. It's just about understanding that you don't know everything. He who knows anything knows that he knows nothing at all. There's always so much more to get out there and know. And I think it's not necessarily just about the acquisition of knowing. It's about the integration of wisdom. It's about us allowing our knowledge to sort of be used as a guidepost at times for what we do and making sure that we're willing to [music] change uh our opinions on certain things and be open at least to you know real discussion, real open-mindedness, real connection.

I think sometimes we get so opinionated because a lot of people identify with their thoughts. We identify so much with our thoughts that if somebody talks about a thought that we had that's incorrect, we take damage, which doesn't make any sense because thoughts can be thought anytime. It's about what we allow our values to be placed in. We allow ourselves to sort of be placed in. And I think if we're going to limit ourselves to any idea, it should be our own at the very least. At the very most, you know, when you are able to grant yourself love, you can sort of grant yourself anything. And when I say that, I really just mean when you can grant yourself positivity. When positivity can be derived from your own character and derived from your own outlook on the world around you, then you don't need everything to line up in a certain way cuz you're already in line with everything that is. And in recognizing that things don't always need to look a certain way, you can grant yourself more comfort in the moment.

Confidence is uncomfortable. And it's not uncomfortable because uh so many bad things happen. It is uncomfortable because it's living in the unknown. It's recognizing that you can only do what you can and being present enough to do it and do your best at it cuz that's all you can do. And what else is there to think about truly, you know, we we sort of limit ourselves in reference to things that we have yet to do, but more so things that we have yet to try to do. And I think if anything, we should learn how to give ourselves one, grace for the things that we have yet to achieve and gratitude for everything that we've already became. Cuz what you are now is always enough for now.

I think we need to sort of get into more of a being aspect of life. Learning how to be rather than just think about being. Learning how to become the change rather than thinking about change. I think a lot of us get captured in our thoughts about change cuz we're like, "Ooh, I want to do this. This is I'm going to start this routine. I'm going to do this. I'm going to do this." And when it gets to the actual point where we want to do that, it sort of leaves us because that motivation wasn't grounded in being. It was grounded in thought. And thoughts pass until we allow our changes to take time. Until we allow it to be reintroduced to ourselves. Not for the purpose of just coercion or convincing, but for the purpose of showing ourselves that there are multiple ways of being us and there are versions of us that accommodate our needs and interests in a much better way. So, it's about opening ourselves up to more possibilities within ourselves and understanding that there are many different ways that life can be experienced if you open yourself up to the experience that is life.

Uh, all that to say, thank you very much for watching. If you made it this far, thank you. Uh, hard cover books, there was a delay in the shipment. Paperback is still available though. Y'all can y'all can uh hop on the wave in that if you don't know what I'm talking about. I wrote a book like a month ago and I released it. Um, check it out if you're new. If you're not new, nice to see you again.