Transcription
Why is it that most people don't pursue their dreams or don't do better than what they're doing if they're capable of doing it? I think that many of us don't go the next step because we don't know what to do yet. And I say that the reason that we don't even explore the possibility of what to do is because subconsciously we don't believe that it can happen for us, and we don't believe that we deserve it.
So here's what I'm suggesting: How much time do you spend working on you? How much time do you spend every day working on your dream? In the last 90 days, how many books have you read? In the last year, what new skill or knowledge have you acquired? What kind of investment have you made in you?
So I'm saying that as you begin to look at where you want to go, if you want to make it today, and things are changing so fast, you have to literally run to stand still. I'm saying that you've got to make some conscious effort to begin to work to develop you.
Here's something else: Most people are not living their dreams because of fear. Ladies and gentlemen, I was in Columbus, Ohio, yesterday speaking for a particular Ohio Department. Young lady named Karen, who greeted me, who organized the event, very talented, very skillful. And she was talking about she wanted to become involved in the consulting business. I say, "Why aren't you doing it?" I said, "You have the abilities." I said, "You're not here because they like you, you're here because you're doing the job, you're making things happen." And she came up with all kind of ideas, but finally she said, "I guess I I can't see myself doing it. I guess I'm afraid."
Fear, limited vision, and lack of self-esteem is what keep most people doing things they don't want to do. I was flew from Columbus, Ohio, to Denver, Colorado, to a major communications company. And the person that picked me up at the airport told me about the fact that the company is planning on having a major downsizing. And they offered some of the employees there an early retirement, and some of them would earn as much as $300,000. And they said, "This is the last time that you can take this offer. If you don't do it when we have the downsizing, you might be among those who will lose their jobs, and all you will get is your severance pay." And only 50% of the people who were eligible to take the $300,000 took it. The others were afraid to take a chance on themselves. The others couldn't see themselves beyond that company. They couldn't see life after that company. The same reason that people stay in relationships where they're abused or they're unhappy or it's unfulfilling. They can't see themselves beyond that relationship. They can't see themselves enjoying life without that person. They think that this is all that they can do. The same reason that people get stuck at a certain level in life. They can't see things being better for them, and they think that this is it, and this is all they deserve. This is all they've ever seen. It's been passed on to them, and they think that this is it for them. Oh no.
I was looking what Dr. Blandon, S.M.Y. Blandon, who is a colleague of Dr. Norman Vincent Peele, what he said about fear. He said, "Fear is the most subtle and destructive of all human diseases." Ladies and gentlemen, fear kills dreams. Fear kills hope. Fear put people in the hospital. Fear can age you. Fear, ladies and gentlemen, can hold you back from doing something that you know within yourself that you're capable of doing, but it will paralyze you. And it seems like you're in a hypnotic spell.
And I ask you a question: What is the benefit? What's the benefit of allowing fear to hold you back? What's the benefit of giving up on yourself, of not stepping out on life and taking life on? What is the benefit for you? What's the plus in that? It's one of the things I had to ask myself. So I didn't want to make any mistakes. I wanted everybody to like me. I wanted to be perfect the first time I did something. It's not going to happen. You're going to make some mistakes. You're going to hurt some folks' feelings. You're going to create some enemies. Whenever you decide that you want to begin to take life on, you've got to ask yourself, "How long am I going to allow this to hold me back?"
I like what Zig Ziggler says. He said, "Fear is false evidence appearing real." That is an illusion that we create in our mind. It is a state of mind that can be changed. So let's look at how we can begin to take some steps to restructure that fear, to begin to expand our visions of ourselves, to begin to increase our self-esteem. Webster said that self-esteem means confidence and satisfaction in oneself. Look at your life right now. Whatever you've done up to this point in time, your life is working. Whatever you have produced, it came out of you as a result of the kind of person that you have become. It's a result of your choices. It's a result of your consciousness. Now you have to ask yourself, "Are you satisfied with what you have produced? Is this what you want? Would you like for things to be better than this? Do you believe that you deserve better than this? Are you content? This is it. You don't have to do anything else." That you already resigned yourself in life and say, "Well, I'm happy." Are you allowing yourself to get off the hook like that? Or do you believe, somewhere in the back of your mind or in your heart, that there's some other great work for you to do? There's something else that life has for you, and that's why you're here.
How do we handle this fear factor? How do we increase our self-esteem? You have to begin to fortify yourself. How do we do that? I believe that you have to begin to consciously monitor your inner conversation and start talking to yourself. Start building yourself up. Sometimes the only good things you will hear about you are the things that you say to you. So I'm saying, learn to be your own booster. Start building yourself up. Start encouraging yourself. Start saying, "I can do this. I can make this happen." When I started thinking about becoming a speaker, I said, "Yes, I can do this. I can make this happen." When I started trying to convince myself I can be a businessman, after flopping and failing and losing thousands of dollars and feeling stupid and dumb and having people take advantage of me because of what I didn't know, I had to talk to myself. Because people were saying to me that I was dumb. And somewhere in the back of my mind, I was saying, "You're right. Look at what I've done." I had to say, "No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Les, hey, hey, come on, man. Get yourself together. You can handle this. You just haven't figured it out yet. It's all right. This is your training period. This is the tuition you have to pay for what you don't know. You can do this. Other people have done it. It doesn't take an Einstein. Get you some people that can teach you some stuff that you don't know. Get you some people that have done it successfully and learn from them. Take some seminars, workshops, read some books on how to manage a business. Change the way you see yourself and begin to tend to the personal details. Understand that nobody's going to take care of your business better than you."
And when I started changing that kind of mindset of beating myself up because of my mistakes and started looking at the possibility of my doing better, of my making the adjustment that would enable me to do what I want to do successfully, things began to change. And I'm saying, stop beating up on yourself. You do, do it. I know you do it. I've done it. It's a natural inclination for us to put ourselves down. See, we are born negative. I think in a negative consciousness because we live in a negative world. See, you don't have to teach children to lie. They'll lie automatically. "Did you wet in your pants?" "No, I did not." Well, what is that? "I don't know." You don't have to encourage kids to misbehave. They will do it by themselves. You don't have to encourage them to do the wrong thing. They would do it automatically. You have to correct their behavior. So I'm saying that we have to work through the challenges of life in learning how to begin to work to fortify ourselves. Begin to guard your mind against negative programming, like turn off the television. Don't watch the news. I think that that that more people have a sense of hopelessness and anxiety about life. If you look at the news, you cannot not feel good looking at the news. You'll be scared to death. You're scared to go to sleep. I mean, it turns your power down. You've got to be conscious of that. Don't pick up the newspaper and read it. No, no. Just try this. Just experiment with yourself. Now, if your job depends upon you knowing certain things, let somebody tell you just about those things. But stop filtering the stuff you allow to come into your mind. You know that song you used to ask say, "Don't let nobody bring you no bad news." I tell my staff, "Look here, don't tell me any bad news while I'm on the road. Let me handle it tomorrow. I don't like anybody to tell me any bad news at night before I go to sleep. I can't do anything about it anyhow. Why let me go to sleep with that on my consciousness?" No, no. And my my staff, they know that. Said, "Let it wait till tomorrow." And I have a period of time. "Tell me bad news between 10:00 and 12:00 noon." After I prayed and meditated and read my books, I'm fortified. I'm ready to handle it. I deal with them, and I'm out of there, and I'm going on to something else. So you've got to the kinds of things that you put in your mind. See, if you don't program your mind, your mind will be programmed. Because human beings are goal-oriented. That's why we die of broken hearts early. That's why we're running through life to early graves. We're going through life, ladies and gentlemen, and I think that Henry David Thoreau said that "most men live in quiet desperation." Most of us go through life running scared.
Larry DeAng, who I think is going to be one of the greatest motivational speakers around today, told me a story, a true story of a friend of his. That every day when he came home from school, when he would get to a certain block in his neighborhood, there was a neighborhood dog that would chase him. And that dog would start after him barking. Boy, he would run. Just running from that dog. Every day, every day. Finally, he just got tired of that dog chasing him every day. He said, "This dog come around here today, I'm going to take a brick or stuff and bust him in the head." So he was walking home that day, minding his own business. Sure enough, same area, there was that dog. The dog started barking. He started running. He saw a brick and he stopped and picked up the brick and turned around. And the dog got close to him, he realized the dog didn't have any teeth. He said, "He put the brick down. He said, 'Get on out my way.'" And ladies and gentlemen, all our lives, many of us go through life running from things that ain't got no teeth to do us any harm. Haven't you been afraid to do something and then after you did it, you say, "Whoa, if I'd known it was this easy, I would have done it before"? Haven't you ever had that experience? Raise your hand. Absolutely. So we had created this in our minds, false evidence appearing real. We made it real in our minds. That's why Churchill said, "There's nothing to fear but fear itself." That's the destructive monster.
So turn off things that can contribute to your fear. Turn a deaf ear to people that all all they can do is talk about how negative things are, because they have brought into the consciousness of the world. Start attending workshops, seminars, listening to tapes on a daily basis to begin to recondition your mind, to retrain your thinking. Faith comes by what? Hearing and hearing and hearing. Listen to things that can empower you, that can enable you to create a new reality for yourself and a new life for yourself. You might appear to be strange around most people you know. Most people think you're strange if you're happy today. "How you doing?" "I said, 'Better than good.'" "Whoa, what's wrong with him?" Just go around smiling and watch people look at you. "Is this a weird guy over here?" Because most people don't smile. Watch them look at their faces in the morning. "Here we go. Another Monday morning. How you doing?" "Haven't had my coffee yet. Don't ask me." See, these people have not found their purpose in life. That's why they're grumpy. That's why they're miserable. That's why they're so negative. They're hurting, and they want to hurt other people.
So start practicing using programs for your mind. Seminars, books, workshops. Keep a journal. Record your thoughts. What's happening with you every day? When you get up, have a journal near you. I use a Jack Canfield journal so that I can write down my ideas. I keep it by my bed so I can write down my thoughts. See, ladies and gentlemen, we get three to four thoughts a year that if we would act on those thoughts, they could change our life. Don't say, "Well, I'll remember that." No, write that thought down. I got a thought today. I wrote down, "A friend of mine is in the hospital. His morale is low. They're talking about amputating his foot. He's got to feel very bad." So I said, "You know, I'm going to I'm not only am I going to see him, but I can't be there with him all the time. I said, 'I'm going to create a tape for him that that he can listen to that will heighten his level of morale.'" We told him the other night, "Don't go to surgery. You are depressed. Your energy level is down." No, no. "Tell him not now. Don't do it now." In fact, most doctors who have any sense of awareness don't perform surgery on patients that are in a state of fear, that don't think they will make it. They wait till they're in a different state of mind. So I said, "What about making tapes for people that are facing physical challenges?" I said, "That's a good idea." All right. See, there are ideas that can come to you out of things that appear to be negative.
I have a friend out of Chicago. Just met him. He was 23 years old. And this guy, he went financially bankrupt two years ago, ruined his credit. Guess what he decided to do? He found a blessing in it. He wanted to restore his credit. It was very challenging, very difficult. And he realized that a lot of other people during these particular times are ruining their credit. So now he started a credit repair business. Last year, he earned over $100,000 helping people to restore their credit. I met a young lady who attends this church that she was at her father's funeral. And and she was putting flowers on her father's grave. And she looked around and saw the other grave sites. They did not look well-groomed, and they were not attended to on a regular basis. She started a grave site maintenance business out of that tragedy. Something positive has come out of it. And now she's earning more money doing that than on her present job. What idea are you sitting on? Write your ideas down. And then what idea are you sitting on? Write your ideas down. And then once you get that idea, take the leap. Hello. Take the leap. See, a lot of people get the ideas and just walk around with them. Have you ever had an idea and all of a sudden you looked around and somebody had that idea and gone with it? Think you're going to be going with my hospital idea? Forget that, buddy. We will be out there together. Jack, take the leap. See, it's out here in the universe. If you don't take the plunge, I guarantee you somebody else will take the plunge. Go into action. And ladies and gentlemen, you will be surprised at how things will come together. You'll be surprised.
Now, you're going to have some difficult challenges. I can tell you that now. Be aware of that. Things are not going to work out exactly right for a time. They will sometimes. And that's when life is just playing a game with you. Want you to feel good and relax. And then after a while, say, "Okay, the honeymoon's over now." And then life will come over there and slap you side the head. Say, "What you doing out here?" "Well, it's my dream." "Life is that right? Come over here a minute. Oh, you went to the seminar, huh? Come here. I can tell you that." But ladies and gentlemen, go into action with your dream. And don't avoid where the fights are. Get in the midst of the fight and get some hickeys on your head. Get knocked down so you can learn how to fight, so you can hold your position. See, most people don't get out in the arena of life because they don't want to fight. Most people don't get out there because they don't want to get knocked down. They don't want to be dropped to their knees. But see, you're going to be dropped whether you're on the field or whether or not you're sitting on the sidelines. You're going to be dropped. So at least get dropped for something. Don't get knocked down while you're sitting down. See, that's how most people are spectators in life. You don't want to be a spectator. You want to get out in the field where the action is. And you will be amazed. After the struggle, there will be a calm period, and things will begin to click for you. Come out here with what you got. You don't have enough money? Don't worry about it. You got the dream? You got the idea? You don't have enough resources? Don't worry about it. You need some help? Don't worry about it. You get out here in the arena. Someone will look at you and become inspired and say, "Hey, can I help you?" But if you're sitting up on the bleachers, nobody's going to ask you anything. You've got to get into the flow of action.
Francis Heth called me from Chicago. She had been sitting on an idea of a show that she wanted to produce for 10 years called "Mind Body Connection." So someone saw me speaking in Chicago at a sorority convention and said, "I saw a guy that perhaps can host this show for you who has energy and charisma." She called me. She was so fired up. I said, "Listen, on the day that you want to do that, I'm speaking in Chicago. I can do it for you." And I said, "By the way, I met somebody two weeks ago in Baltimore who has an idea of the same kind of show, and she's doing it on radio. Why don't you call her?" And then she called me back. "Who else would you suggest?" I say, "Well, I know Deepak Chopra. He wrote the book called 'Quantum Healing,' and Bernie Siegel." "Could you get his number?" "I tell you what, I have a friend named Jack Canfield at the Church of the Day. He knows how to get in touch with him. Call him, and he will give you the number so you can get in touch with Bernie Siegel." That lady started calling all around. Did not have the resources, but she had this idea and dream. And she said the other night when she came before the audience that had gathered in the studio, she said, "I feel like I've been pregnant for 10 years, and tonight you're going to witness a beautiful delivery." And it was. She said, "I couldn't believe, Les, how things began to happen, how it all began to come together." When you want something out of life, you've got to be willing to go into action. Don't wait around for things to be just right. Don't wait for things to be perfect. Don't wait for the ideal situation. It will never be ideal. There will always be a reason. "Well, as soon as the children grow up. As soon as I pay my bills. As soon as I get my divorce." All kind. "As soon as I get enough money together." Do what you can, where you are, with what you have.
And never be satisfied. A lot of people never take a chance in life. They don't want to take any chances. They want the situation to be ideal. See, that's not walking by faith. That's walking by sight. I was born in a poor section of Miami, Florida, called Liberty City. I was born in an abandoned building on a floor with a twin brother. And when we were 6 weeks of age, we were adopted. And when I was in the fifth grade, I was identified as EMR, labeled educable mentally, put back from the fifth grade to the fourth grade. And I failed again when I was in the eighth grade. I don't have any college education. But because of my mother, and I feel like Abraham Lincoln, who said, "All that I am and all that I ever hope to be, I owe to my mother." I saw a sign once that said that "God took me from my biological mother's womb and placed me in the heart of my adopted mother." So my first major goal was to buy my mother a home, to take care of my mother. And I did that. Took care of her until she passed at 88. But I'll never forget when I met Mr. Washington. I was in a class waiting on another student. And he came in. And he said, "Young man, go to the board and work this problem out for us." I said, "Oh, sir, I can't do that." He said, "Why?" I said, "I'm not one of your students." He said, "Look at me." I said, "Yes, sir. Go to the board and work the problem out anyhow." I said, "Sir, I I can't do what you're asking me to do." He said, "Why, sir?" "Because I'm I'm educable mentally, sir." And as the students erupted in laughter, he came from behind his desk. He looked at me and he said, "Don't you ever say that again. Someone's a pin of you does not have to become your reality." And that was a turning point in my life. On one hand, I was humiliated. But on the other hand, I was liberated. Because he looked at me with the eyes of Gerda, who said, "Look at a man the way that he is, he only becomes worse. But look at him as if he were what he could be, then he becomes what he should be." I've found that most people fail in life not because they aim too high and miss. Most people fail in life because they aim too low and hit. And many don't aim at all. So raise the bar yourself. And don't ask how you're doing, how you're going to do it.
I'll never forget when I decided that I wanted to become a motivational speaker. I saw the late Dr. Norman Vincent Peele. And my heart said, "I can do that." But my mind asked the question, "How?" And for over 14 years, for 14 years, I would go see Zig Ziggler and Dr. Norman Vincent Peele and Jim Rohn and different speakers. And I would be in the audience. And my heart would pounce and say, "You can do that. You can do that." Lesson then, when I would leave, I would be going to the parking lot, and my mind said, "How you going to do it?" And I spent so many years trying to figure out how. I wasted 14 years. How many of you ever procrastinated? Raise your hands, please. Yeah. See, so as you begin to think about your goals, the most important thing is, and write this down, commit yourself. See, once you commit yourself, the "how" will come. The way will come. Once you commit yourself, you will then figure it out. And if you're going in the wrong direction, all you have to do is turn around and go in the other direction. You will figure it out. You want to begin to just challenge yourself. You want to stretch yourself because you really don't know what you can't do.
What you think about the goals that you want to achieve? And I really want to challenge you to make up your mind that you're going to make that happen for yourself. And I hope that it's some goal that that really resonates with who you are. When I was a little boy, my goal was to to just buy groceries for our family. My mother worked on Miami Beach, she was a domestic worker. And my goal was to to really be able to go to the grocery store and purchase groceries ourselves. The families knew that my mother had adopted seven children. And so they said, "Maybe whatever food is left over after we eat, you can take that home to the children." They were very kind, very, very considerate people. The mother, my mother, who when she worked on Miami Beach, the people were very kind. I was appreciative of their generosity. But as a little boy, I said, "Mama, one day when I become a big boy, I'm going to be able to provide groceries for us." My goal as a little boy was to buy clothes for my brothers and sisters. We wore the hand-me-down clothes of the children that Mama babysat for when she went over in Miami Beach. And if the clothes were too small, she would let them out. And if they were too large, Mama could sew and take them up. And I'll never forget David Sedki. His father was very wealthy. Mama worked for him. But David was my buddy. So his father gave him two gifts for his birthday. Gave him a brand new boat, but he also gave him some motivational tapes. Pearl Nightingale, I'll never forget. So he said, "David, man, let me tell you something. When I die, you're going to get everything. I want you to listen to these tapes." And when his father left the room, David threw those tapes in the wastebasket. I said, "David, can I have those tapes?" He said, "Yes." I said, "Man, your father said if you listen to these, you can get more and do more than what he's done." He said, "Hey, look, I don't get everything anyhow. Go ahead, take them." Write this down: It's not what you leave for your children, it's what you leave in them. You have something special. You have greatness within you. And the only reason you are here, you are my assignment. You can feel me. Some of you feel me right here in your heart of hearts. And my goal in is to get past your mind and enter your heart. So it's necessary that you have the mindset that "I can do this." You've got to begin to believe and to fortify that belief and feed that belief by listening to tapes, going to seminars and workshops, by challenging yourself, by stretching yourself. It was Osbourn who said, "Unless you attempt to do something beyond that which you've already mastered, you will never grow." And as you begin to challenge yourself, you'll discover some things about yourself that you don't know right now.
The other thing is, begin to look at yourself. Look at your dreams. And begin, begin to experiment and stepping into your greatness. One of the things that is very important, whatever goals and dreams that you have, make your move before you're ready. Pritchard, who's a great, great motivator and trainer, he said, "Make your move before you're ready." We're instructed in life to walk by faith and not by sight. See, you want to really begin to stretch yourself. You want to become a risk-taker. You want to raise the bar on yourself. Most people won't do that. There. Most people engage in low-life living, low-risk living. Viscot said, "If you're not willing to risk, you cannot grow. And if you cannot grow, you cannot become your best. And if you cannot become your best, you can't be happy. And if you can't be happy, then what else is there?" I like what Helen Keller said: "Life is short and unpredictable. Eat the dessert first." And so you want to begin to take some chances. You want to begin to challenge yourself and make it okay to fail and learn from your failures. Don't allow fear of failure and the the the allure, the attractiveness of playing it safe in life to draw you in. You can't get out of life alive. You got to die to leave here.
The other thing is, you look at yourself and look at your dreams. Detoxify your life. Write that down. See, I think that most people never achieve their true goals in life because they're surrounded with too many toxic, negative, energy-draining people. You've got to look at the people in your life and ask yourself the question, "What is this relationship doing to me? How is it impacting my life? Am I a better person?" Sydney Porter wrote a book called "The Measure of a Man." In there, he said, "When you go for a walk with someone, something happens unconsciously. It's not spoken. Either you adjust to their pace, or they adjust to your pace." Whose pace have you adjusted to? See, you want to surround yourself. My my daughter, Ona Brown, who's a speaker and coach, she says, "Call forth your team, but make sure these are people that you can learn from." It's possible you can live your dream. It's necessary that you have a mindset that "I'm going to do this." But you've got to take ownership. You've got to decide, "Hey, I'm going to do this." You're going to you've got to take responsibility for your life. George Bernard Shaw said, "The people that make it in this life, they look around for the circumstances that they want. And if they can't find them, they create them." You've got to decide it's me. You've got to say, and say this with conviction, "I expect to win."
I think it's important that we say that. You know, if you ask most people, "Do you want to become successful?" They will say yes. Took my oldest son for a walk, my namesake, you know, we always expect our children. Him to do far more than what we do. Said, "Calvin, he wants his own identity. He's Leslie Calvin Brown Jr." I stopped him. Looked him in the eyes. I said, "Do you want to be successful, son?" He said, "Yes." "Our dad." "Very good. Let's walk, son. Walk further." Stopped him again. I said, "Calvin, look me in the eye, son." "Yes, sir, Dad." "Do you expect to be successful, son?" And he stood there, and he looked at me, and his eyes got glassy, and he said, "Let's walk." And the reason that he said, "Let's walk," because my son is very bright. Of all my children, he's perhaps the smartest one. But Calvin, now over 30, Calvin, now a single parent of two daughters, good father. Calvin, now at this stage of his life, he's behind on his dreams. Lot of talent, lot of abilities, very conservative, one of those people, great mind, but just he just hasn't developed that. You know, things that we want our kids to have. That I want it. Calvin, Calvin, you got to kick it up a notch, son. You never thought you'd be in your 30s. You got to kick it up a notch. You got to increase your energy in order to live your dreams. You can't be casual about your dreams. Bill Bailey said, "If you're casual about your dream, you end up a casualty." Shake someone's hand on your right and left and say, "Kick it up a notch." Yes, yes. You got to kick it up a notch.
What is it you bring? And whatever you bring, you've got to kick it up a notch. What is your signature? As you look at where you want to go and what it is you want to do, as you look at your product or your services, repeat out to me, please: "Provide more service than you get paid for." Yeah. See, that becomes your signature. When you look at your goals and look at where you want to go, at your products, at your services, at your industry, you want to set some high standards for yourself. I like what Henry David Thoreau said: "Do not go where the path may lead, but go where there is no path and leave a trail." How is it that your industry will be done differently five years from now, 10 years from now? What is your reputation in your industry? When you come into a room and you leave, what's the scuttlebutt about you? Do people say, "Hey, that's a go-to person. That's a person if you ask them to do that job, you're talking about the job being done. It will be done extremely well." Are you known for that person that that stand out with what you do? That stand out with your quality of service, with your standards? Always looking for ways to better your best. Are you one of those people that believe, "Well, if it ain't broke, don't fix it"? Japanese believe, "If it ain't perfect, keep working on it." Are you willing to keep working on it? Are you willing to realize that you have not done your best stuff yet? That you can better your best? You've got to take responsibility for that.
And now let's go to the next level. Not only is it possible that you can live your dream, is it necessary that you call forth your team and surround yourself with people that you can learn from and grow from? That you must work on yourself and monitor yourself and train yourself? That you've got to begin to take total responsibility for the outcomes that you want to produce in your life? But let us say together with power and conviction: It's hard, ladies and gentlemen. Living a dream, changing your life, it's hard. It's hard when you lose all your money. When you you've given it the best that you have. When you have some major setback. It's hard. When a doctor looked at me and said the three horrible words no one wants to hear: "You have cancer." It was hard to mobilize my mind and spirit to listen to tapes and music and read scripture and be around other people and seeking out other prostate cancer conquerors to believe that I could do this. It was hard. Never forget my son said, "Daddy, are you going to die?" "Why are you asking me that? You're not going out much. You're not the bubbly personality that I know you to be. You're not talking much. You're spending a lot of time in the room by yourself. Dad, are you going to surrender? Are you giving up? Are you going to let that doctor's opinion become your reality?" "Will my daddy see me graduate?" "Yes, yes, son. Yes, yes. I'm going to fight. No, no. I don't think it's my time yet. I'm going to see you graduate. But more than that, I've got some other things that I'm going to do with my life." And I thank you for asking me that. Um, but I must tell you that I'm scared. I'm scared. And um, I've never been in this situation before. It's it's been easy for me to talk to people and encourage people when when they've had challenges in their lives. Um, but it's me. And I don't feel less than a man and let and and admitting this to you. Yes, I'm scared. And I need some help. Repeat after me, please: "Ask for help, not because you're weak, but because you want to remain strong." And ask for help, and don't stop until you get it. Yes.
See, see, life is hard. And there are some moments in life when you're going to need some help. You're going to need somebody to speak to you. You're going to need somebody to say something to you. I have a friend of mine, Willie Jolly, is a motivational speaker. He said, "A setback is a setup for a comeback." I had to listen to Willie's tapes. I have another friend, Kevin Brace, who's a speaker. He said, "Les, come on, man. You can do this. You can make this happen. You can hit a home run. It's a done deal. You're a Les Brown. That cancer's got to get out of your body." I said, "Talk to me, Kevin. Talk to me. That's what I need to hear." I needed to hear those words. I don't care who you are. Many people won't allow themselves to ask for help because of pride. Pride cometh before fall. Because of ego. Ego means edging God out. No. Ask for help, not because you're weak, but because you want to remain strong. And ask for help, and don't stop until you get it. I'm here because a lot of people helped me. I'm here because a lot of people believed in me at a time when I was struggling to believe in myself.
The other thing is, let us say together: It's worth it. It's worth it. Yeah. See, I think in, write this down, you got to find five reasons that will make it worth it for you. Five reasons. What will make it worth it for you? Mine was, I want to take care of my mother. Mine was, I want to do something with my life. What will make it worth it for you? Mine is, I want to leave a legacy. Was to believe that I can do what I'm now doing. No one could have convinced me, just given my circumstances. I earn millions of dollars every year. No one could have convinced me. If both my parents came up here right now, I would not know either one. No one could have convinced me. Being labeled educable mentally, born in an abandoned building on a floor in Liberty City, poor section of Miami, Florida, failing twice in school, no college training, never worked for a major corporation. I did not know how I can do what I'm doing right now. Never forget Mike Williams, my mentor. One, I think a lot of people fail in life because of the fact that they need some mentoring. They need some coaching. When you begin to understand and acknowledge your fear, and you go forth anyhow, you go forth in a spirit and a knowing that there's a way that you can begin to handle this. There's a way out here somewhere. There's a solution. What it is that you're seeking, that you have the capacity to whatever comes up to handle it, to face it. And rather than feeling powerless, you begin to feel powerful.
See, when all of the major downsizings that are taking place around this country, there are a lot of people who are biting their fingers in fear that they might lose their jobs. But there are few people who have decided within themselves, "I'm going to make it." Some people aren't waiting to be cut. Some people are moving on their own because they feel within themselves, "I've got what it takes to make it." They're not afraid about tomorrow because of how they see themselves, because of what they feel that they deserve, because of what they feel that they can create for themselves. Because these people have decided, as they look at the future, as they look at themselves, there's a way. Where there's a will, there's a way for me to begin to create a way out of no way. And when you have that kind of consciousness, when you have that kind of spirit, nothing can stop you. Nothing.
What would your life be like as you look toward the future if you decided, "I'm not going to allow my fears to stop me"? What would your life be like? What would your future be like if you decided to want that which you desire so strongly that it prepares you past your fears? That you experience the fear as the one book says, "Feel the fear and do it anyway"? What would your life be like? And I'm saying to you that all of us who have been in tuned by fear have the capacity to resurrect ourselves. Is it easy? No, it's not easy. Can I do it? Yes. What's one of the ways to get started? Some of us need somebody to hold our hands. Sometimes we need somebody to help us out. Be willing to say, "I don't know." Be willing to reach out. Be willing to get some assistance to take you to the next level. What great athlete? You never expect boxers to make profound statements. I think it was Joe Frazier said this one: "All of us are like the blind man at some point in our lives, standing on the corner waiting for somebody to lead us across." See, all of us at some point in our lives need some help. Need someone to reach out to us, to throw out the lifeline, to help us go across some treacherous waters that we couldn't navigate by ourselves. None of us do it by ourselves. All of us at some point of our lives, we need that kind of help. We need that kind of assistance because we grow from the people we have in our lives that can enrich our lives personally, professionally, spiritually, and all the dimensions of our lives. We don't grow in a vacuum.
So as you look at yourself, whatever fears you have that maybe you need some help and strengthening yourself in that area, as you assess your strengths and your weaknesses, as you begin to improve yourself and your passions and your dreams and your goals and the things that you want, if you decide to experience all of your true potential, as you decide to manifest all of your greatness, as you decide, "Wait a minute, what else is available to me out here?" If I decided to experience the fear of rejection, the fear of no, the fear of failure, the fear of standing by myself, what else is available to me that will bring some extra meaning and value? The fear of people not liking me. You know how many people do things they don't want to do because they want everybody to like them? Everybody's not going to like you. Excuse me. Special announcement. Everybody's not going to like you. No. That's it's just not that kind of world. What? But you know, there are a lot of people who won't take positions on issues, who won't take a stand for things they believe in, who won't speak up for themselves because they don't want to make anybody mad. Oh, it was Bill Cosby. He said, "I don't know what the secret of success is. He said, but here's what I know what the secret of failure is. He said, trying to please everybody."
I guarantee you that as you begin to give more of yourself in your work, give more of yourself in your marriage, give more of yourself in your relationships with your families and friends, give more of yourself to your talent, to your vocation, to your job or your business, as you begin to set high standards for giving that which you have been given to share in the universe, I guarantee you that life takes on a whole new dimension. That you'll be happier. You have a greatest sense of happiness and fulfillment in life. Now, that doesn't mean you're not going to have some challenges. That doesn't mean that you're not going to have some problems that you'll be dealing with on a day-to-day basis. No, that doesn't mean any of that. No, that will not exempt you from that. But what it does mean is that now you will begin to take off on some new paths, to some newer horizons, that you'll begin to see life totally different than most people. I think that's what Henry David Thoreau meant when he said, "Most men live in quiet desperation." That most of us go through life because we're not using that which we've been given. That we are punished. That we're going through life getting up in the morning with no reason to get up. See, once you find out your purpose in life, and once you decide that you're going to live a life of sharing and giving and contributing to life, you don't need an alarm clock to get up. That you move differently. You have more life in you. But most people are walking around dead for years.
I could have been doing exactly what I'm doing right now, but I was afraid. I didn't feel I was worthy. And I didn't want to recognize that which I had been given. I had a limited view of me. And I was literally running away from me. I mean, life sometimes chases. And I said, "No, no, no. We want you to do something great." "No, not me." "Go get somebody else." "No, you're not talking about me." "No, no, no. We want you. We can just groom you and and train you and and get you ready." "Me?" "Yeah." "Are you sure?" "Me?" "Yeah. No, no. Not me. No, I just I'm just I know I want to."
Do that. See, ladies and gentlemen, one of the reasons that we should begin to give more is because we owe a debt. Reading a book, John Powell, "I'm afraid to tell you who I am because you might not like me," and that's all I've got line in there. I, I love to quote, "We are made by those who love us and by those who refuse to love us."
As I talk to you right now, you're looking at a lot of people up here, ladies and gentlemen. It's not just Les Brown standing here. A lot of people have contributed to make me who I am right now. None of us are here because of our own doing. All of us have had life to contribute to us, many times complete strangers. So, we all have cookie people in our lives.
What do you mean by cookie people? Cookie people and chicken soup people, as I call them when I do my workshops. Cookie people are people like Miss Lian. When my mother used to whip me as a kid, and I was a bad twin, always getting in trouble, Miss Lian would hear me screaming. And after Mama would get through, Miss Lian would come over to the house and give me some cookies and milk. And my, you know, and and my mama said, "What are you doing back, Lou?" "I'm just giving him some cookies." And she said, "Here you are, Leslie, even though you're a bad little boy, I brought you some cookies."
So, cookie people are people who, even when you are bad, even when you are not being who you really are, they look beyond your faults and see your needs. Even if you're a moody person and curse them out and dog about sometime, these cookie people love you unconditionally. How many of you have ever had had cookie people in your life? All right. So, we all have had cookie people that the universe has put in our lives to contribute to us.
The other people are the chicken soup people. Chicken soup people are people that you can call at 2:00 in the morning and say, "I got a flat tire, will you come help me?" Or, "My battery is not running, would you come give me a jump?" Or, "I need some help, would you come get me out of jail?" If you don't have some chicken soup people in your life, you better get some. But these are people that you can always call on to help you out.
So, I'm encouraging you to give a letter of appreciation to some of the cookie people in your life. Some of them might have already made their transition. Write some letters to some people who were a leg up for you, some people who contributed to you being who you are. And just say, "I was just thinking over the years, I know, you know, I love you and appreciate everything you've been to me, but I just wanted to drop you this letter." How do you think they'll feel if they get that? Just out of nowhere, "Just want to thank you for how you have enriched my life. You might not have thought much of it, but because of the help and assistance you gave me on that particular day, that was a turning point in my life."
Why should we give? Well, giving creates a vacuum, and as we know, nature abhors a vacuum. See, when you give, you create a vacuum. You are now in a position to receive. See, if I have my closet holding on to everything, I've got nothing that is available to come in. But if I'm open, if I've created a vacuum there by giving and keeping the flow going, the stuff in the universe is going to come back to me. Ladies and gentlemen, it's going to come back. Whatever you give.
Whenever I go into a room and give a speech to inspire people, to help them, to develop their greatness, if you get 10% of what I get, because as Boach says, "We teach that which we need most." I'm not wearing any crown. I need it as much as I'm sharing it. I'm still growing. I'm still unfolding. I'm still seeking to discover my greatness. And if you get 10% of what I get, when I walk out of here, see, there will be a different man walking out of here than who came in here. And as I give, the more I give to you, the more I get. Most people don't understand that. That's a law of life.
Do you know that we can literally eliminate poverty overnight? We can eliminate hunger and homelessness overnight if people understood the concept of what giving means and the power in it, about the difference that it can make in our lives. I guess if you go to any rundown neighborhood and interview the people there, evaluate their lifestyles and what they're doing and what they're contributing to life, and then go in a wealthy neighborhood and talk to those people and evaluate them and check out what they're doing with their energy and their time and what they're contributing to life, here's what you're going to discover.
What Earl Nightingale said, he said, "Our success in life is directly related to the quantity and the quality of the service that we give." I guarantee you that you will find that people who have more, people that are living the abundant life, are the contributors to life. Ladies and gentlemen, they are the people that are giving more. And the people who are operating out of scarcity and poverty consciousness, these are the people that are down and out. These are the people that are complaining. These are the people that are blaming the world and everybody for where they are. But if they took that same energy and begin to invest and give something back to life.
I was in New Jersey and I had to give a a political presentation to a group there that were trying to organize a community to begin to revitalize that particular community. And a guy was telling me very proudly as we were walking through a housing project, he said, "The city is about to give $55 million to renovate these housing projects." I said, "What a waste." He said, "Why would you say that?" I said, "Let me ask you something." And the person that was standing next to him, I said, "Do you live in this building here?" Said, "Yes." I said, "How many families live here?" He said, "Six families." I said, "We walked in the door and we can smell the stench of urine. Does it take a genius to go down to the store and perhaps sacrifice buying three packs of cigarettes and buy some Tide of soap and water and come back here and wash this stench out of here?" Does it take a genius? Get a can of paint and paint over the graffiti and repair the mailbox? Does it take a genius for that?
I say to you, you pour the money in these housing projects and you don't change the people that are living in the projects, before you completed, they'll be right back to where they were before. If it is to stand. And I'm not saying that there are situations where people need some help and assistance, but people must be allowed to contribute.
Here's something else you're going to discover in giving something that's very important: give thanks. Giving thanks creates power. Give thanks for your house, give thanks for your apartment, for your car, for your family, for your health, for your relationships, for what you have. When we focus on something, it expands. When you're giving thanks, when you're showing a spirit of gratitude for what I got, not that you're satisfied with it, but you're grateful for what you got. Whatever you focus on, that's what you're going to continue to multiply and expand in your life. But if you focus on what you don't have, if all you can do is point out the negative things in your life, whatever you focus on, you're going to expand that.
Some people, all they can do is complain. That's all they can. They can't find anything to say good about life or about anybody else. Every time they open their mouths, that's where their minds are consumed with, and that's all they're producing in their lives. And these are people that you don't want to be around. Develop a spirit of gratitude. I'm thankful for life. I'm thankful to be an American. I'm thankful to be on this part of the planet. I'm thankful to see another day. No, things aren't what I want them to be. No, I don't have all the things I want to have, but I'm thankful that I'm still here. I have another opportunity, another day to live, another chance to contribute, another chance to make a difference in life. So begin to give thanks for what you have. Whatever you focus on, remember now, you want to become aligned with the universe. If you have scarcity in your life, it's because you have a consciousness of scarcity. As you begin to become thankful for what you have, for the abundance that you now know is coming your way, that you're attracting to you, for the good relationship that is coming your way right now, it will begin to create incredible opportunities for you to begin to improve your life and the quality of life of people around you.
Giving is also, ladies and gentlemen, forgiving. Give forgiveness. Many of us do not realize that we cannot grow, that we are blocking ourselves. We are blocking our good in the universe. We're literally standing in the way of the flow of what life has through us because we haven't learned how to forgive. We haven't learned how to let things go so we can get on with our lives. When we forgive, ladies and gentlemen, it's not for the other person. Oh, no. It's for you. It's not for them, not because they deserved it or they earned it. You're forgiving other people. First of all, you've got to forgive yourself. But when you forgive other people, it is mentally and spiritually healthy to forgive, to let that luggage go. As Paul said, "Forgetting those things which are behind, reaching forth unto those things which are before." Oh, we hear it, but it's hard to do. It's hard.
What you have is enough. Whatever you have to give, and the the more you give, the more you realize you have to give. And we all have to. There are people who made the supreme sacrifice for us to enjoy freedoms that we take for granted. Oh, none of us, none of us can feel that we have nothing to give back.
If you do what is easy, your life will be hard. But if you do what is hard, your life will be easy. If you do what is easy, complain about your situation, your circumstances. If you do what is easy, stand around and be a volunteer victim like everybody else. If you do what is easy, surrender and give up on your dreams, become depressed and bitter and angry. Anybody can do that. If you do what is easy, your life will be hard.
But if you do what is hard, keep coming back again and again and again. If you do what is hard, approaching strangers, talking to people in shopping malls, get up, dressed every day, going out prospecting, knowing some way, somehow, with a spirit of expectation, somebody's out here looking for an opportunity. You can go outside right now and see some pigeons, but you're out hunting for eagles, and they are not common. And if you do that over and over and over again, somebody's going to show up. Somebody's going to say, "I'm the one."
Remembering what Dr. Robert Anthony said about results. When you keep your commitments, you're able to produce some different kinds of results in your life. So, how can we keep our commitments? And do we keep all commitments? No, we don't. You will not be at 100%. However, you will have a greater percentage rate of of maintaining your commitments to yourself. Whatever those things might be. If it's going into business, if it's if it's changing a habit that you know that works against you, if it's overcoming self-destructive behavior, if it's retraining your thinking, if it's reinventing yourself, if it's trying to begin to design your relationship differently. All of us have the possibility by focusing and really harnessing our attention and concentrating on it. We really have available to us the power to honor our commitments in those particular areas.
So, number one, make it a priority. See, you only make things happen. Your life only counts. You only make a difference when you are committed. When you make a commitment with your life. That's the people that make a commitment with their lives. The people that make a commitment to their customers, the people that make a commitment to their families, to their relationships, are the people that make the greatest impact in life.
What is commitment? Commitment is the salesman who says, "Look here, I'm going to make $1,000 today and I'm not going home. You can turn the lights out. The janitors could be here running the vacuum cleaner. I'm not leaving here until I do it." I used to be a door-to-door salesman. I had X number of TVs. I had a minimum amount that I knew I had to sell every day in order to provide for my mother who was ill at the time, who had lost her job at the Eminem cafeteria because of arthritis. And I said, "I'm going to go door to door." And sometimes I would not come home until 1:00 at night, knocking on people's doors. "People, closing. What do you want? Would you like to buy a nice working month's television set? No money down. No." "What about an Emerson TV?" "No, thank you very much. Do you know anybody else that would be interested?" "No, thank you kindly." Knock on another. "Hello, would you like to buy a nice working television set? No money down." "No, get away from our door. Thank you very kindly. Do you know anybody else would be?" "Yeah, my cousin. He lives $2 down." "Thank you very kindly. Tell him you sent me." "When now, hey, your cousin told me that you wanted to buy a television." "Said, told me to come here and talk to you. We got a special discount for you." "Yes, come in. I'm interested." I would just keep right on. I would not go home until I did it.
It's an interesting thing, ladies and gentlemen, that when we put ourselves in a situation where we say we're going to do it, it it puts you in another zone where the universe responds to you. When you have that kind of consciousness. See, the universe responds to the man or woman that refuses to be denied. Because that is your commitment. That business that you want, that book you want to write, that dream that you have of controlling your destiny, that is yours. That power to create that and to manifest that, that is yours. That's available to you. But you've got to be willing to stand there and face disappointment, not have support, be lonely, doubt yourself sometimes, be rejected again and again and again, become bankrupt if necessary, again and again and again, and refuse to turn around until life gives it up. Nothing can resist a person that has that kind of commitment.
The people that have made a difference on the planet. When John F. Kennedy said, "We will go to the moon in the next decade," he spoke it. That was a commitment. And people shared that vision. People bought into that. We've had all kind of examples in history where people have made declarations, who have committed their lives to bring about a difference. There are people who are taking a stand today against hunger. I guarantee you it will be a part of our past at some point in time. Someone took a stand against polio. It no longer plagues us as it once did because someone said, "It is my commitment to eradicate it from the face of the Earth." Someone made the commitment. The reason that we're here and enjoying a democracy that we have, someone made a commitment that whatever is required, if it means that I die. I remember Paul Roberson here. "I stand for. I can do no other." And that's how you must be.
Commitment means standing up for your life. It means honoring yourself. It means it means beginning to say and to to see and recognize your alignment and oneness with the universe, and that you're a channel for life to express through. And we short-circuit it with anger. We short-circuit it with fear. We short-circuit it with with envy. We short-circuit it by being lazy or apathetic or giving up easily. Why? Why? Why? We say, "Oh, it's too hard. It's too hard." We don't challenge our spirit. Ladies and gentlemen, there's nothing as powerful as the human spirit. You can't destroy it. You can pervert it, but you can't destroy it.
I, I was reading "Man's Search for Meaning" by Victor Frankl. What a powerful book. I'm reading it now for the seventh time. And he gives so many graphic examples of of the power of the human spirit. And so, what are some of the things that can can fortify us and and give us the kind of inner strength that will allow us to forward ourselves into the future by manifesting our commitments?
Number one, commitment means, in some cases, going back to school, getting some training, sitting up in classes with people younger than you, putting yourself in a position where you don't know, and that is awkward and uncomfortable. But because of your commitment to develop yourself, or to go back to school, to get a high school diploma, or to get a college degree, that it doesn't matter feeling dumb and saying, "What am I doing here?" Setting up in some boring class. Commitment could mean a lot of things. It could mean that you begin to go back. You got to back up sometimes. Means to back up and not give up. To regroup. Back up and regroup and come back again. Because life is way laid you because you got knocked down.
I know when when I was working on my dream, there were times I, I lost my house. At one point, I lost my car. I was broke. My credit was bad. I was sleeping at different friends' houses, on their couch or on the floor. There were times, months, that I slept on the floor of my office and got up early and dressed before my staff got there to give them the impression that I got there early before they did. And we all pretend not to know what we knew that the boss was staying in the office. So we never talked about it. But I refused. I refused to give up on my dream. And what happens? They say, you know, "In the prosperous years, you put it in your pocket. In the lean years, you put it in your heart." It makes me appreciate it even more. Even more. I, I wouldn't trade it. I wouldn't trade it for anything. The disappointment, the pain that I have gone through by keeping the commitment.
Keeping the commitments that you have might mean taking a stand that's unpopular. Something was said one time. When you take a position, the Kardis ask the question, "Is it safe?" Politics ask the question, "Is it popular?" But conscience or commitment ask the question, "Is it right?" And see, most people rather operate from the first two. "Is it safe for me to take this position?" I remember when I was a state legislator, I saw guys and and women who believed in legislation very strongly, but because the Speaker of the House said, "We won't go with that," they backed down. And they felt bad about it. They wouldn't take the position because they didn't want the Speaker of the House to be angry at them. They wanted to be all right with all of the rest of our colleagues.
See, it takes a great deal of strong courage and commitment on your part to step out of line. To, you know, with Henry David Thoreau says, "A man doesn't keep pace with his companions, perhaps he's listening to the beat of a different drum. Let him dance to the music that he hears, however measured or far apart." When you are committed, you're dancing to the beat of a different drum. Don't expect people to understand you. Don't expect it to make sense to anybody. Why you've got to do this? Why you've got to go? "Why leave this is a good job? They pay you well. I'm going." "You're just a few years from retirement. I'm going." "Why? I don't understand." "You don't have to. I'm going for me because I've made a different kind of commitment with my life. This is something I have got to do."