Transcription
I'm asking about ranking and what's the problem with ranking women? Um, I think I do agree that we rank everything in life. Um, women, I wouldn't say that we rank, I would use a different word. I think we categorize men. Um, which may be a type of ranking, but, um, I mean, so when you say ranking, are you referring to you're comparing them?
Yes. To each other or just to your standard? No. You see, you're 32. Mhm. You ever been married? No. Any children? Not yet. Uh-huh. Well, when a man asks you to go out, you decide what man you give your information to and what man you don't give your information to. That's a ranking. How tall are you? 5'5. 5'5. Do you care if a man is only 5'6 when you're dating him? Um, that's a ranking. The pause is a ranking. Yeah. See, y'all have no problem. Y'all got no problems with ranking men.
If a man was working and making $15 an hour, would you marry him and be with him for the rest of your life if that's all he was going to make? Minimum. $15. $37,000 is what the median income for a male in this country was. You'd be happily married to him and submit to him for a lifetime. Um, if he's married to me, he's that's going to change. So, no, no, no, no, no, no. I said if he's just an average, an average man. See, y'all all think I have the power. No, no, no. See, y'all all think you have the power of Thanos to make not what it is. I said if a man was just an average earning man. See the fact that you can't even. Yeah, I I can't. You're right. I can't live off that because, sure, you can. If anything were to happen, um, to to me and if he would have to take care of everything, I wouldn't be able to sustain. Like I would have to. What do you mean you couldn't sustain? I mean, there's half the country doing that. I mean, like I I would have to, um, change some things. If if if we were living just off his income, I would have to to change a lot.
Did you go to college? I did. Mhm. Did your mother go to college? Um, she didn't. Your father go to college? Did your father go to college? He had a trade. Uh-huh. So your mother and father didn't go to college. They made you. It's funny that the very people who come from nothing got so high of a standard for the next group of men.
What does a traditional housewife entail? Well, you tell me, 'cause you said you're not one. Uh, you picked the right one. You know, housewife. I'm just imagining kind of being a slave. So, that's. Let me stop you right here. Let me stop you right here. Let me stop you right here. Mhm. Where are your people from? Uh, my mom's from Trinidad and my dad's from Jamaica. So, I see that's. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. We don't need white. We don't need white supremacy, racism, when all we got is this. That you think that the women who came before you were slaves? It's not. It's not that necessarily, but just what I'm seeing in in the media and just all around me. I see women trying to be this housewife for men, traditional housewife for men, and they're just getting like, you talking about when women a woman who's. Let's do it. Let's do it. Traditional housewife. What media are you talking about? Uh, so let's uh I I mean, I don't know. Like I said, I want you to define what traditional housewife. No, no, no, no, no. You being home. You can't over talk me. That's how we know we don't do that. Stick it down. What media are you talking about? Social media. Where do you see traditional housewives in social media? Everywhere. Do you? Well, I mean that I know of. Just women getting taken care of and not working. No. So that's what a traditional house might be. Taking care of and not working to me. Yes. Oh, okay. So, uh, and that's getting the into the stick. Uh, from what I've seen so far, yes.
So, we supposed to teach you how to be a wife. How to be a wife? Yeah. So, how to be a wife? You can learn that from your mother. Yes. But I was raised by my father. Now, my mother is in my life right now. But I could say that my father taught me how to be a wife or a woman to a man. I could say that. And how to be one. Exactly. 'Cause the way women teach us how to be a wife and the way men teach us how to be a wife are completely two different.
Are you married? No, I'm not. I was engaged, but I'm not married. See, men teach men customize women for them. See, but that's the thing. My father didn't. I'm 31. What do you want to talk to me about? Um, you know, I'm a boss woman. And I just was out at my booth, you know, doing my popup shop today. And I went to college and I believe that I can have a family one day. I believe that. How many kids you got? No kids. Okay. You believe you can have a family? Okay. Yeah. I believe I can meet my match. Find someone that. Roll it back. No. No. You don't do. I'm sorry. You don't know. We don't over talk. That's one thing you don't. I'm sorry. I'm getting people go to my page, my website, 'cause I'm talking to you. So it's like, wow. I was shocked that. Well, turn off the comments and have the conversation. Let's talk. Help me out, Kevin. I don't know why. I don't know why. I mean, if you already have it all figured out, why you need my help? I mean, I want to help your your viewers, too, see my point of view and talk to you and have a conversation. I don't think my I don't think my viewers want to hear a woman tell them anything. I don't want to tell them. I want to answer your questions. I You said you wanted to talk to me. Go ahead. I just want to talk about a conversation about how I can meet my match. How can I make. I don't know what your match is. I don't know what your match is. What do you want? I want someone that, you know, can match my drive, my ambition, you know, someone that can bring to the table what I bring to the table as a woman. You know, I want someone that can meet, you know, my match. How's that working out for you? It's been working out great, but, you know, honestly, I don't think guys at this point in my career are what I need to focus on. Like, I just want to focus on myself. And then when I get to a level where I'm comfortable, you know, I want to settle down and that's what's in my vicinity.
What percentage of men earn $650,000 or more? Well, from the conversation I heard you speak about earlier, um, it sound like it was less than 10%. 10% of men earn $100,000. Okay. Top 5% around $4 million. $300,000 you start dropping around 3%. You get over $500,000 you're talking about 1% and you're talking more than that. So you're talking about a fraction of a percent. So if he can meet. So if a man they can meet that and how you said how tall 5 what? Say that again. How tall are you again? You said you're 5' what? I'm 5'5. 5'8 with heels. Okay. So how tall does he need to be? Um, anywhere like 5'8 and taller. I'm flexible. Okay. Uh, if this man can meet your socioeconomic standard, which is rather on the higher side, I think it's fair to say he can meet most women's. What do you think a man who makes that kind of income, what is some of the things they would want from a woman? I definitely feel they want a baddie for sure. A what? A baddie. Like they want somebody who is like a 10, 10 for sure. Um, somebody who's well-kept, well put, dresses well, speaks well, um, articulate, great conversation, and be in a crowd with anybody and be able to be put together. Who's described? I described a man. Mhm. You're describing the prototypical Tyler Perry, Sex in the City, Metro female fantasy. You said you had a 9-year marriage that you that you divorced from and you had a relationship that you left 'cause he cheating. Yeah. And you never cheated? I have. Exactly. And how long ago that did did that end? About maybe seven years ago. And what have you been doing since then? Well, that's when I started working on myself. But see, that's the that's I don't understand. Seven years, man. I'm not 37 or 44. Jesus Christ. How long are y'all supposed to French toast work?
What do you need from a man financially? For him to hold it down. What does that mean? So, what that means is, you know, as a woman and I put a dollar value on it. Don't don't don't give me the yearbook answer. Um, at least at least a minimum of six figures. Minimum. My problem is is that I tend to attract narcissists and I'm the complete opposite of a narcissist. Like, I'm bored. Oh, okay. Um, and I know I'm I'm literally saying like I'm I'm bored is a reason a lot of women leave. But see, so honestly, what what men hear is there's no reason to be a good guy because you know, when I was a good guy, women left me. But when I became a player, that have no problem. It's not many options. That's another thing. Oh, there plenty of options. 50 51% of black men are single and childless. 64% are in the middle class. See, what they're not a lot of them are ugly. Oh, no, no, no. First off, check that because you start that. I'm going to get real raw with you. But it's they. I'm going to get real raw with you. Check that because I have not made any any presumptions about looks or anything with you. So, I'm not going to insult men. You can't. I look a mess now, but I don't think I have to settle with a man that I don't find.
Okay, let's do it. What would you rate yourself on a scale from one to 10? Just your face. You cannot use seven. A 10. Oh, poor baby. Now, let's try this again. So, I. You are not the most beautiful woman in the world. Cosmopolitan ain't trying to get you to be on the cover. People ain't deemed you one of the most beautiful women in the world. You first thing you came out of your mouth, you said you're a 10 and you're not a 10. My face is not a 10. I don't have no makeup on and my hair is not done. And this is all real hair. Mhm. So, all right. I think I'm definitely a 10. Cool. I bet you do. So, when when was the last time you did any runway modeling or print modeling? I've never been involved in that. Why not? Tens. That's what tens do. Not all tens. Oh, yeah. Not all tens, but you know what? You live in New York, right? Mhm. Right. See, when you're a 10, people discover you at the bank, at the bodega, at the gym. That happened when I was younger. My father. Okay, we gonna keep on moving. You're not a 10. You living in. And and a lot of you ladies just say this because you said I'm not. You're not. You're not a 10. What would you rate me as? My favorite. I'm not going. No, no, you're not a. 'Cause you're rating yourself up there with Rihanna and Halle Berry when she was young. That's what you're rating yourself. What would you give yourself on a scale from 1 to 10? Fresh face out of the shower. Your natural hair, you cannot use seven. On a regular day, I'd say maybe a six. Okay. I would give you a six. And a six is cute. A five is average. So if you're a cute woman, that's one step above average. Okay? Average means average. You look at your look in your your family history and most people are average. Right at the top of the bell curve. But if you take an a if you take a cute woman who's overweight. Mhm. That adjusts her SMV up or down? Down. Thank you. So that makes her average. As that makes as those two numbers, they kind of average out. You would be an average woman and as an average about an average woman in this country, an average black woman, the average black man in this country earns $41,500 for a lifetime. No more, no less, no herculean methods, no lottery, no businesses. That's what he's going to make. That's your husband. But what if I have degrees? Thank you. See, see, I want you guys to understand. She just asked me and I told her what is a woman has her SMV. Now, these women actually think because they can make themselves higher SMV because of a degree. That does not work. Men have never picked women based upon your degree. That is why you could be on fries at McDonald's, but if you look like Kelly Rowland, you can marry a millionaire. But you could graduate from Harvard, but if you look like Precious, you ain't got nothing coming.
A lot of my Jewish friends were married during college. Exactly. And so when I ask you, why aren't you married? You. You look like I asked you something difficult. Why aren't you married yet? No, no, I don't think it's difficult. Um, don't want to get married this young. I'm I I I love my boyfriend. I'm happy being right. You better say that 'cause he going to see the video. But you. But he. But why don't you marry him yet? Um, he wants to get married. Okay. So, he's broke. No, he's not broke. So, he's. So, he's. So, what's wrong with him? Nothing's wrong with him. So, let me get this right. He's not broke and he wants to marry you. But you don't want to get married. What's wrong with you? Oh, I never said I don't want to get married. Well, I asked you why aren't you married? We're just not married yet. How long you been together? We've been together. We're going on 2 years. Why aren't you married? It takes us 6 months. So, let me get this right. He wants to get married. Yes. He's told you he wants to marry you. Yes. And you told him to go buy a ring. Yes. And he has it. Oh, I have a ring. Yeah. He's dropped on one knee and proposed to you. Yes. And you said what? Of course I said yes. Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. Whoa, whoa. Of course you said yes. Uh, that would make a fiance, not a boyfriend. I mean, no, no, no, no, no, no. I was very clear. You dropped on one knee, ring, proposed. You said yes. That makes a fiance, not a boyfriend. Yes. So why you calling your fiance your boyfriend? Because it's very new. That's. Most women who are. No. No. No. That is. That is bull. That is. That is. When women get when women get engaged to a man they like and they got a ring, they can't wait. No. That's why I think about the threshold.
Okay. So, there are several things I'm thinking about and then I know strategy. So, I could take a plumber and and have him have an entire business because that's the way that my mind works. And so, I would make that work for us. Put your penis up. Somebody laughing. You see what you just did? I just. You see what you just did? I gave you I gave you a man who's. I gave you a man who's out doing just fine on his own and you got to go make him make him earn one and and and be like you. That ain't going to work. Boo. It's not. So you're going to emasculate the hell out of him 'cause it's like, well, now I'm trying. I've been Thomas. You've been a plumber for 20 years and you're just happy. Yeah. But now she got me trying to have a truck and this and that going over here and why? Well, 'cause she's used to birthing bags and you know, she thinks we can become accrediting credit investors and and what's that going to be like sitting up in the bed on Sunday when Thomas wants to sleep in? Hey, you know, you should get up and start that website. We could do this, we could do that. Now, you see why I say somebody got to be on the same frequency as me. Somebody that enjoys preparing and creating a masculine frequency. Oh, okay. You're not on the right. You're on a masculine frequency. Okay. So, if you want somebody on that. Okay. Are you all right being one of five? Oh, I already had that scenario and I I didn't like that. Well, then are you all right with letting Thomas just be. You're not going to accept Thomas? Why does Thomas have to be my scenario though when I'm surrounded by men that are like engineers and they don't baby. Mas 40 years old? The bottom line is you don't want it to be 50/50. But here's the thing. Okay. So that so so listen, this is important. Ready? That means this career you're talking about, you going to give it up anyway because the real career is your husband. He's going to be bringing in all the money. If you get the man you want, he's going to be the major breadwinner. You are not going to be responsible. So, this extra degree, extra thing is all actually not going to an outcome. It's just sitting on the wall. You think so, ma'am? If you have a husband paying 75% of everything and you're paying 25%. You are not in a career. You got a job. He's carrying the lion's share. So why do you need a master's or anything else like that to cover 25%? No. No. Listen. I was going to give because this is what so many sisters don't do. They just go talk about jobs and careers and this, but when it gets right down to it, I really don't want to have to be the one responsible for the financial load. I hope God blesses me with a man that I can be, and that's fine. So, start with the end in mind.
Okay. I have um I need some I have need some advice. Um I'm a I'm a 37 year old woman. Um two children. Okay. I do not have a problem getting a man. It's just I attract weak men. Okay. I am celibate. I've been celibate for two years. What? I've been celibate for two years. Where where did that come from? Is I'm want to know is that the reason why you just you two people that came out of you. What you talking about? I'm ser I'm trying to understand what what's the what's the philosophy here? You're not a virgin. You got two people came out of you. What what what's going on? Oh, that's. Oh, no, you did not. Oh, no. You did not have the nerve to bring vagina out here and close it up at 37 years old with two kids out here. And I'm going to tell you the reason behind that is because when I do open my legs, they the men be they get crazy pew whipped. Yes. I. So the. So the solution is. So. So let me get this right. So let me get this right. So you meet a man that's a high value man. A a good guy. You think you're going to be celibate for what? What? To marry? Yes. You got your goddamn mind. I wish I would meet a 37 year old with two kids and think you going separate checks. Separate checks. Check, please. No. No. Listen, listen, listen, man. I'm making light of it because it is crazy. You're almost 40 years old with two kids talking about celibate. You need to be trying to give that away to secure a man. No. No. No. No. Listen. No. No. No. You're talking about. Okay. What you said is you attract lower value men. Not really. I. Okay. Not the right men, crazy men, whatever. Not. Not good guys. Weak. Let's put that. Lower value is weak. Okay. Okay. So, when I said if you attracted a higher value man, you think you're going to make him wait until marriage? How do you think that's sweetheart? I'm going to tell you like this. My cookies is worth the wait. Well, first off, check that. Sweet. No, your cookies ain't worth the wait because you ain't made nobody wait. You got two kids without a marriage.
I was married. Name me the product that gains value with age and use. A product that gains value with age and use. Yeah. I want to say. Uh-huh. I'm going to say your mind, but I may be different. I may I know. I said a product. Can. Where can you go buy a mind? A product. A product. A product. I don't know. But I'm pretty sure you going to tell me. Uh, yeah. Nothing. Oh, wow. Nothing. And let's just talk about your cookies. They're getting older and they've been used. That don't mean nothing. You're right. They don't. Oh, you are honest. No, I'm honest. I'm honest, ma'am.
What can you an individual do about an industry that's dying? Stay positive. Excuse me. Positive in your own. Stay positive. There are people who. There were. Okay, ma'am. There were people who sold horses and buggies, but when the automobile came along, you could have made the best horse and buggy and the best horse. You could be as positive as you want. When the market died, you were out of business. Or you just downsize. There's downsize for no demand. You can't downsize you. Okay. How can you downsize if you were a small? That person had a 9-to-5 job. How could she downsize being one year in business? And see what I'm showing you guys is this is a 20 some odd year old woman who is too stubborn sign language to admit that she don't know what the hell she's talking about. This woman is young enough to be my daughter. She ain't completed nothing in life. She ain't even complete college. And that's the point. And this is the problem. And you wonder why women who who look like you, who think like you, and who act like you are chronically single. You need to understand what a man that you would want, what he would want in a girlfriend, wife, or significant other. Like a good like a good mother. No, no, no. That changes from every man. That changes from man to man. Where's your father? Oh, I don't. I don't have. I didn't grow up with a mother or a father. All right. So, with all due respect, you you you you've you don't seem to get that men judge the way we judge. And yes, like I said, you have no problem getting men to pay you attention. You've got no problem attracting men, but getting a man to take you seriously and would you like to be married? I would. Okay. And that's a problem because you're asking a man to become a stepfather. You're asking me, let's say you're asking me to come in and take care of one man's child, a man's two children. I didn't create those. It's all downside. I've been a stepfather. It's a horrible deal. What about the men that have children of their own? They want a stepmother. Well, again, you still act as though you stage. Okay, listen. I'll answer it. See, you're still you're still speaking as if you have leverage in this thing. And I'm trying to level set you. Even if I have children, I got more options than you. I can go find a woman with no kids 'cause I can afford both of you. If I can afford if I can afford to take care of you and your kids, I can afford to take care of her and and no kids. Yeah. Why would I pick you and your kids when I know your kids are not going to. I'm not their father. They'll never look at me as their father. I got all the responsibility and none of the upside of being a biological father. Can I discipline those children like they were my own? They don't need discipline. They're very. I see that's your problem. There you go. Right there. I'm not saying we should have a special victim status, but our circumstance is different. We are women with. Is 24 years old. Is your circumstance harder or easier than your grandmother and your great-grandmother? Exponentially easier. We have access to information we didn't have. Exponentially easier, but you're handling it worse. Your grandmother, your great-grandmother actually could work with a black man with more trauma because they understood that the black woman and the black man are on the same side. Now that we are all free and independent and to we could do whatever we want to, why would we seek to, you know, be one with the black man. We we even think that being. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Clip it, slice it, put it on World Star. She said it, not me. Now that you're independent, you don't need to be with. There you go. There you go. And there. And there you go. There you go, black men. There it is. She's finally finally got one to say it. Build businesses with us. Your grandmothers, your grandmothers, and your grandmothers and your great-grandmothers had more trauma and more stress and did it better.
If you went to work for a company and you gave them five years and in that five years they benefited from your creativity, from your ingenuity, they increased their profits. All these things happened. You gave them your blood, sweat, and tears and the and the employment terminated for any reason. You could not continue to expect to be paid for six months. You would cut off at the at the last day of your employment. You could not go back to that office. You could not use the computer. The comp. Listen, okay, listen. I need I need you to listen. I need you to listen. I I I didn't cut you off. You couldn't get use the company car, the company credit card. It would end. And you couldn't say, "Well, you guys owe me this because you made so much money. You. That's not how it works. It's over." Do you. Do you accept that? Do you accept that in the work world? First off, you accept that in the work world that that's how it happens. The reason I don't accept what you're saying is because in the work world unemployment so because unemployment is not paid by the unemployment is not played. First off, unemployment is not your full salary and it's paid through the state and you have to qualify. If you get terminated for cause, you don't get unemployment. The point is you're still asking you're still getting the same benefit as if you were in an active relationship when it's over. So when I asked if he could actively have sex with you, that would be ridiculous. If it would be no be no more ridiculous than someone expecting to get full benefit of a company when they've been terminated or where they quit. I was no longer getting full benefit. It was just partial. The home and the car. I was not getting my hair, my nails, my trips, my shopping, my whole entire life anymore. It was just whatever left of it that I had because, you know, that was what I was stuck with, the home.
How much money would you want your husband to really earn annually? To live the life you want to eat, travel, hair, makeup, shopping, caring for family. Come on, give it to me. Don't Don't hide it. $500,000. All right. What percentage of men earn that? Huh? Very little. What percent? Well, I mean, if you're talking all races, I would think. I just said, what percentage of men earn that? Oh, maybe like what? 7% or something. Not 1%. 1%. 3% earn around $300,000 more. $500,000 of the top 1% of all men. And guess what? Men don't go and do what they have to do to become those kind of men. And what age do you think those men are when they're earning that kind of money? 40s, right? And what do men want who have fought in corporate America or fought in the work world for 20 plus years? They want kids and a legacy. True. And but I do want kids now. That was my path. But that's but that's recent. What you said earlier was what I believe to be the truth. I want to focus on my husband. Great. That will make you a good first wife or a starter wife. But typically men want legacy. They want a woman who's going to give them three or four kids for that half a million dollars they're earning because they got to pass it on somewhere. They don't want to leave it to their dog. Oh, so the kind of men you're dating probably are these guys who want a woman that'll do the power couple thing. Y'all on some 50/50 splitting the bill kind of which is fine. Oh no. Oh no.
The some of the the misperceptions and misconceptions about some of the things I said in that video that I want to go through real quick. First and foremost, okay, I don't think all men are trash. And I also want to again in shut this down. Tommy Lauren is teaching black women a very valuable lesson. A very valuable lesson. What is that? You cannot just drag men and get away with it. The point I made is notice Tommy's demeanor. Notice how she's coming in to fix this. She said all men are trash. That's what she said. All men are trash. She didn't edit anything. She doubled and tripled down. She was she was full of that. Uh uh uh because she didn't get any pushback. 'Cause what is why? Because this playbook had worked in the black community for 50 years. But see the white community, other communities where they have family system, uh patriarchy, family values, if nothing else, they have seen what is happening in our community. What happens when you let this gender war take root? Men are pushing back and they are shutting this crap down. Tommy Lawrence got something to teach you. Think about it. This was what was going on in our community for 50 years. This didn't even get a week. She made a video on Monday and on Thursday she was back. She was moonwalking backwards like a mug.
What would you rank yourself on a scale from 1 to 10? You cannot use seven. Would I rate myself? Just your face. Um, my face when I wake up, five, but when I put myself together, six. Okay. And how tall are you? 5'5. Dress size. I'm sorry. Your dress size? A three. Okay. So, that makes you, if you give yourself a five, that's average. Yes. So average-looking women tend not to get high-earning men. They tend to get average men. So, um, did you did you. I mean, stop right there. Stop right there. Stop right there. Breathe and digest. You're 35 years old and you can look around and see the world. You don't tend to see higher-earning men with average-looking women off rip. If you do see them, they got them. They got their average-looking woman when they were both really young and he built his way up. But a man earning the kind of money you're talking about does not go for an average-looking woman.