Transcription
[Music] Moving on to the Hollywood Freeway, we have a multiple vehicle, multiple injury accident. An absolute mess from Vine Street to the Valley. If you're in, expect a long commute. If you're not, seek alternate routes.
If Dan doesn't want to do a deal, rate, we can talk about a weekly rate. But I'm telling you right now, I'm not going below a million. I mean, think about it. I'm risking my reputation as the host of this country's number one nationally syndicated talk show to do a cameo in some cheap slasher flick. I mean, why can't these guys write me a decent part? You know, I live through the thing. By the way, did you talk to Kathy about that Navy SEAL script?
Hang on a sec. Hello? Hello? Who's this? Who's this? Who are you calling? Oh, you know what? I'm sorry, I have the wrong number. That's okay. Wait a minute. I I know your voice. You sound a lot like that guy on TV. Um, Cotton Weary. I do? Huh? Yeah, I think he's got a really sexy voice. Oh, well, thank you. Wait a minute. You are Cotton, aren't you? Oh my God, I am talking to Cotton Weary. I can't believe this. You got me. Look, I've got someone on the other line. Can you hold on one second? I'll be right right back. I promise. Yeah, okay. Yeah. Andrea, uh, I got to call you back. Someone's on the other line. So, uh, you a big, uh, 100% Cotton fan? Yeah, 110%. That's very good. So, um, why don't you tell me who you are? Oh. You're a naughty boy, Cotton. Now, what would your girlfriend say? What makes you think I have a girlfriend? I know you do. I'm right outside her bathroom door. Who is this? She's in the shower. She's got a nice little voice. Let's come in for a closer look. She's very pretty, Cotton. A step up from Maureen Prescott. Speaking of which, let's play a little game. Answer right, your girlfriend lives. Answer wrong, she dies. Where's Maureen's daughter, Sydney? Who the [ __ ] is this? Somebody you'd kill to know where Sydney Prescott is. One chance, Cotton. You've got connections. Where is she? You listen to me, you [ __ ] psycho. You lay a finger on Christina and I swear to God, I'll kill you. Wrong answer. No, wait. Hello? [ __ ]! Hey, get away! You just hit me!
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Christine, if you're there, pick up the phone. Christine, pick up the phone. Oh, [ __ ]!
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[Music] You have reached 911. New to the volume, the goddamn phone. Please hold. Will be answered in order. Thank you.
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[Music] Shh. Cotton, is that you? Cotton?
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[Music] Honey. Okay, Cotton. You know I don't like your stab game.
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Who is it? Who's there? Christine. H. You all right? I'm home. Jesus, you scared the [ __ ] out of me. I'm not going to believe what just happened to me. What are you talking about? Get the H. I'm here. Okay, okay. I'm sorry, babe. I didn't mean to scare that bad. It's me. Come on, open the door. What are you doing? What, what the [ __ ] are you doing? I don't. I was just, you know, trying to take the game to the next level. I'm sorry. Come on, open the door. Chris. Yeah, the game. What are you talking about? Talking about how much fun it's going to be to rip your insides out. Open the [ __ ] door. Chris!
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[ __ ]! Christine, hun. The recent epidemic of road rage in Los Angeles. Innocent commuters mercilessly terrorized, even killed by these madmen of the freeway. Going to bring some of these guys in here and we're going to make them confront their victims face-to-face. Monologue right here on 100% Cotton. Carnage on our streets. Remember, it could happen to you tomorrow. On 100% Road Rage LA. Leaders fight back. The news is next on Channel 6 with our exclusive entertainment report live from tonight's celebrity premiere in Hollywood, followed by Night Time Class.
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Oh.
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[ __ ]! Chris, is that you, babe? Chris, if you're in there, open the door. Okay, honey. Chris, come on, baby. Open the door. Chris. Oh, me. Chris, what are you doing? Stay back. Stay back. Chris, what's going on, babe? You've gone crazy. That's what. Chris, was somebody in the house? Get back. Okay, okay, okay. Just calm down. Okay. You want to kill me? What are you talking about? Oh my God. You want to kill me? Give me the club. All right, honey. Give me the club. Give me the club, please. Christine, get out of the way. Behind.
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You [ __ ]! It was a simple game, Cotton. You should have told me where Sydney was. Now you lose.
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