The Pedestal Effect will make you instantly magnetic

Why is it the more you put something on a pedestal, the more resistance is created? Why is it the more you treat someone like a celebrity, the more they treat you like a fan? Why is it when you finally let go of wanting that thing? And when you finally take that thing off the pedestal, that thing then comes naturally for you. You're good either way with how things happen. And then you can energetically finally interact with that thing or that person.

In this video, I'm going to show you something that once I learned completely transformed my life. I'm going to show you something that will make you more magnetic than ever and allow you to stop putting people, things, energies on a pedestal so that you can finally allow yourself to feel enough and allow yourself to realize that you can trust the universe or God or the divine in a much deeper way.

Now, first off, let's go over the pedestal effect. And I want to talk a little bit about the origins of it, how I found it, and how it completely transformed my life. So, first off, this is an idea that I actually found in a book called Reality Trans Surfing. Reality Trans Surfing is a book written by a Russian quantum physicist who talks a lot about the idea that there's an infinite number of parallel realities that exist. And it's a very interesting book. I was actually uh met somebody who was very successful who told me that there were two billionaires that this person knew and both of them read this book. I thought it was interesting. I thought maybe they're just Russian but also I thought maybe they uh there was something to it. So what I did is I eventually got the book and I read it and there was something about it that resonated with me. You know it talks about parallel realities. It talks about um some of these radical concepts that really switched my frame of reality for understanding things. And what I want to do in this video is show you that powerful idea that I think can change your life, but also apply it to deep emotional work and different patterns where you'll see like, wow, this works in so many different ways and the answer and the cure to it changes everything.

So first off, the main idea in the book is that there's an infinite number of realities and we experience that which is equal to our energy. Now the idea is that anything we put on a pedestal, we immediately create what is called excess importance around. And anytime we have something that's important, we create resistance. And that resistance blocks us from actually experiencing that thing. And what happens is the key is to actually see it as neutral, to see it as natural for your identity. Now think about it. If you want something, now first off, the more you want anything, the more you put it on a pedestal and the degree to which you want it is the degree and the and the degree to which you're attached to the outcome puts it even higher on the pedestal. And what happens is then it's even further away from you. You can think about this too with people. If you meet someone and you really really want their approval and validation, well, it'd be so amazing to have that. The higher up they're on the pedestal and the more they're looking down at you. We live in a reality where everything tends to play off our energy. So people, opportunities, and situations tend to mirror back the energy we are projecting out. So the more you put something on a pedestal, the further away it is and the more resistance is created inside of your body.

Now what this is saying to the universe, basically if you think about it in the form of this concept, I'm going to make this more relatable here in a minute too. But the idea is that it's not equal to you. You want it so bad and you're attached to outcome and you believe this thing will complete you. Therefore, it's further away. But when it's you're good either way and it's natural for you and you in a calm regulated nervous system around it, you're more likely to experience it because the reality is equal to the energy you're putting out.

So for example, I remember one time I went with a friend back in 200 I don't even remember what year this was. I was uh actually I do it was probably 2008 2009. I was out of high school and I was going to get my first job and after a certain job I had more of a serious type job where I'd be there a little bit longer and I went to this place. It was actually called Zapos back in the day. It was in Vegas and I went with a friend of mine that dragged me to it cuz we were going to hang out and he's like, "You want to come to this group interview?" And I was like, "All right." I come to this group interview with him and we go through and it's a very eclectic place. There's like uh streamers in the offices and there's like a sleeping room which was very like revolutionary back in the day. Uh there was ice hockey and all these like games to play. And I remember going and I was like, "Oh, this is so interesting. It's kind of fun." And I remember in the group interview they said that they liked weird people. Like we like eclectic people. So I was like, "All right, I'm just going to be as weird as possible and have fun with this." So I go with my friend and I'm just like they tell us that and I just start being really weird. Not really weird, but I just start saying like weird things and I start seeing how far I could push it. They're like, "What are your hobbies?" And I'm like, "Ah." I was like, "I like I like jump rope and hopscotch." And sometimes I'll go into the neighborhood with my brother and my sisters and I'll challenge all the kids to a hopscotch competition. And then we'll I just like made I just said all this crazy stuff because I did not care about the job. But it was kind of like a fun energy. But I remember that at the end of that experience, guess who got the job offer? Well, the job offer I got, I didn't care at all. I could care less. I was just having fun with it. My friend wanted the job and didn't get it. It was on a pedestal and it was this thing that was obviously resistance there.

Have you ever seen some people that tend to be able to date? It's going to sound kind of like superficial. People that are able to date people that maybe you would perceive of being way out of their league. They're people that um you're like, "How is this person dating this person?" But it's easy for them and maybe they normally do that. It's like nor they're nor that's like their normal set point and people respond to them in that way and they just find themselves in situations like that. Well, in a similar way, it's normal for that person. They're able to walk up to somebody and be themselves, not put that person on a pedestal, and therefore there's more energy flow and exchange there. So what's interesting about this is there's an internal par not par internal like barometer of how we relate and what our nervous system does around certain people. So in that one situation that I shared it was like the more I was able to see it at I was able just having fun with it. I was present to the moment. Now the other side of this is when there's an attachment to outcome that also creates resistance in the energy. So what we want to do is become aware of where are we projecting importance and a belief that something else has power over us which is what is happening in situations like this.

I even think to myself when I first got on YouTube and I started to meet people that were uh well-known YouTubers, people with really big following, some of which are, you know, many of which are friends of mine in some format now. Um, some of which I remember when I first met them, one of my good friends, he's worth over a hundred million dollars, has a big company, and I remember when I met him, I just there was like this energy dynamic there where there was like I would kind of put him on a pedestal because of how successful he was. And it was this energy where there was a certain dynamic that we had for a while. And then when I actually broke through of putting him on anything on importance or projecting that energy onto him, that's when finally there was respect. Part of that meant breaking a certain pattern, which I'll talk about in a minute. Because when you see this around your patterns and how this works around like certain patterns that block you, you'll see that this is really an importance play. This is really what's happening.

So, I remember that as I got on YouTube and as I started to become more wellknown, I guess, and meet these other people that I kind of had images of, what I realized is everybody is a human being. Everybody has their own stuff going on. And any halo effect we put around people is purely a projection. Like the people that you meet that are maybe really well-known and famous, they get people all the time that project stuff onto them and it's very hard to connect because it always feels like people want something from them. But if you were to talk to those people like just regular humans and connect with them, there would be this energction energy is also resistance energy. It's energy that actually blocks you from connecting because it's not actually equal to reality.

So the thing to understand about this first and foremost that when we talk about things we put on a pedestal is realize that it is pure projection. It is projecting onto someone else a certain level of importance and that importance creates resistance. Now, even when I think about this, not just with people, but in different areas of my life, one thing I've recognized recently, the most successful I've ever been in my business and in my like mission and purpose, I notice the moments of when there's the most growth. You want to know when it comes? Do you think it comes when I'm really focused on the growth and I'm really intending for the growth and it's really important that things grow or do you think it's more when I'm good either way? What I've noticed is the most money that comes into my life isn't when I'm focused on money and I make it important to make money. The most money that comes into my life or the most growth on my social media or any kind of videos that I make, etc. It doesn't come from when I'm trying to force videos or make videos really important and they have to get views. It's when I'm focused on enjoying the process. It's when I'm good either way because I like the content. Like even in the videos that you see me make now with these whiteboard videos, I've had this resurgence of making these whiteboard videos and it comes from an energy of passion and whether they do well or not, I enjoy making the videos. So there's a different energy there you might be able to feel. Whereas a while ago, a couple months ago, I was just doing so many different things that it's like it felt it felt more chaotic and there was honestly more attachment to how things did. Now there's more of a connection to how can I explain ideas in a more powerful way. How can I connect different things that I teach and that I learn about myself or clients and how can I teach it in a way that will add value to other people. Do you feel how that's a different intention than the other that's like how do I get views so that things stay relevant? One's a projection and an attachment to outcome and the other is present to the moment and has a more expansive energy to it.

So when I recognize that the most my YouTube channel has ever grown, the most abundance I've ever had come into my life did not come when I was focusing specifically on the thing with resistance. It came when I was good either way. It came when I was focused on the process. It came when I was focusing on enjoying the process and growing but not because I need something from reality. Can you feel the difference in those energies?

So understand that anything we make important we create resistance around. And the key to taking it off of the pedestal has to do with having a more a more neutral way of connecting to things. It has to do with taking the halo effect off of these things. It has to do with seeing it as natural for you to be successful. Seeing it as natural for you to be in a loving relationship or whatever your goals are. You see it as natural. It's not this thing that you need to control because the more you try to control, the more resistance you create.

So let's take this a little bit further, a little bit uh deeper. And now what's really happening is these things that you want, the love, the money, the person's approval, validation, whatever it is, that wanting of it is a way to regulate your nervous system. Think about that for a minute. When you think of certain patterns, certain patterns that might be subconscious like people pleasing, overgiving, even avoidant attachment style or anxious attachment style. These patterns people have on the subconscious. They may not be aware of them or maybe that you are, but what happens is these are ways to regulate the nervous system and these are patterns that have some way of making things important. So, for example, if you're a people pleaser, or here's the thing, you're not a people pleaser, by the way. Don't ever say you're a people pleaser. You have a pattern of people pleasing if that's how you identify yourself, but you are not a people pleaser. Same with overgiver. I'm an overgiver. No, you're not. You learned the pattern of overgiving as a kid because that's who you thought you needed to be to be loved or approved of. But it's not who you are. It's a pattern. It's a desire, a way to regulate your nervous system. It's a way to in a way control reality subconsciously because the belief is that if I give, if I do, then you won't leave me. If I please you, you won't feel tension. And when you don't feel tension, I don't feel tension. So it's a form it's a form or a way of regulating to feel safe in your body.

Now the challenge with this is is that these patterns infuse and project some form of importance on the external. That's what's actually happening. So if you think about it with people pleasing, it's projecting, trying to please someone else, believing that that someone else has the approval for you. They can either disapprove of you or approve of you. It's really important to get that. And that emotion under the surface of not wanting to feel the tension makes it important to not feel tension. Do you see? So it's in the similar way. It's in it's projecting importance onto people in reality. Now think about this with overgiving. Same thing. It's very important that that person doesn't leave. It's very important that that person sees you as a good person. And that importance creates resistance.

So a big part of this is also understanding that what might be happening is if mom and dad who are our authority figures as a kid did not approve of us or validate us in certain ways or meet our needs in certain ways. Who did we have to believe we needed to be in order to be enough? This is this is the key because enough think about what's happening here. If someone is better than you and on a pedestal, project it up. It's they're up here and you might feel down here. You might feel not good enough. So what happens is there's a projection that this person up here if I have their approval and validation then I can feel good enough. Now actually what's happening is everybody in reality is both not good enough and good enough at the same time. It's a concept. This is what a lot of the ancients talked about when we talk about enlightenment. How the idea of enlightenment is a joke because ultimately it's not something you attain. It's something you already are. You are enlightened. You are joy. You are love. You are peace. The only thing that keeps you from the recognition of it is your attachments. It's your attachments and your beliefs. And it's the uh the the energy that's unprocessed in the body. These are all contractive energies that keep you from the understanding that you just exist. That's why they laugh when they become enlightened. Sometimes they say, "Oh, is a funny joke because I've been trying so hard to become this thing I naturally am."

Now, let's use this analogy, too, because I think this will help you really wire in the idea. And simply understanding this idea can completely shift the way that you relate to other people and the way you relate to your inner self. Okay? I've done this at a live events before and it's it so powerfully changes the energy of people's perception. And I'm going to share an idea here with you right now that I think you'll never forget. Imagine at a live event, I bring out three babies. Three baby dolls to be more specific. And imagine there three little cute baby dolls. And what I do is you have to pick your favorite baby doll. One of them you have to cheer for and one of them you have to boo. The other two you have to boo for. So what happens is I had one baby and I said cheer. Whose favorite is number one? And people are like yes. Some people like boo. And it sounds ridiculous. And I made everyone play really hard all out here because it the point is to make it ridiculous to understand how silly this is. So one baby boo yes then put it down then the other one same thing then the other one same thing at the end of the experiment what you realize is that babies have no inherent notworthy or even worthiness in the s like the idea is that babies are worthy because they exist right they this is not a more worthy baby than this baby even if I'm like this baby only cries for 10 minutes a day this baby cries for three hours a day you're like that's a or worthy baby. No, it's silly, right? Babies are worthy cuz they exist.

Now, deeper than this, I think there's actually a deeper layer. Babies just are. They have no concept of worthiness. Am I worthy or not worthy? I feel worthy or worthy. These are concepts. Worthiness is a concept. It doesn't actually have any. When people say I feel worthy, what does that even mean? When people say, "I feel safe." What does that mean? Is safety an emotion? Is worthy an emotion? No, it's you simply are. You're in presence and you might be in a calm regulated nervous system in an acceptance of the moment. And maybe that's what safe is. Safe is you put your guards down and you open, which we'll talk about here in a minute. But understand that the radical perspective that might help you shift to understand this is that babies just are. They exist. They're not better or worse than anyone else. But at a certain point in your past, you may have decided that in order for you to be enough, you have to be a certain way for mom or dad. That's when the projection of importance started. So it became important to get mom's approval or dad's approval. And who did you have to be to get it? A people pleaser, which you're not a people pleaser. Don't you dare think it. You have a people pleasing pattern. You may think thoughts, don't you know, but you're not your thoughts, don't you know? You may have patterns like overgiving, it's not who you are. No, it's not. Uh even avoidant or anxious attachment style, you push away love and connection because you don't want you don't want to get engulfed, right? Right? It becomes very important that person's energy and it becomes important to keep it at bay. Becomes important for anxious to lean in to get their needs met. These are all ways of regulating the nervous system. And what happens is when you realize and come to this awareness that you don't have to fight to be worthy or enough. Why? Because it's just that it's you're playing that game simply because you may have subconsciously been playing it since childhood.

Worthiness is a concept. If you can here's the here's the kicker here. This is what might shift your life more than anything. If you can let it be okay that someone chooses you or not, that's when you'll be free. If you can let it be okay that someone disappoints you or not, that's when you'll be free. If you can let it be okay that someone sees you and you don't fix them, you don't overgive and they may be disappointed or see you as a bad person. If you can let it be okay, you'll be more free. You see, the the opportunity here is in understanding that you've been fighting to control these dynamics because of what you believe it means. And one of the scariest truths about reality, you ready for it? Here's the scariest truth about reality. Nothing nothing has any built-in meaning other than the meaning we give it. Oo, that kind of scary. This is one of the scariest truths of reality, but it's also one of the most empowering things that will free you. Nothing has any built-in meaning other than the meaning we give it. We project meaning onto people. We project meaning onto outcomes. We project I project meaning for a long time onto social media, YouTube. What do people think of me? And I realize there are some people that you project meaning on that if you were to take that meaning back and realize that you're the one doing it. Everything has no built-in meaning. Everything has no built-in meaning. Let me say it again. Everything has no built-in meaning other than the meaning you give it.

So if you're having trouble letting go of an ex that you put on a pedestal, you're projecting meaning onto them. That person and maybe you've had deep experiences. Maybe you have a certain story. That's your meaning generation. You've been the one generating meaning. So this is why it can be so so powerful to understand the pedestal effect because when you take things off a pedestal, you then see it as natural. You're good either way. And part of this is understanding your nervous system. So your nervous system when you put something on a pedestal becomes contracted. Think about it. You're waiting for their text. You meet someone that you really hope is like a certain way and you you make it important. You create resistance and you feel contracted. You feel needy. You're projecting. And what happens is that creates a certain nervous system.

Now I'm going to share with you the answer to this too that will that will really allow you to process this and not just be some spiritual bypass like I'm neutral now. I don't care. Whatever. I'm good either way. Aaron says I'm good either way. Let's let's let's wire this in in a deep way. Right. So, first off, that's how your body might react when you believe the thought. You think thoughts, you're not your thoughts. You have patterns. You're not your patterns. You are not a people pleaser. You are not an over. Don't make me say it again. You have a pattern of it. You may have had a pattern of projecting importance onto other people, but guess what? That is an energy that as you begin to actually embrace the emotions you've been avoiding by projecting, that's when you start to become more free. You want to know why, too? We tend to create in life dynamics that are familiar to us from childhood. Why? Because it's familiar. It's what we know. And we would rather be what we with what we know than what we don't know subconsciously because we don't have to think so much about it. It's just it feels normal. We've normalized it.

So think about what is the if you want someone else's approval or validation or you want a certain outcome, what are the emotions that not having it allows you to feel? You might say, well, I feel shame. I feel guilt. I feel something. I feel lack. Maybe that's the maybe it's serving a purpose by allowing you to feel these emotions underneath the surface. And you see the only thing that allows this thing not to actually process inside of you is that you resist feeling those emotions. You resist what those emotions mean instead of just welcoming it in. This is a shift for many of you. When we try to control, we resist and suppress. Welcome in the sensation. Welcome in the lack. Welcome in and allow that energy to flow through. And what's interesting is when you feel contracted, if you allow yourself to welcome in the sensation of feeling contracted, you allow the energy to move. You try to control the contracted, that's called protection. And protection then becomes the battle of importance. It's the battle of the internal versus the external. The ba the battle of what is and a lack of acceptance or what is.

So the main thing here to understand are these two different energy states of contracted energy and what we are the meaning and thoughts we're giving to certain person situation etc. Looking at the nervous system response which might be contracted or open and normally contracted if we're watching this video and trying to shift around different topics. And then what is your energy? There's a connection between these three things. Okay. And one of the most powerful things to realize is that your nervous system is showing you what you are in projecting importance onto. So how do you actually go from contracted to being open?

Now first off understand that part of this is about becoming aware of what you're putting on a pedestal. Become aware of whatever that is. Become aware that, you know, I did I remember doing this when I was kind of sharing the story of when I started to become more like well-known and I started meeting other creators that have been watching for years. And I I I remember there was like sometimes the first time I met them, there'd be a little bit of this importance energy and then the second time I'd meet them, I'd get to know them a little bit more. And what's interesting is a few of the times when I actually saw they were human, like I actually recognized their flaws in a way. Not in a flaws and like they're less than, but when I saw their flaws, I realized, oh, they're human. They're just like me. They've got flaws just like me. That made it to where it was much it was a much more neutral connection and I was actually able to connect with them in a deep way. And then depth came. Then I was able to connect with people deeper. So, it's interesting how when you start to see it in its full picture, it allows you to take it more off a pedestal.

And what do most people do with the halo effect? They believe that the thing they're going to attract into their life is going to solve all their problems. Or they believe this person is just so amazing as if that person doesn't also have flaws. You can think of the most attractive, amazing, charismatic person you've ever met in your life. And I guarantee as you get to know this person and the more time you're around them, you'll start to see that they also are human. They also go to the bathroom. They also like do they have bodily functions like these are I'm not saying that you just have to project and like but and and like take them off of it by like looking at them negatively. I'm just saying the halo effect is called the halo effect for a reason. And you might have the halo effect around different people, different energies, different outcomes. You start making more money. Like I know Biggie said, more money, more problems. But guess what? With more money and more abundance, there are different levels of stress that can come in. And it kind of helps you realize like, okay, I'll get this thing, but it's not just all going to resolve all all problems you've ever had. Then when you start making more money, guess what's going to happen? People might come to you for money. And then you have to deal with the guilt and the energy of not giving money to people that want it that you care about. There's different challenges that come up. Now, I'm not saying to not go make money and be abundant because of that. I'm saying there are other challenges that will come up. That's a part of life. And when you start to accept that, you become more understanding of the whole process.

So if there's one thing that will really also help you go from contracted to open, there's this understanding that the concepts and it is a concept of like worthiness. I am worthy. It's like if you can accept yourself, if you can accept yourself and understand that as long as you accept you, you don't have to fight for other people's approval or validation, you will then start to see that no one is better than you. No one is worse than you. Everyone just is. And that's really what we're talking about in this video. When we talk about making it natural, I'm talking about bringing it into presence. Bringing it into presence. Becoming more present. And when you are more present, guess what happens? When you are more present to the moment, you're more accepting of the moment. You can allow these sensations to come up. You can start self-reflecting on what is the pattern here. Remember, don't make me say it. Peopleleasing pattern, overgiving pattern, anxious pattern, avoidant pattern. These are patterns. And as you become aware of what is the energy underneath the surface you can feel and be present with that's when the energy begins to move through instead of using a protective mechanism which creates importance and resistance.

So the key to this is the value and the power of neutrality. It's the truth of reality. Everything everything has no built-in meaning other than the meaning you give it. Anything that you see you can give a different diff people have different associations and meanings depending on their stories about things. I can give myself a story and say this pen right here is is just a pen. It's a neutral pen, right? But you want to know the story? You want to know the truth? This pen comes from Italy. It was shipped with this whiteboard. This whiteboard itself was like a $1,500 whiteboard cuz it's called the big whiteboard. And guess what? Ultimately, it was this this thing that I got cuz I love making these whiteboard videos, right? But then when someone starts hearing the story, oh my gosh, it was shipped from Italy. These these pens are like 150 bucks for like four of them. Ain't that crazy? More meaning, more importance. Then I say, just kidding. This is a $25 board from Amazon. Doesn't freaking matter. But really that we don't have to deny and like downplay it. It just is. It just is. It's just neutral. The meaning is neutral. Right. My my grandma gave me this pen. And right before something happened, she told me this very important thing about life. And this pen I've had in my family generation for this many generations. And she gave me this pen. And now I keep it with me everywhere I go. Now it's got a lot more meaning, right? Because of the story. This story. Got it for $25 on Amazon or I got it for$undred $1,500 from Italy. I actually got from Italy for like 1,500 bucks, just so you know. So, it's partially true what I'm saying. Um, but do you see how the story changes how you relate to it or not? Because you watch this video, right? And you're like, nothing's better or worse than others. This is the story that we tell ourselves. And ultimately, this is why some people can bring in an incredible amount of wealth and they don't sabotage it and throw it away because wealth and money is a neutral thing. It's your importance that allows you to keep it or not. It's your importance around a relationship around whether it's natural for you or not. And you're in a calm, open, regulated nervous system.

So, do you see how now self-sabotage, we can make a whole other video on self-sabotage with importance. So, if you want me to make a video on self-sabotage and how to transform around importance, comment below and let me know. But that could be a whole other video. But understand that in general, the flip is this. And the key is this. The recognition of neutrality. Observing your thoughts. You think thoughts, you're not your thoughts. You give things meaning. Understanding that you can become aware of the pedestal. You can become aware of what you're projecting and what the pattern is. Then secondly, what you do is you identify the pattern and you feel the emotion underneath the surface. Welcome it in. That's the key to letting the energy move. And then you feel and question it. You can feel and self- inquire about it. Who would you be without making other people really important? How do you respond when you believe they're important? When you believe they have something you don't have inside of yourself? This is where you begin to create separation between thinking thoughts and believing you are your thoughts. And this is something that when you begin to do on the outside and recognize what your set point is, your set point is what controls what's equal to your reality. You have a set point for love. You have a set point for abundance. You have a set point for your kind of relationships. And this set point you will always try to default back to. So this is why I think it is so important to become aware of what your energetic set point is.

So something else that I have if you want to go through this process by the way you can join my membership. It's called the shift academy. I will show you step by step how to transform this energy inside of you. How to make things be more neutral to understand where you project meaning. But really, it's a process for letting go and moving from contraction to open in different areas of your life. That's what we focus on. And if you do want to join, I'll go ahead and link it below. You can join. And every month, we go over a pattern of the month. And what we do is we transform that pattern. And we embrace a new version of ourselves with consistency. And that's the thing that people normally fall back into old patterns with is they're not consistent. They don't show up and they're not wiring in this new version of the self through this kind of awareness. So that's something you could do below. And if you want to also raise what is called your dominant vibration, that's another way to connect to your set point. I have a meditation with over 2 million views on YouTube. Do this meditation for 21 days. Watch how much your life changes as you elevate your energy and let go of what's no longer you. So watch that video for 21 days and watch what happens.