Transcription
What's up, guys? Welcome back to Pearl Media. In today's episode, we'll be reacting to another Kevin Samuels video. Let's get into it.
"It's not a solution for young people."
"Hello."
"Hi."
"Traditional relationships are always going to be better off the younger you are."
"Hello."
"Hi."
"How are you?"
"Good. How are you doing?"
"Good. How old are you?"
"I'm 36."
"All right. So, we're talking about living apart together or if you have a question about anything, what do you want? What are we talking about today?"
"Well, I guess I can touch on living together. Um, I totally agree with with what you're saying, especially with..."
"...living apart together."
"Yes."
"Okay. Go ahead."
"And I guess I would say I totally agree with you and the reason why I feel I totally agree with you is because you're right um with with with the way the world is changing, people's tolerance, people's tolerance is way shorter nowadays. But like you say, they still want to it's like get away from me. But please love me. You know what I'm saying?"
"That's real."
"Um, you're getting on my nerves today, but once my attitude changes, let's go eat. You know, uh, so I don't know if that's bipolar or just moodiness or whatever it is, but we can just I I blame I blame history. It's been stolen from us. So, we take on these identities and these different characters that we see on TV and no one is really themselves anymore."
"I I think I think more than anything else, we just have too much information. We're too overloaded."
"I mean..."
"...the wrong information."
"Yes."
"Wrong. Right. The subconscious brain does not The subconscious brain doesn't distinguish between good, bad, right, or wrong. It's all information. And this is not a solution for everyone. But just like you said, how many times do you hear people talk about they're in a relationship, they can't stand the person when then they're away from the person, they want to be around them. We people today across the board don't want to be in each other's space like our grandparents did. So I don't..."
"The more I start to think about it, the more I started to think this is go then this is understand something people this is a trend worldwide."
"Mhm."
"It's It's becoming a trend worldwide, so we might as well start talking about it."
"Yeah."
"Do you have any children?"
"No, I don't."
"Okay. Um..."
"I I mean, I've raised my sister. I don't know if that counts."
"No. No. No. Do you uh do you want do you want a to be married one day?"
"I would like to be married one day. Yes. I would like to find a distinguished gentleman and become married. Would you pref would you prefer to live together or would you prefer to live would you prefer a traditional setup or something different?"
"I I I want a traditional man. I will I would love for God to bless me with the traditional man. The..."
"...with the old old antique heart, you know, not..."
"...well now you know my views are very you know me I'm a Christian but I believe that marriage is a natural choice. God blesses us with the 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. What you doing to make sure you around these men and the kind of men that's going to pick you if he came into your presence, that's more important."
"Okay. I'm glad you answered that because I I've been lately I'm going to start with the appearance. Um, right now I just got my real estate license. Um, I'm trying to build my little real estate business."
"Traditional men don't care about business."
"No, no, no. That's not what I'm That's not my point for saying that. My point for saying is I've been neglecting my appearance."
"Mhm."
"So that I can won't look I will say won't look homeless or ghetto or whatever whatever the classifications people want to put on women nowadays. I have not presented myself..."
"...uh with my appearance to get out there..."
"...and meet that type of man."
"Okay. Uh well then you ain't going to attract him."
"Exactly. And so I I want to get there. I I can honestly say I'm not You see me now? Nothing."
"But But at 36 years old, were you raised as a mother and father and household?"
"I will honestly have to say they were a young in love couple, but it turned uh toxic."
"Okay."
"So at 36 years old, you know, men are visual."
"Yes. Uh..."
"...why not why why just now start to worry about your appearance? on the downside to 40."
"Now I have to now now let me now let me answer that as well. I just to make a long story short, I was voted um in class of 02. I graduated class 02. I was voted most conceited. So I used to be very into the heels and the nails and and I you and I've and I've attracted a few millionaires in my 20s coming up cuz that was very important to me once upon a time. But then as I wanted to learn myself and I got I wanted to dig deep and learn not to be shallow, learn how to be humble, learn how to put God first, learn not to just give my body to a man just cuz he say he love me. Uh let people prove you know that their intentions is you know all of that you know I um I lost the way of the uh..."
"Sound like you just lazy to me. I'm getting I have been..."
"Yeah, cuz all that about cuz that was a nice way of saying that I attracted a millionaire. That that don't take nothing except having an ass and some titties. That's all that take to attract a millionaire to attract a man in your 20s if you're physically appealing is no different than attracting a man on fries at McDonald's. But I'm trying to understand why so many of our black women feel like walking around with bonnets and flip-flops and house shoes and and not being physically appealing is the thing to do. It's like it's like in our community, it's like a badge of honor to be busted cuz I'm deep and I'm not I'm not let no man take a bench. That don't sound like nothing to be proud of. and and that's and and I and I stated all that to say I'm coming out of that. So I I'm one thing about me, I am a woman to the fullest, meaning I can be I can be I can admit when I'm wrong and I can take uh..."
"Well, the reason I reason I'm direct because you're 36 years old. You you you have no little you have no time."
"I have no time. You're right. So I'm..."
"So So the magic So like how tall are you?"
"Um I'm I'm just..."
"No, no, no, no, no. Don't don't show. No, no, we don't have to do all that. Hold the camera right there. I'm doing..."
"Yeah, you're doing too much now. Hold on. You're doing Hold on. Hold on. You're making You're making the camera go crazy. You're doing too much. Just..."
"chill out."
"Yeah. Um competition is stiff. Men are visual. You talking about you want an old school man, a traditional man, and you want kids?"
"Yeah."
"How many kids do you want?"
"I want two. A girl and a boy. You can't pick those. You can only pick the quantity."
"Um, then do you want to have to work to pay significant bills after you're pregnant?"
"Well, that's the thing. I got my real estate license, so I don't..."
"Yes or no?"
"I plan to help, if I'm answering the question correctly."
"work to pay significant bills, meaning if you don't work, the family's still fine."
"Yes."
"So, you do want to have to work to make sure the family's okay. Or you don't want to have to work."
"Yes. I want to I want to build enough assets. Generational what? Wealth is my goal."
"We can't be generational wealth. I mean, we we just got to we got to pay the rent first. We got Black women talk a lot of this [ __ ] 9% of y'all make over $75,000 a year."
"Well, I got real estate deeds. So, make..."
"I don't I don't care if you got real estate deeds. I mean, you can. That's paperwork. Do you have Do you have it? You have the money in the bank account and the paychecks and the commission checks to support anything? I'm working on that..."
"...and then that's a no. So, see far too many of our women talk and I wanted to build generational wealth. You can't build generational wealth as an individual. You need a husband and you need multiple things going on. But before that, you got to get a man. And what I'm asking is how are you going to attract that man if if you got your real estate license in the last 10 20 10 15 years you've just been doing something else at 36 years old when the competition is stiff and according to you you do want to what percentage of the here's a question what percentage of the overall family financial load do you want to have to be responsible for for a lifetime out of 100%. What percent do you want to have to be responsible for for a lifetime?"
"Honestly, I want my husband to do all of that if if I'm just being honest."
"Okay. So, you want to be responsible for 0%."
"I want to I want to I want to be responsible for when my husband needs..."
"Uhhuh. Uhuh."
"Uhhuh. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. See, at 36,..."
"okay,"
"...you should be able to answer these questions. I'm asking you, do you want to have to work to pay significant bills after you're pregnant with your first child? And you say, "I want to help." Uhuh. What percentage of the overall family financial load do you want to have to be responsible for for your generational wealth you're talking about building? What?"
"All of it. All of it. Just..."
"Okay. Okay. You're missing the question. All of it means you're providing 100%."
"Out of 100%. Out of 100% of the mortgage, the retirement, the car, the college loans, the trips, the vacations, everything, what percentage of that whole number for a lifetime do you want to have to be responsible for?"
"50."
"Okay, that means if you don't work, the family is in jeopardy. Okay. I'm not I'm going to answer this question wrong because I guess I'm honestly not getting the question the way I need to."
"Yeah. Well, the the question is you say you want your husband to be responsible for all the the money and then in the next breath you want to be responsible for 50%. How about this? Let me ask you right now. If you never married, right?"
"Never been married."
"If No, no, no. If you never get married in your lifetime, right?"
"Okay, there we go. What what percentage of your f your financial load are you going to have to carry?"
"All of it."
"Right. So, if you get married, what percentage of the family financial load do you want to have to carry?"
"All of it. I don't know. I'm slow. I'm slow, Kevin. I'm sorry. I'm I don't That's a trick question."
"It's not a trick question, ma'am. It's math. If you work, you got to pay all your bills."
"Yes. if it's just me by myself."
"But if you're married, do you want your So that's a husband. You want to be responsible for all of it means you're responsible for what you need, what he needs, and what all the kids and the pets and everybody need. That means..."
"No, I don't want that. If I get married, I want my husband to bear most of the bearing."
"What's most of what's most of..."
"80%."
"Okay. And see, this is the problem. I'm this. Why is this so painful? Because ma'am, you're over almost 40 years old. And no disrespect."
"Okay."
"You haven't even thought about a financial structure. It's like y'all just walk around through life and expecting [ __ ] to just happen when it comes to men."
"So listen."
"Okay."
"No, no. I gave you pl I g I I I gave the basic two plus two was four question so many different ways. And the reality is y'all don't think about this stuff. Y'all just cuz see what you really think is when I get married, I want to attract a man and he going to take care of it all. So I ain't got to think about it. I can live what I'm doing right now and and later on. So whatever I got as far as debt, student loan debt, credit card debt, my man should he's supposed to come in and build and most men don't make that kind of money."
"Can I chime in my perspective..."
"...cuz I don't want to get booed. I don't want to get ahead. Get kicked up. Go ahead. Go ahead. Go ahead. Okay. All I perspective to all of that is just this uh Mr. Samuels because I've been doing it for so long. My brain is me me. I'm even though what you're about to say doesn't matter. It's all paperwork. But in my brain from trying to just build or have a lifestyle or or whatever, it's been me me. So then why so so then so when you get a husband..."
"So if I get a husband..."
"Uhhuh."
"...If I get a husband I honestly do not expect him to do everything what I want."
"But you want him to do but but hold on. But you want him to do 80% of it. So that means listen that means you go from having to do 100% to take care of you to only having to do 20% to take care of you and some kids and a man. That's a hell of a deal."
"Yeah. Yeah."
"So, so what kind of men make the kind of money to be able to take on a wife and have two children to where she's only going to have to provide at best 20%."
"That 1% of men to high a small a small pool."
"Uhhuh. Right. And what and and due respect, ma'am, do you think you can secure one of those?"
"Uh, I have I I feel I can. Yes. Yes."
"36 years."
"Yes, I feel I can."
"Okay. This is where the ranking stuff start coming in."
"Dress size..."
"...at this present moment with the braids and everything."
"No, no. Dress D dress size."
"Oh, I'm small. I'm I'm like a size seven. Seven."
"How tall are you?"
"56."
"How much you weigh last time you weighed yourself?"
"I weigh 158. And on a scale from 0 to 10 and 1 to 10, you can't use seven. Straight out of the shower, your hair, no makeup. What do you rank yourself?"
"10. No makeup. 10. 10. 10. It's just I guess it's just my confidence. 10."
"Take that confidence to a bank account with zero money and see how confident the ATM give you any money out. I'm not just to try to Yeah,..."
"ma'am, I mean, I'm trying to have a conversation with you, man. When you do when y'all do [ __ ] like this, then it starts making me want to start act a fool. You really think you're 10?"
"I don't care. I don't care what you feel."
"I feel like I don't I'm not going to say nothing less. I don't You asked me a question."
"This is And this is And this is why you'll be This is why women like you die alone. You can feel like you a 10, but ma'am, you're not a 10. A 10 means your supermodel looks."
"Well, I mean, it's like women in general, black women in particular, feel like I'mma tell I'm going to say I'm a 10 no matter what."
"But I don't feel it's just I don't feel in looks though. I don't feel as..."
"Well, that's the problem. But see, that's the problem though. See, how do we get here? You're 36 years old and you ain't worried about your looks."
"That's true."
"And that's why Well, there you go. So you obviously don't understand what it takes to get the kind of man you're talking about. That's why 100% that's why you got such a single woman's mindset cuz the way you're setting yourself up thinking about I'm only having to do for me me and not worry about how I look and carry myself and then thinking that I'm 36 years old you can just turn around and then I'm I'm a 10 and I'm going to get a man pay 80% of the that ain't how that work."
"Well that's why I wanted to get on this call so I can be set straight. I want I'm standing up straight, man. I mean, okay, but see, you want to hear it, but what I'm not getting is a realistic answer."
"Do you really think that if I put you next to Beyonce, Kelly Roland, and Rihanna, you in that line of women?"
"As far as looks,..."
"...I've been in the same room with them."
"I don't care about being in the same room with you, man."
"As far as as far as physical,..."
"...that's what I'm talking about."
"That's But that's the question I asked you. I thought you just said how do do I feel I'm a 10?"
"No, I said what do you rank? What do you rank your looks?"
"I thought you said what do I rank myself?"
"Okay. No."
"Okay."
"It's the same qu if you watch me. It's the same question."
"Okay. As far as..."
"yellow. Yes. So your face one to 10. You cannot use seven. Fresh face no makeup right out of the shower."
"Six. That's Come on now. Come on now. I'm not Come on now. Give me something now. Uh, Mr."
"I'm just I'm not saying we've already gone beyond. And see, the thing is, one of the problems that I find with many modern women is you guys lack self-awareness and humility. I mean, it's just y'all are just like the y'all are the [ __ ]..."
"See, that's what See, that's what I was afraid of. And I and I wanted to put a disclaimer out before you connected with me because I pray every day that I work on my attitude, that I work on how I'm being perceived. Um, I try not to talk as much when I'm out in public. I try to ask questions and just not waste too much air and too much breath. So, I'm I'm I feel I'm very aware of how I act and how others perceive me. And I don't I trust me I I pray up and down that I do not be..."
"pray. You pray God ain't got nothing. Okay. Okay. But if you want to be married."
"Okay."
"And you know men are visual."
"Yes. I know they're visual. Maybe this. Maybe this."
"No. No. No. I need you to listen. I need you to listen."
"Okay. I'm listening."
"You You're praying that a man accepts you the way you are."
"Okay. That might be true. You're right. That means that means that means the kind of man you want would have to settle."
"Oo. Okay."
"I mean,..."
"I'm listen..."
"I'm listening to a woman that says I I I've been in this room. I've been in this room. When I was in my 20s, when I looked a certain way, I got this. But last 16 years, it's just been whatever."
"No. No. Like two two years. Two years I've been under construction. Two years I've been under construction. I've been single for two years. I've been under construction."
"How long was your last relationship?"
"Seven years."
"Why did you guys get married?"
"He wanted to marry me. I don't I wasn't in love with him. I was not in love with him."
"So, you spent seven years with somebody that..."
"I I found out some things about him..."
"...in year one or year seven?"
"In year seven."
"Then you That makes no sense. No matter how you slice it. That makes no sense. And was he a millionaire?"
"He was he he I'm not going to say he was a millionaire, but I've seen when he was a general contractor, the business was making millions. The business was making millions."
"The business ain't okay. But that doesn't mean Okay."
"That's all I'm saying."
"So you don't So So this man wanted to marry you,..."
"...but I felt he was a homosexual. That's why I on the low. That's why I didn't want to I didn't want to sleep with him. I and I..."
"This is your boyfriend, right?"
"This was my boyfriend. And in year seven, I suspected homosexuality and I didn't want to deal with it."
"Oh Lord Jesus, emerald star. You are go. You are outside of your ever loving mind."
"I'm just telling you. Ask me."
"Year seven. Year seven. So year 1 through six."
"There was some time apart."
"Holy Jesus. Holy Jesus. Holy Jesus."
"Holy Jesus. Hold Jesus."
"I'm just telling you I'm..."
"No, man. No. No. I know. I know. I know. You're dead serious."
"Honest."
"But the thing is what I'm asking."
"You saying why?"
"Why would you be with somebody for seven years? I don't care about you. You start suspecting uh homosexual vibes in year seven. So what about year one when most people decide that you you call him your boyfriend?"
"Okay. Okay. And year..."
"...he wanted to marry you."
"Okay, let me be honest. In year one, it was in year one, it was more of a employer employee. When I first met him, I was the employee. It started off."
"Ma'am, you said he was your boyfriend for seven years."
"We dated in that first year after I stopped working for him. We did start dating. That first year I met him. Yes. When I stopped working for the company, only worked for the company for a few months."
"I don't care about the work, ma'am. I care about You said you were in a very relationship for seven years. Well, maybe I'm getting the word relationship. Maybe my view of relationship and your view of relationship is off because it wasn't..."
"I asked you if it was your boyfriend."
"Yes, it was my boyfriend."
"Was it a monogous committed relationship?"
"It was not a committed relationship."
"And it's not a..."
"It was not committed. It was not committed."
"And I say that because he was cheating. He was doing what he was doing. It wasn't a perfect..."
"It was I don't I don't get it, Mr. S. Can I just say this? We all relationships aren't perfect."
"No, ma'am. No, I don't need to hear any psycho babble [ __ ]"
"Okay."
"Did you claim this man is your boyfriend?"
"I did."
"And did he claim you as his girlfriend?"
"He..."
"That's a yes or no."
"No. No."
"So, how are you in a relationship? I was I was..."
"No, no, no, no, no, no. Not sort of. See, when a relationship happens, there's a conversation. You, my lady, I'm your man. We ain't seeing nobody else. You don't just go around as a grown ass person for seven years without a conversation."
"So, I guess our relationship was I couldn't see anyone else, but I but I never caught him doing anything."
"Ain't nobody could you c No."
"Okay."
"Did y'all have a conversation to where y'all were supposed to be the couple?"
"Yes, I we lived together. Yes, we were a couple. We did live together."
"Oh [ __ ]"
"We did live together. Yes."
"Living that that together but separate."
"How long you been in therapy?"
"Hm."
"How long you been in therapy?"
"I've never been in therapy."
"You need to go tomorrow."
"I need to go tomorrow."
"Oh, yes."
"But I'm I'm aware of all my flaws."
"No, no, no, no, no, no. Ma'am, you can't even make You can't even make this conversation make sense..."
"...cuz the relationship didn't make sense."
"No, no. You live with somebody. See, the way you're trying to talk the story is in once in one half of a sentence, he's your boyfriend. In another half, we're not really in a committed situation. But you live with the [ __ ]"
"Yes."
"No, ma'am. No. No. You..."
"I'm listening. And this is the mind you're taking out into the marketplace. Talk about I'm a 10 and I want somebody to pay 80% of the bills for me and my two kids through life. That's that's what I that's what I put myself in. Yes. Because the and I don't and it wasn't for love. It was for money for me on my end. So yes, I'm being just putting it out for money. for money. Cuz see, when I ask you why you in it for seven years, the first thing that comes out of most of you women's mouth is a reason to why you're not accountable. It was either abuse, adultery, some sort of toxic or undercover gay. Y'all never just say, you know what, I [ __ ] up and chose some chose poorly and I and I didn't get a formal relationship so I don't get any formal recognition. I just wasted seven years of my life and I was dumb for doing that. You'll always blame the man. No, I'm not trying to Did I try to blame him?"
"You What' you say? I said, "Why?" I said, I said, "How when was your last relationship?" Two years ago. How long it last? Seven years. Why didn't y'all get married? He wanted to marry me. So, that means he did his part. But I didn't want to marry him."
"Here comes the stop. Here comes the excuse. Cuz I suspected homosexual tendencies. And I said in year 1 or year seven. In year seven. So that meant your zero through six was no [ __ ] problem. And if he wanted to marry you, you should have married him if this was a relationship. But in order to not be a fault, you got to somehow blame him in year seven so he can wash hands of year one through seven."
"Okay."
"Same [ __ ] all the time. I know. I know."
"That's why that's why people tune in. I know."
"And that's why No. No. But that's why people tune in. It don't matter you why you loved it. You didn't love him, but you live with him."
"Did he pay your bills?"
"The money. I was I was in I was..."
"Did he pay bills? I met him."
"Did he pay your bills?"
"Yeah."
"Okay. Well, okay. He didn't paid your bills. You didn't love him? Fine. He didn't get any commitment out of him. Fine. I just asked most women, non-black women, would not live with nobody for that long. They going to y'all. It's like black women feel like marriage is such a big [ __ ] deal. Y'all have babies and live with somebody and deal with somebody, but you won't marry them. Now, now, now today, my attitude today. Now, that was the young minded attitude that I just discussed with you because I was young minded when I was in that situation. Now, the mature of me, the mature side of me, I've been Don't Don't cuss me out. I've been..."
"Okay, I'm just saying don't don't be Well, okay. Cuz I know you going to go there. I know you going to go. I've been just trying to get to learn me. I haven't been dating."
"Uhhuh. How long How long you been doing this? I've been doing this for like three years now."
"And you haven't had therapy, but you're doing this on your own. That's what I mean."
"I wouldn't say I'm doing it on my own because I I have a lot of faith. I have..."
"Exactly. Thank you. I was about to even take it out of my words. You cannot make this [ __ ] up, people. Black women have anaphylactic shock when it comes to marriage. And then they are the they have a best counsel because they got Jesus. You cannot make this faith, God, whatever. You ain't doing the real work. So me trying to work on I'm I'm listening. I'm not debating nothing you're saying cuz I You're the one that drove the relationship. You're the one that stayed in a relationship. You made it was your best thinking that got you where you are right now."
"Like I said, I was young minded in that whole situation and in that class."
"You're not listening."
"Yes."
"Three years of you trying to fix you."
"Yes. Trying. says you're qualified to fix you."
"Okay, I can take that."
"Who says you're qualified to fix you? This is why we need therapy because we always think I got faith and God going to do it and God got God ain't got nothing to do with this. The only thing that's happening is you're wasting time. The reality is after this conversation is over, you're a 36 year old woman with no marital prospects. trying to reinvent the wheel. I don't know if it's too late."
"I'm just saying that's the hardcore reality. A 36 year old woman with no marital prospects and from what you're saying, no real relationship history of cooperating successfully with a man in anything other than a transactionary kind of relationship."
"And yes, I am. Yes. 10,000. Why in the in hell would somebody who has the resources to provide for a wife to the tune of taking care of 80 plus% of the bills want that little in return?"
"But but like I'm trying to state that was my old thinking. I don't think like that today. I don't..."
"I'm talking to ma'am I'm talking to the same look. You seem to think that that was then. I'm telling you what I'm hearing today. But I you but we're answering questions."
"Yes, ma'am. And you still have the same mindset because somebody who doesn't have the mindset will take accountability."
"So..."
"accountability and the first when I asked you ma'am a very simple question. Do you want to have to work to pay significant bills after you're pregnant? No. I want my husband to pay for all this. What percentage of the over overall family financial load? Whether you're good at math or anything is irrelevant. The bottom line is that question is designed to get you to say truthfully that uh I don't really want to have to be responsible for thing financially. I want the man to be responsible for it. That's fine. Men that have to do that's fine. Men that have to provide at that level have to make themselves that something. And what are they going to get? What is a man who could provide for a a a wife and two kids to the tune where she only has to kick in 20%. That's an above average man. Like you said, top 1%. What is..."
"Now, as far as Now, as far as me trying to work on myself and answer your question, what will the man get? I'm glad you asked that. I feel in return, a man will get now, please don't hurt me for saying the wrong [ __ ]..."
"But I get for me in return,..."
"...loyalty, honesty, um, what else? encouragement, support, um fun, um uh knowledge. I'm I think I know a little something about a little something. So, I would try to uh share my perspective on different subjects that are important in life. Um I know about investing, you know, I would just try to pour all..."
"So, what about investing? Investing in what?"
"Real estate, land. I buy a lot of vacant lots, uh cryptocurrency, stuff like that. Um, and I do do that every day. I'm not just like, cuz..."
"Let me stop let me stop you right there."
"Okay."
"Everything you said,..."
"...is that what those men want?"
"Well, I would think every man would want someone that's supportive and positive first and foremost. The the No. Okay. I'm not here to argue in debate. I'm just here to..."
"I'm just just I just part of the problem. No. No. because the stuff you just ran down."
"That's what I want."
"Thank you. Thank you. That's the problem. You all y'all think that we're like you and we're not like you."
"Okay. That's what I want."
"Well, I mean, at this point, man, I mean, if you How long you been watching my channel, my content?"
"That's recent. I just start seeing you um cutting people off left and right and and I just like I want to I want to get set straight and see what I what it is. And I feel you over this. Can I ask you how long you been watching my content?"
"For like a week or two. I just bumped into your page."
"Okay. Well, I would say I would say this that you given us you give a lot of you don't seem to have any idea what men want."
"You're probably right. You're right."
"Well, I'm probably right. I mean, first thing you said, you stop worrying about your looks and stop you didn't care about that cuz you wanted to focus on you and becoming you. You became an ind. You've made yourself into a modern independent woman. That's fine. But that ain't what that ain't what the kind of men you talk about want."
"So help me. What do I..."
"I've already helped you and I've already spoken enough. I've already helped enough."
"Um anything men want from women is cooperation. And um and there's some and you know feminine friendly cooperative dismissive. If you don't really care about your appearance, I mean, where's your level of femininity at?"
"Yeah, I do care. I just been neglecting."
"But that's No, no, no, no, no. That's not neglect. That'd be like saying a man saying he neglects his masculinity. That's stupid."
"Okay, you're right. You're absolutely right."
"No, what you what you're doing is, you're becoming a you're preparing to be alone."
"Well, I don't want to be alone."
"Well, I mean,..."
"...so men want cooperation. I need to be more softer, more feminine. Okay, I hear you. I'm taking more than that."
"I mean, y'all don't all seem to even understand the kind of men you want. I'm like, at the end of the day, you want a traditional provider male."
"And at the end of the day, I want a gentleman. I want a gentle man. I don't want..."
"I'm listening to what you said, man."
"I just want a gentleman. What's wrong with my child? You want you want it all. You You want You want the creme de la creme of me. You want a man that is an infantestimal. You want a man who has the money and resources to provide for 80 plus%. And you want him to be a gentleman in this and this and that. I got one question. Are men like that exceedingly rare? You've already said they're top 1% of men, right?"
"Yes. Stop."
"Stop."
"Okay. I'm listening."
"Hard direct question. You ready?"
"Yes. [ __ ]"
"Are you a top 1% woman?"
"No."
"Thank you."
"Then you can't have it."
"Can I work to get there?"
"Nope."
"It's too late for me."
"Uh again, you going to put another 5 10 years in it. Now that time you 35, you have 41 46. Those men tend to also want children. See, the problem is women like yourself all want the same. You want the fantasy..."
"...and y'all aren't and y'all aren't fantasies."
"Okay. Okay."
"Y'all are average women walking around wanting fantasy men."
"Okay. Now, when you say average, when you say average, because because..."
"when I say average, when I say average, I'll tell you exactly what I mean by average. Did you graduate from college?"
"Uh, from my vocational training, real estate."
"No, no. High school. got diploma. Yes."
"Did you get a bachelor's in college?"
"I don't have a degree."
"Okay. So, all right. Whether you did or did not, but that's just Okay. Average looks."
"So, stop. Looks, physique, sexual, marketplace, value. When I asked you, where do you rank yourself? You said you're 10. I would give you a five."
"Okay."
"That makes you average."
"Okay. Average people get average people."
"Okay."
"But you want and you want an exceptional person..."
"...because I've had that. I've had that. I guess..."
"...you haven't had. Have you? You've had you. What do you mean you said you had that? The last person..."
"...cuz you about to say I've never been married. So you're right."
"No, no, no. I'm going to say who who is who is the person you've had? The last relationship was this person."
"If he was that then you would have married him. Okay. Okay. All right."
"See, this is why this conversation is probably going to go viral because women like you think because you can deal with men like this, because you can go on a date with them or have sex with them, that that becomes your new normal. No, those men don't marry average women."
"Okay? They may kick it with you, and I'm trying to be polite, but no different than if an average man hooked up with Beyonce, Kelly Roland, or Rihanna. That average dude would all of a sudden start thinking that that's my new level. He'd say, "Uh, I I got lucky that one time." But women start looking at the highest level man they can deal with and think that's what they qualify for."
"Okay. Now, can I Now, now in my defense, I see you rolling your eyes. In my in my defense, Mr. Samuels, I'm not of course I want a man to be able to provide, but I want to be realistic. I don't expect..."
"Could you marry a man making 40? Could you Could you marry a man making $21 an hour?"
"Yes."
"For a lifetime?"
"Yes. Yes."
"That's all he's going to make."
"My No, listen. That's all he's going to make for a lifetime. Not more, not less. Yes."
"Okay. So then why then why and you would marry this person..."
"...based off how if he treats me well? Yes. Yes."
"What do you mean treat you well? He's going to treat you like a man treat you going treat you decent."
"Well all men don't treat all women."
"He's going to treat you decent. He's going to treat I mean he's not going to pedalize you. Going to just treat you like a woman."
"He's not going to uh you know lick my toes or nothing. But..."
"I didn't say that. I said he's going to treat you average. Normal. What's that? Can you break down that word average? As far as treatment as far as the treatment."
"Yes. Uh he'll come home."
"Okay."
"He'll put his money in to pay for the bills."
"Okay."
"He won't put his hands on you."
"Okay."
"Won't be rude to you."
"Okay. I'm listening."
"That's about it."
"That's it. Okay."
"Yeah. Okay. So, I think so. Yeah, you're right. I'm living in a fantasy world."
"Yeah. Yeah. Y'all cuz y'all think y'all should get these [ __ ] OJ OJ's whispers and singing coming home and bringing you flowers. And y'all average just like you going to get average male come do everything. He going go he going to go do third shift at the plant going to come home."
"Okay. Now what if Now what if and then and now now I'm just pulling your leg. Now, what if like right now I look average, right? But I know I I know I look way better than this when I get cleaned up."
"Get on. Get on. Get on. Okay."
"So, what if I turn into an eight?"
"You can't."
"Okay."
"Can't. You're..."
"okay?"
"And even if you did that, it wouldn't matter. You can't stay an eight. If you could turn into an eight. Let me help you out. Let me give you a little Thanos. Ready? Okay."
"You're an eight. Cinderella. Didn't say Cinderella."
"No."
"You are what you are."
"Okay."
"You're a high school graduate."
"Yes, I am a high school graduate. I went to some college. I didn't I didn't get..."
"That's okay. So, you're a high school graduate."
"Real estate agent."
"You're not a badl looking woman. You're not That's fine. Who cares? You're not a badl looking woman. You're not beautiful woman. You're an average looking woman. You're in Hold the camera. You're in You're in all right shape. I mean, it's just not like you going to be an Instagram model, but you're not..."
"Well, all the Instagram models trying to get this look now. They want to wear no makeup and no lashes. They want to be natural now. I'm just putting that out there."
"Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Ain't no Instagram model trying to be you."
"I'm telling you, they on there trying to..."
"No, they ain't trying to be you. They're not trying to do that. But the fact of the matter is, when was the last time when a man like that approached you, you're honestly saying that I asked you, could you marry a man like that..."
"...making $41,000 a year? Yes."
"He's just All right. And then would you be feminine? Would you be feminine, fit, friendly, cooperative, and submissive to him?"
"That's why I'm on this call. Cuz..."
"...that's a yes or no."
"I'm I will I attain to be that. Okay. So, so the answer is today you can't. No, no. You you you didn't say yes. You say I you trying to be that. But no, that's not I'm asking you."
"Can I just chime in because I'm going off what you're saying."
"No, ma'am. Ma'am, are you a submissive woman in a relationship?"
"I have not been in the past."
"Then that's the point. So this is why I can say guys can cross the border illegally into me from Mexico, stand out in front of Home Depot, collect cans, and they still can go home to a submissive, respectful woman. I'm asking you as a woman who would arguably be average, could you deal with an average man and be cooperative and submissive? And the bottom line is no."
"Yes. In the past, Mr. You got you can. Okay. in the past. Terrible. But but but man, that was But when was your last relationship you've had?"
"I just told you years ago."
"Two two years ago. Three years."
"Right. And you and you ain't had a man since."
"No."
"So you can't tell me what you'd be tomorrow cuz you ain't had no man."
"Okay."
"This is theory."
"Okay."
"Prior performance is the best predictor of future performance."
"Okay. Now, the whole me trying to take some time out to get to know me and and work on my submiss. You'll be you'll be that you be you're you are the same person that got you in a previous situation. That's like somebody saying, "hm, I cooked the I cooked the shitty meal. I cooked the meal that wasn't that good. So, I'm going to go in here and practice cooking, but I'm not going to read a recipe. I'm just going to toy with it." But see, you thought your cooking was already good enough. So if you just go cook some more, you don't know until you serve it to somebody. You you've been in charge of this process yourself, man."
"Now, what if I'm trying to admit that I know it was [ __ ] up in the past and..."
"Yeah, but it's your taste buds is off. That's the problem. It don't matter. You your taste buds is off."
"Okay. Okay."
"My the fact of the matter is, ma'am, if if you really if you could do that, we attract what we are. Okay. And if and if you were you may have be more aware of the things that went wrong in your previous relationship. Yes."
"But until you actually get involved with somebody, you ain't going to know how you act. And all we know is who you been. And the person I'm talking to, more likely or not, you're going to just be a a a derivative of what you were before."
"We don't make wholesale changes."
"I'm sorry. And I I'm just just trying to say I'm glad you said that because I just told myself out of everything I've been learning, how are you going to apply that? I talk I have talks with myself. How will I apply that when a new situation that is presented a a nice uh candidate, a nice potential?"
So if this was a man, they will call him an incel or socially awkward or something like that. Having conversations with yourself when people used to do that, they used to call him crazy sitting there talking to yourself. Life is social. You gotta. It's all theory until you actually put it into practice with somebody.
Okay. I can respect that. You're right. And and that's exactly and I had. In your last relationship, in your last relationship, it doesn't sound like you were quit. I wasn't.
No, no, no. That's not what I was going to say. In your last relationship, it doesn't sound like you were that great of a person. Cuz sounds to me as though you were just being there for the money. You were using the situation.
Well, it was a 30-year gap situation. I was in my. He was in his.
So you were so you were using the situation for money. You said that you were there for the money.
I admitted that.
Okay. So that's not really I mean that's you know I mean he got something out of it too. So but.
I'm just saying that.
But now as a now being a lady a professional growing up mature.
Professional.
Professional what?
A prof I'm a professional.
Professional what?
I'm an um I'm a fiduciary. I'm an agent.
For you real estate professional realtor.
Okay.
Back then I felt I was just young minded and just going through life and doing what I was doing and these and I guess the men I I will meet were doing what they were doing. Now.
A real estate agent. Uh and.
Do you own a do you own a home?
Do I own a home? I own a couple of homes.
Cool. So it sounds like you're doing decent for yourself but.
Yeah. And and that and that's the whole of this conversation.
But but.
That's how we started this.
Living apart by.
Well, but you're not but what the problem is you can be tired of it but if you ever put in the work the actual if you haven't invested in becoming a better version of yourself and actually done the work more likely than not I mean you may be more financially set up but relationally.
I have to put it to the test. You're right. Well, here's the thing. I'll ask you what the men want. And this has been a interesting back and forth, but I'm just.
Okay.
I don't I don't think uh I don't think what I'm getting from you is somebody who really uh is looking to be somebody's support system. Somebody's somebody's help me. That's fine.
No, you don't. That doesn't that doesn't sound like me.
Oh, you used the last man you were with for money.
But I said I grew from that.
Okay. He was he was trying to get what he was trying to get. I couldn't.
And then and then and then all and then all of a sudden you called him gay for it, too.
Well, I just Well, he I I'm going to ask you about this, too. So, cuz when you just said that, uh, it's been three years. Have you seen him with a man?
I've I've seen him ride around town with a man in a car.
No, no, no, no, no, no. That's not you. That that don't that don't fly in that context. No. Then let's not play [ __ ] games with a man's reputation.
Well, I never spread it the news. It was just.
Well, you just said it on You just said it on online. Anybody who knows him, so I need to know.
Well, I didn't say that, man. Anybody can know your face. And if he millions of people watch my [ __ ] so.
I'm in Vegas. Ain't nobody talking in Vegas.
Okay, let me stop. I was young minded back then.
No, no, no, no, no. I know. I'm going to drill down on this. You with a man and you thought he was gay.
Towards.
In the last year. Why?
Towards the end. Yes.
Why?
Okay. You really want to know why?
Yeah.
Okay.
Cuz cuz you said you ain't seen him with nobody. Where's the proof of that?
Oh, well, just when dealing with me, my first scare, my first gay scare from him. Uh, one day we were at at his house and uh, he was taking some pills. I'm just telling you what what my younger mind itself.
Let's get to the point.
Okay. And he was taking some pills and um, I'm like, you know, what are those pills for? You know, I and he was like, oh, my white blood cell count is low. And I I just thought the worst. So that was the first scare. Then the second scare, he he's a he's a plumber. He's a contractor. So he puts plumbing systems in new construction buildings and um he's showing me some plans and he's like, "Yeah, this gay bar that I always go to." And then when I try to bring it back up to him, he forgot that he said that to me. Like I never said that to you. I never said I this gay bar. I'm like, "You showed me some blueprints to off the gay bar that you always go to, you know, I guess you had to redo some plumbing or whatever. Uh tear up the the the uh the gravel or whatever and redo something. I don't know." But he forgot that he said to me that he goes to this gay bar all the time. So, that was my second scare. Then my third scare, he has a boat out at Lake Me. He has a slip. And so, we go out there, we ride the boat, and I see this man bent over working on his car. And I see the man cracking showing and I'm looking at him through my peripheria and we're driving. I hope he don't I'mma keep my face straight, but I'm in my brain like I hope he don't turn to look at this man's crack. But we're down like I see the man like a couple lights down. And as we're getting closer, he looked at the ass crack of the man. And that that was the last straw for me. I could have been shallow or whatever, but there was three instances where I just said I don't want to I don't want to play with my health. So, and he wasn't being I don't feel he was being very honest. Then I seen one picture in his phone dressed in drag. It looked like him, you know. So, I don't know.
You saw a picture of him in drag.
Like I said, it looked like him. It looked it like for somebody, you know, for somebody, you know, you saw you had his phone.
I had He had his phone. He had me. Yes, I had his phone. Yes.
And he had a picture in his phone.
In his phone, of a tall woman, big woman, looked just like him, light-skinned, green eyes, but it was dressed in drag.
I've never Hold on.
Hold on.
No proof. I just what I saw.
Hold on. Hold on. That was a man or a woman? That was a man in that picture.
Okay. And you asked him about it?
No. No, I didn't ask him about it. No.
You were still living with him?
No. No. By this time, I had my own place, but I always there.
Right. But y'all was still sexually active.
Yes, I still go over there.
Okay. You still sexually active still? And I'm.
No, no, no, no, no, no. After I saw the picture.
No, no, no, no, man. But but but you were sexually active in year seven. And like most people, you probably weren't using protection.
No, no, no. That was that was why because he didn't want to use protection.
Okay. No, ma'am. But you were still sexually active in year seven.
So, I want to be clear on what you said. No, stop. No, no. I listen. I want to be clear. No, no, no. I want.
So, the first the first indication Stop. I I got it. The first indication you claiming somebody is gay was what again?
He mentioned some P. He I guess he thought I was dumb enough. I didn't know a white blood cell count low and I felt like anybody with a low blood cell count.
So he was taking some medicine and he told you his white blood cell count was low. So you automatically assumed he was taking some HIV medication.
And so that's when the sex.
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. That's ignorant on your part.
That I just said he.
I'm a cancer survivor. I'm a cancer survivor. My white blood cell count went to zero.
Well, he didn't have cancer.
Oh, no. You don't. No, no, no. But you But see, the point you didn't ask any questions.
So I'm going to repeat back what you said.
Okay.
He was taking some pills and he said something about his white blood cell count. So your brain went to uh I don't I don't need to I don't need to cosign and go cheerlead.
Okay.
So you just say huh that's unusual.
Unusual.
But it went to gay. That's the first thing you went to was gay. You didn't go to anything else other than gay. But then you let it but then you let it go. And then because he is a contractor and he showed you some pictures of of a of a bar he was working on.
That he says he frequents.
You said he said he frequents.
Yes.
And he said that he but he's working on the bar. So frequent can go to work or frequent to attend.
So stop saying no ma'am. Stop. No. No. See I'm not playing. I'm not either. I'm listening.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Cuz now then you're driving down the street and a man is bent over doing something in his car and his butt crack is showing. Not his whole naked ass, his butt crack. And I'm going tell you, most people when they see somebody's butt crack, they look over and laugh. That's You go on the internet right now. Shut up. cuz I don't play with men's reputations and you women always calling somebody gay.
It's just my suspicion.
Yeah. Somebody who somebody who helped you out, paid your bills for years, and this is how you repay him.
To get out. No, no, no, no, no, ma'am. I listen very well. I don't need the co-signing.
I don't need any I don't I don't I don't need No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I don't need any of that. All I need to know is what happened when you asked him.
I never asked.
Okay. So, but but the point of the man and so listen, you can't make this [ __ ] up, people. This is a woman who says, "I you basically I took the man's money and you done gone from a man taking older man taking some pills cuz his blood his his white blood cell count according to you is low." So, that all a sudden has to mean he's gay. And then because he shows you some plans or blueprints or some [ __ ] because he's a plumber that he's working on and he says a bar that I had go to or attend or whatever, you decide to say because he's really secretly going there and then two plus two makes four because he had low blood cell or white blood cell count. And then you link another thing when you driving down the street and some guy that he does not know has his butt crack showing to everyone in the world and because you didn't look at it and he looked over it. Did you know he was looking? Did he paying attention? You don't even know out of context. I don't know. I get to the next one. You said there was drag. You said you had his phone and all of a sudden now see this. This is what I mean. This is why listen, anybody with any common goddamn sense would realize you are reaching like a [ __ ] And you're making one thing, make another thing, make another thing, make another thing. So when we get to the end of it, you're still a woman who can't take accountability for your [ __ ] You had to end a seven-year relationship because you said he thought he was gay, but you was [ __ ] And you never asked. No.
Then you're seven. This is all happening.
No. No. You never asked this man, "Hey, these things are kind of troubling me. I've known you for one, two, three, four, five, six, seven years. You paid my bills. You've done this. You've done that. I need to ask you a question." You never even asked him that. You're just gonna say this [ __ ] and you gonna come on to Instagram this with a 900 almost 900,000 people subscribe to this platform 16,000 people watching the show and just put that [ __ ] out there and assume that no one's going to know it. No one's going to.
No, but you're defending him.
I'm defending I'm defending the man. You goddamn right. Because I'm tired of hearing women like you say some [ __ ] with no [ __ ] proof. Well, to my defense, he was a dick slinger. He had it on his yacht. Dick slinger. I'm just saying.
And he slung his dick all up in your young ass. And you took it the [ __ ] off my channel. See, black men this think. Thank you. What happened when you asked him? Oh, I never asked him. I just accused him.
So, she's 36 years old and from the very start of this call, she could not help herself from interrupting Kevin every single sentence. It didn't matter what the question was before he could even finish. She had to cut in. And the crazy part, she didn't even understand his very basic question at the beginning. Totally unaware of how annoying and disruptive she was throughout the entire conversation. And this right here is the perfect example of why Kevin always pressed women on accountability. Because instead of listening, instead of answering directly, she would say anything, and I mean anything, to avoid taking responsibility. That's why the conversation felt like it was going in circles. It wasn't about clarity. It wasn't about truth. It was about dodging. Now, let's be real here. At 36 years old, almost 40, if you still can't sit down and have a respectful, productive conversation without constant interruption, what does that say about you? It shows immaturity, lack of self-awareness, and lack of discipline. And for men listening to this, this is exactly the type of woman you need to run from. Because if she can't listen for 5 minutes to a man trying to make a point, imagine what a relationship with her would look like. Imagine trying to lead a household when every sentence you speak gets cut off with excuses, deflection, and noise. Here's the thing. When Kevin asked very straightforward questions, she danced around them. When he tried to bring structure to the conversation, she broke it down with interruptions. That's not by accident. That's a defense mechanism. That's what people do when they don't want to face the truth. And at 36, that kind of behavior is a massive red flag. My reaction is this. The reason so many women find themselves single at this age is because of exactly this. They refuse to listen. They refuse to self-reflect. And they'll say anything to avoid accountability. But the clock doesn't stop. Almost 40 years old, still not understanding men, still not owning your role in failed relationships. That's why she's in the position she's in. So, fellas, take note. When you hear constant interruptions, when you see someone dodging the simplest questions, understand that this isn't about communication. It's about control. And men don't want to sign up for that. Men want peace, respect, and cooperation. And if she can't even give that in a short conversation, she's definitely not going to give it in a marriage. Bottom line, she's 36, has no clue, and time is running out. And instead of learning, she's just talking herself into the same problems that have kept her single all this.