Transcription
In this video, I'm going to share 18 tiny habits that instantly make you a more attractive person. And all of these have nothing to do with your physical appearance or your face. It's all in your energy and the way you show up.
Hey friend, welcome back. If you're new here, my name's Jills and I help women step into their power, tap into their divine feminine, and become their best self, live their best life. So, if that's something you want to do, you should subscribe and stick around.
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So, let's just get right on into it. Number one, actually listening to the other person talking instead of just waiting to speak. Although it looks the same from the outside, the energy is completely different. And you've probably felt it. When someone actually truly is listening to you and you feel seen and heard, you like that person more. Some people are just waiting to speak because they just like to talk about themselves. Other people are waiting to speak and thinking about what they're going to say because they're anxious. But either way, when that happens, you lack presence. And presence is beautiful. Presence is attractive.
Number two, being regulated emotionally and not reactive. Having calm, grounded energy is attractive. Whereas being reactive and being triggered by everything is less attractive. Think about it. When you're around people who you can just tell have really regulated nervous systems, there is something so beautiful about that and you want to be around them. Having a regulated nervous system makes you more attractive because it completely shifts your energy and your entire aura.
Number three, people who are attractive have hobbies and passions. They actually have things that they care about and they do in their life that have nothing to do with work and they don't turn every single hobby and every single passion into a monetizable skill. People who have their own lives outside of, you know, just going to work, they have interests, they have creative endeavors. They have depth to them and that makes them magnetic. Their passion makes them magnetic. And these people are also curious, right? People who naturally try new hobbies and have these passions, they're naturally curious people. And naturally, curious people are interesting. They're attractive.
Number four, have a life that feels alive. Okay? Go do things. Get off the couch sometimes and go do things. Go places. Try new things. Say yes to new experiences. Even little small ones. Go to that new coffee shop. Go take that new little pottery class that they're offering at the community center. Just last week, I saw Ludovviko Inati. And if you don't know who he is, he's a famous pianist and composer. And I've never been to a concert like that. And it was wonderful. It was beautiful. I thoroughly enjoyed it. Travel can be huge for this as well. You know, people who have stories, people who are engaged with the world, who actually live life, they're interesting, and you can feel that aliveness radiating from their aura, and it makes them magnetic. It makes them attractive.
Number five, assume people like you. If you assume that you are an attractive person and that people like you, people are more likely to treat you that way. You show up in that way and people mirror that back to you. And if you assume people don't like you, the same is true in reverse. People start to subconsciously mirror that back to yourself. This is not being entitled or obnoxious. This is just being confident. And confident energy is attractive.
Number six is not rushing through everything. Rushing energy is anxious energy. But when you slow down and move in a softer way, in a more confident way, again, there's a presence to that. There's a confidence to that. There's a magnetic energy about that. Why isn't she rushing? Why is she so calm? What does she have figured out? What does she know that I don't? Again, goes back to the regulated nervous system. People with regulated nervous systems tend to not rush so much. It all kind of comes back to the same thing.
Number seven, if you want to be more attractive, make decisions without seeking validation. You don't need to ask everyone's opinions before you decide on something. And you don't need to overexlain why you decided what you decided. You do not have to overexlain your decisions, your actions, your feelings. When you overexlain, you're trying to justify it. You're trying to subconsciously get approval and get validation from the other person. So, when it comes to what outfit you're going to wear when you go to dinner with your girlfriends or what job offer you're going to take, it doesn't matter. Listen to yourself and make the decision. Be confident in your decision. That confidence completely shifts your energy and the way people see you. Even if they don't agree with the choices you made or they think your outfit that you chose is ugly, it doesn't matter. That confidence is magnetic.
And number eight, attractive people that people want to be around, those people are excited for life. Those people romanticize the life. They still celebrate all the little holidays and they still get excited for little date night with their partner or whatever. Joyful energy and enthusiasm make you attractive and people want to be around that kind of energy. So, romanticize life. Be excited by the little things. Be excited to try that new coffee shop that just opened a few blocks from your apartment. Celebrate milestones. Celebrate birthdays. I love people who are excited by life. Almost everybody does because it feels good to be around them.
Number nine, people who come off as attractive are able to respectfully disagree with people. And here's what I mean. Like think about the person who has an opinion on something or has a certain value related to something. That's fine. That's great. Everyone can have their own opinions and their own values. But when you come across someone who disagrees with that opinion or maybe has a different set of values, how do you react? So people who react by yelling and shaming the other person and getting all aggressive and being all triggered, that's unattractive. It is so unattractive. But when you can have grace during a disagreement, that is attractive. Whether that is having grace with someone you disagree with on the internet or having grace with a disagreement that you have with your partner or having grace with the disagreement you have with a family member, but being able to have that grace and being able to say, "We agree to disagree." That's okay. That shows that you have nothing to prove again that you have a regulated nervous system. Being able to do that takes maturity and emotional intelligence, and not everyone has that. But if you do, that makes you way more attractive.
Number 10, keep promises to yourself. Having discipline is attractive. Having self-commitment is attractive. Even if these promises to yourself are private and nobody knows about them, it still shifts your energy. It makes you a more powerful person and people can feel that.
And next, number 11, don't rush to fill awkward moments. Attractive people have this general ease within themselves and being able to be comfortable in silence, that shows ease within yourself. When you're having a conversation and there's a 5-second little gap in the convo, which happens sometimes, that's normal, you know, and no one knows what to say next. How do you react in that situation? Are you comfortable with it or are you resisting it? Are you calm in that or do you immediately get anxious? That difference in how you react and how you respond to awkward moments, any awkward moments, it reveals something about yourself.
Number 12, remember small details about people. This instantly makes you more attractive. This is the kind of thing that people don't forget. Whether you remember the name of someone's dog or the fact that this person's daughter um just started ballet and she told you about that last time, how excited she was to take her daughter, her first daughter to ballet, remembering that this person hates cheese. People love this. People will remember you. It's thoughtful. It's a kind thing to do and it signals you care. And being a genuinely good person makes you a more attractive person.
Number 13, speak with confidence and certainty but not arrogance. And there is a difference. And even science has shown that people who speak with certainty are more well-liked. And this is really interesting. People who have doctors who spoke with certainty even if they were wrong, right? They spoke with certainty, but their diagnosis were wrong. Their patients actually liked those doctors more simply because they spoke with certainty. When you speak with confidence and certainty, it comes off as attractive. People like it. People gravitate to you more.
Number 14, being able to laugh at yourself. Okay, embarrassment is a choice. Everybody makes mistakes. Everybody has weird moments. Everybody has awkward moments. That is a part of being human. But whether you're embarrassed by that or not, that is a choice. It shows you're confident, you're emotionally secure, you're a playful person, all of that is attractive.
Number 15, have goals and a sense of direction. Even if those things change over time, they probably will change over time, and that's okay. It's not about having it all figured out. It's about being in motion towards something, caring about something, being passionate about something, and caring about things is attractive.
Number 16, give people your full attention. People who are attractive are present with you, right? You can feel that you like people more when they are present with you. when you are talking to them and they're actually looking at you making eye contact. They're not looking out around the room and you know like messing with their hair and messing with their clothes or the worst picking up their phone and like texting someone and ignoring you. Give people your full attention. Real presence is becoming rare, but that's what makes it so powerful. That's what makes it so attractive.
Number 17, you don't always need to win. You don't always have to prove your point. You don't always have to be right. Not needing to win all the time and prove your point is one of the most underrated subtle forms of confidence. This is more than just being able to have grace with a disagreement. This is different. This is deeper than this. Sometimes that connection matters more than being right and it matters more than winning. But also sometimes we're wrong and that's okay. Sometimes the most attractive thing you can do is be like, "Oops, my bad. I'm sorry." Or, "You know what? I see your point and that makes sense." or even I know what's true for me and that's good enough. I don't need to win you over.
And this leads me into my last point, number 18, being at ease with yourself and having radical self-acceptance. This has nothing to do with the way you look, but it will completely shift the way people see you. When you are at ease with yourself, when you are confident with yourself, when you think that you're beautiful, when you like who you are, when you're at peace with who you are, it radiates from your aura without you needing to do anything. And people can feel it. There's this gravitational pull that exists towards people who are comfortable in their own skin. It's undeniable. It's simple. Sometimes if you want people to perceive you as more attractive, you have to decide to see yourself as attractive first. This is where real beauty and real attractiveness starts. Are you at ease with yourself with how you are and how you look and all of your features? Or are you fighting yourself? Because the first is much more confident, much more attractive, and much more magnetic.
And that is why you need to go watch this video here, the psychology of being hot. It's all about how hot is a mindset. And if you think that's delusional, I highly recommend you watch this video first before you jump to conclusions. So, I'll see you over there or I'll just see you next time in my next video. Thank you so much for watching. Bye.