Transcription
Hello everybody. So you guys absolutely devoured the feminine energy video, so I decided to deliver. Today's video is going to be all about embodying the feminine energy, also the differences between the light feminine and the dark feminine. I want to really dive into how to live that soft, beautiful, nurturing life, as well as standing on business as a woman and, you know, knowing your dark feminine and how to work with it, as well as the light feminine. Because there is something so fulfilling about living that in-tune life with both of these sides. So today I want to share some tips on how to truly embrace both of those sides and bring balance so that you can create a joyful and fulfilling life, as well as achieving your goals, of course.
So the feminine energy is often associated with, like, this, you know, of course gentle, but kind of naive and, you know, just like blind life—not blind, I mean in a sense that you're being, of course, led by the masculine energy, which to a point is true. If you're really like overly light feminine, you know, you have that like "Dandy" effect. But the feminine energy also has the darker side, which I feel is also portrayed wrong. Both sides are equally as important and powerful, especially if you know how to balance them. So whether you're just aiming for a better aura or a better energy overall, or really to, like, step into your power as a woman, then these tips are just for you.
So my tip number one is to reflect on yourself and do shadow work. Reflection is important, no matter what you're trying to embody or improve, because it gives you the feedback on what you are doing, and you have to become super self-aware on everything. The light feminine energy invites you more to, like, understand yourself and have compassion; however, the darker feminine wants to go deeper inside those problems, you know. So if you're—say, if let's say you're really unhappy with something, or you're anxious, or you have some resentment in yourself—the light feminine energy is going to be the compassionate one, the one where you're like, "Oh, you have to love yourself, and you have to, you know, be compassionate," and of course that's amazing. But the darker feminine goes deeper into that; you are working—it wants you to work with what's happening and what caused that to happen. So that's the whole point of shadow work. You can find—there's so many journal prompts online for shadow work; of course, I can in a future video share that too. But I feel like that really applies to what you're dealing with. You know, ask your—you have to really open yourself up to yourself and acknowledge a lot of things that you perhaps have been tucking away in your brain, not wanting to think about it. But the shadow work is there for you to work through it, and in that way it pushes you further by bringing these aspects and those traumas and those wounds that you've perhaps been neglecting. You take—take your power back; you don't let it make you anxious anymore; you don't let it depress you; you don't let it take over you. Instead, you take your power back, work through it, and then turn to be a more powerful and feminine and happier and more secure person. Questions can be—these are pretty—I don't want to say basic, but very broad. It can be something like, "What are you afraid of?" "What are some traumas that you've been looking past?" Or, for example, if you get into a fight with somebody, it can be, "Why did that—um, why did that argument trigger me, really?" You know, like, look into your triggers; look into the actual mistakes you've been doing, whether it is with yourself, whether it is on your self-improvement journey, or even in your relationships, in your friendships, in your family relationships—with anything. Look really into that and be so honest with you and build self-awareness so that you can grow. Because neglecting and just turning away from your problems isn't going to solve them; it's just going to rot you inside, which is really awful to say, but it is that way. You can't really self-improve without looking over the most key things that led you to those bad decisions, those bad reactions, and those bad traits overall.
Now, don't get me wrong, there's no—nobody is perfect; we all have bad traits, but not accepting them and not working with them and understanding them is just going to lead you further away from being the person you want to be. I know I had a lot of—or I still have a lot of bad traits that I'm start—that I'm trying to understand, and I'm trying to go through them and understand what triggers them and perhaps why it triggers me and why I tend to react in certain moments that way. I don't understand it yet completely, but I'm working towards it. I'm asking myself; I'm communicating with myself about the mistakes I've made and about the things I don't like about myself. This is more meant for your, like, mind and not your—um, looks, because looks are so surface level. Yeah, you can un—you can work on understanding why perhaps you don't like that physical part of yourself—like, "Why do I hate my—that—that—that so much?" But this is really about your emotions, not about the way you look.
So we started off with a really deep one, so let's continue to number two, which is create some sort of alert around yourself. Don't give yourself off completely, especially to strangers. You know, like, keep a little bit of that mystery around yourself. Practice self-containment and the way you talk, the way you present yourself. You know, like, of course, like we all have tendencies to just, like, walk into a room and be like happy and loud, but keep that for your friends, not for strangers, because you never know what those strangers' intentions are. You know, like, analyze first and then slowly show yourself. You know, it doesn't mean isolating yourself; it's just—it just means respecting your personal space enough to not let everybody in. Not to mention that this whole, like, mystery thing is pretty magnetic, and you know, people tend to love it. But that is—I would say very surface level. If you want to go in on the deeper—um, intention of this, it's just to create a boundary and, like, a little bubble that just certain people who achieve your standards get to go in. And this applies to absolutely everybody, not just, like, romantic relationships, also for friendships. Just don't overshare, because there's a lot of people who don't wish a lot of good things on you. There's going to be people who are going to use things you say against you. This sounds—this sounds really brutal, but overall I honestly really believe in the evil eye, and I don't like telling people my business. I'm—I'm going to tell the closest people, and that's it, because I know the intentions of these people, and I know that the reason why they would disagree with me is because they mean well for me. But if it's a stranger or a person who I'm not really sure what their intentions—I don't know what their intentions are—I could be telling them something amazing, and they would be like, "Oh, I don't think it's good for you," but it could be just because they're jealous or envious, not because they actually think it's not going to be good for me, you know. And honestly, this little bubble has like five people probably, which includes my family members, my man, and my best friend, and that is basically it. And then, of course, you know, it goes into levels, but overall make sure not to give yourself off too much, especially with strangers.
Leading onto that, we have tip number three, which is to set boundaries. Boundaries are extremely essential, especially for the feminine energy—especially—you won't believe me how much I value boundaries. Boundaries are like the core to everything. It can be—again—boundaries with yourself, which is a lot about self-respect, and then boundaries with others. That boundary gives you kind of like a little bubble, and you don't want anybody popping that bubble, because that bubble keeps you safe; that bubble keeps you—that bubble nurtures you; that bubble gives you the strength that you need; that bubble makes you happy; that bubble makes you productive. It can be whatever, but don't let anybody pop that bubble. So how I would balance these two energies into this tip is, you know, the light feminine is the graceful one; it's the kind one, the warm one, and the dark one is the one that stands on business, essentially. So you don't have to be mean about setting boundaries; you don't have to be—of course, if somebody hurts you, then you have to be—I would—I don't say you have to be mean, but you have to be firm. But if—if that person isn't exactly, like, triggering you—for example, they—they not—they don't know their boundaries—you have to realize that that a lot of people—you can't be mad at them for—um, for example, overstepping your boundaries if you weren't clear on your boundaries. You have to be clear on your boundaries, because everybody has different boundaries; everybody grew up differently; everybody has—has different style of life, and everybody's boundaries are going to be pretty much different. But you can be mad unless it's something like, of course, horrific. But if somebody oversteps your boundary unknowingly and you get mad at them, that's not good; that's not good, because it was your responsibility to make those boundaries clear and address them firmly beforehand. The boundaries are here to protect you and allow you to nurture yourself and take care of yourself and others; it's not here to—um, upset anybody else. If they're upset, they're issue, but it's not here to upset—it's here to protect you, and in many cases other people around you too. But get clear on the boundaries that you have, the non-negotiables that you have, and communicate—be clear on it. Don't—again—don't get mad at somebody for accidentally or unknowingly overstepping your boundaries when you haven't communicated it. Embracing those boundaries and standing on business is one of the most powerful things you can actually do as a woman, because as a woman you hold the preciousness; you hold the life; you are the one nurturing the life; you're the one who holds the power. And it can be—also, of course, this can also apply to, like, female relationships, not just, like, you know, romantic relationships, but overall just don't let anybody upset you, or don't be scared to let anybody know that they're doing something wrong, because that way they can improve, and you're going to be happy. And if they get mad at you, then it's their fault; let them go. But communicate.
My tip number four is to pamper yourself—just easy as that. And it's not really something extra hard or extra complicated; just nurture yourself, essentially. At the end of the day, it's kind of an investment into myself, because if I feel good, I'm going to be more productive; if I feel good, I'm going to make everybody else around me feel good; if I feel good, I'm going to be secure. Now, this doesn't mean like, "Oh, if I do my makeup today, I'm going to be secure, but if I don't, I'm going to be insecure." No, this is not about that. The fact that you take care of yourself, whether it is mentally or physically, the fact that you show up for yourself and take care of your mind, body, and soul on a daily basis shows that you respect yourself, and that then gives you the confidence and the security. So it's not about, like, essentially wearing makeup, but it is about the fact that you take the time of your day to do something for yourself, and—and you know—just be happy about it. But yeah, it's just—it's easy; just don't spend too much money, of course. You don't—don't spend the money you don't have on beauty treatments and stuff like that. It can be just like that you—that at the end of the day you take a nice shower, you make yourself a cup of tea, put on some nice pajamas, and you go to bed early and you read a book. That can be self-care; whatever self-care means to you, do that. Whatever makes you feel confident and pampered, do that; whatever is in your budget, do that. Yeah, it doesn't have to be anything extreme, just to make that clear. I don't want anybody spending money they don't have on things they don't need.
My fifth tip is embrace your emotions, as well as the dark ones, but learn how to control them. So don't ever go and neglect your emotions because they're not good, or because—because they aren't appropriate, or because they are not suitable for the moment—for example, I don't know—but that means acknowledge the emotion in any moment, but learn how to control it. And if you want to show it—so if, for example, something irrational triggers you, you know it's irrational, and you feel like, "Okay, I acknowledge this emotion; I'm going to go through it, but do I need to show it?" Probably no; probably no. You have to also choose who you're showing your emotions to; you can't just show your emotions to everybody, because that also kind of makes you vulnerable, right? And so this is where the dark feminine comes in. The dark feminine is here to protect your light feminine, especially when it comes to, like, emotions, because the dark feminine is not—it's not about hiding your emotions; it's about controlling them and deciding to who you're going to show your emotions to and how. So you know, for example, with a partner, if—and I have to work on this myself—but if you're going to, for example, get into a fight and you have a burst of emotions, acknowledge them—acknowledge those emotions because they're there for a reason—but decide on whether you should show them or not and how, and perhaps learn to control them. Now, this is—I feel like this is such a hard—hard topic, because overall understanding how to control your emotions can be so hard, because you can essentially understand it—why you need to control your emotions—but it's still in those moments where you have, like, bursts, for example, of anger, or even, like, good emotions, it can be so hard to just, like, calm down; it can be so hard to, like, just bring yourself back, right? As well as the light feminine teaches you how to accept your emotions, the dark feminine teaches you how to let them go—how to let go—let go of emotions that don't serve you and emotions that hurt you. Again, acknowledge everything, because those tucked-away emotions are just going to cause extreme harm later on; it can be years on; it doesn't have to be few days or weeks; it can be literally years on. If you're hiding and tucking away emotions, it's going to ball up, and then years maybe go by, and then just boom—they just going to melt down, burst out, and it's going to just eat you up from inside. You know, don't judge your emotions, because that's God's job; acknowledge them; try to understand them; perhaps have a little empathy for them, and then release them. There's multiple ways of releasing emotions; it can be journaling; it can be movement; it can be communication. If somebody made you mad, learn how to release those emotions in a peaceful and constructive conversation. And all of this essentially gives you—again—the power to feel confident, to feel secure, to nourish yourself, and to basically, like, protect yourself, right? I would just like to touch up that also, like, don't be scared to stand up for yourself. Um, so you know, if some—if you feel like—if you get triggered by somebody disrespecting you, don't be like, "I'm going to work through it." No, let them know—let them know, like, why wouldn't you let them know? You know, it's just—learn how to let them know. Don't be like coming up to them screaming into their face; just tell them that they made you angry; you didn't like it; you're—you respect yourself too much, and bye-bye.
Next tip is just acknowledging your power—acknowledging the power you have as a woman and what that means to others and essentially what—just imagine—think about it—how much power a woman actually has. Although we live in a world where the world is—I would say—more adjusted to a masculine energy and to a man's life, we're still the one who hold the power in a lot of things. Because let's be honest, at the end of the day, what do—why do men do all the good—good things they want to do? It's mostly—again—backed up by feminine energy. There are men who do things for their mother—feminine energy; there are men who do things for their wives—again, feminine energy; and there are men who do things for their children—again, feminine energy. So you have to understand that you're the one who holds power, and you have to just fall in love with the fact that you are a woman. I know that there are certain aspects that make it hard sometimes, but overall just learning to love it and learning to embrace the fact that you are a woman is going to do magic for you. Now, when I'm talking about power, I don't talk about, like, the power—I'm talking about the power—you know, it's not aggressive power; it's ambitious power; it's the power of—again—nurturing; it's the power of standing on business; it's the power of holding your—the precious self together and respecting yourself—respecting yourself enough to not do what you want, but essentially—yeah—actually do what you want. You know, if you have certain goals and dreams, you have to respect that. It can be goals of having a family. So if your goal is to have a family, then why are you going to go out with a guy who does not care, who is not family-oriented, who wants to go 50/50 with you on everything, who essentially doesn't even respect women? Why? Why? That is a disservice to yourself; not embracing your power and your goals and your—is a disrespect to yourself. You want to have a great husband because you respect yourself, and potentially you want the best for your future children. And also don't be afraid to take up space, because if somebody is mad at you for taking up space, they can leave. Because a person that loves you is not going to be mad at you for taking space, for having standards, for, you know, being firm and standing on business with what you want and your boundaries; they're not going to be mad at you; they're going to respect you for it, and they're going to love that about you. Because nobody wants to be around—and I don't want to—I don't want this to sound mean—but nobody wants to be around a weak person, right? Because that doesn't do good to anything—to friendships, to relationships, to nothing. They want an ambitious person, a person who's secure, who knows their power—that's what people essentially want, right? A healthy relationship, which is all about those things.
The last thing is to surrender and let it go. Because at the end of the day, bad things happen for a reason. Every single bad thing that is happening is happening for a reason, because God wants it that way. So why are you going to be upset about something not working out, or something—of course, you can allow—you can be upset about it—but let it go—let it—at the end of the day, let it go, because it does not serve you. Let go of habits that don't serve you; let go of people who aren't good for you; and let go of mindsets that are not pushing you anywhere. And by the surrender, I mean just surrender to your flow; surrender to the fact that you are a woman; you are always going to be a woman, and there are just different traits in a woman and a man, and let—let go of that; surrender to it; accept it; and embrace it. Because you know, I was—I remember I—of course, I had a phase where I was like, "Oh my God, I hate being a woman, because it's so hard, and you know, men are here achieving everything, and men have it so much easier." No, that's not going to get you anywhere; this—not going to get you anywhere. And God wanted you to be a woman for a reason; then be a damn woman. And yeah, just like let go of anything that doesn't serve you—like the habits, and especially—especially friends. Because as a female, I feel like we are—we can get so influenced by our friendships, and the minute you are in a—are friends with a person who—first of all, that is the worst scenario—doesn't actually like you, but they can like you; they can love you, but their lifestyle is so out of touch with your lifestyle, and they are on the complete opposite scale of your life—you honestly, I'm sorry to break it to you—but you cannot be good friends. Yeah, you can love them from far; you know, check in on them, and perhaps attend their birthday party, or I don't know, but you—do you really want that to be a part of your life? Because the minute you let somebody into your life, their lifestyle and their morals are going to become a part of your life. Choose wisely who are you going to be letting into your life, because essentially that forms your own life. I always used to be like, "Oh, no, it's not true," but yes, it is true. Something that I always—when I was a little bit younger—I used—I refused to believe, because I was in a weird—because I was in a kind of shitty—not that those people were shitty, but it was just like a shitty—uh, it was just a shitty friend group. And so I always just to be like, "No, it's not true; it's not true," but it is true: You are the average of the five people closest to you. Keep that in mind. If you are too scared to let go of people because you're going to be alone, be alone, because it's going to serve you so much better, and you're going to create space for other people who are essentially going to be so much better for you than these people and are going to make you so much happier, and it's just going to be such a more genuine connection than what you probably have now. But by accepting—letting go—and by accepting change, you—again—you bring the power back, because nothing can put you off; no person, nothing can throw you off of your—I don't know—life goal or life mission or whatever you want to call it. It will give you such peace at heart knowing that nothing can actually throw you off long term. Yeah, you can be sad about it; it can upset you; but letting go of all of this is going to bring you so much peace into life, and knowing how to let go and knowing how to not dwell on stuff that will essentially not mean anything in 10 years—or maybe they—maybe let's say—yeah—you would think, "Oh my God, he was the love of my life, but now I'm going to be lonely." Stop. You're not going to be lonely; you're going to be just—just fine, because everything is happening for a reason. That's why you need to let go and surrender. Just work on yourself; make sure that you are a good person; that you are working towards your dream; that you are making yourself a better person, so that all those amazing people and all those amazing opportunities are going to meet you in the future. So that basically sums up my whole video. I really hope you liked it, and I hope you took something away from this video on how to really balance these out and—and gave you a little bit of a kick—and be gentle on yourself; nurture yourself, but also know how to stand on business. So if you enjoyed this video, then I would really love it if you'd subscribe, and you can also check out my social media for more daily content. And yeah, I love you. I thank you so much for all the feedbacks that I've gotten on my previous videos; it makes me so happy, and I'm just so happy that I got you guys. Bye.