Transcription
Good morning. Good morning everyone.
Okay. Um, I want to, uh, uh, welcome you to the second day, and we're going to continue with, I'm going to take you into the subject of defy gravity today. We're going to enter into this through, um, a subject we touched on yesterday, which is, um, our passionate love of reason. And then we're going to travel through reason into, um, the subject of truth, and from there into mystical consciousness. Okay, that's how I've outlined it. Let's see if I can stick to it.
Okay, what I brought up yesterday was, um, just to summarize and put us all on the same track, was, um, the age of enlightenment and how that has formed us. And it's formed us in a way that is, uh, served us, and now we're coming to the close of that enlightenment. Is my board still here? Okay, it'd be gone. And we remember, we remember the three columns. Okay. And so we're entering that age of Aquarius and the, and the end of the two fishes, the end of Pisces.
Now, as we come to the end of the age of enlightenment, we could say we're coming to the end of a certain type of enlightenment. And that is, we're coming to the end of our capacity to reason our way through, to reason our way through the challenges facing us as individuals, to reason our way through. It's a, it's an archetypal model. And we're coming to the end of our way of a model of thought that says there's one reason for every single crisis. And I mentioned that yesterday. But what you, what you, what you have to appreciate is that model is locked into you. That, that model is so intensely locked into you that when a crisis hits you, whether that is a personal problem, a financial crisis, or a health crisis, by instinct now, you will look for one reason and one reason only as to why it's happened. Just one. You will look for only one. What is the one reason why this has happened to me? There's got to be one. And you'll go on a search and destroy mission for that one thing. Was it my childhood? My parents? Was it something someone said to me? As if the whole of your life and the whole of a disease could be erupting 30 years later because of something someone once said to you.
Now, I want you to just ponder on how preposterous that is. And yet, our whole holistic model of health is based on that nonsense. Is based on that nonsense. And you wonder why, I wonder why, I don't know about you, but it is no wonder to me at all why people do not heal. They don't heal. Problems are not resolved. People are on medication up to the ceiling because the model is itself the most faulty model in the world. But it satisfies one thing, and it satisfies the idea that there's got to be a reason. We're just not figuring out what the one reason is. But the fact is, we're at the end of that form of reasoning, and we're at the beginning of a new way of, and it's not reasoning, but perception.
So now we have to introduce another word where even the word reasoning needs to be removed from our vocabulary, and the word perception introduced. You'll no longer be able to maneuver or navigate your situations by trying to reason with them. You cannot reason with a crisis. You cannot reason through detox. You cannot reason with any obstacle in your life. And you certainly can't reason with a trauma. They're not reasonable events. What's reasonable about a trauma? Right? One has to perceive them.
And this is where I want to introduce to you a level of consciousness that I think about more in keeping with the blending of the best of your intellect and the best of your soul. And that's what made up a mystic. A mystic. You know what? People think of mystics as these extreme individuals who fled to caves and to, uh, monasteries. When in fact, they were the most rebellious intellects of their time. They were absolute rebels. When, when I was in, uh, Rome with, with Sue and, and Dave and Fran and, and Georgia, right before we came here, we visited a church of Ignatius Loyola. He, of all people, was one of the most fabulous renegades ever. He was a soldier who was shot and brought in, and, and the last thing Ignatius ever wanted to do was become a priest. And who he eventually became the great scholar and the great mystic, and one of the, and the foremost format, form, uh, originator of spiritual direction.
But here's the thing about what it is to be called, and I, I need to emphasize this because in these days, part of the suffering I see in people is that they are being called, and they don't recognize it, and they reduce it to a psychological problem. They look for the origin of their suffering or the origin of their inner discomfort as if there's something wrong with their life. There's something wrong with my life. Something wrong. Something's going wrong. And the reason they believe that is because the model of life that we've lived according to is that we either have pain or we have pleasure, and there's nothing in between. And that all pain is essentially wrong. If you're in pain, something is wrong. We don't distinguish that some pain is, in fact, a calling and needs to be followed, needs to be followed, that it's a voice that says, "Come this way. Come this way." That when a, a, a part of your life becomes dismantled, it's what Teresa would call, you're entering the cocoon. It's what John would say of the cross, so begins the dark night of the soul. That Teresa would say, you're beginning to dissolve into holiness. What a phrase. What a phrase. Dissolve into holiness. That I really, I, I have to pause. It's so extraordinary that you are beginning to, the shape you've come in, and everything in your life is melting away from you. And if you really had eyes to see, you'd realize no human being could so dismantle your life. And you can look for someone to blame. What a foolish thing to do. What human being has that kind of power over you? Are you so foolish? No human being has that kind of authority as to dismantle the whole of your life. That's your first signal. Your first signal that the, the non-physical world has swept in for a visit. And the best you can do is lean back and say, "What are you going to do? How bad is this going to be? What do you want?" Because you can't fight it. And the most you can do is just like a caterpillar, get ready to go into your cocoon and turn into gel. Just gelatin. You're going to lose your shape. You're going to lose everything. And if you try to fight it, you'll kill the birth of your wings. So, you have to say, "What are you going to take from me? My identity, my environment, my job, who I thought I was, who I thought I was, my way of being in the world, my defense mechanisms. You're going to humble me. You're going to wipe me out, probably. Have at it, because you can't fight it. You're going to take my health the way I thought. Am I going to limp after this? Possibly. Possibly. Am I going to wake up a diabetic? Maybe. Maybe an epileptic. Maybe. Okay. Brace yourself, because they're going to win. And all the mourning you can do for the person you were."
And one of the things I learned is that when a person comes to me and says, "I need to heal," inevitably, it is amazing to me, will begin, and the image they hold of themselves is when they'll start with this visualization nonsense, is that they visualize themselves as a 30-year-old. Here they are at 50, 55, in not so good a shape. They haven't exercised in 35 years, but they visualize themselves as a 30-year-old, young and happy, and that's what they think the return to their health is. And that's what they want, like a Christmas present. It is absolutely extraordinary to me. Which means it told me many, many things, and I have to say, I, I have found very few exceptions to this, that you are unreasonable with yourself. That how you reason is fundamentally faulty. That how you reason and see the world has a fundamental absence of, here's the big word we're coming to, truth. That though you have a, that there is a major difference between what is true and what is truth. What is true is totally relative. What's true for you is not true for me, and never will be. And then there's truth. And we will fight. And one of the reasons we will fight to the death over what's true. You said this, and I said this. We will never agree. Never. It is an absolutely anti-inomial position that one has to work to attain where you get to the point where you acknowledge both sides are equally true, and that's all there's to it. Your true, true is as true as my true, and neither are actually true at all. And that's the paradoxical truth. And now we hit a truth. There is no truth in either side, but both are equally true. Ponder that one. Are you with me here?
Okay. It takes a little maneuvering there. I've watched some people go, "What did she say?" But you got it. But here, we're going to hit a pause button, and we're going to jump over here to the subject of truth itself as one of the expressions of God. A mystical law, the truth will set you free. A mystical law, the truth will set you free. What I just shared with you is an impersonal mystical truth. It belongs to all of us equally. All of us equally. Nobody owns that truth. It's a cosmic truth. I could take it and drop it anywhere in any religion, in any culture, and it's equally truth. Agreed? It has no religion to it. Agreed? That's a cosmic truth. That's called a mystical truth. There is no signature of anything. It will be as true today as it was a thousand years ago. It is an ageless universal mystical truth belonging to no one. All is one. Same thing. Who does it belong to? No one. A mystical truth. What is in one is in the whole. A mystical truth belonging to everyone. I want you to imagine that mystical truth in the ninth chakra, the chakra of the universe. Universal truth hangs out. Ninth. I need my glasses. I need my pen.
Now, we're going to go into the expressions of God. Whoopsie. Sorry. We're going to go into you truth. The mansions going to touch. No, not the mansions. We're going to go into the graces. Wait. Three, four, five. I, not, you know how I think in, I just think in all of them simultaneously, and it's not easy because I get my, my own, my, I can, can confuse myself. Okay, we're up here. Where are we now? We're up here. So, we're going to put this for CT, the celestial truths. Okay? What we're going to do now is incarnate these. And I want you to think of this as the light zone, the expression of God. What is a mystical experience? There is no time up here. We're in timelessness. This is, you know, my little man. You know my little man?
Okay. Can all of you see my little man? Okay. So, when I do a reading on you, and this is important. So, this is big. Here's, here's your mouth. I emphasize with you, as I did yesterday, that every choice you make is an investment of your grace. Here's your, here's your grace coming in all the time. And that with or without me. And if you pause and reflect the moment you, you, you, you make a shadow choice, the moment something threatens you, the second, the microsecond, and you make a shadow choice. If you are attuned, and the more attuned you become, you will perceive, perceive, you will sense something say to you, "Do you really want to do that? Do you really want to do that? You really want to do that?" And if it's a mega, let's say it's a mega thing where you're in an argument with someone you really care about, you really love this person, and you are fighting. You are really, really fighting, and your pride, number one. Now it's a matter of pride. You got to win. And you decide, should you really pull out something? Now, this is, this is tribal history. Nothing is not in everything is in this map. I could have double negative, but I won't. Everything is in this map. You go to your tribal history and you think, "I could use the past. I could throw out some really nasty wounds. Well, you were always this way. And remember when you did this to me?" You could, you could cut below the belt. See, why do we say this? Third chakra, below the belt. But then you think, if I do that, I'll destroy his or her pride. Right? But you got to win. This is like one, two. And you think, and in that flash, you hear a voice, and that voice says, "If you do this, you'll take down everything. Is it worth it?" In that second, you hear the pause, and you all have been there, and you all know what I'm talking about. Is it worth losing the tribe, your home, over your pride, just to win in a second? That voice is your angel. That is what a, that is what grace sounds like right there. Just so you register it. It is a voice of force greater than your own rage. Greater than your rage. Greater than your reason. Greater than your reason. Because your reason, in moments when you are out of control, fully unreasonable, and your pride is so toxic that you'd come down and destroy somebody. Something sweeps in and says, "Are you sure you want to do this?" But if you'll notice, it never tells you in those moments what to do. It presents you with a question. Grace always presents you with a question, unless it's saving your life, and it will say, "Don't go there. Don't go there. Do this." Grace always. But in moments like that, it will present you with a question, and then it's up to you. So, it's very fascinating when grace swoops in as a question. And one, it gives you instructions. And often the instructions come at a time when you are being instructed to heal another person, to serve, as in the metaphor of Jesus, "Be my hands in the world. Be my hands in the world." But at that point, you have to have a very strong soul and be strong enough to keep your mouth shut and keep your ego under control. If you're the braggadocious kind, you won't hear instructions like that. Okay?
So, let's go up here. And what I want to say to you is, every single choice you make sets something in flight. Let's say you were in one of those arguments. What you're always doing is you're directing your energy outside of yourself. You're directing your grace or your energy. Every single, every single circuit, every single choice directs this out of your field. And you are in a field. I want you to imagine you're in a field of grace. And I, if, if we talk, start with, "What is enlightenment? What is the Buddha? What is an avatar? What is an enlightened soul?" It's someone filled with light. Who's, whose being is more light than matter, whose beingness commands matter over light. You following me? Of course you are. Healing at the speed of light is when you can com, you can absorb light faster than the speed at which matter can heal. Pull out a bottle of meds. It says, "Take for six weeks." Translate: "I'll be sick for six weeks." Huh? Light alters the speed of that. It can heal in six seconds, instantaneously. But here, here's your laboratory. Four, five, six, and seven is where you do your inner work. There's no inner work here. Your first, second, and third chakras are the recipient of your inner work. You don't think with your second chakra, you function with your second chakra. There's no thinking here, folks. This is an action zone. What does your body do down here? It's all action that is the result of consciousness done up here. Whether it's love or thought, choice down here takes its commands from up here. You with me? And then up here takes its orders from up here, your archetypal patterns and your graces and shadow, shadow passion. This is the order of creation, all function. So up here, and if you think of a Jesus or a Buddha, they're fully contained in light. So light goes into matter instantaneously. There's no time built in. This is how time is built into matter. So the more you have anchors, childhood issues, illusions, Buddha illusions, the more stop this psychic, think of it as psychic weight. Therefore, you add equals time and space. Therefore, the more weight you add, another word would be gravity. There's your formula. There's your formula.
So, if I'm reading somebody and I see that they have a lot of anchors in their past, and anchors, by the way, anchors are not just events and traumas. They are beliefs a person has and attitudes that are preposterous, but you have to hold on to them. They're should have, would have, coulds. They're entitlements. They're the need for this, that, and the other that you have actually no need for, but yes, you do. That's who I am. That's what I want. It's like, if you look at, look at British Petroleum. Not in a million years would British Petroleum have thought that they had a need for an insurance policy for a platform that would blow up and flood the Gulf of, uh, Mexico and, and, and, and Louisiana, right? You all know about the oil spill. Not in a million years would they, putting 200,000 gallons of oil into the Gulf per day, killing all the fish and the life and, and the shores and all of that. They would say that's impossible because that's how they think. They would say, "That can never happen." And they would say, "We can never go broke because we're too big." Enron said, "We can never go broke." The Titanic said, "We would never sink because it's never happened." Therefore, it can't happen. The idea that it would never, holding on to a never, is a this. That can never happen. That's an illusion. Everything can happen. Everything can happen from an extraterrestrial invasion to an instantaneous tsunami hitting the coast of, of England, to Japan, to New York. Everything can happen. Just because it hasn't happened, or you don't want it to happen, or you go into denial like a little rabbit under a bed, doesn't mean it can't happen. But you hold on to it simply because you can't bear the thought of it. Concentration camps can happen in the United States. They simply put them in Poland and other countries. Under Bush, of course, they happened again, and they'll happen again and again. That's the predatorial nature of the human being. That's what we do to people, okay? That things happen. We may not like to look at them. They happen. Okay? That's who we are. That's what we do. That's this part of ourselves. And we'll do it again and again and again because it's in our instinct and nature to say we don't do those things. But we do, which is why we'll do them again and again and again, precisely because we say we don't. This tendency to deny is one of our anchors. It's those that don't deny what they're capable of.
And I'll tell you something about healing and darkness. One of the faults of the New Age, if not its biggest one, is that it's based healing only on pe, on directing people to look at what others have done to them. "Oh, go find out who's tormented you. Oh, go find your victims." And then put it on a search and destroy mission. "Go get them. Go beat people up. Go scream about your childhood. Go scream about not having good parents and being an orphan and never being loved and yada yada yada yada." But never do they direct you to investigate how much you want to make them suffer. How much you fantasize about being vengeful and what you want to say to them if you ever got your hands on them. How much you want to ring their neck. How much you want to go after the people who've hurt you, humiliated you. Because the truth of it is, that's the source of your suffering. It's not who hurt you, it's who you want to hurt. And it drives people up the wall to realize that the people who hurt you have moved on. And one of the things, one of the greatest sufferings I see in people's eyes is when they say something to me like, "Can you believe that bastard married again?" But you're divorced from him. I don't care. He just found someone just like that. But, but you're divorced from him. But he just found, he replaced me just like that. And all they think about as the years go by is that he's gone on to be happy. And the rage, the rage is like the volcano that just went off in Iceland. The rage, the rage of being humiliated. This is a floodgate. A floodgate. A floodgate. Somebody who didn't get the inheritance. Look out. Look out. So, you can sit back and say, "I don't know what she's talking about. I'll find you. I'll find you on the map of vengeance." Oh, yes, I will. And when I do, you'll discover that's where your real suffering is. It is not on who hurt you. You dropped that long ago. It's on the sculpting of how to get them and on the hurt of them not caring and trying to figure out a way to get them to see you. "Can't you see what you've done to me?" And all the dramas you play in your head. And therefore, you go to support groups as your surrogates. "Why can't they see me?" Weep, weep, weep. And they are surrogates for them. And you replay the dramas again and again and again, hoping they'll see you. They're not going to show up. And one day, you got to give it up. Cut these strings. But so long as you do that, you are feeding an imbalance in time and space. And the idea of healing simply is unappealing. It's unappealing because you have to, what, what you are actually giving up is your relationship to suffering and pain. You've got to be kidding. I have to give up my fantasies about making them suffer. That's my only attachment to them is the psychic warfare I'm conducting. You've got to be kidding me. That is a no-go. I'm going to give up my pain, but I'm not giving up the psychic battlefield. It's not going to happen. That's where I live. That's where I formed my friendship, my social group. This is my life. The truth will set you free. The truth is, that's where I live. That's who I am. I have an appetite for vengeance, and I've grown to love it. But I make myself look like a victim. I got the clothes. I got the social group. I got the emergency number. I'm going to hit a pause button. I got all the excuses to not try hard because I got the illnesses that go with being rejected as a child. I just can't try that hard. I was abused. Hit a pause button. Am I relating to anybody? Have I got you? Just a little detox action.
Can I ask a question?
Anything. I met a woman. I have a friend, and I've been helping her, and she has all these signs of, you know, history and woundology and the victim stance, and I've been trying to help her, and we've shared time. Turns out she's a nun. She's alone. Um, and she used to live in the convent. Long story, but so we did great. We shared Teresa. We've shared hours of our time, and I see her blossoming and, you know, becoming happy because she was very lonely and so on. But then when I have to go to work, or when I step back a little from my own time, she gets, um, which is unusual, you wouldn't expect it, um, but she gets quite, I don't want to say nasty, but she'll send me an email and be like, "Oh, you know, it pisses me off that I can't see you today." And, D. So, my big question is, I'm sorry.
But my big question is, um, do I?
Yes.
Is, is it my problem that I'm getting or?
Yes. It was kind of suffocating.
Do I walk away or do I help?
Take a vow with her.
Okay, time out. She's lonely. So, she's already attached to you. The question is, what type of attachment? Number two, is it not, um, uh, okay. Yikes. There's a name for this. I'm going to be delicate. There's a name for this that they use within religious communities. It's called a passionate friend.
We've spoke. We, we speak openly. I'm okay. And it, if you are uncomfortable, then something's become inappropriate.
But am I being, is it my pride? Is it me? I don't mean to break the.
Okay. Yeah. Well, I need to get back to this.
Sorry.
And, and so this is becoming a tributary that's going the wrong way here. And we can continue this later. But what I can take from this that fits here, and then we'll discuss this later, is this, and, and that's the subject of truth between two people versus true. And that is a hard call. And that's the anguish of when someone sticks to something that's true versus you perceiving a higher truth. And that often destroys something because you might perceive, or they might perceive something in you that's emerging that you are not ready to see, that you are not ready to see in yourself, or that they are not ready to see in themselves. And this is where the grace of wisdom comes in, that you'll see where you, you just truly pray, "God, give me the grace of wisdom to figure out how to, another grace, counsel, how to speak here. I don't know how to speak here because this is a loaded gun, and I don't know how to speak here. Give me the grace of wisdom because this one, I don't want to hurt this person, but this relationship has become, this relationship, something I no longer can have in my life." And what you say is something along the lines of, "I think," and this is a word she'll understand, "it's time for a sabbatical."
It's time for.
Says that everyone's walked away on a.
Yeah. And that's, and just say, "I, I'm sorry about that, but that's not my crisis to repair that. I am not in your life to repair that. But perhaps I'm in your life to break that." And one of, and this is what I see as the reason for that. So reflect on that. We'll have a sabbatical, and I'll meet you six months from now. And that's it. Okay.
So, let's go back to this, this timeline. What I'd like you to do, uh, just as a part of homework, we're going to have two days after Santorini. We have time on the bus. We're not on the bus, on the boat.
We'll be on the boat.
Okay. What I would like you to do as I, I go through this in the next days, and just, you don't need me to go through all the chakras for you to do this, is to just note, either in your head, but truly do this, where you are losing power, where you are, know you're leaking, where you know you have, where you know there's an imbalance, where you actually know, but where you will compromise something in your life. Healing is absolutely possible.