Transcription
[Music] hi my loves. So I was bored, so I went blonde. I feel like it was one of the best decisions I've made in a long time. I am obsessed with my new hair. It gave me a full new personality, a new character that I didn't know I even had.
If you follow my Instagram, my TikTok, you already knew about this because I was posting about this so much already. But today, I'm here to talk to you about how to make people obsessed with you. I already have way too many people trying to be in my life, texting me, calling me, trying to be friends with me. My true circle is very small. I'm very selective with people, but every single day, my phone, my DM is blasted with messages asking for advice, asking to meet people, asking to become friends with them. There's so many men in my life, it's embarrassing. If I send them a dot, they are ready to fly me, to buy me anything I want, to listen to me, just so I can be next to them and spend time with them. People fly countries to just speak with me in real life because people are obsessed with me. And I'm not saying that from like a cocky perspective. I just know my aura. My aura is my sugar daddy. I know that I'm not for everyone, but once you taste my energy, you're just going to be thirsty. I'm like a cup of milk with butter and honey when you have a sore throat.
And I became that person by lacking that in my life. I moved to New York when I was 16 years old, alone, and I was so desperate at some point for people in my life, for relationships. But the more desperate you are, the less you get what you want. Want. So I decided to become that person. Instead of looking for someone who I can attach to, I decided to create that person. I decided to be that person and to give that to other people. And that's when the magic started.
When you think about that woman that everyone is obsessed with, you probably think about the woman that is drop-dead gorgeous, long legs, perfect body. She's flirty, she's super confident, untouchable, doesn't attach to people. She knows her worth, she's super hard to get, and she possesses that air of mystery. She flirts effortlessly with men. Now, where do you get that vision from? Hot supermodels, magazines, TV shows, movies. That is usually a character that women play. Playing, acting, being someone you are not is insanely exhausting. It will make you feel so lost and so confused at the end of the day. If you keep playing with people, with yourself, and playing the role that you are actually not, you.
If you think that being cold, being untouchable, being this oo mysterious woman is making people obsessed with you, you are very wrong, my love. Because I'm an Eastern European woman, and we have a plenty of women like that in my culture. You know who's obsessed with these kind of women? Traumatized, narcissistic, and emotionally unavailable men. Yay! Is that what you want, babe? At the end of the day, it doesn't matter a man or a woman, we just want to be loved. Love is warm. When you act cold, that does not attract people. That pushes them away. I've learned that lesson. It took me years to open my heart to people because I was so in my shell. You can ask my best friend, literally, she went through the whole journey with me. I went from being so cold and so distant from people to being the most loving, caring girl in the world. But because I am like that, I'm vulnerable when I'm around people. That's why I'm so selective with who I surround myself with.
Do you even realize that there's thousands of versions of you exist in people's heads? There's people that think that I'm mean. There's people that think that I'm a gold digger. There's people that think that I'm very kind and loving. There's people that think that I'm very rude and mean. There's people that think that I'm lazy. There's people that think that I'm their inspiration, girl. But what really matters is what version you have about yourself in your head. Because that's the real version of you. That is the only version of you that truly exists.
When I realized that, that blew my mind. Because I realized that I was not really treating myself nicely. I was not actually thinking about me so nicely. I spent almost a decade thinking about myself as if I'm a broke person, as there's something wrong with my head, with my body, because I was struggling with an eating disorder. And my problem consumed me so much that I felt that all this problem is me. I saw myself as that problem. And I could not see that this part of me that I hate, that I want to get rid of, first of all, was actually serving me and helping me and showing me that I'm doing something wrong in my life, that I'm not actually true to myself. And two, it was not all me. It was just a part of me. So the part of you that you hate the most, it's not all you. It's just a part of you. You, as a whole person, you are so diverse, you're so different, you're so interesting and so beautiful. You don't even realize that. But you show to people the version of you that you have in your head. If you think about yourself as this broken girl struggling with an eating disorder, that has a very bad self-esteem because she cannot control herself, that's how people will see you. That's how men will see you. That's the kind of people you will attract in your life.
How to change that and start seeing yourself as who you want yourself to be? Take a piece of paper, take a pen, and write down the version of you that you have right now, that you see. How you see yourself in details. And be honest with yourself. No one's going to see this piece of paper. But write down and see how you see yourself. Then, on the other side of the paper, write down the version that you want to see, that you want to live. Don't focus on materialistic things. All that is focus on the feelings. How you want to feel in your body, in your life. How do you want to wake up? How do you want to feel through this life? Girl, you don't even understand how incredible you are. How many parts of you that are so beautiful that you simply ignore. Stop waiting for people that will come to your life and will notice those parts of you. Start noticing it yourself. Start being your own biggest lover, supporter, cheerleader. Why? Because no one will ever be closer to you than you. And you know how you get that? By first of all, accepting that you are a woman. Accepting your true femininity. Not trying to change that. Not trying to run from it. We women in 2024, our goals are crazy. I want to be a millionaire. I want to have my own company. I want to achieve this, this, this. I can do everything myself. I don't need a man. I'm so cool. I'm so powerful. And so on. Like, this is not your true femininity. I didn't say you cannot have that. But if you keep living like this, I give you a few years, you're going to be so miserable. You're going to be so burned out. You're going to lose the more you're trying to prove to yourself as a woman that you're so strong, you don't need anyone else. You're going to build your career, you're you're going to make your own money through that masculine energy. The more miserable you're going to feel. Take my word.
How do you become truly happy as a woman and truly fulfilled as as a woman? Is through energy of creativity and excitement and having a hobby, being interested in something and you're growing, you're learning something that you absolutely love. Slow down, babe. Literally slow down. Your anxiety that you're trying to suppress by taking meds is not going away because there's something wrong with you. Your anxiety is the biggest signal that you're doing something wrong with your life, that you are literally not listening to your body, your signals in your life, that that you are trying to suppress and live your life the way you think is right for you. Seriously, why? Why you cannot be true to yourself? Why do you constantly choose to please other people and be nice to them, but not nice to yourself? Why? What did you do to yourself?
If you want people to be obsessed with you, people are obsessed with happy people. Those that don't seem to have problems in their life. Those that seem to do what they love in life and they're just happy and excited to live their life. People stick like a glue to people that they want to be, that they don't allow themselves to be. People stick to that energy because they want to be that energy. So instead of you sticking to someone else and depending on them, become that energy. Become that person. But in order to change, you need to slow down. You need to write down those things that you want to be, at least things that you are obsessed with in people and become that. God, my life changed when I realized that things that I am so obsessed with in a man are just the things that I want to have. I'll give you an example. Take me three, four years ago, I was falling so much for older men that would make me feel safe. Why? Because I was not making myself feel safe. Not physically safe, but I wasn't safe with myself, by myself. When I was staying alone at home, I felt like my mind and my body was constantly fighting. I did not make my inner child feel feel safe. So the moment I would go on a date with that kind of men, I'll be like, this is my husband now. Show me the same men, I'll run away as fast as I can. Why? Because I don't need to be saved. I don't need a safety blanket. By staying single for the past two years, I've learned how to make myself feel safe, financially, emotionally, mentally, in every aspect. That made me so much more confident.
Now, let's talk men. How do you make a man obsessed with you, sis? Egg doesn't swim to sperm. Never chase a man again. The last thing I want you to do is to play and to be this untouchable, unavailable woman when you want to be loved, when you're craving a real relationship. I don't want you to play. Please do not play with men. You don't need your ex. You don't need him. You are texting him because you're freaking bored, girl. Find a freaking hobby. Learn to entertain yourself. When you are in love with your life, when you live your life with excitement, you do interesting things, you go to art galleries, you do dance classes, you paint, you sing, whatever you do, you're trying different things, you experience emotions. When you live your days on autopilot and you do every single day same things, gosh, you hate your life. Who wants that? Tell me, who is obsessed with the person who is sitting at home all day long? Who is obsessed with a person that is living a boring life?
Girl, I really want you to wake up one day. I have goosebumps right now. I want you to wake up one day like I did and realize that it's not about finding people. It's it's you. And you, at the end of the day, you live for yourself to make yourself happy. When you make yourself happy, you will want to give that happiness to other people because you're so filled with it. You're like a star shining so bright, giving that energy to people. And that's how you attract people into your life. Not by trying to make people obsessed with you, but being so happy and so in love with your life, so that they look at you and they want to be a part of it.
Here's how you make him obsessed with you. Think about your crush right now, okay? The person that you would want to marry, you're like dream man, okay? If he doesn't exist, find a find a version of him online. I don't know. Imagine that you're already with him, that this is your partner, that you are dating. Would he choose you? Would he want to be next to you? Probably right away you started feeling like, and you said no. But how about you ask yourself a question? What kind of version of a woman would he want to have next to him? If you have high standards and you want to date that man, he has high standards too. If you truly want to be partners and choose each other, you need to be on the same level. Look, I found you a thing to do in your life. You have so much to work on. When I think about my crush, I'm like, wow, I really need to work on this, this, this, this, this. And and not to the point that I start feeling bad, but it's a journey. In order to be with that person, I choose to be soft every day. I choose to be patient. I choose to be classy and elegant because next to him, I will be representing him, and he will be representing me. I choose to be generous and caring because I'm sure that's how he is. That's how I would want him to be towards people. So if I require that in a person, that's how I should be myself. Girls, your expectations about men are pathetic. They're crazy sometimes. You all sit and just talk about how good you want him to be, how rich you want him to be, how successful he has to be. But are you already the version that he would choose tomorrow? If no, focus on that.
Well, that was it for today's video. And time truly flies when I talk to you guys, and I can talk to you for hours. I love this so much. I love our conversations. I'm so grateful if you're still here, if you watch this video till the end, and I truly, truly appreciate that you watch my videos. I will see you guys very soon in my next video. But before I say bye, remember that today is your day. [Music]