Transcription
Foreign, um, welcome. In today's discussion, I'm very privileged, honored, um, humbled to be part of this series on the glories of Lord Jagannath. We have had many wonderful speakers in this series, and my prostitute obey senses to each one of them. Thank you, dear Krishnaman and the Prabhu and Madhupathi Prabhu and all the senior Vaishnavas for kindly including me in this series.
I have been instructed to speak on the title of the internal mood and the internal reason of Jagannatha, and we have about 45 minutes for that. So, we will get started without further delay. Money, in his classes and his books, has explained very wonderfully the internal reasons of Rathyatra. He has explained the identity of Lord Jagannath. He's explained the reasons of the ecstatic symptoms of Lord Jagannath. And whatever little I can share from the prasadam plate of Srila Govinda Maharaja, I will try to speak something today. Otherwise, what is the value of my speech? What is the value? How, how can I comment anything about Lord Jagannath or the internal mood of Rathyatra? I am not born in Jagannath Puri and I am not son of a Panda from Jagannath Puri and I am not worship one of the pujaris. I'm the altar of Lord Jagannath. I'm a total outsider. But Srila Govinda Maharaj is an insider. Srila Govinda Maharaj is from the lotus feet of Lord Jagannath. So, therefore, whatever he has revealed in this world from that plate, I will try to share something very little. But all of you have to promise me that you will be very attentive because speaks Hari Katha like a waterfall. Srila Govinda Maharaja is like a rain shower. It comes from a very high height of realization and depth. So, all of us are like small fishes who are used to swimming in the swimming pool of material topics. So, we should be very attentive, all of us. And in that way, we will be able to appreciate something that Srila Govinda Maharaj is sharing.
Sri Krishna, as Vrindavan Bihari, performed very sweet, wonderful, loving pastimes in Vrindavan as the son of Mother Yashoda, as the brother of Balarama, as the friend of Madhumanga, and as the dear prananaath, life and soul of Srimati Radharani. Krishna performed beautiful pastimes in Vrindavan for 10 years and seven months. And then, through the agent of Akrura, he left Vrindavan and went to Mathura. Spent another 17 years in Mathura. Krishna was 28 years old when he went to Dwarka and he became the king. Krishna ruled Dwarka for another 100 years till the age of 125 and then wound up his pastimes, went back to the spiritual world.
But what happened during this, during this time frame is that Krishna went from Vrindavan to Mathura, in Mathura to Dwarka. But the Braja Gopis didn't go anywhere. The Brajabasis didn't go anywhere. Srimati Radharani didn't go anywhere. Mother Yashoda burned in the separation of her son every single day. Mother Yashoda would make freshly churned butter, yogurt, and wait for Krishna to come. She would wait from sunrise to sunset thinking, "Today Krishna will come and today you will say, 'Mama, I'm very hungry,' and I will give him fresh yogurt." Mother Yashoda would make the, the best sweets possible, thinking that today Krishna will come. And day after day after day after day, day after day after day, 100 years fast in separation. The Brajawasis were all alive and yet at the same time burning in slow fire. What is slow fire? When somebody jumps into fire, they will die in no time. But if you're in a fire which burns very slowly, you're feeling the heat, yeah, yet at the same time, life is not leaving the body. That is the most painful thing to be in. And that is where the Braja Gopis were. The Brajabasis were. More the love for Krishna, more is the attachment. More is the attachment, more is the pain. Brajabasis have maximum love for Krishna. In that, the Gopis have even higher love for Krishna. And in that, Srimati Radharani has most love for Krishna. So, who burns the most in separation? The Braja Gopis, especially Srimati Radharani. But Krishna's friends and Krishna's parents also burned so much in separation. It's inconceivable.
Srila Rupa Goswami writes that the trees in Vrindavan would have been burnt in the separation, in the fire of separation from Krishna. But thank God, they were kept alive by the constant tears of the Gopis. Because by the separation, there was fire in the heart. It is called vera agni. And the trees would have all burned to ashes by the separation from Krishna. But what kept the fire extinguished were the tears of the Gopis. They were crying so much in separation from Krishna that their tears were putting off the fire that was burning the lives of others. Krishna's friends became so mad in separation from Krishna, they didn't even realize that they were in separation from Krishna. In separation from Krishna, they were hallucinating Krishna everywhere. They were just seeing Krishna everywhere. And naturally, they were thinking, "This is Krishna." Can you imagine that level of madness where you are in separation from Krishna and you're seeing Krishna everywhere as a dream, as a hallucination, as a superimposition? And now you start believing that is actually true.
That is the situation that the friends were. Krishna, when he sends a letter through Uddhava, later he tells Uddhava, "Pacify my friends, please forgive me. Pacify my parents." "Don't pacify the Gopis. Pacify my parents, but don't pacify my Gopis. What do you tell them? They should be more sure. You just read my letter to them." And Uddhava said, "What if they don't get pacified?" Krishna said, "Don't worry. Just read the same letter again. Don't add your booty there. My words will pacify the Gopis. My letter will pacify the Gopis. You don't add your intelligence there. What Brihaspati taught you for people in general, it will not work for the Gopis. The Gopis are burning in separation from me, so only my words will help. And if it's not working, just repeat the same words again and again and again. But you don't add your intelligence. But for parents, yes, you can pacify." It's very interesting. Krishna tells Uddhava, "Pacify my parents and read my letter to the Gopis." But what about the friends? He doesn't tell anything about the friends because the friends don't feel separation. Why? Because they felt so much separation that they are now seeing Krishna everywhere and they think now that Krishna is actually real and now they're not feeling any separation. Can you imagine the madness? Really amazing, right? This is Braja Rasa. This is Vrindavan.
Uddhava had learned everything from his teacher, but he had not learned about Vrindavan. Even his teacher Brihaspati had not learned about Vrindavan. Therefore, Krishna thought, "I will give higher education. I will give more studies, more preparation to." And he sent him to Vrindavan, not to pacify the Gopis, but to learn from the Gopis. So, in, in Vrindavan, they say that went as a teacher and came as a student. He went to teach the Gopis, but ended up becoming their student. He became purified. And what did the Gopis do? They played the murder doom off. Later, who came to Vrindavan with the desire to teach the Gopis? Lifetime after lifetime, I pray, may I become a small blade of grass where on the other side of the Yamuna? Why? So that when the visitors into Vrindavan come in, they wipe their feet on my head and then they enter Vrindavan. Let me be a blade of grass in the entrance of Vrindavan, so that every Brajabasi, every personality who's in Vrindavan has to enter or exit, they will wipe their feet on my head. Uddhava said, "Being the disciple of Brihaspati, I am the minister outside Vrindavan, but this is not satisfying me. May I become a small blade of grass so that the dust from the lotus feet of the Gopis always remains on my head? I don't want anything after lifetime. And may I hear the voice of Srimati Radharani and the dust lotus feet of the Gopis. There's nothing else I want. I want it on my head. May I have a small atom of that devotion in my heart? I don't have any other desire." This is how exalted Vrindavan is.
So, Krishna left to Vrindavan and he went to Mathura and Dwarka. But the Brajabasis were burning 100 years in separation with absolutely no option. And naturally, in the Bhagavad Gita, "As the devotees approach me, I will reciprocate." But Krishna cannot reciprocate to the Gopis because the Gopis' love is unlimited with unlimited devotion. And Krishna does not have so much devotion. He is God, but one thing that he doesn't have is devotion for himself. Krishna does not have love for himself. He has love for his devotees. And the devotees, I love for him. The love that the Gopis have, the Brajabasis have, Srimati Radharani has, is unlimited. It's like an ocean. Krishna cannot reciprocate. So, therefore, Kaviraj Goswami says, "Krishna had taken, 'I will reciprocate the way the devotee approaches me, I will reciprocate.' But by the love of the Gopis, what happened? Krishna's promise was broken." And Krishna, 311 trillion 40 billion years, still I will not be able to reciprocate. Why? Because I will reciprocate as Bhagavan. I will not feel a devotion in my heart as a devotee. So, how can I reciprocate without love of Godhead? Without having love that the devotees have in their heart? My life is waste. My life is wasted. He feels, "I have no frame." And then he chases more, praying more love for Krishna. You see, any pure Vaishnava, they naturally have so much love. And the quality of Krishna prema is such that the more you have it, the person feels, "I don't have it." Any material thing, little bit the person has, he will act as if he has more than what he has. Little bit of knowledge, and he will act as if he has more knowledge than what he has. Little bit of wealth, and he will act as if he has more wealth than what he actually has. Little bit of beauty, and he will think that he, he or she will think that they have become very beautiful. But Bhakti is such that the more the person has it, is like the fruits on a tree. The more there are fruits on the tree, the tree naturally bends by the weight of those fruits. So, more there is devotion in the heart, the living entity bends in humility and thinks, "I have no fruit. I have no devotion." So, Krishna's telling the Gopis, "Even in a lifetime of Brahma, I cannot receive it because I don't have this love and I don't know what to do. I can only accept, accept, accept, accept. But I am not able to give that much. I wish I can also taste devotion." Krishna is telling the Gopis, "You see, in your plate, if you have rotis, rice, and chaas, and in the neighbor's plate, they have roti, sabji, dal, rice, chaas, and sweet, where will your mind go? Your mind will not think about the rotis of the dal, rice, and chaas that you have. It will think of the sweet that you didn't get, right? And where, where are we getting this idea from? From Sri Krishna. He's Rasa Raj. He tastes all rasas, but still, he's feeling abha, he's still feeling a lack in his heart about the rasa that he's not."
So, when Krishna was in Dwarka, and the Gopis are burning in separation from Krishna in Vrindavan, Krishna is having everything, but he's still missing the Gopis and the Brajabasis. So, even as Dwarkadhish, when he's twisting and turning and turning sides and rolling on the bed in the middle of his night, he's not getting sleep because sometimes he's saying, he's calling out to all the friends and he's calling out to his parents. And sometimes he's calling out to the names of the cows. Rukmini and Satyabhama are thinking that he's having queens in Dwarka and he's still missing the cows of Vrindavan. So, what is this Vrindavan so special? And sometimes Krishna would roll on the bed. 108 queens are thinking, "Who is this? Who is this?" And if Krishna tries to explain, he will not be able to explain because he says, "Love of God is such that you cannot explain." Now, we in this world, if we are told to explain what is rasgulla, you may explain how it looks, and you may be able to explain how to make it. But can you explain the taste to somebody who has never tasted? There are no words. What will you explain? How can you explain? We can say it is sweet. What else? Now, somebody will say, "What is that sweet meat?" What can we explain? We will not be able to. What to speak of the separation of the Gopis from Krishna in pure love of Godhead, how can it be explained? Even God cannot explain. Chaitanya describes, even Ananta Shesh with millions and millions of hoods for all times to come cannot explain.
So, in that Dwarka, Krishna used to miss Vrindavan. I want to ask all of you a question, dear devotees. When you see the reflection of a mango, what do you remember? You remember a mango, right? But when you see a mango, do you miss the reflection? You don't even remember the reflection, right? So, similarly, when Krishna is in Vrindavan, which is like the mango, he doesn't miss the reflection, which is Dwarka. When Krishna is in Vrindavan, tasting the actual mango, he doesn't miss the reflection, which is Dwarka. But when he's in Dwarka, seeing the reflection of devotion, of the mango, being in Dwarka, his body is in Dwarka, his heart is in love.
So, one time, as Krishna was in Dwarka and he fainted, unconscious, tears streaming from his eyes, and Krishna has fainted. And as Krishna fainted, there's nobody around. Mysteriously, Narada Muni comes to the scene. Narada Muni came to the scene and he saw, he had his veena, he was chanting, "Narada, Narada, Krishna, he's chanting Radharani's name and has fallen in separation. Now, what to do?" Narada was thinking, "I hope there is some help that will come." Mysteriously, at that time, Uddhava also also came to the scene. And now Narada and Uddhava both were looking at Krishna, who's fallen unconscious, and they were both thinking, "How to wake this Krishna up?" Krishna seems to be in very deep separation, pangs of anxiety and separation. Remembering now, how to revive him? Narada and Uddhava starts speaking and they say, "At that time, I think we should do like this. I think we should do like that." And as they're speaking, one more personality comes, Krishna's dear brother. So, here we have now three personalities, all three of them looking at Krishna, who has followed unconscious and separation from Radharani. And all three of them are thinking, "How to wake Krishna up?" At that time, Uddhava tells Narada Muni, "Why don't you sing the names of Radharani into the ears of Krishna? Why don't you glorify Vrindavan with very beautiful poetry and songs and verses, and Krishna will wake up?" When he said that, "That's a very good idea. But however, as soon as he wakes up, he will want to run to Vrindavan. He will want to run to Vrindavan. So, what to do? He will wake up and he will say, 'Am I in Vrindavan?'" So, Narada Muni says, "I am ready to sing the glories of Vrindavan, but on a condition. We should keep a chariot ready for him, and Krishna's chariot driver, Daruka, should also be there, ready as a chariot driver, as the Sarathi. So, I will sing the glories of Vrindavan, the glories of the Gopis, the glories of Radharani, and Krishna will wake up from his separation." Krishna has fainted, he will get up and then he will say, "Where is Vrindavan? Where is Vrindavan?" Then we can tell him, "Let's put him on the chariot. The chariot is ready, and you can rush to Vrindavan." Uddhava said, "That's a very good idea. We can keep the chariot ready. But however, I have a very big concern. And the concern is, said in the Bhagavad Gita, 'My abode is such that once you go, you will never return.' And that is same for him also. So, Uddhava says, 'We can put him on the chariot and send him to Vrindavan. But once he goes to Vrindavan and he sees Giriraj Govardhan, and he sees Yamuna, and he sees all the Gopis and the Gopas and the cows and the calves and the trees and the dust of Braj, and when he sees Nanda and Yashoda, and he sees Lalita and Vishakha, and he sees Srimati Radhika, do you think Krishna is going to leave all of that and leave Vrindavan and come back to Dwarka and rule as the king? Impossible.' So, Uddhava says, 'Yes, we should prepare a chariot and let him go to Vrindavan. But the problem is, if he goes there, he will not come back. He will not come back.' So, what to do?"
So, Narada Muni says, "Yes. So, what we should do is, Uddhava, you run to Vrindavan first. You go to Vrindavan and tell all the Brajabasis not to cry. Tell the Brajabasis to have a very smiling atmosphere, very smiling environment, smiling faces. And tell them that Krishna is coming in a chariot." So, what? So, Narada Muni is making these plans. I hope everyone's following the story. Narada Muni is saying, "Okay, I will sing some song glorifying Vrindavan and wake Krishna up. But then Krishna has to go to Vrindavan. So, we'll have the chariot ready. But then the problem is, if he goes, then he will not return. So, somebody has to go to set the scene before Krishna comes." So, Narada Muni tells Uddhava, "You go first to Vrindavan and pacify everybody and tell nobody should cry. Krishna is coming. Give him the best treatment possible so that then, after that, Krishna meets all of them and then he can come out." Uddhava says, "This sounds like a very good idea. But I am the last person who should be given the service to go and pacify them. Why? I said, because I lived in Vrindavan for 11 months and I could not pacify the Gopis. I could not pacify them in 11 long months. What am I going to do in one visit?" Narada Muni said, "Why couldn't you pacify?" So, Uddhava speaks the whole story of his going to Vrindavan. And Uddhava mentions that when I went there, I tried to tell the Gopis to think of Krishna, think of Krishna, all the problems will go away. And the Gopis told us, "Think of Krishna and all problems will go away? Well, our problem is we are thinking of Krishna. Our mind is not leaving Krishna. The problem for others is their mind is not focusing on Krishna, and therefore they do yoga so that they can focus their mind on Krishna. Our problem is we are ready to do yoga to forget Krishna because the more we remember him, the more we are troubled." Surdas ji has written a very beautiful Braj Bhasha bud where Uddhava comes and tells the Gopis, "You meditate on Krishna." And the Gopis tell Uddhava, "Meditate? You need the mind. With which mind should we focus on Krishna? Because as soon as Krishna left, our mind went with him. So, now we don't have a mind of our own. So, now with which mind should we meditate on Krishna?" In Braja, the Gopis, we don't have like 10, 20, 30 different types of mind. With one mind, we will, the mind will go with Krishna. With another mind, we will take care of our family. With the third mind, we'll fill water from the Yamuna. With the fourth mind, we'll take care of our kids. With the fifth mind, we'll clean our home. With the sixth mind, we'll meditate on Krishna. We don't have different minds like this. We just have one mind, and that mind went with Krishna when Krishna left Vrindavan. Which means we are so absorbed now. With which mind should be focused on Krishna? Our lives have become like the body without a head.
Yoga means yoga, but it also means meeting. Yoga your Lord Krishna is Yogeshwar, the Lord of meeting. Then why is he sending you to create more yoga, separation? Our lives have become like a body without a head.
So, in this way, Uddhava tells Narada Muni, "If somebody is crying in this world, you can tell them, 'Stop crying. In separation, it is all material. It is all temporary. Death is certain for one who is born. Leaving is certain for one who comes, right? Meeting and separation are two sides of this material world. Don't cry.' You can say all that to somebody who's crying for material things. But for somebody who's crying for Krishna, what do you tell them? Stop crying? Do you tell them it is material? Do you tell them it is temporary? It is the nature of the soul to cry for God in separation and in love." Uddhava, I initially told them, "Stop crying." But then I started crying looking at them because they have so much love. And it is the nature of devotion to cry for one's Lord. I felt like telling them, "Continue to cry. Cry more because it is the nature of the soul to cry for Krishna." So, what do I do? Do I tell them to cry more, or do I tell them to stop crying? If I tell them to cry more, I am guilty of making them cry. And if I tell them to stop crying, I am guilty of stopping them in expressing, expressing their love for God. Instead of crying for a lost cell phone or crying for some money that is lost, it is a million times better to cry for Krishna in separation, is it not? And that is the nature of the soul.
So, Uddhava has told Narada Muni, "It's a very bad idea. I feel like following your instruction by going to Vrindavan and pacifying Brajabasis. But if I go, you know, they will not believe me because I told them I will bring Krishna and I stayed 11 months there and Krishna has still not gone back. They will think I am the one making the mistakes. So, they will not believe me. I am the person who can't go." So, throughout all this, Narada Muni is listening to Uddhava. Then he looks at Balarama and he tells Balarama, "Why don't you go to Vrindavan?" Uddhava cannot go, but you go. Is everybody understanding? So, the plan is, Krishna is painted. So, Narada Muni will sing, wake Krishna up through songs glorifying Vrindavan. Then Krishna will sit on the chariot and go to Vrindavan. But if he goes, he will not come back. So, somebody has to go to set the scene before Krishna comes. So, Narada Muni tells Balarama, "Why don't you go?" Balarama said, "Of course, that's a very, very good idea. I should definitely go. But can I tell you something? If I go and see my parents cry, if I go and see Vrindavan in tears, forget about bringing Krishna out, even I will not feel like leaving Vrindavan. I will feel like living there only. I will remember all the pots of butter that we broke together. I will remember all the trees that we climbed together." Balarama said, "If Uddhava did not grow up in Vrindavan and he still feels so much, imagine me. I grew up in Vrindavan with Krishna." He said, "I lived two months in Vrindavan and I also told the Brajabasis. In fact, I told Maya Yashoda, I told Nanda Baba, I told the Gopis, I told the cows and calves, 'I will go and bring Krishna very soon.'" He said, "Then what happened?" Balarama said, "I left Vrindavan, came to Krishna, and I told him so much, 'Let's go back.'" Krishna said, "I have so many duties here. How can I go?" And Balarama said, "In childhood, Krishna used to listen to me. But now he's become a king, he doesn't listen to me anymore." So, I tried telling him, but Krishna did not go to Vrindavan. But the Brajabasis will not know that. They will think that I did not tell Krishna. So, if I go to Vrindavan, the Brajabasis will not feel like talking to me because they will think, 'Two months you stayed here, you saw what yours, and you promised you will bring Krishna. He's an outsider. He's a friend. But you're his brother. You should be able to convince. But you didn't.' So, Balarama said, "I would love to go and pacify, but I don't think I am the right choice."
At that time, Narada Muni thinks, "Who else can go? I can't go because I have to be here to sing. Uddhava cannot go. Balarama cannot go. So, who can go?" At that time, Subhadra Devi comes in Dwarka in that same setting where Balarama and Uddhava and Narada Muni are speaking about Krishna. So, Subhadra Devi comes there and she says, "What is the concern?" And they explain the whole situation. So, Subhadra Devi said, "No problem. I will go. And I have an upper hand. I have an advantage. What is the advantage? I have never been. So, they will believe me. It's the first time Uddhava and Balarama have had a past experience and they said they will bring Krishna, but they couldn't. So, I can go. And one more advantage is, being in a feminine body, the Gopis will trust me more. I will tell the Gopis, 'You know, these men, don't believe them. Akrura was a man, Uddhava is a man, Balarama is a man, Krishna is a man. Don't listen to them.' So, Subhadra Devi said, 'I will tell the Gopis, I will wipe their tears and I will tell them, I understand. I have a feminine heart. I understand. Trust me, Krishna is coming.' And Subhadra said, 'I can even jump on the lap of Mother Yashoda and embrace her and pacify her, which Uddhava may not be able to.' So, Subhadra Devi said, 'I will go. Just set a nice chariot for me and I will go.'" So, Narada Muni instructed one more chariot. One chariot for Krishna with Daruka was being prepared already. So, he ordered for one more chariot to be made for Subhadra. When Subhadra Devi got ready, Balarama said, "Well, I have no problem going to Vrindavan. It's just that I could not go alone. But if Subhadra is going, then I can go with her as her brother. So, then she can do the talking, and I will stand there." So, Narada Muni said, "Okay, we will prepare another chariot for Balarama, and both of you go and pacify."
At that time, Subhadra Devi said something interesting. She said, "When we go to Vrindavan, the Brajabasis will ask, 'Why is it that Subhadra is reaching Vrindavan first? Where is Balarama?' And if Balarama comes later, they will ask, 'Where is Krishna? All brothers and sisters, why they are not coming together?' They will ask." So, at that time, so what are they saying? "I will say Krishna is the king. So, as he's coming through the chariot, all the different other kings and all the servants, they're all pausing at different places, offering arati and singing different songs and putting different rangoli and there's kirtan welcoming him. So, Krishna and Balarama, they are taking little time. They are reciprocating with everyone and they are coming. When I am Subhadra, I can just come." So, Subhadra Devi told Balarama that "I will say like that." Balarama said, "I can come with you. No problem. We can say that we came first. Krishna, as the king, he's coming later." The Subhadra Devi said, "Okay. So, we all set out together at the same time. Is the script? But Krishna is getting delayed. Why? Because everyone is singing songs and welcoming him on the way from Dwarka to Vrindavan. But actually, that's not the reason. The reason is, they need time to revive Krishna from his ecstasy."
So, in this way, Balarama and Subhadra Devi, they set out in their chariots. Balarama reaches first because, of course, his chariot driver was a little faster. So, Balarama reaches Vrindavan first. And then Subhadra reaches Vrindavan. What is happening here? Uddhava and Narada Muni are looking at Krishna. And Uddhava tells Narada, "Now that they have set off, you start singing." Narada Muni starts to sing. And as Narada Muni starts to sing, Krishna, who had fainted, woke up like a spring. And he stood like this, in a threefold bending form, in Dwarka. Now, if you see in Dwarka, Krishna never stands in a three-fold bending form. This trivanga form is the specialty of Vrindavan. Flute is a specialty of Vrindavan. Peacock feather is a specialty of Vrindavan. Pitambar, yellow dhoti, specialty of Vrindavan. So, Dwarka Krishna has armor. He has, you know, a lot of jewels and a lot of necklaces. And he's standing straight. There's no flute and no peacock feather. But in Dwarka, Krishna wakes up and he doesn't know he's in Dwarka. So, he's standing in a threefold bending form. There's no flute in his hand. There's no peacock feather. And he's standing in a three-fold bending form. And Krishna is looking at Narada and Uddhava and he says, "What are both of you doing in Vrindavan? When did you come to Vrindavan?" They whisper to each other that Krishna still thinks he's in Vrindavan. Krishna tells, "Where's my flute?" Then he touches, he said, "Where is my peacock feather?" Then he looks at Narada and Uddhava and he asks them, "Am I dreaming that I am in Dwarka while I'm actually in Vrindavan? Or am I actually in Dwarka and dreaming that I am in Vrindavan? Which out of the two am I actually in Vrindavan dreaming that I'm in Dwarka? Or am I in Dwarka dreaming that I'm in Vrindavan?" So, Narada Muni and Uddhava say, "Actually, you're in Dwarka and you're remembering Vrindavan." Krishna said, "I want to go to Vrindavan. I cannot live outside Vrindavan. I don't know how I came here. I don't know why I came here. I miss my family. I miss my Vrindavan. I miss Mother Yashoda. I miss Srimati Radharani. I miss every tree of Vrindavan." Embraced Krishna and said, "Don't worry, Krishna. Look, the chariot is ready. Daruka as your chariot driver is sitting ready. You just jump onto the chariot and he will drive you faster than the wind back to Vrindavan." Krishna tries running to the chariot, but he cannot because he's intoxicated. Means liquor, alcohol. When someone is drunk through alcohol, they don't know where they are, what they're doing, and they're just moving. They can't even walk straight. So, Krishna is Radha madira, that form, who's intoxicated by the transcendental intoxicant called separation from Srimati Radharani. So, as a result of which, because he's completely drunk in that frame, Krishna could not even walk from that place to his chariot. And he was moving like this, his head was spinning and moving, and he could not walk properly. And Uddhava on one side, and Narada Muni on the other, they were holding. And Krishna was moving like this, completely drunk by Radha Rasa. He was intoxicated by the intoxicant called. Is everybody understanding? It's not actual madira. It's not actual alcohol. It's the alcohol. It is the madira of Krishna prema, or Radha prema. And they took Krishna as he was moving back and forth. Narada on one side, Uddhava on the other. They held Krishna and took him to the chariot. And as Krishna sat on the chariot, he looked at Daruka and said, "Faster than the wind." And Daruka said, "My Lord, I will go faster than the mind, which is faster than the wind." And he drove very fast. And Krishna's on the chariot with Daruka, going from Dwarka to Vrindavan. But what is happening in Vrindavan by then? Do we all want to know? Balarama reached first. Subhadra Devi reached next. And mysteriously, by the planning of Vrinda Devi, Tulsi Devi, Vrinda Devi, who is the director of all the pastimes, she directed Balarama and Subhadra straight to Nidhivan, the place of Radha and Krishna's sweet loving dancing and singing in Vrindavan. They went straight there. And what was the scene like? The whole of Vrindavan was weeping and crying. They were hitting their chest and hitting their, hitting the ground, crying with loud cries. It looked like the rumbling in the stomach of the ocean. Imagine the ocean, if it has stomach problems, and this growling sound coming from the stomach of the ocean. Vrindavan is like the ocean of rasa, and the stomach from the deepest part of that Nidhivan, there was the grumbling sound, the rumbling sound of tears. And what was the scene like? The whole of Vrindavan had come there, and they had surrounded Srimati Radharani. Srimati Radharani was on the verge of leaving her body in separation from Krishna. And the whole of Vrindavan had come to see the departure of Srimati Radhika. There was Srimati Radharani laying down on the dust of Nidhivan, and her head was in the palms of Lalita Sakhi. Vishakha Sakhi was chanting the names of Krishna in the ear. Chitra Sakhi was fanning Radharani. Ranga Devi and Sudevi, the two Sakhis, were massaging her lotus feet. Indulekha Sakhi was holding a swab of cotton on her nose to see if the breathing is still on. And in this way, all the Sakhis like Champakalata Sakhi was applying Chandan all over her body to cool down from the heat of separation from Krishna. Balarama looked at this. Subhadra Devi looked at this. And as they were looking at this love of Vrindavan, their body was getting transformed by the symptoms of ecstasy. All these symptoms were seen in the body of Balarama and Subhadra. What were these symptoms? Tears streaming from their eyes, hair standing on end, voice choking with a lump of emotion in the throat, teeth chattering, full body sweating, tears from the eyes and sweating perspiration all over their body. Color had transformed, vivarnya, there was a discoloration of the skin. The body was melting. The eyes went big. The hands went inside. And there was a very big smile and astonishment looking at what is happening. Balarama and Subhadra took the forms that you see on the altar of Jagannath. Their eyes were big and hands went inside, looking at the scene of Srimati Radharani leaving her body in separation from Krishna, and the whole of Vrindavan coming there.
And what happened? As this pastime was being described and witnessed, Abhimanyu came running. Not the Abhimanyu of Mahabharata, this is Abhimanyu Ghosh, the husband of Radharani, the supposed husband of Radharani. He came and he offered obeisances to Radharani and he took dust from her lotus feet on his head. And he said, "I have never touched Radharani, but today for the first time, I will take dust from her lotus feet on my head. I will touch her feet to get some dust." Abhimanyu said, "I want to pronounce the eternal secret which I have been kept hiding in my heart. What is that?" He said, "I am a pujari of Katyayani Devi, and she manifested as Purnamasi in Vrindavan. Katyayani Devi and Purnamasi Devi gave me the service of getting married to Radharani. She told Vrinda Devi to get us married." Why Purnamasi Devi? Because Abhimanyu Ghosh is saying, "I am the pujari and my Ishta Devi is Purnamasi. Purnamasi instructed me, 'You get married to Radharani, and your service is, try to stop her from eating Krishna.' Because if she freely meets Krishna, it is wonderful. But if you stop her from meeting Krishna, then her desperation and love for Krishna in separation will be seen by everyone." Purnamasi gave the example, "If you make an elephant run, no problem. Everybody will see the greatness of the elephant. But if you chain the elephant with iron chains, everybody will see the strength of the elephant and breaking the iron chains as the elephant runs, breaking the chains." So, Radharani is like the love of Raja Rani for Krishna is like an elephant. If you just let go, everybody will seek Radharani meet Krishna. But Abhimanyu, your service is to hold back Radharani like the iron chains. So, everyone will see the elephant of her love break through the iron chains of your stopping to go and meet Krishna. Is everybody understanding? Radharani freely meeting Krishna is like drinking lassi. It is sweet. But Abhimanyu trying to stop Radharani is like drinking chaas. There's a lot of masala there. So, Abhimanyu's announced and proclaimed to everyone that "I did this as service. Please note, Radharani is completely chased to Krishna. Krishna is our actual husband. And I just did this as service. And whom I married, she is Chhaya Radha, not the actual Radha." And he gave the example, "Just like Ravana kidnapped Sita, but not the actual Sita, just Chhaya Sita, just the shadow of Sita. The actual Sita is always with Rama." Therefore, before Radharani departs, I want to make this announcement in Vrindavan." Abhimanyu made announcement. He thought Radharani was actually departing. He said, "Before she departs, I want to make this announcement that just like Sita always belongs to Rama, Radharani always belongs to Krishna. And I, as Ravana, was just married, I just married a Chhaya Radha as service that was given to me by my Ishta Devi. But I want to make this announcement." And at that point, his sister also came, Kritila, who's the sister-in-law of Radharani. And she said, "Oh, even I want to make a confession, an announcement." But before she made that, she offered obeisances to Radharani and she took dust from Radharani's lotus feet and filled her mangalsutra from the dust of Radharani's lotus feet. And what did Kritila announce? Kritila said, "I have always been finding fault with Radharani. I am like an insect, and Radharani is like a palace. If you send an insect inside a palace, what happens? It will still find holes. An insect will never be happy in a palace. It will still try to find some cracks and some holes and where it can go and live." So, Kritila said, "Radharani is like a palace made out of one diamond, which means there are no cracks and there are no holes. But I am like an insect. Even in the palace of Radharani's personality, I am like an insect. I'm trying to find some faults. There are no faults, but I'm trying to find something." Kritila said, "I apologize. I apologize in front of everyone for my mistake. And then she said, "I want to say one more thing. I want to say a story which nobody knows." So, everyone's eager now. Kritila said, "One time, Krishna fell ill and his body was hot with fever. So, when the doctor came and saw Krishna's body, the doctor said, 'Oh, there is only one way to cure Krishna. If he sprinkled with the waters of Yamuna water, he will be fine.' So, Kritila said, 'Okay, I will go and get it immediately. I'll go and get it.' The doctor said, 'No, there is a condition for that. The condition is, you have to get it in a pot which has 100 holes. The pot will be filled with 100 holes. You have to put that pot in the Yamuna and bring the water, and not one drop should spill out with that water from the Yamuna, which has been caught by a pot with 100 holes. If that water is sprinkled on Krishna, then it is possible.' Kritila said, 'I will try.' The doctor said, 'There is a condition. Only the lady who has first-class character and spotless chastity to her husband can do this. Nobody else can.' Kritila announced in front of everyone, 'I went to the Yamuna, and the pot had 100 holes, and I tried my best, and still, it, no, it did not fill. And even if it filled, the water all seeped out. Which means I don't have as much love and chastity and purity in character like how it's supposed to be expected.' So, then finally, Radharani went, and she filled up that pot. Although it had 100 holes, she filled it up and she got it without one drop getting out. And that water of Yamuna from that pot, which Radharani got, although it had 100 holes, when Krishna was sprinkled with that water, Krishna woke up and he was healthy. Kritila said, 'I tried to hide this pastime because it was showing Radharani in good light. But now that Radharani is departing, I wanted to announce to the whole world, there is absolutely not one speck of fault in Radharani's personality. She is completely pure and chaste to Krishna. Therefore, everyone please worship Radharani.'"
Said, as this was happening, Balarama and Subhadra on either side, their ecstasy is going, and they're trembling so much listening to this Hari Katha, the glories of Radharani. And their eyes are becoming bigger and bigger, and hands are going inside and inside, and there's a big smile. And at that time, finally Chandravalli also came, Radharani's competitor. And she offered obeisances at the largest feet of Radharani and took all the dust on her head again like sindhur. And Chandravalli announced, "Actually, Krishna has come to meet me many times. And I will tell you the reason why." Chandravalli said, "Krishna has so much affection for Radharani that wherever Krishna sees, he only sees the face of Radha. So, even when he saw me, he looked at me thinking that I was Radharani because in my ishta of my face, he saw the face of Radharani. And he came and met me, and he saw closely, and he understood it was not Radharani, and then he left." So, Chandravalli said, "Actually, Krishna comes and meets me only because he thinks I am Radharani. And when he realizes, he says he leaves." Chandravalli said, "When Krishna is with Radharani, he never says. But when he comes to me, he thinks it's. When he realizes it is not Radharani, he which means she is as beautiful as millions of moons. But Chandravalli is not Radha. Radha means the greatest worshiper. Chandravalli is not the greatest worshiper."
So, in this way, everybody offered their obeisances. And Radharani was still breathing heavy in separation from Krishna. By then, Krishna's chariot reached Nidhivan by the fast galloping of the horses of Krishna's chariot. And Krishna reached Nidhivan. And as Krishna reached Nidhivan, Vishakha Sakhi chanted in the ears of Radha, "Krishna has arrived. Please open your eyes." Krishna got off the chariot. And Radharani's eyes opened. And as Krishna looked at Radharani, and Radharani looked at Krishna, Krishna fainted. And as now Krishna fainted, Radharani is awake. Now the whole plan twists. Now, till now, it was Krishna is coming to wake Radharani up. But now Krishna has fainted. Now what to do? Lalita and Vishakha looking at Radharani, "What to do?" Lalita Sakhi said, "I don't know what to do." Radharani said, "You do something. Make arrangements so that the breeze of Vrindavan will touch my body and then touch Krishna's body. Then Krishna, the fragrance of my dress, and the fragrance of my flower garland, and the fragrance of my body, when it gets into the nostrils of Krishna, Krishna will wake up. And you sit next to Krishna's ear and you chant my names. You chant Radhanam into the ears of Krishna." When Lalita Sakhi arranged for the breeze of Vrindavan to take the fragrance of Radha's complexion into the nostrils of Krishna, and Vishakha Sakhi started chanting the name of Radha into the ears of Krishna, Krishna immediately startled up and woke up. And there was Radharani sitting. And then there was Krishna sitting. Both of them looking at each other. The whole of Vrindavan was around. And at that time, by the meeting of Radha-Krishna's beautiful praying, they looked at each other and they said, "It seems that we never separated. It seems that these Dwarka and Mathura were just bad dreams. It seems that there was no separation, absolutely." And as Radha and Krishna met, everybody performed the Arati of Radha and Krishna. It was Nidhivan, and it was four o'clock in the morning. All night had passed in this. At four o'clock in the morning, everybody assembled in the pitch darkness, keeping Radha and Krishna on a very big jeweled throne. And as Radha and Krishna were sitting, Lalita Sakhi offered the Arati. Vishakha Sakhi started singing the ragas. And everybody with kartal and mridanga and singing and dancing, they were worshipping and worshipping Radha and Krishna. Dear devotees, this is Mangala Arati. The meeting of Radha and Krishna after so much separation. And all the devotees keep them on the throne, on the altar of Nidhivan, in the darkness of the night, in Vrindavan. And everyone is worshipping them, singing and dancing for their pleasure. What is Mangala Arati? What is Mangala? What is auspicious? The meeting of Radha and Krishna after separation. This is Mangala. So, remembering this, we wake up and we worship Radha and Krishna. And this is the tradition Prabhupada gave us through Guru Parampara. How beautiful, isn't it? How beautiful.
And then, after worshipping Radha and Krishna, Krishna told Radharani, "Please forgive me for leaving you. I went out to do my services and my duties. You can ask for a boon, and I will give it to you." Radharani said, "This mood of separation that we have experienced, this mood of separation, these forms of separation that we have witnessed, I want the whole world to witness this." Krishna said, "I give you my word. This form of mine as Jagannath, with eyes dilated because looking at Radharani, even Krishna's hands went inside, his eyes became big, and he had a big smile like Balarama and Subhadra." Krishna said, "This form of mine in separation from you, I will manifest in Jagannath Puri. And because my brother and my sister also helped me in this regard, coming back to Vrindavan, I will sit on the altar with them, and we will come out in chariots, representing the same mood coming from the Dwarka-Vrindavan. And because Balarama reached first, and Subhadra reached next, and then I reached Vrindavan, in Jagannath Rathyatra also, Balarama will come out first, and then Subhadra Devi, and then Jagannath." [Laughter] Krishna said, "Because I found it difficult to get onto the chariot, and Narada Muni and Uddhava were taking me as I was swinging in Radha Rasa, even as Jagannath, I will be moving back and forth as I get onto the chariot. And the Pandas will take me, representing Narada and Uddhava. They will take me to the chariot. And because Balarama, Subhadra, and myself, we have become stunned like wood, those deities will be carved out of wood. And because all three of us are floating in the ocean of Radha Prem, we will manifest in the form of three logs of wood floating in the waves of the ocean of Jagannath Puri. We will take the form of wood floating in the waves of Radha Prem, the ocean. And then Krishna promised Radharani, 'Your form in separation from me, my form in separation from you, as Jagannath, the whole world will see. And in Dwarka, they have seen. But your form in separation from me, nobody has seen. In Nidhivan, I will take this form, I will take this complexion, I will take this mood. And as Chaitanya Mahaprabhu, I will display this in front of the whole world.' And in the Rathyatra, when Jagannath will be on the altar, and Mahaprabhu will be dancing, Krishna represented and told Radharani, 'What will that mean? It will mean our meeting in Vrindavan, where Chaitanya Mahaprabhu will be the mood of Radha, and Jagannath on the chariot with Baladeva and Subhadra will represent Krishna. And when the eyes of Mahaprabhu, dancing in front of Jagannath, will meet with the eyes of Jagannath, Mahaprabhu's eyes meeting the eyes of Jagannath, it is the eyes of Radharani meeting the eyes of Krishna after 100 years of separation in the land of Vrindavan.' And not just this, 'O Radhike, this love that we have experienced, I will share it with the world by the loud chanting of Hare Krishna Mahamantra.'"
Bhaktivedanta. Whatever you have tasted, O Radhike, and then I will share it with the world. So, when people pull the Rathyatra, they are actually coming between Radha and Krishna in the mood of the Brajabasis and helping in the service of meeting of Radha and Krishna. And they are dancing and singing and crying and laughing in the mood of the Gopis, enjoy meeting Krishna after so many years of separation. In this way, Srila Govinda Maharaja, in his book, "The Embankment of Separation," very beautifully explains the internal mood, the internal heart, and the background history of Radha and Krishna in Vrindavan, separated in Vrindavan and Dwarka, and then meeting again in Vrindavan, and then again in Kali Yuga, meeting as Jagannath in the presence of Chaitanya Mahaprabhu. When Chaitanya Mahaprabhu looks at Jagannath, what is he seeing? He's seeing. And when Jagannath looks at Chaitanya, what is Jagannath? But what is the world seeing? The world is saying Mahaprabhu. And so, their meeting in the Ratha of ecstasy is.