Transcription
July 3rd, 1903. Chastisements with contagious and mortal diseases. This morning, having received communion, as soon as I saw my adorable Jesus, I said to him, "My beloved Lord, how is it that you are sending so many chastisements? Why this time do you not want to placate yourself for any reason? It seems that all means I've failed, both praying and saying, 'Lord, pour your bitterness is upon me.' God has not been your usual way to act like this."
While I was saying this, interrupting my speaking, blessed Jesus answered, "Yet, my daughter, the chastisement I am sending are still nothing compared to those which have been prepared, and therefore do not want to afflict yourself with these because they are not a matter of great affliction."
Tazi was saying this in front of me. I saw many people affected by contagious diseases who were dying. So taken by horror, I said to him, "How, Lord, that's all we need! What are you doing? What are you doing? If you want to do this, take me away from this earth where my heart cannot bear the sight of scenes so gloomy. Besides, who can endure continuing in this state in which you put me, that you do not come or you come like a shadow? Not only this, would you leave me dazed, sleepy, not letting me understand anything anymore? Yet you told me that you would leave me like this until you would somehow give vent to your fury, but now you want to add fury to fury and it seems you will not be done for now. Poor me, poor me! Who will give me the strength to remain in this state? Who would be able to endure?"
"Faul," I poured out my affliction. Compassionating me, Jesus said to me, "My daughter, do not be concerned by your state of sleepiness. This says that just as I am with people as if I were sleeping, as if I did not hear them and look at them, in that same state I have placed you. After all, if you mind it, I told you last time, 'Do you want me to suspend your state of victim?'"
"And I, Lord, obedience does not want me to accept this suspension."
"And he, 'Well then, what do you want for me?'"
"Be quiet and obey." Who can say how afflicted I remained? Not only this, but it seems that my interior powers were left so asleep that I live as if I were not living. "O Lord, have pity on me! Do not leave me in abandonment and such a pitiful and sorrowful state."
July 3rd, 1902. Volume 4. Jesus speaks about his Eucharistic life. Continuing in my usual state, I found myself outside of myself, inside a church. And since I could not find my adorable Jesus, I went to knock at a Tabernacle to have him open it for me. Since he would not open, "May brave I'm myself opened it, and I found my soul and only good." Who can say my contentment? I remained as though ecstatic in looking at an unspeakable beauty.
On seeing me, Jesus flung himself into my arms and told me, "My daughter, each period of my life receives from man distinct and special acts and degrees of imitation, of love, of reparation, and other things. But the period of my Eucharistic life is all life of hiddenness, of transformation, and of continuous consummation. So much so that I can say that after my love reached the excess and was even consumed in my infinite wisdom, I could not find any other external sign to prove my love for man. And just as my incarnation, life, and passion on the cross received love, praise, thanksgiving, imitation, my sacramental life receives from man an ecstatic love, a love of dissolving oneself in me, a love of perfect consummation. And as the soul is consumed in my very sacramental life, she can say that she performs before the divinity the same offices that I perform continuously before God for love of men. And this consummation will make the soul overflow into eternal life."
July 3rd, 1903. Vol 5. If the soul gives herself completely to Jesus in life, Jesus gives himself to her at her death and exempts her from purgatory. Who? This morning, I was very afflicted because of the loss of my adorable Jesus. All of a sudden, he made himself seen in my interior, filling my person completely, and that is my head, my arms, and all the rest. As I was seeing this, almost wanting to explain to me the meaning of the way he was making himself seen, he told me, "My daughter, why do you afflict yourself? If I am the master of all of you, when a soul comes to rendering me the master of her mind, of her arms, of her heart, and of her feet, sin cannot reign. And if something involuntary enters into her, since I and the master and the soul is under the influence of my lordship, she is in continuous attitude of purgation, and that something immediately goes out of her. Furthermore, since I am holy, it is difficult for her to retain within herself anything which is not holy. Even more, since she has given all of herself to me in life, it is justice that I give all of myself to her at her death, admitting her to the beatific vision without delay. So, if one gives herself completely to me, the flames of purgatory have nothing to do with her."
July 3rd, 1905. Volume 6. Declarations of Jesus regarding the state of Luisa. Continuing in my usual state, I found myself outside of myself and I found the Queen Mama with baby Jesus in her arms, giving him her most sweet milk. On seeing that the baby was suckling milk from the breast of our mother, I removed him very gently from her breast and I began to suckle myself. On seeing me doing this, both of them smiled at my foxiness, but they let me suckle.
And then, after this, the Queen Mother told me, "Take your pretty little one and enjoy him." And I took him in my arms. In the meantime, noises of weapons could be heard from outside. And he said to me, "And this government will fall." And I, when touching the tip of his finger, he added, "Just another fingertip." And I, "Who knows how long this fingertip is for you?" But he did not pay attention to me. And since I was not really interested in knowing it, I said, "How I wish to know the will of God with to me." And he told me, "Do you have a piece of paper?"
"For I myself will write and declare my will about you." I did not have it, so I went to look for one and gave it to him. And the baby wrote, "I declare before heaven and earth that it is my will to have chosen her as victim. I declare that she made the donation of her soul and body to me, and since I am her absolute master, whenever I please, I shared the pains of my passion with her, and in exchange, I have given her access to my divinity. I declare that in this access, she prays to me every day for sinners continuously, and she draws a continuous flow of life for the good of sinners themselves." And he wrote many other things which I don't remember too well, therefore I leave them out.
On hearing this, I felt all confused and I said, "Lord, forgive me if I render myself impertinent. I did not want to know this that you have written. It is enough for me that you alone know it. What I would like to know is whether it is enough for me that you alone know it. What I would like to know is whether it is your will for my state to continue." And in my mind, I continued, "Whether it is as well for the Confessor to come to call me to obedience, or rather, the time I spend with the Confessor is my own fantasy." But I did not want to say it, fearing that I might be wanting to know too much, convincing myself that if one thing is his will, the other must be his will too.
And baby Jesus continued to write, "I declare that it is my will that you continue in this state, and that the Confessor come to cause you to obedience, as well as the time you spend with him. It is also my will for you to be caught by the fear that your state may not be my will. This fear and doubt purifies you of every slightest effect." The Queen Mother and Jesus blessed me. By kissed their hands, and I found myself inside myself.
July 3rd, 1906. Vol 7. The will of God is the paradise of the soul on earth, and the soul who does the will of God forms the paradise of God on earth. Having received communion, I felt all united and clasped to my most divine Jesus. And while he Plast me, I rested in him, and he rested in me. Then he told me, "My beloved, the soul who lives in my will rests, because the Divine Will does everything for her, and while it operates for her, I find the most beautiful rest in her. So the will of God is rest for the soul and rest for God in the soul. And while resting in my will, the soul remains always attached to my mouth and suckles divine life into herself, making of it her continuous food. The will of God is the paradise of the soul on earth, and the soul who does the will of God comes to form the paradise of God on earth. The will of God is the only key that opens the treasures of the divine secrets, and the soul acquires such familiarity in the house of God as to dominate as if she were the owner."
Who can say what I comprehended about this divine will? O will of God, how admirable, lovable, desirable, beautiful you are! It is enough to say that being in you, I feel all my miseries and all my evils being dissolved, and I acquire a new being with the fullness of all the divine girls.
End of July third. Fiat.