ID - The Gateway to an Alternate Life - Day 9

Our identity, as we know it, begins to form from the instant we take our first breath. We start off as a blank slate, an open book waiting to be written. Our early years are filled with first steps, first sights, first discoveries. Each of these moments shapes us, adds a brushstroke to the canvas of our character.

As we move through adolescence, the picture becomes more complex. Little by little, we become a mosaic, a multifaceted collage, a puzzle formed from the fragments of our life.

There comes a day where we grasp the paintbrush ourselves. We realize that we need not be defined solely by circumstance. We understand that we have the power to paint our own future. We awaken to find that we can reshape our identity. Our identity continues to evolve, but now as an intentional work of art, guided by our own hand. We are the artist and the masterpiece.

It is time to step into a greater identity. This is the gateway to your alternate life.

Hello beautiful people of identity work. Are you starting to feel the words in the animation land deeper when you watch it? Like, can you feel how all of a sudden, like, at first it's a beautiful poem, and then eventually it's like, "Oh my gosh, the greatest truth ever told"? Like, there's something so powerful about watching the experience of the trailer change in your body. Like, at first it's a beautiful concept, and by the end, it's like a mantra to live by. It's very cool.

So, we've got a big one today. Got a big one today. The first thing I want to bring forward, and I think this is going to be a cool little shift to bring us forward, like, a leap here, is: Who here has ever struggled with the concept of confidence? Like, when someone says, "You've got to be more confident," or you think, "I have to be more confident." Right? So, when you're trying to be more confident, what do you think that means? When someone says, "You have to be more confident," or you try to be more confident, what do you think it means? And where do you get blocked on that?

"Lynn says, 'I was just so curious about how you're so confident.' So where, what is it?"

"No fear, self-belief, braver, comfortable in my own skin. I don't have that. Relaxed, believing in myself more. People see me as confident, but I feel blocked. Being something that I'm not. Arrogant, bitter, posture. You have to love yourself more. Self-assured, trust myself more. Less shame. Don't care what people think. You know, I meant to be a badass. I think it means taking up space. It means being comfortable being yourself and feeling embodied in your identity."

So, are you seeing in this moment that literally every single thing I have read is different? So, here's an interesting thought: What if, when you feel you are confident, your description of it is something that you *are*? And when you feel like you're not confident, the description of it is something that you're *not*? So, for those of you who feel confident, you probably wrote for me the exact definition of something that you already are. And if you feel like you're not confident, you just wrote the exact definition of something you feel like you're not, which is why you're not confident, because you don't have the one thing that you just made the definition be. And for those of you who are confident, you just beautifully wrote the thing you most are, and you wrote it, and you were like, "And I am that, and so I am confident."

The craziest thing about language and words is that most people do this: They decide what a word means that either validates their experience in a good way or validates their experience in a terrible way. Because all that really matters is the validation of their experience. Nothing else matters. So, the identity work, and why it's so powerful, is like, "I will choose what my identity is, and I will spend the rest of my life validating that identity." So, if the identity that I have is that I'm inadequate, I will even change the meaning of words to suit my my plot. Like, I'm plotting to feel like a failure. So let me even decide what confidence means. Let me pick the one thing I don't have. Let me call confidence the one thing I'm struggling with, and then I get to say, "I'm not."

So, there are so many different angles that we can take for confidence. What does it even mean? It means you're not questioning yourself, I guess. It means, yes, like, when you're confident, you're just who you are. When you're confident, you're just not questioning who you should be or thinking you should be something else. Like, it's just a, it's just a frequency of, "This is me." But what if you don't like who this "me" is? So then you're not confident, because confident would mean loving who I am, and I'm not. And if I'm not confident, it would mean being self-assured, which I'm not. And if I'm not confident, then it would mean I have to have authority, which I don't have. If I'm not confident, then you'll find all the ways of what it means, and you'll give it that meaning, and then you don't have it, and it feels like you'll never have it, and then you're not a confident person. That gets added to your identity, and it's just harder to change. Versus when confidence is something that you *are*. You believe you're confident.

So let's just play this game, just for fun, in the context of sabotaging ourselves entirely and treating ourselves like crap and being the identity of someone who's not good enough and who just sucks in general. How could you describe confidence in a way that would really be a problem for you? Like, if this is what confidence is, you're up S creek without a paddle. Like, if this is what confidence is, your goose is cooked. So, what's confidence that you need to explain it to me? And when you write it, you're like, "I don't have that, so I'm not confident." How would you write it?

"So, confidence is trusting yourself." So if confidence is trusting myself, and I don't trust myself, then I'm not confident. "Confidence is being wild." I'm not wild, so I'm not confident. "Confidence is trusting yourself." And I don't trust myself. "Uh, I know everyone likes me, and I'm going for all of it." So, confidence is, "Everybody likes me, and I'm going for all of it," and I definitely don't feel that, so I'm not confident. "Confidence is, I'm as far along as I should be. I have, I am exactly where I should be in life." That's confidence. I don't feel that, so I'm not confident. "Confidence is perfection." And I'm not perfect, so I'm not confident. "Always extroverted. Always extroverted, and I'm not faking it till you make it." This is confidence.

If confidence was, "I never feel fear," would be a problem, right? Ian, so I am the same in every room I walk into. Confidence is, no matter where you walk in, whether you're walking in a room with billionaires, or whether you're walking in the room with new moms, or whether you're walking in the room with supermodels, no matter where you walk in the room, you feel just as strong, no matter where you're walking. That's confidence. If you don't have that, you're in trouble.

To be 100% certain of the result. I leave nothing up to fate or chance or nothing. I know with certainty everything that will occur in the moment, in the future. I know that is confidence. If I don't know that, my goose is cooked. Being able to do something from zero to hero in a click of a finger. That's confidence. Zero to hero, just like that. I'm confident. I'm the one. That's it. And if I can't do that, not confident.

Always positive. Always. Even when I have three flat tires this month and my fridge goes bust, I am positive. Even when I trap my finger in the door and break my nail, I am positive. Even though I can feel my heartbeat in the tip of my finger and it's really frustrating, I am positive. Even though the saddest thing in the whole world just happened to me or a family member, this is great. And if I can't do that, not a confident person.

100% self-assured. 99, not confident. Never doubting myself. Never, never even questioning it. I am right, and I don't overthink. I think that I do. Done. And I don't question anything. I know. I know everything. And if I can't do that, no good.

Being the best all the time. Second best, failure, nothing like that. Best all the time. Now I'm confident. It's enough for me to add the word "should," and I'm done. So the minute you, so there's nothing you should be doing. Everything that you're doing is exactly what you should be doing. There's not one thing on your list of things that should be done. Everything has been done. Now you're confident.

Oh, great. Being financially stable. You know, even as a billionaire, like, there's not one stock that went out of place or nothing like that. Like, you, everything's perfect. The money is not moving. Great consistency. Absolutely no variety in your life whatsoever. Now you're confident.

You never doubt yourself. You never question yourself at all. You are the holy righteousness of truth and life. And if there is anything that you even question, from, you're not confident. Makes perfect sense. I'm organized and certain. Everything has its place. No variety, no surprises, absolutely no chaos. And I know the outcome of everything. Now I'm confident. Great.

Are you guys starting to see how entirely insane this is? Like, we're all doomed.

Always smell good. Always. Even when I've just, just had a three-hour workout. Always. Always. Like, how is that? How is that what we sometimes do to ourselves? But it is. We'll look for the one thing we probably don't have, and we'll say, "That's what confidence is." When in fact, confidence is, "This is this is who I am."

So, I just, I made a mistake, but I figured it out. You know, I made a mistake, and I'm still figuring it out. I learned something. I didn't know. I had a breakthrough. I've been struggling with for a really long time. I, um, you know, I have so much fear, and I still trust myself to try. And I know that if anything goes wrong, I'll figure it out, and I'll, I'll, I'll get myself back on the horse. Like, I have fear, but I still go for what I want. Those things are confidence. But when we're feeling them, we don't think those to confidence because we're trying to validate an identity that we're not confident. So we can't say that the thing that we're doing that's in alignment with confidence is confidence, because that would sabotage the thing we're trying to prove, which is that we suck. Especially on a hard day. "Today I suck." So anything that I, I do that's good is still not good enough because it will invalidate my experience that I suck, and that's more important to me than anything else.

So when we realize these identity shifts, we, we start to open up. Like, "Okay, so confidence isn't something you have." Like, who even said confidence is something you need to have 100% of the time, or else it doesn't exist? Like, what if you could say, "There's days I have a lot of confidence, and there's days that I have less confidence"? Could that be true? And what if you said, "Like, 51% of the time I feel confident, which means I'm a confident person with off days"? Could that be true? Instead of, "If I'm not confident 100% of the time, it means I'm not a confident person." It's like, "In general, I'm a confident person." And obviously, there's things sometimes that, you know, make me wobble or question or wonder, but most of the time, I'm a confident person. Would it change your life to say things like that?

"I am, in general, a confident person. Obviously, there's things from time to time that have me question and wobble, and their situations, or I'm not quite sure what to do, but I, I work through those, and I find myself, and I learn, and then I grow. And, but in general, I'm a confident person." 51%. If you can be confident in things 51% of the time, you're allowed to say that. We don't want to say that because then we're afraid that people are going to judge us on the day where we're not confident. People who, the ones that are also struggling with their confidence, the ones that are perfect. Which ones are those? Who people? Who are the people who are going to judge you? Because on one day that you're not feeling confident, when in general you're a confident person, are the people who don't allow themselves to say they're a confident person unless they're 100% confident. Yet here you are at 51%, claiming, "I'm confident, and I sometimes I have bad days, but generally I'm a confident person." Then they see you on a bad day, and they're real mad that you give yourself the right to claim yourself as a confident person when they wouldn't let themselves unless they hit 100%. That's the only person you're going to make mad. The only person that will be mad is the person who's keeping themselves in an identity of "is suck" because they can't hit 100%. Whereas you've claimed, "In general, I'm a confident person," and you're having a bad day. They're like, "How dare you! My measurement of confidence is perfection, and you're not perfect, and you're claiming to be confident. It's a lie. I reject it. I reject you, and I reject all things that aren't perfect. I hate it all."

But the more we soften, and we're like, "We're allowed to be, in general, a confident person having a bad day," then I can, I can accept that for me and for you. And I can watch a really confident person have a tough day and see it as validation in the support of the amazingness that I am, and say, "See, even this person that I love and admire and see is so amazing is having a tough day. And if she can have a tough day, I can have a tough day. And if they can have a tough day, I can have a tough day and still be extraordinary most of the time, and still be confident most of the time." Imagine if we started looking at life like that instead of, "See, you say you're a confident person, but here you are having a hard day. I knew it, because I need to validate my truth that if you're not perfectly confident, you're not confident."

Like, is Oprah 100% confident? Let's test it. Imagine she's on the toilet, and someone walks in by accident. You think she's vibrating at 100% confidence, or does she have a moment of like, "I'm going to go with..." She has a wobble. She has a little wobble in that moment. Nobody's perfect. Nobody. So if that's the measurement, no wonder.

And so the thing is, if we can only be perfect in any identity, or else it doesn't fly, then it's probably better to aim for being self-deprecating, because you can be, you can control being perfect at being self-deprecating, because even when things are good about you, you can spin them. So if my actual way of validating an identity is 100% success, my best shot is deciding that I'm self-deprecating, that I'm mediocre, that I'm not as good as I am, that I, I'm not where I should be, because that is the easiest thing for me to prove. No matter what someone tells me, "You look so beautiful today," I say, "No." They say, "I loved the way your call went," I say, "It was terrible." They say, "That was genius," and I say, "No, it was so much better in my head. I screwed it up." They say, "Gosh, I'm so impressed with what you've been doing lately," and I say, "It should have been better." They say, "Wow, you've had an incredible year," and I say, "It was better last year." They say, "You look, you sounded amazing," and I say, "I've got a little sniffle, and I feel like it messed everything up." And they say, "You had a great hair day," and I say, "No, it's terrible. It was the worst." Like, I can control 100% self-deprecation. I can control that. So if the identity needs to be 100%, my only bet is negative, because that I can control. I can't have 100% positive.

This is why it's so important for us to be able to be able to hold duality. 51% to to 49%. You're in the zone. Because if I can be 51% happy and 49% upset, stressed, or whatever, and still decide that I'm a happy person, there's like, "I'm going to be, I can find happiness every day of my life." If I can hold both like that, there's no stopping me. But if I've got to be 100%, 1% kicks me out.

So if you said, "In general, I'm a confident person, but I'm learning every day. There's days that are tougher than others, but in general, I am a confident person. I believe in me. I believe I'm doing big things, and I'm learning, and I put myself in environments to learn." Like, and in general, I am. Today, I'm having a hard day, but in general, I'm a confident person. Wouldn't that change things?

Then there's the other conversation: self-worth. So, who here has ever had a problem with, "I am worthy. I am worthy of good things. I deserve it." Self-worth. Like, "I am worth it. I am worth money. I am worth time. I am worth energy. I am worth being seen. I am worth being validated. I am worth other people listening to me. I am worth it. I'm worth it. I'm worth it. I'm worth it."

So, one of the issues with being worth it is that it's often calculated by other people's way of treating us. So we calculate it based on other, other people's capacity. So I'll give you an example. I, I was shown a diamond once. It was a yellow diamond that was mined in Canada, and it was raw, raw yellow gold diamond, hasn't been polished or anything yet. And they, they put it in the palm of my hands. It was probably about this big, the nugget. And it needed to be completely polished, and it still needed to be, it didn't look like a diamond. Like, I would have walked right past it on the floor. I would have thought it was a piece of broken glass. Like, I never would have understood that was a diamond. It didn't look it, it didn't feel it, nothing. If someone would have shown me this, this piece of rock and said to me, "Value this," I would have said, "Nothing. I don't even need, like, how much will you buy this for?" I would have said, "I'm not, I don't want it. Like, five bucks. I don't even want it." Because I don't know what it is.

So why is it that we are asking people to value us that are not connoisseurs of fine things? Like, don't ask me to value this rock, I don't even know what it is. But show this to a diamond expert, and they'll be like, "Um, I'll give you a million dollars for it." Like, "What? You'll give me a million dollars for this?" Sold. "What do you mean it's worth?" "For you, you don't know what you're talking about."

So our problem is that we're asking people who don't know value to tell us what our worth is. People who struggle with their own self-worth, people who are valuing themselves based on metrics that make no sense, like, "1% imperfection equals you're a failure." And I'm the one that's navigating your worth. What chance do we have at an accurate representation of our value? And because most people don't value their worth based on their own perception, they're like, "How much would you pay for me? How much would you pay for me? How much an hour?" "That's too much for you." "That's too much for you." "That's too much for you." "Oh, probably I'm not worth that."

How many of you right here, right now, would spend $4 million on a diamond today? Raise your hand. Guess what? Doesn't change the worth of the diamond at all. Doesn't even matter. Even if 350 people say, "I would never spend even $1 million on a diamond," that doesn't change the value of the diamond, though. It doesn't matter who can't pay you. It doesn't change your worth.

This is one of the biggest misconceptions because the problem is, most of us have built our network around a past identity, and now we're trying to present the value that we've just realized that we have, and present it to people with a budget equal to the values and thoughts and belief systems that we had before. And they're like, "What? If you're, I'm not worth that." So you're not worth that. And that's where a lot of the comparison comes from. The same person I said to you before that would judge you, "I'm not, I don't let myself be perfect. If I have 1% doubt, you're operating at 50% and you want me to buy that? I don't buy that. You're not allowed to say that you're confident." "I, I would have to be perfect to be allowed." And so you have to be perfect to be allowed. "If I'm not worth this much, you're not worth this much."

The kind of people that are actually the greatest people to be around is, of course, you're worth this much. If I'm this much, you're worth that much, if not more. Of course, you're worth this much. Of course, you're extraordinary. I'm extraordinary, and I struggle 50% of the time. You struggle 99%. Are you kidding me? You're incredible. Those are our people. People the ones who are like, "If I can do it, you can do it."

And I have, I have been met with this, and this is one of my greatest breakthroughs in my career. There was a wave that that really, really hurt my heart of people who said that I basically lied about believing in people, that that I said I believed in people, but I didn't. And it's so weird when someone says something like that about you, because there really is no way to prove them wrong. It's a belief. It's in my head, it's in my heart, it's in my body. Like, how am I supposed to fight you about that? And I honestly felt entirely exhausted by it, because I couldn't figure out how I was ever going to prove it, that I genuinely meant every word I said on the internet, that I'm not a scam artist that's trying to get people to believe in themselves when in fact I don't believe in anybody. Like, that's not who I am. And it shocked me to my core to hear this. It was like, "How do people agree with this? How, how can this many people think this is what I'm doing?" It shook me. I didn't know how to post anymore. I know how to talk anymore. It really paralyzed me for a minute until I got this breakthrough.

These are people who believe, "If I can't, nobody can." Their identity is, "If I can't, nobody can." This is the truth. I, I'm in my own, own body. I think I know what it looks like to believe in people. I know how much a person can believe in people. There's no way this person believes in people. But my truth is, if I, and and and it's based on, and this is the other truth that's unfortunate but true, is that these people hadn't yet broken through yet. They hadn't yet even had the own their own evidence that they could do it. So of course they're like, "I can't even do it, so I don't believe anybody else can do it." Why would I believe you can do something if I can't do it?

But my truth is, I did something incredible, and not just once. I did it over and over and over and over again. And it didn't feel like I had to create another person of me. I just had to put the old one down and stay curious. It didn't feel like I had to be perfect. It just felt like I had to be open. I just had to put stuff down and open my mind up. Like, I believe we can all do it because I did it. I believe about the world what I believe about me.

So craziest thing is, the more we are set free, the more we believe in ourselves, the more we change the world. Because the crazy thing, who here at the beginning of their personal development journey had this immediate feeling of like, "I need everybody to know about this! I want to tell everybody I know about the law of attraction and manifestation and positive thinking." Like, I feel like I want to tell everybody immediately. The minute you hear it, you're like, "Oh my gosh, a holy grail of living." You want to tell everybody the minute you hear it. And then eventually, if there's things that haven't worked for you, you've struggled, you talk about it a little less because maybe you believe in it a little less. But the beginning is like, "Listen to me." I still have that same feeling because it's worked.

So my genuine truth is, I believe that you can do this. My genuine truth is, I know you can do this. I've seen so many people go from like destitute to wealthy, on the verge of a divorce to renewing their vows, like every single miracle you could think of, every transformation you could ever think of, I've seen them all. Every single thing, stopping addictions, changing their body, changing their everything. Like, there's not one thing I haven't seen. Not one. So I believe in it, and I really believe in it. So when I talk to you, I talk to you knowing you could be anything, and I mean it because I know it, because I've seen it, because I have no reason not to believe in it. I did it. They did it. You can do it. That's it. That's it.

But when other people see, "I've never done it. I don't know a person in my life that's done it." And then I see this person who, like, "We can do big things." It's like, "Yeah, yeah, you're just trying to sell your salad." And I get it, that they think that it's normal. But then the real work is, I've got to believe it for me. Because if I can believe it for me, I can change the world. If I don't believe it for me, then I will always measure the world's capability through my experience. "It's hard. It's not possible. I can't do it." And then what other people are worth is less.

You know, a lot of times I have clients come to me and they're like, "I want people to see my worth. You know, I want them to see my value, and I'm struggling." Who here is an entrepreneur and has that? Like, people aren't paying your pricing for coaching, or they're not paying, they're not wanting to join something that you're doing, or they're not buying your product, and it really feels like it's your worth that they're not seeing. Have you had that experience? Okay.

Whenever I make an offer and someone says, "I wish I could do it, I just can't financially," or they don't even respond, or they, they don't do it. At first, I used, I did used to think like, "They don't see my value. I need to work harder at my value." It's not my value. It's the thought, "What if I'm the only person this doesn't work for? Like, if I knew for sure that doing this would change my life, I'd do it. But what if it doesn't?" That's what it really is. It's not about my value. It's not about my worth. And when I detached from that, I started making so much more money easily. Because instead of me trying to prove more that I'm good enough, which was never the case, I actually started working on the right thing, which was helping people believe in themselves. Because that's all it's about anyway. It's about you saying, "I am on the brink of myself. This is just the beginning. If I can come this far and this long, I can become more. I believe in me. This works for me. This changes my life. I am worth investing in. I believe in me. I am worth it." That's the things that matters way more than me.

Melanie, "I am worth it." I can preach my worth to you all day, every day. That might actually make you feel less. Have you ever had that experience? The more someone tells you how great they are, the less confident you are in yourself. There's, what are the chances you're going to invest in yourself if the more that person talks, the less good you feel about you? The whole goal is not for me to be more valuable. And if I need you to buy from me in order for me to feel valuable, I missed the point. That this is not about me. My job is helping you believe in you. That's my job. If I can do that, then I'm going to get paid anyway. If I can help you transform enough that it feels worth it to keep transforming, the money is going to come. My job is not to prove to myself that I'm good enough by you saying yes to buying something. If that is my job, I'm going to fail at some point, whether it's now or tomorrow, like, it's coming. Failure is coming because I'm, I, I need you to say yes to me for me to be successful. Instead of my actual job is transforming human beings, and the more human beings transform, the money is coming, no matter what. My job is to work with you to help you. It completely detaches it from my value.

Your worth has got to be decided by you. And the more your worth increases to you, the more you will believe in other people. I don't price my things based on what it's worth to me. I price things based on what it's worth to you. Like, why is WAF $222? I could I could charge 10 grand a month for WAF if the people that were in it were making a million dollars a month. The same information, it would be worth it. But I price it based on what it's worth to who I'm building the container for. I see WAF as the building block. I see WAF, like, we are ALFM membership. I see it as the person who is starting, who wants to feel what it's like to be in a long-term mentorship, who's believing in themselves enough to say, "I'm going at this month to month. I'm learning every month. I'm not putting this down. I'm on a roll, and this is going somewhere, and I believe in me, and I'm doing this." Like, that is who I'm building it for. So what's the price? $222. I could charge $1,000 a month, $10,000 a month, if the person that I was M, I was selling it to was a different person.

When I'm doing the coach program, I'm like, if a person is willing to invest $5,000 in themselves, it's because they believe in their ability to be a coach. If they don't want to spend $5,000 on themselves because they don't believe they can make $5,000, they're not ready for the coach program. If you don't believe you can make $5,000, don't take the coach program. If you're like, "Uh, yeah, $5,000, I want to at least replace the income I had at my job, so I'm aiming for like 50, 60, 70, 80, $100,000." So $5,000 for a program is like, "Of course, that's perfect. This is what I need." That's the price. Not because it's what's worth it for me, it's what's worth it for you. And when enough people say yes and believe in themselves, there's no limit to what I will earn. The sky isn't even the limit. But my job is helping people get to the place where they believe in themselves the way I believed in myself to create myself.

How can I do that if I don't believe in myself? So my big job is, I believe in me enough that I can believe in you. And my belief in you starts to bleed into your belief in you. Just for fun, how, just being in this container for like seven days, or however long we've been here, 10 days, who has started to believe in themselves just a little bit more? Who feels like you believe in yourself just a little bit more than when you started? How did that happen? All I did is talk to you. But I said to you the things I've said to me. I know these conversations are mind-blowing. I know they change things. I, I gave you the thoughts I thought. I gave you the exercises I've done. I gave you the processes I've done. I know they work because I feel, I feel me. I know the shift. So I don't need to worry about whether I'm worthy or worth it. I know I am. I work on that every day, and then I'm just generous with my knowing. So I know what I know. If you're in, you'll, you'll just get it. That's how the world starts to open.

You want to help people be so sure about yourself that you don't even need to worry about them. When you're like, "But what if I can't help people change?" It's because you're not sure about yourself. You're still waiting for outside approval of other people paying you, whether other people say yes. Let's say nobody said yes. Nobody bought the program. Here, nobody, nobody said yes to "We Are Alpha Fem." Nobody buys Coach. Nobody buys Impact Academy. I understand the feeling inside of being like, "Oh, maybe I'm not good." I do. But I wouldn't say I'm not good at what I do because nobody paid me. I would say I'm not good at what I do because nobody shifted enough to believe they could keep going. That changed my career. That gave me something bigger. Because it wasn't, "How do I make more money?" It was, "How do I make people see what I see for them?" And so my teachings just got better, and my coaching just got better, and my impact and my influence became strong because it wasn't about, "How do I be valuable enough to be paid?" It was like, "How do I, how do I get them to get it?" If I miss the mark here, it's about you. It's all about you. And I don't even need to worry about me. If I help enough people believe in themselves and break free, I will not need to worry about me. And I also know what I'm doing. I'm doing for good. And I also know that every dollar that comes into my world is good for the world. And I, I know that whatever I receive, whether it's money, impact, influence, friendships, connections, will also be used for good. So I'm squeaky clean about all of that. All I need to do is get you to get it. If I can get you to get it, we're all going, we're all going in the right direction. All of us.

We could literally, this whole group, just walk to the next step. Boom. Just one step. Boom. And all of us are in a different world. Just like that. One move. It isn't hard, but it's everything it takes. It's all of my heart and all of your heart, and all of my belief and all of your belief, and a shift and a shift and a move and a move and go. And we're in a different world. One move at a time. And then I give you everything I've got once more, and I help you go from where you were to where you are then. And you make that one shift, and then it's like, "Okay, now I'm here." Perfect. Then I give you an an option to do something else, and then you move, and then I move, and then we move. Boom. One move. That's it. And then we're somewhere else. And then I help you go from where you were then to when you, where you are to the next step. And you say yes because you believe in you. And you take a move, and we take a move, and boom, we're all there. And that's how this stuff works. You just have to keep moving. You don't say, "Okay, I should be fixed now." You don't say, "Okay, hopefully this fixed to me." There is no fixing. The goal is that you move through time, that you believe in you more, that you gather more evidence that you actually believe in you more and more and more, and that you have more reasons to believe in you.

Why? The more you believe in you, the more you believe in the world. Every single thing you desire is attached to your belief in you. Because what you believe you can do, you believe others can do. When you believe investing is easy because you do it, you believe other people will invest in your art, in your work, in your company, in your ventures. You just believe it. When you believe confidence is something that anyone can tap into, you believe in other people's confidence in their abilities. You speak to them differently. You speak to them like they're strong, capable people. And then you start to attract strong, capable people. When you believe people are scared and shy and not sure and probably going to say no, you speak to them like they're incapable. There's a match for that.

So self-worth is something you've got to give yourself. You decide, "I am worthy. I am worth it. I am worth something." All the stories that we found, the making of you, how you became you, that's the beginning of that. Like, how the heck can I even question this? Can we just see how many hundred people it took to get me to be here? The generations, the difficulties, the decisions, the heartbreak, the moving countries, the miracles, the odds. Like, what the heck am I even thinking? I am worth, I am worth indescribable amounts of time, energy, money, love. Like, I'm a miracle. And then if I am this, and you are this, then let's go. This, this is where self-worth comes from.

Now, when you take confidence, which is like, the confidence is not, I don't think confidence is tangible. I think confidence is looking at the things you're good at and deciding that's what confidence is. And I think that not confidence is looking at the things that you're not and deciding that that's what confidence is. Confident people, people are able to see their good, their good traits, and decide that that's enough. Not confident people decide that the thing that they would need in order to be confident is the one thing they don't have. Nobody's perfect, but you're confident when you look at your best traits and decide that's what confidence is. These things that I'm good at, and I have them, so let's go.

Self-worth isn't something someone else tells you you have, because you don't know if they're a kisser or not. They may have never seen a diamond. It's not their job to tell you what you're worth. They think you're rock. Some people have never even seen a diamond, and they're the ones that are valuing you. This doesn't make sense. So now we look at this, and this is, and for those of you who did, um, current C with me last year, value sees value. Remember, you're rare, unique, limited edition. This is how these things start to come together in the most incredible way, right? So what we want is, we want to hold ourselves in high regard. Like, "I am the one who sees myself in a way that's a projection that I see the whole world through." Like, "I am the lens I see the whole world through." If I see failure for me, I see failure in the world. If I see imperfection in me, I see imperfection in the world. If I see struggle in me, I see struggle in the world. If I see dishonesty in me, I see dishonesty in the world. If I see hardship in me, I see hardship in the world. If I see value in me, I see value in the world. I, if I see confidence in me, I see confidence in the world. And so we shape the way we look at things with our own identity. I hold myself in high esteem because that is who I am. And as I hold myself like that, I see you that way. Just because what else would I be focusing on? This is the value. This is the lens I see the world with.

Who has noticed being in this program, you like people in here a little more than you usually like people? Like, who has experienced being like, "These people are amazing. These stories are incredible." Things that you might not even consider on a daily basis. Like, "Why is everyone here so amazing?" Is because you've been focusing on how amazing you are, and your lens has changed. This is a controlled environment. We've created what we can create with our minds in this space. But the thing is, the world, the real, you know, odds of the world are different than what we're experiencing right now. This is not exactly how the world really sees the world. And it is very easy to be influenced by the outside world. Right now, you're being influenced by the by the inside. You are focused. You are paying attention. You are contemplating these things. These are the things you're reading about. These are the people that you're seeing. These are the things you are in control of your life in this moment. Most people can't do that because they have no environment like this to plug into. This is a magical space because everywhere you look, it validates everything you believe. This is the greatest way to move forward is to have other people that also mirror back to you your beauty, and you mirror your beauty to other people, and it just becomes this compound space.

Out there, one thinks they're not good enough. They've not done this work. They're waiting for other people to tell them what they're worth. They think confidence is the one thing they're not, and they value themselves in a low regard. And imagine that everyone sucks as bad as they do, and they don't like people. Shocking. And they're annoyed by people, and they don't believe in people. People won't pay. People are scared. People are this. I'm so annoyed. But in here, total opposite.

So what's the journey? The journey is to find our way back to ourselves so we can genuinely feel excited about our life. You remember the first thing I said to you? My goal for you is by the end of this program, you feel genuinely excited about life. To feel excited about life means that you believe that happiness is coming. If you believe that happiness is coming, that's how you get excited about life. Like, why are kids excited about Christmas morning? Because happiness is coming. You're excited when you feel happy. Happiness is coming. You're afraid when you feel sadness is coming or pain is coming. So how do we ever imagine happiness is coming with ease and flow? What's the easiest way to imagine happiness is coming? Is to believe, "I'm a happy person. I'm a happy person." Like, "Yeah, sometimes stuff happens from time to time, but in general, I'm a happy person." And I'm excited because if I'm happy now, and happiness is gratitude, right? I'm a grateful person. I'm a happy person. I know how to look for gratitude. I know how to look for happiness. I know how to do it. Good things are coming. Happy is coming. Like, so I can be excited about life.

But now there's identity happy and superficial happy. And identity happy is something that you have got to stay connected to, because when happy is who I am, happy is coming. When happy is what happens, it depends. And then we've got to go based on odds. And the more we interact with the people out there, the more we hear the, the odds are pretty crappy. But when we're in places like this, even the odds are higher. I've had people, I've seen people here make posts about like, "The traffic jams have changed for them." "There, I have manifested no traffic jam since the beginning of this program." "I had a conversation with my parents, it worked out great." "I'm manifesting no traffic." "I've given up a habit." "I've I've gotten the most incredible private messages, people being like, 'I've never felt so happy. You've shifted something. Like, I feel like I'm not, not depressed. Like, I actually don't feel depressed the last few days. I felt it. Like, I have not felt like this, I don't even remember in how long. Like, this is, this is wild.'" In here, we're focusing on happy, and happy is showing up non-stop. But there's circumstantial happy and there's identity happy. And right now, while we're in here, it's a lot easier to focus on identity happy, while we're holding the vibe for for circumstantial happy as well. Both. You've got to be able to hold both in your life. You've got to look at the circumstances in your life and say, "Can I look at this in another angle?" Because if I'm constantly looking at circumstantial not happy, be very hard for me to create identity happy. And what's superficial happy? It's just like, you got flowers today, so you're circumstantial happy. Superficial happy. Oh, you got a sale, you're superficial happy. Oh, you, you don't have, you know, you have no blemishes on your face, you feel like you look.

Good today, superficial happy. We get to have those. Those are really important. We like it. Popsicles, superficial happy. "Yay, let's go for ice cream!" Superficial happy. "Yay!" But identity happy, that is something that changes the freaking world. Because then you look at the whole thing differently, and you manifest more and more and more.

And so, disappointment is the biggest feminine energy wound. And so, how a lot of people will go at it is they'll say, "Let me be identity sad, but be open to superficial happy." Because if superficial happy comes, I'll be surprised. And if sad things come, because I'm already sad, I won't be disappointed. That is the biggest booby prize in the entire world. That is like, "Let me be sad 99% of the time to make sure that when I'm sad, I'm not disappointed." And then the 1% when I'm happy, I'll be really happy. Instead of saying, "Let me be happy 50% of the time, and when I'm sad, I'll just be sad." But instead of being happy 1%, I'll be happy 51% of the time. I'll just have to handle disappointment. And yeah, it sucks, but I pick 51% over 1% any day. But I just have to handle disappointment.

But disappointment hits us because we say this to ourselves: "I am disappointed because I thought I was better than I am. I thought I deserved more than I got. And I'm stupid. I should never have believed that I was going to have that. I should never have believed." Instead of saying, "I still believe I'm all those things. Sometimes things don't work out. That doesn't mean that I'm not worthy. Sometimes people don't choose me. That doesn't make me not enough."

I'm telling you, it would be impossible for me, what I do, if I calculated how many people don't choose me. I've been doing this for a very long time. Not everybody chooses me. Not everybody continues to work with me. Not everybody says, "Melanie, I want to be a part of this with you." "Yes, Melanie, I choose you." "Yes, I trust you." "Yes, I want to continue to do this." "You've changed my life. I want to keep working with you." "Yes, you're great." "Yes, I pay you." "Yes, I validate your your need to to to believe that you're good enough by paying you." "Yes, I continue with you." I don't, I don't get that. I get a lot of, "You are so inspiring." I get a lot of, "This was great." "I'm not continuing." I get a lot of that. I get a lot more people not continuing long-term than that do. The odds are, there's so many people that know me. Not everybody keeps going with me. They, they don't.

If I made that my worth, I would not be able to do this. 355 of you are here now. But I, you know what? Business is like, you're here, you bought this invisible offer. This is amazing. And then I will make an offer for WAF, and I'll make an offer for Coach. Some of you will come, most of you won't. That's how it goes. I can't make that my worth, or else I'll never do this work. I've gotten so many more people say no, I can't, than people who said, "Let's do it."

I've got to believe that we can all do it, every time, no matter what. I've got to say, "I'll become even greater at my work until I'm able to affect more change in the people in my programs." I've got to say, "I'm working on me, and I'm becoming a greater mentor every single day. I'm helping people believe in themselves and in their futures. I'm making it more and more accessible to people, and they believe in themselves and they do this every day." And if, if I miss the mark, I will keep doing this, and I will keep doing this, and I will keep getting better and better.

It can't be about me in the same way. When a person doesn't pick you for a relationship, or a person doesn't pick you for, you know, they do one month of coaching with you and they decide not to do two months, or they do one year of coaching and they don't renew, or they try your trial sample but they don't buy the product. It can't mean about you. It can't. It's not that you're not good enough. But it can mean you get to be better at your job. It can mean that you can explain things better. It means that you can, you can become greater at your craft. But it can't mean that you are not good enough.

And this is what we do. And then we become further and further and further away from our mission. Because if I need you to tell me what my worth is, I'm blocked at what your worth is. If I believe my worth is what dictates things, then my worth is my worth, and I bring you with me. I, I help you believe in your worth by believing in my worth. In the other way around, you believing in what you're capable of makes me believe I'm capable of less. Can you see that?

You do a Facebook Live, there's 10 people on it. You make an offer, none of the people join. If you value your worth based on them valuing their worth, then they're the leaders, and they tell you, "I don't believe in me, so I'm not buying this." And then you decide, "I don't believe in me because they don't believe in them." So who's the leader?

But if you keep saying, "I believe in me, and I will keep refining my message, and I will speak greater, and I will figure out how to help people know what I know to be true, and I am not giving up. I can do greater. There's another way. There's another angle. I can, I can figure out how to help people feel what I'm feeling. There's another way." And you make it more about your journey and your courage and your communication and your, and you go there instead of your worth. It won't be long before one person all of a sudden says, "Okay, I believe in me. I believe in me." But that will be them calibrating to your belief, not you calibrating to their belief.

If you're a leader, you've got to be able to keep believing in you when people don't believe in themselves. And you've got to look at it from an objective standpoint. No matter what it is that you're selling, no matter what it is that you're offering, your conviction is your identity. If, if your conviction is contingent on another person's conviction, then you have no identity. You're depending on what you think. I am depending on what you think you're capable of. Then I'm nothing. My conviction, my knowing, my truth, my solidness in my identity, my my holding myself and not checking to see if you agree with my value because you agree with my value based on your value. And the people who say, "You're not perfect, so I don't agree with your value," or saying, "I don't let myself feel good about me. Every time I make a mistake, I see myself as less, so I can't really, I can't connect to that. I've got to put that down right away."

And the people who say, "You know what? If you're an imperfect human and you've managed to do this, and I already feel this about me, just by this, I'm going for it. I'm doing it." That is someone who believes in themselves. Neither way does it have anything to do with me. But the more I know about me, and the more I feel about me, the easier it is for me to communicate what I'm communicating. I have no fear because it doesn't mean anything about me if I try. If I give it my 100% and I fail, and I make that mean I'm not good enough, that's not the same as if I give it my 100% and, you know, and nobody says or nobody does anything, and then I realize there's a better way for me to communicate this. I know this is true. I'm not giving up. I will not give up until I communicate this effectively.

And I considered things like, you know, actors or or bands that were told no. "You guys suck." Meryl Streep was told she was too ugly. Oprah was told she would be radio at best. You know, there's bands that were told they suck and they'll never make good music. Walt Disney, 33 banks, they said, "We don't see the vision." Those were people who had, who didn't have as big of an imagination as the person they were presented with. Meryl Streep had a bigger vision, an imagination for herself, than the people who told her she wasn't pretty enough for the role. The Beatles had more vision than the people who heard their music and said no. Freddy Mercury, "Bohemian Rhapsody," that was like, "This will never make it." They had more vision than the people who said no. That's why they're still here. Walt Disney had more vision for Disney than every bank he went to. That's why Disney World exists.

You need to have more vision than the people who don't have the vision yet. Yet, I need to have more vision than the people who don't have the vision yet. And if I'm not finding a way to impress upon you how important this work is, if I don't manage to get you so aligned with yourself that you're like, "Holy freaking, like, what have I been doing? I'm in. I'm alive. Whoa. I'm doing this." If I don't have that in me, I got to get better at that. But not because I'm not good enough. I'm good enough. I'm living it. I'm doing it. I'm living everything I've ever wanted. I just want you to have it. And if I'm not doing that properly, that's what I've got to figure out how to do. I'm going to work on my communication. This is what I've worked on. I've worked on my English language. I've worked on my ability to be on camera. I've worked on my ability to hold disappointment. I've worked in my conviction in myself and not letting myself be affected by results. I've worked on the truth of who I am. I've worked on my identity. I've worked on one foot in front of the other. I've worked on forgiveness. I've worked on not letting my scars define who I am. Of not letting that scar tissue let nothing else into my heart. I've softened myself. I've healed. I've given myself one more shot. That's what I've worked on.

And then more people have said yes, not because I'm good enough or I'm worthy, but because I've found the way to break through to people because I have conviction in what I'm doing. The identity work is the conviction. So that nothing stops you. When you know this is who you are, nothing circumstantial can stop you because it's not validating you either. I don't need you to validate me. I just want you to get it so I can work on getting better at my craft all of my life. I can get better at how I speak and how I present, and I can shift my way, and I can shift. I can try a hundred different approaches, a thousand different approaches, 3,000 different approaches because my conviction is unshakable. And the method can be as flexible as it needs to be because the result does, does not define my conviction. The result just defines the method.

So how you build the conviction is in your identity. You've already started feeling a little bit different about yourself. I've been doing this for a while, and I've been consistently watching how it happens with this work. How does it happen with this work that I can, I can make an offer to a person and they say no, and I do not change how much I believe in my offer? I've had to practice that. How much I don't need people to say yes to believe in it. But I can still say, "I've got to refine my message. I've got to refine my energy. I've got to refine the way that I do this." Like, I can get better. That doesn't mean that I, in my core, am not good enough or that what I'm doing isn't right. It's like, how am I bringing it forward?

So that's when, when I want to talk to you about leadership, like, what does it matter to take a course about leadership if you're not convinced that leadership's going to help you bring your point across? If you don't believe in your point, if you don't believe in you, what's leadership going to give you? You know, if you don't, if you don't fundamentally decide, "I'm worth it. I get to make as much, as much money as I want. I just need to figure out how money works." If you're not there, how much money work is going to help you? If there's still a fundamental belief that you're not worthy and you're not capable, what's the money work going to do for you?

All the teachings have to go on top of this belief of like, "Teach me all there is. Is the opportunity for me to be more." I get it. There's nothing wrong. I literally just have the opportunity to learn all this stuff and find my edges and refine my way so I can affect change the way I want. Like now the communication makes sense because now I can, I can actually say what I want to say because I know what I want to say. Now the money work makes sense because I'm making money as a person who believes they can make money and who understands the value of making money and who has no story about what it means if I make money. Now teach me about leadership because I actually believe I can affect change onto the planet and it's going to be helpful for me to be a leader. Not, "Teach me how to be a leader and then maybe I'll be good enough." Anything that comes from that place just falls. It's got nothing to hold.

What makes this work is I'm excited about the future. Future because I know good things are coming. How do I know? Because it's who I am. I was born for big things, and I'm figuring out what those are. But there is not one doubt in my mind that this is what I'm born for. And the more results I see in my life that make me happy, the more things I'll want to talk about. And I've seen that firsthand. The minute I uncover something, I realize would be good for the world. I feel it. I live it. I want to give it. I'm generous. I want the world to be as happy as I am. And so the happier I am, the happier the world around me is. And I want to be great at expressing myself, and I want to be great at at at holding my truth, and I want to be great at being able to handle myself when other people are at war with their own identity near me. And they're, they're seeing my thriving as an invalidation of their failure. And they want to be right that things were hard for them. And the more things are easy for me, it threatens the validation of their truth. I see that now. I don't see that as my worth. I don't see that as my my problem. I don't see that as against me. I see my mission. I see it. It's not against anything. It's for me and whoever follows. And the more I'm convinced, and the more I'm clear, the easier this is for me. But it comes from my identity. This is who I am.

I am a miracle, born from a miracle, born from a miracle, born from a miracle. What it took for me to be here is beyond what I will ever be able to explain. I was born worthy. Nothing changed. Any story I've ever told myself was me calibrating to people who also believe there's something wrong with them. I can choose in one moment to just follow a different trajectory. And if I believe the best is yet to come, and I decide, "I am a happy person. I am a confident person most of the time." And yes, stuff happens. And then I just pick my life right back up. And I'm going to live this thing to the very end because I get it now. I know what the heck I'm doing here. I'm here to figure myself out so I can help people figure themselves out. Because this is it, and it's that simple, and it's that easy. And there's going to be things, and I'm going to triumph over certain things, and I'll be heartbroken over certain things, but I'm going to live. And it won't define me unless I decide it does. And I've decided the things that define me make me extraordinary. So I'll pick up what I want to keep, and I'll put the rest down. I'll try stuff on, and that'll be it. I either keep it or I put it down. This will be my life. And at the end, I will have built it. I will have shaped it. I made it. It will be nothing that I am that I don't like because I will have decided what to keep and what to put down. And I will be a model of what's possible. And I will not take it personally when people don't think they can do this work. It'll just mean that there's more to come for me, that I can shine brighter, that there's skills to learn. And that doesn't mean that there's anything missing about me. It just means I'm enough. But if I want to help other people unlock, then there's more brightness to sing, there's more brightness to shine, there's more for me to do. If I want other people to get this, my transformation is your transformation. My possibilities are your possibilities. It serves me, it serves you, it serves us that I shine. The more evidence we have on this planet of people who break free, the more people will break free because we need evidence. And we look for evidence every freaking day. "Be the change you want to see in the world." All these sentences start to make sense. All the things you may have heard, the superficial terms, everything. Now you're like, "Gosh, this was wisdom. I just wasn't wise. I missed it. Now I get it." Everything you've ever heard that makes sense starts to make sense when, when you're on this frequency. This is who we are.

So now, what? Why were you brought here? Why have this conversation now? What? So I want you to contemplate this for yourself in this moment. This is your, your homework for tonight. Can you see that the easiest way to get anything done on this planet is to believe in yourself just a little bit more? To believe in what you're doing just a little bit more? To be a little less shakable when something goes wrong? To be a little more sturdy in your beliefs? If you can do that, you'll attract all the people who are also sturdy. And then the more, and the people who aren't sturdy will just be affected. When more people are sturdy, like, the truth is, if 2,000 of us lead this program onto the internet, into our families, into our lives, and live by this, the shift that will occur on the planet will be like a jolt. Your kids will feel it. Your partners will feel it. Everybody will feel it. They'll start to see something else as possible. And if you continue to live in alignment with this, we really make a shift.

Because one of the biggest issues with personal development, when people take personal development, if it will fix them, is they don't do it like a student. They don't do it like, "Okay, let's go now." They don't do it like, "Let's learn." They do it like, "I did it." And it lasts as long as it lasts until the rest of the world starts to influence you more than you influence the world. And then people have evidence that it lasts only for a minute. And that has become the conversation about personal development. People come out of there all hyped up and then, and then they think it's enough. Like they could shower once and never stink again.

This is all about what I realize when I put myself in the correct environment. What I'm capable of thinking, who I'm I'm capable of being, how I think, how I feel, what I see, how I see people, how I act. Like, this is not a joke. This is not a game. This is like, you just tested a theory. Can you see what it did? So now what? Like, I've been doing this work. I haven't put it down for 10 years. I've done more than I ever thought I ever could in all of my life. And I'm not asking you to like, remortgage your houses. Literally, I'm, I'm making opportunities for you to keep going at this for $222 a month. Like, it's not even 10 bucks a day. Like, you can do this. Do you have the identity of someone who says, "I'm not putting this down now that I found it?" And it won't mean anything if you don't, other than you didn't do it. If you do it, it'll mean you did it. It'll mean whatever comes next. It'll mean, it'll mean, it'll mean. There's nothing wrong with not doing it. It's just everything becomes something else when you do do it. That's what I wish people knew about this work. There's nothing wrong with us for us not doing it. It's just what's right when we do. Don't do it because there's something wrong with you. There isn't.

So I want you to think about this for yourself. And actually, if you can put this in different cont, different context. Like, watch a kid at school go through grade one and nail grade one and then say, "I don't think I need school anymore. I did grade at grade one." What would that look like? If someone said, "I passed the first exam of the year and I don't think I want to pass anymore. I think I just did good for grade one, first exam of the year, I'm set and I, I'm done." Like, let's just run this wave. How well would they do it the rest of their lives? If you could, if you could speak to the student you were, would you do school differently? If you could put yourself right back into first grade and you could say, "Enjoy school because this is actually some great stuff here. Just listen. Here's how you could listen." Like, if you could, could you say something different to yourself to help you learn better? Would you, would you go through life differently? Would you, could you talk to yourself differently? In 20 years from now, you'll be talking to yourself now going, "Gosh, if you had just not stopped that, where would you have been?" Or you'll just be where you are, or you'll have done great things. Life is going to happen. Who's it going to happen to? That's what identity work is about. Life is going to happen, but to who?

I could be experiencing 2024 as the Melanie layer that had crooked beliefs about what life could be, or I can experience 2024 as the Melanie layer I've built. Life is happening, and it's happening for me now. And that's why things work because they're working because they're happening for me. They're happening to me. I built this woman. I built her every day. I chose, I chose, I chose, I chose. I slipped, I failed, I fell, I rebuilt, I course-corrected. But I built this version of me. You can build yourself. You've tested it in the last few days, and I've seen you shift. I've seen your writing be extraordinary. I've seen you express yourself like a freaking genius. I've seen you show compassion like five-star compassion. I've seen you break through from things in an instant. I've seen you realize things in your sleep, in your waking days. I've seen you change the way you have conversations with people. I've seen you notice little things in your life in days. You can do this, and you can do this more when you're surrounded by people who also believe they can do this.

So I want you to really just contemplate this for yourself. Can you get behind this? "I am happy most of the time. Sometimes, obviously, things happen. That's life. But I'm a happy person. I'm excited about the future because I know happiness is on the horizon. Gratitude is on the horizon. I am worthy. I was born worthy, and nothing has changed. I decide my worth." Because after this course, I'm a, I know what it's like to see value and worth in people, and I see it in me, and I'm never putting that down. I am worthy. And I will not ask someone else who hasn't even understood their own value to value me and to appraise me. They don't even know what they're worth yet. I'm not asking a person who doesn't know how to tell a diamond from a stone to appraise me. I am choosing who gets to have a say on my worth and my value, and that is me. I build this. I hold myself in high esteem, and that creates my identity.

The results I have most of the time are connected to other people's identity. If I believe in people and their power, I attract people and their power. If I believe people are wobbly and struggling and incapable, I tend to attract those people. But the more I believe in me, the more I attract people who believe in themselves because we're magnets for each other. And I believe, and I'm not putting that down either. And if for some reason I can't affect change on a person, I won't take that personally. Like, "I'm not enough." That doesn't take away what I've done for me. All it does is it opens the gateway for me to become a better communicator, greater at expressing what I do, more open-minded, more compassionate, a better listener. Maybe I missed something. And what would be important for people to change? Let me study this. Let me become greater at this. Let me, let me learn how I can be helpful. But not how I get to become a better person. That was not what this was about. Me being good at my business isn't about whether I'm good enough. It's about whether me being good enough is translating. Whether I'm actually affecting what I want. Can I do that?

I want you to see if you can feel squeaky clean about dialogue. Can you get yourself to that point of power in your life? Because if you can, the sky isn't even the limit. It doesn't matter what has happened. It doesn't matter where you failed. It doesn't matter anything because you did all of those things as another person. That identity is complete. That chapter has been tested and tried, and you're entering a new one. None of the evidence that you created matters anymore because it wasn't from the same person. This all starts new as of now. You don't even need to take them with you.

I want you to feel the most solid you've ever felt, not because other people give you the validation to to say yes to your stuff or do what you want or treat you with respect. Most people don't treat themselves with respect. They don't even say yes to themselves for what they want. We've got to be who we are independent of what other people do. Then other people start to rise in our presence. When I have the conviction to be who I am regardless of what you do, somehow you change. That's how the world changes. If I need your validation to change, the world stays the same. If I change regardless of what you think of me, you change. It's the weirdest thing.

So trust in yourself. Trust that you manifested this course for a reason. And contemplate if there's anything still that feels like a gap. Tomorrow is our last Q&A, then we will have a celebration call where I have a last piece of the puzzle for you. And then we're going to have a shop with me on the fifth. So you have another, another opportunity to ask questions. Anything that comes to mind that's like a missing link for you. But I also want you to try this on. If there is no question, there's no question. Sometimes the identity is, "I'm confused." Sometimes the identity is, "Let me just make sure, test and make sure there even is some of that." There might not be, and that would also be okay. If you're like, "Holy pickles, Harry Potter, I don't even have a question. I'm just excited to see what happens tomorrow and on the celebration call." That would also be perfect.

Now, the results in your life, and this is the one piece I want, I want to say to you. The results in your life have also been a byproduct of who you were. The issue is that they are in your physical world, and they can act as a reminder. So if you are in a relationship that's not really working, and they didn't take the course with you, even though you're super empowered, you go home tonight, it's going to feel like, "Yeah, but I'm still have this relationship." If you're like, "I'm in. I want to do the whole things." And you look at your bank account and you're like, "Yeah, but I still have this." What I want to remind you of is how many stories start with a bank account, broken relationship, and the world crumbling, and end with the greatest story ever told. You also have to decide that's in the cards for you. That's part of the new identity. It doesn't matter where I start. What matters is where I go. You've got to believe that.

And I know it's hard. I've been there. I've been in a broken relationship, at odds of my family, with no money, a bankruptcy, no high school education, a really strong French Canadian accent, only an ability to speak two languages meshed together, um, uh, no confidence, a belief that people don't like me, people don't care about me, and I don't matter. And from that, I became this person. One day at a time, one step at a time, with everything I've taught you in this program. If I can do it, you can do it. And I have no fear for you. It doesn't matter how bad you think it is for you. I have no fear for you. All I can think about is what a great story this is going to make. I have no fear. I've seen it. I've seen worse. I've seen it all. And I've seen us change. Can you, can you take that on? Have no fear for me. Worst case, it'll just be the greatest story ever told. See if you can try this on. Enjoy this feeling of power. If you can tap into it. If you have a little bit of confusion or something up, like, it's okay. Just see how long you can hold on to this power. You're onto something. Something's happening. Let it be happening without thinking.

If the old part of you still has a question, there's something wrong with you. If you have a question still, don't beat yourself up. Ask your question. There's a reason I didn't just end on this high and say, "And now there shouldn't be any more questions." And if there's questions, you've failed. You haven't. Ask me your questions. It's a Q&A tomorrow. Just notice where your mind will say, "Oh yeah, but see, I should probably feel all empowered." And instead, "Instead, I still have this question." Ask the question. You're okay. Evolution and growth over a lifetime, one foot at a time. We've got this. I have no fear for you. None. Even if you want me to, even if you wish you could tell me the story in a way that I would feel terror for you, you won't. It won't work. I have too much conviction. But I can accept that you have fear because I've been there. But you will not make me fear for you, no matter what you tell me.

So I love you. You're beautiful. You smell nice. Let this integrate. Have this moment for yourself. And then put whatever question you have on the thread, and I will see you again tomorrow for another session. Thank you for this incredible call. You're amazing, and I will see you so soon.

Our identity, as we know it, begins to form from the instant we take our first breath. We start off as a blank slate, an open book, waiting to be written. Our early years are filled with first steps, first sights, first discoveries. Each of these moments shapes us, adds a brushstroke to the canvas of our character. As we move through adolescence, the picture becomes more complex. Little by little, we become a mosaic, a multifaceted collage, a puzzle formed from the fragments of our life.

There comes a day where we grasp the paintbrush ourselves. We realize that we need not be defined solely by circumstance, that we have the power to paint our own future. We awaken to find that we can reshape our identity. Our identity continues to evolve, but now as an intentional work of art, guided by our own hand. We are the artist and the masterpiece.

It is time to step into a greater identity. This is the gateway to your alternate life.