Transcription
[Applause] Sir, you are most welcome, and thank you very much. You accepted our invitation, and today, sir, I am in a great dilemma. Why? Firstly, I don't understand what to call you, sir. Should I call you Guru Ji, Swami Ji, how should I address you? Oh, first of all, I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for inviting me here today, you and your production company. Thank you. For The Kapil Sharma Show. I mean, they keep everyone laughing. There is so much sorrow in the world, but they have taken on the task of reducing its sorrow. Haven't they? It's a blessing, sir. You also make people laugh a lot. I try, sir. They asked me what name to address me by. So, I often say, call me by any name. When you are called with love from the heart, any name works. But, but when you give this liberty, this freedom, to call by any name, then oh my. By what names have I been called, and what a mess has been made of my name. Well, I went to a program. They said that today, Gopal Gopal has come amongst us. I mean, my head is round. Gold Gopal. Well, I went to America. Yes. In America, they said, "So we have amongst us all of us, Gold Gopal Das." This was still okay. Gol was fine, Gold was also okay. Then I went to a Marathi program in Mumbai. Okay. So, in the Marathi program, they said, "Today, Gad Gopal Das has come amongst us." So, Ghod is also a bit sweet. Okay. I'll tell you the most terrifying one. Yes. "Today, Ghor Gopal Das has come amongst us." Now, I am not Ghor. Yes. Wow. What a thing, sir. You know, I was confused about what to call you, sir? Our production people were very confused. Normally, film people come here, sir. So, they ask for burgers, pizzas, they order all this. Today, they came and asked me, sir, would you like fruit, would you like milk? I thought, sir, you have come to our show today. You also believe that laughing in life is very important, right? Absolutely, 100%, laughing is very important, sir. Because sorrow is already overflowing. I mean, how many people here have problems in their lives? Everyone. Okay, those who are not raising their hands are expecting me to believe them. Just look at that. Yes, there will be problems in life, won't there? Life, my dear, there will be difficulties. Absolutely. Otherwise, after death, you don't even feel the burning. Oh my, oh my, what a thing. I have seen, sir, that you have 5 million followers on Instagram. Other social media is separate, sir. So, my question to you was that the guru who teaches the world to stay away from worldly attachments, when he wakes up in the morning, do you go and check Instagram to see how many followers you have gained overnight? Because she checks hers daily. She checks every hour. This person lies so much. The phone must be kept down. Quiet. Okay, let me tell you one thing, don't believe anything he says. Whatever he says about me, the comment is false. Whoever lies is bitten by a crow. Yes, will a crow bite? And Navjot Singh Sidhu sahib used to sit here. Dinesh also got him out. He has no hand in this. This is also true. Thank you. How many of you have ever fasted? Like a religious fast? Has anyone observed Roza here? Yes. Has anyone observed Janmashtami, Navratri? Has anyone observed Parushan? Parushan. Right? See, let me tell you one thing. It's cut to 2023, sir. If you want to fast in 2023, do one day without a smartphone, without Instagram, without WhatsApp, without Facebook, without LinkedIn, without Twitter, without Snapchat, without Google, without TV. One day, one day, one day, try fasting like this, and God will come down and say, "Stop, you crazy person, you'll make me cry." [Applause] Wow, so this is indeed said in jest by sir, but it's a very important point. And because Instagram has entered our lives so much, sir, a person weighing 250 grams has become like that, because Instagram is everywhere, and young children are there, of course. There are many people who don't detach. Shooting is going on, and separately, during breaks, madam brings her phone. And tell me, how are you then? I mean, it's the limit. I promote my show. When? Yes, big promotion. You have 4 crore followers, right? Don't be so arrogant, Kapil. No, when have I been arrogant? Have I ever said I have 44 million? Never said it. Okay, sir has a quote, "When people smile, it doesn't mean they are doing good. It just means they have chosen to smile." So, sir, what do you think, is it in a person's hands? Can they decide themselves whether they want to be happy, or is it in their wife's hands, or their boss's hands, or their girlfriend's hands? I have always seen you smiling. Is the reason for this not that you are alone? Once, once on August 15th, someone sent me a message, and you know that kind of message, where there's a long line written at the top, then dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots. So, it was written, "First scroll down and read the message. Yes, only if you are single." Oh! So, I said, I qualify. So, I scrolled down. Dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots, dots. It was August 15th. At the bottom, it was written, "Happy Independence Day." Now, let me tell you one thing, sir. See, if we hand over the responsibility of our happiness to someone else, we will remain sad for our entire lives. Okay. And that's why, the more we take control of our emotions and feelings into our own hands, the happier we will be, and then whether it's your wife or your boss, you can love them as they are. Otherwise, people are just pressing the remote, the remote control of the world, in others' hands. Don't give the remote control of your emotions into others' hands. Gradually, bring that remote control back home. Okay, I saw a video of sir where he was talking about girlfriends and boyfriends and also singing a song, "Why are you smiling so much? What sorrow are you hiding?" Forgive my impertinence, sir. I mean, do you have the experience of being a student because you have also studied Electrical Engineering in college, or have you ever fallen in love? Have you ever... Sir Kapil is taking a lot of liberty today. He always does. He says, "Yes, this innocent, bald, saintly person has fallen into my hands." Today, I will take equal liberty and tease him a lot. I was from an engineering college. I studied Electrical Engineering. Yes. And I became so engrossed in studying Electrical Engineering, so engrossed, that I didn't have time for love and romance. And when my engineering degree was finished, I fell in love with what I am doing now. Wow. So, it went from here to here. But today, those who are in love, those whose hearts are broken, those who sing "Channa Mereya," those who sing "Ae Dil Hai Mushkil," they come to me. To cry. When even "Ae Dil Hai Mushkil" doesn't give peace, when even "Channa Mereya" doesn't give peace, then where should they go? Right, Ghor Gopal Das Ji. One person had a heartbreak. Okay. They were in a relationship for 10 years, and she had drunk so much. She was moderately drunk that day. Okay. She was completely tipsy, completely drunk. In common man's language, yes, yes, yes, completely tipsy, drunk. I won't say it. So, she abused his parents terribly, with dirty words, while drunk. Okay. He was moderately drunk. So, he understood that this girl is good, she gets along with me, but what are her thoughts about my parents? So, the next day, he said, "We will break up." So, the breakup happened. He came to me. A 10-year relationship. Without asking, he rested his head on my lap and started crying. Everyone is like this. Everyone is like this. I said, my brother, calm down. Just because you got sour grapes doesn't mean all grapes are sour. [Applause] Then he says a sher to me. Okay. He says, "Dil boli aankh se, achha, dil boli aankh se, tum dekha karo kam. Dekhte ho tum aur tadapte hain hum." (Heart said to the eyes, okay, heart said to the eyes, you look less. You look, and we suffer.) [Applause] Then, crying, he continued, "Aankh boli dil se, hum, aankh boli dil se, tum chaha karo kam. Chahte ho tum aur rote hain hum." (Eyes said to the heart, we, eyes said to the heart, you desire less. You desire, and we cry.) So, I have never fallen in love with anyone, but by resolving these episodes of love, I have become a love coach. Ha.