Transcription
May 9th, 1899. Vol. 2. Threat of Chastisements.
Jesus gives his bitter breath to Louisa this morning. I was in a sea of affliction because of the loss of Jesus. After much hardship, Jesus came and drew so close to me that I could not even see him. He reached the point of placing his forehead upon mine, of leaning his face on mine, and so with all the other members.
Now, while Jesus was in this position, I said to him, "My adorable Jesus, you do not love me anymore." And he, "If I did not love you, I would not be so close to you." And I added, "How can you say that you love me if you no longer let me suffer as before? I'm afraid you do not want me to be in this state anymore. At least, free me from also the bother of the Confessor."
While I was saying this, it seemed that Jesus would not pay attention to my words, but rather he made me see a multitude of people who were committing every kind of evil. Indignant with them, Jesus would make different kinds of contagious diseases swooped down into their midst, and many would die. Blackest charcoal, it seemed that Jesus would exterminate that multitude of people from the face of the earth.
While seeing this, I prayed Jesus to pour his bitterness into me so as to spare the people, but he would not pay attention to me in this either. And replying to the words I had said before, he added, "The greatest chastisement I can give you, the priests, and the people is to free you from this state of suffering. My justice would pour out in all of its fury because it would find no opposition. This is so true that the worst evil for someone is to be given an office and then to be removed from it. It would be better for him had he not been admitted to that office, since by abusing it and not profiting from it, he has rendered himself unworthy of it."
Then Jesus continued to come quite a few times today, but so afflicted as to move one to pity and to tears, maybe even the stones. I tried to console him as much as I could. Now I would embrace him, now I would sustain his head, which was in great pain, now I would say to him, "Heart of my heart, Jesus, it has never been your usual way to appear so afflicted to me. If other times you made yourself seen afflicted by pouring it into me, you would immediately change appearance, but now I am being denied the opportunity to give you this relief. Who would have thought, after you have consented to pour and to share your sufferings with me for so long, and you yourself did so much to dispose me, that now I would have to be deprived of it? Suffering for love of you was my only relief. It was suffering that made me bear my exile from heaven, but now, being deprived of it, I feel I have no place on which to lean anymore. Life becomes tedious to me. How please, O Holy Spouse, but love it, good my dear life, oh please let the pains come back to me and give me suffering. Do not look at my unworthiness and at my grave sins, but at your mercy, which has not exhausted itself."
While I was pouring myself out with Jesus, he drew closer to me and told me, "My daughter, it is my justice that wants to pour itself out over the creatures. The number of sins and men is almost complete, and justice wants to come out to make pomp of its fury and to find reparation for the injustices of men. Look to show you how embittered I am and to content you a little bit, I want to pour only my breath into you." And so, drawing his lips near mine, he sent me his breath, which was so bitter that I felt my mouth, my heart, and my whole person being intoxicated. If his mere breath was so bitter, what must be the rest of Jesus? He left me with such pain that I felt my heart pierced through.
May 9th, 1903. Louisa sees the mystery of the Most Holy Trinity in the form of three suns.
After I had gone through days not only of privation but also of disturbance, this morning, as I was yet more disturbed about my miserable state, adorable Jesus, on coming, told me, "By being restless, you have disturbed my sweet rest. Yes, you do not let me rest any more." Who can say how mortified I was left, hearing that I had deprived Jesus Christ of rest? In spite of this, I calmed down for a few hours, but then I found myself more restless than before, to the point that I myself do not know where I will end up this time.
After those few words spoken by Jesus, I found myself outside of myself, and in looking into the vault of the heavens, I saw three suns. One seemed to set in the east, another in the west, and the third in the south. The splendor of the rays that they sent forth was so great that they united with one another in such a way as to become one. I seemed to see the mystery of the Most Holy Trinity and man formed with the three powers in its image. I also understood that for one who stayed in that light, his will would be transformed in the Father, his intellect in the Son, his memory in the Holy Spirit. How many things I understood, but I am unable to manifest them.
May 9th, 1905. Volume 6. The soul who was united to grace can do what death must do to her nature.
Continuing in my usual state, it seemed to me that my adorable Jesus was coming out from within my interior and with sweet and affable voice he was saying, "And why, my daughter, can the soul united to Grace not do in advance everything that death must do to her nature? That is, making it die in advance for love of God to everything to which it will have to die. But only those who dwell continuously with my grace come to have this blessed death, because by living with God, it is easier for them to die to everything that is fleeting. And as the soul lives with God and dies to all the rest, her very nature comes to anticipate the privileges which must enrich her at the resurrection. That is, she will feel spiritual eyes deified and incorruptible, in addition to all the goods in which the soul will take part, feeling herself the partaker in all the privileges of divine life. In addition to this, there is the distinction of glory which these souls will have in heaven. They will be so different from the others as heaven is different from the earth." Having said this, he disappeared.
May 9th, 1907. Volume 7. Death and purgatory of Louisa's parents.
It has been a few months since I wrote, and with great repugnance and only to obey, I begin to write again. Oh, what a weight I feel, only at the thought that I could say to my beloved Jesus, "See how I love you more, and how my love grows, since for love of you alone I submit myself to this sacrifice." And for as long as it lasts, I can also say that I love you more. Thinking that I can say to my Jesus that I love him more, I feel the strength to make the sacrifice to obey.
Now, since I do not remember everything distinctly, I will tell of the past all together and confusedly, starting from where I left. When I was praying that he would take my mother to paradise without her touching purgatory, then on March 19th, the day dedicated to St. Joseph, in the morning, while I was in my usual state, my mother passed from this life into the sphere of eternity. And bless of Jesus, allowing me to see her as he was taking her, told me, "My daughter, the Creator takes his creature." At that moment, I felt I was being invested inside and out with a fire so alive that I felt my bowels, my stomach, and all the rest burning, and if I would have something, it would convert it into fire, and I would be forced to bring it up immediately after I had swallowed it. This fire consumed me and kept me alive. Oh, how I understood the devouring fire of purgatory, which while consuming the soul gives her life. The fire does the office of food, of water, of death, and of life.
But I was happy in that state. However, since I had only seen that Jesus had taken her, but he had not shown me where he had taken her, my happiness was not full. And from my very sufferings, I would draw concern, since those would be the sufferings of my mother if she was in purgatory. And seen blessed Jesus, who in these days has almost never left me, I would cry and say to him, "My sweet love, tell me, where did you take her? I am content that you have taken her away from us because you keep her with yourself, but if you do not have her with yourself, this I do not tolerate, and I will cry so much until you content me." And he seemed to enjoy my crying. He would embrace me, he would sustain me, he would dry my tears and would say to me, "My daughter, do not fear, calm yourself." And once you have calmed yourself, I will let you see her, and you will be very pleased. Besides, you can have the certainty that I have contented you from the fire that you feel.
But I would continue to cry, especially when I would see, since I felt in my interior that something was still lacking to the beatitude of my mother. So much so that the people who surrounded me, who had come because of the death of my mother and seeing me cry so much, thinking that I was crying because of the death of my mother, were almost scandalized, thinking that I had moved away from the divine well, when more than ever I was swimming in the sphere of the Divine Will. But I do not appeal to any human tribunal, because it is false, only to the divine, which is full of truth and good. Jesus was not condemning me; on the contrary, he would compassionate me and in order to sustain me, he would come more often, almost giving me a reason to cry more, because if he would not come, with whom was I to cry? In truth, what I wanted, the people were right, because they judged from the outside. And then, after all, since I am so very cativa (meaning bad), it is no wonder that the others would be scandalized by me.
Then, after quite a few days, as good Jesus came, he told me, "My daughter, be consoled, for I want to tell you and show you where your mother is. Since before and after she passed away, you have suffered continuously that which I earned and endured for her good in the course of my life, she partakes in what I did and enjoys my humanity. Only the divinity is concealed from her, but it will shortly be unveiled to her as well. And the fire you feel and your prayers have served to exempt her from any other pain of senses, which all must have, because my justice, receiving satisfaction from you, could not take it from both."
At that moment, I seem to see my mother with an immensity which had no boundaries, and in it there were many delights and joys for as many words, thoughts, sighs, sufferings, heartbeats, in some for everything that the most holy Humanity of Jesus Christ contained. I understood that it is a second paradise for the blessed, and in order to enter the paradise of the divinity, all must pass through this paradise of the humanity of Christ. Therefore, the fact of having touched no other purgatory had been a most singular privilege for my mother, reserved for very few. However, I understood that even though she was not amid torments, but rather amid delights, her happiness was not perfect, but almost halved. May the Lord be always thanked.
I continued to suffer for 12 days, so much so that I reduced myself to a thread of life, but since obedience intervened so that this thread of life might not break, I returned to my natural state. I don't know, it seems that this obedience has a magic arc over me, and that soon the Lord will make it lose its prestige in order to take me with himself. I felt discontentment because obedience places itself in the middle so as not to let me pass into heaven and give.
Jesus told me, "My daughter, the Blessed in heaven give me much glory because of the perfect union of their will with mine. For their life is a product of my will. There is so much harmony between them and myself that their breath, their breathing, their movements, their joys, and everything that constitutes their beatitude is the effect of my will. However, I tell you that for the soul who is still a pilgrim, if she is united to my will in such a way that she never detaches from it, her life is of heaven, and I receive from her the same glory, or rather, I take more pleasure and delight. Because what the Blessed do, they do without sacrifice and amid delights, while what the pilgrim souls do, they do with sacrifice and amid sufferings. And wherever there is sacrifice, I take more pleasure and I am more delighted. And the very Blessed who live in my volition, since the soul who is still a pilgrim and lives in my will forms one life with them, participate in the pleasure I take from the pilgrim soul."
Another time, I remember that since I feared that my state might be a work of the devil, good Jesus told me, "My daughter, the devil can also speak about virtue, but while speaking about virtue, he casts repugnance and hatred for virtue itself into the interior of the soul, so the poor soul finds herself in contradiction and without the strength to practice good. On the other hand, when it is I who speak, since I am the Truth, my word is full of life. It is not sterile, but therefore, while I speak, I infuse love for her too and I produce that very virtue in the soul. In fact, the truth is strength, it is light, it is support, and a second nature for the soul who lets herself be guided by the truth."
I continue by saying that only about ten days had passed from the death of my mother when my father fell gravely ill, and the Lord made me understand that he too would die. I gave him to him as a gift in advance, and I repeated the same plea which I made for my mother, that he should not let him touch purgatory. But the Lord showed himself more reluctant and would not listen to me. I feared greatly, not for his salvation, because good Jesus had made me a solemn promise almost 15 years before that of my family and of those who belong to me, no one would be lost. But I feared very much about purgatory. I kept praying, but good Jesus would hardly come.
Only on the day my father died, that is, after about 15 days of illness, that blessed Jesus make himself seen, how the nine clothed in white, as if he were in feast, and he told me, "Today I am waiting for your father, and for love of you, I will let myself be found not as a judge, but as a benign father. I will welcome him in my arms." I insisted about purgatory, but he did not listen to me, and he disappeared.
After my father died, I did not have any new suffering, as had happened with my mother, and from this I understood that he had gone to purgatory. I prayed and prayed again, but Jesus wouldn't make himself seen, flashing by without giving me time. And what's more, I could not even cry because I had no one with whom to cry, and the one who alone could listen to my crying would run away from me. Adorable judgments of God in His ways!
Then, after two days of interior pains, while I was seeing bless of Jesus and asking him about my father, I felt he was behind the shoulders of Jesus Christ, as though bursting into tears and asking for help, and then they disappeared. I was left lacerated in my soul, and I kept praying. Finally, after six days, as I was in my usual state, I found myself outside of myself, inside a church, and there were many purging songs. I was praying to our Lord that he would at least let my father come inside a church to make his purgatory, because I could see that the souls in the churches received continuous reliefs from the prayers and masses that are said, and much more from the real presence of Jesus in the sacrament. It seems that that is a continuous refreshment for them.
At that moment, I saw my father venerable in his appearance, and our Lord let me place him near the tabernacle. So it seems I was left less lacerated in my interior. I remember confusedly that on another day when blessed Jesus came, he made me comprehend the preciousness of suffering, and I prayed that he would let everyone comprehend the good contained in suffering. And he said to me, "My daughter, the cross is a thorny fruit which is bothering and prickly on the outside, but once the thorns in the cortex are removed, one finds a precious and delicious fruit. But only one who has the patience to bear the bothers of the creakings can arrive at discovering the secret of the preciousness and flavor of that fruit, and only one who has come to discover this secret looks at it with love and goes in search of this fruit with avidity, without caring about the pricking, while all the others look at it with contempt and despise it."
And I, "But my sweet Lord, what is this secret contained in the fruit of the cross?" And he, "It is the secret of eternal beatitude, because in the fruit of the cross there are many little coins which circulate only to enter into heaven, and with these little coins the soul is enriched and makes herself blessed for eternity." The rest I remember confusedly, and I feel it is not orderly in my mind, therefore I move on and I stop here.
May 9th, 1912. Vol. 11. Consummation of all our being in love.
This morning, finding myself in my usual state, I was thinking about how we can consume ourselves in love. My blessed Jesus came and told me, "My daughter, if the will wants only me, if the intelligence is interested in knowing only me, if the memory remembers nothing other than me, here they are, the three powers of the soul being consumed in love. The same for the senses: if one speaks only about me, if he hears only all that regards me, if he enjoys only my things, if he works and walks only for me, if his heart loves only me, if his desires desire only me, here it is, the consummation of love formed by the senses."
"My daughter, love has a sweet enchantment and it renders the soul happy and blind to all that is not love, making her all eyes for all that is love. Therefore, for the one who loves, whatever her will may encounter, if it is love, she becomes all eyes; if not, she becomes blind, stupid, and does not understand anything. The same for her tongue: if she has to speak about love, she feels many eyes of light flowing through her word and becomes eloquent; if not, she begins to stammer and ends up dumb. And so for all the rest."
May 9th, 1913. Vol. 11. Jesus and his celestial mama, especially during his passion.
While praying, I was thinking about that moment in which Jesus leaves his most holy Mother to go and suffer his passion. I said to myself, "How is it possible that Jesus could separate himself from his dear mama, and she from Jesus?" Blessed Jesus told me, "My daughter, surely there could not be a separation between me and my sweet mama. The separation was only apparent. She and I were fused together, and the fusion was so great that I remained with her while she came with me. One can say that there was a sort of bilocation. This happens also to the souls when they are truly united with me. If, while praying, they leave prayer, enter into their souls as life, a sort of fusion and bilocation occurs. I bring them with me wherever I am, and I remain with them."
"My daughter, you cannot comprehend well what my beloved mama was for me. Coming upon earth, I could not be without heaven, so my heaven was my mama. Electricity would flow between us, such that my mother had not a thought which she did not draw from my mind. This drawing for me of will, desire, action, step, in some of everything, formed the sun, the stars, the moon in this heaven, together with all the possible delights that a creature can give me, and that she herself can enjoy. Oh, how I delighted in this heaven! Oh, how I felt relieved and repaid for everything! Even the kisses that my mama gave me enclosed the kiss of all humanity returning to me, the kiss of all creatures. I felt my sweet mama everywhere. I felt her in my breath; if it was labored, she would release it. I felt her in my heart; if it wasn't embittered, she would sweeten it. I felt her in my step; if I was tired, she would give me strength and rest. Who can tell you how much I felt her in my passion? I felt her at every scourging, at every thorn, at every wound, at every drop of blood, everywhere fulfilling her office of true mother. Have souls reciprocated me? If they drew everything from me, how many heavens and mothers would I have on earth?"
May 9th, 1924. Volume 16. The chastisements will purify the earth so that the Divine Will may reign.
However many times Jesus is appeased in seeing his Divine Will within a creature upon earth, even more, he lives hidden in her as within another Humanity of his. I spend my days in most profound bitterness and in deep silence on the part of Jesus, and with almost total probation of his adorable presence. These are unspeakable pains that I am suffering, and I believe that it is better to keep them in silence so as not to embitterment I'm even more so.
After much hardship, this morning blessed Jesus made himself seen in my interior, filling me completely with himself. And I, surprised by his unexpected presence, wanted to lamented Jesus about his privation, but he did not give me the time to do it, and all afflicted told me, "My daughter, how embittered I feel! Creatures put in me three nails, not to my hands, but to my heart and breasts, which give me pains of death. They are preparing three conspiracies, one uglier than the other, and in these conspiracies, they are taking aim at my Church. In his evil, man does not want to surrender; on the contrary, he wants to hurl himself even more along his race."
And as he was saying this, he showed secret meetings in which some were plotting how to assail the Church, some how to cause new wars, and some new revolutions. How many horrifying evils could be seen! And my sweet Jesus continued, "My daughter, is it not right that my justice take arms against man to strike him and to almost destroy the many lives which dirty the earth, and that it may disappear entire regions together with them, so that the Earth may be purified by so many piss difference lives and by so many incarnate devils which disguised under a thin of apparent good or plotting ruins for the Church and for society? Do you think that my absence from you is something trivial? No, no. On the contrary, the longer is my absence from you, the graver will be the chastisements. Kenda, and remember how many things I have told you about my will, so the evils, the destructions will serve to fulfill what I have told you, that my will may come to reign upon earth. But it wants to find it purified, and in order to purify it, destructions are needed. Therefore, patience, my daughter, and never leave my will, because everything that happens within you will serve the work that my will may have its dominion and may come triumphantly to reign in the midst of men."
At these words of Jesus, I remained resigned, yes, but highly afflicted. The thought of the grave evils of the world and his privation are like a double-edged knife which kills me and, to my greater torment, does not make me die.
Then the following morning, my sweet Jesus made himself seen in my interior, as though confined within me, and told me, "My daughter, I am posted within you, and from your interior I look at what the world is doing. In you, I find the heir of my will, and I feel I can be there with the decorum which befits my person. It is true that my will is everywhere, but oh, how different it is to find it as the life of the creature and the creature living in it. In the midst of creatures, in the other places, my will finds itself isolated, offended, unable to carry out the goods it contains and to form a life all from itself and for itself. On the other hand, wherever it finds a creature who is willing to have no other life but my will, it finds company, it is loved, it carries out the goods it contains and enjoys placing them in common with the soul in order to form a life from itself and for itself. And in finding my own things in the soul, that is, my sanctity, my light, and my very will acting in her, I find myself with honors and decorum, just as I was in my humanity when I lived on earth, in which my divinity, living in it, was as though posted and covered with the garment of my humanity. In the same way, I cover myself with the garment of the soul who does my will. I live hidden within her as in my own center, and from within her I look at the evils of creatures and I cry and I pray for them. And in seeing that one of their stock possesses my will also on earth, how many evils and chastisements do I not spare out of regard for her? How many times I am in the act of destroying them and of making an end with them because of the great evils they commit, but by just looking at you and seeing in you my will and its fortress, I post myself again and I refrain. Therefore, my daughter, patience, and let my will always have complete life in you."
May 9th, 1929. Volume 26. How it was necessary that Jesus centralized in Luisa the human sanctity in order to consummate it and give rise to the sanctity of living in the Divine Will. How voluntary suffering is something great before God.
I had read in the first volume of my writings how our Lord had told me that he wanted me to accept going into battle against the infernal enemy and the hard trials to which I submitted myself. So I was thinking to myself, "It seems to me that there is contradiction, because Jesus has told me many times that one who lives in his Divine Will is not subject to either temptations or disturbances, nor does the enemy have the power to enter into the Divine Fiat, because it would burn him more than the very fire of hell, and in order not to be burned more, he runs away from the soul who lives in it."
Now, while I was thinking about this and many other things, my sweet Jesus, moving in my interior, told me, "My daughter, you are wrong, nor are there contradictions. You must know that since I was to call you in a way off special to live in my Divine Will, to make it known to you and through you make known to others the sanctity of living in it, so that it might reign on earth, it was necessary that I centralized in you the whole of the human sanctity in order to consummate it in you and to give rise to the true sanctity of living in my Divine Volition. Sanctity in the human order was to be the footstool, the throne of the sanctity in the order of my Divine Will. And this is why from the very beginning, when I called you to the state of victim and to all that you suffered during that time, first I would tell you to ask you whether you would accept, and after you had accepted, then I would put you in that state of pain. From you, I wanted voluntary suffering, not forced, because it was your will that I wanted to make die. And over your will, almost like a little plane that is extinguished, ignite the great fire of the Son of my Fiat. Voluntary suffering is something great before our supreme Majesty, and therefore, over the death of your will, drowned with pains, my will could have dominion and could dispose you to receive the greater good of its knowledge. Was it not my suffering all voluntary? No one could impose himself on me that formed a great good of redemption. So everything you suffered at that time was nothing other than the completion of the order of sanctity in the human way. And this is why I told you almost nothing about the sanctity of living in my Divine Will. I wanted to complete one in order to start the other. And when I saw that you denied me nothing of what I wanted, even at the cost of your life, and as you would deny me nothing, you would lose the way and would find itself in the continuous act of dying, my will made its way and reacquired its life in you. And as it kept reacquiring its life, so it kept revealing itself, telling you its long story, its sorrow, and how it yearns to come to reign in the midst of creatures. My word is life, and as I kept speaking to you about my Fiat, more than tender father, so I kept forming its life in you. In fact, you could never have understood what regarded my will had you not had its life in you, because it is what forms one's life that one has true interest in comprehending and defending. What does not form one's life enters into the secondary order, not the primary, and one does not feel the true love that one can have for one's own life. So to the very life of my Fiat formed in you, I couldn't trust all of its knowledge, to be able to form as many other lives of it in the creatures. And besides, I was to do with you what I did with myself when I came upon earth. I observed all laws, I submitted myself to all sacrifices of the ancient law in the perfect way as no one else had observed up to that time, and after I completed everything within me, consummating in my humanity all the laws and sanctities of the ancient world, I abolished them and gave rise to the new law of grace and to the new sanctity that I brought upon earth. So I have done with you. I centralized in you the pains, the sacrifices, the battles of the present sanctity in order to complete it, and therefore be able to start again the new sanctity of living in my will, that is, the Fiat voluntas tua on earth as it is in heaven. Now, where are the contradictions? You are saying when the soul enters into my will to live perennial life in it, the enemy cannot get close. His sight is dazzled by the light of my Fiat, nor is he able to see what the happy creature does in this divine light. Light shields itself from everything, it dominates all, it is intangible, it does not let itself be offended, nor does it offend. And if anyone wants to touch it or clasp it in his hands, with enchanting rapidity it escapes and almost playfully it sprays him with light. It touches everything, it embraces all to do good to all, but does not let itself be touched by anyone. Such is my Divine Will. It encloses the soul within its light, and with its Empire, it eclipses all evils. And as the soul lives of light, everything converts into light, into sanctity, and perennial peace. So evils get lost and lose their way. Disturbances, temptations, passions, sin remain all with their legs broken and can no longer walk. Therefore, be attentive, and let your living in my Fiat be continuous."
End of May 9th. Fiat.