Transcription
Sometimes the opposite of a good idea is another good idea. So I'm just about to give up, go on stage to give a talk, and the worst imaginable thing happens.
I go after I've had my duty pee. I then go and wash my hands like a well-brought-up boy, and the tap is insanely overactive and basically squirts out a whole load of water that flies off the front of the water basin and lands straight on the front of my trousers. I go, "How the hell do I go on stage now?" And I try the hand dryer. Absolutely no go.
So I decide maybe I'm going to do a runner. And then a miracle happens, which is outside it starts raining insane. And for the next two minutes, just before I go on stage, I just walk out and stand in the rain behind and underneath the most severe drip coming off the awning until I'm completely soaked.
And I go on stage and there's no problem at all. Okay. Now, admittedly, a load of people in the audience thought, "Why has this guy just fallen into a swimming pool?" But that's a hell of a lot better than what they would have thought had I left it the other way.