Transcription
A couple people mentioned that they liked seeing me write out on screen exactly which parts of jokes were setups, punches, and tags in the Todd Barry critique, and I really appreciate hearing about the stuff that y'all find valuable. So, do let me know. Let's dive a bit deeper into it and talk about dissecting jokes and these three major components.
Now, I mentioned it before, but I am still getting over being sick, so apologize for the froggy-sounding voice. Um, I'm not sure if they still teach sentence diagrams in school anymore, but it's definitely something that I had to learn to do. Mind you, I am by no means the first person to suggest diagramming jokes. It's in Greg Dean's book, *Step-by-Step to Stand-Up Comedy*, as is possibly the smartest thing I ever heard about comedy writing, which is Dean's two stories idea. Now, I don't love every page of that book, but I do recommend it. A link to the book below, and more on two stories in a minute.
The three basic parts of a joke are setup, punch, and tag. If you're even older than I am, or listen to comedians who are, you might hear them refer to tags as a "topper," but I prefer "tag." Now, you already know what a setup and a punch are. Those definitions are basically represented by the names. A tag is another punch that works based on a setup you already said. Its job is to keep people laughing a little longer on a working joke. You also already know what this is, because people do it all the time. Everybody who wants to get laughs understands that it's easier to prod people along a little farther when they're already laughing than it is to get the laugh in the first place. That's why funny people at work do stuff like repeating punch lines, or say, "You know what I mean?" as you know, as you're laughing, or, "Or I was like, what?" like any of that stuff that you say after the punch already is a tag. Okay, keep those three words in your mind while I paraphrase Greg Dean.
Here's the two stories rule: A joke should contain two stories, no more, no less. There's the story the setup tells, and the story the punchline reveals was there all along. Not his exact words, but my preferred streamline. This idea is so critical because it will help you defeat the second biggest problem you'll ever have as a writer. The first biggest problem is sitting down regularly and actually writing without over-editing yourself into a standstill, and the second is being too self-indulgent, which is to say you're being confusing or boring. Two stories, no more, no less. Now, put that in the back of your mind.
Let's just look at some jokes, just focusing on setup, punch, and tag. Here's Anthony Jeselnik, one of the most highly crafted joke deliverers out there. He's talking slowly, he's moving slowly, everything about this performance is saying, "Control, control, control." Now, trust me, if you go on stage tonight and deliver your material this slowly, it will feel very, very weird. It takes a long time to be as polished as Jeselnik is with it. Also, note that the tag here is meta, meaning that he's talking about his own performance as it's going on, but it still just tags on his previous setup.
"My my grandmother is suffering from dementia right now. She forgets who she is, wanders out of the house and gets lost for hours. It's a problem. So what I did is I tied a bell around her neck. Sounds inhumane, sure, but problem solved. I mean, that thing is really [Applause] heavy."
If you're not laughing right now, the problem is your imagination.
Here is Hannibal Buress with maybe one of his most famous jokes. Because this is the setup for this joke, and a longer chunk, it's a little bit longer. You can also hear Hannibal is getting laughs here based on his unique cadence.
"I have a situation in my apartment right now. I have a surplus of pickle juice in my apartment, too much pickle juice. 'Cause after the pickles are gone, I don't like throwing out the pickle juice. It just feels wasteful. So lately, I've been dipping my fingers in the pickle juice and I flick it on my sandwiches for flavor. Like that."
Next, another person whose work I love, Daniel Simonsen, said, "I just came from backstage. Uh, there was lots of mirrors in my room. Wherever I turned my head, there was a mirror. You know, so you can look at your own doubt."
Okay, so hopefully we're starting to get the idea of setup, punch, and tag. Now, remember, you do not have to write tags. In fact, you could get along fine in life if you only ever took time to write tags for jokes that you already know work. The most efficient open mic you could ever do would be just to say compact jokes that you wrote, then come back the next week having cut out the ones that didn't work, and having added tags onto the ones that did.
This time, let's look at the same jokes in terms of two stories. In Jeselnik's joke, the first story is that his grandmother has dementia and it's a problem. Anthony has solved it by putting a bell around her neck, which sounds inhumane. Then the punch is that he's even more inhumane than he let on, because the bell is very heavy.
"My my grandmother is suffering from dementia right now. She forgets who she is, wanders out of the house and gets lost for hours. It's a problem. So what I did is I tied a bell around her neck. Sounds inhumane, sure, but problem solved. I mean, that thing is really heavy."
Do you see how the punch reveals the second, greater story that was there all along?
Hannibal is a similar thing. He's got a situation in his apartment, too much pickle juice. He doesn't like throwing it out, it feels wasteful. But then the punch is him using it in a way we never saw coming.
"I have a situation in my apartment right now. I have a surplus of pickle juice in my apartment, too much pickle juice. 'Cause after the pickles are gone, I don't like throwing out the pickle juice. It just feels wasteful. So lately, I've been dipping my fingers in the pickle juice and I flick it on my sandwiches for flavor."
Also, note that during the setup, Hannibal is talking quickly, but then when we get to the pickle juice flicking, his cadence changes to be much more deliberate. "And I flick it on my sandwiches for flavor. Like that."
In Simonsen's joke, the first story is that there are a lot of mirrors backstage. In our minds, we imagine him looking at his face, his clothes. But the second story is that all Simonsen can see in the mirror is his own doubt, and we can all relate to that.
"But I just came from backstage. Uh, there was loads of mirrors in my room. Wherever I turned my head, there was a mirror. You know, so you can look at your own doubt."
If there's a sentence that gets laughs every time you say it, even though you're not 100% sure what the two stories are, well, keep saying it. More likely, though, as a new writer, you're adding too much stuff to the setup, not adding a punch at all, or writing a punch that doesn't really match the setup. In those cases, the two stories rule can really help you keep on track.
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