That's Just the Way I Am

Hey guys, welcome back to the channel. I hope everyone's doing well. Today, Ashley D will be here, and you guys, please remember to like, subscribe, and share. So our video topic today is called "That's just the way I am," "That's just the way I am."

So, do any of you realize that it is the will of God Almighty for you to allow the Holy Spirit to conform you to his image? He desires to conform you to his image. He does not want you conformed to the flesh, that is being conformed to the image of Satan. Okay? That is not God's will for you. Okay?

So, FYI, just some real basic lessons here to start out. We're talking about being the way you are, right? Well, if you have a certain type of temperament—we all have a specific temperament, right?—your temperament, whatever your temperament is, whatever your tendencies are, whatever your wounds are, whatever you're dealing with, there are always skills, healing, shiftings that can take place, therapies, supplements, and medications to help you with your issues. But this video is not about that. This video is about refusing to deal with your issues, driving people away because you refuse to deal with your issues, and it's about justifying foolishness. And this comes from a stubborn, blind heart that would refuse to deal with her issues, would drive people away, and would justify foolishness.

So, all that to say, beware of the voice of the flesh. Beware the voice of the flesh. Many, many times you hear this: "That's just the way I am." It is the flesh, not always, but very often. And so that's what this video is about, involved with this saying, "That's just the way I am"—to cover up your issues, to deny them, to refuse to deal with them, and to justify the foolishness you may be participating in. What's going on in your heart is denial. "Nope, I don't want to see it; I don't want to hear about it; don't bring it up with me." It's denial; it's justification. "Well, God made me this way, so it's just the way I am," right? And there is, of course, idolatry, and we're going to get into that about gifts in a minute. But there is a danger in the human psyche and in the human soul when you start to define yourself by your internal lies—maybe all of the lies that you internalized from the traumas you've been through. There is a danger, a very serious danger, when you start to define yourself by internal lies, by character deficits, by lack of development, and by misplaced identity. Misplaced identity often involves idolatry.

So what comes of all of this foolishness, lies? You're living in the dark because you're living in lies, bondage. You're locked up, and you can't get out, and darkness. So this is what comes from defining yourself by these things. I want to give you a little tip. Sometimes in your mind, you think it's you thinking something: "Oh, I have to have that," or, "Oh, this is just the way I am." Often, your thoughts that you think are your own are not yours. Satan is very clever and very cunning, and he knows how to deceive humans at every level and in every way. This is one of the ways he does it. He speaks to you in your mind with a voice that sounds just like yours, to make you believe that it's you, to blind you, and to block you from growth. Satan speaks to you in your mind as if it's your own voice thinking this thought. He does it with a voice just like yours to make you believe that it's you thinking that thought, to blind you to whatever the issue is and wherever the Lord is leading you to go, and to block you from growth.

So I want you to take this down in your notes, or on your phone, or in your brain, and make a little note there. And I want you—your—the real you on the inside to be like a fly on the wall in your internal world. And I want you to observe your thoughts, and I want you to observe the way you operate in your internal world. And I want you to ask the Holy Spirit to shine a light onto those mechanisms and those operations within you—all that functionality that you think it's just all me, and it's always been this way. The Holy Spirit will unpack that for you, and he'll show you what's you and what's not you, and he'll show you what to do about it as well. Okay? Very important, because this is a deception that's operating in this mentality. Okay, so let's give some examples of this mentality: "That's just the way I am." Some examples, and these can come from wounding, this can come from your self-agenda, your own agenda, your own ego, and it can often come, of course, from works of the flesh, which you can go read in Galatians 5:19-21. These are some things you will hear in your own mind or from other people: "I'm just—I'm just rude; there's nothing I can do about it. I'm just really loud; I'm just really loud, and it bothers people, and that's just the way I am." Do you know I've had to teach my husband, about 20 years ago, inside voice and outside voice, and now he knows what those are, and he uses them. What else? "I'm just a big mouth or a blabbermouth." Have you heard these? "I'm just really self-centered; I'm a little narcissist, and everything is all about me; that's just the way I am. I'm just lustful; every time I look at someone, I imagine perverse things with them and/or I imagine them without their clothes on. I'm just lazy." Okay, if you're a believer and you have been regenerated, you thinking and saying these things is not the Holy Spirit in you operating. It's not the Holy Spirit in you operating; it's something else. It is your flesh; it is a blind spot you have; it is the enemy blocking you from growth.

What other examples do we have when you hear, "That's just the way I am"? It can also come across as: "I have to—I just have to do these things. I have to interrupt people because I have ADHD or whatever, or I'm a—I'm a spaz, or I'm um—whatever your excuse would be. I have to interrupt; I have to be codependent 'cause I've been through really hard times, and I'm just codependent; I have to be that way. I have to molest little boys; I just have to do it. I have to dominate others and control people; I just have to do it; that's just the way I am. I have to tell every single detail of everything I ever talk about. If I watch a football game, I have to tell every single play of the whole game; I have to tell every detail because that's just the way I am. I have to call you or my friends five or 10 times a day; I just have to do it; it's just the way I am. I have to rape my sisters; I have to do it; I have to rape them because I want to, and I have to, and I'm going to keep doing it. I have to control situations, or I have to steal; I have to steal when I go shopping; I have to go shoplift when I shop because that's just the way I am." Do you hear the darkness in all of this? Do you hear that this is not the Holy Spirit? Do you hear that this comes from someone who is in deep bondage and deep darkness?

So these type of sayings, when you hear this coming from someone, when you hear, "That's just the way I am," as a justification for flesh, as a justification for sin, as a justification for driving people away and refusing to deal with their issues and justifying foolishness, this is involved here. Galatians 6:7 and 8, reaping and sowing will be going on here. These examples will definitely drive people away. They will drive people away, and when you refuse to deal with your issues, you will drive people away. You're damaging yourself; you're grieving the Lord, and you are damaging other people. So the scripture here in Galatians 6 says, "Do not be deceived." It doesn't say, "Be deceived"; it says, "Do not be deceived in what you're doing, in the choices that you're making." God will not ever be mocked. Every man or woman will reap what he or she sows. Do not be deceived; God will not be mocked; every man and woman will reap what they sow. So when you're involved in these type things and you're saying these things and thinking these things in your internal world, don't be deceived, because you're going to reap what you sow. That is the way of the Lord.

So I want to go over misplaced identity real quick before we close here. Um, misplaced identity is very important, and it's a big problem with believers. Our identity as believers is to be in Christ alone, in Christ alone. This is what the scripture teaches us: Galatians 2:20, Ephesians 2:10, 2 Corinthians 5:17, John 1:12, 15, and 16, Romans 8:17, Colossians 2:10, 1 John 3:1, and 1 Peter 2:9. When your identity is misplaced—that means it's put into something else—you are going to be unstable, and you are going to be ineffective to the degree that you do that in the Lord. Whatever you're doing and whatever your gifts are, you will be, to that extent, ineffective and unstable. So your identity—here's your identity—it is to be in the living, risen Christ. That's your identity in the Lord. Why? Because that's what the scripture teaches. But when you put your identity and get your identity from him, it's that much quicker that he conforms you to his image because you're focusing on him and receiving from him and trusting in him, and you're surrendered and submitted to him. When your identity is in Christ, you go in the HOV lane in a lot of your growth. So mind you, this identity—and no other identity in the entire universe—is perfect. When your identity is in Christ, you have a perfect identity. Did you know there's no other identity in the world, in the universe, that is perfect? And the scripture is telling us to get our identity from a perfect Savior. When you get your identity exclusively from the Lord Jesus Christ, your identity is also eternal. That means it never ends; it is timeless, so it will never die, and you will never lose it. So that is a very special identity: one that is perfect, number one, and two, eternal. You can't find that anywhere else. You can go to Hebrews 5:9 if you want to read about that.

Now, gifts. God has given us all gifts, right? People confuse gifts with identity. They confuse gifts and identity, and this is where misplaced identity—in many other places—usually results in idolatry. Misplaced identity results in idolatry. So let's look at some giftings. 1 Peter 4:10 talks about gifts. You can have spiritual gifts. These are some examples over here: giving, teaching, prophecy, hospitality, etc. And you have natural gifts: writing, storytelling, sports, music, etc. So you want to understand and operate out of the fact that gifts flow from identity. Identity is your core, and anything you do gift-wise flows from your identity. So you can put arrows like this: from your identity flows your giving, spiritual gift-wise; from your identity flows your teaching; from your identity flows your prophetic gifting; and from your identity flows your hospitality. Identity is the base; is the foundation, because Jesus Christ is the cornerstone and the rock that you're building your life on. The gifts are like the fruit from that identity; they flow from it. Likewise for the natural gifts: your writing would be a flow from your identity in Christ; your storytelling would be a flow from your identity; same with sports or music or whatever your gifts would be. The mistake that people make is that they take a gift, and they're not identified with Christ and getting their identity from him, and they take their gift, and they make it an idol. See? And the moment you're into idolatry, you are blind in that area, and it can affect other areas as well. So that's why I'm saying that when your identity is in Christ alone, then you avoid the idolatry. But when you have a misplaced identity, namely starting by not identifying with Christ and letting something else be your identity, bam, you're over into idolatry. Okay?

So we could summarize this by saying that gifts flow from identity. Gifts that you do flow from your identity in Christ. That's your foundation. The gifts do not replace your identity, because that is idolatry. Idolatry is flesh, and it blinds you to God's truth, to his grace, to the growth that you want, and to the fruit of the gifting will be blocked, and it will blind you to many other things. So, in other words, don't make your gifts idols, no matter how wonderful or powerful your gifting is. Say you have a teaching gift; say you have a prophetic gift; say you have a—a gift of hospitality that's just over the top—don't make it an idol. It is a gift that God has given to you, and he wants to see what you're going to do with it. He wants to see if you are going to be humble and use it wisely for his glory, or if you're going to think that you have created the gift and that you own the gift and that you're going to get the glory for it. See, that would all be idolatry. So a lot of times people who say, "That's just the way I am," to justify the flesh, and who say these type of things, they don't have a strong capacity for self-reflection, and they're not interested in growth. Maybe they have been previously, but they're not interested in growth anymore. So that is usually the case, or I should say, often the case. So misplaced identity is very important. You don't want to have a misplaced identity in Christ. You want your identity to be in the Lord Jesus Christ. That's what the scripture teaches, the New Testament. So your identity is in Christ; it's not in the flesh. This is not your identity; this is all destructive, and it's the flesh. When you put your identity in the flesh or in a gift, you are blocking him from growing you in that place, and there are ricochet effects to other areas in your life.

So what would Satan's bait be here? What would he be telling you, or how would he be messaging you in your mind, or however you'd receive it? What would be the message? "Just stay where you are; you're fun; don't follow the Lord; don't be an extremist; don't be a fanatic; you're good; you believe." See, he will cause you to feel unusually comfortable where you are and kind of douse your light so that you will stop following the Lord and you will start to follow your own understanding, which is always a terrible idea. So I have an example of myself. I have a gift—gift of teaching. Teaching is one of my gifts, right? Obviously. So I would take my gift of teaching, if I were not going to have a strong identity in Christ, and I would lift it up to be an idol: "I'm a teacher; I have to teach." So every person I came in contact with, I would have to teach them something. So how do you think people would feel if every person I had—every friend I had or every interaction I had with another person—I had an agenda to teach them because that's just the way I am, because God gave me this gift of teaching? Do you know how many people would be avoiding me? A lot. Well, thank the Lord I don't do that, and I hope you don't do it either. Another example: someone who is a believer who has a natural gift for telling stories: "I'm just a storyteller; that's just the way I am." So when I tell a story, I have to tell the whole thing, or I'm a very detailed person, so I have to tell every detail of everything I ever say, and people are rolling their eyes, and they are looking for a way to get away from this person. This person also cannot tell a long story short. "No, I can't tell a long story short because I'm just a detailed person. No, I can't get to the point; no, I can never get to the point." Why? Because I'm a detailed person; that's just the way I am; I'm a storyteller, right? This is fraud; this is someone who is blind, spiritually blind, and you don't have to tolerate that. That is foolishness, and you can use a boundary for foolishness. You don't want to tolerate foolishness, and you don't want to be more patient with these people; you want to use a big fat boundary with them.

So the main point here is that you want to be open to the Lord growing you up into Christ, growing you up into Christ in every area, because you belong to him, and you want his will done in your life, not your own deceived perception. You don't want that. You also don't want to get to heaven, and when the Lord says to you this: "Well, you know, I had so much more planned for you for your growth and development and healing, but you resisted me, and you insisted on your own way." You don't want to hear that. So I pray that none of you will get to heaven and hear that awful truth from the Lord. You want to use your gifts flowing from your identity in Christ, and you want to use them as the Holy Spirit leads you—your spiritual gifts and your natural gifts. You don't want to impose your idolatrous gift onto other people. That's idolatry; it's destructive, and it makes things unsustainable; it blinds you, and it blocks you from growth and from the will of God. Okay? So a lot of the time it's not just the way you are; it's just the way you are operating right now. But the Lord wants to grow you to a better place. That's often the reality. It's not just the way you are; it happens to be where you are now. But when you connect with the Lord and align with him, he will take you out of so many bad habits and deceptions and distortions in your mind, and he will always take you out of idolatry. That's a no-brainer for him in—in your relationship with him; he will take you out of idolatry. So the Lord wanted me to do this video, and so I hope this has been helpful. You guys have a blessed day. Please remember to like, subscribe, and share, and I'll see you soon.